chirs3

People cheer as Genesis VII kicks back up. "One and the Same" by Audiohead reverberates through the stadium. The oval SmarkTron hovering over the Rogers Centre's scoreboard sparks to life with a montage of highlights featuring a young indy wrestler. "The Crush" flash before Scotty Raina's smiling face beams down on the SWF faithful. Mak Francis and the Suicide King are shown seated at the announce table while the bell rings the start of the next match. "A fine showing from JJ Johnson and 'The Unique Youth' in our first match, but we're not through yet!" exclaims King, "No, that's only the first helping of the fine buffet of wrestling expertise at our biggest of shows, Genesis Seven!" Scotty Raina practically leaps out from behind the curtain at the left outfield. The Crush pumps his fists and yells out to the crowd standing below him. "How right you are, so many great matches yet to come! Jenkins versus the Divine Wind; Deathwish and his unnamed opponent, and of course the big one, Flesher and Stevens for the Cruiserweight AND World Titles! The Commissioner came through in the clutch this year, wouldn't you say?" asks Francis. "Our next match," booms Funyon, "Is a Fatal Fourway Elimination Match! Introducing first, from Detroit, Michigan, and weighing in at two hundred twenty five pounds... Scotty... THE CRUSH... RAAAAAAIIIIIIINNAAAAAA!" Scotty high fives a few fans at ringside before sliding under the bottom rope to enter the ring. He steps to the center ring and thrusts his arms to the fans at waist-height as white pyro flies from the ring posts. "Raina is a fresh import from one of the many fine Independant Leagues, a fresh talent who comes in highly touted," says Francis. "Remember Mak," starts King, "All the talent in the world won't do much if you don't have that drive... that WILL to succeed!" "You mean, will to win at all costs up to and including cheating?" asks Mak. "Of course," says King, "Not only is he up against another 'fresh' talent, but two grizzled veterans of the ring in MANSON and Rageheart! Those are rough odds for anyone, Francis, you have to admit that." As Raina's theme cuts out, the Rogers Centre becomes bathed in darkness. What little light the moon can shed upon the arena helps accentuate the twisted, demonic warbling coming through the sound system. The horrific sounds grow louder and louder as fans begin to stand to their feet, their attention turned towards the right outfield. The suspense is so thick you could cut it with a knife... "Here comes trouble!" exclaims King. ...Seizure inducing strobe lights flash and pulse as "Scientific Remote Viewing" by Cephalic Carnage The robed MANSON flings the curtain aside and strides out to the top of the entrance ramp, slowly viewing the jeering masses below him. "His opponent," begins Funyon, "From Denver Colorado, and weighing in at two hundred thirty pounds... He is the RAGING BULL... MAAAAAAAANSOOOOOOOOOON!" MANSON throws his hood back and strides purposefully down the ramp, ignoring the boos raining down from the crowd. "MANSON hasn't had the best track record of late," says Francis, "Nor has Scott Rageheart for that matter, I'm certain that both men are highly motivated to try and come out of Genesis with a momentum-inducing win." "Highly motivated and highly dangerous," starts King, "MANSON and Rageheart have that 'it', that special something that makes them want it more, I suspect both men with use experience and drive to bull past the two newcomers and make it to the final fall." "For all this talk of an 'it' factor," retorts Mak, "It sure hasn't shown up in the win columns of late." Momentarily humbled, King's microphone produces nothing but silence. Meanwhile MANSON has started to climb the ring steps, removing his belt and dropping his robe as he steps upon the apron. Raina takes his corner... far far away from MANSON as the God of War steps through the ropes. He takes a quick moment to spit towards Scotty before settling down to his preferred corner. Just as darkness had prevailed before MANSON, the Centre now becomes awash in light. The pickup verse from "Knights of Cydonia" by Muse begins to play... "No one's going to take me alive The time has come to make things right You and I must fight for our rights You and I must fight to survive" BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM! Clad in pure white, the masked Scion of Light bounces from behind the curtain as white pyromatics go off in front of her. She freezes in a pose with one arm bent towards her head, and the other straight up, allowing the moment to be absorbed by the fans. "Their next opponent," begins Funyon, "From Kyoto, Japan, and weighing in at one hundred sixty pounds... the SCION of LIIIIIIIGHT!" "I'm sure whatever 'it' this one has, it's not about to result in a win," muses King. "You know the old chestnut, don't judge a book by its cover," chides Mak, "We've had women come into the league and take out the bigger, stronger men before, and there's no indication that our latest Japanese import, the Scion of Light, can't do the job." "Oh, I'm sure she can do the JOB," says King, chuckling. Without warning, the Scion breaks from her pose and runs full speed towards the ring and slides under the bottom rope. She pops instantly to her feet and makes the same pose in the center of the ring to the cheers of the audience. Those cheers quickly turn to boos as "Exciter" by Judas Priest comes on full blast. A short pyro blast preceeds the blonde haired, blue eyed Scott Rageheart's entrance from behind the curtain. "Last but not least," says Funyon, "From Lethbridge, Alberta, Canada... weighing in at two hundred fourty five pounds.... SCOTT. RAAAAAAGEHEEAAAAAARRRRRRT!" "Just like MANSON, this man is hungry and he's ready for a win," starts King, "And woe be to the new fools that will try and get in his way." "Woe be?" asks Mak. "Shut up, basic point is that my prediction of MANSON and Rageheart to finish this elimination match will stand. You watch." "And who do you think will win out of those two?" asks Mak. "It's a tossup, too close to call!" exclaims King. "I'm sure it is." Rageheart jogs down the ramp, his eyes not moving away from his opponents in the ring. He walks to the one unmanned corner and hops up to the ring apron, removing his white T-shirt before the festivities begin. All four people step into the ring, while the referee tries to get two of them to step back so the match can start in earnest. "I'm not sure if these guys got the memo," says King, "But this is a fatal fourway, elimination rules. For you folks at home needing the reminder, only two people can be in the ring at any time. They can tag out to either of the other two participants until one person is finally eliminated. With only one person left to tag in and out, the remaining three fight until one more is eliminated, leaving the final two for the last fall. Pinfall, submission, DQ or countout, it doesn't matter how you go as long as you do!" MANSON thumps his chest towards Rageheart in a motion saying 'I got this'. Rageheart shrugs as he steps back through the ropes to his corner. Raina and the Scion look towards each other momentarily confused. The referee explains the situation to them both. The Scion taps The Crush on the shoulder and thumps her right fist into her open left hand three times. Raina seems to realize the idea and gets his fist ready as well. "What are these two morons doing?" asks King incredulously. 1 2 3 SHOOT! Raina extends two fingers in the shape of scissors, while the Scion leaves her hand flat like paper. Defeated, she steps back through the ropes and lets the Crush start the match against MANSON. DING! DING! DING! The crowd's laughter dies down as MANSON and Raina hook up in a collar elbow tie-up. Both men set their feet and brace themselves, but MANSON gets the upper hand by pushing Scotty backwards to the mat. "Such strength! He certainly earned the nickname The Raging Bull!" exclaims King. Raina pops to his feet and shakes off the bump. Loosening up, he signals to his opponent that he wants another go. The two men lock up again and again MANSON throws the smaller man back first to the mat. A third time Raina dusts himself off and locks up with the stronger man, this time with the Crush swiftly countering to a side headlock. MANSON shoves Raina off of him, with Scotty rebounding off the ropes and hitting his straightened out opponent with an acrobatic dropkick! The crowd cheers as the Raging Bull falls to the mat for the first time. "A bit of a technical start from these two, which is not the most comfortable situation for MANSON," notes Mak. Raina gets up first and runs to the opposite ropes as MANSON rises to his feet. On Scotty's return, the Savage Messiah attempts a clothesline but the Crush ducks underneath. Raina bounces off the opposite ropes and comes off with a flying forearm sending both men to the mat. Scotty scrambles to make the quick cover... ONE TWO TH---KICKOUT! "It's going to take more than that to take out the veteran," says King, "This ain't no scrub indie league, you have to EARN your wins here." "Are you always so harsh on the newcomers?" asks Francis. "Only the talentless hacks." "Ouch," replies Mak. Raina rises to his feet, pulling MANSON up with him. He delivers one... two... three sharp knees to MANSON's midsection before running to the ropes. He bounces off and leaps, grabbing the Raging Bull by his proverbial horns before landing and drilling his head to the mat in a vicious bulldog! Without skipping a beat, Raina scrambles to his feet and runs to the near ropes. He jumps, landing on the second rope, and leaps backwards making a perfect arc in the air before landing with a thud on MANSON's midsection. He quickly hooks a leg and the ref drops to make a count... ONE TWO---KICKOUT! "MANSON got out of that pin a bit quicker, I think he's sensing some danger coming from the rookie," notes Mak. "Or more likely, he's done toying with the youngster and wants to take him out NOW," muses King. MANSON manages to get to his feet before his opponent, and throws a vicious jab at his face. He follows with a second, garnering a warning from the referee. A third... a fourth... a fifth follow and Raina is reeling. He takes the young man's wrist and tries to give him an Irish Whip to the corner, but Raina stops his momentum and turns! He sends MANSON into the corner with all his might. The Raging Bull shudders on impact and drops to the mat in a seated position. Raina grins and calls out to the crowd, who get ramped up waiting for what's to come. LET'S GO SCOTTY! *CLAP CLAP CLAPCLAPCLAP* LET'S GO SCOTTY! *CLAP CLAP CLAPCLAPCLAP* Raina scuffs his feet on the mat like a bull, the runs full speed towards his fallen opponent. Halfway to his target he leaps in the air and lands a vicious dropkick to the fallen man's face! MANSON's eyes loll in his head as Raina pulls him out and hooks a leg for another cover... ONE TWO THRE----KICKOUT! The crowd groans audibly, not believing the three didn't drop. "The fans seem to be disappointed, and so does The Crush who seems to think that he should have had the three," says Mak. "Arguing with the referee will get you nowhere, Francis," says King, "But distracting yourself will only help your opponent! You can't take your eye off the prize and it looks like Scotty here may learn that the hard way." King's words prove true as Raina stops gabbing with the ref long enough to realize that MANSON has made his way across the ring towards a corner. He rushes over but is too late as MANSON slaps the hand of Scott Rageheart. The crowd starts to jeer as Rageheart comes in with a flurry of punches to Raina's dome. After five jabs the referee puts his hands in and separates the two, giving Rageheart a verbal warning. Raina tries to rush in with a surprise clothesline but Rageheart ducks under and heads to the ropes. Raina sets himself upright to try and take his opponent down, but Rageheart's running shoulderblock gives him other ideas. The Crush scrambles to make it back up to his feet but Rageheart is too quick and delivers another shoulderblock to knock him back down. "Scotty... er... Scott. No..." says Mak, "RAGEHEART taking the newcomer down a peg or two and turning the tide in his favor. Man, I hope someone tags if only so we don't have two Scotts in the ring." "I know what you mean," says King chuckling, "I'd hate to be one of the ringside reporters having to type this all out!" "Yeah," says Mak with a laugh, "It has to suck to be those guys!" "Yeah it does!" exclaims King. Rageheart pulls the Crush up to his feet and locks him up in a front facelock. He throws his opponent's arm over his head and grabs Raina by the top of his tights. With a grunt, he lifts the newcomer up and vertical, holding him up in mid-suplex. Two, three, four seconds go by, and some of the crowd starts to ooh and aah in spite of themselves. Then suddenly Rageheart drops and slams his victim to the mat. Raina's body goes still and Rageheart takes that as a good time to hook a leg for a cover... ONE TWO THRE----KICKOUT! "Scott sure took the wind out of Scott's sails," says King. "I don't know what Scott will do if Scott keeps this pressure up," says Mak. "Scott," says King. Raina tries to crawl towards the Scion's corner but Rageheart grabs him by the arm and pulls him back. Holding him by the head, Rageheart drives his knee into the Crush's midsection. He does so again, and again until spittle starts to fly out of the newcomer's mouth. Propping him up, Rageheart whips Raina to the ropes and drops down for a back drop. The Crush avoids it by hopping over the other Scott. Raina bounces off the rope, and barely ducks under a clothesline thrown by Rageheart. LET'S GO SCOTTY! *CLAP CLAP CLAPCLAPCLAP* LET'S GO SCOTTY! *CLAP CLAP CLAPCLAPCLAP* Rageheart sighs in frustration, taking a split second longer to turn around and face his opponent... who bounces off the ropes full speed and SPEARS him! Rageheart's body goes limp as he falls to the mat. Raina barely has the wherewithal to drape an arm over for the cover... ONE TWO THRE--EEEEEEE! DING DING DING! "And just like that, Rageheart is gone!!!" exclaims Mak, "Scott Rageheart has had some tough luck of late, but the newcomer comes up with a huge elimination!" "The match isn't over yet, remember!" says King. In a flash MANSON drops an elbow on the eliminator, just as Rageheart is being rolled out of the ring. On his feet, the Raging Bull stomps on the fallen Raina. He pulls the newcomer up to his feet but recieves an elbow to the gut for his services. MANSON tries for a front facelock but recieves another elbow just the same. Raina doesn't wait to deliver a third before desperately scurrying to the ropes. He hops up and hits the second rope, jumping back towards MANSON and wrapping his legs around the Raging Bull's head. Raina's weight pulls down hard and MANSON's sore head takes another spike to the mat. The Scion of Light reaches out frantically, egging on Raina to finally make a tag, but the Crush ignores her and goes back towards MANSON. "I know you want to make a mark as a newcomer, but in a match like this endurance is key," says Mak, "That could be a mistake from the rookie not to tag out." "Especially when you've just gotten a fluke fall over one veteran, don't expect to take out another one just like that!" exclaims King. Outside the ring, Rageheart begins to gather his senses. He climbs the apron under the belief he tagged out somehow, but the ref stops him, quickly explaining the situation. Scott gapes incredulously as the ref goes back to the action, where Raina plants another knee into his opponent's gut. With a hop, Raina hits the ropes... and falls flat on his face as Rageheart's hand sneaks in and trips him! Boos rain down as the referee screams at Rageheart and demands that he leave ringside. Raina slowly gets to his feet and turns to see the man that tripped him. The Crush gets riled up and begins to yell at the man that sabotaged his attack. The two go back and forth verbally until all of a sudden Raina drops backwards. The ref turns to see the newcomer rolled up in a schoolboy rollup! He drops to make the count... ONE TWO THREEEEE!!! DING DING DING "What a sneak way to get an elimination!" chides Mak, "No class whatsoever!" "This isn't a style competition, Francis!" says King, "It's a fight, and in a fight you do what you can to win. That's why MANSON is still in this shindig and Raina's going buhbye!" Raina rolls to his knees and rubs the back of his head. He first stares unbelievingly at the referee, then when reality sets in he gazes upon the grinning Rageheart on the outside. The Crush rushes outside where Rageheart awaits and the two begin an all out brawl. Another official heads down to ringside to try and break the two up while the referee signals the Scion to enter the ring. "How cute, little Scotty's made a new friend," says King snidely, "Welcome to the SWF kid, we ain't friendly!" "That's quite the brawl on the outside, but inside is where the legal action is, and we'll finally get a chance to see what this Scion of Light has," says Mak. MANSON, on his feet now, taunts the smaller fighter. He motions for S.O.L. to enter, smiling with the intent to cause pain. The Scion begins to step through, but pulls back as MANSON makes a move to rush at her. The Savage Messiah backs off as she steps closer towards the middle of the ring apron, warily eyeing her opponent. She starts to step through the ropes, and again the Raging Bull starts to rush at her. LET'S GO SCION! *CLAP CLAP CLAPCLAPCLAP* LET'S GO SCION! *CLAP CLAP CLAPCLAPCLAP* "Fickle audience," remarks King. The brawl on the outside is quickly rushed backstage as the referee starts to count for the Scion to come in. In response, S.O.L. pulls on the top rope and leaps up. Landing on the top rope, she flies off and catches MANSON full in the face with a dropkick! The crowd cheers as the Scion runs to the ropes. She bounces back and drops a quick leg on MANSON's head! Floating over for a quick cover, the ref drops for a count... ONE TW----KICKOUT! MANSON gorilla presses the woman off of him, sending her flying back! "Is this woman supposed to be a Power Ranger, or Hulk Hogan?" asks King. "MANSON's taken a lot of damage to the cranium," remarks Mak, "It's not too far off to think that he might be stunned after that beautiful top rope dropkick!" "He's not called the Raging Flamingo, Mak. He's called the Raging BULL. It takes more than a souped up dropkick to take a man like that down." MANSON powers up to his feet just as the Scion runs to the ropes. She leaps up to the second rope and jumps off for a cross body... only to get caught in the Raging Bull's arms! "I was going to mention how the Scion is down a good seventy pounds to MANSON," says King, "But it looks like he's just going to demonstrate that fact for me!" MANSON lifts his victim up a couple of inches before dropping to one knee and driving the side of S.O.L's torso into the other! A high pitched scream escapes the Scion's lips. The Savage Messiah rises to his feet only to drop down again, driving his knee harder into the woman's side. The crowd jeers MANSON who shrugs and simply hefts the struggling woman up onto his shoulders in a Fireman's carry... "Look how effortlessly MANSON moves this woman around like a rag doll!" Suicide King exclaims, "How can you say he's not the favorite to take this one home?" "I begrudgingly have to agree with you here," says Mak, "The Scion may be in some heavy trouble in her first match here!" ...Grunting MANSON lifts the woman high off his shouders and drops back, lifting both knees up in time to drive the dropping woman's ribs right onto them! Sympathetic groans are heard from the crowd as the Scion rolls off, clutching her midsection. MANSON rolls over and hooks a leg in a very loose cover... ONE TWO THRE-----KICKOUT! OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! "INCREDIBLY close kickout, you have to admire the guts in this newcomer," says Mak. "I'm surprised we can't all admire her guts... all over the mat after that Gutbuster!" quips King. MANSON shakes his head as he drags the woman up by her blonde hair. The referee admonishes him but the Raging Bull pays him no mind. Propping his victim up, MANSON wraps his arms around the Scion's waist, pops his hip, and hefts the woman high over his head with a grunt! The Scion of Light crashes down behind him, motionless. "Railgun Belly to Belly!" exclaims Mak, "MANSON's taking no quarter here, he wants a win at Genesis VII!" "Veteran smarts, Mak. I told you, MANSON won't be making any rookie mistakes like Raina," remarks King. MANSON saunters over to his fallen opponent and drops and elbow to her midsection. Nonchalantly, he rolls his back onto her stomach for the pin... ONE TWO THREE------KICKOUT! LET'S GO SCION! *CLAP CLAP CLAPCLAPCLAP* "EVEN CLOSER!" yells Mak, as the Suicide King removes his headset to rub his ears, "It's obvious the Scion is hurting, I know you want to win your first big match but I don't know how more she can take after those two big shots!" MANSON grumbles at the referee, slapping his hands in a three count in front of him. The referee shows him two fingers but MANSON ignores him. The Raging Bull rises to his feet and plants a few hard stomps in S.O.L's side before bending over to force her back up to her feet. Grabbing her wrist, MANSON yanks hard and whips the woman into the far corner. She slumps upon impact, showing no motion to fight. MANSON revs up and charges her with his arm extended for a clothesline... but gets nothing but turnbuckle as the Scion uses the top rope to pull herself out of the way. The crowd comes to life as the Scion springboards up off the second rope, turns in mid-air and grabs MANSON's head on her way down... SLAM! The crowd explodes into cheers as MANSON rolls on the mat, holding his head and kicking the canvas in pain. Scion staggers up to her full height, only to drop a knee down... onto plain canvas! MANSON rolls to his side and gets up with the help of the ropes, holding his throbbing noggin in his hand. "Scion, trying to capitalize on MANSON's mistake, makes one of her own," says Mak, "A rookie mistake, as King might say." "MANSON would have driven the win home given an opening like that," says King "As you said, a rookie mistake!" MANSON grabs his opponent by the wrist, attempting to shake his cobwebs out. With a jerk and a turn, MANSON whips the Scion towards the corner... but the Scion stops in her tracks and uses her momentum against her opponent! With a jerk and a turn, she whips the Raging Bull towards the ropes! He slams against the corner, his head snapping back viciously. Scion takes a deep breath and backs up into the far corner. She rushes at her opponent, cartwheeling... backflipping... then launching herself backwards with a wicked elbow to MANSON's forehead! "What an athletic maneuver!" exclaims Mak, "Given an OPENING from the Savage Messiah, the Scion took full advantage!" LET'S GO SCION! *CLAP CLAP CLAPCLAPCLAP* LET'S GO SCION! *CLAP CLAP CLAPCLAPCLAP* The Scion backs off and watches as her opponent starts to stagger out from the corner. Judging spaces and distances, the Scion heads back towards the ropes. Still foggy, MANSON stumbles towards the center of the ring as the Scion rebounds back full speed and steps up into a HARD SUPERKICK to the Raging Bull's face! The crowd goes wild as the kick takes MANSON up off his feet before he lands with a thud on the mat! "CLEANSING BEAM! Our scouts told us about her high-speed Superkick finisher! Right when MANSON was at his groggiest, this could be it!!!" exclaims Mak. Scion rushes to her fallen opponent and hooks a leg for the cover... ONE TWO THREE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! DING DING DING "Knights of Cydonia" kicks up in full stride as the referee raises the rising Scion's hand in victory! "Your winner of the Fatal Fourway.... THE SCION... OF.... LIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIGHT!" announces Funyon. The Scion of Light strikes her traditional Kamen pose, only to massage her sore stomach immediatly afterwards. A few chuckles mix in the with the cheers erupting from the Rogers Centre. "An impressive victory for the ROOKIE," says Mak, "The Scion of Light coming into the SWF in her first match and outlasting three men..." "Outlasting? She never even took or threw a punch until two of them were gone!" yells King. "Even still, she's the last one standing in the center of the ring. Not to take away from Raina who had an impressive showing taking out the veteran Scott Rageheart." "Will we see hot Scott on Scott action in the next show?" asks King. "That's horrible," says Mak. "I know, but I couldn't help it. Still, something to think about, and you know MANSON is going to want revenge for being upset by a wisp of a girl." "I wouldn't call a buck-sixty a wisp..." "Still," interrupts King, "There will be time enough to ponder these things later, because next up... Danny Williams against... somebody! Don't go away!"

