8/3: Commie Compass Results, Muslim-Style Fun
• Now it is time for the moment of truth. Over the past month I’ve been revealing my answers to that Political Compass thing. Now where exactly do I belong on this grid? Am I among the ranks of Hitler and Stalin, or, even worse, George W. Bush? Let’s see:
My score:
Economic Left/Right: 1.63
Social Libertarian/Authoritarian: 0.82
And just who is the world figure I am closest to?
Former President (or whatever the hell they’re called over there) Gerard Schroeder.
The fuck? How the hell am I even close to thinking like this asshole? Oh well, if the Political Compass says I think like this guy then I guess they’re right. Hooray socialism and double-digit unemployment rates!
• Too bad Texas Republicans have to keep Tom DeLay’s name on the November ballot. Perhaps if you people asked the New Jersey State Supreme Court to intervene on your behalf you might get somewhere. For those that don't know, back in '02 these red-diaper doper babies violated the law and let Democrats put a new candidate on the ballot, even though the deadline for doing such a thing had expired for this midterm election. Oh, wait, y’all Texans are Republicans. Nevermind.
Woah, woah, woah. Back up a second. I just noticed the name of my last link source.
By: Mike D in SC
Even though the word "twatrock" wasn't used in that linked article, can it be? 
• Well no fucking shit. Fatties are in more danger during a heat wave. Next thing I know you’ll tell me that the obese also face greater risks of heart disease and diabetes than skinny people.
• Every now and then you come across a story that no matter what you do you can’t top the actual article itself. This is one of those instances. A lot of times when someone re-posts a story in its entirety on a message board one or two sentences/quotes/etc. are bolded for emphasis. If I were to do that for the story below, the whole article would be in bold-face.
Theme Park Calls Off "Muslim Fun Day"
London, England (AHN)-Britain's biggest theme park announced it has called off the country's first "National Muslim Fun Day" because of lack of interest.
Alton Towers in central England was to open on September 17 for Muslims-complete with halal food, a strict dress code and prayer areas. Music, gambling and alcohol were to be banned for the day and theme park rides such as "Ripsaw," "Corkscrew" and "Charlie and the Chocolate Factory" would have been segregated by sex.
But the park says the event's organizers, Islamic Leisure, who rented the park for the day and were marketing the event, had called it off due to "insufficient ticket sales."
In a statement, the park says, "Alton Towers is disappointed that the planned Family Fun Day Sunday 17th September has had to be canceled," with a park spokeswoman assuring Islamic Leisure would refund those who bought tickets.
Organizers had hoped to fill a niche for Britain's 1.7 million Muslims, some of whom may be uncomfortable with mainstream entertainment.
But the fun day had caused some controversy: a non-Muslim couple scheduled to hold their wedding at the park's hotel complained to newspapers that event organizers told them the bride and female guests would have to cover up.
The park promised the party would be exempt from the rules. A park spokeswoman said the wedding would take place as planned.
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