kkk's Top 103 Posters

Number 24: Teke184/cop/whoever

Now some of you may be wondering why the 2005 Lucky Strikes Cigarettes Tar Bowl Champion is on my list – wasn’t he the one who banned Frigid over the infamous “sniper” remark that in turn triggered a shitstorm the likes of which has rarely been equaled at this place? To this I say, “yeah, and so what?” If Teke didn’t ban Frigid that whole thread, not to mention the others that spawned from it, wouldn't have been as entertaining as they were. Besides, it’s not like the other two points in this love triangle aren’t being represented. Slapnuts is on this list, as is Frigid, who went on to cause havoc with an entirely separate message board. Besides, teke can also find me entertaining at times … wait a second, that was tekecop. Are they the same? I don’t know. Either way, both names begin with “teke,” so that’s close enough for me. He also helped a brotha out in a previous kkk Bowl season and lets us know of Michael Vick’s Doggie-gate scandal with frequent updates over at the other place. And believe me, if there’s one thing I want to know about it’s how someone is pissing away his God-given athletic fortune just to see a few bitches go at it.

And now a word or two from the expert panel I have put together to comment on the people I’ve listed.

From SFA Jack:

He got de-modded over some stupid TSM fake drama, didn't he? I think I remember thinking that was unfair. Maybe not. Either way, teke is a good guy. Underrated poster.

From Cancer Marney:

Teke rocks, but in a bland sort of way. I rarely see him online. This prolly means that he actually has a life, that he does more for more people than the rest of you pathetic, miserable, shiteating wastes of flesh, and that he doesn't really give a damn what I say about him. So good for Teke. And the rest of you could kiss my ass, but that would be a bit too much of a treat for you. So just wallow in your misery instead, 'k? Thanks.

5:15 p.m.

• OK, so for this past week on Jim Rome’s ESPN show he’s had some guy from Chicago and this black chick on his panel, and I’ve been digging this pair, especially the latter one. Something that turns me off about people that get on these shows is that they look like they don’t want to be there. This chick is an exception to this rule. But then we got to today with the Marvin Lewis “the cops are profiling my team” story. During this topic she brings up the “the Cincy po-pos have killed 15 black men since 1995."

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

OK, people, for those that haven’t lived in the southwestern Ohio region, let me fill you in on something. Whenever you hear this “15 black men killed by the PO-lice since 1995,” let me fill you in on a little secret.

"Of the 15 police intervention deaths involving black males since 1995, 12 of those 15 suspects were armed with deadly weapons," said Keith Fangman, a beat cop and president of the Cincinnati Fraternal Order of Police. "Eight of them were armed with guns in which they shot at our officers or pointed guns at our officers. One was armed with a brick. One was armed with a two-by-four with a cluster of nails on the end of it. And two were armed with automobiles, one in which our officer was dragged to his death."

Pity, and I liked her, too.

12 p.m.

• Too bad pops wasn't with his lush son driving from bar to bar. Now I see where Joshy got his sense of personal responsibility from.

The father of St. Louis Cardinals pitcher Josh Hancock sued a restaurant, the driver of a stalled car and a towing company for their roles in his son's death.

 

Hancock, 29, was killed April 29 when his sport-utility vehicle smashed into the back of a tow truck that was assisting a disabled car on a highway in St. Louis. Police said Hancock was drunk, had marijuana in his car, was speeding and wasn't wearing a seat belt.

 

The suit, filed in St. Louis Circuit Court, said Mike Shannon's Steaks and Seafood and its manager, Patricia Shannon Van Marte, served Hancock drinks even though he was visibly intoxicated, and that his intoxication was ``involuntary.''

 

It also said the driver of the disabled vehicle, Justin Tolar was negligent for allowing his car to crash into the median and stall in the left lane of the highway.

 

Eddie's Towing LCC and the tow-truck driver, Jacob Edward Hargrove, were negligent in pulling up behind the stalled car without providing a warning to oncoming traffic, the lawsuit said

 

Hancock's father, Noel Dean Hancock, is seeking damages in excess of $25,000.

10 a.m.

• This morning I was thumbing through some old newspapers at work in search for print ads whose ideas I can steal pay homage to when I create ads of my own. Recently, my local newspaper printed its “best of” businesses for the year – you know, “best steaks,” “best hospital,” etc. Well, the winner of “best vet” was this asshole who we originally took our three cats to until Shadow got sick and we found out this guy had no idea what he was doing. When I informed the better half via e-mail this morning about this, she responded by saying…

Yeah, I guess he's the best vet because he wants to send sick pets to Ohio for diagnostic testing. Not to mention misdiagnosing pets to scare the crap out of their owners.

Yeah, she’ll be fuming over this one for the next day or two.

• While on the subject of work, I have to tell this story. About a week ago my idiot boss was talking about something or other, and he said to me that “we must bend over backwards for our customers.” Now just hearing these words come out of his mouth is funny enough, but yesterday the real punch line arrived.

Long story short. In our organization’s most recent publication, I created an ad for some yearlong promotion. Customers started receiving the publication on Wednesday and yesterday someone actually called in to inquire about said ad. This is what the ad tells you to do, after all. When my idiot boss was told by one of his secretaries (we are all his secretaries) that someone had questions about this promotion, he told the secretary to tell the caller that more information will be mailed out in a mass mailing that he hasn’t even planned yet and will take at least two weeks to complete. Bend over backwards indeed.