Zyon vs. JJJ = TBEI.

-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- SWF GENESIS VII Live, Monday, September 18th, from the Rogers Centre at Skydome in Toronto, Canada! (7pm PST, 10pm EST; check local listings) (Send all promos/marked matches to chirs3) -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- SWF WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT/CRUISERWEIGHT CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH Michael Stephens © vs. Tom Flesher © They have a combined total of 20 titles won. They were both named Heel of the Year. They were both named World Champion of the Year. They were both named Wrestler of the Year. Both men have left their mark on the federation - both will be remembered as winners, as champions, and as legends... But after tonight, only one of them will be remembered as the best. This match will be fought under standard singles match rules. -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- SWF INTERNATIONAL CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH - OLD SCHOOL RULES Bruce Blank © vs. "The Dean of Professional Wrestling" Jay Hawke After Bruce Blank won the International Championship Open Invitiational, Joseph Peters tried desperately to convert him into a man worthy of the belt. Whether or not he has succeeded is open for debate, but Blank must be doing something right, as over a month later he's still going strong. But that might be about to change. Bruce said a while ago that his International Title Reign would make people say "Jay Who?" But it seems like Jay Hawke has taken issue with that! The longest reigning International Champion in SWF History has clashed with Bruce on more that one occasion in recent weeks, and he managed to come out on top both times! And with Bruce's expertise being geared more towards the Hardcore end of the spectrum, Hawke's self-selected Pure Rules will only heighten the challenge for Blank to retain his title. Then again, Bruce is no stranger to record setting title reigns, and now that he's found a home in the International Division, odds are he will do anything to stay on top there. This match will be fought under Old School Rules. Two out of three falls, with a 60 minute time limit. Each wrestler has three rope breaks per fall. Throwing an opponent over the top rope is an immediate disqualification, and disqualifications and countouts WILL result in a title change! -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- GRUDGE MATCH Wildchild vs. Mike Van Siclen We already knew that Wildchild was a force to be reckoned with in the ring, but ever since Mike Van Siclen returned, we've seen a new side of this Bahaman - a side that excels at psychological warfare. Having driven MVS nearly to the brink of insanity (having pulled some pranks worthy of Midnight Carnival itself), these two will finally meet in the match Wildchild has been itching for - and the match Mike Van Siclen has been desperately trying to avoid! This match will be fought without countouts, and without disqualifications. -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- CAGE MATCH Landon "La Cucaracha" Maddix © vs. "The Beast" Gabriel Drake Gabriel Drake has been an unsettling presence ever since his debut in the SWF. He has beaten everyone the bookers have thrown at him, and has his eyes set squarely on our World Champion. There is history there, but Landon Maddix doesn't care much for history, and he went out on a limb to get a match with Drake, in the hopes of shutting him down. Instead, he was jumped backstage, beaten into a bloody mess, and left as an example for all future opponents. Despite his partner's warnings, Maddix demanded this rematch, and JP was more than happy to oblige. More epicness to come... This match will be fought inside a 15 foot high steel cage. Bars, not the wussy fence kind. The first man to score a pinfall or submission, or to successfully escape the cage and plant both feet firmly on the ground, will be the winner. -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- FIRST BLOOD MATCH Johnny Dangerous vs. Charlie "Grappler" Matthews One of the all time SWF greats, Johnny Dangerous, made his return to the SWF last Smarkdown. He was set to compete against Main-Event Mainstay Tom Flesher, in what many predicted would be a Match of the Year candidate. But a combonation of Johnny's eagerness and Tom's lack thereof led to the match being called off, but not before Charlie Matthews got involved. Johnny's chance to upstage the #1 Contender was lost, and now he's out for blood. But with Tom engaged in the Main Event, Johnny will have to settle for someone else's blood: Charlie Matthews'. This match will be fought under First Blood rules - the first man to cause his opponent to bleed is the winner. The referee must see the blood in order to end the match. -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- SWF HARDCORE CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH Jimmy the Doom © vs. The Crimson Skull Where do I even begin? The short version would be that The Crimson Skull has kidnapped Lois the Unethical, and rather than call the police and let the authorities sort this thing out, Joseph Peters has convinced these two to settle it at Genesis, with the Hardcore Title on the line! Jimmy's no slouch in the hardcore department, but The Crimson Skull is a dastardly villain indeed, and is sure to have more tricks up his sleeve that simply dangling Lois above a shark tank. It's a race against time - for the life of a beautiful woma... well, a woman... and for the SWF Hardcore Championship! This match will be fought under... some very bizarre rules. Lois the Unethical will be suspended 100 feet above the ring - I'm sorry, I mean above the shark tank. Jimmy the Doom and The Crimson Skull will begin the match deep undergound, beneath the arena. In order to win the match, retain his title, and save the girl, Jimmy the Doom must reach the controls to free Lois before she is lowered into the shark tank (roughly one hour). If The Crimson Skull is able to stop him from reaching the controls, he will become the Hardcore Champion (and a murderer ). -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- SWF CRUISERWEIGHT CHAMPIONSHIP #1 CONTENDERS MATCH "Hollywood" Spike Jenkins vs. "The Divine Wind" Akira Kaibatsu Two of the federation's top Cruiserweights clash for a shot at the title on AftershoxxxXXxxXXx! Both men will undoubtedly be bringing their A-Game for Genesis, but for these two, it's going to go well beyond this show! The winner of this match will face the winner of tonight's Main Event on AftershoxxXxXXx, for the Cruiserweight title! And THEN they'll be defending against The Unique Youth, Zyon, who won a shot at the title on Smarkdown! Tonight is not the end of their chase for Cruiserweight gold - befitting the name of Genesis, tonight, their journey begins. This match will be fought under standard singles match rules, with the Cruiserweight addenda: it is illegal to throw your opponent over the top rope, and the count on the outside is extended to 20. -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- MYSTERY MATCH "Deathwish" Danny Williams vs. ??? When people issue open challenges, we pay attention. When DANNY FREAKIN' WILLIAMS issues an open challenge, the line of competitors wanting to accept usually wraps around whatever arena we're in. Twice. Danny's invitation for Genesis 7 was accepted immediately, but his opponent has yet to reveal him or her-self publically! We're not even sure Danny himself knows! This match will be fought under standard singles match rules. Send your match to Ace309. -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- FATAL FOURWAY ELIMINATION MATCH The Scion of Light vs. Scotty "The Crush" Raina vs. MANSON vs. Scott Rageheart Two newcomers make their debut - what better time than Genesis? There will be no Ced Ordonez's or Martin Hunt's to boost their ego. The Scion of Light and Scott "The Crush" Raina will compete against each other in their debut match, but not ONLY against each other! Two SWF veterans, who have fallen on hard times in recent weeks, will get to play welcoming committee, and try to turn their luck around. Will one of our newbies steal the show, and the Genesis spotlight? This match will be fought under Elimination Rules, with two persons in the ring at any given moment. The other two will stand in their respective corners, and can be tagged in or out at any time. Eliminations can occur via pinfall, countout, submission, or disqualification. -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- TWO OUT OF THREE FALLS MATCH "The Unique Youth" Zyon vs. JJ Johnson Two long-time rivals will clash one final time, on the biggest stage of them all. Their history stands at 4-3, in favor of the Unique Youth, who definitely has a momentum boost coming into this match, having just defeated The Birdman in singles competition! JJ's recent exploits have been far less noteworthy, and some are beginning to question whether or not he's still got "it". What better time and place to find out than Genesis? This match will be fought to two out of three falls, with a 30 minute time limit. -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-

Ian,his wight is 42 3/4 ponuds,4 foot tall,from Palm Bay,FL. Larkin,her wight is 39 5/8,3 foot & 5 inches tall,NY. DING! Ian kicks Larkin. Larkin kicks back. Ian throws Larkin out of the ring. ONE! TWO! THREE! FOUR! FIVE! SIX! SEVEN! EIG...NO! Larkin gets back into the ring. Then Larkin Throws Ian out of the ring. ONE! TWO! THREE! FOUR! FIVE! SIX! SEVEN! EIGHT! NINE! TE..NO! Ian gets back in the ring. Ian pins Larkin. ONE! TWO! THR..NO! Larkin pins Ian. ONE! TWO! TH...NO! Larkin kicks Ian so hard. Ian was hurt. Ian does a Rock Bottom. Ian pins Larkin. ONE! TWO! THR..NO! Ian does a F-5. Ian pins Larkin. ONE! TWO! THR..NO! Ian gets out of the ring. Larkin does the same thing as Ian. ONE! TWO! THREE! FOUR! FIVE! SIX! SEVEN! EIGHT! NINE! TE..NO! Larkin is still out of the ring. ONE! TWO! THREE! FOUR! FIVE! SIX! SEVEN! EIGHT! NINE! TE..NO! Larkin gets back in the ring. Ian throws Larkin back out of the ring. ONE! TWO! THREE! FOUR! FIVE! SIX! SEVEN! EIGHT! NINE! TEN! DING! DING! DING! And our winner is Ian by count out!

