9 p.m.

• So earlier today I had ESPN on – pretty sure it was the “Sports Reporters,” if not then it was one of their talking heads – and one guy on there says that MLB’s western divisional races are the best stories not being told. He then said that he can’t wait for the postseason so we can see these teams in the Pacific Time Zone play on a regular basis. Uh, these teams could be out in three games during the playoffs. I wouldn’t call that “regular.”

• I spent this weekend cleaning the house – I know, I make a great housewife. And while doing this I typically have sports on as background noise. After the Cubs beat the Astros, I was flipping channels and came across this show on the BBC America channel called “How Clean is Your House?” Long story short: these two British chicks go to messy houses, yell at the occupants, show them what a petri dish they are living in and make everything nice and tidy. Holy crap are these houses bad. Another thing I observed was during the commercial breaks the station was pimping it’s newscasts saying something like, “it’s the best coverage on America.” Riiiiiiiiiight.

• Video of crazy cats. My favorites are the ones where children are the victims.

2:30

• So I just watched another NBC “To catch a…” special, but this had nothing to do with adults wanting to bang 13-year olds. This one deal with identity theft, and while it wasn’t as bang-bang-bang in busting pervs and scam artists, it was entertaining in its own right. I think the funniest part of the whole thing was seeing the stupid Americans fall for Internet relationships and shipping thousands upon thousands of dollars worth of merchandise for them. Jesus, are these people pathetic. The best part of all this? During one of the commercial breaks, the first ad to air was from Ditech and started with the sentence, “People are smart…” Oy.

I don’t understand how people can be duped into such obvious scams. Hold on a second while I check my Myspace inbox. Oh, a new message. Who could this be? She says she’s Abigail.

Hi sexy!

Well, hello to you.

I've been in a relationship for the past three and half years;

Well why would you want to be e-mailing me, especially since my profile says I’m married?

it ended unexpectedly a couple of months back. I feel relieved and eager to start the dating process again.

Oh, I see. I think I know where this is going.

I'd like to meet a nice, decent, easy-going guy.

And here I thought I had a chance.

After seeing your ad page, I thought we'd almost certainly click.

Cool. She must hate Democrats, too.

A little about me: I'm cute and have a couple of private tattoos. My height and weight are proportional but I'd like to be more muscular.

That's OK. Nobody’s perfect.

I have a beaming smile, nice hair and a firm BUTT.

Now you got my attention.

I hope you'll be interested in chatting a bit. Don't be shy. FYI, I hate using this site's message center; it's not very work friendly, so don't respond directly.

Yeah, I know what you mean. This whole Myspace messaging application is the suq, even though you sent this message through Myspace.

Please send your reply to my normal address.: sternhagen_l_kate@yahoo.

 

Have a wonderful day and thank you!

No, thank you. I’m just glad you didn’t ask me to sent any money due to an inheritance you can’t get access to because the account is in Nigeria and you have bad credit over at the Dark Continent. If that were to happen, I might think this e-mail could be fake.