Thoth

We return to SWF Storm, immediately turning our attention to the announce desk and the Pernicious Pairing of Cyclone Comet and Bobby Riley! Once the two men being speaking however, the graphics on the screen change, showing two rather familiar profiles in front of a VERY familiar fortification... Comet initiates tonight's festivities... "At Ashes 2 Ashes, these men will meet one more time, to settle once and for all the issues between them! 'Grand Slam' Mark Stevens! The Suicide King! Hell in a Cell!" "Tonight's retrospective picks up roughly a month and a half after last week's." Riley continues. "The King of Hearts went on to represent his bracket at Genesis 2, facing Neilsen of the Jungle, Axis, Stubby McWeed, then champion Chris Wilson, and future Champion El Luchadore Magnifico! Though he fell short that evening, everyone saw what King brought to the table and he was quickly pencilled in to be Magnifico's first main event challenger at Dissention!" "The month intervening saw King rise to become the dominant force in the federation." Comet nods. "He only lost one match on eight shows that entire month, and beat numerous challengers including a decisive victory over BOTH the Hville Thugg (then the ICTV champ) and Magnifico in a handicap match! All signs pointed to an epic confrontation at Dissention, and we were right... just not the way we thought." Riley snorts out loud in an amused fashion. "Not the way you thought, maybe. At Dissention, Magnifico represented Wilson's brainchild, the IGNWO. King we assumed represented his, the Midnight Carnival. Those two men tore the house down in an epic two out of three falls match that saw Magnifico edge out King by the slimmest of margins. However, it turns out that that was only the beginning. As the match ended the IGNWO approached the ring, prompting the Carnival to do the same. A lengthy staredown ensued and hostilities were clearly imminent... but King, master statesman that he is, calmed the atmosphere by stepping forward to shake Magnifico's hand! King then went to Wilson and shook his hand as well, and ordered the Carnival to stand down. Confused but still possessing unshakable faith in their leader, the Carnies complied. King suddenly weakened then, and his mentor Mark Stevens went over to support him and help escort him from the ring." "And that of course, is when everything went to hell." Comet notes reproachfully. "Out of nowhere, King nailed Stevens with a Jokers Wild! The IGNWO fell on the confused and shaken Carnies like lightning from on high, leaving them all laying in the middle of the ring. Wilson's little Meat Factory-" "Language!" "Fine. The IGNWO was left laughing in the ring with a man we thought we knew, and that was where the aptly title Dissention ended. It was the most shocking betrayal since Pimp Daddy Sarp turned on Rane and the Phoenix Uprising, and in some people's mind it far eclipsed that!" "It was masterful to be sure," Riley says approvingly. "This retrospective picks up at the first Storm after the PPV. In it we learn King's motivations in the introductory promo and we see King tangle with the man he 'betrayed' at Dissention in the main event of that show!" ------------------------------------------------------------- A low wind is heard blowing through the arena and is felt as well. Then, out of nowhere, an image of lightning strikes the ring, and thunder is heard blasting in the arena. Then, rain begins to fall in front of the IGNtron onto the stage and through the stage holes. Meanwhile, many sounds of a storm are heard. Custom rock music blasts through the speakers and the Storm logo is seen on the IGNtron, seemingly emerging from within. The crowd cheers wildly and as the camera pans around the arena. “And welcome to IGNWF Storm, coming to you live from the Ice Palace in Tampa Bay!” Curry yells out. “We are fresh off the heels of Dissention, which turned out to be a much more accurate name than anyone could have predicted!’ “That’s right Curry!” NTD agrees. “Tonight we have some great matches for you! The newly returned Perfect Bo will be taking on the only man in the league who is larger and angrier than him, the Hville Thugg! The newly crowned tag champs of Rotten and Andrea Montgomery have their work cut out for them as well as they have to face off against the World Champ Magnifico and the number one competitor Chris Wilson!” “But of course the subject on everyone’s minds is the King of Hearts and his shocking betrayal at Dissention mere moments after losing to Magnifico… has King joined the IGNWO? Was it a fit of pique? Is the Carnival over? We don’t know the answers yet, but I bet you that before the night is out we’ll know for sure!” The arena suddenly blackens as a female voice sings out… “Ah… ah.ah… ah… ah.ah… ah…” “I am the king of this city, top down, windows down, puffing like diddy…” Fog fills the entrance way as a red light pulses…”Summer in the City” continues to play as the crowd universally gets to their feet and begins to jeer their hearts out. Curry says, “And here come the IGNWO! Maybe they’ll have some of the answers we’re looking for!” A few moments pass, just long enough for the entry way to completely fill with smog… before Chris Wilson, El Luchador Magnifico, and the Hville Thugg emerge from the smoke and the crowd redouble their boos. Wilson looks unusually chipper, not unlike the cat who has finally eaten that damned canary… NTD notes, “The evil genius looks pleased, and who’s to say that he shouldn’t? Every member of the IGNWO won last night, and he finally dealt the Carnival a deathblow!!” Curry scowls. “That remains to be seen, NTD.” The trio of heels makes their way to the stage, each entering the ring in his own unique fashion. Quickly getting to their feet (except Thugg, who is SLOW) the NWOers take a moment to bask in the hatred of the crowd, before Wilson signals to a stagehand for a microphone… “Well hello, everyone? How did you like Dissention?” Wilson mocks as the crowd responds with an avalanche of anger. “I know I liked it. Everything worked perfectly. Thugg beat Axis and Storm senseless one more time… I gave Bo the welcome back that he deserved… and Magnifico managed to retain his title.” Magnifico gives a curt nod at that, displaying his belt for all to see… a chorus of boos erupts. “But that wasn’t the best part of Dissention… oh no. The best part wasn’t even my capturing the number one competitorship to the belt my esteemed Mexican colleague holds!” Curry notes as Wilson pauses, “Maybe so smart guy, but can the IGNWO survive the two of you going after the belt?” Wilson continues, “No, the best part was the final accomplishment of the evening… a plan so complicated, so secret that I only shared it with one other person, namely Thugg! A plan that accomplished what no one else ever could… the destruction of the Midnight Carnival! And to top it all off, not only did it destroy the Carnies but it made the IGNWO even stronger…” Curry gasps. “He can’t mean…” “LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, I GIVE TO YOU THE NEWEST MEMBER OF THE IGNWO… THE SUICIDE KING!!!!” The crowd erupts into a biblical display of heat, half in anger, half in dismay… The arena goes black as the voice of Ozzy Ozborne screams out, "ALL ABOARD!! AH HAH HAH HAH!!" The stage suddenly explodes as a wall of crimson pyro shoots skyward, deafening and blinding those closest. When the pyro finishes the wailing guitar chords of Ozzy Ozborne's "Crazy Train" pick up in volume and the Suicide King is revealed, posing cockily as the crowds pours their derision down on him. As he approaches the ring it becomes clear that for some reason his left hand and fingers are heavily taped up… still smiling like the devil himself, the King saunters down to the ring, quickly sliding under the ring ropes and coming to stand before Chris Wilson himself as ELM glowers from the corner. The two men look at each other for a long moment… before sharing a firm handshake, and the crowd somehow manages to generate yet more heat!!! Wilson quickly points at King’s injured hand, but the pretty boy just shrugs it off, and gestures for the microphone… The King brushes the hair out of his eyes and turns in place, regarding his adoring fans as they boo their hearts out… “Hello, Tampa Bay!!!! I know that you all are worried about one thing right now… How is the King’s hand? Will he be ok?” Curry sardonically notes, “Somehow I doubt that is what’s on everyone’s minds.” “Don’t worry kids, just a mild mishap. At the post-Dissention party with Wilson and Thugg, I had a little too much to drink and managed to slam my hand in the car door! Nothing serious, just some tenderness. I promise it won’t prevent yours truly from continuing his domination of the main event!!!” The King giggles mildly as he notes that Magnifico is still glaring death at him from across the ring. “In any event, there’s a little business to get out of the way first. First!! To reflect the new me and my new friends, and more importantly to take back the name that was always properly mine, you may all call me the Suicide King from now on!!! Now that that loser Suicide is gone…” Curry yells out, “Show some respect for the dead, you cretin!” The King continues, “I can take back the first thing that is rightfully mine, my name! But don’t worry ladies… you can ALWAYS call me the King of Hearts!” The King smirks broadly as the boos rain down, interspersed with the occasional female squeal. “Next… everyone is asking me why… Why turn your back on the Carnival? Why join the IGNWO? Well, to answer your question, I didn’t turn my back on the Carnival, they turned their backs on me!!!!” NTD marks out, “Preach it, Kingy!” The crowd obviously is rather partisan toward the Carnival… “No, it’s true! Really! When the Carnival was first formed up here, I made it my personal responsibility to make sure that every Carny got their chance at greatness, selflessly sacrificing my own time! I’m the reason the Carnies were the most dominant stable of all time… until now. “ The Suicide King grins at Wilson who responds with a relatively good-natured smile. “I single-handedly led them, practically spoon fed them their belts! MacPhisto? US and ICTV belts, because of me! Sarah? HCG, ‘cause of me!! Raynor? Tag belts and the ICTV because of ME! Stevens? Without me, there’d be no ‘myth’ of Grand Slam’s greatness, because you all would know him as the joke I know him to be!!” Curry swears into his microphone, “Now that is just too much!” “And what did I get for my selflessness, for my pain? Nothing!! Absolutely nothing! I was so busy coddling these do-nothings that my own career suffered! I languished in the lower card while all my so-called friends had title shot after title shot… but then, I got my chance. I got my opportunity against the best wrestlers in the league today, the IGNWO. And I showed them, and you, EXACTLY what the Suicide King could do!! I finally had my shot, my chance for greatness, and how did my jealous, envious, so-called friends respond?!” King’s voice changes to a mocking high-pitched squeal… “King, my slut of a girlfriend’s pregnant. King, my poor foot is injured and I need therapy. King, I’m gonna go play pool with Anarchy ‘cause they’re the only people I can win against. King, my tag partner wants to hit me in the head with a chair…” “Do you see? Do you see?! My chance for greatness and they tried to drag me down with their petty little useless problems!!” The crowd boos in earnest now… Curry says, “You were their leader! They thought they could trust you!” “Well, I was tired of the lack of support. I was tired of their jealousy, their inability to let me rise as far as I let them rise… I knew I couldn’t’ count on them, so I had to find people I could count on. People who would be happy to have the most charismatic and handsome wrestler in the business today!! People who would support me and let me rise to the very top! And when I approached Chris Wilson to join the IGNWO, he was very receptive and understanding of my needs… and all I had to do was pay a teeny, tiny, almost insignificant price…” “And that would be…?” Curry asks hesitantly. “First, I had to take out Stevens myself as a show of loyalty, which I did HAPPILY. Getting the other Carnies was icing on the cake.” Yet again another volley of boos hits the stage like an artillery barrage. “Second though, I had to show that I had what it takes. I had to show that I was willing to help out where I could. So at Wilson’s request, I THREW THE TITLE MATCH AT DISSENTION!!!!!” “WHAT?!” Curry screams out as a thousand fans yell in disbelief. ‘You lost your chance at the IGNWF Heavyweight belt on purpose??!!?!” Magnifico looks righteously pissed, eyes glancing back and forth between Wilson and the King, each of whom look back at him with a steely gaze. ELM yells, clearly displeased about being kept out of the loop on this one… Thugg holds him back with one massive paw, keeping him from charging Wilson and King in unwise anger. “I don’t know why he wanted me to throw the match, but I had no problem with it. I’ve beaten you so many times Magnifico it doesn’t even matter if I have the belt! Everyone knows I’m better than you, anyway.” Even the Thugg can barely restrain ELM as he froths at the mouth, trying to shut the Suicide King’s impudent yap. “All I can figure is that he wanted to take the belt off you himself… either way, I’ll get another shot, sooner than you think Magnifico… and when I do, this time I won’t stack the deck against me!” Curry screams into the microphone, “I knew it! The IGNWO is coming apart at the seams from the dueling egos! What does King want? What does Wilson have planned? Is Magnifico a member or a patsy to Wilson’s ambition?” The IGNWOers squabble in the ring as the King continues to bait ELM, with Wilson watching on in something that might be approval or something that might be a calculating appraisal… when… **CRACK** And the fans explode!!! Curry yells out, “It’s the Heavy Hitter! Stevens is here to get some answers from his one-time friend!” NTD notes, “Thank goodness! A common enemy the IGNWO can fight… at least they’ll stop fighting each other!” “Grand Slam” Mark Stevens steps out under the IGNtron, his normally serious expression clouded over with anger and betrayal… the Suicide King turns to regard him, one lip raised in a cocky sneer as he regards his one-time trainer and friend… Stevens looks at the ring, one hand raising a microphone to his lips… “How could you do it King? You built the Carnival from nothing, and you turn your back on us like this? For the IGNWO? That’s bad comedy… you say that we kept you down, and you expect to go anywhere with Chris Wilson?” Curry notes, “A good point there from Stevens!” Mark continues, “You turned your back on everything that made you great, King. Your friends. The fans. And me. I trained you back in TWA when no one else would! When everyone else said you’d never amount to anything in the business, I defended you! And how do you repay me? With a Jokers Wild in the middle of the ring!” King nods, grinning in the middle of the ring as the fans jeer… “Well, fine. You’re a big boy now, you can make your own mistakes… and I’m gonna help you make another one tonight. I want you in a match, tonight! Let’s see if the Suicide King can really step up to the plate, or if he’s all talk after all!” The fans scream their approval out loud! The King looks around, shocked and more than a little dismayed… he shares words with Wilson quickly, but the microphone doesn’t quite pick up what they’re saying. The King nods and looks up… “You want a match? YOU GOT IT! You and me, one on one, tonight! But I don’t trust you Stevens… you’ve worked too hard and too long to keep me down. So the only way we’re having this match is if it’s NO INTERFERENCE!! I don’t want any of the Carnies coming down to save your ass!!” Stevens nods briskly, clearly accepting the terms. The fans explode into life at the prospect of the former best friends going at it!! King pauses for a moment. “Oh, and Stevens? You’re a gentleman, so how about a gentlemen’s agreement? You leave my sore hand alone...” King holds up his heavily taped left hand. “And I leave your bad knee alone. Fair?” Stevens responds quite clearly after taking a moment to regard his perennially bad knee encased in its brace, “Fair. But I’ve got my eye on you Brian… don’t think I won’t be ready for any tricks. I taught you everything you know, but I didn’t teach you everything I know!” With that, “Grand Slam” throws down the microphone and storms backstage, leaving the IGNWO alone in the ring… Curry exclaims, “Yowza! What a main event we have planned for tonight! Stevens and the King go at it in a No Interference match for much, much more than pride!!!” NTD continues, “But coming up next we have US champ Thoth and a mystery partner facing impressive newcomer Kaimen Roja, and a mystery partner of his own! IGNWF Storm continues, right after this!” --------------------- As we come back from commercial break we instantly find ourselves back at the announce desk with the Dubious Duo of IGNWF announcing, NTD and Curry Man! Each man is near breathless from announcing the great night of action that these lucky Floridians have been able to witness... Curry starts, "And we're back! For those of you who stepped away for a mere moment, you just missed the tag champs tangle with the World Champ and the number one competitor, namely, Magnifico and Wilson!" "And where were you, and what was so important that you missed that stellar match?" NTD demands. "...Right. Anyway, we've finally arrived at our main event for the evening. Dissention was aptly named as old alliances were destroyed and new alliances formed, all in the space of one evening! Of course the most notable change had to be-" NTD interrupts, "The Suicide King dumping the zeroes and getting with heroes! The Heartbreaker himself finally ditched those ungrateful Carnies and got with the winning team of the IGNWO!" Curry shakes his head, "I suppose that's one way of looking at it. Another might be that the King orchestrated the most shocking betrayal of confidence since PDS turned his back on the Phoenix Uprising!" "The Suicide King's name can now be mentioned with the best!" NTD squeals. "In any event, Mark Stevens understandably took exception to the King's little Benedict Arnold impersonation and challenged King to a match earlier tonight!" Curry recalls. "The King accepted, making it a no interference contest. I think that's a bad call by the King there NTD... no way I would want to be trapped in the ring with an angry Grand Slam and no back up!" "You don't understand, you fool face play-by-play commentator! Sure as I don't wear pants, the King has got something to prove! He's got to show the IGNWO that he has what it takes to be a true, proper bad guy!" "Oh?" Curry asks. "Then why makes the gentlemen's agreement preventing Stevens from focusing on his hand? Sounds sort of cowardly to me." "Bah." NTD sighs. "I told you you wouldn't understand... just last show you were rooting for the King!" 'That was before I found out he was a sniveling, cowardly, treacherous little egomaniac!!" "Details, details." Curry sighs... "In any event we are at go time! Can the King make it two in a row over the man who trained him, who supported him, who made him what he is today? Or will the Heavy Hitter beat the yellow out of his cowardly, treacherous protégé?" NTD petulantly notes, "Man, there is just no middle ground with you is there? Either a guy is the best thing since the invention of the wheel or he's something you wiped off your shoe. Find your center, man!" Funyon stands in the middle of the ring, looking resplendent as always in his bright purple tux. "Ladies and gentlemen, the following match is scheduled for one fall, and there will be NO interference! Introducing first, from Dayton, Ohio... weighing in at 224 lbs, he is the original Gambling Man, THE SUICIDE KINGGGGG!!!!!!!!!!" The fans instantly burst into sincere, heartfelt hatred. Curry quickly notes, "This is certainly not the response the King is used to!" The arena goes dark... "ALL ABOARD!! AH HAH HAH HAH!!" The stage suddenly explodes as a wall of crimson pyro shoots skyward, deafening and blinding those closest. When the pyro finishes the wailing guitar chords of Ozzy Ozborne's "Crazy Train" pick up in volume and the Suicide King is revealed, posing cockily, his injured, wrapped hand held high as the crowds pours their derision on him (accompanied by the squeals of a few desperate women). Smirking in disdain the Gambling Man makes his way down to the ring, strutting like he is the single greatest thing since sliced bread. Making his way to ringside, he jumps up to stand on the ring apron and moves provocatively between the ropes. Once inside the ring the Suicide King circles the ropes, making sure that everyone in attendance gets a good, long look at the most talented, entertaining, and handsome man in wrestling today. The men swear, the women squeal, and the IGNWF collects another fortune in merchandising... the Suicide King casually brushes the hair out of his eyes with his good hand and waits for his unworthy opponent. NTD remarks approvingly, "He isn't an egomaniac, he just IS as good as he thinks he is!" Funyon continues as the arena goes black, noticeably eager to get out of the ring before the very, very personal conflict begins... **CRACK** And the crowd goes wild!!! "And introducing second... from Lincoln, Nebraska and weighing in at 284 lbs... he is 'GRAND SLAM' MARK STEVENNNNNNNS!!!!!" Funyon dives out of the ring at breakneck speed as "Born Bad" begins to play. The IGNtron begins to flash Mark's video package, but as the lights begins to flash in a strobe-like effect, periodic glimpses of Grand Slam running down the aisleway can be seen! Instead of waiting for his usual entrance routine, the Heavy Hitter instantly slides into the ring, not waiting a second before rocking King back with a VIOLENT series of right hands!!!!! The ref frantically signals for the bells as the fans burst into cheers and the guys backstage shut off the intro... DING DING DING!!! "Looks like Mark came to get him some!" Curry yells approvingly. Grand Slam rains right after right down into the face of the King of Hearts, who is completely overwhelmed by the savagery of his sudden assault! Stevens bears the King down to the mat with his superior mass where he continues the assault, one after the other... this continues for several seconds as the ref frantically tries to pull the Heavy Hitter off of the bludgeoned and bruised Suicide King! "Get in there ref! Those are clenched fists!" NTD demands. The ref finally pulls Stevens off, grabbing him by both shoulders and yelling directly into his face. Stevens, with uncharacteristic anger, shoves the ref aside! The King, knowing only that the barrage has come to a halt, scrambles toward the ring ropes and attempts to get the hell out of Dodge! Stevens shakes his head, teeth gritted, and grabs the King by one wayward ankle before dragging him back into the center of the ring! The King's arms flail as they try to find some purchase on the mat, but to no avail as Grand Slam drags him back into the dragon's lair... one of King's legs flashes out, catching Stevens low on his leg. This gives the Suicide King just enough time to scramble to his feet before lashing out with a sudden clothesline! Grand Slam ducks the arm however, letting the Gambling Man spin in place before catching him in a waistlock and chucking him directly overhead with a bell-to-belly suplex! King lands hard, clutching his back... Mark wastes no time however, immediately going over and pulling the King upright by a handful of hair and then whipping him into the ropes! The Suicide King has obviously had enough however, and drops into a slide that takes him right out of the ring! Shaking his head and throwing his arms down the King... begins walking up the entry ramp? Curry yells out in triumph, "Ha!! Look at your King now, NTD! He's decided he's had enough and he's running out of here, tail between his legs!" "Shut up! I'm sure this is all part of some master plan concocted by the Suicide King and Chris Wilson!" With a look of confusion, Curry stares at his erstwhile partner. "You just don't get it sometimes do you?" Grand Slam stands in the ring for a long second, watching the back of the retreating Gambling Man scoot up the entrance ramp. He shakes his head in disbelief as the ref starts a ten count. Grand Slam gives the ref a quick look, then steps over the top rope and heads after King! The crowd screams their approval, cheering on the Heavy Hitter as he approaches King from behind, grabs two handfuls of blond hair and starts to bodily drag the Suicide King back to the ring!! As the duo pass a camera, the mike picks up Grand Slam cursing at his former student, while King screams like a little girl, using both hands to try and relieve some of the tearing pressure on his follicles!! With a quick snap of his arms, Stevens sends King into the ring under the bottom rope, then follows behind quickly. Laughing hard, Curry manages to squeak out, "Now that is how you keep a match in the ring!!" With true disbelief in his voice, NTD responds, "I have no idea what you think is so funny!! Hair pulling can cause serious neck and head trauma!! Once, when I was still wrest..." Curry (thankfully) cuts him off by saying, "Look at that!!" In the ring, Grand Slam is on his feet and waiting for King to stand, lining him up for more pain! The crowd is loving it, cheering everything Grand Slam does!! King finally makes to his feet looking dazed, then the Heavy Hitter strikes!! He rears back and delivers a vicious-looking knife-edge chop that causes King to stagger back into the ropes! The crowd lets out a huge "Whooo"!! Another chop, another "Whoo!"!! Grand Slam appears happy with the huge red welts blossoming on King's chest! He reaches down and grabs King's right arm and tries to whip him across the ring! But the Heartbreaker is all over that action, planting both feet and reversing the whip, sending the Heavy Hitter into the ropes!! With determination etched in his face, Grand Slam charges out of the ropes, using the momentum to shoulder check the Gambling Man into oblivion!!! With dismay in his voice, NTD says quietly, "Well, whatever King was planning there didn't work." "That is an understatement!! The Gambling Man just cannot catch a break in this match!! Grand Slam has been overpowering him at every turn, never letting King have a chance to catch his breath!!" For a brief second Grand Slam stands over the fallen Suicide King, then throws himself into the ropes, bounce back and drops a huge leg across King's chest!!! King convulses on the mat once, then rolls over, trying to keep his shoulders off the mat! Grand Slam stands up quickly, then pulls King up after him. Irish Whip by Grand Slam, and this time it has the desired effect, sending King into the ropes with a tremendous amount of speed!! Bounce back, and Grand Slam lifts him into the air, parallel to the mat and powers him back down with a massive sidewalk slam!!! The crowd again lets out a huge pop as Grand Slam drops to the mat and hooks the leg... 1... 2... 3NO!!! Kickout by the King but just barely! "That was as close as I have ever seen a count!! King just barely pulled his shoulder off the mat in time!!" Curry yells into his mike. NTD responds with, "He is just playing possum!! Yeah, that's the ticket... playing possum!" Grand Slam looks briefly at the ref, then stands up, pulling the battered King of Hearts up after him with a big handful of hair. Maintaining a grip on King's locks, Grand Slam rears back and drives his forehead into the face of King, delivering a gargantuan head-BUTT!! King tries to fall back, but Grand Slam still has a hold on his hair. With the other arm, the Heavy Hitter reaches down and grabs the King's left arm and without a second thought lets go of King's hair and spins in place, wrenching King's arm nearly out of the socket!! "Hey!! Hey, they had an agreement!! Grand Scam promised not to go after King's injured hand!!" NTD cries into the mike!! At that moment, it appears that Grand Slam also realizes what he is doing, takes a quick look at the heavily bandaged left hand of the Gambling Man and quickly lets go of the hold!! Holding his left hand close to his chest, King reaches up with his good right arm and gouges the eyes of the Heavy Hitter!! Boos cascade down on the ring as Stevens staggers back from his opponent and the ref starts to warn King about shots to the eye!! King looks vaguely interested in what the ref is saying, then turns his back on him and stalks Grand Slam like a tiger!! He catches Grand Slam's arm and whips him across the ring, bounce back and King leaps into the air, nailing Stevens in the center of the chest with a strong dropkick!! King hits the mat as Grand Slam falls backwards into the ropes and staggers forward! Wasting no moment of hard-won advantage, King catches Grand Slam's leg in a drop toehold, sending the big man face first into the mat!! "Superior ring tactics by the Gambling Man! I told you he was just playing possum!" NTD squeals. The big man reaches up to his face with one hand, checking to see if his nose is bleeding. The fates are smiling as the crimson mask has not yet made its appearance... Stevens begins to rise, turning in place to attempt to find the King. As Grand Slam turns his eyes have only mere moments to register the oncoming freight train of the Suicide King as he bounces off of the ropes and sends the Heavy Hitter down with a flying cross body! King maintains the vertical press for the cover... 1... 2... NO! Stevens arches his back powerfully, kicking out and thrusting the King into the air! "Perhaps a tad optimistic there by the King," Curry notes. Stevens again rises to his feet, regarding the also rising King dubiously. The Suicide King steps in forcefully, determined to maintain his advantage... but Grand Slam quickly fires a right into the Gambling Man's gut, staggering the littler man and knocking the breath out of him! Stevens follows with another, and another, the last one actually lifting the King some inches into the air from the impact... Stevens grimaces, grabbing the King by his right arm and again attempting to whip him across the ring, only to have it AGAIN reversed by the smaller, faster King! The Suicide King widens his stance and readies himself as Stevens springs forth... bounce back, and the King absolutely plows into Grand Slam with a devastating shotei strike right into his sternum! "HEARTBREAKER!!! The Suicide King has got Grand Scam on the run now!" NTD exults. Grand Slam stands motionless, his hands clutching his chest as he tries vainly to breathe... the King smirks evilly, measuring Stevens up... one quick hop forward and the King's foot shoots up at blinding speed, catching the Heavy Hitter under the chin with a superkick and knocking him back down to the mat! The King quickly dives down and makes the cover... 1... 2... 3NO!!! Grand Slam barely raises his shoulder in time as the fans explode! The King slaps the mat in frustration, holding up three fingers to the ref who responds with the ref's universal two fingers. Growling out loud the King gets back to his feet, raining stomp after stomp down on the Heavy Hitter's unprotected torso. Stevens writhes in place, clearly in pain... smirking once again, the King sprints across the ring, hopping up to the top turnbuckle in one fluid motion... "The Suicide King is getting ready to show us why he is the best high flyer in the league The best splash since Superfly is about to take control!" NTD squeals like a Catholic schoolgirl. Raising both arms high into the air, the King leaps forth... AND EATS A HASTILY RAISED BOOT FROM THE HEAVY HITTER! King's head snaps back and he crashes to the mat next to Grand Slam!! The crowd explodes; cheering as Stevens pushes his way back to his feet. He looks at King, then at the top rope, then back at King. Making a decision, the Heavy Hitter stands over King and pulls him to his knees with another handful of hair. Grand Slam pulls back his right arm and brings it down again, smashing a forearm across the side of King's face!! Another shot, another!! One more to grow on, and Grand Slam lets the Gambling Man drop back to the mat motionless!! With one stomp for good measure, Grand Slam heads to the corner and climbs quickly to the top turnbuckle!! King, bewildered and befuddled, rolls over onto his back, trying to force air back into his lungs. Flashbulbs pop as Stevens steadies himself on the top rope facing away from the ring. With a fast look behind him and a deep breath, he launches himself backwards in an absolutely beautiful moonsault!! For a moment he seems to hang in the air, then crashes down on the Suicide King!! Grand Slam skids away from King a foot or two, then pulls himself back to his opponent, hooks the leg... 1... 2... King raises one arm in the air, pulling his shoulder just a fraction of an inch off the mat!! The ref signals the count to Grand Slam, who rocks back on his knees and stares at the roof of the arena for a second before getting back to business! "This isn't about winning or losing anymore for the Heavy Hitter, NTD," Curry says, "This is about pride and about revenge!! Grand Slam has something to prove here tonight!" Grand Slam pulls himself to his feet, then waits for King to do the same. Grand Slam is on him instantly, sending several punches into the head and shoulders of the Suicide King, making the younger man stagger back into the ropes! Grand Slam whips him across the ring, bounce back, the Heavy Hitter picks him up, spins him around and PLANTS him with a massive Spinebuster!! Grand Slam is back to his feet, and this time instead of pulling King off the mat, decides he has had enough comebacks for one night and starts to tie the Gambling Man's legs up in the Figure Four!!! The crowd's cheers seem to snap King to full alertness as Grand Slam falls back, locking in the move!!! A scream of agony erupts from the King's throat as his legs are slowly being twisted in directions they were never meant to go!! Immediately, he starts to scramble, waving his arms wildly and trying to reach the nearest rope!! Grand Slam is pulling back on the hold with all of his considerable strength!! King sees the ropes only a little ways away and reaches for them! He is an inch away, not quite able to make it!! King bites his lip and readies himself. As soon as Grand Slam lets the pressure up for a millisecond in an attempt to cinch the hold tighter, King suddenly twists his upper body and flips the hold over!! Grand Slam clenches his jaw and tries to pull himself out of the hold while yelling something over his shoulder at the King! King yells something back, punctuated by an obscene gesture, then pushes himself off the mat and releases the hold!! "What the heck happened there??" a bewildered Curry asks. "King is an honest and good man!! He made an agreement and he is sticking to it Curry!" NTD yells back! Both men lay in the ring, gasping for breath and rubbing sore legs, trying to get feeling back. The ref looks at both men and starts to administer a ten count... 1... 2... 3... 4... 5... 6... 7... Both men push their way to their knees... 8... Grand Slam pushes his way to his feet... 9... King uses the ropes to pull himself off the mat just in time!! Both men are on their feet and staring the other, hate in their eyes!! The crowd starts to buzz, anticipating the clash that is sure to follow! King starts to work his way slowly towards Grand Slam, but the Heavy Hitter throws himself back into the ropes and charges King!! King tries to step to one side, but his legs aren't fast enough this time and Grand Slam flips him head-over-heels with a huge clothesline!! The crowd pops for their hero as he pulls the King of Hearts, his former teammate, to his feet and into a front facelock! He grabs a handful of tights and lifts King up perpendicular to the ring, holding him high in the air!! The crowd is cheering, flashbulbs are popping and Grand Slam still stands there, holding the King high, letting him see the doom that is to come!! "What a display of power NTD!!! He is holding the Gambling Man over his head like he doesn't weigh a thing!!" Curry says. "You don't play with the Suicide King like that Curry!" NTD responds, "he is one of the best in the business at exploiting his opponent's mistakes!!" As if in answer to NTD's statement, King suddenly kicks his feet and floats over, catches Grand Slam's head in an inverted facelock, and NAILS A REVERSE DDT OUT OF NOWHERE!!!! The back of Grand Slam's head plows into the mat and bounces up again as King maintains the inverted facelock... taking a moment to rest, the Suicide King takes several deep breaths as he tightens his grip in. He looks around at the crowd who are responding universally with loud disapproval... "Show some respect, cretins! The man is a master!" NTD says. Having recovered enough juice, the King lifts his former mentor up by the inverted facelock before once again slamming the back of his head into the mat!!! Grand Slam's head has taken a world of hurt and the King shows no sign of letting up on it as he lifts the larger man up by his neck one more time... but this time the back of Grand Slam's head doesn't meet the comforting mat, instead impacting into the Suicide King's knee! Grand Slam sinks weakly to the ground as the King stands upright, gloating loudly... "What chain wrestling from the Gambling Man! I guess THAT would be a 'Triple Play,' wouldn't it Curry?" NTD smugly notes. "You are in grave danger of me killing you. I just thought you should know," Curry slowly, measuredly says. Grand Slam is motionless on the canvas as his protégé stands above him... smirking, the King runs over to the corner, springing up to the top turnbuckle. Wasting absolutely no time the King springs off, sailing forth and slamming into the Heavy Hitter's sternum with a Superfly splash!!! A quick hook of the leg and... 1... 2... 3NO! The capacity crowd explodes once again as the Heavy Hitter somehow, someway holds on to life! The King is cursing a blue streak at the ref who for his part is remaining firm on his two count... glaring death at the ref, the Gambling Man helps Stevens to his feet, doubling him over with a quick toe kick to the abdomen. Stevens gasps and bends, allowing the King to grab his arm and cinch in a tight arm wrench! Stevens slaps at the shoulder in pain, but King doesn't seem to be in the mood to let the Heavy Hitter off of the hook. Quickly jerking the arm up and down, the King drives the larger man to his knees... Stevens grimaces, but can't do much about his bad luck. The King maintains the arm wringer and measures the Heavy Hitter up... before thrusting a straight side kick into Steven's armpit!! Curry yells out, "What is he trying to do? Dislocate the man's arm?" NTD smugly responds, "The agreement covered the knee. No other joints were included." The Suicide King fires another straight side kick into the armpit of the Heavy Hitter, who responds appropriately with a loud cry of pain. The King smirks, gesturing with his free arm to the crowd as if to say "This is your hero?" King steps back, raising his right leg high above his head before bringing it down like an executioner's axe onto the Heavy Hitter's shoulder!!! Stevens hits the mat, his good arm cradling his injured limb protectively as the King celebrates his impending victory above him... "Stick and move King! He's ripe for the plucking!" NTD joyfully exclaims. Lifting the helpless fan favorite up, the King drags him over to the corner turnbuckle. Cinching in a tight side headlock, the King runs at the corner, climbing the turnbuckles and spinning, nailing a beautiful tornado bulldog as the fans respond with a torrent of derision! The former King of Hearts flips the big man over, moving to cover... 1... 2... NO! Grand Slam kicks out with surprising strength as the Gambling Man looks at the ref. Obviously trying to contain his emotions, the Heartbreaker holds up two fingers with a questioning expression, to which the ref nods... "The Heavy Hitter won't go down! Not like this, not to a man like this!" Curry shouts out. The Suicide King clearly takes a moment to weigh the benefits of killing the ref, before lifting Stevens up. Cussing up a storm under his breath, the King whips the big man into the ropes and charges in after him, murder on his mind! The Heavy Hitter bounces back and before the Suicide King can even blink, Stevens raises a boot to face level and drives the King's nose into his brain with a devastating blow!! King drops to the mat like a dead man!! Grand Slam shakes his head once, clearing away the cobwebs before pulling the King back to his feet. He pulls the Gambling Man into a front facelock, drapes the King's arm over his neck, grabs a handful of tights and doesn't make the same mistake twice, throwing King up and over with a powerful snap suplex!! The crowd lets out a cautious cheer, expecting the canny Suicide King to reverse something any minute!! Grand Slam rolls to his feet, pulls King up after him and into another front facelock, then plants his former student with a DDT!! King lies very still as Grand Slam regains his vertical base. "This is it NTD!! It is do or die time for the Heavy Hitter," Curry says to an unimpressed NTD. "This match is a long way from over Curry Man!! Mark my words!!" Grand Slam pulls King off the mat again, spins him around and locks in the Full Nelson!! The crowd pops as Grand Slam lifts King's feet off the mat, then sits out, slamming the Heartbreaker's tailbone into the mat!! "I think we all know what is coming next!! Here we go!!" Curry exclaims! Without missing a beat, the Heavy Hitter starts to stand without releasing the Full Nelson! King's head rolls around on his neck as he is dragged back to his feet! Once more, Grand Slam lifts King's feet off the mat, but this time, throws him face first into the mat!! "And Grand Slam completes the Double Play!!!" Curry screams into the mike!! "No!! No way Grand Scam wins this match on that stupid move!!! This is totally unfair!!" NTD protests. Apparently, Grand Slam has much the same idea. Deliberately, he pulls King off the mat and into a standing head scissors!! The crowd starts to cheer even before Stevens raises his right hand in the air and spins it around, signaling his finisher!! He hooks the right arm, then the left (a little more gingerly than the right, being a man of his word)... the crowd continues to cheer their hearts out, confident that their hero has matters well in hand! "Time for the Walk-Off! The Suicide King is getting ready to go to the big casino in the sky!" Curry says. Stevens stands there for a long moment, tensing his legs to complete the Walk-Off... WHEN SUDDENLY THE KING'S INJURED HAND BREAKS FREE OF ITS PRISON, DIVING DOWNWARD AND SLAMMING INTO THE SIDE OF THE HEAVY HITTER'S KNEE!! STEVENS' LEG COLLAPSES FROM UNDER HIM AS HE CRIES OUT IN PAIN! "WHAT THE -" Curry yells. Stevens rolls around the canvas, clutching his knee brace to his chest as the Suicide King gets back to his feet... circling him like a vulture, the King pounces and slams his injured left fist into the Heavy Hitter's face! Then again, and again! "I thought his hand was injured!" Curry demands to know. Mark Stevens goes totally limp as the King rolls for the cover... the ref just stands there in shock at the reversal of fortune until the Suicide King's yelling finally brings him over. 1... 2... 3!!!!!!!!!!! DING DING DING!!! The ref raises the Suicide King's injured hand high into the air as Funyon announces the results... "Ladies and gentlemen, the winner of this match via pinfall... THE SUICIDE KING!!!!!!!!!!" The crowd is in utter disbelief as the King stands upright, arms raised in victory... AND THEN IMMEDIATELY RETURNS TO THE TASK AT HAND, SLAMMING HIS INJURED FIST INTO THE SIDE OF THE HEAVY HITTER'S KNEE OVER AND OVER AGAIN!!! The crowd screams in protest and the ref attempts to drag the King off of his one-time mentor, only to receive a backhand from the injured fist that knocks him clean out of the ring! "Wow! If that's what the King can do with a hurt hand, imagine what he can do with the other one!" NTD marks out. "You flaming idiot," Curry responds simply, partially in shock at the display of barbarism before him. After several parting shots to the knee of the unconscious Mark Stevens, the King stands up, triumphant and alone in the center of the ring. Carefully and pointedly lifting his injured hand into the air, the King dramatically begins to unwrap the tape from around his injured fist... Revealing a pair of brass knuckles!!! The crowd blows a gasket at this ultimate betrayal of a mentor as the Suicide King takes the now revealed weapon and begins to wreak bloody vengeance on the side of his one-time trainer's knee!!! "It was a set-up!! The King's hand was never injured! This was all some horrible trick to take out the Heavy Hitter!" Curry disgustedly says. "And it worked beautifully!" NTD says. "Suicide King, you're my newest hero!" The crowd's derision begins to die slightly as the King apparently has had enough... sliding out of the ring, he makes his way over to the timekeeper. Smiling sweetly and raising the exposed brass knuckles, the Gambling Man manages to persuade the man to give up his chair. Taking the chair the Heartbreaker goes to the ring apron, rummaging around under it for something... "Oh, what now?" Curry asks. And pulls out the Ace of Clubs!!! The crowd redoubles its booing as if that will somehow change what will happen... sliding into the ring, the King takes a long moment to stand over his fallen mentor. Words that will only remain between the two are yelled downward as an expression of unimaginable anger clouds the King's face... opening the chair slightly, the King threads the Heavy Hitter's leg through. Curry softly says, "Oh dear Lord." Raising the Ace of Clubs high above his head, KING BRINGS IT SMASHING DOWN AGAINST THE CHAIR, SHATTERING THE HEAVY HITTER'S KNEE BRACE!! KING BRINGS THE BAT CRASHING DOWN AGAIN, AND AGAIN, AND AGAIN, EACH TIME INCREASING IN INTENSITY!!! "GET SOMEBODY OUT HERE NOW. HE'S TRYING TO CRIPPLE HIM!!!" Curry yells. Again and again the Suicide King destroys his teacher's knee, apparently trying to become the Homicide King! Suddenly the crowd's vocalizations change from utter horror to relief as the King looks up, shocked at the sudden change of atmosphere... "It's Edwin MacPhisto! He's here to save the day!" Curry says. "With a broken leg?" NTD asks doubtfully. Indeed Edwin is hobbling down the ramp as the crowd explodes... the King looks up, a grin lighting his face as he gestures toward the gimp with his baseball bat before laughing out loud! Edwin stops about halfway down the ramp, his features clouded with uncharacteristic rage... "Do something Edwin!" Curry exclaims. In the ring, the Gambling Man playfully swings the Ace of Clubs back and forth as if he were at batting practice, just waiting for the Crown Prince of Flash and Panache to come get him some... Edwin dramatically gestures to his leg, both hands reaching down to cradle it gingerly... AND IN A FLASH OF MOTION EDWIN REACHES DOWN AND RIPS OFF THE CAST!!! "Yes! Get in there Mac Daddy!" Curry screams. "No fair! This match was supposed to be no interference!" "The match is over NTD! And if Edwin doesn't hurry so might be Grand Slam's career!" Edwin runs toward the ring at a full sprint, sliding under the ropes! Uncertainty on his face, the King chooses the better part of valor, sliding under the ropes on the opposite side of the ring and trucking off through the crowd... Edwin stands alone in the ring for a moment as the fans cheer, before instantly dropping to one knee and checking on his fallen stablemate... "Thank God Edwin is back! The Carnival might not be dead, but it is certainly hurting!" Curry says. "Damn Edwin for ruining the Suicide King's fun!" NTD yells. "In any event we have to go!! We'll have an update on the Heavy Hitter's condition come IGNite!! Thanks for watching IGNWF Storm!" As the picture fades out the Mac Daddy can be seen gesturing furiously to the incoming paramedics...