"WELCOME TO THE SMARTMARKS WRESTLING FEDERATION'S BIGGEST EVENT OF ALL TIME, SWF GENESIS SEVEN!" The resounding sound of Carl Orff's "O Fortuna" echoes about the open stadium, as the roar of the crowd overtakes the camera microphones at the Rogers Center in the Toronto Skydome! Far above the heads of the crowd the night sky twinkles with stars, starts blotted out by the bright lights of the arena below, an arena filled to the brim with wrestling fans with signs ranging from the bizarre ("My child's Wild!") to the awkwardly disrespectful ("Stephens = My Drug!") and downright bizarre. ("G0R0!"). One of the biggest events in SWF history is taking place on this night, and everyone knows what that event is. SWF Genesis. The seventh, to be redundant. As the cameras pan down to the ringside area, there appears to be some sort of scuffle going on at the right-hand entrance to the ringside area. Specifically, numerous wrestlers who are pushing and shoving their way past security and heading for the ring. In the lead is everyone's favourite former Pokemaniac, Michael Craven. He's tailed by some of the SWF's less-than-greats - Cutthroat, Tokyo X, David Blazenwing (who, apparently, is tired of interviewing Landon) and the peanut-loving Mark Kinxx. As they approach the ringside area, we're finally treated to a view of the announce table, where Mak Francis and the Suicide King are seated, regarding the situation with perplexion and mild curiousity respectively. "And here we are at Genesis, about to have the pre-show Frost match, but it looks like things are going to get messy before we've even started, King. I have no idea where these guys came from..." "The reject shop?" King inquires with dry snideness. "But..." the Franchise continues. "It seems they have some business in the ring." Indeed, having battered their way past security, the group of misfits has found their way into the ring. With Craven at their head and his four associates flanking him, they look out at the massive crowd, who instantly starts booing. They came here to see Genesis, not a band of wrestling rejects. Finally, the former King of Nightmares clears his throat, while his companions pace about the ring. Eventually, the mass of boos dies down, at least to the point where Craven is actually capable of speaking and being heard at the same time. His voice is unamused, one could almost say harsh. "I can't believe you're going to be watching this!" he snarls. "Is he... dissing Genesis?" Mak asks his partner with a raised eyebrow. "Hell if I know." answers the Gambling Man. "But at least he's getting heat for it." "I mean, look at yourselves." the former King of Nightmares continues. "You're here, at Genesis. At the biggest SWF show in the history of the federation. And instead of being exposed to wrestling first off, you're exposed to retardation and stupidity! Ian? Larkin? That washed up bag of bones the Boston Strangler!? What makes you people buy this sort of crap instead of wanting real wrestlers like me! Like Cutthroat, and Blazenwing, and my other friends here!?" "...the top of the card?" the Franchise quips dryly. "Tom." King adds with a sage nod. "Definitely Tom." "I mean, don't be ridiculous! You people wouldn't know good ratings if they bit you in the ass! And I don't care what security thinks - none of us do! We're not leaving this ring until this grave crime against wrestlers is removed from the card! Peters, get your ass out here! You're going to replace that foolishness with a match! A match with ME! And my associates here!" There's no response from the backstage area. "Peters, I'm..." While it's not possible for the arena to go completely black given the open roof and the stars above, it nevertheless gets very dark. All the lights in the arena have shut down, leaving only moonlight and camera flashes to illuminate the darkness. A deep voice resounds over the speakers, but it is in no language that the human mind is capable of understanding or deciphering. But that isn't so much of a problem, as the Smarktron - both the one on the face side, and the one on the heel side - offer a translation in flowing white text, with red smoke already rising in front of the entranceways. Thy next opponent is madness twinned; the forces of chaos and destruction combined. As the heavy riffs of a guitar echo from the speakers, the fans began to look at both entrances with more than a little curiousity. In the ring, Craven and company are also doing so, with the King of Nightmares looking supremely satisfied that he'll get his match. A black silhouette fills the red smoke on the left-hand entrance, and then the crowd cheers a little louder as one also appears at the right-hand entrance, almost perfectly mirrored. Then the song begins, and while people don't recognise it, its words portend doom. For the song is by Amon Amarth - specifically 'When Silent Gods Stand Guard'. The last head falls to the ground. No one is left alive. They thought that they could take us down. But it's not our time to die... The red smoke clears as the black silhouettes stride through it, causing the crowd to explode with cheers as spotlights track their paths towards the ring. For striding in from the face side, flick-scythe over his shoulder and a grim expression on his face, comes the Black Angel, Aecas. This in itself would be intimidating if not for the entrance of another colossus on the heel side, with glittering red eyes, a long white trenchcoat, and a rather psychotic demeanour. The Black Angel would be trouble enough, without the Hell Machine also present. Ten men are dead by our feet. We smell their steaming blood. And we smile, cause it makes us... Makes us feel so good. "Well, THIS is a development." the Franchise comments. "I loved Craven and all, but with these two psychopaths coming out, I don't think I'd throw my lot in with him." "Wise words, King." Mak agrees. "It seems they believe in Craven for SOME reason though..." The Franchise speaks the truth, as Craven looks left and right, and yells at his associates. They glance at each other, then at the approaching giants, and nod. Blazenwing and Cutthroat immediatley bail out on the left, and rush at the Black Angel. Kinxx and Tokyo X on the other hand dive out the right hand side and charge up the ramp at the approaching Hell Machine. The first person to reach them is dropped like a sack of stones - Aecas nails Blazenwing with a hellacious Decapitator, and Janus sends Mark Kinxx to the ramp with a vicious Knuckle Bomb. It seems their advance is not to be stopped, even as Cutthroat and Tokyo X respectively throw themselves at their opponents with a barrage of punches. And then a set of low blows. That gets a reaction from both giants most definitely as they cringe slightly and bend a little, enough to bring their faces within striking range. On the Black Angel's side of the ring, Cutthroat begins to hammer him with right hands, while Tokyo X on the other hand begins smacking the Hell Machine's face from side to side a serious of backhands. Their hammering blows are both stopped mid-assault by hands clamping around their throats, and in almost perfect unison the two behemoths lift the troublemakers high and brutally chokeslam them on the steel ramp. The crowd's cheering is almost deafening at this point, as Michael Craven finds himself alone in the ring with both colossi staring at him as they approach. "It seems the former King of Nightmares' grand plan hasn't gone off the way he wanted it to, King." "Thank you for stating the obvious, Francis." the Gambling Man responds dryly. "There probably won't be much left of poor Craven after this." "Now who's being the obvious one?" As the two monsters roll in on either side of the ring, the former King of Nightmares darts back and forth to kick and stomp at them both, trying to force them away long enough for him to make his own escape. But Aecas puts a stop to that, catching Craven by the leg and yanking hard to trip him up, prompting another pop from the crowd as the two collosal figures stand tall in the ring. Security is already emerging to drag off the fallen associates of Michael Craven, who begins to rise to his feet and finds the two seven footers staring down at him ominously. The Hell Machine and the Black Angel look at each other for a long moment over their frightened quarry's head. Then Aecas slams a knee into Craven's abdomen and hoists him up, the crowd cheering loudly before the Black Angel brings him down on his head and shoulders with a violent Executioner! "RRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" But they're not done yet. Looking down at the broken Craven, Janus smiles, and murmurs something to Aecas before shrugging off his shoulders and making a lumbering run for the ropes behind the Black Angel. The crowd begins to rise to its feet, realising they're about to see a move that hasn't been performed in years. As the Hell Machine hits the ropes and comes back, Aecas shifts his grip on Craven's body and falls backwards in a catapulting motion, throwing the former King of Nightmares through the air.... and DIRECTLY into the path of the stampeding Hell Machine's GORE, completing the colossal move known as the... "SOUL CRUSHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!" King hollers, before clapping his hands over his mouth in surprise. "Fan, much?" Francis grins, poking fun at his commentating partner." "Low blow from someone who couldn't FEEL a low blow." the Gambling Man snaps back. The Franchise's retort is lost in the cheering of the crowd, as the two colossal figures hoist the dead weight of Michael Craven over the ropes to the outside, then roll out of the ring as the sound of Amon Amarth fills the air once more. The two giants glance over their shoulders at each other with grim smiles, the Hell Machine adjusting his coat and the Black Angel picking up his flick-scythe in mid-step, before they turn away and walk up the ramp. As the cameras cut to commercial - to clean up before Ian/Larkin, of course - the sound of the song is very audible. The last vision is of the two giants walking back through the red smoke of their respective entranceways, with Amon Amarth roaring in the background. We take the skulls to our shrines Where silent gods stood guard... ~Fin.~

SWF FROST PRE-PPV SHOW SINGLES MATCH Ian vs. Larkin Special Guest Referee: THE BOSTON STRANGLER~! Very few people in the SWF can claim to be undefeated. There's ELK... There's Mr. Galatea (all his losses were still moral victories)... And then, there's Ian. A few years back, for one night only, Longdogger Pete's son Ian competed in the SWF, and in an upset on par with Ash Ketchum defeating Chris Raynor in the G2 Tournament (JUMPING MEW DRIVAAAAAAH), the pint-sized wunderkind took down none other than The Boston Strangler. Since then, Ian has been pressed on numerous occasions to defend his undefeated streak, but the time and place were never right - that is, until Joseph Peters offered him Genesis. Thrilled with the idea of making his grand return at G7, Ian readily accepted the challenge - but the odds are not in his favor. First, his opponent - Larkin. Akira Kaibatsu's little sister. Same number of syllables as Ian, but twice as many letters - a clear advantage. No one has ever seen her wrestle and live to tell about it. Mainly because no one has ever seen her wrestle at all, but that will make her all the more difficult to predict. And under the tutelage of The Divine Wind... there's no telling what kind of fight she'll be bringing to the match. Second - never content to leave well enough alone (and also attempting to fill the retiree appearances quota for Genesis), Peters tracked down The Boston Strangler, and offered him a one night gig as the special referee! Has TBS made peace with his loss, or will he take every opportunity he can to hold the man (er, boy) down? This match will be fought under standard singles match rules.

EARLIER THIS WEEK... The Toronto press corps is gathered in front of a platform with two tables. On one side, Tom Flesher sits in a hooded sweatshirt and track pants, the hood up. Sweat drips from his face, and he periodically towels his face off. He is flanked by James Matheson and Allison Onita, both dressed in businesslike fashion. In the center is a podium, where Joseph Peters stands, and next to that is a digital scale with a large, easy-to-read display. On the other side, Amy Stephens sits next to a comfortable Michael Stephens, clad in his standard soccer jersey and baggy trousers. Peters taps the microphone. “Thank you for coming to the official SWF Genesis VII press conference,” Peters says. “Today, we’ll be conducting the official weigh-in for the SWF World Championship and Cruiserweight Championship match, the main event of our flagship event. “We’re proud to be kicking off our seventh year in business. In the past six years, we have had an impressive list of talent. We count among our ranks some of the most talented pure athletes ever to compete in professional sports: Danny Williams, Tyler McClelland, the Wildchild, and Mak Francis. They’ve been joined by true giants among men: Bruce Blank, the Boston Strangler, Nemesis and the HVille Thugg. The SWF has given opportunities to the best talent drawn from around the world, from as close to home as the Canadian Intelligence Agent and El Luchador Magnifico to athletes as well traveled as Japan’s Thoth and Australia’s Andrew Blackwell. We pride ourselves on allowing young talent, like Taylor Thompson, as well as seasoned veterans, like retired Judge William Hearford III, to showcase their abilities before an international audience. Today, the SWF boasts broadcasts to all regions of the globe – most notably including Australia, Great Britain, Canada, Denmark, and of course, the United States. “This week, our sixth year culminates and our seventh commences. We can think of no better way than to showcase our athletes at their best. “The Unique Youth, Zyon, will face off against Canadian sensation JJ Johnson in a classic two-out-of-three falls match. “A four-way elimination match featuring Japanese newcomer Scion of Light and fellow new face Scotty ‘the Crush’ Raina as well as veterans Manson and Scott Rageheart will be sure to light up the stage. “Veteran Danny Williams, who has served admirably as the SWF’s good-will ambassador to Japan, will take on a mystery opponent in a match certain to capture the interest of wrestling purists and new-style fans alike. “The Cruiserweight Champion will be crowned in the final match of the evening, but he’ll have to contend with either ‘Hollywood’ Spike Jenkins or Japanese high-flyer ‘The Divine Wind’ Akira Kaibatsu. “Jimmy the Doom and the Crimson Skull will settle their long-running feud and decide the Hardcore Championship in a match that I’d rather the Toronto Sun not cover.” Peters chuckles, and he’s met with strained laughter from the journalists. “Johnny Dangerous, one of our success stories, will meet the grizzled veteran Charlie ‘Grappler’ Matthews, who some of you may remember watching as children. Grappler’s one of the toughest wrestlers I’ve ever seen, and I have no doubt that the first blood match will be an instant classic. “A steel cage will be erected around the ring, and ‘the Beast’ Gabriel Drake will meet Landon ‘La Cucaracha’ Maddix, the SWF’s poster child for free trade with Spain and one-half of the SWF Tag Team Champions. “The Bahaman Bomber, the Wildchild, will settle his grudge with Mike Van Siclen in a match without count-outs or disqualifications. This one’s been building longer than I’ve been in charge of the booking, and I can’t wait to see this score settled. “SWF International Champion Bruce Blank will meet his nemesis, Jay Hawke, in an Old School Rules match. Special rules will govern countouts and disqualifications, and this match will be decided in two of three falls. “And, finally, the main event... SWF Cruiserweight Champion Tom Flesher will defend his title as well as challenge for Michael Stephens’ World Heavyweight Championship. Because the Cruiserweight Championship is being defended, the wrestlers will have to make the upper weight limit of 230 pounds, and we’ve decided to let you all in on what a real weigh-in looks like. First, I’d like to introduce a man who needs no introduction, the World Champion, Michael Stephens!” The World Champion stands up and takes the microphone. “I’m sorry, I’m not much for talking,” he says. “It’s been a long run up to the SWF World Heavyweight Championship, including a couple of wins over that fellow sitting on the other side of the podium. I don’t expect tonight to be any different.” Peters takes the microphone and says, “Michael, if you’d kindly step on the scale, please...” Stephens steps on the scale. The numbers read 221.5. Joe Peters announces, “Even wearing his street clothes, the World Champion is well under the 230-pound limit. Thank you, Michael, for your time.” He then turns to Flesher’s side of the podium. “His opponent at Genesis is one of the SWF’s mainstays. Like Mr. Stephens, Tom Flesher has been named Wrestler of the Year. He himself is a former Heavyweight Champion. At this time, Tom, if you have any remarks, feel free to make them.” James Matheson stands up as Flesher towels his face off once more. “My name is James Matheson,” he says, “and I’m Mr. Flesher’s manager. On behalf of Tom, I’d like to say how thrilled he is to be main-eventing Genesis once again. We’re confident that he’s going to walk out a winner, just as he did against Perfect Bo at Genesis III and just as he did in the main event of Genesis IV against Justice William Hearford. Now, without further ado, I’d like to let Tom weigh in.” Flesher stands up. Looking emaciated, he sheds his hooded sweatshirt and the t-shirt beneath it. He very carefully towels off, making sure to collect all of the sweat he can before stepping out of his warm-up pants as well. Once again, he towels off, and steps onto the scale wearing only a pair of blue boxer shorts. The scale reads 229.9. “Tom,” asks Joe Peters, “would you like to address the reporters?” Flesher looks at Peters, and quickly dons his hoodie once more. Allison Onita dutifully hands him a bottle of water, which he guzzles for a few moments before turning back to the press corps. “I’m sorry I’m not more personable today,” he says, “but if any of you have ever wrestled, you know that making weight is the most difficult part of the game. I’m pleased, though, that I have more time to recover, and that I won’t have to worry about a morning weigh-in on the day of the card as we so often do. The extra time to recover will allow both Mr. Stephens and me to perform at the highest levels, and, if I may be so bold, to crown a new World Heavyweight Champion. Thank you,” he says, “and we hope to see you at Genesis.” Fade to card

ATTENCION`. The rest of the matches now have markers, and some of the markers got shuffled to different matches. And now, I move out. Should be picking up a wireless card today so I'll be back online in no time. If not... well... uh... Good luck! *runs away*

PPV of the Year Award ---> Ramadomination ---> From the Fire ---> Clusterfuck The Mayor McCheese Comedic Moment of the Year Award ---> Straight bread. If that can be considered a "moment". If not, then the "Jimmy on the SWF Message Boards" promos. The Blazenwing Memorial Trophy - For 'Tool' of the Year ---> We haven't really had any outstanding tools this year... not that I can recall, anyway.

Can do.

Most markers have been edited in - however, I would like to avoid making any of our regulars (myself included ) pull triple duty, so I'm working on securing a few more. Those should be edited in by tomorrow night.

Yes, that poster is JJ's doing. I actually said no to it a while ago when he first showed it to me, but it kind of started growing on me. I really do like it. Markers will be edited in...... TONIGHT.

Also, please ignore the date on the poster. It's Monday the 18th.

Photobucket is down, so I can't put up the picture I MS Painted so wonderfully. Here's the gist of the set design: The roof will be open for the duration of the show. The ring will be where second base is. The rest of the outfield and infield will be taken up by floor seating, except for the two entrance ramps. The main Smarktron will be hanging down from the open roof you see in the picture. It will be oval-shaped, and it will cover most of that space. Faces will enter from the left corner of the outfield, heels from the right. Both sides will have complete sets and stages, with their own Smarktrons, ramps, pyro setups, etc., just like regular shows. The ramps will stand taller than usual, and will extend almost the entire way to the ring - walking down the ramp, you will be above the fans until just a few yards away from the ring. You can use whatever sort of "theme" or decor you want the sets to have. Go nuts.

