King Cucaracha

'Welcome to the OAOAST, Mother******' OAOAST 24/7 Championship Landon "La Cucaracha" Maddix vs. Biff Atlas

AMW have run their course and Storm and Harris could be decent additions to a midcard singles scene, but the idea of them one on one does absolutely nothing for me.

Okay, so WWE is October 1st, so if we say Syndicated will be October 15th, that'd give us time to write the tag match/matches for WWE and War Games. Zack, I'm assuming by WWE that War Games will already by announced. In which case, we could maybe have two tag matches. Usual Suspects vs. 2 of the 'SWF' 4 and The GPX vs. the other 2. That way, we can have you, me and/or Bruce handle them, rather than having possibly three active guys on one match. Syndicated only being an hour shouldn't be a big problem if we limit the card. Maybe have some non-match segments to build towards the PPV afterwards. We should probably only use Syndicated for 'special occassions'. The first was a new idea, the second would have been the 10 Man Tag, this'll be War Games. One idea I'd like to do next year would be Survival Of The Fittest, although that wouldn't really make sense for an hour show. But maybe an extended Syndicated? Or even instead of BattleBowl (seeing as it's sort of a singles BattleBowl)? We could come up with 6 interesting, maybe even first-time matches (like Leon vs. Reject, or Zack vs. Bohemoth) and we wouldn't need to build storylines for them.

If you're doing this, you should technically have the people who held the Kingship without winning the tournament. So Savage is a must. I forget if Duggan, Haku or Race won tournaments but they were all Kings of the WWF.

Anyone interested in a Chris Harris/James Storm feud? Anyone at all? Me neither.

*mark-out for UltraMantis* I've been saying Claudio for years. Guy's ripped to shreds and he can actually work.

Well it'd make sense to have a couple of matches on the undercard. No doubt there'd be a promo from each team to fit in, so there'd have to be some filler.

If we're looking at ideal cards, there's only one match I can think of which I'd be desperate to see on a Mania card, which is Undertaker vs. Chris Benoit.

JBL. And yeah, apparantly he's a fan of Yang as a worker.

That was TK/Alf vs. Drek and Hoff, silly.

BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, at this time please welcome at this time... your NEW OAOAST 24/7 Champion... "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COLE Oh boy. BUFFER ...being accompanied to the ring by The Wildcards and by 'The First Lady Of The SWF' Megan Skye... fresh off of a successful challenge for the SWF World Tag Team Championships! He is LLLAAANNDDOOOOOONN "LA CUCARACHA"... MMMAAAAAAAADDIIIIIIIIXXXXXXXXXX!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" "Tell me exactly, what am I supposed to do Now that I have allowed you, to beat me! Do you think that we could play another game Maybe I could win this ti-ime." "I kinda like the misery you put me through Darling you can trust me, completely! If you even try to look the other way I think that I could kill this ti-ime!" You could cut the hostility with a knife in the arena as the Virginia crowd keep jeering all the way through the opening to "The Game" by Disturbed. The situation isn't helped by The Wildcards emerging halfway through and walking towards the ring, Bloodshed and Todd Cortez staying mostly stoic about the situation while Bruce Blank is happy to milk the abuse a little. Eventually, as the song kicks into gear, the trio are joined on stage by the glowing blonde female now identifiable as Megan Skye, long-term manager of Landon Maddix, who steps through the entrance doors carrying both the OAOAST's 24/7 Championship belt and one half of the SWF's World Tag Team Championships. If you thought The Wildcards and Landon hadn't came prepared, you'd be wrong, as down the side of the ramp dozens of security guards emerge from the back and line the aisleway as The SWF's Power Couple stroll down the ramp, mugging for all their worth. COLE No folks, you haven't tuned into the wrong station. This really is SWF superstar Landon Maddix making his way to the ring and that is the OAOAST 24/7 Championship in his hand. It's been a topic of hot conversation all week and to be honest, myself and The Coach are as much or as little in the know about this volatile situation as you all are. But we've been promised an explanation here tonight, so hopefully that's what we're going to get to kick off [i]OAOAST[/i] HeldDOWN~! With his three 'associates' waiting in the ring, Landon climbs the apron as Megan holds the ropes open for him. Stepping in, Landon soaks up some more adulation as he spins through the ring, arms outstretched. Coming to a stop, Landon then takes the microphone from Buffer, beaming proudly as the boos continue to rain down on him. MADDIX So, it seems I caused a little bit of controversy last week, huh? "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" MADDIX Good answer. You know, I want to take this opportunity to first thank your gracious president, Axel, for opening the floor up to me tonight and giving me a chance to explain my motives. See all I've heard over the 'net' all week is rumour after rumour after persistant rumour. So let's set the record straight. Number one...no, I haven't 'quit' the SWF. I'm here of my own accord, independent of my other employers. Now, second is that 'I'm not getting paid enough', so I wanted another paycheck. One truth in life, you can never be too rich. I want more money, sure. So shoot me. Landon puts a finger to his chin in a not so subtle show that he's thinking. MADDIX On second thoughts, maybe I should rephrase that. "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COLE Oh come on, we don't need that dredged up again. MADDIX I showed up in the OAOAST for my own reasons. And I'm gonna let you all in on them. See, for those of you morons who don't pay attention, I work for the SWF. Flashback to June and to a little event we call SWF Ground Zero, where I was heading into one of the biggest matches of my career against my current tag team partner, Michael Stephens. Long story short, we didn't get along. I was ready to defend my SWF World Title against my most hated rival. It was personal. And I was ready. I was focused. I stoof behind those curtains watching the camera and much to my surprise, some low budget promotional video runs telling MY SWF fans to watch OAOAST HeldDOWN~!, every Thursday night on TSM! I took that advert as a personal spit in my face. But if you think it's all about some commercial, you're mistaken. No, that was just the tip of the iceberg, the thing that caught my attention. For the first time since grabbing the microphone Landon turns to his trio of backup. Neither Blank, Bloodshed or Cortez seem all that interested in what's going on, considering who it's coming from and what it concerns. MADDIX See, these three men here have been running roughshot over this company for months now and you people have seen them as representing the SWF. I'm sure in many ways, they are. But as is typical with professional wrestling fans, you've taken a stereotype and lumped it on the heads of as many people as is convenient. Apparantly, Bruce is a 'Hoss'. That's not my beef. See, the 'beef' is that I see people calling the SWF... 'Garbage Wrestling'. "YYEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" MADDIX You take three men known for their street fighting sensibilities and you assume, without doing any research or paying any attention, natch, that it applies to the entire SWF. And THAT is a spit in the face to me. That's a spit in the face of El Luchadore Magnifico. Of Danny Williams. Of Ejiro Fasaki. Of Tom Flesher. Of Wildchild. Men who wouldn't sully their good name by stepping into this B-show hellhole because they have some form of self-respect! You people dare to say the SWF is 'garbage'? In the words of every black comedian in the past 10 years, "Bitch, puh-lease!!" Take a glance into that locker room, if you dare. You've got doctors running around bumping and grinding, you've got homosexual Mexicans, you've got more rip-offs and wannabees than an American Idol audition room. THAT is garbage! The SWF is the premier professional wrestling company in the world and we pride ourselves on that. We pride ourselves on wrestling. We're not a 'Thread', we're [i]'Wrestling[/i]! Do chairs and tables come into play sometimes? Sure, from some people. But I defy you to name one OAOAST wrestler who could survive in the SWF! Just one! It's not gonna happen. There's not even a valid comparison. All I've heard from you fantasy booker geeks for years is 'oh, what would happen if this guy wrestled Landon Maddix, what would happen if that guy wrestled Landon Maddix?'. 'Leon Rodez can do this better than Landon Maddix'. 'Zack Malibu has better workrate than Landon Maddix does'. Heh. See, let me be clear on this. Wrestling fans in general, I've no problem with you. You support this great industry and you buy the tickets that pay our wages and feed our families. Boo me, cheer me, whatever. But these fans who think they're experts because they've read a couple of dirtsheets and saw that Secrets Exposed thing Harley Race did, that's who I'm talking about here. You compare the SWF to the OAOAST...first of all, we actually have a reasonable name. But in the ring is where the gulf is clear. If the SWF is the big league, the OAOAST is the backyard...compared to us, you're like a group of, to steal a phrase, "glorified stuntmen", [i]playing[/i] at wrestling. It's not competition, it's a running joke! COLE Yeah well, at least we wrestle in the real world there champ. COACH Huh? COLE Inside joke, don't sweat it. "SMART - MARK SUCKS!" "SMART - MARK SUCKS!" "SMART - MARK SUCKS!" "SMART - MARK SUCKS!" MADDIX Uneducated opinions. That's all it is. See, I'm not 'Mr. SWF' and some sort of model employee. But I'm sick of seeing you mutant morons proclaiming the OAOAST as the premiere and the summit of this business. I'm sick of people talking up these mediocre sub-par 'superstars' as equals for the SWF's elite. So, I cornered Bruce at one of the SWF shows and I asked him who to get into contact with. And Mr...uhm, Axel...well, he was happy to help. COLE Of course he was, if it meant Leon getting beaten down! MADDIX Don't get me wrong, I'm not here to be a Wildcard. I'm not here to 'kill this company'. And I'm not solely here to take the words of the OAOAST faithful and cram them back down their throats. Let's not beat around the bush, I'm out for the glory. I'm here to BE this company. Looking up and down the roster, there's nobody with my ability and my credentials, so hey, if there's an opportunity to be number one why should I pass it up? And if that means an 'association' with these three here every now and then, then so be it. Safety in numbers and all. See... Maddix turns again, pointing a finger in Bruce's face... MADDIX I don't like you. ...then Cortez... MADDIX I [i]hate[/i] you. ...and finally Bloodshed. MADDIX And I've [b]despised[/b] you for more years than I care to remember. Bloodshed half-smiles at that, apparantly more than happy to be hated by Landon. Infact, none of The Wildcards seem that concerned that they're not on Landon's Christmas card list. MADDIX But the fact is, we share a common bond. Smartmark blood. You and me are pretty recent acquaintances Bruce and we don't see eye to eye, but I respect you, in a way. You do what you do and you do it well. I've done battle with you Bloodshed...well shit, I've lost count. You'll have to show me that tally chart you keep treasured in your basement. Cortez, you and me are former Tag Team Champions. And yeah, we had a pretty big falling out over...things. Megan shrugs in the background. Yeah, she's the reason. MADDIX Whatever you think about me though, you have to respect my motives. (turns to crowd) And with those three following my lead... In the background, Bruce does a very clear and very noticeable double-take at that last line. Cortez and Bloodshed, who've been associated with La Cucaracha in the past, just roll their eyes knowingly. Of course Landon is oblivious to all this, due to that bright and welcomed spotlight shining in his face. MADDIX ...then you fans had better get used to seeing Landon "La Cucaracha" Maddix's face around these parts, because I'm here to save the OAOAST! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COLE From what!? COACH From gun crime? COLE ... COACH Sorry, got carried away for a second. From what, punk!? MADDIX Mark the date down on your calendars, folks. A battle for the ages. August 27th, you've got something called 'AngleSlam' which I hear is a pretty big deal for you all. Well congratulations, because it just got bigger. I spoke to Axel during the week and he's granted me a match that believe it or not, I want. The crowd join the dots in their head and start buzzing at the prospect of what Landon is getting at. MADDIX Oh yeah I know, I attacked the guy, I'm supposed to be scared of the repercussions, blah blah blah. Last week was no coincidence you see. There was a plan. I always have a plan, see. Landon and Megan share a smile, Landon adjusting the two titles over his shoulders. MADDIX I intend to show the OAOAST up and embarrass you all. And sure, I could do that by wrestling 'El Ultra Shango' and dominating him to the point of ridicule. But that'd be too easy. Myself and Megan have done our homework and you, Leon Rodez, are something that comes close to resembling a straight professional wrestler as far as this place is concerned. Sure, you're a 'former pornstar' and you've been wrestling chickens and zombies recently. But apparantly these people and the 'experts' see you as some sort of noteable talent in these parts. As the 'future of the OAOAST'. Which makes you the perfect target. So Leon, what I'm gonna do at AngleSlam is I'm going to take the future of this company and defeat it, soundly, on one of the biggest nights in the OAOAST calendar. I'm going to embarrass you. I'm going to embarrass this company. And I'm going to make my intentions clear straight away. Landon Maddix vs. Leon Rodez. The match nobody thought they'd ever see. But they will, at AngleSlam. COLE Wow. That's a HUGE announcement! MADDIX And I've got more good news for all you wrestling fans who are sick of watching no-talents wrestling talentless nobodies show in and show out, because the Landon Maddix era in the OAOAST starts live, next week here on HeldDOWN~! Oh yeah, I want to get a little warm-up in see. Test the ring, test the ropes, the lights. It'll be a chance for those of you so set in your ways that you've never seen real wrestling to get a glimpse at why I am a former two-time SWF World Heavyweight Champion, a former International Champion, three-time ICTV Champion, two-time USJL Champion, three-time Tag Team Champion, 2005 Clusterfuck winner...and the list goes on. I don't know who they'll find to put against me. Probably some trainee in a bear costume. Whatever, I'll give you a little preview next week. After all, from what I hear you people need a new hero and quick. And I am willing to BE that hero! OAOAST... Prepare For Landon! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" "The Game" by Disturbed kicks off again as Maddix drops the microphone and throws his arms skywards in a gesture which could be best described as 'a little OTT'. COLE Wow. Well, Landon Maddix, not a man short on confidence apparantly. COACH And we're gonna see him in action next week here on HeldDOWN~! I can't wait for that, I wanna see if this guy is really as good as he seems to think he is. COLE You could always buy some SWF tapes, do some research. COACH Nah, I'm not gonna be doing that. COLE What about the other big announcement Coach, Landon Maddix making his OAOAST PPV debut against Leon Rodez at AngleSlam! What a huge match that promises to be. And speaking of huge matches, remember viewers, tonight we've got Hoff versus Alfdogg for the World Heavyweight Championship, not to mention that big Rumble for the chance to cash in on a World Title shot whenever the winner so desires. COACH So basically, what Zack already has? COLE Uhm, well, kinda...ON WITH THE SHOW!

