Art Sandusky

... You're okay, Kreese. I had a similar few days a couple of years ago during which I was oddly fixated on the Ricky Martin epic "She's All I Ever Had."

Journey gets a pass because most of the people here are white. Something in our genes makes them ultimately immune to criticism.

Why exactly are you still dealing with these people? Let 'em go make little retard babies and enjoy your life.

Correct. Utensils may only be applied to cut the burger in two if it's too big/sloppy to stay together in one piece.

I started out not liking the sun, but the older and more vain I become, the more I enjoy the feeling of those rays.

I lawl'ed. It gets funnier if you imagine that he tried to give everything in his hotel room (even the poor bed!) an RKO.

For those curious, it averages out to a terrorist attack somewhere in the world every 37 minutes. That can't possibly be considered progress.

You know Marvin, if you leave the house a small asteroid could tear through the sky and bonk you on the head. My teeth have always been in good shape. I needed a crown when I was little, but no work's been necessary on my adult teeth. I wish I didn't have a fucked up jawbone (when I grit my incisors one side of my teeth line up flush but there's space on the other side) and a slight overbite though.

Anyone who ruins Beach Boys songs goes on my "People To Kill" list. This counts, threefold.

Sorry for shattering the danceaholic image.

I think the only soldiers that want to stay over there were the ones who joined so they could yell "BOOM! HEADSHOT!" for real.

BUTTAFUOCO!!

Hm. Strange, I don't have that problem. Besides, if advertising has taught me anything it's that the sizzle in your mouth means it's working.

I think Moss has got a couple of good years left in him at least, it's always been a matter of motivation and people keeping his ass in line. Because of this, I can't think of a more frightening team for him to be paired with. Still, I'm incredibly relieved he won't be in the green and gold. I wouldn't care if he had a magical 2,000yd/30TD year, I'd still bail on the team if they'd gotten him instead.

I'd be so terrified I'd run on the water for a few steps before I sank.

Yeah, where does mouthwash fit in with all this? I do the same thing, figuring that mouthwash (being a liquid that can get into every crack and crevice) is slightly more effective than flossing.

Hater.

I don't mind, you guys suffer enough.

(cough)pmstreamifthereisoneplz(cough)

Summer means a LOT more bluegrass and loads of Ventures. The spring is when I get into 80s stuff, and the summer brings the 60s kick. Winter means hard trance and house, but summer's all about some straight dance.

Danielson made Cena look like a million bucks. Shame he's too small to ever be a WWE guy.

Whenever the hell I feel like it.

Most people 'round here have a fine tan by the middle of May, so that's my target. If you're pale in the middle of July in Charleston, you either work nights or totally suck.

Geez, there's your problem! You put wings in your mouth, just like other food.