10:30 p.m.

• More wedded bliss. From a conversation with the better half today (she took the day off work). You can figure out who is who.

“How was work?”

“It was work. How was your day.”

”Oh I had an emotional breakdown while eating my Boo Berry.”

“Uh-huh. An emotional breakdown over what?”

”I don’t know.”

“OK then.”

Oddly enough, her monthly visitor is due next week. Christ almighty I couldn’t imagine being a chick. The last time I had an emotional breakdown Barry Bonds was unable to throw out Sid Bream at the plate.

• Speaking of work, it turns out we’re hiring some chick who fits the perfect description of being an officer employee at my place. Low self-esteem, no prospects, willing to get the life sucked out of her little by little day by day. Actually, she didn’t get hired for the job we were advertising for. That job is going to go to another co-worker who is pretty much doing the job of three people (at least). Long story short, there are three of us who do our job while everyone else slacks off or are completely fucking clueless and criminal. I’m one of the three. My co-worker who is in the office next to me is the second. The person getting shifted over to a new position is the third. Turns out this newly hired person may be getting more than the $8/hour originally planned because management is telling the current employee getting shifted over that she’ll be getting a SUBSTANTIAL RAISE when reviews are done. There’s one little catch: WE DON’T HAVE REVIEWS! We get some gay-ass “cost of living” thing at the start of each year. There is no “review.” You know, sometimes you can evaluate yourself by the company you keep. However, I like to also think you can do the same thing by looking at who views you as an enemy/threat.

Another work story, sort of. My co-worker and I were talking this morning, and the subject of my animal-loving wackiness was brought up. He called me an animal-rights wacko because I was going off on some children < pets rant. I disagreed with his assessment, primarily because an animal-rights wacko thinks animals are on the same level as people. I disagree. My cats aren’t as “equal” as me. In fact, they are vastly inferior, which is why they need my protection. However, I will say that they provide more to society than many people, particularly my crack-whore sister-in-law and the out-of-control niece. For example, my three kids

1) Provide companionship.

2) Squash bugs.

3) Let us know someone is at the door because they run away and hide.

4) Serve as an alarm clock because if they don’t get fed by 5:30-6 a.m. they wake us up, or at least they wake up Mrs. kkk. This has actually kept us from being late for work a number of times.

I just named four things Dessa, JJ and Max do to earn their keep. I can’t think of one thing my two relatives mentioned above have done for the greater good. Let’s see, they:

1) Don’t work.

2) Collect welfare.

3) Use emergency services for drug overdoses that are nothing more than attempts to get attention.

4) Get free government health care for conditions caused by drug and alcohol abuse.

And if a dog/cat gets put in a shelter they only have a week to be adopted before getting the needle, but yet we have an “affordable housing crisis” for our underclass. Put the pets in the shelters and gas those living off the public dole.

8:45 p.m.

• Damn you Bush economy. And here I thought living paycheck to paycheck was supposed to be fun.

The calculus of living paycheck to paycheck in America is getting harder. What used to last four days might last half that long now. Pay the gas bill, but skip breakfast. Eat less for lunch so the kids can have a healthy dinner.

 

Across the nation, Americans are increasingly unable to stretch their dollars to the next payday as they juggle higher rent, food and energy bills. It's starting to affect middle-income working families as well as the poor, and has reached the point of affecting day-to-day calculations of merchants like Wal-Mart Stores Inc., 7-Eleven Inc. and Family Dollar Stores Inc.

 

Food pantries, which distribute foodstuffs to the needy, are reporting severe shortages and reduced government funding at the very time that they are seeing a surge of new people seeking their help.

 

While economists debate whether the country is headed for a recession, some say the financial stress is already the worst since the last downturn at the start of this decade.

 

From Family Dollar to Wal-Mart, merchants have adjusted their product mix and pricing accordingly. Sales data show a marked and more prolonged drop in spending in the days before shoppers get their paychecks, when they buy only the barest essentials before splurging around payday.

Wait, what-?

And 7-Eleven says its grocery sales have jumped 12-13 percent over the past year, compared with only slight increases for non-necessities like gloves and toys. Shoppers can't afford to load up at the supermarket and are going to the most convenient places to buy emergency food items like milk and eggs.

So people living paycheck to paycheck can’t afford the super market food and buy from CONVENIENCE STORES?

Coupon-clipping just isn't enough.

Speak for yourself. This week’s grocery bill went from $80 down to $50 thanks to my Jew eye. Actually, I did a little number-crunching regarding last month’s household budget. There were several expenses that were non-regular or unexpected [$400 car insurance premium, JJ’s $100 trip to the vet for his acne(!), local taxes ($100), job interview and other clothes ($300), family cookout ($100), etc.] and with this $1,000 in unexpected expenses, we still managed to be $200 in the black for the month. I went and calculated all the money we saved on food and clothes thanks to coupons and sales, and that total came to just under $600. And we didn’t buy milk or eggs at the Quickie Mart.