[b][COLOR=red]ANGLESLAM[/COLOR] [COLOR=orange]2006[/COLOR][/b] Wrestlers On A Plane~!...and then, later, in the ring 10 Days Left! COLE Welcome back to HeldDOWN~! and yes, we are indeed just ten days away from AngleSlam 2006! JAX Almost Christmas! COLE Indeed. Last week, in the midst of one of the craziest, most out of control HeldDOWN~!s in OAOAST history, we saw The Hooligans lay an unprovoked three on two beatdown on D*LUX. The upshot of it is this next match which pits "Tremendous" Tyler Bryant against one third of those Hooligans, Jamie O'Hara. But this all stems from O'Hara's 6-Man Tag Team Championship partners The Global Party Exchange, who join me now, and what is in my estimation gentlemen a chip on your shoulders. STATIC Chip on our shoulder, huh? There ain't nothin' on our shoulders, we brush it off daily. JAX What does that mean? STATIC Eh, I dunno, J-OH said it to me last week and I figured it sounded cute. Point is, there ain't no chips on our shoulders Mickey Cole. COLE Well how else do you explain this sudden and unprovoked targetting of the HI-YAH Tag Team Champions? All because you feel they've 'stolen' your personas? STATIC [i]Former[/i] personas. JAX Ain't it 'personi'? STATIC Whatever. Listen, these kids wanna impersonate us and bring up crap we buried years back and we've moved on from. Soon as they walked onto our radar, we figured we oughta put those punks in their place. See, it's all about respect. Image is everything to us, 'specially in this business. JAX I guess we should be honoured. But we ain't. How'd you like it somebody came out here rippin' on your act every week Cole? STATIC Todd. Grisham. COLE (under breath) He's half the man I am. "JUST ONE ON ONE THAT'S THE WAY WE DO IT BABY! JUST ONE ON ONE, THAT'S THE WAY WE DO IT! JUST ONE ON ONE THAT'S THE WAY WE DO IT BABY! JUST ONE ON ONE, THAT'S THE WAY WE DO IT!" Love it or hate it, A1's "First To Believe" cues up and sends Norfolk boyband bananas as the entrance doors are parted by the vibrant manageress of D*LUX, Jade Rodez. Not so vibrant tonight however, as she leads out her team, decked in orange denim but in a less than sunny mood. Ripping off his jacket and throwing it to the floor, Tyler storms down the aisle, with Shayne in tow and Jade trying to keep pace. BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, the following contest is scheduled for one fall. Introducing first, being accompanied to the ring by Jade Rodez and "Showtime" Shayne Brave. He hails from Auburn Hills, Michigan... weighing two hundred, nine pounds. One half of the HI-YAH World Tag Team Champions... "TREMENDOUS" TYYYLLEEEERR... BBBRRRRRYYYYYAAAAAAANNTT!!!! "YYEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!" Sliding into the ring, Tyler heads right across to the side of the ring nearest the announce table and point the finger at Static and Jax, which prompts The GPX to stand. COLE Come on guys, we don't need any trouble out here. STATIC I agree Mitchell. We just came to comment on our bro's match, these punks need to ease it up on the hostility here. D*LUX continue to yell down at The GPX about last week's beatdown, even as the vulgar beats of Cassidy's "I'm A Hustla" hit in the background to bring out the third of three Hooligans. Emerging onto the stage, Jamie O'Hara pays little attention to the ring as he jaws away to the fans, to the camera, to the bigman upstairs, to anyone who may be within earshot. BUFFER And the opponent, from Birmingham England. Weighing in at one hundred and seventy pounds... he is one third of the OAOAST 6-Man Tag Team Champions of the World... "THE BIRMINGHAM BAD BOY"... JJAAAAAMMIIIIEEE... O'HHHAAAAAAAARRRRRAAAAAAAAA!!!! JAX Now, here's a playa that doesn't rip anyone off! COLE That's a little debata... STATIC A true original! No gimmick stealing there! Making his slow and brash way to the ring, O'Hara unstraps his 6-Man Tag Title belt and thrusts it in the faces of some anti-Hooliganers who are brandishing a "GPX RIPPED OFF N'SYNC" sign. After a good twenty seconds of trash-talk, O'Hara then makes his way around the ring and exchanges high-fives with his Hooligan bretheren over at Sofa Central. The GPX go off mic briefly as they fire their tag partner up, Jamie leaving his 6-Man Title in their reliable hands before climbing to the ring apron and vaulting over the top into the ring to a smattering of applause and some audible boos. COLE So we've got HI-YAH Tag Champion versus Six Man Tag Champion one on one. Two tag team specialists, although I'd say O'Hara has the edge in singles experience. We've seen Tyler in just one singles match before in the OAOAST, against Ned Blanchard. *DINGDINGDING!* O'Hara warms up in the corner as Shayne and Jade leave the ring, keeping a careful eye on The GPX as they position themselves across the ring. Coming out of his corner, Tyler still seems a little pre-occupied with The GPX at ringside but he shakes it off as O'Hara shoves him in the back and encourages him to "Come 'an 'ave a go!" if he thinks he's hard enough. *SLAP!* And evidently, Tyler does, as he slaps the young punk in the face! "OOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHH!!" COLE Oooh! I think Tyler just played O'Hara's punk card! STATIC No way! Nobody plays The Hooligans' punk cards! Make him pay J-OH, make him pay Hooligan style! Reeling from the slap, O'Hara seems to accept that he deserved that and motions to calm the situation down. However, his calmness is all a set-up, as he lures Tyler in and swipes... ...slap, ducked... *SLAP!* ...and Tyler slaps O'Hara for a second time! "YOU GOT SERVED!" "YOU GOT SERVED!" "YOU GOT SERVED!" "YOU GOT SERVED!" Tired of being slapped around, the fuming O'Hara pops back to his feet and lunges with a forearm which rocks Tyler back a step. O'Hara throws another forearm, and a third, without much weight behind them due to his scrawny frame. But the combination is enough to daze Tyler, leaving his arm dangling to set-up an irish whip. A reversal puts pay to Jamie's plans as Tyler sends him off the ropes, catching him on the rebound with a hiptoss...but O'Hara spins through in mid-air and lands on his feet! Taking a moment to gain his footing, the slippy, flippy O'Hara stuns Tyler with a quick kick to the gut and gets his intended irish whip this time. Back bounces Tyler as O'Hara tumbles towards him with an attempted spinwheel kick. Tyler manages to come to a halt in mid-run though and catches O'Hara, dumping him backwards with a back suplex! COLE Oh! Right on the back of his head! STATIC That's okay Jamie, shake it off! O'Hara does indeed try to shake it off as he pulls himself back to his feet. Waiting on him, Tyler measures the 6-Man Tag Champion and pops him with a right hand. A second. Three, four...DUCK! O'Hara avoids the fifth punch, tapping his temple as he wheels back around ....only to get caught with a clothesline that flips him inside out! "OOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" Taking a chest bump, O'Hara bounces over onto his back and Tyler makes an immediate pin... 1... 2... Kickout. Back to his feet, "Tremendous" Tyler waits on O'Hara and lands a right hand. O'Hara staggers back into the ropes and staggers right back, walking into a boot to the gut that doubles him over. It's Tyler who hits the ropes now, coming back with a swinging neckbreaker that leaves O'Hara flailing weakly on the canvas. Another cover made by Tyler... 1... 2... Kickout again. Wisely, O'Hara now tries to roll out of the ring. Unfortunately for him though, Tyler isn't prepared to give his opponent any time to recoupperate and grabs hold of the trailing baggy tacksuit pants, dragging O'Hara back into the centre of the ring. Pulling SuperJay up by the hair, Tyler then points out to The GPX and tells them this is for them... JAX SPIKED PUNCH! *SLAP!* "WHOOOOOOOO!" ...and lands a knifedge chop! STATIC Wait, that was for me? He didn't steal my move. I'm shocked. JAX Yeah, but he kinda looked like me while he was doin' it, so it counts. Another whip is set up by Tyler, but O'Hara spins through and lands a boot. Already O'Hara is looking a little woozy but he's nothing if not gutsy. Or maybe over-confident. Either way, O'Hara sets up for a vertical suplex on the boyband sensation. Placing his leg inside of his opponent's, Tyler is able to block the suplex attempt not once but twice, giving him time to find a better grip on O'Hara's tracksuit pants and take Jamie over with his own suplex... ...which Jamie flips out of! Landing on his feet, O'Hara rushes into the ropes behind him and soars forward... *SLAP!