-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- SWF GENESIS VII Live, Monday, September 18th, from the Rogers Centre at Skydome in Toronto, Canada! (7pm PST, 10pm EST; check local listings) (Send all promos/marked matches to chirs3) -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- SWF WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT/CRUISERWEIGHT CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH Michael Stephens © vs. Tom Flesher © They have a combined total of 20 titles won. They were both named Heel of the Year. They were both named World Champion of the Year. They were both named Wrestler of the Year. Both men have left their mark on the federation - both will be remembered as winners, as champions, and as legends... But after tonight, only one of them will be remembered as the best. This match will be fought under standard singles match rules. Send your match to janusd. -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- SWF INTERNATIONAL CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH - OLD SCHOOL RULES Bruce Blank © vs. "The Dean of Professional Wrestling" Jay Hawke After Bruce Blank won the International Championship Open Invitiational, Joseph Peters tried desperately to convert him into a man worthy of the belt. Whether or not he has succeeded is open for debate, but Blank must be doing something right, as over a month later he's still going strong. But that might be about to change. Bruce said a while ago that his International Title Reign would make people say "Jay Who?" But it seems like Jay Hawke has taken issue with that! The longest reigning International Champion in SWF History has clashed with Bruce on more that one occasion in recent weeks, and he managed to come out on top both times! And with Bruce's expertise being geared more towards the Hardcore end of the spectrum, Hawke's self-selected Pure Rules will only heighten the challenge for Blank to retain his title. Then again, Bruce is no stranger to record setting title reigns, and now that he's found a home in the International Division, odds are he will do anything to stay on top there. This match will be fought under Old School Rules. Two out of three falls, with a 60 minute time limit. Each wrestler has three rope breaks per fall. Throwing an opponent over the top rope is an immediate disqualification, and disqualifications and countouts WILL result in a title change! Send your match to Evolution. -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- GRUDGE MATCH Wildchild vs. Mike Van Siclen We already knew that Wildchild was a force to be reckoned with in the ring, but ever since Mike Van Siclen returned, we've seen a new side of this Bahaman - a side that excels at psychological warfare. Having driven MVS nearly to the brink of insanity (having pulled some pranks worthy of Midnight Carnival itself), these two will finally meet in the match Wildchild has been itching for - and the match Mike Van Siclen has been desperately trying to avoid! This match will be fought without countouts, and without disqualifications. Send your match to Longdogger_Pete. -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- CAGE MATCH Landon "La Cucaracha" Maddix © vs. "The Beast" Gabriel Drake Gabriel Drake has been an unsettling presence ever since his debut in the SWF. He has beaten everyone the bookers have thrown at him, and has his eyes set squarely on our World Champion. There is history there, but Landon Maddix doesn't care much for history, and he went out on a limb to get a match with Drake, in the hopes of shutting him down. Instead, he was jumped backstage, beaten into a bloody mess, and left as an example for all future opponents. Despite his partner's warnings, Maddix demanded this rematch, and JP was more than happy to oblige. More epicness to come... This match will be fought inside a 15 foot high steel cage. Bars, not the wussy fence kind. The first man to score a pinfall or submission, or to successfully escape the cage and plant both feet firmly on the ground, will be the winner. Send your match to Evolution. -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- FIRST BLOOD MATCH Johnny Dangerous vs. Charlie "Grappler" Matthews One of the all time SWF greats, Johnny Dangerous, made his return to the SWF last Smarkdown. He was set to compete against Main-Event Mainstay Tom Flesher, in what many predicted would be a Match of the Year candidate. But a combonation of Johnny's eagerness and Tom's lack thereof led to the match being called off, but not before Charlie Matthews got involved. Johnny's chance to upstage the #1 Contender was lost, and now he's out for blood. But with Tom engaged in the Main Event, Johnny will have to settle for someone else's blood: Charlie Matthews'. This match will be fought under First Blood rules - the first man to cause his opponent to bleed is the winner. The referee must see the blood in order to end the match. Send your match to chirs3. -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- SWF HARDCORE CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH Jimmy the Doom © vs. The Crimson Skull Where do I even begin? The short version would be that The Crimson Skull has kidnapped Lois the Unethical, and rather than call the police and let the authorities sort this thing out, Joseph Peters has convinced these two to settle it at Genesis, with the Hardcore Title on the line! Jimmy's no slouch in the hardcore department, but The Crimson Skull is a dastardly villain indeed, and is sure to have more tricks up his sleeve that simply dangling Lois above a shark tank. It's a race against time - for the life of a beautiful woma... well, a woman... and for the SWF Hardcore Championship! This match will be fought under... some very bizarre rules. Lois the Unethical will be suspended 100 feet above the ring - I'm sorry, I mean above the shark tank. Jimmy the Doom and The Crimson Skull will begin the match deep undergound, beneath the arena. In order to win the match, retain his title, and save the girl, Jimmy the Doom must reach the controls to free Lois before she is lowered into the shark tank (roughly one hour). If The Crimson Skull is able to stop him from reaching the controls, he will become the Hardcore Champion (and a murderer ). Send your match to Longdogger_Pete. -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- SWF CRUISERWEIGHT CHAMPIONSHIP #1 CONTENDERS MATCH "Hollywood" Spike Jenkins vs. "The Divine Wind" Akira Kaibatsu Two of the federation's top Cruiserweights clash for a shot at the title on AftershoxxxXXxxXXx! Both men will undoubtedly be bringing their A-Game for Genesis, but for these two, it's going to go well beyond this show! The winner of this match will face the winner of tonight's Main Event on AftershoxxXxXXx, for the Cruiserweight title! And THEN they'll be defending against The Unique Youth, Zyon, who won a shot at the title on Smarkdown! Tonight is not the end of their chase for Cruiserweight gold - befitting the name of Genesis, tonight, their journey begins. This match will be fought under standard singles match rules, with the Cruiserweight addenda: it is illegal to throw your opponent over the top rope, and the count on the outside is extended to 20. Send your match to chirs3. -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- MYSTERY MATCH "Deathwish" Danny Williams vs. ??? When people issue open challenges, we pay attention. When DANNY FREAKIN' WILLIAMS issues an open challenge, the line of competitors wanting to accept usually wraps around whatever arena we're in. Twice. Danny's invitation for Genesis 7 was accepted immediately, but his opponent has yet to reveal him or her-self publically! We're not even sure Danny himself knows! This match will be fought under standard singles match rules. Send your match to Ace309. -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- FATAL FOURWAY ELIMINATION MATCH The Scion of Light vs. Scotty "The Crush" Raina vs. MANSON vs. Scott Rageheart Two newcomers make their debut - what better time than Genesis? There will be no Ced Ordonez's or Martin Hunt's to boost their ego. The Scion of Light and Scott "The Crush" Raina will compete against each other in their debut match, but not ONLY against each other! Two SWF veterans, who have fallen on hard times in recent weeks, will get to play welcoming committee, and try to turn their luck around. Will one of our newbies steal the show, and the Genesis spotlight? This match will be fought under Elimination Rules, with two persons in the ring at any given moment. The other two will stand in their respective corners, and can be tagged in or out at any time. Eliminations can occur via pinfall, countout, submission, or disqualification. Send your match to Divefire. -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- TWO OUT OF THREE FALLS MATCH "The Unique Youth" Zyon vs. JJ Johnson Two long-time rivals will clash one final time, on the biggest stage of them all. Their history stands at 4-3, in favor of the Unique Youth, who definitely has a momentum boost coming into this match, having just defeated The Birdman in singles competition! JJ's recent exploits have been far less noteworthy, and some are beginning to question whether or not he's still got "it". What better time and place to find out than Genesis? This match will be fought to two out of three falls, with a 30 minute time limit. Send your match to Ace309. -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- SWF FROST PRE-PPV SHOW SINGLES MATCH Ian vs. Larkin Special Guest Referee: THE BOSTON STRANGLER~! Very few people in the SWF can claim to be undefeated. There's ELK... There's Mr. Galatea (all his losses were still moral victories)... And then, there's Ian. A few years back, for one night only, Longdogger Pete's son Ian competed in the SWF, and in an upset on par with Ash Ketchum defeating Chris Raynor in the G2 Tournament (JUMPING MEW DRIVAAAAAAH), the pint-sized wunderkind took down none other than The Boston Strangler. Since then, Ian has been pressed on numerous occasions to defend his undefeated streak, but the time and place were never right - that is, until Joseph Peters offered him Genesis. Thrilled with the idea of making his grand return at G7, Ian readily accepted the challenge - but the odds are not in his favor. First, his opponent - Larkin. Akira Kaibatsu's little sister. Same number of syllables as Ian, but twice as many letters - a clear advantage. No one has ever seen her wrestle and live to tell about it. Mainly because no one has ever seen her wrestle at all, but that will make her all the more difficult to predict. And under the tutelage of The Divine Wind... there's no telling what kind of fight she'll be bringing to the match. Second - never content to leave well enough alone (and also attempting to fill the retiree appearances quota for Genesis), Peters tracked down The Boston Strangler, and offered him a one night gig as the special referee! Has TBS made peace with his loss, or will he take every opportunity he can to hold the man (er, boy) down? This match will be fought under standard singles match rules. Send your match to chirs3.

Show's finally up. Cranking out descriptions for the Card. Should be up within the hour.