“The forecast called for a Storm tonight folks, and by God we’re bringing it to you right now!” “Comet, you’re so cliché.” “Am I? I’d like to think we’ve got some bad weather ahead, at least for certain superstars, here tonight.” “You may be right about that, but something tells me we’re not on the same wavelength when it comes to predicting who’ll be hit hardest by the Storm.” “Well…there’s, uh…OK, I’m out of meteorology puns.” “Me too. Ready for our first match?” “No doubt about it. Let’s take it down to Funyon for the introductions, so that we can see if lightning will strike for anyone during this Storm!” “That was a good one. Props!” Fans move about in there seats, conversing over internet rumors, television results, and any other bits of information, no matter how miniscule, about the SWF. Famed ring announcer Funyon heads into the ring wielding his trusty microphone, and prepares for the introductions for our first match. “Comet, does this guy get paid by the hour, or per word?” “I…I don’t know. I would assume straight salary, just like the rest of us. Why?” “I just figured if it was per word, we do a lot more talking then him. Could’ve helped us at the bargaining table.” “Riley, nothing out of your mouth surprises me anymore.” “Bah. Just looking out for you, pal. You’re ungrateful.” “DING*DING*DING” The timekeeper rings the bell, and the Floridian fans bellow out a loud pop, showing Funyon that they’re eager for action. FUNYON Ladies and gentlemen, the following contest is your opening bout here on STORM…and it is for the SWF CANADIAN CHAMPIONSHIP!” The opening beat of Fabolous’ “Breathe” starts up, as the lights drop. The only light in the arena is that of the Smarktron, or one of the green strobe lights that pulsate around the entrance stage. “Yo, these n*ggaz can’t BREATHE when I come through, hum too…” Once the first verse hits, Todd Cortez races out of the back and through a golden shower (of pyro, sickos!), jogging from side to side on the stage and working his magic on the crowd! The crowd in the Times Arena is hot for the Urban Legend, as the popular superstar is welcomed to the Sunshine State with an off the charts response! FUNYON Now approaching the ring, the challenger! Hailing from Hollywood Boulevard, and weighing in at two hundred, twenty six pounds…this is the Urban Legend, TODD CORRRRTEZZZZZZZZZZZZZ! “Todd Cortez survived a partnership with Spike Jenkins to get this matchup, and…” “Whoa, back up. SURVIVED? Cortez wouldn’t BE here if it weren’t for Citizen Spike!” “Something tells me that Cortez was doing just fine for his team before Jenkins got greedy and stole the pin, Robert.” “Oh yeah? And what something would tell you that?” “A replay, maybe?” “Oh. Then uh…maybe you got a doctored copy, hmm? Cortez is pretty sly, I mean he is from the streets.” “Yes, because so many street thugs are into planting bogus footage on video tapes these days.” Cortez plants a kiss on his cross, then hops up on the apron, looking to each side of the arena. He then climbs up onto the corner post, waving his arms up and drawing more screams out of the crowd. Todd hops down into the ring and warms up, doing some last minute prep as Funyon prepares to introduce his opponent, the SWF Canadian Champion. Cortez stretches as the crowd noise dies down, only to have the fans by the emergence of a loud “BAM! BAM! BAM! BAM! BAM! BAM! BAM!” “Hyper Music” has been cued, and stepping out onto the entrance ramp is the one, the only Ace Lezaire! The overconfident Canadian Champion throws his arms up, standing at center stage as pyro bursts around him. With the crowd hurling insults and catcalls at him, Lezaire makes his way to the ring, acting oblivious to the hatred with a swagger in his step and a smirk on his face. FUNYON Introducing his opponent…hailing from Vancouver, British Columbia, Canada, he weighs in at two hundred, thirty four pounds. The reigning and defending SWF Canadian Champion…he is ACE LEZZZZZZZZZZZAAAAAIRRRRRE! More boos follow the intro, as Lezaire slides under the bottom rope and pops up on one knee, his arms open as if to welcome adulation. Instead, he continues getting the hell booed out of him, but pays it no mind. Lezaire gets up to his feet and hands his belt over to Funyon, then steps back, measuring up his opponent. With the ring cleared of our announcer, referee Jefferson Harding calls for the bell to get things underway! “What a way to kick things off tonight. Two of the SWF’s young lions going tooth and nail, with a title at stake. Cassidy was right…it don’t get no better!” Cortez puts his arm up, motioning for Lezaire to lock up with him. Ace reaches out locks his fingers around Todd’s…but then brings his left hand around and slaps the Urban Legend across the face! “Ha! Ace Lezaire did not waste any time as far as getting into my good graces tonight!” Cortez flinches, then looks at Lezaire, who is trash talking him and poking his finger in his chest. The whole conversation cannot be heard, but with words like “worthless” and “nobody” audile, it’s quite obvious Lezaire doesn’t feel Cortez is in his league. As Ace inches closer during his taunts, Cortez pushes him back, feeling the Canadian Champion was taking up too much of his personal space. Lezaire shrugs it off, and pushes back, then waves a finger up in Todd’s face…only to be taken over with a judo throw! The crowd pops as a stunned Lezaire gets back to his feet and takes a swing at Cortez, only to have it blocked! Cortez connects with some right hands, sending the defending champion backwards before taking his arm and attempting an Irish Whip. Lezaire counters by doing a full rotation and sending Cortez to the ropes, but Todd hangs on, seeing Lezaire attempt a dropkick. With Cortez stopping short, Ace crash lands, and comes up quickly, only to be sent back down with a dropsault from Todd! Before a recovery can be made Cortez picks Ace up and backs him into the corner, dazing him with a pair of European uppercuts and sending him across the ring, crashing into the far corner! Cortez gets a full head of steam and charges in, but Ace ducks his head and elevates the Urban Legend up into the air, and landing with both feet on the apron! Todd goes low and fires off a shoulderblock, then slingshots over Ace’s back and into the ring. Cortez turns to retrieve Ace from by the ropes, but the quick thinking Canadian jumps up, springing off the second rope and kicking his legs out as he clutches the top rope, scissoring his legs around Cortez’s neck before snapping him to the canvas! “Trademark ankle scissors by Ace Lezaire sends Cortez for a spill!” Ace rushes towards his rival, but Cortez uses a scissors variant, namely a drop toehold, to take him down! Todd hops to his feet and stands over Ace, pulling him up by the waist and trying to carry him over for a German Suplex, but is driven away by the elbow of Ace Lezaire smashing against his cheekbone! As Cortez turns away in pain, Lezaire turns around and lifts him up for a back suplex…only to have Cortez float over and land on his feet behind him! Cortez quickly snatches Lezaire and tries his own back suplex, but the champion showcases HIS agility, stopping the move by flipping over the Urban Legend’s back and landing on his feet…only to be blasted with a discus clothesline that takes him by surprise! The crowd pops at the impact of the move, as Cortez spun around with such momentum that both of Ace’s feet were sent up into the air! Cortez quickly covers, making the first pin attempt of the match (and of this broadcast!). ONE! TW-KICKOUT! “Lezaire easily kicking out of the first pin attempt.” “Of course he easily kicked out, Comet. A man like that doesn’t just go down because you want him to. Trust me, I’d know.” Action continues as Riley spouts his double-entendre, and Cortez reaches for the champion, but finds himself taken down with a fireman’s carry! Todd gets up, but Ace is right with him, and the Urban Legend is soon struck by a blistering knife edge across the chest! “WHOO!” Followed by another! “WHOO!” And a third! “WHOO!” Lezaire then simply shoves Cortez into the corner, wrapping his hands around his throat and choking him out! Referee Harding is quick to call for a break, but Ace eats up every last millisecond of the five count before letting go! Cortez gasps for air, but Lezaire charges in and brings his knee up into Todd’s bread basket, driving even more air out of the Urban Legend! Cortez falls forward, but is caught by Ace and dragged out of the corner. Ace puts an arm across Todd’s chest and plants his right foot behind Todd’s leg, trying for an STO, but Cortez elbows him in the side of the head for a break! Cortez winds up and tries another discus clothesline, but Ace ducks under it and hits the ropes, coming off with a Cyclone Elbow that sends Cortez falling back into the ropes! The momentum of the falls sends Cortez springing back to his feet, just in time to have a foot planted in his ribs and then be taken up and over with a butterfly suplex, courtesy of the SWF Canadian Champion! Lezaire sits up and does a hand wiping motion, proving to the Times Arena crowd that he finds Cortez to be a piece of cake. Lezaire then stands by the head of Cortez and nonchalantly drags the laces of his boot across Todd’s eyes, drawing the ire of the fans that witness the dirty deed! Lezaire looks out to the fans, asking what it is that they’re booing at, and playing stupid to his own actions. “Look at the confidence in Ace Lezaire. What a competitor!” “The Yankees were confident too, and look where they are.” “Don’t go there.” Lezaire pulls Cortez up, but the Urban Legend doesn’t stay on his feet for long, as he’s snapmared back to the canvas, then struck in the back of the neck with a dropkick from Lezaire! Ace yanks Cortez up from the seated position, standing behind him and holding him by the head as he drives hard elbow shots into the back of Todd’s neck! Lezaire snapmares Cortez back to the canvas, and then locks his hands under Todd’s chin, pulling back on the neck with a chinlock. “Lezaire looking to wear Cortez out here.” “Don’t forget about the focus on the neck. Enough wear and tear on it and Cortez will crumble once he’s hit with the Ace Crusher.” Lezaire yanks back on Todd’s head, his right knee driving into Cortez’s neck as he stays kneeling behind the Urban Legend. Harding asks if Cortez is going to submit, but Todd has no plans on making this an easy night for the Canadian Champion. Todd grabs each of Ace’s wrists, trying to pry his hands away. Lezaire struggles to keep the hold applied, but Cortez keeps pulling the arms apart, getting to his feet at the same time. With Ace’s wrists still his grip, Cortez spins out and sends Ace to the ropes, sending him up and ove with a back bodydrop! Lezaire bounces off the canvas, but recovers quickly, charging Cortez and then finding himself carried over with a hip toss! Lezaire immediately backs up into the corner, holding his hands out and asking that Cortez give him a moment’s rest, but Cortez charges in and hops up onto the second rope, and raises his fist in the air before bringing it down onto Ace Lezaire’s forehead! ONE! TWO! THREE! FOUR! FIVE! SIX! SEVEN! EIGHT! NINE! TEN! Cortez connects with all ten punches, much to the delight of the crowd! He hops down and backs up, watching as Ace staggers forward, then pulls him mouthfirst down onto his shoulder, jarring him with a shoulder jawbreaker! Lezaire goes stumbling backwards back into the corner, setting himself up for a monkey flip from Cortez…which he avoids by shoving Todd down to the canvas! Cortez rolls onto his stomach in order to push himself up, while Lezaire shakes the cobwebs loose in the corner. Cortez turns, and Ace comes barging out of the corner with arm extended, looking for a lariat…so the Urban Legend drops low and swings his right leg around, sweeping Lezaire off his feet! Cortez quickly follows up with a standing moonsault onto the champion, drawing a huge pop as he hooks the leg! ONE! TWO! TH-NO! “Cortez was quick with the cover, but Ace Lezaire isn’t about to be shown up in the opening match!” Cortez gets up and brings Lezaire up with him, but Ace drives his thumb into Todd’s eye, temporarily blinding the Urban Legend! Lezaire comes up and starts peppering Cortez with right hand jabs, connecting with each shot since Cortez hasn’t recovered from his blurred vision. Lezaire then hooks Cortez in a waistlock, and brings him up and over with a German Suplex, slamming him on the back of his neck! Lezaire keeps his hands locked, rolling through with the move until both are back on their feet, then hammers the neck of Cortez with forearm shots before bringing him over with a second German, this time bridging out to hold Cortez down for a pin! ONE! TWO! KICKOUT! An ecstatic crowd exerts their jubilance as Todd Cortez throws a shoulder up, avoiding defeat at the hands of The Prodigy. Lezaire gets up to his feet, and stands over Cortez, looming over him and voicing his disgust with Cortez’s persistence, then paintbrushing his face with slaps! “Look at Lezaire, so full of himself. If he thinks he’s that much better than Cortez, why hasn’t he been able to put him down yet?” “Patience, Comet. When you’re a prodigy…nay, THE Prodigy, you can get a three count like *that*.” Lezaire walks away from Cortez, allowing him to lick his wounds while Ace takes issue with the fans that direct their catcalls at him. Ace shouts down at the front row, singling out a few fans by pointing at them during his short tirade, then turns and delivers a big kick to Todd’s ribs as he’s pushing himself off the canvas! Todd rolls onto his back, and now Lezaire stomps away on his foe, then pulls him up only to drop him once again, this time across his knee with a pendulum backbreaker! The champion shoves his challenger off his leg, then stands over him and brushes his hair back before dropping a leg across his throat! “Standing legdrop finds its mark…” “Well DUH, Comet. It’s pretty easy to hit a target that can’t move.” Lezaire stays seated, reaching over to pull Cortez’s head up and then lock his legs around his neck, using the leg scissors to cut off the air that Cortez is trying to intake! Harding checks to see if Todd’s shoulders are down, and while the Urban Legend is safe in that sense, he’s certainly not safe from passing out due to lack of oxygen! Cortez rolls so that he’s on his side, but Ace keeps his legs wrapped tightly around his throat, and even reaches over to slap the Urban Legend a few times, which only serves to make the man from the streets even more po’d! Cortez rolls through to his feet, and with Lezaire keeping the leg scissors applied, he puts himself in a precarious position, as Cortez puts his weight down so that he’s cradling him for a pin! ONE! TW-NO! Lezaire reacts quickly, undoing the leg scissors and kicking Cortez away from him. Todd falls to one knee, but his recovery is again cut short by Lezaire, who has luckily for himself been able to beat the Urban Legend to the punch more than a few times this contest. This time, it was a knee to the gut that did Cortez in, and he then finds himself dragged to the corner, about to have his face rammed into the top turnbuckle…but he puts a foot up to block! Lezaire tries again, but Cortez won’t budge, and moments later it’s Ace who finds his face crashing into the turnbuckle! The Prodigy staggers away, leaning against the ropes, and is then sent across the ring, rebounding only to land facefirst on the canvas after a drop toehold! Immediately after Ace drops, Cortez pops up and grabs the left leg of Ace Lezaire, planting his foot behind his knee and pulling up on the leg before letting it go and watching it drop hard to the mat! Lezaire winces, but Cortez grabs the left ankle and jerks the leg back up in the air, sending the knee smashing into the canvas for a second time! “Great planning by Cortez. If Ace can’t walk, Ace can’t win!” Lezaire crawls hurriedly to the ropes, looking to escape the tide shift in this contest. He pulls himself up with the aid of the ropes, but Cortez tugs at his ponytail, dragging him back to center ring! The sight of the Canadian Champion waving his arms like an air traffic controller as he’s led by the tail draws a chorus of laughter from the fans! “C’mon Harding, disqualify him!” “For a hairpull?” “Why not? Rules are rules, Comet.” “Gee, and here I thought you believed in winning by any means necessary.” “Well, I do. That only counts for certain people though.” Harding scolds the Urban Legend, but Cortez doesn’t allow it to distract him from his offensive tactics, namely pulling Ace up into the air and dropping him down with a shinbreaker on the wounded left leg. Lezaire rolls around and clutches his leg, but like a shark that smells blood Cortez stays on him. He drags Ace by the leg back toward center ring, curbing any chances of the ropes becoming Lezaire’s saving grace. He takes the left leg and tucks it under his left arm, rolling Lezaire onto his stomach and holding the left leg in a single leg crab! “TAP!” “TAP!” “TAP!” Lezaire isn’t locked in for more than a few seconds than the chant is started up by his detractors. Cortez keeps a good grip on the leg and leans back, causing more pressure on the knee and the possible tearing of ligaments. Lezaire winces, and Harding crouches down to look him in the eye and ask him if he can continue. Lezaire doesn’t respond verbally, simply shoving Harding away as best he can. Lezaire stretches out his arms, but Cortez has him out far enough that unless he’s really Mr. Fantastic, he’s not going to reach those ropes! “TAP!” “TAP!” “TAP!” “Listen to these bloodthirsty bastards! All they want to do is see a man crippled!” “No, all they want to do is see Ace Lezaire lose. There’s nothing wrong with that.” “EVERYTHING is wrong with that! What kind of idiot would want someone the stature of Ace Lezaire to drop a title to a known felon?” “Cortez isn’t a felon.” “Comet, just because he says he isn’t doesn’t mean he really isn’t.” The chanting continues, and as Lezaire struggles he pushes himself up so that he can see the crowd and yells “shut up” through his agonizing groans. This only serves to encourage the crowd to do it more and at a louder decibel, but it doesn’t deter Lezaire from using his upper body strength to try and drag his body towards the ropes. Sensing that Lezaire could catch a break (literally), Cortez releases the leg, turning so that he’s hovering over Lezaire and brings him up by the waist, then rocks him with a quick back suplex! With Lezaire stunned, Cortez nods to the crowd, and rolls Ace onto his stomach, dropping to his knees and looking for The Hook Up…but Ace quickly crawls away and rolls under the bottom rope to the floor, buying himself some time! “What a strategist! That was a brilliant move!” “That was cowardice!” “No, it’s called saving your ass, and your title. Although you wouldn’t know anything about ass or titles, now would you?” Lezaire is showered with boos and he pushes himself onto all fours, then tries to stand on the floor. As he gets up he staggers off balance, showing that his leg definitely isn’t in pristine condition. Lezaire hobbles around ringside, as Harding does his best to keep Cortez at bay, not wanting the action to spill to the outside. Lezaire walks over to Funyon, and demands that his belt be handed to him, a request that Funyon begrudgingly agrees to. Lezaire swipes the belt away from the beloved announcer, then turns around and delivers the old chin flip-off to Cortez, and begins to walk around towards the aisleway. More booing ensues, but Lezaire doesn’t even bother to interact with the crowd, instead heading up the aisleway towards the locker room area! “Ace Lezaire is running scared!” “What do you mean running scared? He’s obviously too hurt to continue, and is sparing himself permanent injury at the hands of that madman!” “Madman? Because he’s determined to carve his own niche now that Hollywood Boulevard is no more?” “Exactly! He’s desperate to make a name for himself, and…” Riley’s comments are cut off by the roar of the crowd, who react that way due to Cortez bailing out of the ring and giving chase to Lezaire! The Canadian Champion is grabbed once again by his ponytail and led back to ringside by Cortez, who then rams his face into the ring apron and rolls him into the ring! Todd scoops up the Canadian Title from ringside and holds it up in the air, drawing a pop from the fans who would like to see it around his waist after tonight. Todd slides into the ring and drops the belt, drawing ref Harding over to recover it and get it out of the way before it comes into play. This tactic buys Ace Lezaire some time though, as he notices Harding turning away, so when Cortez leans over to grab him, he catches the Urban Legend with a low blow that brings him down! “OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH!” “Now Robert, you tell me how that move didn’t reek of desperation!” “Desperation? He saw an opening, and he took it. That’s the mark of a true competitor!” Lezaire stands up and leads Cortez up too, then pounds on his back with forearms to wear him down. Ace backs Cortez into the ropes and then fires him across the ring with an Irish whip, catching him on the rebound and spinning over, planting Cortez with a powerslam! Lezaire keeps his body across Todd’s chest, and hooks the leg, shouting for Harding to quickly make the count! ONE! TWO! THR-NO! “YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAH!” Lezaire pounds the mat and forces Cortez to his feet, staggering him with some stiff right hand jabs that send him reeling back. Cortez stumbles, but fires back with right hands of his own, and a brawl breaks down between the two workers! Looking to regain the advantage, Ace Lezaire sidesteps a punch and brings his knee up into Todd’s ribs, but then he himself staggers, as he used the very knee that Cortez had been targeting! Winded, Cortez recaptures his breath and then shoots for the legs, pulling Lezaire to the mat and trying to roll him over! Lezaire won’t go without a fight, and starts swinging at Cortez, eventually driving him away with his wild shots! Cortez moves in again, and Lezaire gets up and charges him, swinging behind him and using a schoolboy rollup, taking a chunk of Todd’s tights in his hands for added incentive! ONE! TWO! THRE-KICKOUT! “What!? That was three!” “No, it was two, and Lezaire is lucky he got that, since he’s Mr. Grabby Tights tonight!” Lezaire is astounded that he didn’t get the win with that, so he violently yanks Cortez up and plants a boot in his gut, then wraps his arm up around his head, looking for the ACE CRUSHER~!…only to be shoved into the ropes…SUPERKICK BY TODD CORTEZ LEVELS ACE LEZAIRE! COVER!!! ONE! TWO! THRE-NO! KICKOUT BY THE CHAMPION! A collective “Awwww” echoes throughout the Times Arena, as the fans bought that as the sure match ender. Cortez leaves the dazed Lezaire on the mat, and steps out to the apron, heading for the cornerpost. A sense of excitement comes over the already rabid crowd as they see Cortez ascending to the top rope slowly…ONLY TO BE CROTCHED BY ACE LEZAIRE’S SHAKING OF THE ROPES! “OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH!” Cortez falls hard, pain surging through parts of the body that are sensitive enough as it is. A woozy Lezaire, perhaps not even realizing what just happened, steps back and walks in circles for a moment, unsure of what to do next. He finally sees Cortez agonizing on the top turnbuckle and slowly climbs after him, setting Cortez up for God knows what. Cortez, still hurting, still has enough presence of mind to fight off the attack, hammering at Lezaire’s ribs in hopes of knocking him off balance. Ace struggles with the Urban Legend, but finally Cortez gets both hands up and shoves Lezaire off the ropes. Lezaire attempts to land on his feet, and he successfully does, only to blow out his knee due to the impact of the landing! Ace limps towards the corner, but Cortez is able to stand himself up on the top rope, and leaps off, jumping over Lezaire and landing on his feet behind him! Cortez runs at him, but Ace fires off a back elbow that rocks Cortez, then reaches back and hooks Cortez’s head for the Ace Crusher…NO! Cortez pushes him into the corner, causing Ace to crash sternum first! He stumbles backwards into the arms of a waiting Cortez, who takes him over with a rear waistlock takedown…AND THE HOOKS UP THE HOOK UP! “He’s got him down! Can he do it?” “No…NO!” Lezaire squirms, but Cortez presses his knees into the Canadian’s shoulder blades, pinning him down. Lezaire kicks his legs like a pouting child, but Cortez gets ahold of the left leg, bringing it up and bending it over his shoulder with enough force to snap the leg in two! “Cortez has hooked up Ace Lezaire!” “Stop it with the puns, Comet! Ace Lezaire will not tap!” Cortez tugs on the leg, putting as much pressure as possible on it, as Lezaire screams and gasps in pain. Harding crouches down in front of Lezaire, looking into his eyes as the fans once again break out in a chant. “TAP!” “TAP!” “TAP!” Lezaire shakes his head, but Cortez pulls down on the leg harder, drawing an exhausting cry from the Canadian Champion. Harding questions him once again, and Lezaire hesitates in answering him, trying not to succumb to the pain… …BUT BEING FORCED TO SAY HE GIVES! “YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!” The bell rings, and the Times Arena explodes in a frenzy, as Todd Cortez falls to the mat, exhausted. Harding rushes over to the ropes and converses with Funyon, who gladly takes the mic and makes things official. “Ladies and gentlemen, your winner…and the NEEEEEW SWF CANA…” Cortez makes the “cut” motion, telling Funyon to stop the announcement, then walks over to the ropes and whispers something to him. Funyon nods, and then begins another announcement. ”Ladies and gentlemen, I stand corrected. Your winner…And NEEEEEEW SWF USJL CHAMPION…THE URBAN LEGEND, TODDDD CORRRRTEZZZZZZ!” The crowd pops as “Breathe” is cued up, and Cortez stands tall with the belt! Todd takes the gold chain from around his neck and kisses the cross that hangs from it, then looks up at the sky and holds the belt up higher, basking in this moment for all it’s worth. “What a way to kick off storm, and there’s no one else who deserves this as much as Todd Cortez!” “Oh please, Comet, spare me your bandwagon jumping commentary.” Cortez props himself up on the middle rope, holding the belt out for all to see, as the fans compliment the new champion with a great reaction. Lezaire has rolled out of the ring, and is being aided up the aisle by trainers, a hurting and defeated man. “There’s someone who isn’t going to be in a mood to hit an after party.” “What do you know about them?” “I’m not concerned with the after parties, Bobbo, because I’m too busy with the one going on in the ring. Todd Cortez has just captured the USJL Championship, and we still have a long way to go here on Storm!” Cortez hops off the ropes and ducks out of the ring, hopping to the floor and slapping hands on his way up the ramp, the USJL Title glistening as it hangs off his shoulder. “Oy vey. Tonight is not going to be a good night, I can feel it.” “Coming from you, that means I’m going to be enjoying myself. Folks, we’ll be back with more Storm after these words from our sponsors!”