* "WHOOOOOOOO!" ...only to get chopped out of mid-air!! STATIC GAH! COLE O'Hara isn't fairing too well here guys. I think you might have lit a fire underneath Tyler Bryant with that attack last week because he's come out rocking tonight. JAX Come out rockin'? What, he's rippin' off the Heavenly Rockers now too? O'Hara has finally had enough. And he tells everyone in earshot, in no uncertain terms, that he's had enough as he rolls from the ring jawing with no-one in particular and takes a rest on the apron. Being on the apron, he of course leaves himself within range of Tyler Bryant, as he rushes up behind O'Hara and lands a dropkick to the back, sending O'Hara lurching off the apron and to the floor! With a show of natural agility O'Hara manages to land on his feet on the arena floor, despite the pain in his back. But that does him little good, as when he turns around, Tyler is soaring through the air, launching over the top and wiping Jamie out with an impressive PLANCHA!! "YYEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!" STATIC C'mon J', that's your deal, don't let him do that to you! "TY - LER!" "TY - LER!" "TY - LER!" "TY - LER!" The vocal majority, shrill and female voiced as they may be, give it up for Tyler as he pops back to his feet and exchanges high-fives with Shayne and Jade. Tyler then grabs O'Hara, dumping him back into the ring and heading back after him, via the top rope. Climbing the buckles, Tyler reaches the first floor as O'Hara climbs back up to his feet. O'Hara looks lost and does a full turn, before finding Tyler coming off the top... ...and he DUCKS the soaring crossbody, leaving Tyler to plummet into the canvas!! "OOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHH!" STATIC Point to your temple! Point to your temple! Almost as if on cue, O'Hara taps the temple. STATIC YES! That means he's smart, see. JAX For sure. How else 'we supposed to know? COLE Well, that was a smart move by O'Hara, avoiding the dive from Tyler who went to the well once too often with the high-risk manoeuvres. O'Hara quickly capitalises and lays in the stomps, a little wearily but still with something behind them. Rolling Tyler onto his back, O'Hara then tells the crowd to "watch this", as he springs up and tumbles through the air, landing across Tyler's chest with a STANDING SPIRAL TAP!!! COLE Unbelieveable! O'HARA YOU CAN'T [i]DO[/i] THAT, DAWG! Obligatory badmouth laid on, O'Hara attempts the lateral press... 1... 2... ...two count only! COLE O'Hara took far too long to follow up with the pinfall there. The brash youngster takes the count up with referee Charles Robinson, who's adamant about the count. So O'Hara is forced to drag Tyler back up, grabbed hold of the orange denim jeans and pitching him over into the corner, sending him shoulder first into the top turnbuckle. O'Hara then pulls Tyler to face him, driving in a forearm to the face. Another forearm finds the mark before O'Hara loads up a whip, sending Tyler across the ring into the opposite corner. Full head of steam and in follows O'Hara, stepping up off the middle rope and slamming the knee into the side of the skull! "OOOHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" Vaulting back off the rope, O'Hara encourages Tyler to stagger out and 'come get him some'. Tyler does stagger out, but he doesn't get him some...whatever that actually means...as O'Hara vaults up with a twist, wrapping the legs around the head with a headscissors and snaring The Tremendous One over with a victory roll style cradle... 1... 2... No! STATIC C'mon Robinson! Pick it up! JAX You know he's always had beef wi'J-OH. COLE Well back at School's Out 2005 they were on opposite sides of a tag team match, so you may have somewhat of a point. STATIC Nobody remembers that, shut up. O'Hara looks to be getting a little frustrated with his former adversary and current referee, and takes his frustrations out on Jade Rodez, directing a less than warm comment her way which has the crowd in earshot reeling in shock. It also fires Shayne Brave into climbing up to the apron to take exception, distracting referee Robinson as O'Hara takes advantage by kneeling across Tyler Bryant's throat and attempting to choke the boybander out! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COLE Oh come on, what is this? This is totally illegal, totally immoral... STATIC It's street mentality, Cole! Fuck the rules, whatever means neccessary! Eventually Shayne is convinced to return to the arena floor, where Jade tries to calm her man down. Meanwhile, that allows Robinson to resume his regular duties. And as he notices the choke, he skids across the ring and starts to lay the count on O'Hara. "ONE!" "TWO!" "THREE!" "FOU..." J-OH breaks on four... O'HARA YO STEP OFF! I'LL LAY YOU OUT, YOU AIN'T NOTHIN' TO ME! ...but not without a little verbal abuse for the referee, of course. "TY - LER!" "TY - LER!" "TY - LER!" "TY - LER!" O'Hara jaws with the crowd a little, but that only increases the volume of the pro-D*LUXer chants. Lucky then that O'Hara doesn't really care about fan support, as he brushes off the crowd and proceeds to haul Tyler back to his feet. A quick kick to the gut doubles Tyler over, O'Hara with some more jawjacking before setting and paying homagé to Street Fighter, with a backflip kick reminiscent of Guile... ...except, unless you suck at Street Fighter, Guile usually hits. O'Hara however doesn't as Tyler takes a step back and avoids the feet heading for his face! Backflipping through, O'Hara lands on his feet and aims for the head with a clothesline. But Tyler ducks the arm and as he's sweeping past he reaches up, snatches the head and drives O'Hara down with a Phantom Neckbreaker!! "YYEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!" Both men are down now as "Tremendous" Tyler looks to catch a breather after his Tremendous counter. COLE Tyler Bryant lands the desperation, tide-turning move and right now is about the time he'd usually be looking to get to his corner and tag out. But of course, this is a singles match, so Tyler has to ignore his natural tendancies and recover in the ring rather than in his corner after a tag. The crowd clap along to show their support for Tyler, lead by Jade Rodez in the corner as she slams her fists into the ring apron. "ONE!" Robinson starts to lay a standing ten on the duo meanwhile, as neither shows any significant signs of life. "TWO!" JAX C'mon J', suck it up and fight, man! "THREE!" STATIC Don't worry, he's just resting is all. "FOUR!" Both men are stirring on four as rests have been taken. O'Hara is the first to begin clambering back up but is still feeling the effects of the neckbreaker as he cradles his neck, while Tyler seems to be in the better shape of the two. Referee Robinson calls off the count as Tyler reaches his feet, pulling O'Hara the rest of the way in and to his feet, rocking him with a forearm smash. O'Hara takes the strike and rocks on his heels, managing to keep his vertical base and return the favour with a forearm off his own. *SLAP!* "WHOOOOOOOO!" In retaliation, Tyler fires off a knifedge... *SLAP!* "WHOOOOOOOO!" ...and a second, Jamie's wifebeater not giving him any protection what-so-ever from the strikes. Away stumbles the Hooligan as Tyler follows close... *SLAP!* "WHOOOOOOOO!" ...landing a third chop, to finally fell O'Hara. TYLER C'MOOONN!! "YYEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!" COLE There it is again, you two have really got Tyler fired up. And it's your running buddy that's paying the price right now! STATIC BOYBAND FIYAH~! Excuse me if I ain't concerned. O'Hara stumbles back to his feet and hits reverse, looking for a reprieve as he backs up towards the corner. No reprieve is coming though as Tyler boots him in the gut and shoves him back into the turnbuckles. Again the choice of attack is the right hands, Tyler unleashing a flurry of them on the helpless O'Hara before lifting SuperJay up and setting him in a seated position on the top rope. Firing up the crowd, Tyler then follows O'Hara up and climbs to the top rope in front of The Birmingham Bad Boy, looking for a 'rana. In a desperate spot O'Hara has to find a way to fight out of this position and starts to clip at the knees of Tyler, looking to chop his footing away from him. The boybander tries tenaciously to keep his balance up top. But a firm double shove from O'Hara eventually sends Tyler off the ropes and crashing to the canvas below with a thud! Tyler rolls through somewhat but is still slow up to his feet as Jamie now climbs onto the top rope and sets himself for a dive. Up top, O'Hara calls for a flip...and delivers, soaring off the top with a shooting star... ...INTO A DROPKICK RIGHT TO THE CHEST!!! "OOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" STATIC OOOOOHHHHHHHHHHH!!! O'Hara is propelled backwards by the force of the two feet in his chest, like being shot out of a cannon aimed directly at the turnbuckles behind him, which The Birmingham Bad Boy ends up clattering into!! O'Hara's head ends up whiplashing over the middle rope, while his ribs clattering into the bottom buckle. Even Jade, despite the fact her man has just got himself back into the match, is compelled to turn away in disgust, as the crash test dummy resembling O'Hara is dragged away from the turnbuckles and covered... 1... 2... 