6:15 p.m.

 

• Well we donated blood at a local church for some kid with leukemia and afterward, Mrs. kkk fainted. This of course caused a scene much like the shit you see on any medical drama, only less intense. And with uglier nurses. Always got to cause I scene. She’ll live. What was more dramatic was when I thought there might be some trouble with the computer, only to discover I needed the mouse replaced. I’m such a techie.

 

I also took the day off work hoping to get in some good video-gaming, only to discover the better half decided to take a “me day,” too. Fuck. The only thing worse than when this happens is on Sunday when I have the football games on while doing odds ‘n ends around the house and I get to listen to her bitch “Is this all you’re going to do today?” Let’s see, what did I do yesterday while the games were on: Made 40 bottles of Crystal Light. Clipped and sorted through coupons. Did three loads of laundry. Exercised for 90 minutes. Computed the monthly budget where I document everything we spent and everything we earned. Made dinner. What did she do? Watch “Lord of the Rings.” Married life, folks. Someday this will be you typing.

 

3 p.m.

 

• So Swift Terror was bitching about the new Jew tactic teams are doing at the end of games when a field goal kicker is about to boot the pigskin and the opposing coach calls “time out.” I don’t really see the big deal. Yeah, it’s lame, but like Mr. Terror said, just wait until the “timed-out” kick goes wide right and the mulligan goes through the uprights. If the NCAA and NFL want to “ban” this, then whatever. The only thing I object to is the potential for injury when play is stopped right when the ball is snapped. Just let them play out the down and let them know a time out was called before the play. Besides, teams should know by now that the opposing coach will probably employ this strategy and just treat the whole thing as a warm-up routine. But to get “offended” over all this, which is what I’ve seen on a few ESPN/NFL pre-game shows, is just a bit too much.

 

10:30 a.m.

 

So when the baseball season began Al Keiper and I made predictions as to win totals for each baseball team. Time to see the damage. Teams in bold were correct predictions. Actual wins are in ().

 

Al kkk-eiper's picks

 

NL EAST

Philadelphia Phillies 88.5 UNDER (89)

New York Mets 88.0 OVER (88)

Atlanta Braves 81.5 OVER (84)

Washington Nationals 66.5 OVER (73)

Florida Marlins 78.5 UNDER (71)

 

NL CENTRAL

Chicago Cubs 85.5 UNDER (85)

Milwaukee Brewers 81.5 UNDER (83)

St Louis Cardinals 84.5 OVER (78)

Houston Astros 78.5 OVER (73)

Cincinnati Reds 76.5 UNDER (72)

Pittsburgh Pirates 71.5 UNDER (68)

 

NL WEST

Arizona Diamondbacks 77.5 UNDER (90)

Colorado Rockies 74.5 OVER (89)

San Diego Padres 84.0 OVER (89)

Los Angeles Dodgers 88.5 OVER (82)

San Francisco Giants 81.5 OVER (71)

 

AL EAST

Boston Red Sox 90.5 OVER (96)

New York Yankees 97.0 UNDER (94)

Toronto Blue Jays 86.5 UNDER (83)

Baltimore Orioles 73.5 UNDER (69)

Tampa Bay Devil Rays 67.0 UNDER (66)

 

AL CENTRAL

Cleveland Indians 84.5 UNDER (96)

Detroit Tigers 87.5 UNDER (88)

Minnesota Twins 83.5 UNDER (79)

Chicago White Sox 86.5 OVER (72)

Kansas City Royals 67.5 UNDER (69)

 

AL WEST

Los Angeles Angels 89.5 UNDER (94)

Seattle Mariners 75.5 UNDER (88)

Oakland Athletics 84.5 OVER (76)

Texas Rangers 81.5 UNDER (75)

 

Total Correct = 15

 

Al Keiper's picks

 

NL EAST

New York Mets 88.0 OVER (88)

Atlanta Braves 81.5 OVER (84)

Philadelphia Phillies 88.5 UNDER (89)

Florida Marlins 78.5 UNDER (71)

Washington Nationals 66.5 UNDER (73)

 

NL CENTRAL

Chicago Cubs 85.5 UNDER (85)

Milwaukee Brewers 81.5 OVER (83)

St Louis Cardinals 84.5 OVER (78)

Houston Astros 78.5 UNDER (73)

Cincinnati Reds 76.5 OVER (72)

Pittsburgh Pirates 71.5 OVER (68)

 

NL WEST

Arizona Diamondbacks 77.5 OVER (90)

Colorado Rockies 74.5 OVER (89)

San Diego Padres 84.0 UNDER (89)

Los Angeles Dodgers 88.5 UNDER (82)

San Francisco Giants 81.5 UNDER (71)

 

AL EAST

Boston Red Sox 90.5 OVER (96)

New York Yankees 97.0 UNDER (94)

Toronto Blue Jays 86.5 UNDER (83)

Baltimore Orioles 73.5 OVER (69)

Tampa Bay Devil Rays 67.0 OVER (66)

 

AL CENTRAL

Cleveland Indians 84.5 OVER (96)

Detroit Tigers 87.5 UNDER (88)

Minnesota Twins 83.5 OVER (79)

Chicago White Sox 86.5 UNDER (72)

Kansas City Royals 67.5 OVER (69)

 

AL WEST

Los Angeles Angels 89.5 OVER (94)

Seattle Mariners 75.5 UNDER (88)

Oakland Athletics 84.5 OVER (76)

Texas Rangers 81.5 OVER (75)

 

Total Picks = 16

 

 

Now I guess I could say that if I would have gotten just one of the 15 incorrect picks right, then I would have tied our board's baseball expert, but I'd rather make it sound more dramatic. If the Phillies would have lost just one more game we would have tied! Yeah, that sounds much better than pointing out some of my gems:

 

Arizona Diamondbacks 77.5 UNDER (90)

Cleveland Indians 84.5 UNDER (96)

Chicago White Sox 86.5 OVER (72)

Seattle Mariners 75.5 UNDER (88)