I don't believe it. The streak is over.

Ask him if he was GEARED UP to play King of Fighters Maximum Impact. Because of that contest... you know.

The Smartmarks wrestling Federation presents... SWF LOCKDOWN, WEDNESDAY, OCTOBER 13TH, LIVE FROM THE KEYARENA IN SEATTLE, WASHINGTON! (5:00pm PDT, 8:00pm EDT; check local listings) Send marked matches, promos, etc. to 5_moves_of_doom Opening Promo: Up for grabs MAIN EVENT#1 SWF CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH Toxxic© vs Andrea Montgomery This time, it’s for real. The conflict has been growing, and now, Toxxic defends his title. Could we have the first female world champion? Rules: DQ and countout apply. Word Limit: 6000 Send To: realitycheck SINGLES MATCH Landon “La Cucaracha Maddix” vs Jamie Drazon 3 times? 3 times? 3 times? I guess he tied even me, but Maddix is now a 3 time ICTV champ. To celebrate, Maddix will face off against one of the oldest of the old guard, Mister JD. Rules: DQ and countout apply. Word Limit: 5500 Send To: chirs3 QUESTION MARK MATCH ??? vs Manson We haven’t seen Question Mark man grace our doorstep for some time, but it looks like he’s back! Manson, your opponent will be revealed to you, and only you. Rules: DQ and countout apply. Word Limit: 5000 Send To: Thoth USJL CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH David Cross© vs Ace Lezaire The rematch is granted, and so this match takes place. Rules: DQ and countout apply. Word Limit: 5000 Send To: Suicide King ICTV/US TITLE CONTENDERSHIP TAG TEAM MATCH Todd Cortez & Spike Jenkins vs Austin Sly & Ryan Dustin Tag match like whoa. The winning team decides who gets ICTV shot, and who gets US shot. Rules: DQ and countout apply. Word Limit: 5500 Send To: 5_moves_of_doom HARDCORE TITLE CONTENDERSHIP MELEE Uncle Filthy vs Evan Wolfe vs Danny Dagda vs Carnage To earn the harcore title, one must be ruthless. In this match, you must be ruthless and destroy your opponents. This is a hardcore rules match if there ever was one! Rules: DQ and countout do not apply whatsoever. First pin wins. Word Limit: 5000 Send To: Chuck Woolery SINGLES MATCH rKade vs Kaine An arcade is a place where people go to have fun. rKade is a person whom people go to to get smacked around. The question is, can Kaine spell, or not? Rules: DQ and countout apply. Word Limit: 4000 Send To: Grand Slam

OOPS. I forgot to replace the versus's with ampersands. Two people on the left fight two people on the right.