3 -NOOOO!! ONLY TWO!! "OOOOOOOHHHHHH!!" COLE Wow! How the hell did Jamie O'Hara kick out after that!? STATIC He's tough, that's how! COLE I get that, but O'Hara flipped right into a dropkick from six or seven feet in the air! And then he hit those turnbuckles so hard he almost become one himself! STATIC Don't matter none. My boy's tough, you can't kill him. However he did it, O'Hara did roll his shoulder before three. Much as Tyler is pained to believe it. Looking as suprised as anyone in the arena, the HI-YAH Tag Team Champion drags O'Hara jelly legs and for that matter his jelly body back off the canvas, having to hold Jamie up by the hair. Scoop by Tyler...and a big slam. Figuring that'll be enough, Tyler makes another pin attempt... 1... 2... No! STATIC Come on man. You ain't gonna beat my man with a scoop slam, please! Tyler seems at a loss for what to do, maybe wishing this were a tag match to bring some new ideas and a fresh body into the ring. That's not the case though, so Tyler drags O'Hara up once more and sends him off the ropes with an irish whip. With his body ravaged O'Hara barely makes it to the ropes, but they shoot him back regardless and he runs back into Tyler, who ducks the head and SNAPS O'Hara over with a Samoan Drop!! Leans back, making the cover... 1... 2... SHOULDER UP!! COLE Again, only two! JAX See, there's the difference. J-OH is real man, he's grown up in the rough neighbourhood, survived on the streets. He ain't manufactured like this greenhorn in the ring with him. STATIC Exactly. He's manufactured as a tag wrestler and when he has to live on his own, without what's been manufactured for him, he's lost in there. COLE I wouldn't say that, Tyler has got O'Hara in the position he's in on his own merits. STATIC But he ain't beat him. Doing her job as manager Jade makes sure to encourage Tyler that everything's okay and not to get frustrated. And taking that on board, the Auburn Hills native stands back, allowing O'Hara time to pull himself back to his feet. As his opponent does just that, Tyler scoops O'Hara up...and over, as O'Hara finds something in reserve and floats over top. Landing behind the boybander, O'Hara grabs a waistlock, more out of desperation than anything else. An elbow from Tyler weakens Jamie up a little, as if it were needed. So O'Hara acts quickly, running Tyler into the ropes and snaring him over with an O'Conner roll... 1... 2... Tyler reaches up and reverses the momentum into his own roll-up... 1... 2... Kickout by O'Hara, who rolls back onto his knees and catches a chance to recover. That chance doesn't last for long however as Tyler wheels around and charges the Englishman, whipping his leg around... ...but O'Hara ducks the Shining Enziguri! Lunging from his knees, O'Hara is able to snare Tyler into an Oklahoma Roll... 1... 2... NO! COLE O'Hara is clearly struggling here, looking for flash roll-ups to try and snatch the victory. JAX You're so bias it's untrue...C'MON J-OH!! Back up and Tyler lands another stinging right hand, dazing O'Hara and buying himself time to measure the next move. Front facelock on, Tyler looks to be setting up for a suplex. O'Hara peppers the kidneys with left hands however, managing to fight The Tremendous One off and look for a counter. Despite the aching ribs, O'Hara sets and frontflips over Tyler's back, keeping hold of the head as he goes and driving Tyler over with a neckbreaker!! JAX YEAH! There we go, who's strugglin' now bitch!? COLE ...Standing Blockbuster. Impressive move. STATIC C'mon Cole, put my boy over a little wouldya? That too much to ask? Remaining seated after the move, O'Hara is sucking wind and therefore he can't follow up, to the relief of Jade and Shayne on the floor as they pound the canvas to encourage Tyler to recover. How that's supposed to help exactly isn't clear, but the thought is there. First to his feet is O'Hara, holding his ribs as he stalks around Tyler and fires off a kick to the head as he approaches his knees. Tyler shakes that off and tries again to clamber up. His reward- another kick. Still Tyler is climbing up though, so O'Hara takes a step back and fires off a basement dropkick across the ear, putting Tyler back down and this time Jamie is able to follow up with a pinfall... 1... 2... No! No question about it now, O'Hara is frustrated. And he takes his frustration out with a blatant choke on Bryant. "ONE!" "TWO!" "THREE!" "FOUR!" "FI..." Breaking the choke, O'Hara swats referee Robinson out of his way and gets flippy again, with a STANDING SHOOTING STAR... ...INTO THE KNEES!!! "OOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHH!!" JAX Aw no! O'Hara is bounced back up off of the knees and clutches at his ribs, as Tyler rolls back to his feet. Underhooking the arm, Tyler takes a hold around the thigh and lifts O'Hara up, bringing him down across a knee with a gutbuster!! COLE One Man Cowell Movement! With O'Hara winded, Tyler shoots the half and cradles him up... 1... 2... NO!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COLE Oh, these fans thought that was it! JAX They don't know the J-OH, he ain't done, not by a longshot! "That's enough" is the cry from Tyler as he backs into the corner, beckoning O'Hara to get to his feet as the crowd rise up behind him. It's not The Gore. It's not The Spear. It's not The Running Hug. It's the Merry Tyler Gore Show, perhaps the greatest pun in the history of the OAOAST and also a move that has finished many men off in the past. And as O'Hara drags his jaded way back up, Tyler comes barrelling out of the corner looking for the spear... ...but O'Hara has it scouted and leapfrogs over top, avoiding the soaring boybander! JAX SEE! STATIC Now slay him, slay him! Skidding on his hands and knees to a halt, the bemused Tyler Bryant spins around and tries another charge. By this time though, Jamie is waiting on him and performs a seamless one and a half rotation in mid-air like some sort of Matrix-man, connecting with a Spinning Gamengiri to the face of The Tremendous One! STATIC That's how we do! That's. How. We. Do! Cover made by O'Hara... 1... 2... KICKOUT! "YYEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHH!!" And this time, O'Hara really can't believe it. COLE Tremendous action here and tremendous resiliancy show by both of these cruiserweights. JAX X-Division. STATIC Oh yeah. That'd be a cool division if there was one. Still favouring his ribs, O'Hara limps back to his feet and waits on Tyler. Boot to the gut from J-OH, looking for an irish whip to follow which isn't happening due to the weight disadvantage and the bad ribs. Tyler simply puts on the brakes and whips the other way, sending Jamie into the turnbuckles. From corner to corner Tyler now charges in after O'Hara...and meets a boot to the face! And a second boot connects, before O'Hara charges out of the corner, into a scoop and the traditional follow-up, the slam, right in position. Exiting the ring, Tyler slaps the top turnbuckle and indicates he's going up. STATIC Does that rope look loose to you JJ? JAX A lil'. Maybe we oughta take a closer look. STATIC For safety. JAX Yeah. COLE Hey wait a minute, where are you go... Throwing down their headsets, The GPX are fooling no-one as they jog around ringside...AND GET CUT OFF BY SHAYNE BRAVE! "YYEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!" It's a pier-three brawl on the floor as Brave looks to fight The GPX off on the floor, gaining the attention of everyone. Including Tyler, who is perched up top and distracted by his tag team partner's predicament. However, O'Hara isn't quite so distracted, reaching up and YANKING Tyler off the ropes by his long, boyband hair, down HARD into the canvas!! COLE Damnit, the distraction costs Tyler Bryant. Tyler ends up knocked stupid, allowing O'Hara to drag him around into position and head up top, with a clear signal. 6. 3. 0. The climb up the ropes is slow and painful, but O'Hara perseveres and makes it up top. Balancing on the buckles, O'Hara then looks for some more flip-dippery, flipping through an always jaw-dropping six hundred and thirty degrees... ...AND LANDS RIGHT ACROSS TYLER'S STERNUM!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COLE AMAZING move, but damnit this isn't right! Clutching his ribs, O'Hara lounges backwards and Robinson drags himself away from the brawl on the floor long enough to drop down and count the fall... 1... 2... 3!!!! *DINGDINGDING!* Abruptly the brawl on the floor ends, with Brave fending off The GPX long enough to roll into the ring but not soon enough to save his partner from defeat. Static and Jax quickly drag O'Hara out of the ring, helping their wounded team-mate up the ramp as "I'm A Hustla" sounds out once more. BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, your winner of this contest... JAMIE... O'HHAAAAAARRAAAAAA!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COLE Well, I'm not sure if you'd consider it a completely clean victory, but Jamie O'Hara scores the victory regardless. The GPX certainly played their part. And rather than earning a measure of revenge for last week, it's another night of frustration for D*LUX as The Hooligans again embarrass them on national T.V!