"Ladies and gentlemen, THIS is your main event of SWF Smarkdown! Scheduled for one fall, it is for the SWF WOOORLD Tag Team Championships!" "Alright!" chirps King, surprisingly upbeat at the prospect of a Stephens/Maddix match. TEN NINE "And the countdown is on." "The countdown to the total annihilation of those Two Skinny White Guys!" cheers King, announcing just why he's so upbeat. FOUR THREE Cut to the crowd and to a conveniently placed "HEY BUSH, BLAIR, WE FOUND THEM!" sign in the front row... TWO ONE ZERO A huge mushroom cloud of smoke plumes up over the entrance way as the countdown concludes and when the dust clears, the intimidating frames of the challengers appear. On the left, Bruce Blank is first to move, swaggering down the ramp with his brother Wayne cheering him on. Beside him is probably the biggest man in SWF history, Nemesis, flanked by Professor William Attenborough. "Introducing first tonight, the challengers! Being accompanied to the ring by Professor William Attenborough and Wayne Blank... at a total combined weight of seven hundred, five pounds... the team of "THE HAND OF THE GODS", NEMESIS and the SWF International Champion, "THE REDNECK SUPERMAN" BRUCE BLANK... they are THE WEAPONS OF MASS DESSSSSSTTRRRRRUUUUCCTTIIIIOOOOOONN!!!!" "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" The monstrous duo make their respective ways into the ring, Bruce confidently winding up his Lariating arm as his masked partner clambers in over the top rope. Towering over everybody, including his six foot eight teammate, Nemesis is given some last minute instructions from Attenborough, who has apparently transformed his life to become an expert on the finer arts of professional wrestling. Good for him. "Yikes," is all Mak can seem to muster, looking up into the ring. "What's that cute little rhyme Mak, 'bring your daughter to the slaughter'? Well, I don't know if Landon's momma drove him here tonight or not, but after what happened on Lockdown and what Bruce and Nemesis are going to do tonight, he'd best keep his VIP pass in hand when he leaves, because she certainly won't recognise him." "A burn and casting aspersions over Landon's gender. You're on fire tonight, King." "I'm excited!" says King, excitedly. "Tonight's gonna be the night! Maddix at 100% is barely worth mention and he's far from that due to Gabriel Drake. Which leaves Michael Stephens to carry the load against two huge, dominating competitors. And so close to Genesis VII too. Oh, it's too glorious Mak. The flippy-floppy cruisers of this place are FINALLY getting their comeuppance from the monster brigade!" "You've counted Stephens and Maddix out before King and usually, you've been wrong. The odds on paper may be stacked, but I guarantee you, tonight the 'Guys will be intent on proving they are indeed men." "Uh-huh, that's my shit All you girls stomp your feet like this 'Few times I've been around that track But it's not just gonna happen like that Cause there ain't no hollaback girl, there ain't no hollaback girl!" "You were saying?" "Oh sweet Jesus." As the undoubtedly bumping beats of "Hollaback Girl" by Gwen Stefani pump through the Ivor Wynne Stadium's P.A system, the crowd aren't sure whether to laugh, cheer or reach up through their noses and tug their brains from their head with their bare hands, then stomp on it a little before finally devouring it and dying. Luckily for profits, they choose a mixture of 1 and 2, as the Champions emerge. Landon is still showing signs of the beating he took five days ago, his forehead bandaged up for precaution as much as anything. But still he finds time to mug for the crowd, Megan applauding in the background. Storming past are the Stephens siblings, Mike looking about ready to commit harikiri at being forced to enter to this song while Amy just chugs on her beer. "And their opponents, accompanied by Amy Stephens and Megan Skye. Weighing in at a total combined weight of four hundred and forty two pounds... they are the reigning and defending SWF WORLD Tag Team Champions. The team of LANDON "LA CUCARACHA" MADDIX and the SWF World Heavyweight Champion, MICHAEL STEPHENS... THHHEEEEEE GGAAAALLAAACCTTIIIIICCOOOOOOOSSSS!!!" "YYEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!" "Well, a new team name for Stephens and Maddix." "Eh, they'll always be little more than Two Skinny White Guys to me, Mak." "That said, the Champions come in tonight with a huge weight disadvantage, a huge height disadvantage and with Landon Maddix not in top condition. With Michael Stephens' mind all over the place right now, there may be no better time for The WoMD to receive a shot at the tag straps." Teeth gritted and his eyes rolling, Stephens rolls into the ring and pops up to find Blank and Nemesis standing over him. Wisely Mike backs away and calls referee Hardcastle in to keep the opponents back until the bell goes. Stephens then turns to Maddix and yells at him to hurry up, mostly because the music is driving him frikkin' nuts. But apparently Landon is quite digging it, even playing air trombone as he climbs the steps. "It's a pity they found another team-name," muses King, "I've come up with the perfect one. Queer Eye For The Queer Guy." "That's cute." Landon takes one look into the ring and decides against his usual entrance, retreating back down the steps and staying on the outside of the ring to converse with Megan. Understandably, Stephens doesn't like this. But Landon points out the bandage on his forehead, giving him a good excuse not to start against either of the big bad opposition. To be fair, Stephens knows he's right. Which makes the fact he's distracted and therefore jumped from behind by Bruce Blank all the more frustrating. "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" "Bruce, before the bell!" groans Mak. "Always one to take the cheap route when possible and no different tonight!" *DING-DING-DING!* With typical ruthlessness Bruce keeps on clubbing with the forearms as Nemesis is pointed to his corner by Hardcastle, already in danger of losing control as Bruce lays on a blatant choke! "ONE!" "TWO!" "THR..." Bruce breaks the choke...but clamps it right back on as soon as the count is broken! "ONE!" "TWO!" "THRE..." Another break from the International Champion, something which he would consider clean wrestling. He now brings Stephens up to his feet and with a snarl on his face, the roughneck Redneck Superman grabs at Stephens' customised England soccer (it's football, damnit!) shirt, TEARING it to shreds to the dismay of the two girls in heavy eyeliner in the front row. "Those bints won't be fighting over the shirt this week," smiles King. Now shirtless, Stephens tries to create some distance for himself as he kicks out at Blank, rolling backwards and to his feet, at which point he explodes into life. Stephens pounces forward, leaping into Bruce's arms and peppering him with right hands, which Bruce sees as an annoyance, shoving Stephens away in frustration. Stephens comes right back at his burly opponent though, still swinging and managing to not look too out of his depth. At least, until Bruce shoves him off again, sending him plummeting to the canvas. Wisely the World Champion realises he can't keep the upperhand for long with this tactic and as he gets to his feet, he plays a little cat and mouse. His pause prompts Bruce to lunge on the attack. Stephens rolls under his sprawling arms though, through to a charge to the ropes. Around lumbers Blank, already pissed at the cruiserweight tendencies of his opponent, even before Stephens fires out at his knee with a patented soccer tackle! "This is what Stephens and Maddix have to do tonight," Mak calls, "they have to use their speed and agility to out-fox their larger opponents." Bruce's right leg shoots out from underneath him and he only just plants his hands in time to avoid faceplanting into the canvas. However, he might have been better going down because as he stands Stephens kips up right next to him, springing up and firing a big enziguri into the back of Bruce's head! "YYEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!" "Kip-up Enziguri! There's some agility, from the man who could be the next Cruiserweight Champion at Genesis VII!" cheers Mak, drawing a low growl from his announce partner. Fired up, Mike goes with what's working and hits the ropes again. Bruce is still up on his feet and shakes off the kick as Stephens skids across the canvas with another soccer tackle... ...but Bruce is able to thwart that attempt, lifting his leg over the sliding Sensation and as he comes to a stop, down comes the foot, stomping Stephens right in the base of the spine! "Ha! They don't have that in soccer!" cheers King, clapping his hands with childish glee. "You've never been to England, have you?" Smiling away, Bruce grabs hold of Mike's blue-black hair and with his typical disdain for cruiserweight athletes he just tosses him face-first into the WoMD corner. Stephens ends up slumped in the corner, and things are only going to get worse as Bruce gladly extends a hand and allows his partner to tag in. "Oh boy, here we go!" King cheers. "Nemesis in with the World Champion, boasting a foot and four inch height advantage and almost TWO hundreds pounds in weight!" Coming in over the top rope, Nemesis wastes no time in displaying his amazing power by lifting Stephens from a seated position and to his feet in one, clean movement. Pressing him against the turnbuckles, lifting his hand overhead and bringing it CLUBBING down across the chest of Stephens! That quickly, Stephens is right back down on his ass in the corner; he doesn't stay there for long though, as again he's hauled up by Nemesis and again, The Hand Of God comes crashing down upon him! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" "YEAH!" Bruce crows. "HOW'DYA LIKE THAT, PURTY BOY?" The answer to that would be "no sir, I don't like that much at all", although maybe not in so many words, Stephens already feeling it from the heavy-handed strikes. Grabbing some hair Nemesis brings Stephens back up again and the size difference now becomes completely apparent as The Colossus reaches down, scooping the World Champion up over his shoulders and simply pressing him down with a slam! A simple move, but evidently effective, Stephens nursing the 7'4" fall as he starts to crawl across the ring in search of the tag. Nemesis puts a stop to that in a hurry though, pinning Stephens down by treading on his trailing ankle, then leaving the mat to deliver an elbow drop to the spine... ...but despite barely making it into the air, he still comes down slowly enough for Stephens to roll to safety! "YYEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!" "Again, the speed advantage coming into play," Mak points out. Stephens is back to his feet, but it's nowhere near as nimbly as earlier and he's immediately forced to stretch out his back, feeling it from the big slam. Nemesis looks angry more than anything as he rises and stalks after The Sensation. Not one to back down from a fight, Stephens is waiting on him, firing off a kick to the gut. That barely shakes the monster, so Stephens tries again, before adding in a more karate-esque thrust kick. Nemesis is still yet to double over and understandably, that isn't filling Michael Stephens with a whole lot of confidence right now. Stephens opts for a different mode of attack this time and shoots for the legs, attempting a takedown reminiscent of one Tom Flesher. Only, his usually work. Arms wrapped around the legs, Stephens pushes and pulls but he makes absolutely no progress. And Nemesis eventually puts Stephens out of his misery, bringing The Hand Of God down across Stephens' spine! "The Hand Of God, a touchy subject with Englishmen." "Nevermind that," snaps King, "point out the fact that that was embarrassingly bad amateur wrestling from our World Champion! He's going to get schooled at Genesis, that's a prime example of why." "To be fair, Tom Flesher isn't seven foot four, four hundred ten pounds." Hooking up the arm, Nemesis now takes his time in pulling the World Champ up. Maddix is watching on intently but as the masked man glares in his direction he magically spots someone in the crowd he recognises, conveniently allowing him to avoid eye contact with the monster. But Nemesis can smell the fear. Still with Stephens, Nemesis takes a sidestep and beils him up into the air for a giant hiptoss... ...only for Stephens to flip through, landing on his feet! Stephens jumps, landing a dropkick...which doesn't put Nemesis down, but does buy Stephens time to tag out to Landon. "YYEEEEEAAAAAHHHHHH!" "And a cheer for Landon Maddix!?" Mak says, almost tripping over his words in disbelief. "Well, it IS Canada." As Landon steps into the ring, his partner begins to leave and seek a well earned breather. But Landon doesn't much fancy taking on the 7 foot plusser on his own and pulls Stephens back in by the arm, calling for a double team. Stephens sighs but shrugs his shoulder in acceptance. If he thought the double-team involved Landon hopping to the middle rope, then sitting himself on his shoulders, he might have said no. "Oh, wait a minute...so much for the height advantage!" "You've got to be kidding me..." groans King. "Hey, it works in Scooby Doo." A ridiculous sight indeed, Landon has come up with a 'cunning' plan to combat the size difference. On Michael's shoulders, he hovers a good few feet above Nemesis. Even so, Stephens protests from underneath him but Landon points forward and yells at Stephens to walk towards Nemesis, who has turned around. And even he has to stop and look confused for a moment. And that confusion allows Stephens time to waddle within striking distance, allowing Landon to do that, firing off a forearm to the face! "HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" "Oh, come ON!" King groans once more. Bruce and Wayne are going nuts on the floor, protesting at how unfair this all is, as Landon fires another forearm down from his perch to the top of Nemesis' head. The fact he's carrying 220 pounds does Stephens' back no further favours though and he shouts up at his partner to quit fooling around. But in that time, Nemesis has shaken off the blows and comes back on the attack, landing a Big Boot on Stephens... *WHAM!* ...which causes him to drop Landon with an Electric Chair! "OOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" "Another brilliant idea from the mind of Maddix." sneers King. Having seen enough wackiness from (one of) the Tag Champions, Bruce now comes in and pitches Michael Stephens to the floor. Meanwhile, his partner has hold of Landon and ignores his pleas for mercy, lifting him under the armpits and hoisting him high into the air, over with a hard thud into a neutral set of turnbuckles! On orders from Attenborough, Nemesis steps aside as Bruce comes charging, CRUSHING Landon in the corner with an Avalanche. Wringing the arm, Bruce then sends Landon back into his partner's direction with an irish whip, Nemesis lifting up a boot and simply allowing Maddix to run face-first into it, almost flipping him inside out! "I'm not sure how many stitches or even what type of stitches Landon has," begins Mak, "but whatever treatment he did get after Lockdown, he can't take too many of them before that cut becomes re-opened." "And believe me, with Bruce in the ring, that will be exactly the challengers' intention." King smiles. "You know how sadistic he is. Sure, he's the International Champion now, a fine old school competitor, but deep down that meanstreak is still boiling over inside." Bruce retreats to his corner to get Hardcastle off of his back, but it's only in order to accept a legal tag from Nemesis. Stepping in with a swagger in his step, Bruce stalks around the fallen Cucaracha, waiting for him to look back up...before SLUGGING him right in the head, putting him flat on his face! "OOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" "No technical prowess there," calls Mak, "that's just a right hand aimed right at that cut!" Landon is in a bad way. And Bruce knows it, giving the World Champion a touch of the badmouth before nonchalantly swinging his leg out, dropping it across the back of Landon’s head! Landon's body jerks up from the force, causing Stephens to wince from the TSWG corner. "WHITEEEEEEEEE TRASH!" "WHITEEEEEEEEE TRASH!" "WHITEEEEEEEEE TRASH!" "Now, who is it that calls themselves Two Skinny White Guys?" King protests, as the crowd turn volatile. "Pretty much just Landon. But that doesn't mean he's trash." "I beg to differ." All too used to the chants, Blank doesn't seem too concerned, as he drops another big legdrop across the neck of Maddix. Nonchalantly, Bruce then tips Maddix onto his back, leaning on top with a casual cover... ONE! TWO! No! “They call Landon ‘The Cockroach’ for a reason,” Mak exclaims, “he’s very hard to kill, but Bruce and Nemesis are on the right lines!” “Thank God.” God probably isn’t taking responsibility for Bruce’s actions but the Redneck Superman hauls Landon up again and hoists him over his head, then with a malicious grin on his face he starts pressing his cruiserweight opponent. The crowd decline to count along, and after realising that no-one’s joining in the fun Bruce’s face takes on a sulky cast at number eight and he just drops Landon behind him. Then he rolls Maddix over with his boot and makes a cover by standing on the former World Champion’s chest… ONE! TWO!! …but Landon kicks out! “Come on,” Mak snorts, “you’re going to need a better cover than that to keep Maddix down; annoying and immature he most certainly is, but he’d have to pretty much be out cold for that to work.” “Good point,” King agrees, “Bruce! Hit the spotmonkey in the head!” It’s unclear whether Bruce heard the Gambling Man, but he seems fairly eager to comply anyway and hauls Landon up off the mat again. He then reaches out one hand and gets a tag from Nemesis (not difficult, considering their combined reach they can tag from pretty much the centre of the ring), then fires Landon off the ropes. The dazed Maddix is unable to take much evasive action and he runs headfirst into a Blank roadblock as the International Champion hoists his opponent up, then slams him down with a spinebuster… “BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” …just in time for Nemesis to land an elbowdrop! “Hah! Maddix was too dumb to move!” King gloats. “Well, Bruce did have hold of his legs,” Mak points out. “Picky, Francis, picky.” Nemesis makes a cover, although it mainly consists of sprawling across Maddix and waiting for Hardcastle to make the count… ONE! TWO!! THR- -but Landon kicks out! A low, rumbling growl emanates from somewhere under the monster’s mask and he grabs Maddix with the clawhold and brings him to his feet. Maddix woozily tries to take a couple of swings at the big man but Nemesis is holding him well out of reach and extends his other arm towards Bruce, back in the WoMD corner. The Redneck Superman responds and tags back in, prompting Nemesis to whip Landon into the ropes before standing next to his partner and raising their feet simultaneously to greet the onrushing Maddix with a stereo big boot! “BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” Nemesis unhurriedly steps over the top rope to the outside and Bruce drops to make the cover… ONE! TWO!! THHHHHHHHHHRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR- -broken up by a basement dropkick from Michael Stephens! “YEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!” “Get him out of there!” King roars as Hardcastle gets up to do just that. Bruce looks up and glowers at Stephens, who flips the big man a v-sign as he exits the ring. This doesn’t worry the bigger Blank brother though, and he takes hold of Landon to pull the battered La Cucaracha upright once more. Once standing, albeit with Maddix sagging in his grasp, Bruce draws one thumb conspicuously across his throat to signal for ‘the end’ and hooks Maddix up as if for a vertical suplex. Bruce easily lifts Landon up for the Blank Bomb before shoving him off forwards for the sitout powerbomb… …and as he starts to fall Landon wraps his legs around Bruce’s head and jerks backwards to take the International Champion over with a Hurri-Lanrana! “YEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!” “LET’S GO LAN-DON!” “LET’S GO LAN-DON!” “That’s some brilliant innovation by Landon!” Mak Francis exclaims, “but can he capitalise?” “No more than he can punctuate!” King fires back. “…OK, how long have you been waiting to use that one?” Landon’s inventive counter certainly took Bruce off-guard, but the Tag Champion isn’t able to get up quickly to get to the corner where Michael Stephens awaits. Instead Landon gets up to one knee and grabs the ropes to steady himself while he shakes his head, looking to clear it. Bruce gets up and heads for Landon, Maddix straightens then ducks under a swinging right hook, turns to face his opponent… “Argh!” …and both men simultaneously gouge their opponent in the eyes! “Never has the phrase ‘an eye for an eye’ been more true,” Mak opines. “That’s weak, Francis.” Landon staggers away, swiping at his eyes; Bruce does so as well, and as it clears he sees Michael Stephens looking at him from the apron. With a cunning plan suddenly springing to mind Blank accelerates forward, taking the World Champion by surprise and slamming into him with a running forearm that knocks him clean to the stadium floor! “BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” Meanwhile Landon has found himself facing Nemesis, never a pleasant sight at the best of times. Maddix turns away from the WoMD corner, sees Bruce coming for him and rolls under the big man’s attempted lariat before rushing for his own corner… only to see his tag team partner lying on the floor with Amy Stephens trying to haul him upright! “Look out!” Megan shrieks, causing Landon to duck and roll to one side just as Bruce Blank thunders up behind him; the International Champion’s avalanche attempt fails and he crashes chest-first into the corner, missing Landon yet again. Maddix sees his chance and takes Blank over with a schoolboy, then places both his feet on the second rope… ONE! TWO!! TH- -but Bruce kicks out! Maddix grabs the rising Bruce with a cravate which prompts the crowd to groan in unison, but Landon quickly transitions into a position where he can kick Bruce repeatedly in the head as hard as he can! *SMACK!* *SMACK!* *SMACK!* *SMACK!* *SMACK!* *SMACK!* *SMACK!* *SMACK!* *SMACK!* The crowd roar their approval at this side of Landon’s game and the Next Generation grins, then as Blank slumps to one knee Landon slaps his own right knee, turns and runs for the ropes… …and Nemesis lifts a long, long leg to kick Landon in the back as he hits the cables. Maddix staggers forward and drops to one knee himself, clutching his back, and Bruce gets up. The big man shakes his head to clear the cobwebs, focuses on Landon in a vulnerable position in front of him and lumbers forwards. It’s not clear exactly how he plans to do it, but what is apparent is that he’s intent on causing pain. Therefore, it’s just as well that Landon manages to overcome the pain he’s already in to rise back to his feet and leap up to catch the onrushing Bruce with a Dropsault! “YEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!” Maddix lands hard and it’s clear that he’s jarred something, or maybe knocked the wind out of himself. Regardless, he looks towards his corner and sees the incredibly welcome sight of Michael Stephens standing there, the straight-edger looking slightly woozy still but back on his feet and wanting into the match. Maddix starts crawling… …Bruce grabs at Landon’s foot to try and stop him, but misses… …and Maddix makes the tag! “YEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!” Michael Stephens vaults over the top rope, ready to exact some revenge; however, Professor Attenborough has realised that Bruce won’t be able to get back to the WoMD corner in time and directs Nemesis to cut Stephens off! The monster obediently steps over the top rope and raises a big (VERY big) boot to catch Mike in the face; unluckily for him the Sensation ducks clean under it (not much ducking required, if we’re honest), then runs up the turnbuckles in the WoMD corner and leaps off backwards. Nemesis turns to try and get a bead on his opponent, but is simply blasted in the chest by the Corkscrew Dropkick… …and doesn’t go down! “What!?” Mak yelps, “that took Nemesis square in the chest! It staggered him, but the monster is still on his feet!” However, Michael Stephens has other things on his mind; Bruce has got up, and in order to stop him from making a contribution to proceedings the World Champion is obliged to blast him in the head with a superkick. *SMACK!* Bruce is knocked back into the ropes and Stephens returns his attention to Nemesis, only to have the monster’s enormous arm snake out and fingers like bananas clamp around his head in the Claw! Stephens tries to reach the big man, but this proves to be a costly move as instead of keeping his opponent out of reach Nemesis actively draws Mike in, straight into a massive knee to the gut! The breath is blasted from the World Champion’s lungs but Stephens has just enough energy left to slam his foot down hard on Nemesis’ toes, causing the monster to grunt in pain, limp backwards and release the Claw. “Hey! Ugly!” Nemesis falls victim to the ‘you know your name then’ school of humour as he turns towards the source of the sound, which turns out to be Landon Maddix perched on the second buckle. Nemesis pauses for a moment, seemingly confused, and in that moment Landon leaps off with a spinning gamengiri… at exactly the same time as Stephens slides into the back of Nemesis’ legs with a soccer tackle! *THUMP!* “LET’S GO STE-PHENS!” “LET’S GO LAN-DON!” “He’s down! He’s finally down!” Mak shouts as Nemesis topples backwards and the crowd start up warring but appreciative chants for the two Galacticos. Professor Attenborough is having an apoplexy on the outside, while Wayne Blank is having something similar but with few syllables. “Get him out of the ring!” King roars, “make your five-count, Hardcastle!” “On who?” the Franchise demands, “Nemesis has been in there longer than Maddix!” “No-one asked you!” Sexton Hardcastle realises he’s virtually lost control of this match, but he doesn’t fancy trying to restore order at the moment with two massive monsters and two fired-up Galacticos in the ring, and settles for cowering in a corner and trying not to get hit. Meanwhile, Bruce Blank has got up again and, realising that with both Stephens and Maddix in the ring he’s not going to have the chance for anything fancy, uses the element of surprise to grab Landon and pitch the Cockroach out of the ring (between the top and middle ropes - see, Bruce pays attention in Clusterfucks, and knows about Landon’s cat-skinning abilities). Stephens kicks him in the gut and grabs a front facelock, presumably setting up for the Unfinished Business, but we’ll never know as Bruce wraps his arms around the straight-edger and hoists him off his feet, then drives forward to ram Stephens into a neutral corner! Nemesis is starting to get up now and Megan Skye hops up to the apron to protest to Hardcastle about his presence in the ring. Figuring that a blonde chick is easier to remove than a masked monster Sexton demands that she get down… and as his attention is distracted Landon, who didn’t land that hard on the outside, climbs to the top rope while Amy Stephens actually stirs herself and throws him a chair! “Look out-” Mak begins, but doesn’t get to finish it. Megan Skye grabs Sexton Hardcastle and applies the ol’ Figure-Four Liplock… and with the referee well and truly distracted, Landon comes off the top rope with a MASSIVE chairshot to Nemesis! *KER-RACK!* “YEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!” “You cheating-” King roars before his mic is muted by the production truck. Nemesis drops and rolls out of the ring, partially from momentum and partly to presumably avoid further pain. Landon throws the chair out after him to avoid Hardcastle catching on, then turns his attention to Stephens and Blank. Bruce has his back to Landon and has hoisted Mike up over his shoulder for the Broken Dreams; just as he starts to run forward Maddix reaches up and grabs his partner’s legs, hauling Mike down off the International Champion and bringing Bruce up short with a puzzled expression on his face. He turns around and receives a double kick to the gut, then Stephens and Maddix turn around and each grab a ¾ headlock. They look at each other and nod. Then run forwards, towing Blank with them, running up the nearest set of turnbuckles and flipping backwards to drive the back of their opponent’s head into the canvas with Laberinto’s Sunny Revenge In England! *WHAM!* Megan has released Sexton; Mike makes the cover; Amy sits back down and swigs beer; Hardcastle drops to count, and Maddix stamps on Nemesis’ fingers as the monster tries to use the ring to pull himself up… ONE! TWO!! THHHHHHHHRRRRRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!! *DING-DING-DING!* “Ladies and gentlemen, here are your winners,” Funyon booms over the crowd roar, “and STILL~ SWF Tag Team Champions… THA GAAAAAAAAAA-LACTICOOOOOSSSSS!!” “They cheated! Damnit Francis, they cheated more than Bruce and Nemesis!” King yells. “Maddix cheated,” Mak points out, “well, and Megan and Amy; Mike didn’t do a thing wrong. I’m not saying it’s right King, but it worked.” “Just you wait!” King yells, “just wait ‘til Genesis, Toxxic! Tom’s gonna take your belt!” Michael Stephens doesn’t look unduly concerned. He slaps hands with Landon Maddix and the last shot is of the two men turning to leave the ring as we FADE OUT

And, backstage, SWF employees in the vicinity of Mike Van Siclen’s dressing room are suddenly startled by a loud burst of profanity: (BLEEP!)

