10 p.m.

• So I just got done watching "Crash." Holy shit did that deserve to win an Oscar -- for best comedy. I can't remember another film from recent memory in which I've laughed so hard for so long.

3 p.m.

• About damn time, A-Rod. Now the sports media can talk about when you are going to hit 600~!

• So I’m in the mood to make fun of my employers. In two weeks I will be at another board meeting where I’m sure there will be plenty of bitching about the downward spiral of our organization. Why is my workplace in the shitter? Perhaps this example might shed some light on the subject:

In August of 2006 it was voted on to raise our annuity rates by a half-point in order to generate much-needed business. In addition, it was voted on to start a print advertising campaign to, you know, let people know of this rate increase, which was considerably higher than the rest of the market. My idiot boss was lukewarm to this, claiming outside advertising doesn’t work. Between this time and the next meeting in November I produced about a half-dozen ad concepts and filed them away until the idiot decides to ask for them.

In November of 2006, there is no mention of this ad campaign at the board meeting. In February of 2007, nothing is done at this meeting either.

In May of 2007, it is determined that we cut the annuity rates because they didn’t generate the type of business the powers-that-be had hoped. The idiot boss also tells everybody that the print ad campaign will be done “sometime this summer.” My ads are still lounging in my “stuff the boss will forget about because shiny objects around him are easy distractions” folder.

As of Friday, August 3, there is still no mention of these ads from the powers-that-be.

So, in summary, we raised annuity rates for nearly nine months in hopes of attracting customers. We didn’t advertise these rates and nobody bought them. If any advertising will now be done, it will tout rates that have been reduced and are at par with the rest of the industry and are really not all that spectacular, especially with a stock market at 14,000. (Quick lesson: the better the stock market does, the worse it is for the annuity market and vice versa.) This will then make the idiot boss say, “See? outside advertising does not work. Just like I told you all before.”

Did I forget mention that at the August 2006 meeting it was determined the theme of these ads were to pimp our increased annuity rates?

Like I’ve said before, there’s something charming about watching this kind of behavior – in a train wreck sort of way. Now you might ask, “How come you didn’t show your boss the ads you created nearly a year ago?” Because when you deal with people this incompetent, the best thing to do is step away, keep your mouth shut and avoid them whenever possible. If you get too close to a tar pit, then you’ll be dragged in as well. Trust me on this one.

10:30 a.m.

• So I had to go with the better half to some annual church bazaar and had to play Bingo for 90 minutes. Actually, I don’t mind Bingo. It’s rather fun to piss off Mrs. kkk by flipping those chip-things around and hear all the old people bitch about not being able to hear the numbers called out. In fact, last night’s outing was downright awesome because the Bingo caller’s kid was helping call out numbers. Did I mention the kid has Downs. Do I need to say any more? Wow, were there a number of angry blue-hairs. Please note I’m not giddy the kid has Downs. Rather, it was hilarious to watch so many people try to understand what she was calling out when her dad would call out the same number a few seconds later.