I was thinking the tag match idea, yes. Either, or. Then the spare two can maybe find something else for the show, or we can just have them sit it out, depending on who the spare two are. We could also have it be Usual Suspects vs. Cortez and Bloodshed, especially if certain titles might be involved. Whatever the best use of writers is I guess.

Well, World Without End is the Elimination Chamber show, right? Was it last year? Maybe I'm mistaken. One suggestion, mainly for Zack; Alf goes ahead with the Chamber at WWE and we hold off on War Games for a few more weeks. At WWE, we can fit in some more matches with everyone involved in War Games. Then, late October, we have another Syndicated, one which I'll do the running off like Tony did and Adam was supposed to do. I've only ever posted one show, I'd like to do another. So long as people understand it being later than usual because of time differences. Main event of Syndicated would be War Games, we'd fit in a couple more matches from other and we can probably get away with writing a longer War Games without ending up with a ridiculously long PPV. Yay? Nay?

London/Kendrick? Interview? Wow. Only 2/3 months late, but still.

Well, time to quit being carried I guess.

I like Nigel just fine, but I don't see him as ROH Champion. I still say this Title Unification deal is a way of making people believe Nigel has a shot of winning the title in his home country, only for Dragon to go over.

Seeing as we're doing this early... Tyler Bryant vs. Jamie O'Hara

COLE Welcome back to HeldDOWN~!, where right now it's all change at Sofa Central. Coach has gone to refill the popcorn bowls and I'm instead joined by two very familiar faces, The Global Party Exchange, here to impart their knowledge of tag team wrestling during this HI-YAH Tag Team Championship Match. Hopefully we won't get taken off the air mid-way through, but if we do you can continue watching on OAOAST.com. JAX Hasn't that site been down for like 2 years? STATIC Wait, we had one to begin with? COLE [shifty eyes] So, uh, as we said HI-YAH Tag Team Championship on the line. The Champions D*LUX make their first defence of the belts in their second reign, as they take on the OAOAST's perrenial hired hitmen, The South Central Militia. And this will be by no means be an easy test for the Champs. STATIC Let's hope they've been watchin' those best of GPX DVDs a little closer this week. "JUST ONE ON ONE THAT'S THE WAY WE DO IT BABY! JUST ONE ON ONE, THAT'S THE WAY WE DO IT! JUST ONE ON ONE THAT'S THE WAY WE DO IT BABY! JUST ONE ON ONE, THAT'S THE WAY WE DO IT!" That intro to A1's "First To Believe", can only mean one thing. And painful as the song it leads into may be the crowd rise to their feet regardless for the hot slice of pop about to be dished out. Jade Rodez is first to emerge, skipping out through the entrance doors with a typically angellic smile on her face. Either side, "Showtime" Shayne Brave and "Tremendous" Tyler Bryant hit a triumphant pose of their manager, their washboard abs hidden to the world by the fancy HI-YAH Tag Straps back in their possession. Jade and team soak up the energy of the crowd for a few seconds before Jade points the way on to the ring. And like the good tag team they are, Shayne and Tyler do as told and bound on down the ramp. COLE Alright! D*LUX, tagging hands like it's going out of fashion! STATIC So, kinda like their gimmick then? BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen the following tag team contest is scheduled for one fall and it is for the HI-YAH World Tag Team Championships! Introducing first, being accompanied to the ring by their manager, Ms. JADE RODEZ! Both hailing from the state of Michigan. At a total combined weight of three hundred and ninety seven pounds... "SHOWTIME" SHAYNE... "TREMENDOUS" TYLER... the two-time, current, reigning and defending HI-YAH World Tag Team Champions... D * LLLLLLLLLUUUUUUUUUUUUXXXXXXXXXXX!!!!! "YYEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" JAX Bah gawd Johnny Jam, wouldya look at these two young bluechippers? Hailin' from the heart of Michigan... STATIC So, in other words, Canada. JAX Watch your mouth, brah. Hand-slapping their way down the ramp, Tyler and Shayne climb to the apron and hoist Jade from the floor as has become customary. The trio then enter the ring, which is when The GPX's presence at ringside gets their attention. The 2/3rds of the 6-Man Tag Team Champions stand from the sofa, as Jade tries to drag D*LUX away from the ropes. STATIC These two dawgs, they're loaded with potential! But you ain't gonna pay the bills on potential alone, Johnny Jam. Maybe that's why they took a surefire earner, stole it and gave it a 21st Century twist... JAX 20th Century. STATIC ...and pretended like they're something special! And that's what this business was built on. Tyler and Shayne are still distracted by The GPX's commentary, good enough lip-readers to know they're being run down. And even the sounds of "Don't Believe The Hype" by Public Enemy don't draw their attention away from Johnny and Scotty. The entrance doors part and out stride The South Central Militia. Already The SCM are disposing of their shades and bandanas and the like, as they see and opportunity and stride to the ring with a little more eagerness than usual. BUFFER And introducing the challengers. Hailing from South Central L.A... at a total combined weight of five hundred and two pounds. MARCELLUS "ONE EYE" WALLACE... VINCENT "WHITEY" FORD... THE SOUTH CENTRAL MILLLIIITTIIIIIAAAAAA!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Announcement over, Buffer makes a quick exit as Vinny slides into the ring. And despite Jade's warnings D*LUX don't turn in time, getting jumped from behind by Vinny as Marcellus labours behind a little but now joins his parter in the ring. Jade wisely makes a quick exit, as The SCM begin to club away on D*LUX to the amusement of The GPX. *DINGDINGDING!* COLE From behind, The Militia get the jump on the Champions! STATIC Aw, too bad. I guess these two got too caught up lookin' in this livin' mirror here. Immediately, the LA duo's weight advantage comes into play as D*LUX, still yet to remove their denim green jackets or even their title belts are overwhelmed by the challengers. The SCM dump Shayne from the ring before loading Tyler up for a double whip. As Tyler rebounds, Marcellus steps aside briefly as Vinny cuts the boybander off with a boot to the gut, doubling him over as Moe then returns with a knee strike to the side of the head! The strike almost twists "The Tremendous One" inside out as The SCM bump knuckles in a show of team unity. Off comes the jacket now as Vinny drags Tyler up again, whipping him over the back with his very own denim clothing while Marcellus bundles Shayne back off the apron. Back in centre ring, Vinny hooks Tyler down with a clothesline and grabs a quick pin... 1... 2... Kickout. By the hair, "Whitey" drags Tyler up again and hooks him down with a second, more measured clothesline. The veteran of the team then calls Marcellus over and holds Tyler in place, as ol' "One Eye" lands a skull crushing headbutt! SANTANA L.A REPRESENT!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" STATIC Yeah, nice going there hotshot. The crowd are unsurprisingly unreceptive to Vinny's yell. The SCM seem a little distracted by the boos and can't resist talking some trash in return, as is their brash nature. However, because the fans aren't in the ring they end up taking their attention away from their opponents, as Shayne Brave is back up on the apron. Despite having one good eye, Moe is the first to spot Shayne and alerts Vinny to the problem. But as they move towards "Showtime", he vaults to the top and springboards in with a crossbody...CAUGHT! The SCM collectively catch Brave in their arms, preparing to drop him. Or throw him. Pity they can't make their mind up, really. Especially as it gives time for Tyler to stoop through the gap and hit the ropes in front, dropkicking his partner in the back, causing The Militia to topple and Shayne to land on top, sending Jade jumping for joy... 1... 