Leelee's Blog.

Speaking of sprained ankles, I've sprained both my ankles over quite a bit from basketball. My left one moreso than my right. My left ankle now makes a snapping noise when I go up steps or if I rotate it in certain ways. If I go up too many steps, it starts to flare up and get sore. Sometimes the soreness doesn't go away for a day or two. A doctor told me that one of my many sprains tore a ligament which didn't heal properly and the snapping noise (sounds like a stick breaking) is part of my ligament snapping over the bone.

 

So yeah, sprained ankles suck ass.

I know. But, sometimes, it's hard to get me to believe that. When you have TWO sets of parents that basically disowned you, one of which who enjoyed making me feel miserable... it's hard to believe in people. If your own family hates you, why should anyone else be better? But, whatevz. Family talk gets me so fucking pissed.

 

I can't particularally say that I know where you are coming from, or even understand the pain you've experienced.

 

The world is full of suffering, but it's also filled with overcoming it.

 

That's one of my favorite quotes.

 

I've been through a lot of hardships in my short existence. Many have been personality altering events, and some were close to making me call it quits for good. But, through it all, I overcame it. It's human nature to adapt to hard ships, and carry on living. Sure, things may have been painful then, but that's then, this is now. I always look towards what the future brings me, and it's nothing but opportunities awaiting. Yes, I amgetting medically discharged from the Marine Corps. Yes, that sucks, but, it means I get to go out and explore the world with a new outlook on life, and go to college, which is something I've wanted, but never had the guts to do, until now. Another example, my ex-girlfriends and I failed relationship. Yes, it hurt, and yes, it sucked her having a mis-carriage after six months of pregnancy. Yes, it especially was hurtful when she and her entire family blamed me. It rocked my world. Losing the girl I considered my first, and only love AND having her accuse me of murdering our unborn child crippled my every emotion. I'm not going to try and feed you a crock of shit here, it still bothers me today. But, I remain focused, and pay attention to my future, because apparently I wasn't supposed to have a child yet, or be married yet. I am a firm believer in fate.

 

Don't let some horrible influences in your life cripple you. You're young, smart, attractive, and has a lot to offer to someone, and especially to yourself. Everyone is capable of doing great things, and being happy, don't fight yourself, just let it happen.

 

About 6 years ago. Right before my senior year of tennis, which really fucking sucked. Gave me some hard lessons about life, and who your true friends are, though... so, I consider it worth it.

 

It doesn't bother me much, anymore. Although, the flexibility of my foot isn't the same. Mostly, the problems were mental. I was afraid to put all my weight on it for a couple years. And sprained ankles... I think I've sprained my right one at least 10 times. It got to the point where it barely bothered me when it happened. I wish I wasn't so damn clumsy and uncoordinated.

 

Injuries suck. If you've happend to read my blog, you'll see what I am talking about. I just gotta be careful, you know ?

 

As for your ankle, that really blows. There's other ways to know your true friends than extreme pain, or at least, I think so.

 

I've always thought the same thing about injuries. It's all mental. The human mind is a very, very powerful thing. People often underestimate it. Like for example, I have a rather large, and noticible scar on my left forearm. I used to be a cook for six years, and the man who trained me had been through some horrific accidents, and injuries. It's a miracle he is still able to walk. Anyway, he flat out told me "Sean, you are going to get burnt when you are working in this kitchen. It's going to hurt, but you don't have time to worry about that, your focus should be clearing the ticket wheel, making the customers happy, and helping your mother keep the restaurant open." Sure enough, I got burnt. It was tremendously painful. A 100 pound grill scrapper fell on my arm, and it burnt through about an inch and a half of my arm. It was quite gruesome. But, I remembered what he had said to me, I focused, not on the pain, but something else, I cant remember what right now, but it was something that puts me in a euphoric type feeling, like a nice warm shower. I turned off the pain switch. And ever since that time, I've been able to do it, like breaking my arm and leg since joining the Corps, slipping a disc in my back, having a slight heartattack a month ago, etcetera.

 

Whew. Sorry for such the long reply, and personal stories and such.

I'm very anti-social and hate the crowd atmosphere too.