The crowd is buzzing, getting themselves ready for the next match. The Rose Garden is quiet, true, but as the lights all around the arena go down, leaving a single God's eye spotlight on Funyon in the middle of the ring, one might get the feeling that something truly special is about to go down. "Ladies and gentlemen! The following contest is scheduled for ONE fall! If Mike Van Siclen wins, he becomes the NEW S - W - F WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION!" "RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!" These words set the crowd off, but their cheers die down quickly as Funyon ignores them, continuing on. "However, if Toxxic wins, then he RETAINS the World Heavyweight Championship, and Mike Van Siclen is forced to retire!" "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Funyon looks down at his note cards briefly, and then looks up, speaking once more. "And now, ladies and gentlemen... the CHALLENGER..." The spotlight on Funyon goes off, and a low cheer begins in the crowd as they wait for it... "I'm head of the class!" The 20,000-strong crowd absolutely EXPLODES, drowning out the next lines of "Popular" by Nada Surf as they rise in unison! Four explosions of gold pyro go off atop the ramp, and Mike Van Siclen steps through the curtain, his blonde hair tied back and tonight wearing black tights with the white initials "MVS" stenciled on the sides. The crowd roars for the Spectacle as he makes his way down the ramp, uncharacteristically ignoring the fans, focused on nothing but the ring, and as he rolls into it Funyon makes his announcement. "Weighing in at two-HUNDRED and forty-one pounds, he hails from Harrison, Illinois! Give it up for the Spectacle... MIIIIIIIIIKE VA - AN SIIIIIIIC - LEN!" "M! V! S!" "M! V! S!" "This crowd is alive for Mike Van Siclen!" Cyclone Comet cries, the first time we've heard from him all match. "Well, it's going to suck when he loses," Bobby Riley says matter-of-factly. The lights go down once more, and Funyon clears his throat as Van Siclen begins warming up in his corner. "And now... the CHAMPION..." A low boo begins reverberating throughout the arena, and the Smarktron screen goes white as the opening chord of "Rookie" by Boy Sets Fire crashes out over the arena. The screen darkens, and as it hits black the familiar slogan flashes up, one word at a time in jagged white letters... "PREPARE TO BE PROVED WRONG..." The guitar riff starts, and the black screen shifts, becoming the top of a spiky-haired head that raises and stares out with piercing grey eyes before a lopsided grin creases the right-hand side of Toxxic's face. The bass drum starts and clips of his matches flash up - the All-Show Brawl with the Insane Luchador, the infamous Glass Jawbreaker on Aecas, dropping Nathaniel Kibagami on his head with the Caffeine Bomb and the Super Intoxxication that won him the World Title.. ...before moving onto footage of Toxxic taking Mike Van Siclen off a balcony and through a table, the devastating landing timed to coincide with the four blast of red pyro that climb the entrance ramp before the final, stagewide eruption as the main riff starts... *BAM-BAM-BAM-BAM-BOOM!* ...that signifies the arrival of the SWF's premier straight-edger! Toxxic strides through the smoke with the SWF World Heavyweight Championship on his shoulder as he makes his way down to the ring, the fans unmercifully booing the hell out of him as he walks! "Weighing in at two-hundred and EIGHTEEN pounds, he hails from Nottingham in the United Kingdom, he is the Straight-Edge Sensation AND the S - W - F WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION... TOXXXXXXXXXXXXX - IC!" Toxxic rolls into the ring and stands in the center for a moment or two, Van Siclen allowing him to stand there as he throws his arms wide, and causes each turnbuckle to explode with more red pyro! *BAP-BAP* *BOOM!* Toxxic hands the SWF Championship to referee Nicolai Soapdish, and he turns his back on Van Siclen, taking his shirt off and throwing it to Jet on the outside, turning around to face Mike Van Siclen... ... and Van Siclen is already right there, and he nails Toxxic across the face with a SICK bitchslap! *SMACK!* "OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH!" Toxxic's head snaps over to the side, but his pride is wounded more than his face, and as he turns back to Van Siclen he pounces, leaping at Van Siclen as Soapdish rings the bell... *DING DING DING!* Van Siclen backs up, throwing his arms out and stopping Toxxic by tying him up collar-and-elbow style. The lockup is effective in halting Toxxic's momentum, and Van Siclen makes good use of his strength advantage by pushing Toxxic back and into the turnbuckle! The wily vet breaks the lock-up, backing up a couple of steps, sizing Toxxic up before charging back at the turnbuckle, looking to crush his face in with a forearm -- but Toxxic ducks, stepping out of the turnbuckle and wrapping his arms around Van Siclen's legs, lifting him up and dropping him headfirst onto the top turnbuckle! The crowd boos this, and Van Siclen grabs his head in pain, backing up a couple of steps -- and right into a rollup pin attempt by Toxxic! "ONE!" "TWO - NO!" Van Siclen kicks out with ease, rolling back into a standing position as Toxxic gets to his feet, and the fans begin applauding for what they assume will be the Indy Applause Stance™, but everybody knows how much respect the Indy Applause Stance™ gets in the SWF. The two men charge at each other, and Toxxic ducks underneath Van Siclen's outstretched arm, charging at the ropes opposite Van Siclen! Mike whirls around, having expected this, and as Toxxic comes back he gets nailed in the face by a spinning wheelkick from Van Siclen! "Van Siclen knocking some sense into Toxxic!" Comet cries, "and you can tell that he came ready to fight tonight!" "It's going to suck when he loses, then," Riley says. Toxxic hits the mat, and Van Siclen reaches down and grabs Toxxic by the scruff of his neck, lifting him to his feet. Van Siclen grabs Toxxic, and the two men lock up once more, but this time Toxxic grabs the upper hand, grabbing Van Siclen by the wrist and going to the side, locking Mike in an arm wrench. Van Siclen, however, has seen this move countless times before and knows how to reverse it, using his arm to pull Toxxic right into a huge knee to the stomach! The champion doubles over, letting go of Van Siclen’s arm, and Mike quickly takes advantage, putting Toxxic into a standing headscissors! Van Siclen quickly lifts Toxx up, parallel to his body in piledriver position, the set-up to Van Siclen’s Riot Act! “This match could be over far quicker than any of us imagined!” Comet calls, "and so could Toxxic's World title reign!" Indeed, Van Siclen holds Toxxic there for a few moments, a suave smile on his face as he savours what he anticipates is a title-winning moment -- but Toxxic takes advantage of Van Siclen’s pause, wrapping his legs around the Spectacle’s neck and arching his back, snapping Mike over with a hurricanrana! The crowd boos this move from Toxxic, showing their support of Van Siclen as Toxxic gets to his feet, pacing around and trying to catch his breath. Breath caught, Toxxic turns back to Van Siclen, grabbing the Spectacle by the hair and lifting him to his feet. Toxxic grabs Van Siclen by the arm, looking to whip him into the ropes, but Mike reverses slickly and whips Toxxic into the turnbuckle again! The champ hits hard, and Van Siclen walks to the corner with bad intentions on his mind, stopping short of Toxxic and scratching his nuts – before rearing back and slapping the Straight-Edger in the face with the same hand! “YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!” "That's the world champion!" Riley cries, shocked at the lack of respect. "You deserve to have your career ended tonight, you worthless piece of (bleep)!" Toxxic's face snaps over to the side, and the champ is obviously seething from the show of disrespect from Van Siclen! Toxxic charges at Mike, looking for some vengeance -- only to get lifted high into the air by the Spectacle, then dropped neck-first against the top rope with a vicious stungun! The crowd cheers as Van Siclen grins, finally relaxing a little bit in the ring as he grabs Toxxic by the scruff of the neck once more, lifting him to his feet. “Van Siclen has targeted the head and neck of Toxxic early,” Comet says, “possibly trying to recreate the strategy that produced so many big wins earlier in his career!” "Don't forget 'blatant disrespect and humiliation', Comet," Riley snarls. "That's part of this new strategy too, obviously." Van Siclen keeps a hold on Toxxic's neck, pulling the champion's face close to his own and spitting venomous words in his face, showing the utter hate and resentment that has built up for the Brit since his debut in the federation. Toxxic winces, Van Siclen's vice-like grip on his neck obviously doing some damage, but Mike shows no signs of letting go, dragging Toxxic over to a corner and slamming him face-first into the turnbuckle! The crowd is shocked and silent, but this doesn’t get to Van Siclen as he continues the onslaught on Toxxic, grabbing the champion by the arm and whipping him hard into the ropes! Toxxic hits them hard, coming back fast and furious at the challenger, who swings his arm out in the hopes of catching Toxxic with a lariat -- but Toxxic ducks underneath it, hitting the opposite ropes! The straight-edger comes flying back at Van Siclen, obviously looking for some big move, but Van Siclen times his spin perfectly and clubs Toxxic in the side of the face with a huge forearm! The 'hot commodity' hits the mat hard, grabbing his neck in pain, and Van Siclen dives on top for the cover! “OONE!” “TWOO!” “THR -- NO!” Toxxic kicks out at two! “Toxxic makes the kickout,” Comet says, “but he’s obviously in a bad way right here -- Van Siclen has come out swinging tonight, and from the way Toxxic has been fighting back you'd think that he had already given up!” "I take deep personal offence to that, Comet," Riley says, "and would like to point out that no matter what you say, you know it'll suck when Mike Van Siclen has to give his retirement speech tonight." Van Siclen gets to his feet, his eyes glittering as he grabs Toxxic by the scruff of the neck once more, lifting the champion to his feet and whipping him hard into the ropes! Toxxic comes back strong, however, rolling over and looking to catch him with a spinning heel kick… ... but Mike catches him in midair! The crowd boos as Van Siclen grins, maneuvering Toxxic onto his shoulder and leaping forward, dropping the straight-edger on his back with a stiff powerslam! Mike grabs the fallen champion, lifting him to his feet and grabbing him by the arm, looking to whip Toxx into the ropes -- but the champion scores a reversal, using all of his might to send the challenger into the turnbuckle! The crowd boos Toxxic's sudden burst of offence, as the champion grins, walking with SWAGGER~! over to Van Siclen and reaching back with his left hand, looking at it quickly before bringing it across the left side of Mike’s face with a huge slap! "TOXX - IC SUCKS!" "TOXX - IC SUCKS!" "And that's payback for earlier, you bitch," Toxxic snarls at Van Siclen, not showing much respect for Van Siclen as he nails the challenger in the face with a nasty European uppercut! The challenger grabs his face in pain, slumping down the turnbuckle a bit, but Toxxic grabs him by the air and savagely lifts him to a standing position, sending another European uppercut into the jaw of Van Siclen! Van Siclen again grabs his jaw in pain as Toxxic backs out of the corner, giving Mike enough rope to hang himself, if you will! The Spectacle stumbles out of the corner, obviously in a bit of pain, and as he stumbles out Toxxic grabs him by the head, jumping into the air and driving him face-first onto his knee! The crowd boos this move as Van Siclen stands straight up, grabbing his face in pain -- but Toxxic is right there to pounce once more, grabbing Van Siclen around the neck and bringing him down with a swift DDT! “Sobering Thought from Toxxic," Riley says, "and it looks like Van Siclen's career will be over right here!" Toxxic, indeed, dives on top for the pin, and Nicolai Soapdish makes the count... "OOONE!" "TWOOO!" "THRE -- TWO COUNT!" Van Siclen gets the shoulder up, and Toxxic gets to his feet, grabbing Van Siclen by the hair and lifting him to his feet as well. Toxxic knees Van Siclen in the stomach, doubling him over, and then wraps one arm around Van Siclen’s neck to put him in a side headlock. Toxxic then turns, turning Van Siclen’s head with him to put the challenger into neckbreaker position. Toxxic pauses for a few moments, cockily allowing the tension to build up before breaking Mike's neck... but Mike DON'T WANT DRAMA~, and he whips his leg back... *CHING!* ...catching the champion in the nuts with a back kick! The crowd pops for the move as Toxxic lets go of the neck hold, clutching his genitals. Van Siclen whips around, grabbing Toxxic's left arm and bringing it around the right side of his face. Van Siclen grabs Toxxic's right arm, now, bringing it around the left side of the champion's face, putting the straight-edger into a standing crossface! The crowd pops, knowing what's to come as Van Siclen drops to his left knee, bringing Toxxic down and impaling the champion's neck on his right knee with a Crossface Black! "Van Siclen with the Crossface Black," Comet cries, "and his onslaught on Toxxic's neck continues!" “Yeah, yeah, Comet,” Riley says. “It'll really suck when Van Siclen loses, won't it?" Van Siclen leaps on top of Toxxic, looking for the pin! "OOOONE!" "TWOOOO!" "THREE -- TWO COUNT!" Toxxic gets a shoulder up, and Van Siclen looks down at the champion, grabbing him and lifting him to his feet. Toxxic clumsily plants both hands into Van Siclen's midsection, shoving him out of the way for a few moments so that he may regain his bearings! Van Siclen stumbles away, and as Toxxic comes back to he begins looking for the challenger... and he finds the man he’s looking for putting his head under his jaw! Van Siclen sets Toxxic up for the sitout jawbreaker, and looks ready to hit it when Toxxic reaches forward, wrapping his hands around Van Siclen’s neck! Mike moves back suddenly, trying to get away from the neckhold, but Toxxic holds firm to hte neckhold, holding the Spectacle out in front of him by the neck... and then Toxxic, possibly slightly CRAZY, drops a headbutt right between Van Siclen's eyes! "Oh my GOD!" Riley and Comet chorus. Toxxic pulls away, and we can already see the effects of the move by Toxxic, as blood is flowing down Van Siclen's nose like lava flowing down the side of Mt. St. Helens! Toxxic grabs Van Siclen, once again planting a knee into his stomach to double the challenger over. As Van Siclen bends over, Toxxic runs to the ropes, jumping onto the second one and using it as a springboard, turning around in midair and grabbing Van Siclen around the neck, spinning around (like a TORNADO~) and driving Van Siclen headfirst into the mat with a tornado DDT! "Toxxic is definitely back on top in this matchup," Riley says. "I'd feign surprise, but I'm not surprised." Toxxic bounces to his feet, quite on fire now, and he grabs Van Siclen by the hair, lifting him to his feet. The crowd boos as Toxxic goes behind Van Siclen, wrapping one arm around the Spectacle's head to put him into an inverted headlock. The crowd boos even louder as Toxxic stands up to his full height, holding Van Siclen in place for a few moments... before snapping him back, bringing Van Siclen down back-first onto his knee! "There's the first half of the Detoxx," Riley calls, "and Toxxic is absolutely killing Mike Van Siclen's back! He's not just going to beat Van Siclen, he's going to beat him at his own game!" The crowd boos as Van Siclen clutches his back in pain, and Toxxic grins, getting to his full height again and keeping Van Siclen in the inverted headlock, setting him up for the second half of the Detoxx. Toxxic grins, raising his free arm to taunt the crowd, who boo him raucously! "TOX - XIC SUCKS!" "TOX - XIC SUCKS!" Toxxic grins, acknowledging the boos... but he's caught by surprise as Van Siclen snakes his left arm around the champion's neck! Toxxic's surprise causes him to loosen up his grip on the challenger's neck, and Van Siclen takes advantage by driving his right elbow into Toxxic's midsection! The crowd pops as Toxxic loosens up the hold even more, and Van Siclen grins, shifting his left arm so that it's wrapped around Toxxic's neck in front facelock position, and Van Siclen grins as he charges forward, leaping into the air and almost floating for a few seconds before driving the champion headfirst into the mat with a NASTY~ bulldog! "Bulldog from Van Siclen," Comet says, "and who's beating who at which game now? Toxxic's neck is going to be jello by the end of this match!" The impact causes Toxxic to bounce over onto his back, and Van Siclen drops down, putting a forearm into Toxxic's neck as he looks for the pin! "OOOOONE!" "TWOOOOO!" "TH -- TWO COUNT!" Toxxic gets the shoulder up through Van Siclen's weight, and the crowd boos slightly. Van Siclen heaves himself to his feet, his eyes glinting as he lifts the straight-edger back to his feet as well. Van Siclen grins, and he grabs Toxxic by the arms, whipping the straight-edge sensation into the turnbuckle! Toxxic goes flying, but as he approaches the turnbuckle he leaps into the air, landing precariously on the top rope and using it as a springboard to JUMP OFF~, whirling around in midair and taking Van Siclen to the mat with a flying forearm to the face! Van Siclen and Toxxic both land on the mat, the forearm opening Van Siclen's gash even more as blood now freely drips from the Spectacle's face. Toxxic lay on his stomach as well, seemingly trying to catch his breath... ...but he rolls over onto his back, scrunching up into a ball and kipping up! The crowd boos this as Toxxic lands on his feet, spreading his arms wide and walking with swagger around the ring before coming back around to Van Siclen, lifting the Spectacle to his feet. "Van Siclen looks to take advantage of Toxxic further," Riley says, "but instead, the superior wrestler takes the scrub out with the role reversal. It's really going to suck for you when Mike loses, Comet." Toxxic, now, looks to do something completely different, as he raises his leg high and drives it into the left knee of Van Siclen! The Spectacle stumbles a bit, not expecting this, and Toxxic grins, taking advantage by again raising his leg and driving it into the left knee of Van Siclen! This time Van Siclen falls to this knee, trying to get some rest as Toxxic turns away from Van Siclen, smile wide on his face as he runs to the ropes, coming back hard at Van Siclen and jumping into the air, looking to step onto Van Siclen's right knee... ... but Van Siclen lifts his right leg up, using it to kick Toxxic in the left shin! This halts Toxx's momentum dead, and he falls to the mat, grabbing his left leg in pain. Van Siclen gets to his feet, seemingly fine, and now he raises his leg high into the air... and drives his boot right into the neck of Toxxic! The crowd roars out for the move, as Toxxic grabs his neck in pain, covering his head to try and protect himself. Van Siclen throws in another stomp to the head for good measure before turning away from Toxxic, going to the turnbuckle and climbing it very methodically, soaking in the cheers of a suddenly VERY fired-up crowd! "M - V - S!" "M - V - S!" Toxxic, hearing the chants, rises to one knee, looking to see what all the ruckus is about. He rises to his full height, turning and staring Van Siclen dead in the eyes for a brief moment before the Spectacle leaps off the turnbuckle! The crowd roars as he extends his legs, looking as though he's sitting in the most comfortable chair in the world as he lands on Toxxic's shoulders, wrapping his legs around the champion's head and falling back, whipping Toxxic over with a flying headscissors! Van SIclenholds on for the bridge... "OOOOOONE!" "TWOOOOOO!" "THREE -- NO!" Toxxic JUST gets the shoulders up, and the crowd roars, fired up by the uncharacteristic move from Van Siclen! "Holy Superhero Jesus," Comet says, "in all the time I've called Mike Van Siclen matches, I have NEVER seen him use a flying headscissors! He's pulling out all the stops tonight -- and DARN that was pretty!" "Yeah, well, he's still going to lose, so who cares?" Van Siclen gets off of Toxxic, rubbing the blood out of his face and eyes as he reaches down and grabs Toxxic, lifting the champion to his feet. The fired-up crowd lets their voices be heard, and Van Siclen raises one arm in recognition before turning back to Toxxic, grabbing the straight-edger by the arm and whipping him hard into the ropes. Toxxic comes flying back at the Spectacle, who looks like he's prepping for a lariat -- but at the last second Van Siclen GETS DOWN~ into the back bodydrop setup, catching Toxxic off-guard, and the champion rolls over Mike's back! Van Siclen stands up to his full height, grabbing Toxxic by the feet so that the straight-edger dangles off his back, his head pointed straight down at the canvas! Toxxic wisely covers his head with both arms, hoping that they will cushion the impact as Van Siclen holds Toxxic there for a few moments... "M - V - S!" "M - V - S!" ... waiting for JUST the right moment before... "M - V - S!" "M - V - S!" ... he sits out, driving Toxxic headfirst into the mat with the Van Slaminator! The crowd goes BANANA~ as Van Siclen lets go of Toxxic's legs, allowing the straight-edger to tumble off his back, limp like Bobby Riley looking at a woman! Van Siclen rolls over, getting on top of Toxxic and looking for the pin! "VAN SLAMINATOR! This could be all!" Comet cries. "Yeah, but... it won't be," Riley shoots back, as Nicolai Soapdish counts... "OOOOOOONE!" "TWOOOOOOO!" "THREEEEEEE..." "TWO COUNT!" "OOOOOOOOH!" Van Siclen can't believe it, but the proof is in the puddin', and the puddin' shows Toxxic with his shoulder up! Van Siclen gets to his feet, obviously a bit upset as he wipes the blood out of his face once more, grabbing Toxxic by the scruff of the neck and lifting him to his feet once more. "Van Siclen pulls out the Van Slaminator for a VERY close two count!" Comet says. "It was close, but no cigar," Riley says. "And it was no cigar because Mike is going to lose." Van Siclen grabs Toxxic by the arm, whipping him into the ropes yet again! This time, Van Siclen whirls around, standing still and just waiting for Toxxic to come back so he can lay him out some way some how, and as Toxxic comes rocketing back Van Siclen swings his arm out, looking for the LARIATO... but, naturellement, Toxxic ducks underneath it, charging at the other side of the ring! Toxxic hits the opposite ropes, charging back at a slightly confused Van Siclen, who turns around to find his legs cut out from under him by a soccer-style tackle from Toxxic! The crowd boos the maneuver as Van Siclen falls straight on his face, and Toxxic gets to his feet quickly, a sneer on his face. Van Siclen gets to his feet under his own power, but he's stumbling around a bit, obviously off a beat. Toxxic takes advantage of this, running to the ropes once more. He comes up behind Van Siclen and quickly puts him in a chickenwing. He uses the momentum to swing himself around and grab Van Siclen's other arm in an underhook, and hops into the air, his momentum swinging him around as sits out, driving Van Siclen headfirst into the mat with the Toxxic Shock Syndrome! "That move is in Toxxic's entrance video being done to the same man!" Riley cries out. "This is another one for the entrance video, subtitled 'Toxxic Makes Mike Van Siclen Retire'!" Toxxic grins, rolling Van Siclen onto his back and looking for the pin... "OOOOOOOONE!" "TWOOOOOOOO!" "THREEEEEEEE!" "TWO COUNT!" "YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!" "Van Siclen kicks out!" Comet cries. "Prolonging the inevitable, Comet. Prolonging the inevitable." "M - V - S!" "M - V - S!" Toxxic gets to his feet, the look of disbelief on his face plain to see as he screams out his frustrations to the nobody that cares. He grabs Van Siclen by the hair, lifting the Spectacle to his knees. He watches Mike carefully, waiting for the challenger to get to his full height, and as he does the champion runs up the ropes, using the top rope as a springboard to backflip off of! He extends an arm, looking to wrap it around Van Siclen's neck and take him down with an Intoxxication that would surely end the match... ... but nobody's home! Van Siclen darts out of the way, and Toxxic finds himself feet away from being spiked into the mat! Quickly, he rolls over in midair, landing uneasily on his feet with Van Siclen behind him! Mike wastes no time in charging forward, grabbing Toxxic in a front headlock with his right arm as he runs forward, leaping into the air and AGAIN driving Toxxic headfirst into the mat with a bulldog! The crowd roars as Van Siclen holds onto the neck long enough to situate his body, as he puts his right leg over Toxxic's midsection, straddling the champion in camel clutch position! The crowd shrieks in delight, knowing what is to come as Van Siclen reaches forward, linking his wrists on the bridge of Toxxic's nose and pulling back as hard as he can, trying to break Toxxic's neck! The crowd erupts, screaming at Toxxic to tap out as Van Siclen looks almost animalistic, a vicious expression under his blood-soaked features, his hair wild and messy in his face as he pulls back on the screaming Toxxic, yelling at the champion to tap out! "THIS IS THE CARDINAL SIN CLUTCH!" Comet cries. "Tag matches cut down on the efficiency of submissions, but this was the biggest move in Mike Van Siclen's arsenal for a LONG time, and he's spent the entire match building up to it!" "We've seen one person escape it, and that man went on to become the most feared World champion of all time," Riley says. "Tonight, we see that pedigree continue, as Toxxic breaks this hold in record time!" Van Siclen is screaming, and the crowd is chanting. "TAP!" "TAP!" "TAP!" "TAP!" "TAP!" And so on and so forth. The crowd's chanting continues as referee Nicolai Soapdish gets down next to Toxxic, asking the straight-edger if this is the time, if he wants to give up -- but Toxxic is on a mission to prove people wrong, and you don't prove anyone wrong by tapping out! Toxxic screams out a "NO!", and this "NO!" infuriates Van Siclen, who increases the pressure on Toxxic's neck, trying desperately to get him to tap out and end this match! Blood continues to stream down Van Siclen's face as Toxxic continues his refusal to give up, but now his hand is hovering over the mat! "He looks like a broken man, Bobbo!" Comet yells. "He looks ready to give up, and live to fight another day!" The hand continues to hover, as Toxxic contemplates through the pain everything that tapping out would mean... "Broken man my ASS, Comet!" Riley barks back, for the first time showing some nerves. "He can break this hold. He WILL break this hold! Toxxic won't let a LOSER like Mike Van Siclen become World champion!" Au contraire, though, Robert! Toxxic looks ready to slap the mat, and his hand begins shaking, as the fans scream even louder at Toxxic to "TAP!" in the hopes that he'll finally just listen! Through all of the pain it looks like Toxxic is beginning to look at tapping as the right choice, and who could blame him, after all the punishment he's taken, if he just gave up? "This is EPIC, Robert!" Comet cries. "If Mike Van Siclen gets Toxxic to tap out!..." "He WON'T, Comet! Toxxic will NOT tap out, not to Mike Van Siclen!" Toxxic's hand is shaking furiously now, as tapping looks like his only option. We can see his eyes roll up, seeing the ropes close to him. But are they within grabbing distance? With one last dying lunge, knowing that it'll be over if he can't grasp the ropes this one time, Toxxic extends his arms as far as he can, and the 20,000+ crowd holds its breath... "BREAK IT UP!" ... and they let it out in one collective sigh, as the bloody warrior gets to his feet, breaking the hold and screaming at Soapdish. The crowd's sigh is almost unmeasurable, and Toxxic lay grasping the ropes, panting for breath like an overworked dog, thankful for this miracle that saved his belt, if only temporarily. "He broke the hold! He broke the hold!" "Correction, he used a loophole to force Mike Van Siclen to let go of the hold!" "Toxxic used his cunning to score a HUGE moral victory over Mike Van Siclen, and one could argue that momentum favors him now!" This could indeed be argued, as a much less energetic but significantly more furious Mike Van Siclen goes over to Toxxic, roughly lifting him to his feet. The crowd can sense Van Siclen's rage, and the Spectacle jams his knee into Toxxic's midsection, causing Toxxic to double over and begin coughing, trying to get air back into his lungs. The Spectacle now grabs Toxxic around the midsection, heaving him up into position for a piledriver. Van Siclen holds Toxxic around the midsection, and the champions' legs are up around Van Siclen's head as Mike steps over Toxxic's legs, locking the straight-edger in position. Mike stands there for a few moments, the crowd coming alive again as Van Siclen looks for the Riot Act!... ... and he gets kicked square in the face by Toxxic! The shock and pain causes Van Siclen to drop Toxxic, clutching his face in pain. Toxx lands with Van Siclen still holding him in a standing headscissors, but this is perfect, as Toxxic wraps his arms around Van Siclen's legs and stands up to his full height! The crowd begins raucously booing, as Toxxic stands up to his full height, holding Van Siclen in position for a Van Slaminator! The crowd begins booing, and Van Siclen struggles against the hold, but his struggles are futile as Toxxic leaps into the air, adding an extra two feet of impact when he spikes Van Siclen into the mat with a jumping Van Slaminator! "JUMPING VAN SLAMINATOR!" Riley cries, physically leaping out of his seat. "This is IT, Comet!" The crowd is already booing as Toxxic lies back, holding Van Siclen's legs to create a bridge as Nicolai Soapdish counts. "OOOOOOOOONE!" "For Holy Superhero Jesus' sake, Mike, KICK OUT!" Comet cries. "TWOOOOOOOOO!" "CRACK OPEN THE CHAMPAGNE IN THE REVOLUTION ZERO LOCKER ROOM!" Riley yells. "THREEEEEEEEE!" "NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" *DING DING DING* The crowd is dead. "Ladies and gentlemen, your winner, and STILL the S - W - F WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION... TOXXXXXXXXXXXXXXIC!" The crowd begins booing as "Rookie" hits the speakers, and the crowd can barely bring itself to boo after the emotional rollercoaster they've just ridden. Referee Soapdish retrieves the belt for a weakened Toxxic, who gets to his feet and holds the belt high in the air. He looks down at Mike Van Siclen's fallen, bloodied body with the utmost disdain... ... and spits on it. And now the crowd will boo. "TOXX - IC SUCKS!" "TOXX - IC SUCKS!" "Toss me a mic!" The ring attendant obliges, and Toxxic holds it dear, his music dying down as he begins to speak. "Mike, do you understand now? The Revolution can't be stopped, no matter how hard you tried. And now your career is OVER, Mike... have I proved you wrong yet? Have I..." "And then you gotta BREATHE!" "YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!" "Urban Legend" Todd Cortez comes charging out from the back, his eyes blazing with fury as he slides into the ring. Toxxic turns to face him, not wanting a fight, but the uberpissed Cortez can't be stopped, and he grabs Toxxic around the neck! His eyes almost bulge out of his head from the fury, and the Urban Legend raises Toxxic high into the air... before slamming him down with a huge powerbomb! "URBAN ASSAULT! URBAN ASSAULT!" Comet cries. "Mike Van Siclen may be retired, but he will NOT be disrespected!" Todd Cortez grabs Van Siclen, helping his friend to his feet and supporting him as Toxxic rolls to the outside! The rest of Revolution Zero is already out behind Toxxic, making sure that he doesn't suffer another cheap shot from either member of the Boulevard, but the fans ignore them, concentrating more on the two men in the ring. "Popular" by Nada Surf starts over the loudspeakers, and even through defeat, Mike Van Siclen can look up at the fans and hear his name. "M - V - S!" "M - V - S!" "M - V - S!" ======================== SWF Storm, October 8th, 2004 An SWF Production All Rights Reserved ========================

‘Welcome to SWF Late Night. The following broadcast may contain strobe lighting effects, strong language and images that may be unsuitable for younger viewers, particularly if they have an aversion to big sweaty men in skintight shorts.’ FIVE… FOUR… THREE… TWO… ONE… …SWF STORM IS ON THE AIR!! *BOOOOM!! BANG! BANG! BANG! BUH-BUH-BUH-BOOOOOOOOOOOOM!!* “RRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHH!” “Welcome, Citizens, to the SOLD OUT Rose Garden in Portland, Oregon!” Cyclone Comet booms as the cameras pan around, taking in signs like ‘BORT!’, ‘I’M MADDIXTED TO MEGAN!’ and ‘I CAME TO SEE THE UNCLE FILTHY SHOW!!’. “We are coming off an amazing show on Smarkdown which saw the debuts of no less than three new SWF superstars, as well as a 6-person tag match which saw the team of Hollywood Boulevard and Andrea Montgomery take on Spike Jenkins, Max King and Toxxic!” “And needless to say, Toxxic’s team won,” Riley interjects. “Perhaps Robert, but the fall of Revolution Zero also began as Sean Davis lost his Hardcore Title to Chris Fury,” Comet counters, “and tonight Davis and Jenkins have to defend their tag belts against the team of Fury and David Cross!” “Fury and Cross?” Riley asks. “Christ, what’s their tag name going to be - ‘Really Really Angry’?” “But biggest of all,” Comet continues, “tonight we will see Mike Van Siclen take on the World Heavyweight Champion Toxxic in a Title vs Career match-up, after the two men had a heated exchange in the ring on Smarkdown!” “Oh yes,” Riley chuckles gleefully. “Tell me Comet, do you think that Mike can win?” “Well, with his career on the line I believe that Citizen Van Siclen will pull out the effort of a lifetime and defeat the so-called Straight-Edge Sensation-” But Comet is cut off by the Smarktron going white and the opening chord of ‘Rookie’ by Boy Sets Fire crashing out across the Rose Garden. The screen darkens to black, and as it does jagged white letters flash up a familiar phrase: ‘PREPARE TO BE PROVED WRONG…’ [“You knew that was coming, didn’t you?” hisses Comet.] [“I must admit, the production crew do have an unerring sense of timing,” Riley grins back.] As the guitar riff starts the black screen changes to become the top of a spiky-haired head that raises and stares out with piercing grey eyes before a lopsided grin creases the right-hand side of Toxxic's face. The bass drum starts and clips of his matches flash up - the All-Show Brawl with the Insane Luchador, the infamous Glass Jawbreaker on Aecas, dropping Nathaniel Kibagami on his head with the Caffeine Bomb and the Super Intoxxication that won him the World Title before moving onto footage - and how appropriate it is, for tonight's show - of Toxxic taking Mike Van Siclen off a balcony and through a table, the devastating landing timed to coincide with the four blast of red pyro that climb the entrance ramp before the final, stagewide eruption as the main riff starts- *BAM-BAM-BAM-bap-BOOOM!!* -that announces the arrival of the SWF's premier straight-edger! The smoke starts to drift to one side, and suddenly at the top of the entrance ramp is the familiar figure of the SWF World Champion, title belt slung over one shoulder and wearing his customised England soccer shirt - with the letters 'sXe' over the number 9 on the back - in honour of his home country playing Wales tomorrow in the World Cup Qualifiers. "Ladies and gentlemen," Funyon booms, "making his way to the ring at this time; the leader of Revolution Zero and the SWF WORLD... HEAVYWEIGHT... CHAMPION... the 'Straight-Edge Sensation'; TOXXXXXXX-IIIIIIIIIIIIIIC!!" “TOXX-IC SUCKS!” “TOXX-IC SUCKS!” The fastest-rising wrestler in SWF history reaches the ring and rolls under the bottom ropes, then springs up to his feet and calls for the microphone from Funyon. The veteran ring announcer hesitates a moment before passing it over, and 'Rookie' fades out as Toxxic cracks his neck from side to side and takes up position in the centre of the ring; one black-nailed hand resting on the World Title, weight resting on foot - completely comfortable. “Nathaniel Kibagami used to have an excerpt from the Art of War that came up before his entrance,” Toxxic begins in conversational tones. “SIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII-LENT…” “SIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII-LENT…” “I don’t remember it exactly, but it was something about being invincible,” the World Champion states, looking around. “Of course, we all know how inappropriate that turned out… nevertheless, there is another maxim of warfare that I have found useful: ‘The only risk worth taking is one that can do more damage to your enemy than to yourself’.” The Straight-Edge Sensation looks around at the Oregon crowd and grins lopsidedly. Tonight, Toxxic looks completely, supremely confident. “I don’t know if Mike Van Siclen ever heard that adage; if he did, he forgot it on Smarkdown when he challenged me to this match tonight,” Toxxic states. “You’re gambling everything on one big throw of the dice, Mike. But this isn’t the Casino Brawl, and tonight luck won’t be on your side.” “BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” “TOXX-IC SUCKS!” “TOXX-IC SUCKS!” “If you lose,” the straight-edger continues, “you have to retire from the SWF. No ifs, no buts, nothing. You will be gone, and one more obstacle in the path of the Revolution will go with you.” “BOU-LE-VARD!” “BOU-LE-VARD!” “Against this, you have to weigh your chance of defeating me and winning the World Title,” Toxxic concedes, “and that is a powerful lure to every athlete here. Not only will this mean a great deal to you Mike, due to the immense prestige of this title - you also think that by dethroning me you will somehow slow me down, that you will be able to damage the Revolution.” Toxxic stops for a moment, and the lopsided grin widens. “Unfortunately sunshine, you are dead wrong.” “BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” “You see, I am not like the other World Champions we’ve had this year,” the Straight-Edge Sensation says. “If you manage to beat me, Mike - and after all, Johnny Dangerous managed it so it’s not beyond the realms of possibility - then I will not retire. I will not go to my room and sulk. I will not go on a six-month sabbatical to AJPW. I will stay right here in the SWF, and I will fight to get this title back!.” The familiar grin has dropped from Toxxic’s face, and even the most disrespectful fans start to become aware that the Brit has finished joking around now. “If I have to go through every single bloody wrestler on this roster to get a rematch, I will do it,” Toxxic states, “and you know very well that I am capable of doing just that. I won’t care how long it might take, and if you lose the title before I get back to you - well, I’ll take you out and then move on past you to whoever has it.” “TOXX-IC SUCKS!” “TOXX-IC SUCKS!” “Ultimately, you’re gambling on a surefire loss, Mike,” Toxxic says. “If you win, I come back for you. If you lose, you sink without trace. Your risk will not pay off, and I think it will make life easier for you - and everyone else in the SWF - the sooner you understand the simple truth about me.” The Straight-Edge Sensation rakes the crowd with his grey eyes, seemingly daring any of the SWF superstars to step out and stand against him. “In the long run, you cannot beat me,” the World Champion tells the Rose Garden simply. “The best you can do… is put off losing for a little while longer.” With that, Toxxic drops the microphone to the canvas and rolls under to the ringropes before making his way up the ramp, as we: FADE OUT