2... NO! Double kickout, with authority, which abruptly stops Jade's jumping. JAX Damn, Leon's sister's really filled out since we first met her. STATIC Too true. If she looked like that back then, I'd'a gave her a lil' Static shock treatment, ya dig? JAX Wasn't she like 16 then? COLE Guys, please! Try to concentrate on the match. Regrouping, D*LUX catch Vinny getting to his feet with a double dropkick, sending him sprawling to the floor. That leaves Marcellus 2 on 1 against the tag team specialists, who look for the same attack again. Marcellus is a bigger man than his partner though and he takes the dropkick with little more than a step back. D*LUX try again and again Marcellus doesn't go down, but he's clearly staggered. So D*LUX perservere and fire off stereo enziguris, to finally knock Moe down! "YYEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHH!" Finally referee Mark Hebner orders one in and one out, Shayne electing to leave while Tyler takes Moe over with an Oklahoma Roll... 1... 2... Kickout. Tyler traps on a side headlock to keep Moe under control. Or, as best possible with the near sixty pound weight difference. COLE D*LUX finally taking some control now. STATIC D*LUX. Man, could they be more obvious about it? They oughta be called ONI, Originality Not Included. JAX Or GTG. Grand Theft Gimmick. STATIC Nah, that's a little too current for 'em. Tag is made between D*LUX as they look to whip Marcellus off the ropes. The bigman is taken across the ring by the combined efforts of the boyband sensations, but he comes barrelling right back with a double clothesline. D*LUX double duck though, grabbing Moe from behind and hitting a double russian legsweep. Off the ropes comes Shayne as Tyler positions himself, backdropping his partner up and down across Wallace. Cover is made, as Hebner points Tyler out of the ring... 1... 2... Kickout. Knowing that he can't stand toe to toe with "One Eye", Shayne rushes over to the corner and hops up to the middle rope, waiting on Marcellus to get back up. The bigman of the match wanders in and takes a WICKED~! right hand to the jaw that'd have even Logan Mann wincing! Shayne then reaches out and hooks the head, ready for a Tornado DDT... ...but he gets caught coming off the rope and pitched forward... ...only to land on his feet and connect with a front dropkick as Moe wanders towards him. Marcellus stumbles back into the corner and Shayne backs up into the opposite corner, getting a run-up as he charges in and soars, squashing Moe in the corner with a leaping elbow. That leaves Moe staggered, long enough for D*LUX to make another quick exchange. STATIC Tag in to Johnny Jax. COLE Tyler Bryant. STATIC Same diff'. Makeshift planning is made on Tyler's way in as he extends his hand, allowing Shayne to whip him in. Marcellus has recovered by now though and avoids the splash in the corner! Tyler ends up slumped in the corner as "Showtime" Shayne now runs in and he gets turned virtually inside out with a massive, powerhouse of a clothesline! "OOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" JAX :D COLE What a clothesline! JAX Oh ho, you ain't kiddin'! Man that was great, you got flipped right over Scotty!! STATIC And how. Can I get some ice out here for my neck or somethin', that's gonna smart in the morning. Out from the corner staggers Tyler now. Jade tries to wave him off, frantically trying to warn Tyler not to turn around and to his credit he doesn't. Trouble is, he keeps stumbling backwards and falls into the waiting arms of "One Eye", Marcellus hooking the left arm around the head from behind as he extends the thumb on his right hand to the crowd. Moe then cuts the thumb across his throat...and JAMS it into the side of Tyler's throat!! Tyler collapses in a fitting heap and chokes for breath, while Marcellus is warned by the referee for what may or may not have been an illegal strike. There's enough area of doubt that Hebner doesn't actually call the disqualification though. COLE He calls that the Silver Bullet. STATIC I call that move theft! Is there anyone else in this damn company who ain't rippin' anyone else off, besides us and J'OH? JAX Hey joo! Mah name... haha!... eesss JJJOOOHNNYYY... haha!... STATIC Cut it out J. JAX Just as well. I don't think I oughta break one of these 'cigars' I gots. COLE Did Coachman sell you them? On seconds thoughts, nevermind. By now, Marcellus has made the tag and Vincent Santana is in. Tyler is still writhing on the canvas so with no sign of his tag team partner around to make the save, Vinny decides to attempt a pin... 1... 2... Shoulder up! Vinny brings Tyler back up, whilst on the outside Jade is doing her managerial duties by checking on Shayne Brave's condition. She keeps a nervous eye on the ring though, as Vinny nails Tyler with a right hand. A second. Three. And a fourth, sending Tyler slumping back into a neutral corner. A wring of the arm sets up and irish whip from Santana, sending Tyler cross-ring and into the opposite buckles with a thud. Vinny then charges in on the follow-up...and eats two feet to the face! Shaking it off, the man affectionately known as "Whitey" tries again...running into another raised boot! Hope is built up for the crowd as Tyler now exits the corner and swings for Santana. But Vinny ducks his head and catches Tyler, hoiking him up and throwing him down with a modified Rock Bottom! COLE The Throwdown! STATIC Gee, that's an original statement. Looking disturbingly natural, Vinny drags the motionless body by the feet into the position he wants, before exiting to the apron. Hooking the top rope, the deceptively agile Santana then flips back in with a hílo, driving his bodyweight down across the chest. Cover is made, Vinny hooking the near leg... 1... 2... But the far leg finds it's way onto the bottom rope! "YYEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!" STATIC Hey Johnny, you wanna pull a run-in? COLE :O JAX Nah, I'm good. COLE You two are unbelievable. The SCM make an exchange now and Marcellus is now the legal man again. Together the Militia ignore Hebner's protests and his 5 count, teaming up to shoot Tyler into the ropes and elevating him up onto the shoulders. Together. In unison, the duo then flip Tyler off the shoulders and down with a Double FU! COLE Not just an FU...but a DOUBLE FU! JAX Yeesh. Out exits Vinny, confidently dusting his hands on sight of Marcellus' relaxed pinfall... 1... 2... SAVE BY SHAYNE! The hotheaded Wallace chases Brave out of the ring, Hebner having to keep the duo seperated, which allows Vinny to sneak into the ring and put the boots to Tyler in the meantime. "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COLE If Tyler doesn't soon make the tag, then you two might find yourselves with a different target of abuse, because D*LUX might not be HI-YAH Tag Team Champions for much longer. STATIC It ain't about belts, it's about respect! I don't give a shit who's holding what belt, this is a matter of pride. Saving face. We've got gold, we're not beggin' for more. That crap's for glorywhores. COLE ...and we at the OAOAST apologise for that language folks. JAX Why? It's not like the 'Pres' is gonna watch this, he's too busy working him and his millionaire busboys a payrise somewheres. COLE Oh man. Control seems to have been retained, as Brave is sent back to his corner and watches on anxiously. Scooping Tyler up, Wallace slams the Auburn Hills native in the centre of the ring. Moe then backs off the ropes and leaps high, coming down with a big elbow, which stays over Tyler's chest... 