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5/15: Poster Lists, Workday Gridlock

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kkktookmybabyaway

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• Since message boards and blogs were meant for stupid lists of “favorite” and “not-so-favorite” things, coming soon will be KKK’s Top 103 Posters. A list so exciting, so heart-stopping, so utterly magnificent in production value that you will tune in two, or maybe even three, times to relive the drama and intrigue over and over and over again. Well, maybe not three “overs” because that would mean you tuned in four times … eh, you get the idea.

 

• All I can say is thank God for vacation time/sick days. This morning as I was getting ready for work I was thinking to myself, “Do you really have to do this today?” Of course this week I have a lot of projects due, but I’m one of those saps that likes to get things done ahead of time so I don’t end up running around like a chicken with its head cut off at the last minute trying to get a bunch of pisspoor work turned in. In addition, I get a certain amount of vacation days per year, and they have to be used up by December 31 or else I lose them. Now while many people at my place of employment choose to use a bunch up for a week or two off, I prefer to spread mine around. After all, why take a week off when you’ll end up having to work twice as hard for a week once you get back to work and have finish up the stack of assignments that were put on your desk while you were out and about? But I digress.

 

As I was making my morning commute I was right on schedule at around the 10- to 15-minute mark of my daily workweek drive. However, that’s when everything came to a literal grinding halt. I take Route 30 West, which passes by an Interstate Highway. I don’t go on I-376 West but it’s a nice marker to gauge my commute time. Well, about several miles before the Interstate exit, traffic was at a standstill in a place where it shouldn’t be. With the pouring rain, the better half and I figured this gridlock was probably due to an accident. The time was 6:15 a.m.; we were running a little behind schedule, but nothing serious. The time then became 6:20, then 6:30, then 6:40, and we haven’t moved an inch. Well, to be fair, we did move up a little bit, but that was because motorists in front of me were turning around and driving away. In addition, I was looking a few traffic lights down at this big white truck and noticed that during all this time it hadn’t moved an inch due to the traffic. It was now 6:55 and there was no sign of any vehicles in front of me moving forward. In addition, the traffic reports from a variety of radio stations weren’t mentioning anything about this backup, probably because it wasn’t on an Interstate – damn liberal media bias. Anyway, as a few more vehicles did U-Turns and high-tailed it out of there I was faced with a dilemma: Stay the course or turn around. The reason this became an issue was because if I were to move up I’d be away from the four-way intersection I was next to and unable to turn around if I felt like doing so. I figured it’s days like this that vacation days are made for, I turned around and headed back home. As I was driving back I took a look at the traffic that accumulated behind me up since I began waiting, and quite a lot of fossil fuel was wasted on this day.

 

Another reason I decided to stay home was that an additional accident took place on a road that I have to take to get to work. For those familiar with the Shittsburgh, area, an accident on the Fort Pitt Bridge was bringing outbound traffic to a standstill, and this accident was first reported at 6:30. By 8 a.m. it still hadn’t cleared and traffic was limited to just one lane. Sometimes the Gods make it apparent they don’t want you to work on a certain day, and who am I to question them?

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How ironic, I took the day off as well. I really didn't have to do anything today because like an idiot I went ahead and finished it saturday. I'm actually 3 days ahead of schedule, which is good because I also told my newly formed crew (which was easier to form then expected, as I just hired 4 old employees that our company laid off a couple years ago, they already know what to do and the policy and that bullshit) to take the day off as well. No sense in wasting valuable company time and manpower, I look like a nice boss when im really just too lazy to come in.

 

What did i do? I ate lunch with my ex's sister at a chinese buffet and watched parts of Arrested Development Season 2. I really didn't take advantage, did i?

 

 

 

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Are the people you're bringing back going to work at a reduced rate from what they earned before getting canned?

 

And tomorrow should be interesting. My one idiot boss should be back from a weeklong vacation and his workplace mantra is, "Well that's what the last minute is for." Thank God I work two floors away from just about everyone else.

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