Back into the Rose Garden in picturesque Portland, Oregon we swoop...to the image of a not so picturesque dumpster, left at the top of the Storm stage. Some of the crowd cheer seeing the dumpster, knowing what match is next. As suddenly, the dumpster lids fly open and a rather dis-orientated Ash Ketchum falls out of the dumpster, before stumbling off, mumbling incoherently. Comet: Oh. So that's what happened to him. Riley: Happens to the best of us Comet. To be frank, I'm impressed he managed to find something so high up the property ladder. Comet: ...as you may have guessed, the Intercontinental Television Championship is on the line next. And yes, it will be contested in a Dumpster Match, Robert! The dreaded rematch clause makes it's much-feared return, as its Landon "La Cucaracha" Maddix attempting to capture the ICTV belt for the third time...taking on the new champion, as of last week, "The Icon" Max King. Riley: Something which I KNOW Kelly Connelly is not pleased about. Comet: Robert, this rematch should settle all the controversy left over from King's title win. If Kelly doesn't like that then it's quite frankly tough luck. Riley: Well, I meant she was unhappy about the stipulation...but, yes, the match itself shouldn't be happening anyway. Dumpster or not. Comet: Regardless of her feeling, one man will be taking a trip into that dumpster here tonight. Riley: Who's idea was this anyway? Comet: Well, as Zenon is gone, I assume it's one Suicide King's idea. Riley: ...man, I can't WAIT for this one Comet! What a match this'll be! "PREPARE...FOR...LANDON!" ...WAAAAAHHHHH... *DUM DUM* "YEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!" The crowd erupt as through the curtains bounds Landon "La Cucaracha" Maddix, stopping abruptly as he spots the blood red dumpster sitting to the right of the curtains. Slowly a wry smile creeps over his face though, as he takes in the cheers filling the air. Breaking away from his gaze, Maddix finally starts to stride down the aisle, with Megan Skye conspicuous by her absence. Funyon: Ladies and gentlemen, the following contest...sponsored by Laidlaw...is for the SWF INTERCONTINENTAL-TELEVISION CHAMPIONSHIP...and is to be contested under Dumpster Match rules! The only way to win this match is to place your opponent in the dumpster provided and close BOTH lids, therefore trapping your opponent. Introducing first, the challenger. From Huron, South Dakota...he weighs in at two hundred and eighteen pounds. The former two-time ICTV Champion... LANDON "LA CUCARACHA" MAAAADDIIIIIXXXX!!! Maddix raises his arms in the air at the sound of his name, with the Portland crowd responding with cheers. Riley: I still don't understand how Maddix deserves a rematch, without earning it. Comet: Well...he's a two time champion. He had the longest ICTV Title reign since Charlie Matthews' reign ended in February. Not to mention the nature of which he lost the belt. Plus, he beat Stryke on Lockdown... Riley: Oh, I must have missed that memo about beating Stryke meaning something suddenly. Comet: Ba-zing. Into the ring rolls Maddix, removing his "Cheat 2 Win" t-shirt and tossing it into the crowd which starts a stampede in the fifth and sixth rows. Funyon: And his oppo... "Woah, woah, woah...stop right there Funbags!" wails Kelly Connelly, as she steps through the curtains with her own microphone to the jeers of the crowd. "You should know the drill by now. Ladies and gentlemen of Portland...shut your mouths, and stand up on your feet. Stand up! As I present to you the pride of Philadelphia and the reigning Intercontinental Television Champion of the WORLD! It's time to take out the trash with "The Icon"... MAAAAAAXXXXX KIIIIIINNGGG!!!!" No pyro, what with Kelly standing directly on top of where they'd explode and all, as "Superstar" by Saliva hits and Max King emerges through the entrance with his ICTV Title belt draped proudly over his shoulder. But before he can even think about posing and posturing, out of the ring slides Landon Maddix with serious intent in his eyes as he begins to charge back up the ramp! Quickly Kelly makes herself scarse, as King just as hurriedly removes his title belt from his shoulder and prepares to use it as a weapon. Maddix continues running in undaunted, reading the title shot coming and ducking under it. A confused King weilds around and gets lamped with a forearm, and a second...and a third, which sends the title belt flying out of King's hands as meanwhile from the ring, referee Sexton Hardcastle watches on...and remembers that a match needs an opening bell. *DING DING DING!* Comet: I guess these two men aren't going to want to start this match in the ring, so this one is underway on the rampway! Riley: And why not? No disqualifications, no countouts...and the dumpster is up on the rampway anyway. They're going to get up there eventually. With King now reeling, Maddix quickly starts to follow up on his forearms with a series more, each forearm he hits seeming to stagger him even more than the last. King finds something from somewhere though, driving a knee into Maddix's solar plexus. Another knee finds it's way deep into Maddix's gut, before King grabs the challenge by the arm and looks for an irish whip. Maddix reverses it however, sending King forwards and hard head-first into a steel part of the stage set-up! King's head bounces off the steel, sending him staggering backwards into Maddix grasp. A quick knee weakens up King, enough for Maddix to irish whip King again...this time to the right, and face-first into the side of the dumpster! A dull thud fills the air, drawing gasps from the crowd as King flops backwards. Meanwhile, Maddix's gaze darts around the stage, falling on the entrance way which he steps through towards backstage. Riley: Wait...where's...is Maddix running away? Comet: I sincerely doubt that Robert. As King slowly starts to get to his knees, Kelly quickly scurries over to check on her man. But she doesn't stay long, as moments later Landon Maddix steps back through the curtains...carrying with him a metal trash can... ...and a small stepladder. Comet: Well, that solves one problem. That stepladder will certainly make placing King in the dumpster that bit easier. Dumping the stepladder down on the stage, Maddix re-adjusts his grip on the trash can and starts to stalk over the dazed King. But King isn't quite as dazed as he makes out to be and lunges forward, spearing Maddix to the stage with a stiff double leg takedown. Only for Maddix to grab the trash can before it can fly off. With Maddix down, King looks to mount Landon and fire away with some punches...but by then, Maddix has the trash can back in his hands and swings with it... *DOOF!* ...connecting over King's head and sending another tinny echo through the air. The force sends King falling backward and rolling off down the ramp. Kelly can only look on in horror as her man continues to roll and roll, seemingly unable to stop himself, as Maddix pulls himself back up. Tossing the trash can to the side, Maddix begins to follow down the ramp as King finally comes to a stop at the bottom of the rampway. King is dis-orientated, staggering around as he gets to his feet. But he manages to find his way to the solace of the ring, rolling in and taking the opportunity to regain some of his bearings. Comet: Well, I question the wisdom of this. King can't win the match in the ring. Riley: He also can't lose it in the ring. Besides...he had little choice of where he was goin' once the rollin' got startin'. Comet: ...right. Maddix finally reaches the ring and rolls in too, meeting King in the middle of the ring with a quick boot to the gut before whipping King into the corner. Hitting the buckles, the already groggy King staggers out of the ring, as Maddix hits the ropes and launches back with a flying forearm! Down goes King, with Maddix popping right back up and encouraging King to do the same. Sure enough up staggers King, with Landon quickly back on the offensive with a stiff forearm. King tries to retaliate with a right hand, but Maddix ducks and responds with another forearm. That one drops King to his knee, but the ICTV Champion fights back up and swings with another right hand...only for Maddix to duck and weave away from the punch, this time shooting for a leg. He gets one, but the other leg just as quickly finds Maddix's ribs with a kick! Riley: There we go! Maddix needs to hit and move against King, not try to out-wrestle him. We know that doesn't work, we've seen it before. Away rolls Maddix, quickly getting to his feet and charging back at King, this time taking a decapitating clothesline for his troubles! King shakes the cobwebs off as Maddix pulls himself back up, but takes a second clothesline from the recovering King. That clothesline takes a lot out of the challenger, but he pulls himself to his feet anyway, with The Icon quickly in to meet him with a right hand. Into the corner slumps the challenger, a small cut already opened up on the bridge of his nose which King targets with another straight right hand. King then pulls Maddix out of the corner, taking him over with a textbook vertical suplex. "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" In the meantime, Kelly Connelly is making his way back down the aisle...carrying with her the stepladder which was brought out earlier by Maddix. Seeing what Kelly is doing, King finally breaks into a smile. A smile which doesn't last long though, as Maddix catches King making the cardinal sin of turning your back on an opponent, leaping over the back of King and driving his face into the canvas with The Throwback maneuver! Comet: That caught Citizen King by surprise! And the irony is, the distraction was caused by King's manager Kelly Connelly. King head bounces off the mat, but he has little time to react to the effects of the move before Maddix hooks on a front facelock and pulls King up to his knees. From there he releases the front facelock, to launch a flurry of right hands on Max. But as he does, Kelly Connelly sees her chance and gives a signal to the bobbing head of Max King as she climbs up onto the apron and slides the stepladder into the ring. Whever King gets the memo or not, it doesn't matter, as Maddix follows up the punches with a dropkick to the face which knocks Max the heck out! And with King laying unconscious on the canvas, Maddix has the chance to turn around and spot the stepladder before King can get the chance to. Riley: Oh no... Comet: Kelly's done it again. She's putting her own man in danger. Riley: Not intentionally! Comet: Well, obviously. It's more a case of incompetency, if you ask me. Unable to hide the smile from his face as he sees the stepladder and hears the cheers of the Portland crowd, Maddix swaggers over to the weapon and picks it up off the mat. As he does, King is beginning to come back around. So Maddix wastes little time in setting up the stepladder, which is only about the height of the top rope. Landon looks at the stepladder curiously, not too impressed by it's side. But like a fat hooker, he decides it'll have to do, as King is getting slowly back to his feet. Quickly Maddix scoots up to the top of the stepladder, taking a moment to steady his balance as he gets to the top. Riley: Look at this...Maddix climbing that midget ladder like it's impressive. Comet: Robert! Midget is such a...coarse word. Riley: Okay, 'vertically challenged' ladder. Either way, Maddix would still only be up to Janus' chin at the moment. King finally reaches his feet, turning and looking mighty surprised to see Maddix standing over him on a small ladder. And as he pauses and takes a double take, that gives Maddix the time to dive off the ladder with a Frog-body Block... ...and get caught by King... "SHI - IIIIIIIII..." ...and SLAMMED to the canvas in mid-curse, with authority!! Comet: Oh my, what a falling slam! All of King's two hundred fifty pounds crushing Maddix into the canvas! The crowd gasp as the challenger's back arches from the pain, with King getting back to his feet and smiling broadly as he looks down on Maddix. Reaching forwards, King folds the ladder back up and casually pulls it over so it topples forward, falling on top of Maddix's ribs! There it stays, as King looks to the outside and calls for something from Kelly. Quickly she launches into action as Maddix tries to squirm from underneath the ladder, finding that hard to do though, as King presses his foot down on the steel. Kelly meanwhile reaches the timekeeper's table, ordering the timekeeper up and tossing his chair into the ring. King quickly retrieves the chair, stomping Maddix in the head as he does, before raising the chair... *CRACK!* *CRACK!* *CRACK!* ...and nailing the ladder with the chair three hard, pain-inducing times. Each shot rocks through the ladder and into the prone body of Maddix, the third and final shot leaving Maddix sprawled on the mat with his arms flopped to the side. "MAX KING SUCKS! MAX KING SUCKS! MAX KING SUCKS!" The crowd take the opportunity to get on King's case, as he pulls the stepladder off of Maddix and props it up with one end hanging on the middle rope. Maddix pushes himself back up to his feet again, just as King turns around and delivers a hard boot to the gut. Maddix doubles over, with King instantly raising his boot once more and driving the toe-end of his boot up into the shoulder and snapping Maddix up to a vertical position for a clothesline. Only, Landon reads the clothesline and ducks under it. Not stopping, King carries on from his miss and hits the opposite ropes, charging back as Landon leaps into the air, hooking King for a Hurri-Lanrana. But King puts the brakes on, catching Maddix in mid-air! The crowd groan, but soon start screaming and wailing as King walks slowly forward... *CRAAACK!* "OOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!" ...BEFORE POWERBOMBING MADDIX ONTO THE PROPPED STEPLADDER!!! Comet: Sweet...mercy, no! Riley: Ha ha! Brilliant move by the Champ! The rope bounces Landon back off the ladder and face-first to the mat, as "The Icon" looks down on his actions with a beaming smile and his arms out-stretched, mocking the booing fans. A clearly worried Sexton Hardcastle rolls into the ring to check on Maddix. But he doesn't last long, as King chases him off and causes Hardcastle to run back to the safety of the outside. Meanwhile, Landon is clutching his ribs with a look of agony etched on his face...not helped by King dropping a knee into the lower back! Comet: ...we may need some help out here for Citizen Maddix. That was a sickening landing on that stepladder. Riley: Yeah, because the ladder was propped on the rope, the ladder snapped back too. Double whiplash for Maddix on the neck, to go with his achey breaky back. Looking down on the challenger with distain, King pulls the stepladder from off the rope and plants it on the canvas, giving it a pat for some reason as he turns back to Maddix. With his ribs hurting, Maddix isn't able to get back to his feet on his own. But King grabs a handful of hair and pulls the challenger up anyway, drilling him with a punch. Maddix falls back to one knee as King looks over his shoulder, taking in the stepladder's position as he hooks up Maddix for a vertical suplex. But instead of lifting Landon up, the ICTV Champion stops and looks out to Kelly Connelly, before pointing up at the stage with his free hand. And sure enough, off runs Kelly up the ramp. Comet: Now what is this darned corrupt woman up to? Riley: Don't you see? She's going after the dumpster! If she brings it down to the ring, the... Comet: ...then it'll be easier to throw Maddix in. I must admit, it is smart strategy from Citizen King. Even if he is getting assistance. Riley: No DQs Comet. "MAX KING SUCKS! MAX KING SUCKS! MAX KING SUCKS!" As Kelly scuttles off, King releases his hold on Maddix to soften him up with some clubbing blows across the shoulder blades, before re-hooking him for the vertical suplex. With ease he lifts the 218 pounder off the mat, pausing for a moment before falling back and dropping Maddix straight south, across the ladder with the suplex!!! "OOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHH!!!" Maddix's back hits the steel with another sickening crack, followed up with a blood curdling scream from Maddix as the pain washes over his body! In the meantime, Kelly Connelly is busy putting her back into the dumpster, trying to push it away from it's position...which takes a lot more effort than you'd expect something with wheels to take. Eventually she gets it going though, as King watches on and sees his valet in trouble, so bails out of the ring to go and help. King quickly jogs up the ramp and reaches the top, helping Kelly to turn the dumpster around and slowly the two maneuver the dumpster down the ramp. Riley: You know, I don't know why they didn't put the dumpster by the ring in the first place. Comet: Well, maybe Suicide King thought...or, maybe, hoped...that someone would place Maddix in that dumpster and push him off the stage maybe. Riley: I can believe that, yes. After much pushing and pulling, Max and Kelly ease the dumpster down the ramp without it running out of control and squashing anyone...placing it and turning it to face towards the ring. By now, Maddix is by the ropes and using them to pull himself slowly back to his feet, still grimacing from the pain his ribs are in. King makes sure the dumpster is suitably in position, looking up into the ring as he does so. Eventually the dumpster is in position, and King rolls back into the ring with Maddix in his sights as he walks across the ring and picks up the steel chair. Maddix is now back up, hurting evidentally as he backs away from the ropes... *CRACK!* ...into a SICKENING chairshot to the back! Maddix drops to his knees from the shot, as King drops the chair and runs past Landon into the ropes, bounces back with a boot aimed at Maddix's head. Maddix manages to duck somehow, but King puts the brakes on and quickly picks up the stepladder. Around turns Maddix, as King charges looking to take off Maddix's head with the ladder. But again Maddix ducks and King runs harmlessly past. The relatively light-weight ladder allows King to bounce back off the ropes, but as he charges back Maddix catches him coming with a drop-toe-hold, causing King to fall forward and onto the ladder he was holding!!! Comet: There's a counter! And what a counter, as King tastes the stepladder! The landing snaps King's head back before he slumps back onto the ladder, while Maddix backs off the ropes, coming back and dropping a Dangerous Kneedrop across the back of King's head! Rolling through, Maddix finds the strength from somewhere to run straight into the ropes and come back with a big splash on King...crushing his upper body between the splash and the ladder! Now it's Max's back that's hurting as he grabs at his upper back, while Maddix gets back to his feet. Still hurting, Landon falls to his knees as he has great trouble stumbling over towards the dumpster. Gritting his teeth through the pain, Maddix ducks through the middle rope and opens up both of the dumpster lids, to a pop from the crowd. Comet: Citizen Maddix looks ready to end this match, Robert! He's ready to put the proverbial trash out! Riley: I wish he'd take your jokes with him then. With the dumpster open and ready to accept the loser, Maddix turns back to King who is back to his feet... *SLAP!* "WHOOOOOO!!!" ...and lashing King's aching sternum with a knifedge! King gasps for breath, as Maddix quickly swings around the back of King with an enziguri kick aimed between King's shoulder blades...connecting pin-point perfectly. The smack causes Kelly to turn away weak-hearted, as again the ICTV Champion gasps and falls to his knees. Maddix doesn't want that though and pulls King back up, hooking him behind the head and looking to whip King into the dumpster...but as both men near the dumpster, King reverses the whip and throws Maddix over the top rope. Riley: YEEE...Woah! Comet: Maddix grabbing the top rope, saving himself from a 'Trash Landing'. King takes a moment to realise Maddix has saved himself and is standing on the apron, hovering over the dumpster. Once he does realise though he promptly charges in...only for Maddix to duck under King out-stretched arm and drive a shoulder into King's gut. King groans as Maddix goes deep into the gut again and then a third time, before standing back and hooking "The Icon" for a suplex. He goes for a lift...but suplexing 250 pounds with a bad back proves too much for the challenger, as he ends up re-injuring himself in the process. So Maddix releases King and clutches his back, allowing King to back off and re-catch his breath. With his breath back, Max takes a backstep before charging at Maddix with his head primed for a boot... ...but Landon avoids the boot, causing King to crotch himself over the top rope! "OOOOOOOOOOOH!" The crowd groan as King's eyes burst open as wide as saucers, while Kelly cannot bear to look again as her man is hung up by the danglies. Maddix takes the opportunity to pull himself back up by the ropes, punching King square in the jaw. Wobbling on the ropes, King teeters and totters but remains on that rope, as Maddix pops him with a second jab. Again King wobbles both towards the ring and the dumpster but hangs on. So Maddix grabs King under the arm, looking for an Exploder into the dumpster! Hooking King up, Landon looks for the throw, but King hooks the top rope with his free arm and his legs. Landon tries again...but again, King blocks before elbowing Maddix off the grip. Away staggers Maddix as King helps himself off the top rope, gingerly stepping onto the apron. Comet: These two men are in dangerous territory here. One wrong move, one slip, one foot out of place...and this match could be over. Riley: Exactly! If King were to lose his title by being thrown in a dumpster, it'd be a TRAVESTY! With both men on the apron, the dumpster below to their left, Landon comes back from by the ringpost and hits as much of a punch as he can execute. King's head snaps back, but he fires back with a right in desperation. Now both men are staggered, with both finding the energy to fire kicks at the same time. Both connect and double over from the other's kicks, with Maddix almost falling into the dumpster but grabbing the rope at the last second with his right hand. His position gives King to shoot off a back elbow...and a second. An attempt at a third is countered with a foot to the sternum though, rocking King. Riley: Look at the desperation here. These two men are fighting on the brink here! King is now the worse for wear, gasping for breath as he hovers over the dumpster dangerously...and with his opponent in prime position, Maddix runs across the apron. But King meets him with a boot to the jaw! Somehow Maddix stays on his feet, but that gives King chance to fire a leaping roundhouse around the back of the challenger's head. The dizzy Maddix falls forward into the ropes, unable to grab them as he bounces off... ...and falls into the dumpster, shooting up a fountain of old papers and other bits of trash as he lands! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" Comet: And Maddix is in the dumpster! Riley: I can't believe they actually filled it with rubbish! This is great! Maddix is buried in garbage, and I couldn't be happier... Comet: The match isn't over yet Robert. King still has to close those lids. But King is still feeling the effects, slumped up over the middle rope and coughing up a large wad of spit which he sends out towards the crowd. Kelly is screaming now, imploring her man to finish the job. He seems more concerned with his aching sternum however, so Kelly takes matter into her own hands and rushes over to the dumpster. Holding her nose, Kelly touches the first lid with her face screwed up and pushes it up and over! Riley: There's one! Kelly smiles and shuffles to the side, looking to flip the second over like the first. But before she can, Sexton Hardcastle runs over and stops her! Riley: What!?! What's he doing!?! Comet: Serving her a big, cold slice of JUSTICE~! Indeed he is! Hardcastle positions himself in between Kelly and the dumpster, ordering her that she cannot win the match for King and the crowd are going nuts! Kelly cannot believe it, giving Hardcastle a tongue lashing...for which she earns banishment, to a HE-UUUUUGE pop from the crowd! Comet: And now, Kelly Connelly is being sent to the back I think! Riley: This is ridiculous!!! It's No Disqualifications, so Kelly has every right to he...HEY! Suddenly the crowd's attentions is averted as a rather familiar looking female hops the barrier...Megan Skye! Kelly sees Megan but Sexton doesn't, and Kelly's protests fall on deaf ears. Allowing Megan to sneak past Hardcastle and reach into the back pocket of her jeans... ...and throwing a handful of powder into the eyes of the unsuspecting ICTV Champion!!! "YEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!" Riley: NO! THIS IS HIDEOUS! SHE JUST THREW HER DRUGS AT HIM! Comet: ... King grabs at his eyes, falling backwards through the ropes and back into the ring. Megan quickly scuttles around to the other side of the ring as innocently as possible, as more referees are piling down the ramp to escort the furious Kelly Connelly to the back! Still blinded, King is back on his feet but swinging at thin air, as slowly Maddix begins to emerge from the dumpster. Seeing the figure coming out from the trash, King sticks his hands out zombie-like as he reaches through the top and middle ropes for Maddix... *SMAAAASSSSHHHH!!!* ...AND GETS A BOTTLE SMASHED OVER HIS HEAD!!! "OOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!" Shards of glass fly everywhere as King grabs his forehead, before slumping back into the ring...blinded and now glassed by his challenger opponent. Comet: I think that was a glass bottle Robert! It really is amazing what you find in the trash nowadays! Riley: I can't believe this is happening. This is total injustice...TOTAL injustice! Still in the dumpster, Maddix reaches back down into the wads of trash that lay beneath him...and pulls out a can of Pepsi Max, which obviously pops the crowd. Pulling himself out of the dumpster and rolling back into the ring, Maddix is covered in various bits of smile, paper hangs from his tights and a nice ripe banana peel hangs in amongst his beshreveled hair. But, he has his Pepsi Max! Maddix stands over King with the can held high and goes to take a sip...but thinks better of it, deciding instead to give a toast to the crowd. "MAXIMUM TASTE... NO SUGAAAAAAAAAHHHH~!" *SMAAAAACK!* Comet: PEPSI MAX TO THE HEAD~! Riley: My god. It's like some weird hybrid between puro and garbage wrestling. Comet: Garburo~! Down goes King, the sturdy Pepsi Max can nailing him right between the eyes as now blood is beginning to run down from his forehead. A low groan is coming from King now as he struggles back to his feet quickly, while Maddix has tossed aside the can and now picks up a steel chair. King is dazed, half blinded and total refreshed...as he turns... *CRACK!* ...and gets LAMPED with the chair! Comet: Citizen Maddix is in total dominance now! He survived a trip into the dumpster, and he looks ready to finish "The Icon" off! King hits the deck, his forehead really beginning to bleed quite freely now, as Maddix steps over his fallen body and picks up the stepladder. The crowd are going uber nuts by now, cheering on "La Cucaracha" as he looks down on King...and then over to the dumpster, before back to King. In two minds seemingly, Landon looks to the outside and to Megan. More concerned with her man's hair care, Megan tries to point out the banana peel hanging from him. But Maddix reads that as 'dumpster', and with a smile he sets up the ladder by the ropes. Comet: Oh no...Citizen Maddix may be making a grave mistake here Robert! Riley: What's he going to do Comet? Dive in the dumpster himself? What an idiot. Comet: Well...I assume he's planning to drag King up the ladder and then push him into the dumpster below. Riley: Well that's ridiculous! That'll never work! All the same, Maddix has the ladder up now and is slowly dragging the groggy ICTV Champion over towards the ladder, placing his hands on the top rungs. King is pretty much dead-weight, but Maddix still manages to haul King up onto the middlish rungs of the ladder. Slowly King slumps over the top of the ladder and stays there, hanging precariously as for some reason, Maddix now starts to climb the ladder. He quickly reaches the top (it is a stepladder after all), grabbing King as he does so and pointing down to the dumpster to give the fans a chance to cheer. Comet: Here we go! Maddix is going to do it here! But the time wasting is too much, as King suddenly finds enough from somewhere to push Maddix and send him crashing to the mat below! "OOOOOOHHHHHHHH!!!" The crowd groan as King suddenly gets another attack of wooziness and stops for a moment, pausing to get his wits about him once more. And once he does, the first thing he sees is Landon Maddix laid out on the mat, ready to be used as a landing pad. Smiling, King adjusts himself on the top of the stepladder as he begins to ready himself for a dive. But before he knows it, Megan Skye has entered the ring and charges the ladder...managing to get enough force behind her charge to topple it... Riley: No! ...sending King and the ladder falling to the side... Riley: NO! ...AND KING CRASHING INTO THE DUMPSTER!!! "YEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!" Riley: NOOOOOO! With Hardcastle yelling at her, Megan quickly vacates the ring as meanwhile, Maddix is in a seated position...having seen what Megan did for him. His ribs are pretty screwed up, but Maddix grits his teeth and rolls out of the ring towards the dumpster all the same. Comet: King is in! King is in the dumpster, and now all Landon has to do is flip the two lids over! Riley: ... The crowd are willing Maddix on as he gingerly limps over to the dumpster, looking more like an 80 year old than a 20 year old. Maddix knows that he's just moments away from the victory though and grits his teeth through the pain, grabbing the first dumpster lid and flipping it over! "OOOOONNNNEEEEEEE!" Comet: There's one! Still there's no signs of movement in the dumpster as Maddix limps across to the other side of the dumpster...Megan metres away, already smiling from ear to ear unable to hide her glee, as Maddix flips the other lid... ...AND IT SHUTS! "YEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" *DING DING DING!* Comet: IT'S OVER! Landon Maddix REGAINS the ICTV Championship! "Megalomaniac" hits and the crowd go wild, as Maddix wearily collapses up agaisnt the side of the dumpster with his head in his hands. Funyon: Ladies and gentlemen, your winner of the match...and the NEEEEW S W F Intercontinental Television Champion...Landon "La Cucaracha" MAAAAADDIIIIXXXXXXX!! Across comes the belt from the timekeeper's table, with Megan helping Maddix up and passing him the gold, before the two share in an emotional embrace! Referee Hardcastle meanwhile climbs onto the apron, opening up the dumpster lids to give King some air. Comet: Max King's first brush with gold ends after just nine days, as we have a new Champion! Landon Maddix has equalled the record of FALLOUT~!, of Thoth and of Sacred...as he is a THREE time Intercontinental Television Champion! Is this a sign of things to come? Will Mike Van Siclen achieve his dreams of becoming World Champion, or will his career end up with Max King…in the trash! That monumental match is still to come…oh, my what a night!

