Jump to content
TSM Forums
  • entries
    921
  • comments
    1601
  • views
    156221

1/4: Important Hispanics, Crazy Judges

Sign in to follow this  
kkktookmybabyaway

131 views

9 p.m.

 

100 Most Influential Hispanics? I don't think I could name 100 Hispanics, period. Wait a second: I forgot about baseball players. Nevermind, I'm good.

 

Jennifer Lopez is among the entertainers selected by People en Espanol for its "100 Most Influential Hispanics" issue, which honours those who have made an impact in the Hispanic community.

 

...

 

Lopez tops the list of entertainers, which also includes Antonio Banderas, Carlos Santana, Eva Longoria, George Lopez, Gloria Estefan, Ricky Martin, Salma Hayek and Shakira, among others.

 

The magazine also honours filmmaker Alejandro Gonzalez Inarritu (culture/the arts), Attorney General Alberto Gonzales (politics/public affairs), businessman Carlos Slim Helu (business), MTV President Christina Norman (media), Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim owner Arturo Arte Moreno (sports), sociologist Aida Giachello (science and technology/health) and teacher Bertha Flores (education).

• So what if our former Chief Justice thought the CIA was out to get him. This was the CIA, so it was probably true.

 

The FBI's file on former Chief Justice William Rehnquist -- made public more than a year after his death -- indicates the Nixon and Reagan administrations enlisted its help in blunting criticism of him during confirmation hearings.

 

The file also offers insight into the hallucinations and other symptoms of withdrawal that Rehnquist suffered when he was taken off a prescription painkiller in 1981. A doctor was cited as saying that Rehnquist, an associate justice of the Supreme Court at the time, tried to escape the hospital in his pajamas and imagined that the CIA was plotting against him.

 

5 p.m.

 

• Update on the turkey baster family. For those not in the know, here is what I am talking about:

 

Mrs. kkk’s one cousin married some near-toothless Mexican who already has several kids from a previous marriage that he does shit with. Both were part-time janitors when they decided to have kids. There’s one problem: the Mexican is sterile, so they went to the clinic to knock the chick up via turkey baster. Please keep in mind that by now they have already claimed bankruptcy once and collect welfare, among other wonderful gimmies from the government. Because kid number one was such a joy, they decided to have another test-tube baby. Oh, and these welfare pros have purchased their own house and have a new car. All on a part-time janitor’s salary. Oh, and the wife works for the State as a “maid.” She gets paid to “clean up” half of her aunt’s house. What she actually does is sit down and watch TV all day. Why did I say “half of her aunt’s house”? Well because another relative is supposed to clean up the other half.
Mrs. kkk found out this afternoon, when trying to call Tonya to RSVP her presence at little Reba's birthday party this weekend, that Tonya turns her ringer off. Why? Because she's tired of all the bill-collectors calling. Oh, and Gary is pissed off because with Tonya's job of sitting around doing nothing, err, I mean cleaning her aunt's house (actually, I think it now may be her mom, rather than aunt) for the State, they are $100 over some marker and can't collect as much welfare. Of course, that was bound to happen when Gary eventually gets upgraded to full-time status with the County Courthouse's janitorial staff. I should note that the better half will be going to this party and not me. Why is that? Because these people didn't attend our wedding. Believe me, I didn't want them attending. I love cashing in "Get Out Of Family Events Because The People Hosting It Didn't Come To Your Wedding" cards.

 

3 p.m.

 

Now let me get this straight...

 

The baby album for Rebekah Markham’s soon-to-be-born child could include something extra special: photos of officers using flat-bottomed boats to rescue the youngster’s frozen embryo from a sweltering hospital.

 

Markham is about to give birth by Caesarean section, nine months after being implanted with an embryo that nearly thawed when the flooded hospital lost electricity in the chaotic aftermath of Hurricane Katrina.

 

“It’s going to be exciting for the little baby, once he gets old enough to realize what it went through,” said Markham, 32, a physical therapist whose husband, Glen Markham, 42, is a New Orleans police officer.

 

“Katrina’s history. A big part of history.”

 

The baby — the Markhams do not know whether they are having a boy or a girl — will be one of the first children born from the more than 1,400 embryos rescued from Lakeland Hospital two weeks after the storm.

 

Lt. Eric Bumgarner, one of seven Illinois Conservation Police officers and three Louisiana state troopers who sloshed through floodwaters to remove the embryos, said he has often wondered what happened to them.

 

“One of these embryos could be the next president,” he said.

So while black people were on top of houses waiting to be rescued, cops were saving frozen embryos? That's ... the most awesome thing I've ever heard. Yeah, I know it says this rescue took place a fortnight after the storm, but that information is all the way down in the fifth paragraph -- nobody actually reads that far down in these posted articles.

 

• Christ, I can't remember who I picked in Week 16. I'll just do a "correct/incorrect" quickie run-down and highlight the really stupid things I said while predicting this week's slate of games.

 

Minnesota at Green Bay (3.5) –– Incorrect

(6.5) Kansas City at Oakland –– Correct

Baltimore at Pittsburgh (3.5) –– Correct

Carolina at Atlanta (6.5) -– Correct

(4.5) Chicago at Detroit -- Correct (The joke was almost on me.)

You GOT to be kidding.
(9.5) Indianapolis at Houston -- Incorrect

New England at Jacksonville (2.5) -- Correct

New Orleans at N.Y. Giants (3.5) -- Incorrect (Final score: Saints 30, Giants 7.)

I first went with the Saints, but this is being played in the Northeast.
Tampa Bay at Cleveland (3.5) -- Correct

Tennessee at Buffalo (4.5) -- Correct

Washington at St. Louis (2.5) -- Incorrect

Arizona at San Francisco (4.5) -- Incorrect

Cincinnati at Denver (3.5) -- Incorrect

(4.5) San Diego at Seattle -- Incorrect

Philadelphia at Dallas (7.5) -- Incorrect

I just heard Jeff Garcia talk for the first time last week. No wonder T.O. made those gay cracks at him. I think the Garcia wave ends here, although I find it funny Owens has disparaged two quarterbacks during his career on the other side of the field for this game.
N.Y. Jets at Miami (2.5) -- Incorrect

Congrats to the Jets, even if they don’t make the playoffs. I think the Dolphins will treat this like a playoff game, costing their divisional foe a chance at the postseason.

 

This week's score: 7-9

Cumulate score: 107-117

 

Well, it was looking good until those pesky last 6 games. :angry:

 

Oops. I forgot about my Week 15 Pickkk results.

Sign in to follow this  

×