• So I was flipping through the classifieds (gotta see what's out there in the free market) and I noticed about a dozen ads announcing their job vacancies (mostly crappy administrative positions) next to a picture of a football followed by the phrase "Go Steelers." Why in the blue hell would I want to work for a place just because they have a "Go Steelers" line in their classified ad? Sure the hours are long and the pay is terrible, but we're "Stiller" fans, come work for us. This is almost as bad as the ad I saw one time which had a picture of Mr. Peanut and the caption “We’re going nuts trying to find the right candidates.”

• Those wacky "God Hates Fags" people. Now I can understand them picketing the funeral of someone like Matthew Shepard -- after all he was gay and was causing quite a stir by laying in that casket all gay-like. But I'm still trying to figure out what the problem is with miners from West Virginia. After reading this flyer I can only conclude that fag = Baptists or people from West Virginia. Maybe these “God Hates Fags” people heard that these miners went deep into black holes for a living.

• Bad news for Medium-Large Media: The N.Y. Times reported profits were down 41 percent in quarterly net earnings from this time last year. The reason for the dip in profits, we are told, was due to having to pay-off a bunch of people time Times laid off in the quest to make more money for their fat-cat executives. Since I have no reason to question the "Paper of Record," I'll take them at their word. But please, try to stay Medium-Large for the time being. I haven't used the term "Big Media" for some time now because, well, Big Media (N.Y. Times/Washington Post/Network News/etc.) aren't that Big nowadays. I hope I don't have to downsize them any more in the near future.

And while Medium-Large Media is shrinking, what exactly is the proper term for Big Oil now? I mean, they made record profits thanks to Cheney, Halliburton and friends, so should they now be called Mega Oil? Ultra Oil? Super-Sized Oil?

• I can't stand reality shows, and I loathe "Survivor." However, I do admit to watching Season 1's finale because I heard Rudy, the old guy, was a grumpy old man, and I have a soft spot in my heart for that type of senior citizen, seeing how I'll probably end up like that if cancer or road rage don't claim me first. Anyway, the winner of that first "Survivor" was a bearded fellow named Richard Hatch, who is best known for walking around the set naked and being a overall bastard in order to win the show's $1 million prize. Apparently, Hatch didn't realize that winning a million dollars doesn't mean you actually win a million dollars. You have to give Uncle Sam his cut, which Hatch didn't. Now he's got to pay the piper. With the possibility of facing jail time, I might be tempted to watch a reality show of Hatch living in the big house -- well, except for the shower scenes because 1) I've already watched enough episodes of "Oz" to know what happens when you drop the soap in a place like that, and 2) If I want to watch sex on TV, I'll just tune into MTV's "The Real World."

• I do have to give the Palestinians credit for one thing. Besides blowing themselves up real good, they also go out and vote in their elections. A 77 percent turnout for a bunch of unemployed, oppressed refugees; that’s got to be every Democrat politician’s wet dream. I haven’t been keeping track of what candidates were supposed to win, but it appears that Hamas representatives did better than expected. It must have been because their “No Jew Left Behind” plan was a hit with the voters.