9 p.m.

• So I finally saw that Jeff Gordon video where his car gets pelted with beer after winning some race that put him past the late Dale Earnhardt in the wins total, or something like that.

Holy crap was that funny. I’ve said before I’m not a NASCAR fan, so I don’t know shit about caution flags, points or changing tires in 4 seconds. Back in the late 1990s when I worked third shift at a yearbook publishing center in Sappy Valley, a few people around me would always talk NASCAR. Of course I had no idea what they were fighting about, but one thing I took from their heated debates was that you were either a Gordon fan or an Earnhardt fan. If that’s the case, I probably would be in the Earnhardt camp. But like I said above, that video was hilarious. Good job, Alabama. For some reason the first thought to pop into my head after seeing this was that faux commercial South Park did a while back titled “Alabama Man.”

• In keeping up with the San Fran theme from the 1:30 p.m. entry, here's another story that was conceived in this city.

A nonprofit organization has unveiled a series of electronic greeting cards that concerned friends and relatives can send to a woman after she chooses to have an abortion.

 

Like Exhale's confidential talk line for women who have had abortions, the six e-cards available on the group's Web site were designed to be nonpartisan and encompass the range of someone's potential responses to going through an abortion.

Nonpartisan my ass. None of those six e-cards went with my submission, which was "Think of all the money you just saved on clothes, food and college tuition." When someone has a living being sucked out of them, you need them to focus on the positive.

Although greeting card offerings have expanded in recent years to include such milestones as divorce, potty-training and half-birthdays, Baker said she was unaware of anyone else providing after-abortion cards online. The inspiration for the project came in part from a longtime abortion provider who frequently observed there were no Hallmark cards for abortion, she said.

Oh I sense future government intervention on this one forcing Big Greeting Card to sell something for this kind of occasion. What do you want Hallmark to do -- have these cards on the rack next to the "newborn," or "baby's first birthday" offerings?

1:30 p.m.

• So San Fran's tops for pets. I'm sure there's a gerbil/hamster joke to be made here, but I'm above such juvenile tomfoolery.

An abundance of pet-friendly hotels, off-leash dog parks and vegetarian restaurants helped this city place first Monday on an animals rights group's list of America's most humane cities.

 

Seattle; Portland, Ore.; Washington, D.C.; and San Diego followed San Francisco in the Humane Society of the United States' inaugural index, which the organization compiled using state-level and national data.

Seattle and Portland I understand, but DC?! I guess they only shoot humans, not pets. Actually, the amount of respect I have for Washington has just increased.