Smarkdown returns with the House of Marvelous set ready to go in the middle of the ring. The luxurious suede couch and matching love seat have yet again been replaced, due to the unfortunate (for Sir Marvelous and Mike Van Siclen) turn of events at the end of last week’s episode of Lockdown. The one constant remains the arch, and the ever-present velvet rope. “It’s time for the next installment of the SWF’s newest hit,” says Mak Francis, “the House of Marvelous! And once again, King, we don’t have any idea who tonight’s guest is going to be!” “When I first heard the pitch for this, I though that it was going to flop for sure,” says the Suicide King. “But it’s been a ratings bonanza! It’s just too bad that the original contract was only for three episodes; hopefully Peters will realize that this thing is a cash cow and renew it after Genesis.” “Boy, you said it, King!” agrees Mak. “The Commissioner has GOT to keep this going after Genesis; the House of Marvelous is an excellent potential platform for our talent to introduce themselves to our fans! Let’s face it, King, you’ve got to have a lot of clout in this company in order to get that exclusive opening promo time, and if you’re not one of the Toxxic’s or Flesher’s or Maddix’s of the world, you could come up short… But with a show like the House of Marvelous, we now have a platform for ALL our talent to show whether or not they have the well-rounded game to take that next step as well!” With that, Notorious BIG’s “I Love the Dough” heralds the arrival of Michael Anderson, who limps out onto the stage, leaning heavily on his cane, and dressed in a black pinstriped suit. As always, Anderson is accompanied by the massive Tracey Bruner; the bodyguard is wearing a blood-red Armani, and a matching hat, his coal-black eyes obscured by sunglasses. “Who the hell wears sunglasses indoors?” jokes King. “And what’s with that suit? He looks like a 6’10” black Santa Claus!” “I tell you what, King,” laughs Mak, “why don’t YOU tell him that he looks like Santa Claus?” “No way!” replies King hastily. “YOU tell him; you’re ALREADY paralyzed!” “Ladies and gentlemen,” booms Funyon, “please welcome: Sir… Marvelous!” Marvelous’ ridiculously insincere smile threatens to crack his face in half, as he makes his way to the ring. He limps up the steel steps, and then waits on Bruner to get up to the apron and hold open the ropes for him before he enters the ring. Once inside, he then waits for Bruner to unhook the velvet rope before he passes through the arch and picks the microphone up from the stand as his music fades out. “Welcome,” drawls Anderson, “to the House of MAAAAARVELOUS! I am your host, Sir Marvelous, and once again, the House of Marvelous was the highest-rated segment of SWF programming last week, and for that, I thank each and every one of you!!” Some fans seemed pleased by this news and want to cheer, but to most others, it comes across as Anderson unnecessarily patting himself on the back, and they start booing. “My guest tonight has a few words to say about a match that you may have heard was just recently signed for Genesis…” YEAAAAAAAAAAH! “He also,” continues Anderson, “just recently revealed himself to be the alter ego of the Birdman…” YEAAAAAAAAAAH! “Aw no!” groans King. “Ladies and gentlemen,” finishes Marvelous, “please, show some love for… the Wildchild!” The fans begin to cheer wildly the lights cut out: RAAAAAAAAAAH! ATTENTION! ALL YOU NIGGAZ! ALL YOU BITCHES! TIME TO PUT DOWN THE CRISTAL, TIME TO TAKE OFF THE ICE FOR A MINUTE… TIME TO THROW A LITTLE MUD IN THIS MOTHERFUCKA… Hamilton erupts as Redman’s “Let’s Get Dirty” heralds the arrival of the Bahama Bomber! A solitary spotlight pierces the Ivor Wynne Stadium, flashing off and on in rhythmic time as the beat throbs melodiously. The cheers become even louder as the Bahama Bomber saunters out onto the stage, having changed completely out of the Birdman costume, and into street clothes. In his hand, he is holding a fairly thick collection of documents. “There he is!” shouts Mak. “One of the most anticipated returns of the year, as Wildchild officially comes back to the SWF. And King, you’ve got to believe that he’s got a lot to say!” WC makes his way down to the ring and somersaults between the bottom and middle ropes to enter the ring. He stands patiently in front of the velvet rope, and waits for Bruner to admit him before he takes his place besides Anderson. Wildchild looks out into the crowd as his music fades out, and the fans begin chanting for him: DUB-CEE! DUB-CEE! DUB-CEE! DUB-CEE! Marvelous holds the microphone patiently for WC to make his opening remarks, but the Bahama Bomber takes another moment to gather himself emotionally before leaning into the microphone and saying: “So… what’s new?” DUB-CEE! DUB-CEE! DUB-CEE! DUB-CEE! “Wildchild,” begins Marvelous, “Obviously, I already know the answer to my next question, but I’d be remiss if I didn’t get it on record: were you always the Birdman?” Wildchild looks at Anderson, and then looks out into the crowd before turning back towards the microphone to reply, “Oui!” “Alright then,” continues Marvelous. “And now for a question that I DON’T already know the answer to: why?” “Yeah,” cosigns King. “Cough it up, damn you! Why did you go through that charade for two years?” As if he hears King’s complaints, the Tropical Tumbler leans towards the microphone and answers, “It was about vengeance, pure an’ simple; I became de Birdman t’give myself a better chance t’get at Van Siclen… because he’s too much of a BITCH t’fight me face on!” YEAAAAAAAAAAH! “Okay Wildchild,” asks Marvelous, “and just what do you mean by that?” “Two years ago, Mike Van Siclen tried t’end my career,” explains Wildchild. “While I was recovering, I started to hear talk dat he was refusing t’fight me! He was goin’ around tellin’ people dat he wasn’ gon’ fight me because he didn’ have any’ting t’prove… Dat, as far as he was concerned, what he did t’me was in his past, an’ he wasn’ gon’ t’revisit his past for my benefit… An’ dat’s when I came up wit de idea t’come back under a disguise. “But den,” continues WC, “before I got a chance t’face him, he cheated me out of my revenge by leaving de SWF!” “Hey now,” admonishes Mak, “I think that Van Siclen is a twit as much as the next guy, but let’s be fair; he left the SWF because he lost a career match against Toxxic!” “And what’s with all these comebacks?” asks King idly. “Van Siclen is back after just two years, Dangerous is back after less than a year… what happened to when losing a career match meant that you kicked rocks and didn’t come back?” “So,” asks Anderson, “if you couldn’t convince Van Siclen to fight you, then how did you get him to change his mind?” “It took me a while before I figured out which buttons t’push wit’ him,” replies WC. “Like I said, I couldn’t get him t’fight me, an’ I didn’ have a belt dat I could use as bait… But, after weeks of studyin’ him, I finally figured out what makes him tick: Van Siclen has a bigger ego den any person ought t’have… He actually t’inks dat he’s God’s gift t’wrestlin’. I figured out dat de one t’ing dat he can’t stand is t’be publicly embarrassed, so I set about t’use de Birdman identity t’keep getting under his skin, until he finally snapped an’ gave me de match dat I’ve been wantin’ from him.” “And,” continues Marvelous, “I suppose it would be safe to say that it worked?” WC flashes his trademark grin. “You’re damned right it worked!” YEAAAAAAAAAAH! “I got dat sumbitch so spun up dat he didn’ know if he was comin’ or goin’!” continues Wildchild. “I got him so frustrated, so bent outta shape, so embarrassed an’ enraged, dat he was willin’ to do whatever it took t’get rid of me…” WC pauses to lift the handful of documents into the field of vision. “Even sign a contract dat he didn’ bother t’read!” YEAAAAAAAAAAH! “Dis contract means dat at Genesis, it’s gon’ be you an’ me, Van Siclen!” shouts the Caribbean Cruiser. “But, it’s not gon’ jus’ be any match… it’s gon’ be no countout, an’ no-DQ!” YEAAAAAAAAAAH! “You’re not gon’ be able t’duck me any more!” continues WC. “For de past two years, you’ve been livin’ on borrowed time, but at Genesis, Van Siclen… your time is UP!” With that, “Let’s Get Dirty” begins to play once more, as Wildchild salutes the crowd. “And there you have it, ladies and gentlemen!” shouts Francis. “Wildchild disguising himself as the Birdman was all part of a carefully-designed plot to lure Mike Van Siclen into a match at Genesis, and it’ll be Wildchild versus Van Siclen, with no countout, and no disqualification!” “Wildchild went to a hell of a lot of trouble to get this match made,” says King. “He’d better know what he’s just gotten himself into!” “We’ll be right back,” shouts Francis, “with more Smarkdown!” Wildchild climbs up onto the turnbuckles and salutes his fans… As we: FADE OUT

Mike Van Siclen storms into SWF Commissioner Joseph Peters’ office, a bright new welt across his forehead to match all of the bruises from being attacked by birds the previous week on Lockdown. He looks expectantly at Peters. “Well?” Peters rolls his eyes as he looks up from the paperwork he was perusing. “Well what, Michael?” “Well, what are you going to do about Wildchild?” demands Van Siclen. “You’re going to fire him, right?” “Fire him?” Peters asks with a smirk. “For what?” “For what?” MVS repeats incredulously. “What the (bleep) do you mean, ‘for what?’ You know what! Wildchild violated his suspension by wrestling as the Birdman. Now, you’ve got to fire him; rules are rules!” “Unfortunately,” replies Peters, “I’m not going to be able to do that… You see, as of last Wednesday, Wildchild’s suspension was lifted.” “What?” roars the Spectacle. “(Bleep)-ing why? Who the (bleep) would allow something that galacticly stupid to happen?” Peters breaks into a full-fledged grin as he stares back at Van Siclen. “You did.” “What?” “It was part of that contract you signed last week,” explains the commissioner. “What the (bleep) are you talking about?” asks MVS. “What (bleep)-ing contract?” “The contract you signed after your… uhm… incident during the House of Marvelous segment,” replies Peters. “You came in here and signed those contracts that Wildchild left with that note… unfortunately for you, you didn’t bother to actually read it.” “Meaning?’ “Meaning,” continues Peters, “that among other things, an affidavit signed by you, petitioning the SWF Board of Directors to repeal Wildchild’s suspension was forwarded up to them. And, since you’re the person responsible for his suspension in the first place, the Board determined that they would expedite the repealment.” “I don’t believe this.” Van Siclen shakes his head. “I don’t (bleep)-ing believe this. The whole (bleep)-ing world’s against me, I (bleep)-ing swear to God… Wait a minute; you said ‘among other things,’ Peters… WHAT (bleep)-ing other things?” “Oh,” replies Peters. "I think that you might want to get in front of a monitor here real soon…"

The door of the Commissioner's office opens, with a figure clad purely in white backing out. "Arigatou, arigatou!" she says, bowing her way out. She readjusts her gym bag over her shoulder and turns around. The masked woman known as the Scion of Light has finally signed her contract into the Smartmarks Wrestling Federation. She walks down the hallway, passing a man in a full bird costume. She raises her hand as if she's about to greet him, but he just walks on by. "... taihen." she mutters. Undaunted she continues towards the locker rooms. She turns a corner and nearly runs right into a big brick house of a wrestler, towering above her. "Go-gomen... ano... Sorry!" she blurts out. Bruce Blank merely grunts as he walks past. If her eyes were visible through her mask, they'd look like giant saucers after the run-in. She shakes her head and moves onwards. Ahead, a broad shouldered man in a blue warmup suit catches her attention. He spies her, and walks towards her, something glinting in his hands. Excited that she might finally find someone to say something to her, the Scion of Light quickens her pace. She raises her hand in a wave towards him. "Hello!" she says in a heavily accented fashion. Tom Flesher, still sweating from his previous outing walks up to meet the newcomer. "Hello. You're new aren't you?" asks the Cruiserweight Champion. "HAI!" she exclaims, "I am the Scion of Light!" To emphasize this, she strikes a Kamen pose, with one arm bent towards her head, and the other straight towards the sky. Her smile almost beams out from her mask. "Yes. Hello. Here, hold this," says Tom Flesher. He unceremoniously tosses the Cruiserweight Championship towards her. Momentarily stunned, it takes the Scion a split second to drop out of pose before clumsily catching the belt. Meanwhile Flesher has walked past her down the other end of the hall. "Ano... ano... Excuse me... Sir?" she asks, quickly following the man in the blue warmup suit.

DING DING DING!!! The sounding of the timekeeper’s bell draws all eyes to the center of the squared circle, where Funyon patiently waits. It takes a second to settle the crowd after being riled up from the end of commercial break, and after they quiet down enough for the ring announcer to deliver his introductions, he does just that. “Ladies and gentlemen,” he bellows. “The following match is the first of TWO main event matches and is scheduled for one fall! Introducing first…” Funyon’s voice drifts off into the open air of the Invor Wynne Stadium. For a second, the only sound heard is the small cracks and buzzes of excitement from the fans, and it only grows when the house lights give way to light up the Smarktron. On the screen the opening ‘fuse lighting’ scene from the Mission Impossible television series is shown as the theme from the same show comes blaring over the speakers! YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!! “Oh, they’re on their feet here! What an ovation for the return of Johnny Dangerous!” yells Mak. Johnny enters just as he did on Lockdown; rising through the stage on a platform. This time, however, smoke swirls all around the Barracuda while dozens of lights on each side of him strobe in time with the music. “From Las Vegas, Nevada, and weighing in at two hundred-twenty pounds,” the ring announcer bellows, trying his hardest to be heard over the ruckus from the music and fans. “He is…JOHNNY ‘THE BARRACUDA’ DANGEROUS!” Johnny pumps his fist for the crowd with the announcement of his name and then does an about face and heads down the ramp, towards the ring he thought he’d never want to see again. “Johnny Dangerous is coming off of a nine month absence from the SWF,” Francis reports like a true anchorman, “and after that lengthy of a hiatus the Barracuda will most likely have to shake off a little bit of rust tonight.” “A little bit!?” The Suicide King says in disbelief. “Hell, Johnny Dangerous is going to be rustier than a bucket of old nails! He wasn’t anything to write home to mom about to begin with, so you can just imagine how bad he’s going to stink up the joint – we might have to start calling him Pepe Le Peu!” “Oh, come on now, Brian.” “Seriously!” exclaims King. “And you can’t come into a match like this and expect to win when you’re trying to work the kinks out! Tom Flesher is by far the most gifted athlete in the SWF and probably the toughest opponent Johnny Dangerous has ever had to face through out his career! When you’re facing the toughest opponent you’ve ever dealt with you have to be at your best, and Johnny Dangerous will have to do that right out of the gates – there’s no cupcake opponent for him to iron out the wrinkles first.” “You might be right there,” agrees Francis, nodding his head. “However, as we saw earlier Tom Flesher has all his attention focused on beyond tonight, and I’m not to sure if he is in his finest form either. He’s certainly seen better days…especially around the waist line!” “Which is all part of the intricate plan for his World Title victory at Genesis,” argues King. “Tom Flesher knows what he is doing and he certainly knows how to handle a simple match against this rust bucket.” “We’ll see,” Mak says, shaking his head while the Barracuda enters the ring. He heads for a corner turnbuckle, climbs up, and pumps his fist as hundreds of flashbulbs pop from all sides of the stadium. With the way the fans have reacted to Johnny—welcoming him back into the fold with open arms--it’s hard for the Barracuda to not get caught up in the moment of his grand return from exile. However, his first challenge back is trying to beat a man he’s only beaten once, and that was when Flesher was the acting commissioner not an active member of the roster. If Johnny wants to win he knows that he’s going to have to focus on the task at hand, so when the Barracuda hops down from the turnbuckle his smile fades – it’s all about taking care of business now. “Is he going to wear those sunglasses the whole time?” Suicide King whispers to Mak Francis, but before he can respond the scratchy, nails-on-a-chalkboard voice of James Matheson comes over the speakers. “Tonight you're going to see the final tune-up match for the man who's adopted the Great White North as his home, and who you've so kindly adopted in return,” he bellows. “Ladies and gentlemen, children of all ages, give it up for the current SWF Cruiserweight Champion, for what that's worth, and the NEXT SWF Heavyweight Champion of the WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORLD.... TOM FLESHER!” And with that, a blue explosion lights up the Colisee Pepsi and “Kashmir” begins to rock out over the speakers. Tom Flesher steps through the curtain wearing his trademark warm-up suit (though it may be an extra large this time) and dragging the Cruiserweight Championship belt on the floor behind him. “Man,” mutters Mak. “The way Flesher carries that Cruiserweight Championship around you’d almost think he was forced at gun point to bring it with him.” “I wouldn’t put it past Peters in the slightest,” King adds. Flesher stops at the foot of the ring to strip down to his ring attire. He glances up at Johnny while unzipping his jacket and then shakes his head in pity, “-and apparently I’m not the only one who thinks this is a waste of Tom Flesher’s time,” the Gambling Man says. “Why is this match taking time away from the buffet table?” Francis asks. Flesher hands over his warm-up suit and Cruiserweight Championship, all wadded up in a ball, over to Matheson to store away then- *CRACK!* YEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAH!! -gets drilled in the back with a baseball slide and the fans roar in delight at the sight of Flesher getting hit with a cheap shot before the bell! “Whoa!” exclaims Mak as Flesher goes tumbling to the floor. “Evidently, the Barracuda has taken some exception to the way Tom Flesher just disrespected the Cruiserweight Championship, a belt that Johnny Dangerous once proudly held!” “So a cheap-shot before the bell is how a so called ‘Protector of the American Way’ goes about his business?!” Herrington admonishes Johnny for his actions but it goes in one ear and out the other as he quickly slides under the bottom rope and drops out of the ring, to the floor, hoping to get another drop on his opponent. Before he can get that next drop, though, Flesher is up on his knees and is able to sink a quick, stinging elbow into the Barracuda’s midsection, doubling the agent over on his way to his knees- *CRACK!* -and a final kick to the Barracuda’s forehead puts him on his back! Flesher, having already had enough of this crap and having more important things to save his strength for, motions for Matheson to leave. He waits for his manager to gather his belongings and then the two begin heading back up the ramp. “Wait a second now!” shouts Francis. “There is supposed to be a match starting! Why is Tom Flesher leaving!?” “Like he has time to waste on juvenile bullshit like this,” King replies. “If Johnny wants to jump someone he needs to go and join a street gang!” With a hand to his head, Johnny looks up and sees Flesher heading up the ramp, trying to walk out on this match like it meant nothing to him! It might not matter to Flesher, but with the crowd cheering for Johnny Dangerous and starting up chants of his name it certainly matters to him! He quickly scrambles to his feet and heads after Flesher, starting with a hobble and then moving towards a painful jog after him! “I don’t think Johnny’s going to let Flesher walk out on him like that,” the Franchise says as the Barracuda chases his man down. However, Johnny won’t get to Flesher today. As the Barracuda reaches the top of the stage he runs right into the chest of Charlie Matthews! “And I don’t think the Barracuda can do anything to stop him,” King finishes as the crowd fires off some heavy boos at Matthews. Charlie, without uttering a word, grabs the Barracuda by the back of his thick, jet-black hair and head-butts him! The blow causes Johnny to stagger back rather dazedly and he’s unable to offer up any fight against the big man as Charlie grabs him and heaves him off the side of the stage! “HOLY SHIT!” Mak exclaims, along with the crowd. Johnny goes tumbling end over end and lands on his back, on the concrete floor! “This isn’t how you make a triumphant return,” snickers King. “Fortunately, the drop wasn’t that high but I bet you Johnny thinks twice before going after Tom Flesher again.” Grappler makes a final bow before heading backstage, leaving the crowd to stare at their Secret Agent, face up on the floor… As We: FADE OUT.