“Welcome back to SWF Storm at the Rose Garden in beautiful Portland, Oregon!” Comet beams. “Have you noticed an acrid smell? I think some of the Trailblazers were in here earlier and had ‘practice’,” Riley says. “Bobby...shut up! We’ve got a stacked card, including Toxxic taking on Mike Van Siclen in a title-for-career match! But right now, it’s triple...” *BAM! BAM! BAM! BAM! BAM! BAM! BAM!* The hard bass line strikes of Muse’s “Hyper Music” signal the entrance of Canada’s best export (Barely edging out maple syrup), Ace Lezaire! “Ladies and gentlemen, the following is a triple threat match scheduled for one fall! Introducing first, from Vancouver, British Columbia, Canada, he weighs in at two hundred, thirty-four pounds, ACE LEEZAIRRE!” Funyon shouts over the booing crowd. Lezaire pauses on the stage, a cocky grin on his face. The Prodigy lifts his arms to the roof, accepting the non-existent praise as... *BOOM!* ...two tall bursts of pyro explode on either side of him. The Sovereign of Swagger walks down the ramp slowly waving to the audience, and they return the favor by jeering him. Lezaire slides under the bottom rope, pops to his feet and slumps in a corner, waiting his opponents. “Yeesh. Someone needs to tell me when Lezaire’s going to be coming to the ring, as his intro always interrupts my insightful commentary,” Comet laments. “I wish Lezaire was in every match, then. Or just replaced you completely,” Riley says. Just as the banter is picking up, all of the lights go out. *BOOM!* A huge explosion of green pyro blasts the stage, prompting the lights to come back on and Andrea Montgomery to step out to the tune of No Doubt’s “Just a Girl.” “Introducing next, from Biloxi, Mississippi, she weighs one hundred, forty-three pounds and is the number one contender for the World Heavyweight title, ANDRREA MONTGOMERRY!” Funyon roars out over the applauding crowd. Andrea makes her way down the ramp, high-fiving fans along the way before she reaches the ring. Drea leaps onto the apron, grabs the top rope, and launches herself into the squared circle. “I wonder how good the odds are for Andrea Montgomery to pull out a win here. She lost her previous match on Smarkdown, not to mention Ace Lezaire and M. Bison defeated her and Blanka in a tag match several weeks ago,” Riley notes. “I think she’s going to have a fair chance, as that tag team match was riddled with foul play on the part of Bison and Lezaire, as well as that match on Smarkdown! With Johnny Dangerous in this match, the only person to worry about in terms of cheating is Ace Lezaire,” Comet states. The lights dim, and just barely audible, a feminine voice breathes a single name. “Johnny Dangerous!” My Life With The Thrill Kill Cult’s “After the Flesh” pounds over the speakers as white smoke fills the stage. “I knew the Blazers were here! Always on the reefer, those punks,” Riley says. “Sure it’s not just Jamie Drazon?” Comet asks. “That’s a possibility, especially with Wallace in Detroit now,” Riley acquiesces. Countless strobe lights cut through the haze to show the resident covert agent standing on the stage. “And finally, from Las Vegas, Nevada, weighing two hundred, seventeen pounds, The Barracuda, JOHNNY DAANGERROUS!” Funyon booms over the cheering fans. Johnny walks down the ramp, slowly climbs into the ring, mounts the top turnbuckle and raises his arms to the fans. He doesn’t have much time to soak in the adulation, though, as Ace rushes him and lands a double ax-handle to the small of Johnny’s back! Referee Aaron Vandervort (Who may or may not be gay), swiftly calls for the bell. DING! DING! DING! Ace drives an elbow into Johnny’s back, then quickly climbs up the buckles and wraps Dangerous in a waistlock. Andrea scrambles out of the intended path and ducks under the top rope, waiting on the ring apron. With a mighty heave, Lezaire launches the Barracuda off the top buckle and down to the mat with a German suplex. Moments before impact, Andrea leaps onto the top rope and flies towards Ace, crashing down atop him with a phoenix splash. Drea covers the winded Ace and Aaron looks to make the count. ONE! TW...NO! Lezaire manages to kick out to a boo from the stands. “What a start to this match! Lezaire jumped Dangerous before the bell even rang, and hit a super German suplex, but he got his due as Andrea Montgomery flattened him with a phoenix splash!” Comet shouts. “Yeah, but Lezaire kicked out, not only salvaging this match from a dud rating, but making sure some loser didn’t get a fluke victory,” Riley says. “Andrea Montgomery is far from a loser. She’s a former tag team champion and a two-time light heavyweight champion!” Comet says, very defensive. “Yes, but what’s the key word? ‘Former’ as in, in the past, as in past her prime if she ever had one. She’s got no business in the ring at all,” Riley says. “So instead, she should take a place at this booth like you?” Comet inquires. “That hurt and was uncalled for,” is all Riley can muster. Dangerous rises to his feet, a bit shaky after the suplex, and lifts Ace up as well. Johnny snaps out a kick, nailing Lezaire in the chest, and the Barracuda presses the attack, nailing Ace with a palm strike to the forehead. Johnny leaps into the air and sends the Prodigy to the mat with a spin kick. Dangerous makes a cover, but Andrea rolls the spy off before Vandervort can count. Dangerous pops to his feet and lashes out with a front kick, but Andrea deftly scissors the leg, taking herself and JD to the mat. “Nice flurry from Dangerous on Lezaire, and he went for the pin, but must have forgotten about Andrea Montgomery, so she reminded him by breaking it up,” Comet says then takes a deep breath. “I hope those two dolts, Andrea and Johnny wear each other out so Ace can sit back and watch, then swoop in and take the match!” Riley says enthusiastically. “Swoop in like a vulture? Just steal a win after doing nothing the entire match?” Comet questions. “Makes perfect sense to me. Granted, watching those two wrestle won’t be very pretty, but it’s easier than having to confront them,” Riley says. Andrea twists on Johnny’s ankle as she clamps down on the leg scissor, prompting Vandervort to check on the Barracuda’s condition. Dangerous waves off Aaron and kicks at Andrea’s legs, trying to free himself. Johnny doesn’t have to worry about escaping the hold on his own, however, as Ace, after motioning Steve closer for a better angle, drops an elbow across Drea’s torso. “Way to go Ace!” Riley cheers. “See that, Comet? He’s in the match! He broke up that submission, preventing a chance for him to lose, because Dangerous probably would have tapped after a few more seconds.” “I highly doubt that, Bobby. Johnny Dangerous has great conditioning and it’s far too early in the match for a submission, especially without any prior work to that limb,” Comet notes. “Aha! You said ‘highly’! You’ve been toking, and I’m going to report you, and you are so outta here!” Riley exclaims gleefully. Lezaire pulls Andrea to her feet and after a quick forearm to the jaw to daze her, locks on a rear waistlock. Ace lifts her up and plants Drea with an atomic drop, a few inches away from Dangerous. The Prodigy takes a few paces backwards and leaps, nailing Andrea with a flying clothesline, who in turn, slams into Dangerous. “Domino effect! Lezaire knocked down Andrea who took Johnny to the mat,” Comet states. “That Ace, he’s so clever! He inflicted damage upon Johnny Dangerous without even touching him!” Riley says. Lezaire pulls himself up and quickly rolls Andrea off of Johnny lest referee Aaron count a pin. The Prodigy pulls Drea up, grabs her right arm, wraps it around her neck, and drops to the mat. Ace turns his attention towards Johnny now, and pulls the Barracuda to his feet. Lezaire attempts an Irish whip, but Dangerous reverses it, sending Ace crashing into the turnbuckles. Johnny charges in after him, but Lezaire grabs the top ropes and lifts himself up, placing his legs on JD’s shoulders. The Prodigy tries to launch Dangerous to the mat, but the Barracuda grabs his arms and falls backwards, planting Ace face-first into the mat. “Nice spinning arm neckbreaker from Ace to take Andrea down for a bit, but Johnny Dangerous reversed the Irish whip and dropped Lezaire on his face,” Comet notes. “NO! Not his face! Damn you, Johnny Dangerous!” Riley squeals. Johnny extracts himself from the tangle of limbs and gets to his feet. Dangerous hops to the top turnbuckle, sizes Ace up, and leaps off, dropping an elbow in the middle of his back. The Barracuda hauls Lezaire to a vertical base, wraps him up in a waistlock and pivots, executing a belly to belly suplex. Johnny stays down for the pin. ONE! Andrea rises to her feet and notices Dangerous covering Lezaire. TWO! Andrea scrambles towards the Barracuda and the Prodigy. THREE! NO! Andrea arrives just in time with a drop kick to Johnny’s head. “Montgomery breaks up the pin with not a moment to spare!” Comet shouts. “This might be the only time I say this, but thank you, Andrea! Lezaire still lives!” Riley exclaims happily. Andrea pulls Johnny to his feet and whips him to the ropes. As he comes off the rebound, Johnny eats a spin kick to the jaw, but it only staggers the spy. Dangerous shakes his head in an attempt to shoo the circling birds, and heads for Andrea once more. The end result is the same, though Andrea accomplishes it this time with an elbow, and once again, the Barracuda stumbles backwards. This time it’s Andrea’s turn to make the first move as she charges Dangerous and drives a knee into his gut. Drea slips on a front facelock and drops to the mat with a DDT. Drea gets back to her feet but is blindsided by a forearm from Ace Lezaire. Montgomery stumbles forward and Ace darts in, slapping on a chickenwing facelock. He simply falls backwards, taking Drea to the mat and he locks on a leg scissors, trapping her even further. “Yes! Ace Lezaire’s got Andrea Montgomery trapped in that chickenwing facelock, and there’s no hope! Dangerous is still on the mat, showing no signs of getting up, and I know Andrea’s too weak to withstand that submission for much longer,” Riley says hopefully. “I beg to differ, Bobby. Dangerous is in fact stirring on the canvas. However, I will agree that Andrea Montgomery is not strong enough to power out of the hold without some assistance,” Comet notes. Andrea thrashes her legs on the mat, trying to escape the hold as Vandervort asks if she’ll submit. With her free arm, she waives the ref away while planting her feet on the mat and pushing. Andrea and Ace’s lower bodies rise off the mat, but in the process, Lezaire’s shoulders touch the mat, prompting Aaron to count the pin. ONE! TWO! TH...NO! The Prodigy finally realizes what’s going on and rolls onto his side, breaking the pin. “Lezaire came very close to getting pinned there! He just managed to roll out of it, but Andrea Montgomery is still trapped in that chickenwing facelock,” Comet points out. “No chance, Comet. Lezaire was just letting Andrea expend her energy so it’ll be easier to beat her,” Riley states confidently. Vandervort once again checks on Andrea’s status as Johnny Dangerous climbs to his feet and unsteadily makes his way towards the Prodigy and Drea. JD clears his head with a few shakes and kicks Ace in the back of the head. Hoping that she’ll submit very soon, Lezaire keeps the hold locked in despite another kick to the back of his head. “Come on, Ace! Dangerous can’t kick that hard! Just keep that chickenwing facelock on for a few more seconds and sweet, sweet victory will be yours!” Riley cheers. “I highly doubt that, Robert. The Barracuda is proficient in the martial arts, and those kicks look to be taking their toll on Lezaire. It shouldn’t be much longer until he lets go or gets knocked out,” Comet states. Dangerous lashes out with yet another kick to the back of the Prodigy’s skull, but like a pitbull, Ace won’t let go. Johnny decides to go another route and kneels down, locking in a crossface on Lezaire. “Interrogator! Johnny Dangerous has Ace Lezaire in the Interrogator while Lezaire has Andrea Montgomery locked up in a chickenwing facelock! Lezaire might be forced to let go so he can make an escape of his own,” Comet notes. “No way! Andrea Montgomery’s been in that chickenwing facelock for too long! She’ll tap first!” Riley shouts hopefully. “Perhaps, Bobby, but you have to admit that the Interrogator is more potent than the chickenwing facelock. It’s more taxing on the target area, which in this case, is the head and neck,” Comet points out. “I’d agree were it anyone else but Johnny Dangerous applying it. He’s a boob! Dangerous lacks far too much technical knowledge to know how to apply the right pressure with that move, but Ace Lezaire is a technical wizard!” Riley exclaims. Lezaire slowly releases Andrea’s face and claws at Johnny’s hands while keeping the chickenwing in tact. Ace finally gives in and lets go of Drea completely, choosing to work on freeing himself. Taking a page from Andrea’s book, Ace shifts onto his back, plants his feet, and pushes, getting Johnny Dangerous in a pinning situation. ONE! TWO! T...NO! The Barracuda rolls onto his side, effectively stopping the pin. “Uh, didn’t we just do this?” Comet asks, befuddled. “Yeah, only Ace will free himself momentarily,” Riley says. Lezaire grabs Johnny’s hands and tries to pull them apart, but Dangerous has them interlocked too tightly. Andrea slowly gets to her feet as Vandervort checks on Ace. Taking a running start, Drea slams into Johnny’s head with a drop kick. Though rattled, he keeps the crossface clamped on as Drea makes her way back up. She quickly fires off two kicks, both hitting Johnny directly on the wrist, causing him to let go of Ace. “Way to go, Ace! Let that stupid cow do the dirty work for you!” Riley cheers. “I thought you said he’d escape himself,” Comet says. “Yeah, so?” Riley shoots back. “Obviously Andrea Montgomery was the cause behind Johnny Dangerous letting Ace Lezaire out of the Interrogator,” Comet points out. “To the untrained eye, Comet. Ace sent powerful brainwaves into Andrea’s head, telling her what to do. Otherwise, she would have taken off for the mall,” Riley says smugly. “You have now reached a new level of idiocy, Bobby,” Comet states. Lezaire rolls away from Dangerous and Drea, stopping only when he reaches the edge of the ring while Johnny slowly gets to his feet. Andrea takes several steps backwards, giving JD his space. He rubs his wrist for a moment, trying to get some feeling back into it before darting forward. Drea reacts quickly, planting a foot in his chest, sending the Barracuda backwards. Andrea darts in and grabs hold of Johnny’s left arm. A quick arm wringer doubles the spy over, and Andrea slams an elbow into the back of his neck while simultaneously kicking Johnny’s legs out from under him. “Magnolia Bloom from Montgomery! And she’s in good position to hit that springboard four hundred fifty degree splash. With Lezaire still on the mat taking a breather, Andrea Montgomery could steal this match if she’s quick!” Comet exclaims. “No! ACE! Get up! The wench is trying to win!” Riley shouts. Andrea gets to her feet and leans against the ropes for support, catching her breath. She makes her way towards Johnny, pulls him up, and slips on a side headlock. Andrea charges up the turnbuckles and leaps over the top rope, dropping Dangerous throat-first. Drea manages to get a hand on the top strand and keep from hitting the floor. She pulls herself back onto the apron, turns around and hops on the top rope. Drea flies at Johnny, scissors his head, and takes him to the mat. “Bulldog hangman followed up with a head scissor takedown, and Johnny Dangerous is in perfect position for that springboard splash of Andrea’s!” Comet shouts. “Yeah, but Ace Lezaire is going to swoop in and batter her after she hits it. He’s just biding his time, Comet,” Riley says. Andrea climbs to her feet and ducks under the top rope, intent on fulfilling Comet’s prediction. She takes a quick glance at Ace Lezaire, who’s still on the mat, grabs the top rope with both hands and springs up. Drea coils her legs and jumps, flipping four hundred, fifty degrees and landing directly on top of Johnny Dangerous. “Four fifty springboard splash from Andrea Montgomery! If Ace Lezaire doesn’t move quick, Andrea will have this match in the bag!” Comet shouts. “Okay, Ace, enough resting, time to move! Go you stupid Canuck!” Riley roars. Andrea stays down for the pin and takes out some insurance by hooking Johnny’s leg. ONE! Ace hears Vandervort’s hand slap the mat and sits upright. TWO! Lezaire pushes himself off the canvas and takes off towards Andrea and Johnny. THREE! No! The Prodigy arrives just in time, slamming into Andrea, knocking her off of Dangerous. Yes! Lezaire, you genius!” Riley exclaims. “Now just take care of Montgomery and the match is yours.” “I wouldn’t call Ace Lezaire a genius for what he did, perhaps a thieving cheat, but that’s not what’s important. What is important is that Ace Lezaire broke up that pin, and this match is still on,” Comet states. Lezaire gets to his feet moments prior to Andrea and he slams a punch into the side of her head. Ace closes in and unleashes a Euro...Canadian uppercut that rocks Drea. Lezaire hits a boot to her stomach, doubling Andrea over, and the crowd gasps, fearing the Ace Crusher is on its way. “He’s going to do it! It’s Ace Crusher time!!” Riley shouts hopefully. The Prodigy instead slaps on a front facelock and lifts Montgomery up for a vertical suplex. However, Ace releases her at the apex, and Drea slips down behind him. Lezaire simply drops down, snapping Andrea’s neck with a hangman’s noose neckbreaker. “Uh, inverted Ace Crusher!” Riley calls out. “Nay, Bobby, though that hangman’s noose neckbreaker has a similar effect of the Ace Crusher in that it focuses on the neck of the victim,” Comet points out. “And that’s exactly what Andrea Montgomery and Johnny Dangerous are going to become at the end of this match, victims,” Riley says. Lezaire gets to his feet and hauls Dangerous up before nailing an open hand slap across Johnny’s cheek. Ace creates some space between himself and the Barracuda, then closes in, blasting Johnny with a jumping heel kick. Dangerous stays on his feet, so Lezaire remedies that with a clothesline. Lezaire pulls Johnny back up and tells the naive Aaron Vandervort to check on Andrea Montgomery. As the referee is making sure Drea’s okay, Ace takes advantage of the distraction by driving a knee into Johnny’s crotch. The Prodigy follows up with a standing head scissors, and grabbing Dangerous by the quadriceps, he falls backwards with a very lazy piledriver. “Genius, Comet, pure genius! Lezaire, in a rare display of compassion asks the referee to check on the downed Andrea Montgomery, and then he blasted Dangerous with a double cradle piledriver!” Riley exclaims joyously. “Oh, come on, Robert! Lezaire used that distraction to low blow Dangerous!” Comet shouts indignantly. “You say tomato, I say Ace Lezaire is a technical genius,” Riley says. The Prodigy gets to his feet as Vandervort assures him that Andrea is okay, but Ace can see for himself as she’s on her feet as well and making her way towards him. In a fit of desperation, Lezaire pulls Aaron towards him, appearing to have conference with the ref, but in reality using Vandervort as a shield. Andrea tries to go around him, but Lezaire wheels around, keeping a firm grip on Aaron’s shoulders. Andrea takes a moment to look out at the crowd as if pleading for some assistance, and Lezaire reacts quickly, shoving Vandervort into Drea. As she stumbles backwards, the Prodigy darts forward and sends her to the mat with a single leg takedown. He flips her over and drives his shoulder into the back of her neck. “Once again, Ace Lezaire proves why he’s regarded as a technical genius by many well-respected wrestling authorities!” Riley says happily. “You don’t count since nobody respects you, so that leaves the list pretty slim, Bobby,” Comet says. “Besides, nothing about what he did was very technical, aside from that takedown. But even that was set up with a cheap tactic. Using a referee as a shield! Despicable, deplorable, down right dirty!” Comet shouts, eliciting a pop from fans of alliteration. Lezaire adds a stomp to Drea’s shoulder blades for good measure before taking off for the corner. He hops onto the second buckle, then the top and leaps off. Ace has great hangtime, but that’s his downfall as Andrea manages to scoot out of the way seconds before he crashes to the mat. “And Lezaire eats canvas on that triple jump moonsault attempt! This could turn the tide back to Andrea Montgomery’s favor, or perhaps give Johnny Dangerous time to recover and mount a come back!” Comet shouts. “No! Damn you, Lezaire! You should have ended it with an Ace Crusher!” Riley laments. “If Ace is the technical genius you purport him to be, it should be a simple task for him to recover and win the match,” Comet says. “Well, he is, and he can. It’s just that those other two losers in the ring have been known to eke out a fluke victory now and again, and with this mishap, no, minor setback, really, it gives them a chance to get one of those fluke wins,” Riley explains. Drea rolls onto her stomach and pushes up to all fours, trying to regain her composure. She doesn’t get much time, though, as Johnny Dangerous runs right at her and kicks Andrea in the head, knocking her back down. Johnny lifts Lezaire up and sends him into the ropes with an Irish whip. As he comes off the rebound, Ace eats a drop kick from the Barracuda and falls to the mat in a heap. Dangerous presses the assault, lifting Ace back up, snaring the Prodigy in a front facelock, and hauling him up and back down with a vertical suplex. JD rolls onto his stomach with Lezaire still entwined and gets back to his feet. He tries for another suplex, but Ace blocks it. Dangerous makes another attempt, but once again Lezaire staves it off. JD quickly turns around, getting Ace on his shoulders in a fireman’s carry. He repositions Lezaire slightly, but before he can flip forward, Ace takes advantage of the repositioning and slips down. He grabs Johnny’s head on the way down and delivers a shoulder jawbreaker. “Lezaire wriggled out of that attempted Spinal Explosion and hit a jawbreaker, and the former World champ is dazed,” Comet states. “And Ace Lezaire is moments away from winning this match!” Riley shouts enthusiastically. Ace wraps Johnny in a 3/4 facelock, orders Steve to get on the apron directly in front of him for the perfect shot, and...is shoved forward by Dangerous, right into Steve! Cameraman and wrestler collide, with Steve getting knocked off the apron, but Ace getting a face full of camera in the process. “No! Steve you dolt! Dangerous should be disqualified! He deliberately pushed Ace Lezaire into that camera, which in this contest would be considered a foreign object!” Riley cries. “I think it was unintentional. And besides, Lezaire has no right to have Steve on the apron in the middle of the match,” Comet notes. “Ace Lezaire can do whatever he wants, because he’s Ace Lezaire!” Riley whines. Dangerous clears his head with a quick shake and rushes towards the dazed Ace Lezaire and grabs his right arm. He quickly puts Ace’s arm over his shoulder, firmly planting his neck in the Prodigy’s armpit to an enormous pop from the crowd. Johnny hoists him up and drops Lezaire with the MI Slam. “MI Slam! Dangerous nailed Ace Lezaire with the MI Slam, and if Andrea Montgomery doesn’t do something quickly, Johnny will win this match!” Comet exclaims. “No! It can’t be. It just can’t be. Say it ain’t so, Ace, say it ain’t so,” Riley pleads. Dangerous turns over and hooks Ace’s leg and Vandervort slides in to count the pin. ONE! Andrea picks herself up off the mat. TWO! She wheels around and runs towards Johnny and Ace. THREE! No! Andrea barely managed to shove the Barracuda off and the match will continue. “Yes! Thank you, Andrea Montgomery for saving Ace Lezaire. Not that he needed it,” Riley adds. “Sure. You were on the verge of tears because you thought Johnny Dangerous was going to pin Ace,” Comet points out. Andrea rises to her feet seconds before Johnny and fires off a kick, catching him under the chin. She drives a knee into his jaw, follows up with a forearm, and sends Johnny crashing into the corner. Drea takes a few steps backwards before rushing towards the Barracuda and going into a forward roll. As she reaches Johnny, Andrea springs up, grabs his head and drops to the mat, jarring his senses with a jawbreaker. “Tuckerman and Roll from Andrea Montgomery! That is usually the prelude to Done and Dusted, so she might pick up the win here,” Comet states. “Not a chance! Ace Lezaire is going to spring up and wipe the mat with her and Dangerous,” Riley says, though without much confidence. Andrea pops back up to her feet, slips behind Johnny and hops onto the top turnbuckle. Drea reaches forward and grabs his arms. She jumps off the buckle and plants her feet in the back of his head, driving Johnny into the mat face-first. “Oh my goodness!” Comet shouts. “Who do you think you are, Keith Murray?” Riley questions. “Once again, I’m at a loss as to who you’re talking about,” Comet states. “He’s a rap artist and had a song title ‘Oh My Goodness’. Wouldn’t hurt to dabble in other musical genres, Comet,” Riley says. “Well, regardless of that, Andrea Montgomery just slammed Johnny Dangerous into the mat with that cattle branding-type maneuver. Cattle branding and double stomp combination, and it looked painful,” Comet says. Drea gets to her feet and ducks under the top rope. She grabs the cable and springs on top. Andrea bounces once, twice, three times and leaps, twisting and cavorting in the air, slamming down on Dangerous back-first. “Falling Star Bomb! Andrea Montgomery should have this match taken care of after that!” Comet exclaims. “Not likely! Ace Lezaire is going to get up momentarily,” Riley says, a twinge of desperation in his voice. Andrea rolls Johnny onto his back, makes a lateral press and hooks the leg as Vandervort slides in to count. ONE! Startled by the hand slapping the mat, Lezaire sits up. TWO! Lezaire climbs groggily to his feet and stumbles towards Andrea and Johnny. THREE! Vandervort leaps to his feet to call for the bell as Lezaire nails Andrea in the back of the head with a double ax-handle. DING! DING! DING! “And the winner of this match via pinfall, ANDREA MONTGOMERY!” Funyon booms over the roaring crowd and No Doubt’s “Just a Girl”. “What an impressive match! All of the competitors in this ring fought hard, but Andrea Montgomery pulled out with a win,” Comet states. “You’re just saying it’s impressive because Andrea used your old finisher,” Riley says bitterly. Lezaire gets to his feet and slides under the bottom rope, heading for his personal cameraman, Steve. Berating him the entire time, Ace heads back up the ramp as Storm goes to a commercial for Mountain Dew Blazin’ Silver, with actual chunks of sperm whale fat!

