8/7: Dino-Fight
7 p.m.
• So on Tuesday I was changing the litter boxes and had this “Jurassic Fight Club” show on the History Channel. So what was the matchup – A T-Rex vs. Triceratops, where my three-horned gangsta would fuck up the world’s uber-predator?
No.
An Allosaurus thinking a nearby Apatosaurus would make an easy dinner, only to realize that this four-legged behemoth would just fall on the carnivore and crush him or drown the meanie if there was some water nearby?
Not even close.
So what was this week’s fight of the week? Finding out who KILLED A T-REX! OK, so there was a bigger dog in the yard, like that abortion called Jurassic Park 3?
Tyrannosaurus Rex was the most feared predator on earth, but to one particular dinosaur, he was prey. A discovery in Montana reveals the broken and fractured bones of a juvenile T-Rex, and the teeth of its attacker. Experts measuring the size and shape of the teeth are able to identify the attacker as Nanotyrannus. As more bones emerged, paleontologists get an unprecedented look into 65 million year old battle and help answer questions about the origin of Nanotyrannus, the “Tiny Tyrant”.
It was some carnivore that attacked juvenile T-Rexes. Gay. Oh, and next week the fight club will be a bunch of raptors “gang killing” some herbivore. Bullshit.
Give me an Ankylosaurus cracking the skull of Gorgosaurus. (To this show's credit, something similar will be coming up.)
Give me a Stegasaurs getting its pea-brain pwned by something higher up on the food chain. (To this guy's credit, he seems to be holding his own quite well.)
Give me some horny Hadrosaurs thinking with their little heads and brawling over which one gets to bang the female lizard with the big duck bill.
Yeah, a bunch of raptor things killing some big dumb herbivore. I haven’t seen that before.