Jimmy the Doom wends his way through the general mayhem that is the backstage area of a SWF show to the office of Joseph Peters. The Straight-Bread Sensation opens the door and walks through. Joe's secretary is about to stop him, but then realizes who it is. "Oh, right, Mister Peters scheduled you for an appointment. Go on through." Doom nods and enters to find The Crimson Skull sitting across from the SWF commissioner! Jimmy tenses up, but Peters, sensing the chance of fisticuffs occurring, acts fast and throws a small plastic rectangle, commonly used in grocery stores to seperate one person's items from another, between Jimmy and Skull. Doom glances at the uncrossable boundary, then to Peters, before finally fixing an icy glare on the beefy supervillain. "Okay, that should keep the physical expressions of hostility to a minimum," Joe says. "Well, gentlemen, you must have some idea as to why I called the both of you together." However, neither man is really paying any attention to Peters, instead opting to scowl at one another. "Lois the Unethical," Peters says, causing Doom's head to snap around on Joseph. "Skull, I believe you said you'd return her to Jimmy once your demands were met. What are they?" "Seeing as how this idiot was unsuccessful in winning the World title, I'm afraid I'll have to ask for the only thing he's got: the Hardcore belt," Skull says. "Assing of pieced, shitted, to with of your having, being on taked," Doom growls. "Whoa, whoa, whoa. That is not going to happen, Jimmy! I can't just have you giving the Hardcore title away to The Crimson Skull, regardless of the fact that he's got your wife held hostage. He hasn't even won a contendership match! Hell, the only title he's won has been as your tag team partner. No go on the straight swap. However, I suppose, with Genesis being right around the corner and all, that you two wouldn't object to a match for Lois and the belt. Besides, Jimmy, I did say I'd give you a shot at Skull at Genesis. Remember, when he first attacked you?" "Manied with bastardings!" Jimmy roars. "Of fighted, with a wifes, having to been mine, on a getting in severals near, to backed Skull, being against?!" "Hmm, I like how you think, Joseph. In fact, I might have the perfect idea for this match. That is if Jimmy is willing to accept the offer," Skull says. "Look, Jim, I know it seems heartless to make you win Lois back, seeing as how you'd rather have her than the belt, but think about things from my perspective. The biggest show of the year is in a week, and if you just give the belt to Skull, I'd have to scramble to get a contender so he can defend it on Genesis. However, if you agree to this match, there's a chance you can walk out of Genesis with not only your wife, but the Hardcore belt, too," Joe says. "Of course, there's an equal chance you could leave with neither, but isn't that a chance you'd be willing to take?" Morosely, Jimmy nods. "Good! That's very good. Now, Skull, about this match," Peters says. "Yes, well, I have to be honest, this isn't a spur of the moment idea. I'd originally thought this up to use against Cyclone Comet, once I found him, of course. By the way, you don't happen to know where he is, do you? It's just that, well, he's the only reason I came to the SWF, but, as you can tell, I've gotten a bit sidetracked. Anyway, I've got some sharks in a holding area that can be sent pretty much anywhere in the world in two day's time. I was going to just kill them, since they didn't take to the modifications that well, but Heff named them and everything, and Jesus, if I kill one of his companions, he sulks for about a month. So, we've got the sharks, and then, when it comes time for our match, Joe, you get your guys to take down the ring and put up a big water tank, and the sharks go in there. I'll put Lois in the rafters, about a hundred feet up, and when our match starts, she'll be lowered down to the tank. I figure Doom gets an hour to flip the switch that stops the motor, in which case, he retains the title and gets Lois. If he doesn't flip the switch in an hour, though, I get the belt, and Lois is in the tank, which, thankfully, will eliminate a problem I've had for the past few days. She just will not stop complaining. Of course, since there is no ring, the match can't start there, besides, that would make it a bit too easy for Jimmy. No, I'm thinking we start in a cellar, basement, boiler, or furnace room, whatever's available. Well, what do you guys think?" Skull asks. "Wow. Uh, other than Lois possibly going in the shark tank, I don't really see anything potentially wrong there," Joe says. "Jimmy, your thoughts?" "For if doned, to becoming Lois, with in for backs, mine having, it," Jimmy says and walks off. "I would have liked to get a handshake, or maybe a contract signing, but I guess verbal is fine," Joe mutters. And Smarkdown fades to plaid.

... OR NOT. The Unique Youth has just begun to leave the ring, leaving a wounded Birdman behind, when- CRASH! Mike Van Siclen suddenly runs down in from the crowd and into the ring, tackling Birdman to the canvas! “It’s Mike Van Siclen!” shouts Mak. "Now that Birdman's down, he's coming to finish him off!" Van Siclen continues to take advantage of Birdman’s condition, as he stomps heavily and repeatedly onto Birdman’s back! He then bends down to grab the back of Birdman’s mask, and begins to untie it! “Here we go!” shouts King. “Van Siclen’s had enough of the Birdman, and he’s going to find out who he is, once and for all!” MVS gets the mask nearly halfway untied, before Zyon heads over to come to the Birdman’s aid, pulling the Spectacle off of him, and standing between the two of them. “Thank you, Zyon,” says Mak, as Birdman rolls towards the apron. “Even if you think that Birdman ought to reveal himself, it shouldn’t happen like this!” Van Siclen glares disdainfully at Zyon and then turns to depart the ring… WHAM! … Only to suddenly spin back around and knock Zyon to the canvas with a ferocious sucker punch! “Wow, what a hit!” says King, as MVS pulls Zyon to his feet and leads him across the ring, before heaving him over the top rope. “I guess that Van Siclen’s not going to let anything come between him getting even with the Birdman!” Van Siclen turns his attention back to the Birdman, who has gotten back to his feet on the apron. He charges towards his would-be nemesis, but the Bird lunges between the ropes and drives a shoulder into this midsection, doubling him over, eye-level with the middle rope! “That’ll take the wind out of Van Siclen for a minute!” shouts Mak. “And let’s not forget, he just had a match, so he’s already worn out!” Birdman grabs onto the middle rope with both hands and braces his feet against the edge of the apron as he pulls back hard on the rope. Once he has it as far back as it will go, he releases it, falling down to the arena floor… WHACK! … As the vinyl-covered steel cable snaps back towards the ring, cracking Van Siclen in the forehead and sending him flying backwards onto the canvas! “Holy cow!” shrieks Mak. “What a shot! I think he knocked Van Siclen clean out!” “After the match he just had, it probably wouldn’t have taken much, anyway, but as you well know, those cables hurt more than a little bit!” Birdman climbs back onto the apron and quickly heads over towards the corner, leaping gracefully onto the top rope. He looks out into the crowd and gives them his signature cry: Birdman: CAW-CAW! Crowd: CAW-CAW! The fans cheer as Birdman leaps from the top rope and caves Van Siclen’s chest in with the Bird Dropping! Birdy then pops to his feet and then looks out into the crowd for a few moments, before reaching behind his head for the ties to his mask. “Aw, isn’t that nice,” says King sarcastically, as Birdy bends over at the waist. “He gets ambushed in the ring, and he still makes the time to keep his mask on straight!” “Wait a minute, King,” replies Mak, as Birdman appears to be pulling at the mask, “I’m not so sure that he’s straightening that mask… No… he’s taking it off!” Birdman keeps his head low as he pulls the mask completely off of his head, and then stands straight up… YEAAAAAAAAAAH! … Earning a MASSIVE pop from the crowd as the face of Dominic LeCroix is revealed! “IIIII KNEW IT!” cries King, rising out of his seat aghast. The fans begin loudly for the Bahama Bomber: DUB-CEE! DUB-CEE! DUB-CEE! DUB-CEE! The speakers in the arena suddenly come alive as, for the first time in a year, the chorus of Redman’s “Let’s Get Dirty” starts playing. “And there you have it,” shouts Mak, as WC throws his mask down onto Van Siclen’s head. “Weeks of speculation are over, as Wildchild has officially revealed himself to be the Birdman! And King, he had Mike Van Siclen sign a document last week that said he’d be out of his life for good; was this his parting shot? Have we seen the last of Wildchild in the SWF?” “Well, if not, he’s going to have to get a new disguise,” laments King. WC grabs onto the top rope and heaves himself out to the arena floor; he begins slapping hands with the fans at ringside as he makes his way back up the ramp… As we: FADE OUT