The camera fades up from darkness in what is obviously a traveling gym. On the bench press machine, “Grand Slam” Mark Stevens is seen working out. He is lifting a light load, but it is obvious from the redness in his face and arms, he has been lifting for a while. The mic on the camera picks up a door opening, then a melodic female voice fills the room. “Mark, what the hell are you doing?” Grand Slam pushes one more press out of his aching arms, then drops the bar to its resting place and looks over to his right. “I’m working out. Trying to get rid of some of this flab.” “You know that’s not what I meant. Why are you here?” He smiles. “I’m here because it is in my contract that, even if I am unbooked at a show, since I am on the active roster, I have to travel.” “Dammit… you know that’s not what I meant.” “I know. I know. Sit down.” The woman finally comes into the room and into view of the camera. The crowd in the arena pops as they recognize the one-time Carnie Mistress Sarah. She walks over and sits on the leg press machine next to Grand Slam and tosses him a towel which he drapes around his neck. “Mark, what are still doing here? If Z gave you any match you want, why didn’t you use it to get out of here and be with your family? You should have had him book you against Ced again, or maybe Landon… somebody who likes you and gone home. That’s what you want, isn’t it?” “Yes,” he says, shaking his head, “and no. When all of this started that’s what I wanted. All I could think about while Duran was beating my brains out was that I was one match closer to going home. I’m retired Sarah. But now… now there is something I need to do.” Sarah rolls her eyes. “You men and your damn pride. It’s not worth it Mark. It’s not worth getting killed in that Hell in a Cell match.” “It is Sarah. This is important.” “Why Mark? Why is it so important?” He stands up suddenly and throws the towel across the room. “BECAUSE IT’S MY FAULT!” “What are you talking about?” He paces around the room. “All of this. Everything. Every slimy thing King has done. All of the hell he has put people through here… every damn bit of it is my fault, and he knows it!” Sarah stands up and looks at Grand Slam as he leans against the wall. His face is suddenly far older than normal, and the scars from the numerous matches he has bled in stand out bright pink against his pale skin. “Mark… how is it your fault?” “You know I trained him Sarah. He was my best friend for years and we talked about everything. He introduced me to Lynn. We were like brothers. But then he changed and I should have seen it coming. When he turned, when he decided to join Wilson’s group, he didn’t attack Edwin or Chris, he attacked me. I guess what I’m saying is… maybe I deserved it.” “Mark… you were his friend. It wasn’t anything you did, that’s just who he really is.” “No. He was a good man. He stood beside me the day I was married. We were partners for a long time down in the indies. I called Jayson and got King his tryout match. Something happened to him, something changed him.” He pushes away from the wall and begins to pace again, gesturing with his hands to emphasize every word. “Maybe King was right all those years ago.” Sarah looks at her old friend with sadness in her eyes. “I remember what he said about you. I don’t believe a word of it. And you shouldn’t now.” “Why not? He said I was selfish, that I never gave him a shot at any of the titles I won. Well, he’s right. I never asked anyone to give him a shot. I sat there in front of him wearing belt after belt and never once asked if he wanted a shot at any of them.” “Mark, he should have earned the shots! You know that as well as I do.” “No. He earned them. He kept the Carnival together through all of Wilson’s little games. I was selfish. But it isn’t just that. Sarah, I trained him, taught him everything I knew. Somewhere along the way, I must have done something, must have said something, that caused all of this. It’s my fault that he’s not the King of Hearts anymore.” “Mark, that was his choice, he is an adult. He took all of that trust, all of that love that you gave him and he flushed it down the toilet. Dammit Mark, he played you for all you were worth and when the time was right, he flushed you down the toilet.” “You didn’t know him then Sarah. I did. He changed.” “Fine, fine… he was Saint f*cking Brian until he attacked you. So now you think that by fighting him in this match you are going to make all of that better?” “No. I can’t change the past, but maybe, just maybe, he’ll see the lengths I am willing to go to oppose him and he’ll… I don’t know… turn over a new leaf.” “You know that isn’t going to happen. King is King, and he’ll never be any different.” “I know. But somebody has to try. At the very least, someone needs to step up and knock him down a few pegs.” “And it has to be you…” “Yeah. It does. I owe him that much.” “You owe him?” “I do. One way or the other, he’s still the best fried I ever had, and I can’t let that go without a fight. So whether or not it makes any difference to anyone else, including King, I have to go into that Cell, and I have to try. I’ve lost friends over this business before. Raynor… Thugg… you… I have to put a stop to it. One way or the other, at the end of Ashes 2 Ashes, I’ll know. That’s why it is important, and that’s why I have to do it.” “And you never leave a friend or break a promise. Mark Stevens, you are a dying breed.” He smiles again, and the weight of all that has been said seems temporarily lifted from his shoulders. “Don’t say that…” Both of them laugh as the camera fades… “Grand Slam” Mark Stevens v. The Suicide King Hell in the Cell Ashes 2 Ashes 2004 November 7

As Storm comes back from commercial, the camera pans the sold out crowd in the Rose Garden. The packed house does the usual “cheer because the cameras are on” stuff as Comet begins to speak. “Welcome back, true believers in the SWF. It is I, Cyclone Comet, and with me as always is the impeccably devious Bobby Riley!” “Hey, you actually said something that only a total comic book geek would get,” replies Riley. “I’m shocked and surprised… Even if I -am- devious, and manipulative too.” “True,” notes Comet. “However, up next we have two hearty defenders of justice in the form of new Hardcore champion Christian Fury and ’The Fallen Angel’ David Cross taking on the dastardly team of Revolution Zero.” “I think I’ll take the team who’s said more than two words to each other. Even though Cross and Fury have enough combined angst to make your normal Goth club look like shiny, happy people.” Funyon steps in the ring to the cheers of the capacity crowd. “The following match is scheduled for one fall, and is for the SWF WORLD TAG TEAM TITLES!” Title match pop as the lights darken and the crowd buzzes. “First, the challengers…” The crowd rises and a few lighters are seen as the creepy beginning to ‘Back on Earth’ starts. A series of highlights from The Fallen Angel’s short career in the SWF start up. A spotlight shines on the entranceway as Ozzy’s voice kicks in and out walk both Cross and Fury, title belts on their persons. The crowd roars its approval as white bursts of mini-pyro go off behind them. “…at a combined weight of 502 pounds, they are respectively, the SWF Hardcore Gamers and USJL Champion, CHRISTIAN FURRRRRRY and “THE FAAAALLEN ANGEL” DAAAAAAVID CROSS!” Both Fury and Cross head to the ring, ignoring the cheering crowd as they do. Cross, kissing his heirloom cross before handing it over, gives his valuables to the ring attendant. Meanwhile, Fury springboards into the ring. After a moment, he slides the kendo stick out of the ring, along with his jacket and sunglasses. Surveying the crowd with an icy, blue-eyed gaze, he then levels the same gaze at his partner. Cross returns the look and Fury nods. “Citizens Cross and Fury may not be best friends, but they seem to have an understanding,” says Comet. “Too bad they’re about to face a well-oiled machine, ready to tear them apart,” replies Riley. “I highly doubt that either Citizen Cross or Fury can be ‘torn apart’ as you’ve said.” “Everybody has a weakness, Comet.” “Their opponents…” Every light in the arena goes full power as the Smarktron whites out. The only sound heard is that of a needle scratching over vinyl... Then a deep voice booms out over the PA system: 'WEL-WEL-W-W-WELCOME TO THE REVOLUTION!' The crashing guitars of 'Battle Ready' by Otep come in… ‘Lightning’ apparently strikes down from the heavens, hitting the stage and causing gold and red pyro blasts to erupt. The Smarktron shows half-second clips of its members' matches as both Spike and Sean come down to the ring, flanked by Marcus Washington. Spike is his usual cocky self, and Sean simply looks at the two opponents in the ring. “…at a combined weight of 495 pounds, they are two-time and the reigning SWF World Tag Team Champions…SEAN DAVIS…HOLLYWOOD’ SPIKE JENKINS… REVOLUUUUUUTION ZERO!” Both Davis and Jenkins get in the ring to the overwhelming boos of the crowd as Jenkins displays his belt to the crowd. Davis simply hands his over to the referee and, after a few choice words, Spike hands his belt over too. “Revolution Zero looking confident tonight,” says Comet. “I dare say they’re underestimating Cross and Fury tonight.” “I don’t think Cross and Fury are exactly at the level of Revolution Zero, or… Hell… Even Wild and Dangerous.” “We shall see tonight if they can join the illustrious list of SWF tag champions.” “They have the same chance as Van Sucklin does later on tonight.” DING! DING! DING! Cross and Fury confer, then the Hardcore champ enters the ring to face off against ‘Hollywood’, who has entered the ring himself. Both men circle each other for a moment, before locking up to no avail as Fury simply pushes Jenkins into the ropes. The ref counts the break, and Christian breaks cleanly and backs off as Spike shrugs it off, going right back after Fury. Jenkins throws a quick palm thrust, but Fury ducks and nails an elbow to the back of Spike’s head. He takes him down to the mat with a quick drop toehold, then applies a headlock. “Citizen Fury has the early momentum, but neither man has much of an advantage,” says Comet. “Jenkins is still feeling out Fury,” replies Riley. “Give him a few minutes and ass kicking can begin.” “I think Christian is doing the same thing,” says Comet. “After all, he has only been back in the SWF a few weeks, but has been able to win the HGC title over Citizen Davis.” “Lucky win. The psycho managed to get one lousy win and you act like he’s the comeback kid.” Fury stands back up with the headlock, but Jenkins pushes him off and sends him to the ropes. The former SJL mainstay hits a quick dropkick on Fury, following it up with another dropkick to Fury’s face as he attempts to get up! Jenkins, a smirk on his face, moves in on Fury again, hitting him with a quick kick to the chest… Followed by another stiff one… Then finishes it by backing away and drilling Fury right in the face as the crowd boos lustily! “See what I told you Comet?” Riley begins as Spike trash talks the downed Fury. “Give a master tactician like Jenkins a few minutes to work things out and see what happens.” “I somehow doubt that either Citizen Cross or Fury has given up after a simple couple of moves, no matter how impressive they are,” replies Comet. “It would make it a shorter amount of time until Toxxic ends MVS and his pathetic little career.” Jenkins waits for Fury to get back to his feet, then drills him with a quick palm thrust to the jaw! Fury falls back to the corner and Spike follows that up by charging Fury and sending his arm out at an angle, drilling Christian in the face with a Roaring Elbow! “SPIKE SUCKS!” “This crowd here in Portland is not fond of Citizen Jenkins at all,” says Comet as Spike looks down at Fury with a smirk on his face. “I can only imagine how loud it will be when the World Champion walks out here later on this evening.” “These people also supported Don Owen for decades so I think their opinion means about the same, or as much, to actually talented wrestlers like Revolution Zero as logic means to you, Comet.” “Or perhaps, a free lap dance means to you Robert?” “Well, as long as the dancer is packing - err, I mean - uh - damn you, Comet!” Comet quietly chuckles as the booing crowd just grows louder. Cross looks on, still stone-faced while Washington hyperactively pounds on the mat, cheering Spike on. Spike goes to the corner to wait for Fury to rise again. Christian gets to his feet, a little shaken, and turns around to see Jenkins explode from the corner, extending his legs out for a super kick! Only a slight problem derails those plans for Spike… “OOOOOOHHHH!” …as Fury ducks under the super kick attempt and drills a nasty shot to the groin, causing Jenkins to collapse to the mat, holding his “lower abdominal” region! “That was completely and totally wrong,” says Riley in protest as the capacity crowd cheers Fury on. “That should be a disqualification!” “The referee was unable to see where Fury’s blow landed,” replies Comet. “As far as he knows, Fury simply hit Jenkins in the thigh.” “But he didn’t! He could’ve caused irreparable nerve damage to Spike right then.” “Why are you worried about a vile man like Spike Jenkins ability to have children?” Riley is silent as Spike gets back to his feet rather quickly, grimacing. The pain just grows greater as Fury drills Spike with a picture-perfect spinning heel kick, which sends Jenkins back on his ass! Back on his side of the ring, Fury heads over to the corner and to the cheers of the crowd, tags in Cross! Jenkins gets back to his feet and charges Cross as he gets in the ring, only to have the Oil City native duck under his palm thrust attempt, and send Spike sprawling to the mat with a surprise forearm! “Citizen Cross looks like he’s ready and willing to take Citizen Jenkins to the woodshed,” says Comet as Spike uses the ropes to get back up. “The problem for Cross is that he’s a big goof and that Spike, or even Washington for that matter, will outsmart him because…he’s Cross.” “I think that fact you believe Jenkins can outsmart anyone is proof enough you have serious issues,” says Comet. “I may have serious issues, but at least I don’t believe I am a superhero.” “Whatever are you talking about?” A clueless Comet looks on to see Cross drilling Spike again with a kick to the gut. The USJL champ locks Jenkins in a front chancery, grabs the far leg, and takes him down to the mat with a punishing FISHERMAN’S SUPLEX! Cross doesn’t bother holding for the pin. Instead, he pulls Spike off the ground and, to the cheers of the capacity crowd, grabs him with a front waistlock... He tosses him up, over, and to the mat with a… “…RELEASE BELLY TO BELLY BY CITIZEN CROSS!” screams Comet as Jenkins rolls around in pain and Cross gets back up to his feet and raises his fist. “Just a small setback Comet,” replies Riley. “Spike just has to tag The Perfect Storm in, and everything will be fine.” “I think Citizen Jenkins will have a problem doing that, considering the USJL champion just tossed him around like a rag doll.” “Beating up Fury was hard work,” replies Riley. Cross again pulls Spike up easily. The former Cruiserweight champion grabs Cross for support, only to be drilled with a kick to the gut! As Jenkins is doubled over, Cross pauses, then drives his right knee into Spike’s temple, sending him back to a standing position. However, it's only for a moment as The Fallen Angel sends his left leg whipping over into Jenkins' skull to the cheers of the crowd with a CRESCENT KICK! “Citizen Jenkins is reeling,” Comet says as Cross again raises his fist to the crowd, moving toward Spike. “If he does not tag out soon, the reign of Revolution Zero will soon be over.” “This is all a part of the plan,” replies Riley. “Let the goof think he has control, then boom, take the rug out from under him!” “So, getting his behind kicked for the last few minutes was just apart of the larger plan?” “Exactly, can’t you see that Comet? Jenkins suckers Cross in, and Davis takes care of the cornball.” “That was a twisted enough explanation even politicians cringed, Bobb-o.” “It’s still true,” replies a petulant Riley. “As I said, Citizen Jenkins should put his plan into action soon, or he’ll be defeated.” Cross waits as Jenkins get to his knees, only to drill one-half of the tag champions with a quick forearm to the face! Cross takes Jenkins back down to the mat with a quick and brutal DDT. Again, Spike is pulled to his feet by Cross and absolutely nailed with a kick to the gut. Jenkins goes slack as The Fallen Angel locks him in a front chancery, causing David’s first attempt lifting Spike to fail. Then, as Cross attempts to pull Jenkins up again… “…LOW BLOW BY SPIKE!” yells Comet as Cross slumps to the mat and Jenkins goes to his knees. “See what I told you Comet?” asks Riley while the crowd boos Spike. “That was the maneuver of a desperate, desperate man Robert,” replies Comet. “Can’t win a match without cracking a few nuts,” notes Riley. “Now, it’s time for Revolution Zero to show why they are the champions.” “If in fact Citizen Davis can take advantage of that dastardly move by ‘Hollywood’,” replies Comet. “Citizen Cross and Fury are both fighters.” “They are also both primarily singles wrestlers,” notes Riley. “Revolution Zero will take advantage of that fact and take them apart.” Fury extends his hand for a tag as Cross tries to get to his feet. Washington screams encouragement at Spike as he crawls to his corner. The Fallen Angel gets back to his feet, but it’s to a round of boos as the former Hardcore champion enters the ring and heads for Cross! “Beatdown time!” says a gleeful Riley. “Cross isn’t down and out yet,” replies Comet. “He is a true warrior with a hero’s heart.” “Too bad he’s still a loser.” “Losers don’t normally have championships, Robert.” “He’s a lucky loser.” David turns around to meet Sean head on, but The Perfect Storm dives and takes Cross down to the mat with a football tackle! The Portland crowd heaps abuse on both Spike and Davis while Jenkins trash talks to the fans. Davis pulls Cross off the mat and then stuns him with a quick head BUTT! As Cross tries to clear the cobwebs, Davis picks him up on his shoulder, getting The Fallen Angel into a fireman’s carry before dropping him right into an outstretched knee… Stomach first… “…DAVIS WITH A GUTBUSTER!” screams Comet as the crowd really turns on razz. “Forget it, the goof is done!” says a jubilant Riley. “Can’t this match be for the USJL title too? I mean, after all, it’s only fair.” “Every time you count out Citizen Cross he seems to comeback and make you pay for your words Bobb-o.” “The big goofs luck can’t last forever,” replies Riley. “Oh well, maybe after this, he and Fury can watch Angel and brood together or something.” Davis picks up Cross, half by his hair and half normally, then gets an admonishment from the referee that Davis simply ignores. The Perfect Storm lands a quick kick to the gut of Cross again! The Fallen Angel doubles over, and Davis locks in a front chancery. The former Hardcore champion then sends the crowd into silence as he dead lifts Cross up in the air and holds him for a moment, letting all the blood rush into The Fallen Angel’s skull… Before dropping him face-first to the mat with a suplex, other wise known as a… “…FALCON ARROW BY DAVIS!” screams Comet as Davis hooks a leg and the referee drops down to count… …ONE… …TWO… …THR - SHOULDER UP! “Citizen Fury looked like he was about to run in to save his partner, but the USJL champion proved he’s not stopped fighting, kicking out after that dangerous move,” says Comet as Davis plays to the crowd a bit before turning his attention back to Cross. “Just a minor blip,” replies Riley. “Cross is done; he just doesn’t know it yet.” “You sound so sure of that fact.” “Because it’s true,” replies Riley. “Cross is going down, and going down hard,” Riley says as Davis pulls Cross up and backs away for a moment, before throwing a right hand… …Which Cross blocks! A little sloppily and not that clean, but... Cross still blocks it. Davis throws another, only Cross blocks it again as the crowd buzzes. One more time, Davis throws a right hand... This time Cross blocks, then drills The Perfect Storm with a forearm! Davis backs up, and then throws another haymaker, only to have The Fallen Angel block yet again, then land another forearm... Then another one... And another one as the crowd goes mad! Out of nowhere, Cross pulls Davis in close and nails him with a big right-handed SHORT ARM LARIAT! As the crowd continues to cheer and Davis stumbles around, Cross nails him in the gut and sends him crashing down to the mat with a huge GUTWRENCH SUPLEX! Cross races over and tags Fury! The redheaded champ dashes through the ropes, and winds up behind the recovering Davis. Fury catches an arm around Davis’ neck, and cinches it down with pressure from the other! The crowd is going bananas as Davis struggles to find wind. “Citizen Fury back in the ring, and already trying to wear down his opponent even more,” Comet states as Fury continues to tighten his hold. Davis starts going a little more slack with each passing moment. “Sleeper hold?!” Riley exclaims. “A freakin’ SLEEPER HOLD?!?! No respecting Hardcore champ would be putting anyone in a sleeper hold!” “You realize, of course, that Citizen Fury just won the Hardcore Gamers Championship belt from Davis on our last show, and would have him scouted well.” “Yeah, but the inverse could be said.” Meanwhile, back in the ring, Fury seems to have Davis all but out… However, there’s a commotion as Washington is screaming at the top of his lungs, and Jenkins seems about ready to bolt into the ring to his partner’s aid. The ref dashes over, getting in Jenkins’ case, when suddenly… “See what I mean, Comet? Counter-scouting at its finest!” We find that Davis suddenly found his wind… Or never lost it to begin with… And drives a massive elbow into Fury’s gut! As the crowd jeers Davis, and cheers Fury on, the Hardcore champ fights off the blow… But is rewarded with another elbow… And a third finally staggers him enough where the hold is loosened. Davis stands, a little bit winded but probably not as much as Team Newer Guys would like, and sizes up the recovering Fury. Fury, to his credit, tries to re-right himself quickly and continue to press his advantage, but Davis indeed has his opposition scouted well. He lances out a hand, catching Fury in the throat! The crowd lets its venom go, but Davis doesn’t care as he gives a quick lift, and… Down goes Fury to the Chokeslam! “It’s all over for Fury!” Riley shouts. The crowd jeers as Davis slides down and covers… The ref, conveniently, turns at this time, and slides down for the count! ONE!... TWO!... THR… And Fury manages to power the shoulder up. “Citizen Fury not out of this yet!” Comet cries over the crowd. “Just a minor delay of the inevitable,” Riley replies. “You’ve been saying that the whole match, Bobbo.” The crowd cheers madly, and Davis glares at the ref. But he can’t say much, knowing that Jenk and Marcus were ‘just trying to help’. Suddenly he smiles, as he sees the ref distracted by The Fallen Angel, who was trying to come in to save his tag partner. Davis hauls Fury up and slings him into the corner where his teammate lies. Jenk smiles and latches an arm around Fury’s throat! The crowd goes Arctic cold as Jenk yanks back on Fury’s neck, and Davis starts leveling shoulder after shoulder into Fury’s midsection like he was a tackling dummy in Davis’ FSU glory days. “This is an absolute travesty of everything good and right!” Comet shrieks. “Turn around, ref! Turn around!” “Nothing wrong with this,” Riley calmly says. “Just a bit of tag-in teamwork.” “But it’s a blatant choke, and no one’s even tagged anyone, Bobbo!” Shot after shot is leveled, until Jenk lets go of Fury’s neck. “I see no choke,” Riley observes innocently. Cross, to his credit, immediately relented whatever fight he was putting up with the ref when he saw his partner in dire straights. And the ref, whom thinks his message got through finally, has turned around and is coming back towards the corner. “There’s your ref,” Riley continues. Davis continues leveling shoulders in on Fury until the ref hits about four and a half, then stops. Fury is completely free now… And sags to the mat, completely doubled-over and in severe pain. And, to finish out the predictable set of circumstances, Davis tags Jenk in with a grin, and trades spots as Jenk hauls Fury up by the hair, crowd screaming discontent and malice the whole way. “And there’s your tag,” Riley finishes. “Happy now, Captain Spandex?” “The tag was -after- everything happened!” “Eh… Can’t be choosy. But I’d say Fury’s about done, eh?” Indeed, it looks as though Fury’s been put through the ringer as Jenk slings him across the ring. As Fury rebounds back across the ring, Jenk adds a bit of backwards momentum to his trip, and absolutely FLOORS Fury with a nicely timed and placed superkick! The crowd is seething before Fury’s head hits the mat, and Jenk is down there to cover about as fast… ONE!... TWO!... THREE… NO!!! Fury just barely manages to get a shoulder up before the ref’s hand meets the mat for that final time. The crowd ignites, trying to get Fury back in it. “Citizen Fury almost took it on the chin there,” Comet utters, relieved, “But managed to break the pin. Citizen Cross was very hesitant on coming in to assist because of the questionable antics of the referee.” “’Questionable antics’?” Riley retorts as Jenk hauls Fury up once more. “He’s only preventing outside interference by this cheat-loving team!” Jenk dekes around behind Fury, and locks in an inverted facelock! The crowd lets loose a torrent of boos as Jenk smiles faintly. “Spike going for the kill with some Clean Living here!” Riley says with a smile in his voice. But even as he says it, Fury starts launching elbow after elbow into Jenk’s rib cage! Jenk tries to cinch in the facelock more so he can pull off his finisher, but the pain becomes too much when Fury finds the same spot four times in a row… Jenk releases the hold, much to the crowd’s delight, and tries to quickly come up with a more standard plan of attack when Fury moves first when he launches a spinning toe-kick to the side of Jenk’s head! The crowd cheers as Jenk staggers back a couple of steps, and that’s all that Fury needs… Fury bounds back against his side’s ropes, and comes back at the recovering Jenk… Leaps… Hooks an arm under Jenk’s chin and grabs his head… And comes… On… Down… And slams the back of Jenk’s head to the mat! The crowd erupts as Fury slides down and hooks the leg… ONE!... TWO!... THREE… NO!!! Jenk -just- beats out the three count by throwing up the shoulder… Or did he? “Jenkins just escapes Citizen Fury’s grasp!” Comet cries. “Fury got lucky, that’s all,” Riley shouts back over the crowd. The ref is up and physically trying to push Davis back to his corner of the ring. Fury, not really knowing the better and not really caring, drags Jenk up and into his corner, tagging The Fallen Angel in, much to the crowd’s delight! Fury stands Jenk up with a quick double backfist, then ducks out of the way as Cross lances out with a dazzlingly fast sweep kick, planting Jenk face first on the mat! The crowd picks up their love as Cross snaps in a crossface, and puts the pressure on! “Citizen Cross in, and putting the press on Jenkins!” “He never tagged in!” “Yes he did, Bobbo… You saw it.” “I didn’t, and neither did the ref… Look!” And indeed, the ref rushes back over to Cross and Fury’s side of the ring, yelling at the two combatants, and making tagging motions. The ref physically grabs Cross off Jenk, breaking the hold! The crowd rains absolute torrents of abuse on the ref as Cross and Fury try to tell the ref they tagged, but to no avail. The ref is trying to make Fury come back in! “What an uncouth display!” Comet rants. “Citizens Cross and Fury made a legitimate tag, and now it’s being taken back!” “I said I never saw it,” Riley snaps back. “And obviously he never saw it. You’re just delusional.” Meanwhile Jenk, winded and dazed from Cross’ submission hold, is managing towards his corner… Davis is on the tag rope, stretching as far as he can, trying to reach his partner. The crowd is screaming for Fury and Cross to get situated and grab Jenk before he can make the tag. Finally, the two ‘newer blood’ teammates get settled, and then Fury sees Jenk about ¾ of the way to his corner. Fury dives out of the ropes, but it’s too late as Jenk makes a dive for his partner… AND MISSES THE TAG! “By Hera and Damocles he missed the tag!” “No way! He didn’t miss the f’ing tag! The ref’s in Fury and Corss’ pockets!” The ref is right there to say “No Tag!” and the crowd is more than happy to back him up! Davis and Washington are screaming, livid mad as Fury hauls Jenk up, and turns him around. Jenk’s eyes go wide as Fury slings him across to the other ropes… As Jenk bounces, the following Fury doubles him over with a kick to the gut! The crowd cheers hard as Fury turns around, locks Jenk in a ¾ facelock… And kneels quick, driving Jenk’s jaw into his shoulder! But he’s not finished as he stands back up… Facelock still in place! Fury sits out, and plants Jenk’s jaw hard into his shoulder! “Thunder and Lightning! Zeus would be proud of Citizen Fury’s move!” Fury goes to the mat, hooking the leg of the prone and all-but-out Jenkins! ONE!... Davis jumps into the ring, hatred in his eyes, targeting Fury to save his own… TWO!... Cross slips through the ropes, steamrolling at Davis to play prevent defense for his temporary partner… He jumps at Davis, hoping that the little bit of momentum he got will do what he needs… …As he Spears into Davis… …And the ref’s arm swings down… …As Davis and Cross tumble to the mat… Well short of Davis’ intended target! THREE!!!!! DING!!! DING!!! DING!!! The crowd threatens to bring down the house! Funyon, with microphone in hand already, is at ringside… The ref rolls out of the ring to get the belts… “Your winners… And NEW SWF Tag Team Champions… CHRISTIAN FURY… AND DAVIS… CROOOOOSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!” The ref hands Fury and Cross the tag title belt, and they’re held high… Before Fury and Cross roll out of the ring as Jenk and Davis prepared for the retaliatory beatdown. “Fury and Cross proved themselves today, Bobbo!” “Yeah… Proved they’re the luckiest jerks on the planet… Rev-0 will get their revenge!” “We’ll be back with the Montgomery / Dangerous / Lezaire triple threat next!” The camera fades out to Fury and Cross heading backstage with straps on each shoulder, and the Rev-0 trio looking on in anger…

Evan Wolfe vs rKade to be edited in.

