10/13: Trivial Pursuits
• I listen to Glenn Beck’s radio show every now and then from 10-11:30 a.m. in my market (about 2-3 times per week at the most). I guess I have to be in a certain mood for him; God knows what that mood is, though. Every Friday during the NFL season his show spends an hour doing this gimmick called “Moron Trivia.” What they do take a football game scheduled for that week (today it was Seattle at St. Louis), call several convenience store workers from both cities and ask them some current events questions. Whichever city gets the most correct answers from their clerks “wins” the contest, and more times than not what city’s team ends up winning the game. Basically, this is like those Jaywalking segments on “The Tonight Show” or that “Street Smarts” program. Did I mention that I hate these shows? Whenever these “let’s ask stupid people questions so we can all laugh at them” skits sprout up, I generally go “eh” and change the television channel or radio station. For some reason I was listening to “Moron Trivia” today, and one of the questions he asked these Quickie-Mart workers depressed me for some reason. The question was, “The stock market recently a) hit a record high, b) hit a record low, c) is another example of failure by the Bush administration or d) [something about John Kerry – I can’t remember what it was]. The convenience store clerks guessed that the stock market hit a record low. Now do you see why I don’t mind it when the mindless masses don’t bother voting? Seeing how most of these places have several newspapers that get stocked on a daily basis, I find it laughable that these people don’t even bother to read these publications; lord knows I did during my tenure at this job. (The other “Moron Trivia” questions for this segment was “What number month is October?” “North Korea recently launched what?” and “Who is Corey Lidle?”)
• Speaking of Corey Lidle, I got sick of hearing how he crashed his plane into a New York City building five minutes after hearing this story when it first broke. Yeah, it’s a shame and all that shit, but who gives a fuck if he played professional baseball? I guess if Joe Smith, an architect who recreationally flew planes, smashed into a building it wouldn't have been as big a deal. Talk about East Coast bias.
• Then again, maybe this is George Steinbrenner’s new way of dumping salary.
A private jet, carrying Yankees third baseman Alex Rodriguez and six others, overran a runway at Bob Hope Airport on Friday and was brought to a halt by an arresting system.
• Thanks to the mainstreamliberalpress, we are seeing Republicans get hammered for hitting on pages, accepting bribes and other types of bad stuff. Well, Medium-Large Media, where’s your outrage over this? We can’t have 61-year old men beating up people who oppose the grizzly practice of murdering the unborn and are, uh, dressed in cockroach costumes while at the ... Kansas State Fair. Man is election night going to suck this year.
A legislator was charged with scuffling with the cockroach-costumed president of an anti-abortion group at a gubernatorial debate last month.
Democratic state Rep. Vaughn Flora, 61, turned himself in Wednesday on a battery charge filed Sept. 27 in the dustup during the debate at the Kansas State Fair.
Troy Newman, president of Operation Rescue, and another man attended the Sept. 9 event while wearing cockroach costumes and masks bearing photos of Democratic Gov. Kathleen Sebelius, who was debating Republican challenger Jim Barnett.
• So Kathie Gifford is going to play Miss Hannigan in some hippie “Annie” musical. I’m sure there’s a sweatshop joke to be made somewhere in there, but it’s a Friday and I’m running on fumes.
• While kids in urban areas have to deal with drive-bys and life in the ghetto, their more rural counterparts have to deal with haircut rage. Uh, OK. How about if someone pisses you off you just stab them with the scissors instead of trying to take a little bit off the top?
Two teenagers are accusing each other of assaulting each other by haircut. An 18-year-old Des Moines East High School student told police Wednesday that another teenager came up behind her with a pair of scissors and began cutting her hair.
The student claimed that when she tried to get the scissors away from her attacker she was cut on her hand and face.
Officers then interviewed the female suspect, also an 18-year-old. She claimed it was the other student who picked up the scissors and began furiously cutting her hair. The suspect was missing "a large quadrant of hair from the front of her head," according to a police report.
Officers are investigating both claims. No charges have been filed. Crime scene investigators were called to take photographs of injuries and haircuts.
• Wow. There are a bunch of gems in the latest batch of “odd” stories pile tonight. Last one, I promise. Although I have done a number of things to a customer's order during my days in the food-service industry, I have never peed in someone's soft drink. Now doing such a thing while off the clock? Well, um, I just hope the statue of limitations for that sort of thing has a short shelf life.
Anthony Mesa, 22, was sentenced to six months in jail and two years of a form of house arrest for urinating in the bottle of Mountain Dew and must also periodically take a urine drug test. Mesa said Wednesday, however, that he has a condition called shy bladder which affects his ability to urinate in public and therefore to take the drug test. He had failed to take a court-ordered test Sept. 19, the Orlando Sentinel reported ... Mesa, a former convenience store clerk at a Pix store in Deltona, pleaded no contest to tampering with a consumer product. A construction worker who purchased the drink he urinated in began vomiting after drinking the product.
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