The SWF returns to the vivid Ivor Wynne Stadium that is currently illuminated by the costly lights that tower over the field. The tailgating has ended and inside the spacious arena would be a swarm of mad fans pumped for more SWF action. They have been teased by the taste of the SWF’s grand product, but they have yet to experience the breathtaking action that occurs between a Birdman and a former two time SWF Cruiserweight champion. However, that feeling of emptiness ends now… “LET’S GET RETARDED!!!” “Let’s Get Retarded” by the Black Eyed Peas sends the audience in a frenzy as the Suicide King and the Franchise Mak Francis welcomes the home viewers back from an eternity of commercials. “Next up, as you can tell from the pumping beats in the background, the Birdman is set to face off against Zyon in a rematch of the August 28th version of Smarkdown. In that match, Birdy bested the former Cruiserweight champion with a mirage of high risk maneuvers that weren’t really that high risk at all…” The Franchise finishes…or is forced to finish due to his partners impatience. “That’s all nice and good Mak, but really, why do I have to watch this match again. Yes the Birdman is a deranged individual who is capable of putting his body on the line, but chooses to go old school with axe hammer smashes and cross bodies. Zyon on the other hand, is a complete tool who has yet to pull anything together since getting schooled by Michael Stephens in a World Title match a few months back. And I’m sorry, but if you get schooled by Toxxic then there is certainly no hope for you.” The King of Hearts sounds off on the combatants. Dancing through the curtain receiving the same round of cheers he always gets, Birdman analyzes the stadium that enjoys his wacky antics and athletic approach to wrasslin’, and only has one thing to say to that… Birdman: CAW-CAW! Crowd: CAW-CAW! “The following contest is scheduled for one fall,” Funyon bellows out from the echo of birds that seemingly have flocked the stadium, “This match will be held under Cruiserweight Rules AND the winner is guaranteed a Cruiserweight title match after Genesis!!!” Funyon emphasizes the last part of his standard announcement before continuing his introduction of the bizarre guy in a costume, “Coming to the ring, hailing from parts unknown, and weighing in tonight at two hundred nineteen pounds. He is the BiiiiiiiirrrrrrddddddMAN!!!!” Funyon shrieks as everyone’s favorite bird dances his way into the ring, ascending the middle turnbuckle immediately, and we know what comes next. Birdman: CAW-CAW! Crowd: CAW-CAW! “Tell me again why these people like him,” King whines, “I mean he’s just some dolt in a bird costume. Better yet he could be Wildchild or Johnny Dangerous in a bird costume, which proves my point even more, which…” “Or it could be Jay Hawke, Akira Kaibatsu, Matt Myers, Chuck Norris, Vin Diesel, or some unknown kid looking to hit the big time. The possibilities are endless.” Mak cuts in on the King of Heart’s monologue. “Did you just interrupt me? I’ll pretend that you didn’t. And you wonder why you ended up in that chair.” Removing his cloth wings and handing them to the ring attendant, Birdy prances around the ring until his music fades into the darkness that elucidates once the Smarktron lights up… I’M BORN! I’M ALIVE!! I BREATHE!!! The sudden tone of “Vitamin” by Incubus busts through the unfathomable cheering that accompanies such a tune. And the cheering only gets stronger when the young man himself dashes out into the limelight! “YEAH!!!!” The crowd explodes as the Unique Youth salutes the Canadian province of Ontario as Funyon prepares another tremendous introduction for this particularly exciting athlete. “And his opponent, hailing from Elkhart, Indiana. Weighing in tonight at an even two hundred pounds. He is the Unique Youth, ZYYYYYYYON!!!” Funyon exits the ring as the youth sprints down the ramp way, energetically sliding into the ring where his opponent watches on. Leaping to the second turnbuckle, Zyon looks back at the man that defeated him less that two weeks ago, and tosses his arms up in an arrogant taunt that establishes that he still believes he is a key player in the Cruiserweight division. Of course, King would think differently, “Ok, this guy just sucks. When was the last time he won a match? Hell, when was the last time he was booked this frequently? Even Joseph Peters has lost faith in this no talent wannabe.” “Actually King, Zyon still maintains a decent win/loss record. His most recent losses would include our current International Champion, Bruce Blank and the always intense Michael Cross. That’s not exactly career killing losses, and the Birdman is no joke either. “Are you serious? He dresses up as a bird. A BIRD!” Both men…erm, man and bird consume the energy manifesting throughout the stadium as the anticipation for the lower card match reaches a devastating pitch. A piece of gold may not be on the line for this match up, but the spectacle behind a bird and a former champion is beyond reason. And let’s be honest, do we need a reason to enjoy the show…oh yeah it’s showtime. DING DING DING!!! Circling the ring, weaving in and out of the center, the Birdman teases the Unique Youth who looks overly anxious to start the match out in the defensive position. Disregarding each chance the Birdman gives the youth to auction off a punch, kick, or collar-and-elbow tie up; Zyon takes a few steps back away from his unorthodox opponent. “It seems Zyon is a bit hesitant to take the Birdman on. In their previous encounter, Zyon didn’t exactly school Birdy as you would put it King.” “Fuck no he didn’t. He got stomped by a person that dresses up as a bird. He had no idea how to go at the mother clucker, and he still has no idea what to do.” The Suicide King reacts to Mak’s polite way of critizing the Unique Youth. However, nobody in the stadium including the Birdman himself was ready for the former Cruiserweight Champion to charge forward in a mad bull rush for the evasive athlete. Easily leaping over the youth with a leap frog, Birdy rotates around so that he is facing the Unique Youth, who comes charging back off of the opposite ropes. Lowering himself for a back body drop attempt, Birdy is unable to complete this opening spotty exchange as Zyon leaps over the five foot eleven prankster with a monkey roll. Quickly, rising back to his feet, Zyon shoots for the back of the Birdman’s head with a wild swing of his right arm as the conscious Birdman nimbly dives forward away from the youth with a monkey roll of his own! Only, the Birdman extends his legs, which puncture the youth’s unprotected sternum, left open by Zyon’s wild lariat attempt. *CRACK!* “Brilliant donkey kick by the Birdman that has dropped Zyon to one knee. He sure wasn’t expecting that one!” Mak compliments the Birdman on his athleticism. Hugging at his sternum, Zyon’s mystical green eyes grow as a feathery foot is initiated in his direction. Tossing both hands into the air to soften the blow, Zyon is forced back on to his ass by the impact of the strike, which sets him up perfectly for a speedy basement dropkick by the Birdman… *SWISH!* …However, Zyon is able to squander out of the way as Birdy is able to get a hand down to soften his collision with the canvas. Both men pop back to their feet, neither willing to escape the ring for a moment’s rest, as it is the Birdman this time playing the part of the aggressor as he shoots himself toward the youth’s chin with a European Uppercut! Tossing his head backward in a retreat away from the jaw jarring strike, Zyon latches on to Birdy’s exposed back with a reverse waist lock. Unable to proceed forward with whatever tactic he desires, Zyon struggles to maintain his grip as the slick Birdman looks to wobble his way out! Irritated by his enemy’s resilience, Zyon plants his feet deep into the canvas, and violently tosses the lightning fast Birdman through the air with a release German suplex! Listening for a BANG, BOOM, or an “OH MY GOD MY NECK,” Zyon turns his head nervously as he realizes that all he can hear is this… Birdman: CAW-CAW! Crowd: CAW-CAW! Dashing forward at the dancing Bird, Zyon catches a wicked kick to the ribs that stops any momentum he could have tried to garner from the anger that dwells deep inside of him. Instead, he finds himself at the mercy of some loser who dresses up as a bird… …The same loser that beat him two weeks ago. Diving down at the doubled over Cruiserweight, Birdy fires off a jaw wrecking European uppercut that sends the youth sprawling to the canvas. Pushing himself off the canvas with his jaw trembling from the powerful strike, Zyon finds himself on the defense, a desperate defense at that. Firing off lefts and rights at a speed that not even the Unique Youth can comprehend, Birdy lights the former Cruiserweight Champion up… *BAM!* *BAM!* *BAM!* *BAM!* *BAM!* *BAM!* …And back into the near turnbuckle. “The Birdman continuing exactly where he left off with the youth,” Mak continues to sing the Birdman’s praises, “If this keeps up, Zyon might suffer another crushing defeat at the hands of the athletic Birdman.” Referee Ken Masters warns the bizarre bird about his closed fists, which the Birdman responds in kind…with another closed first! Latching on to the youth’s wrist, Birdy forces the youth across the ring with an Irish whip, watching with emotionless pleasure as Zyon collides back first into the turnbuckle. Staggering out from the turnbuckle, Zyon is helpless to stop Birdy from locking his hands around his head and driving both knees into his chin with the sensationally painful Bird-Breaker!!! “OOOOOHHHH!” The crowd echoes as Zyon rolls around on the canvas clutching his jaw as the Birdman plops on the Unique Youth with a lateral press. ONE! TWO! KICKOUT!! “Early near fall for the Birdman who has taken the Unique Youth for a ride that I’m sure Zyon wishes he could get off of.” Mak, just like the rest of the world is a bit dumbfounded by Birdy’s destruction of Zyon…again. Picking the youth off the canvas, the Birdman hooks the youth in a front face lock, and attempts a snap suplex, which Zyon blocks with his foot. Shocking the individual behind the secret that is the Birdman, Zyon explodes with a snap suplex of his own, driving the Birdman into the canvas!!! “YEAAAHHHH!” The crowd erupts as the other fan favorite shows signs of life. Rising back to a vertical base, Zyon takes off for the near ropes as Birdy also gathers back to his feet. Clutching his back from the stinging sensation that usually follows a back collision of some sort, Birdman is incapable of halting the youth, who springs off the second rope with a dazzling moonsault body press that ensnares Birdy’s shoulders between the canvas and his body weight. “Excellent maneuver by the crafty youth who could have the Birdman!!!” Mak shouts as referee Ken Masters makes the count. ONE! TWO! NO! Pushing the youth off, Birdy looks up into the bright lights that power the stadium in the darkness. Shadowing the lights would be the young Zyon who forces the Birdman back to his chicken feet. Driving his knee into the sternum of the tenacious Birdman, Zyon forms Birdy into a front face lock as he swings his hips for the always damaging swinging neck breaker… …BUT! But the Birdman swings his hips as well as he goes back to back with his challenger, locking him down for a backslide struggle!!! “Look at that King! These two are so into the combat that they are even reluctant to give way to a simple backslide. Competition at its finest folks!” The Franchise might be a little bit overenthusiastic for this Cruiserweight contest. Each man…ugh, man and bird grunt and grind their way to eternity, but neither man decides to break under the pressure. Jockeying for position, Zyon consciously decides to retreat from this seemingly meaningless struggle, unlocking one arm from the Birdman’s grip… …And placing it around the Cruiserweight’s neck! Diving to the canvas bottom first before the courageous Birdman can figure out a counter to his unfortunate situation, Zyon stuns the mysterious wrestler with a Reverse Single Chickenwing NeckBREAKAAAA!! With feathers floating across the ring in random directions, Zyon rises back to his feet with the Birdman in hand. Struggling to fly away from the youth, Birdy stabs Zyon with a couple quick elbows before transferring the momentum his way with a surprising Irish whip!! Clutching the Birdman’s wrist, Zyon shuffles around, countering his opponent’s Irish whip with one of his own!! Just as the youth begins to feel safe within his confidence against an opponent that has bested him before, the Unique Youth finds his arrogance once again raped by an outside force that blasts him in the face with an AMAZING springboard corkscrew axe hammer smash!!!! “Now that Mak was GOLD! Don’t worry I still find the whole idea behind that dodo brain to be foolish, but that will win you a battle every time. Like a common Cruiserweight, the Birdman was able to counter the Irish whip by springing off the middle rope. But then he shocked that foolish youngster with an old school axe hammer smash with a twist!” King compliments the Bird…he must be a secret PETA member. Taking a moment to rub the feathers surrounding his neck, the Birdman scoops the youth off the canvas and into the air in one flawless flow. Looking to drive the youngster back first into the canvas with a basic scoop slam, the Birdman feels the weight of his opponent depart from his claws. Landing behind the Birdman like his shadow, Zyon traps the Birdman in a cage known as an upside down reverse face lock! Once again, the youth drops to the canvas leaving the Birdman no time to counter a bending 3.0 back breaker!!! “OOOOOOOO!” The crowd responds to Birdy’s awkward positioning across the youth’s back as the mysterious man in a suit descends to the canvas. Hooking the leg, Zyon covers his opponent for the victory! ONE!! TWO!! NO! But even a Bird who makes his living in the air can fight his way off the ground. Forcing himself and his enemy back to their respective feet, Zyon drives the point of his sharp elbow into the soft dermis of his opponent, located in the neck region as a method of softening his opponent up for something bigger no doubt. Whipping the Birdman across the ring with little struggle, Zyon steps up at the ferocious Birdy… …CAUGHT OFF GUARD BY A CROSS BODY ATTEMPT!!! However, just like their last encounter, Zyon uses his freshly developed muscle mass to not only catch, but also arrange the Birdman for the Aero Driver!!! Thrusting the mysterious individual head first toward the unforgiving mat, Zyon’s leg is suddenly bolted down by the marginal weight of his opponent’s hands before being sent forward into a shocking cradle!!! ONE!!!! TWO!!!! THREEEEEEE! “HE GOT HIM!!!” Mak shouts before looking at the referee and then at his broadcast partner. “Well that was certainly close. Hey hot wheels, how about if we settle down over there.” Staring at the ref with his same blank mascot expression, the Birdman can just shake his head as referee Ken Masters tosses two fingers into the air! Due to having all of his attention deviated at the referee, Birdy is blind to Zyon’s actions as the youth exits out to the ring apron and grabs his opponent’s undivided attention the only way he knows how… Zyon: CAW-CAW!! Crowd: CAW-CAW!! Birdman: ????? …Before springing off the top rope with his right arm towed backward. As he inches his way toward the individual he sees as a villain, imitating Superman, Zyon unleashes the trigger on his right forearm just as THE BIRDMAN SHOOTS ZYON OUT OF THE SKY WITH A LEAPING GAMENGIRI TO THE FACE!!! *CRRRRRRAAACKKKK!* “Holy Shit!” Rolling around on the canvas, clutching his face with the type of unceremonious shock that comes from having a foot driven into your unprotected face, Zyon can barely hear the audible “holy shit” chant as he tries to pull himself back to his feet!! “This match has been fantastic. Definitely on par with their first encounter. Zyon has come to play tonight and the Birdman has been in top form ever since his re-emergence from a nest somewhere in Idaho!” “Idaho? Why Idaho?” “Cause you sleep for money! Hahahahahaha!” Mak bursts into tears over his own joke. “I didn’t know you were such a comedian Mak. I mean I must admit, I’m not half as funny as you, but unlike you I can do this…” King finishes as he effortlessly crosses his legs. “HA!” Staggering around the ring as his eyes begin to refocus on the action at hand, Zyon is unable to prevent the Birdman from grabbing his head and sending him face first into the nearest top turnbuckle! Blood trickling from the very nose that was crushed by the earlier gamengiri, Zyon’s face continues to ache as Birdy forces the youth face first into the turnbuckle pad once more… *CRACK!!* …Or not. Startling the uber talented mascot with a stinging elbow to the sternum, Zyon uses the little space, the minor opportunity he has to begin ascending the top rope! Recovering much quicker than the Unique Youth expected, the Birdman climbs on to the ropes with his frantic opponent, locking a leg behind his enemy’s. Gripping the ropes with his hands, Zyon refuses to be killed by a common predator’s prey! Yet, the Birdman is quite consistent with his pessimistic approach to defeating the youth once again. Using his near arm to force the youth face first into the top turnbuckle, Birdy has brought upon the opening he needs as he lunges backward… …BRINGING THE YOUTH DOWN WITH HIM!!!! *CRASHHHHHH!!!* “HOLY SHIT!!!” The chanting is much louder this time as a barely conscious Zyon can hear them as clear as day. “So much for him being an old school type high flyer. Oh well, I’ve always been entertained by train wrecks.” The King of Hearts shrugs. ONE! Referee Ken Masters begins his mandatory ten count as the awestruck audience counts along. TWO! THREE! FOUR! FIVE! “The Birdman looks to be coming to…” Mak trails off just as interested in the proceedings as the common fan. Crawlingly across the canvas toward his fallen Cruiserweight alumni, Birdy drapes his feathered arm across the youth’s chest, using it to tug the rest of his body on to the Unique Youth for the lateral press. ONE! TWO! NO!!! “YEEEEAAAAHHHH!” The crowd responds in kind to the heart shown by both men as the Birdman forces the youth up to his feet by his perspirated soaked hair, locking his foot behind Zyon’s! Arranging the youth for a conventional Russian leg sweep, Birdy in unable to establish complete dominance once he feels the smolder of pain sting his sternum… *BAM!* *BAM!* *BAM!* *BAM!* …Due to a secession of left jabs by the youth. Slinging his leg over the doubled over mascot, Zyon restrains Birdy’s near arm, forcing it to extend straight out for leverage. Driving the confused Birdman’s arm forward, Zyon pushes his leg in the same direction forcing his opposition to the canvas with a rolling neckbreaker!!! Now it’s Zyon that falls on to the Birdman, praying for the best…praying for the three. ONE!!! TWO!!!! THRKICKOUT!!!! Thrusting his shoulder off the canvas, Birdy brings his fans back into this competitive war between high flying warriors looking for the humongous victory. Snatching the aerial creature from the canvas by his beak, Zyon takes a moment to look out into the rabid audience. “Zyon who has shown signs of arrogance in the past seems to be proving to everyone that he has everything under control.” Mak explains why Zyon is grabbing at his opponent’s beak. “Then tell me Mak, how come I don’t buy the kid’s new found confidence. We both know he’s going to blow it.” King reassures Mak that Zyon is screwed. Aggressively snaring the mysterious individual in a bird costume in a tight front face lock, Zyon pops his hips, crushing the Birdman with a swinging neckbreaker! Realizing his opponent’s neck could be in shambles; the youth disregards the pin attempt, and opts to force the feathery fighter back to his feet. Bouncing off the near ropes, Zyon steps off of his opponent’s knee, sending his knee upward toward the Birdman’s face with a Shining Wizard… …That doesn’t get the chance to work its magic as the Birdman topples the youth to the canvas with a vicious spinebuster!!! Huffing and wheezing on the canvas, Zyon wishes he could have the oxygen he just lost back as the Birdman takes a moment to gather his thoughts. Twisting his body away from the youth, Birdy unravels on top of the youth with a whirl of amazing athleticism in the shape of a standing shooting star press!! However, the Unique Youth uses what is left of his vitality to roll out of the way… …But the Birdman is much quicker, smashing the youth’s back with the attack! Rubbing his wounded neck with one hand while lifting the youth with the other, Birdy Irish whips the youngster across the ring and into the turnbuckle…OR SO HE THOUGHT! Dynamic like C4 explosives, Zyon leaps to the top rope, soaring backward with his signature No Regard corkscrew body attack THAT LANDS FLUSH ON THE EMOTIONLESS BIRDMAN!!!! “YEAHHHHH!!!” The crowd erupts as the youth rolls off of his opponent, pushing himself back to his feet. Gazing down on the mascot, Zyon complete with fatigue and rapidly blinking eyes, curses his “joke” of an opponent. Foolishly, the youth waits for the Birdman to ascend back to his feet, leaving everyone to question his motives. Visibly tired, Birdy gets back to his feet, and advances on to his opponent… *SMACK!* …JUST TO BE DISRESPECTFULLY SMACKED IN THE FACE!! One would think that beneath the mirage of a silly bird costume, a man would be fuming from such arrogance. And you would be right. Just like in their last match, the Birdman comes rocketing back with a smack of his own… *SMMMMM…SWISH!!!* …Just to almost get taken down with a fujiwara armbar!!! “AHHHHHHHH!” “GENIUS! Zyon provoked the Birdman in a way that would set him up perfectly for the Gouki Crossface!!!” Mak sees through Zyon’s arrogant show for what it really is. Everyone in the stadium panics for the Birdman, afraid to see their favorite mascot in the painful submission hold. Of course, Zyon should be the one panicking since he only ALMOST got the Birdman down with the fujiwara arm bar. Pivoting on his feet, the Birdman creates a whirlwind that compels the youth to release his grip on the amazing Birdman who shoots into the youth with a knee to the sternum. Pulling the youth into a standing headscissor, the Birdman lifts the youngster from his waist to where he is perched on his shoulders… *BAM!* *BAM!* …But the youth fires back with fiery rights that weaken the athletic Birdman just enough to drop Zyon… *WHAM!* …Right on the spine of his back with the rare snap powerbomb that lead to the youth’s doom in their previous encounter!!!! The audience battles each other as the Birdman is having a difficult time rising back to his feet. Yet his opponent is having an even more difficult time remaining conscious. Lumbering over toward the turnbuckle, the Birdman calls out to his faithful… Birdman: CAW-CAW!! Crowd: CAW-CAW!! Leaping on to the top rope, the wary Birdman salutes the crowd as he dives into the sky for an immense amount of hang time. “He’s going for the BIRD DROPPING!!!” Mak puts emphasis on moves named after a bird’s feces…bizarre. Watching one of their favorites soar through the sky, the crowd watches as the Birdman crushes the youth with the Bird Dropping… *CRACK!* …That rockets down upon the youth’s knees!!! “Zyon got the knees up!! He learned in their last match that the Bird Dropping is straight up fatal.” Mak shouts, “And he realized earlier from the standing shooting star press that avoiding a maneuver like that entirely would not work. Now can he capitalize???” Rolling around on the canvas, shockingly depressed that the Unique Youth didn’t just lie down and die like last time, the Birdman clutches his sternum, wishing the youngster would just fall into a slumber one last time! Inching his way closer to the kneeling youth, the Birdman prepares to continue his assault on the young man with the attention…the wish…that he would just die… …Just like last time. Sadly for Birdy, the Unique Youth has picked up a thing or two since last time. Leaping into the air from a kneeling position, Zyon wraps both hands around the Birdman’s head forming a ¾ headlock before rushing his physically and mentally fatigued opponent into the canvas with a Perfect Bo mimicked Ace Cutter!!! “Hey damnit that’s the Perfect Pain!!!” The Suicide King calls out immediately. “Actually King, Zyon calls that the Big Shot!” Rolling on to his fallen adversary, Zyon hooks his opponent’s leg, hoping for a better outcome than “Just like last time.” ONE!!!! TWO!!! THREEEE!!! DING DING DING!!!!! “Your winner, earning a shot for the Cruiserweight Title sometime after Genesis, the Unique Youth ZYYYYON!!!” “What a match! Both men came out and put on a show for the fans. Each man worked hard for the victory, but Zyon’s attack was a bit more focused than the Birdman’s, which is quite a surprise. While Birdy did stick to his low risk aerial strategy, Zyon was able to mix it up with his suicidal approach along with focusing on the neck. Also…” “MAK! The kid hit the Birdman with his version of the Perfect Pain…end of story. It’s a fantastic maneuver, especially when the user is quick on their feet. That mascot never saw it coming.” The Suicide King actually gives a non biased report on the match. “And up next Johnny Dangerous returns to action facing off against the man that was born to main event Genesis, Tom Flesher…stay tuned!” FADE