Maddix: Megan! Megan...hold up! Rushing through the hallways of the Rose Garden, Landon Maddix is already kitted out in his ring attire...a good while still to go before his ICTV Title rematch is set to get underway. But regardless, he looks ready to go. Right now though, he focus is on Megan Skye who is busy chatting away with a member of the arena staff. Seeing Maddix jogging over, Megan says a hurried goodbye and turns to her man with a smile. Maddix: Where the hell have you been Megs? I've got a lot on my mind and a lot to prepare for, which isn't being helped by you leaving to have a casual chat with everyone and their mothers. You were meant to be getting me coffee...that was twenty four minutes ago Megan. Twenty-four. I've been counting. I can't afford for yo... Megan: Landon...calm down would ya? Maddix: I wouldn't HAVE to calm down if you did what you say you're doing... Megan sighs and holds her right hand out, passing him a nondiscript white cup. Still looking in a flap, Maddix's eyes dart from cup to Megan and back, before he takes a deep breath to try and calm himself down. Maddix: Di... Megan: Don't worry, it's still warm. Oh...and I decided to get you decaf. You look like you need it. Maddix: ...thanks? Megan: (chuckling) You'll thank me when you look in the mirror twenty years from now and don't see any stress lines on your forehead or wrinkles on your face. Believe me. Cuts and bruises will heal, but wrinkles take a lot of time and money to deal with. What are you so worried about anyway? This is what you want. A chance at revenge. The chance of a rematch. The chance at getting your ICTV Title back. Maddix: Yes...but for every chance of glory, there's the chance of me taking a one way trip into a friggin dumpster! The decaf isn't working, as Maddix seems suddenly flustered again. Megan doesn't seem too sympathetic to his concerns though and just laughs. Megan: That's not going to happen, don't worry. Maddix: Yeah...but it COULD! And then you and your collection of woman's magazines are going to have a very busy week trying to get the smell of garbage out of me. Forget all that talk of stress lines and wrinkle lines...I've got something more important than that to worry about. Stress gives you stress lines. What does total and utter embarrassment at being thrown in the trash and smelling of rotten crap give you? I mean...think about this Megan. I've been in Ironman Matches, I've been in Ladder Matches. I fought on stilts. Hell, I've fought in offices and with pies. But I've never been in a position like this. It's a case of me winning, or me looking utterly ridiculous. Not to mention smelling like a tramp. Next thing you know, they'll be putting me in a tag team with that Uncle Filthy guy. The Filthy Twins. That's what they'll call us! And you...you, you'll be Skanky Skye. Is that what you want? Huh? Megan: Landon, would you let me finish? Sighing and taking a moment to calm his breathing down, Maddix motions for Megan to continue. Megan: Remember what happened against Stryke? Maddix: Yeah, I beat him. I gave him the boot and got the win. Your point? Megan: ...we always...have a plan. Finally Maddix's breathing has calmed, the furrow has gone from his brow and slowly but surely...a smile creeps onto his face. Megan: And besides...if you do lose, just think of the fun it'll be cleaning you up. Maddix: ...you don't know how tempted I am to throw this match right now and dive into that dumpster head-first myself. Sharing a smile, Megan and Maddix begin to walk out of shot continuing their conversation out of the camera's sound range...as the feed slowly fades out.

The scene opens with an interior shot of the Rose Garden in Portland, Oregon. A majority of the soon-to-be-capacity crowd are already in their seats but there are still several noticably empty areas. Funyon enters the ring as a steady stream of fans enter the arena. “Good evening, ladies and gentlemen, and welcome to SWF Storm!” A cheer goes up from the crowd. “Tonight’s first contest is scheduled for one fall! Introducing first, hailing from Parts Unknown...standing six feet five inches tall and weighing in at three-hundred and seven pounds...CARNAGE!” The houselights dim, and the rafters shake with the booming bassline of Drowning Pool’s “Bodies”. White fog billows out from the entryway as Carnage stalks out with death in his eyes. Black light beams up from the base of the entryway rigging, casting an eerie glow on the fog and Carnage’s torn white t-shirt. Carnage stalks toward the ring, snarling behind his mask and completely ignoring the mixed, somewhat faint reaction he gets from the crowd. “...and his opponent, from The Magical World of Your Imagination, he stands six feet two inches tall, weighs in at two-hundred and fifty-six pounds, and is accompanied to the ring by Gorilla Pete and Cap’n Plundah...UNCLE FILTHY!” The instrumental Jazz from Hell version of “Let’s Make the Water Turn Black” begins playing over the PA as a single white spotlight hits the entrance ramp. Uncle Filthy’s voice echoes through the arena... “WHADDAYA SAY, KIDS!?” A few people actually do respond this time, shouting back... “UNCLE!” Uncle Filthy strides out into the spotlight, waving to the crowd as Cap’n Plundah and Gorilla Pete dance out on opposite sides of him. All three run to the ring (to moderate cheers from the crowd), with Gorilla Pete and Cap’n Plundah staying at ringside while Uncle Filthy takes his corner. He unbuttons his sweater to reveal a ratty old white Sting t-shirt. The musician Sting. Carnage lunges at Uncle Filthy, catching him by surprise before he can even leave his corner. Comet: Despite being three inches taller and fifty pounds heavier than Uncle Filthy, Carnage is the more agile competitor! He caught Uncle Filthy before he could even take his sweater off! Carnage drills a fist into Uncle Filthy’s midsection, staggering him. He hooks him bethind the legs and hoists him up, draping him over his shoulders. As soon as Carnage has Uncle Filthy across his shoulders, he’s already falling back *WHUMP!* slamming onto the canvas with a Samoan drop! A cheer goes up for Carnage as he rolls over and attempts to cover Uncle Filthy...but Uncle Filthy’s already getting up! Riley: Uncle Filthy can take a surprising amount of punishment – it’s going to take more than one Samoan drop to put him away! Carnage doesn’t even let Uncle Filthy get to his feet, scooping him up to his feet and racking his body with an abdominal stretch! Uncle Filthy fights the hold, jerking his upper body around trying to break Carnage’s grip. Carnage tries to keep Uncle Filthy under control, but can’t hold the submission on him! Instead, he hooks his hands through Uncle Filthy’s legs, looking for the pumphandle...*WHP!* “NOBODY GRABS UNCLE FILTHY’S CRANK!” Uncle Filthy screams, driving a sharp elbow back into Carnage’s chest. This breaks Carnage’s grip, and Uncle Filthy jumps back, turning around to face Carnage. *THMP!* *THMP!* *THMP!* *THMP!* Uncle Filthy fires off a series technically unsound bit high-impact left jabs to Carnage’s face, stomping the mat to make them more powerful. Carnage takes a half-step back, trying to keep his footing. The fans start cheering as Uncle Filthy grabs Carnage’s head and turns him around on his feet, shoving him toward the turnbuckle. Gorilla Pete jumps up and down with joy at ringside as Uncle Filthy braces one hand on the ropes, holds onto the back of Carnage’s head with the other, and yells “COUNTING TIME!” “WUH” The fans don’t even get a chance to count to one! Carnage shoots his hand out and, planting it on the turnbuckle, easily blocks the headsmash attempt! He takes a step back, positioning himself behind Uncle Filthy and *WHMP!* bounces his head off the top turnbuckle! Carnage turns Uncle Filthy around and wraps his hands tightly around his throat. Uncle Filthy frantically kicks his legs and grabs at Carnage’s forearms... *WHUHHMP!!!* ...Carnage turns him around and chokeslams him down! Carnage delivers a massive chokeslam out of the corner, and follows through all the way down to the canvas, dropping to his knees as he plants Uncle Filthy. Uncle Filthy’s body bounces off the mat, but Carnage forces him right back down. Carnage covers Uncle Filthy with a lateral press, hooking both of his legs and pulling his knees in close. Nick Lumas slides in to make the count... Comet: Carnage with a devastating chokeslam...and Carnage has plenty of time to cover him now! ONE! TWO! THRSHOULDER UP! Uncle Filthy thrusts his arm up, barely able to move Carnage enough to lift his shoulder off the mat. A cheer goes up for Uncle Filthy. It may be premature, though, as Carnage already has a hand back around his neck! Comet: Carnage has Uncle Filthy beat already! He may have gotten a shoulder up there, but Carnage has already got him up by the throat again! Carnage wraps one hand around Uncle Filthy’s throat and grabs the back of his neck with the other. He lifts him back to his feet...then back up into the air! *HWHMP!* Carnage chokeslams Uncle Filthy again! The second chokeslam doesn’t have quite as much power behind it, but it’s clearly effective, as Uncle Filthy’s entire body goes limp on contact with the mat. The cheers and boos for Carnage both get louder, as the crowd audibly begins taking sides. And it’s hard not to side with the guy hitting all the chokeslams. Uncle Filthy isn’t even moving as Carnage covers him, this time only hooking his outside leg. Riley: Carnage with another cover attempt... Comet: He knows this match is over. Look at Uncle Filthy – he looks like a burlap sack full of Jell-O! Nick Lumas drops down to the canvas and starts the count. The cheers for Carnage are getting louder, and nobody’s optimistic enough to start an Uncle Filthy chant this time. ONE! TWO! THRE.-SHOULDERUP! Uncle Filthy just barely raises his shoulder off the mat. The crowd is in shock. Carnage looks furious – and shoots Nick Lumas a glare that almost melts him. Carnage composes himself enough to wisely cover Uncle Filthy again, hooking both of his legs and pulling his knees in as close as possible, compacting Uncle Filthy on the mat with all of his weight balanced on his shoulders and upper back. Nick Lumas starts the count... Riley: Smart cover by Carnage... Comet: Carnage stayed focused on his opponent despite the bad call, despite all the distractions, and he has completely controlled this match! He has the speed advantage, but he’s never even had to use it, he just keeps bouncing Uncle Filthy off the canvas, and this time it doesn’t look like he’s getting up! ONE! TWO! Y’ARRRRRRRRRRR*SPLAT*! Out of nowhere Cap’n Plundah sails into the ring, hitting a flying splash on nothing, landing less than two feet away from Carnage and Uncle Filthy. The rush of air, sudden shaking of the mat, and cheer going up from the crowd is enough to get Nick Lumas’ attention, and he looks in Cap’n Plundah’s direction, breaking the count. Realizing what happened, he seems unsure what to do. Comet: What the hell was that!? Riley: Cap’n Plundah with a desperation save from the top rope...but he missed it! Comet: What’s the holdup? Disqualify Uncle Filthy! Carnage lets Uncle Filthy drop to the mat and locks Cap’n Plundah dead-center in his sights. The crowd buzzes during the brief pause, while Lumas consults with someone on his headset. Nick Lumas looks at Cap’n Plundah, who is slowly backing away from Carnage, subtly moving one hand to the hilt of his sword... Nick Lumas signals... that the match will continue! There is a mixed reaction from the crowd, but the cheers seem louder. Riley: Did Cap’n Plundah intentionally miss that splash? He managed to break up the count without getting Uncle Filthy disqualifed! Comet: Do you really think a hobo, a pirate and a man in a monkey suit could plan something like that out? This was just a fluke, and a really generous call by Nick Lumas! Carnage stares at Cap’n Plundah. The Cap’n rethinks pulling his sword and turns to run, but Carnage grabs him by the collar of his pirate shirt. Cap’n Plundah runs in place for a few pointless steps before Carnage pulls him into a single-arm waistlock. Carnage hooks Cap’n Plundah’s leg and lifts him up onto his shoulder, facing him up toward the rafters. Comet: Cap’n Plundah is about to walk the plank! Cap’n Plundah flails his arms, trying to fight out of Carnage’s grip, but it’s pointless. With a sinister grin just visible through the grill of his mask, Carnage bails him ass-first over the ropes with an atomic throw. *WHMP!* There is a flat, wet thump as he falls just short of landing on guardrail, landing flat-backed on the concrete floor with his legs leaned up against the railing. The boos for Carnage are clearly overwhelming the cheers now. The cheers for Carnage are still clearly present, though, getting more isolated but louder. Riley: He killed Cap’n Plundah! Carnage turns his attention back to Uncle Filthy who’s actually starting to move! On the outside, Gorilla Pete circles around the ring to Uncle Filthy, who is slowly making his way to the ropes. Staying on the floor, Gorilla Pete grabs Uncle Filthy by the arms, offering some coach-like “ook”s of support while pulling Uncle Filthy closer to the ropes. Riley: This is why it pays to have a second at ringside...even if he is wearing a monkey suit. Comet: (dripping sarcasm) Suit? What suit? All I see is a magical fun-time gorilla pal...who’s pulling Uncle Filthy to the ropes in plain view of the referee! Uncle Filthy tucks his left hand underneath his sweater, clutching his ribs on the right side, and barely has enough strength to push himself up with the other. He’s able to crawl the few feet to the bottom rope, and he grabs onto it for support. Putting both hands on it, he starts lifting himself up. The cheers for Uncle Filthy are livening up again. There is an audible positive buzz building in the arena. Comet: Uncle Filthy’s only prolonging his suffering by trying to get up! He can’t even hold himself up, let alone fight! The fans are only making it worse for him by cheering him on! On the outside, Cap’n Plundah is very slowly starting to get to his feet, swinging his legs down and using the safety rail to pull himself up. Cap’n Plundah winces in pain each time a supportive fan slaps his back or shoulder. Carnage slowly walks back over to Uncle Filthy, giving him a solid boot to the ribs. He grabs Uncle Filthy’s arms and yanks them off the ropes, then drags him to the center of the ring. Comet: Carnage making sure nothing can go wrong this time! Carnage looks down at Uncle Filthy, then steps over him, applying a double chinlock as he sits down hard on his back. Comet: Carnage has him now! Camel Clutch, right in the center of the ring! A cheer goes up for Carnage as he applies his finishing maneuver, but there are still some scattered (hopelessly optimistic) fans chanting for Uncle Filthy. As he sits down, Carnage carefully maneuvers himself to trap Uncle Filthy’s arms behind his knees, making the hold even harder to escape. He thrashes wildly as Carnage pulls back on the chinlock. Comet: Having Carnage’s weight on his back is doing just as much damage to Uncle Filthy than the chinlock is – Carnage has methodically dismantled his neck and his upper body throughout this match! Uncle Filthy is screaming with pain and exertion as he thrashes his shoulders from side to side. His shouts are muffled as Carnage torques his head even further back, forcing Uncle Filthy’s jaw completely shut. Comet: Uncle Filthy needs to tap out, right now! Even he must be lucid enough to take one look at the situation and realize he’s doomed! Even all the helpful elves he sees dancing around Carnage can’t save him now! Riley: He’s also familiar with the camel clutch from his match with Stryke...I don’t know if he’s completely out of this contest yet... Uncle Filthy has completely lost it. His eyes are bugged out and darting wildly, and he’s gone from thrashing to convulsing. With one last, defiant stab he thrusts his left elbow back...and Carnage can’t hold on! On the side of the arena that saw this brief sign of life, faint “Un-cle Fil-thy” chants are starting up. This is the same side of the arena that can see him reaching into his open sweater... “UNCLE FILTHY FRIENDSHIP PUNCH!!” Uncle Filthy screams the apparent name of the move as he throws a bizarre inward-curving punch with his left hand, one that makes an audible *FWHAP* when it connects with the leather of Carnage’s mask. Surprisingly, Carnage is rocked by the blow, wincing in pain and tensing as if he considered taking a hand off Uncle Filthy’s jaw to clutch his own. The “Un-cle Fil-thy” cheers are getting louder, although the fans that could see Uncle Filthy’s left side now seem a little more divided in their support. Comet: Well, I saw that coming. Uncle Filthy thrusts both his arms back as hard as possible, jamming his chin downward at the same time! He breaks the chinlock! Riley: Carnage couldn’t keep those fingers laced! Uncle Filthy’s free! The audience doesn’t quite roar in approval, but definitely approves. Unfortunately, Uncle Filthy follows through too hard and rams his chin into the mat. This shock stops him briefly, but not cold. Comet: Not yet, he isn’t! Shaking his head, Uncle Filthy adjusts his sweater and briefly clutches his ribs underneath it. Carnage attempts to re-apply the chinlock, but Uncle Filthy tenaciously keeps his chin down. Trying to pry Carnage’s legs out of position with his arms, he throws himself hard to one side! He manages to roll over...and he takes Carnage down with him! Uncle Filthy breaks the camel clutch, but he doesn’t look like he has anything left! Carnage still looks a little stunned, but he’s already on his feet. A clear division is forming in the crowd. Carnage towers over Uncle Filthy. Grabbing him by the neck and shoulder, he picks him up and turns him over into a standing head-scissors. Comet: If he’s going for what I think he is... Uncle Filthy goes limp, slipping through Carnage’s hands and falling face-first on the mat. Carnage grabs him by the waistband of his sweatpants and tries to pull him back up. The sweatpants come up, but Uncle Filthy doesn’t. Fortunately, he’s wearing oversized novelty boxers, emblazoned with surprisingly detailed pot leaves. Unfazed, Carnage tries again to pick him up and... *HWAAAAH!* Even Carnage has to yell out in pain in when Uncle Filthy suddenly pops up, driving the back of his head into Carnage’s groin. A cheer goes up from the crowd, laced with scattered boos. Comet: That’s at least THREE times Carnage should have won this match, and the fans are starting to catch on! Riley: There’s still a surprising number of people cheering for Uncle Filthy, though! Comet: Something it will take the world’s best scientists years to explain. Uncle Filthy catches Carnage square, and he doubles over in pain. Uncle Filthy rolls to the side, and is able to lift himself up to his knees just as Carnage is starting to stand upright. Taking advantage of this, Uncle Filthy lunges and catches Carnage around the neck with a loose side headlock. Carnage tries to power Uncle Filthy up, but, once he’s upright...*WHUMP!*...Uncle Filthy sits down, planting Carnage face-first with a DDT! Comet: I don’t believe it! Uncle Filthy actually hit a DDT...sort of. Riley: He didn’t want to throw himself on his back! He lost some of the move’s effectiveness, but he also spared himself another shock to the upper body! Uncle Filthy tries to hook Carnage’s leg, but doesn’t have the strength to pull his knee in. He makes the cover... ONE! TWSHOULDER UP! Carnage throws Uncle Filthy off with authority! Uncle Filthy scrambles back over, though, and Carnage is still on his hands and knees when Uncle Filthy reaches him! *WHP!* He tags him with a stiff toe kick to the chest. Carnage flinches, *WHP!* almost going down as Uncle Filthy connects with another kick! Riley: He’s Uncling up! Comet: (mocking) “Unclin’! He be Unclin’, Tony!”...I give him fifteen seconds. Carnage is momentarily stunned, long enough for Uncle Filthy to apply another standing side headlock! The “Un-cle Fil-thy” chants are really starting to get going now, as he hooks his far arm underneath Carnage’s hips and tries to lift him up for the Show’s Over, Kids! Comet: He can’t do it! Uncle Filthy can’t pick him up! Uncle Filthy looks like he’s about to pop a couple of ribs as he strains to lift Carnage up...and he does! Not high, not well, and not even all the way off the mat, but he lifts Carnage enough to *THWAMP!* drop him on his face with the Show’s Over, Kids! The crowd actually kind of almost starts going wild, as any specific chants for Uncle Filthy are drowned out by general cheering. Uncle Filthy turns Carnage over on his back and covers him with a lateral press! He doesn’t have the strength to pull his legs in properly, but he covers him square across the upper body. Nick Lumas is already in position... ONE! TWO! TH...IN THE ROPES!! The fans start to cheer, before they notice Nick Lumas signalling “two”. Carnage has a foot on the bottom rope! Comet: Two-count only! Uncle Filthy hit the Show’s Over, Kids, but it only got TWO on Carnage! The cheers for Uncle Filthy start to fade, but swell again as he throws his head back and howls “COUNTING TIME!”. He rolls the still-dazed Carnage over onto his stomach and raises his boot up high... “ONE!” “TWO!” “THREEFOURFIVESIX…” Uncle Filthy wildly stomps at Carnage’s back, head and neck, with the crowd trying to keep pace counting along. “SEVEN!” Uncle Filthy jumps up and delivers a brutal stomp between Carnage’s shoulderblades. Carnage falls to the canvas. Uncle Filthy yells “SEVEN!” again, then straddles the prone Carnage, hooking his arms underneath his shoulders. He wraps his hands around his neck... Riley: We haven’t seen this move from Uncle Filthy yet, but I think I know what it is... ...and sits all the way down on his back! It’s Naptime! Carnage struggles, but he’s already starting to show the effects of oxygen deprivation. Uncle Filthy is sitting high on his lower back, and Carnage is almost able to throw him off-balance by kicking his legs...but Uncle Filthy holds on tight! Comet: So do I! It’s a chokehold! Riley: Carnage is still reeling from that last burst of offense, and now Uncle Filthy’s got him in a compromising position! Comet: Note that big evil Carnage applied a legal chinlock, but beloved Uncle Filthy’s using a choke. Riley: I didn’t hear anything from you when Carnage did the same to Uncle Filthy earlier! Uncle Filthy’s got that underhook choke on Carnage, and it looks like Carnage is slowing down! Carnage’s eyes are closed, and he’s starting to go limp. Nick Lumas comes over to check on Carnage, and Uncle Filthy tries to make the choke look as much like a chinlock as he possibly can. The crowd buzzes as Lumas checks Carnage’s arm. He lifts it...it falls! The crowd, still in a counting mood, shouts “ONE!”. Waiting a second, Nick Lumas lifts Carnage’s arm again... “TWO!” Carnage’s arm falls limply, stopped only by Uncle Filthy’s. Lumas holds Carnage’s hand up for a third and final time... “THREE!” A significant portion of the crowd cheers as Nick Lumas calls for the bell! Uncle Filthy lets Carnage drop to the mat as Lumas raises his arm. Funyon enters the ring, microphone in hand. “Ladies and gentlemen, your winner, UNCLE FILTHY!” Comet: Yeah, big winner. He choked Carnage into unconsciousness. Riley: It’s a legitimate finisher, and a legitimate victory! Uncle Filthy took the worst of Carnage’s offense, and he just kept getting back up! Comet: Yeah, thanks to low blows and pirate interference. Cap’n Plundah and Gorilla Pete enter the ring. Cap’n Plundah is limping and Uncle Filthy is exhausted and barely able to stand, so Gorilla Pete has to dance three times as hard as “Let’s Make The Water Turn Black” plays over the house speakers.

Fallout. Because he never ever lost, pretty much ever. He never promoed, though. One time he did.

When did YOU become a mod, Zack? HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA! Tool.

Get... done? Are you getting a Mexican copy of Word?

I'm #4 of all time? Sweet.

I'm gonna sweeten the pot. Whoever wins Maddix vs Stryke gets a GMail invite.

The Smartmarks wrestling Federation presents... SWF STORM, WEDNESDAY, SEPTEMBER 29TH, LIVE FROM THE COMPAQ CENTER IN SAN JOSE, CALIFORNIA! (5:00pm PCT, 8:00pm EST; check local listings) Send marked matches, promos, etc. to: 5_moves_of_doom Opening Promo: Up for grabs MAIN EVENT#1 SWF CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH Toxxic© vs Andrea Montgomery The gauntlet is thrown, kids! Not one card after Genesis V, Two-time champ Toxxic is defending. Rules: DQ and countout apply. Word Limit: 6000 Send To: Thoth MAIN EVENT #2 ICTV TITLE MATCH Landon Maddix© vs “The Icon” Max King Landon didn’t defend at Genesis, so he’ll defend tonight. Hopefully palling around with Edwin MacPhisto and Grand Slam taught him a thing or two. Rules: Singles match, DQ and countout apply. Word Limit: 6000 Send To: realitycheck MAIN EVENT #3 TAG TITLE REMATCH Spike Jenkins & Sean Davis© vs Todd Cortez & Mike Van Siclen Hollywood Boulevard is cashing in the rematch clause. Rules: Tag match, DQ and countout apply. Word Limit: 6000 Send To: Suicide King SINGLES MATCH Johnny Dangerous vs Manson After losing the big strap at Genesis, Secret Agent Man is looking to take out his frustrations. Manson is a veteran of hardcore struggles, so he can take it as well as he can dish it out. Rules: Singles match, DQ and countout apply. Word Limit: 5000 Send To: 5_moves_of_doom USJL TITLE CONTENDERSHIP TRIANGLE MATCH Nathan Xavier vs Jamie Drazon vs Ryan Dustin David Cross seeks an opponent, and one of these two will be it. I don’t count Jamie Drazon because we have a shoot feud from way back when. Rules: Singles match, DQ and countout apply. When one man is eliminated, the other two continue a singles match. Word Limit: 5500 Send To: Grand Slam CRUSIERWEIGHT TITLE CONTENDERSHIP Austin Sly vs The Birdman Wait, you mean the Birdman isn’t the champ yet? Ouch, no, I kid, I kid. Austin Sly, in fact, probably is closer. But there are a lot of people close to that title these days. Rules: Singles match, DQ and countout apply. Word Limit: 4500 Send To: chirs3 HARDCORE TITLE CONTENDERSHIP THREE WAY LAST BLOOD Christian Fury vs David Cross vs Danny Dagda Can Fury regain his Fury from the ML days? Could David Cross become a dual champion? Could Dadga strike it big? All these things and more in this match. Rules: None. Last person to not bleed wins. He who bleeds is eliminated from the match. Word Limit: 5000 Send To: realitycheck SINGLES MATCH Uncle Filthy vs Stryke In the opening match, the returning Stryke will do battle with a newbie... who’s not so new in the skin, Uncle Filthy. Rules: Singles match, DQ and countout apply. Word Limit: 4000 Send To: Thoth

Do it.

Tag: ThothBeyond Capcom VS SNK 2 EO Magic: Battlegrounds Project Gotham Racing 2 Guilty Gear X2#Reload

Huzzah! But actually, I think it was called the Compaq Center for a bit... But now, it's the HP Pavilion, AKA "The Shark Tank". Pays to be an hour from San Jose, too. That's probably the case, I moved from NorCal 3 years ago.

The hell? I suck at writing descriptions. None of that really means anything at all.