• In our household we have three kids: Dessa, JJ, and Max. You were expecting actual children?

We used to have dry kibble available for them to eat at any time, but JJ would always overeat and throw up about half of what he consumed. We’ve had JJ since March of 2001, and every day when we got home from work there would always be piles of vomit on the floor. For years I told the better half we needed to regulate how much they ate, but she never wanted to because Dessa is a “grazer,” meaning she would eat a small amount of food several times throughout the day. Well a few months ago I managed to convince the better half to regulate their feedings. Actually, I think JJ did most of the convincing by throwing up on our bed, which had on it a comforter fresh out of the washing machine.

After a two-week period of limiting what all three of them could eat, there were zero vomit spots on the carpet, and ever since then we’ve been regulating their feeding times. What we do is give them food three times a day: when we wake up at 5:30 a.m., when we get home from work at around 4 p.m. and when we go to bed, which is usually around 9 p.m.

Although there is the occasional vomit pile, these incidents have been greatly reduced. However, this creates another problem. When we are asleep, sometimes JJ wants to be fed and begins scratching a nearby closet, which can get annoying at 3-4 a.m. I keep a squirt bottle on my nightstand and usually a few shots in the direction of the noise solves the problem. But this isn’t always the case, such as what happened last night. When the better half moves my squirt bottle, or if I’m just not in the mood, I’ll get up and trudge over to their feeding area. This brings JJ to the scene, and I’ll scoop him up, take him to the basement stairs, put him down, and lock the door. Sure he cries and scratches that door trying to get out, but the noise isn’t as loud and I can go back to sleep.

The funny thing about last night’s episode is that their current stash of dry food is running low, and I bought an 18-pound back of Meow Mix earlier this week. That bag is lying in the middle of the basement floor. If JJ had any sense he would have went down the steps, opened the bag with his claws and eaten as much as he desired. But sadly he’s not the brightest bulb in the socket.

• When it comes to politics, there are a lot of things that annoy me. One is when the losing side of an election or referendum tells the other side what they should do in regards to policy. This happens quite a bit in regards to newspaper editorial boards. A newspaper publication that has ragged on a particular candidate during an election season suddenly decides it’s important to give this same person “advice” on what they should do in office. Let’s see, the candidate doesn’t agree with anything your editorial board champions and didn’t have your endorsement during the campaign season – now he or she is supposed to take anything you say or recommend seriously? Ha.

But it’s not just newspapers where this sort of thing happens. This afternoon, I was channel surfing and came across a cable news show that had a Democrat and a Republican strategist on talking about whether or not Senate Democrats should try and filibuster the upcoming Alito vote. After the Democrat said his bit, the Republican began suggesting what he thinks Democrats should do, which largely consisted of not going through with the filibuster attempt.

What are you thinking, douche? Don’t tell these people that they are being extreme and look like a bunch of unhinged kooks. Keep your mouth shut and let Ted Kennedy and pals continue to make asses of themselves. This isn’t the 1980s where a “Robert Bork’s America” speech will go unchallenged by an alternative media. Sit back, let the libs try to block Alito’s vote, have RIGHT-WING RADIO and company mock them and reap the rewards at the ’06 ballot box. Believe me, you guys will need all the help you can get for this next election.