1... 2... Kickout! "TY - LER!" "TY - LER!" "TY - LER!" "TY - LER!" Marcellus now looks for the end, setting himself in a front headscissors to allow himself to lift Tyler up, back to belly. In near certain peril either way he goes, Tyler panics and starts to squirm and struggle, Marcellus hanging onto the legs at the top despite the endeavour of the youngster. So Tyler slams his feet together, sandwiching Moe's head between. A second sandwich has Moe's bell rung. And a third time finally stuns Marcellus enough for Tyler to slip down the back, trying for a sunset flip. But he isn't strong enough to bring the 265 pounder down without assistance, so Shayne Brave rushes in and dropkicks the off-balance Wallace, dropping him back into the sunset flip... 1... 2... NO! Rolling back through to his feet, Tyler is nimble enough to duck underneath a sprawling attempt by Marcellus to snare him, hitting the ropes behind and chopblocking out one of "One Eye" knees, almost turning him into "One Leg" in the process. Santana tries to get in for the save, but Tyler cuts him off halfway through the ropes, dropkicking him to the floor. With the adrenalin still flowing, Tyler then wheels around and launches off of Marcellus' planted leg... *SMACK!* ...and nailing him behind the head with a Shining Enziguri!! "YYEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" COLE There's the turnaround and now, Tyler Bryant has to make the tag to his fresh partner! JAX What's he gonna do? He's about a buck seventy, how's he gonna beat this big dude? STATIC With whatever we beat him with last, probably. "TY - LER!" "TY - LER!" "TY - LER!" "TY - LER!" The crowd rise to route Tyler towards a tag as the adrenaline has faded a little, forcing him to wearily crawl hand over foot to his corner. Brave is waiting with tag rope in hand, arm outstretched as Tyler crawls, crawls and crawls some more...AND GETS THE TAG! "YYEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" STATIC Hot tag! JAX Did we invent that? STATIC Probably. Faster than you can say house en fuego (which probably isn't that fast come to think of it), Shayne leaps into the ring and comes down across Marcellus' back with a back senton! Shayne pops right back up and like a lime green blur he fends off Vinny with a baseball slide, before scrambling out the rest of the way through the middle and bottom ropes, heading towards the top. Marcellus drags himself back up and Shayne soars, connecting with a missile dropkick that fells the mighty (proverbial) tree! On top scrambles "Showtime"... 1... 2... Santana clubs Shayne from behind, breaking the pin... *SMACK!* ...earning him a Yakuza Kick from Tyler Bryant! "YYEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!" JAX Hmm, who does that remind ya'll of? STATIC I'll take Johnny Jax for $300. COLE Lots of people use the Yakuza Kick, I really doubt he took it specifically from you. D*LUX now regroup and wait on Marcellus to get back to his feet, Tyler meeting him with a quick kick to the gut. Together Shayne and Tyler grab an arm each wring them out, kicking the legs out from underneath Moe and dropping him to his knees. Shayne and Tyler then hit the ropes on either side and fire off basement dropkicks in stereo, sandwiching Moe's head in between. COLE New Kicks On The Block! 1... 2... 3- NO! COLE I get the feeling D*LUX would be better off focusing on Santana. They're going to have a tough time keeping "One Eye" down, even with 2 on 1 offence, for the pinfall and I doubt they'll get a submission out of him. Shayne now keeps Vinny in check as Tyler crouches, waiting on Marcellus to collect himself before running the ropes. On the way back Marcellus catches Tyler under the arms and pitches him high into the air with little to no effort. Tyler is able to adjust in mid-air and counter with a dropkick, but pretty much bounces off Moe without dropping him to the canvas. Another head of steam is built though and the persistant Tyler Bryant charges at Moe...who backdrops him high over the top and to the arena floor! "OOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" Soon to follow is Moe though, Shayne catching him unawares with a dropkick and managing to bundle him over the top and to the floor. That leaves just Shayne and Vinny in the ring and that seems a slightly fairer match... *SMACK!* "OOOOOOHHHHHHHHHH!" ...save for the fact Shayne gets his lights kicked out as he turns around, of course. COLE Superkick by Vincent Santana! Where did he pull that from? Learning from previous mistakes, Vinny drags Shayne away from the ropes before calling Hebner down and demanding the count... 1... 2... NEW CHA... NO, KICKOUT! "YYEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!" The kickout has Jade leaping for joy again, but it sucks the energy right out of Santana as he argues the count with referee Hebner. But he doesn't stay deterred for too long, backing into a corner and slapping his forearm for all to see. COLE Vinny's looking for that flying forearm, a move made famous by another wrestling Santana back in the day. STATIC Yeah, but he didn't have no steel plates in his forearm. JAX That was that other guy, right? STATIC Heh. We can't even have original injuries around here. Watch him tear his quad. Vinny revs up the car, preparing for the Drive-By. Worried for her team, Jade tries to plead with Hebner that "Whitey" is about to use a foreign object and to do something about it. The pleading is futile though, as Vinny points a finger down her way and yelling at her to shut up before she gets hurt, before turning and charging... ...right in a Merry Tyler Gore Show, Bryant flipping over into the customary jacknife pin as Hebner dives into position... 1... 2... Shayne cuts off Marcellus... AND THERE'S THE 3!!! "YYEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" *DINGDINGDING!* COLE A desperation save, turned into a pin and it gets D*LUX the victory! Vincent didn't see it coming! BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, your winners... and STILL HI-YAH World Tag Team Champions, "Showtime" Shayne and "Tremendous" Tyler... D * LLLLLLLLUUUUUUUUUUXXXXXXXXXX!!!! "YYEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" In the ring Tyler and Shayne high-five and embrace like good team-mates should, as Jade rushes to ringside to collect the HI-YAH Tag Titles for her team. But when she gets there, the timekeeper's table is strangely empty. Standing on the HeldDOWN~! sofa, smug smiles appear on the faces of Scotty Static and Johnny Jax as they raise D*LUX's HI-YAH Tag Team Title belts for the crowd to see. Jax teases Jade with the belt he's holding, dangling it within reach if she dares to try and take it. Meanwhile, D*LUX finally spot what's going on and look to each other in confusion. COLE Come on guys, what are you doing!? STATIC Great win dawgs...but you won them under false pretences, didnt'cha. By rights, these are ours. JAX You want 'em...come get 'em! Luckily, Tyler is a good lip-reader and he relays what The GPX just said over their headsets to Shayne before bailing from the ring... ...not expecting his partner to collapse behind him, as JAMIE O'HARA skids into the ring and clocks Shayne in the back of the head with his third of the 6-Man Tag Team Championships!! Tyler hears the reaction of the crowd, which is strangely mixed, and turns around to see what happened. And that's when The GPX pounce, scrambling over the announce table and pounding Tyler from behind!! COLE HEY! Come on, what the hell!? Static and Jax puts the boots to Tyler, before pitching him into the ring, where O'Hara is laying the icecreams down on Shayne. Watching on helplessly, Jade screams to the back for some help, but none seems to be coming as The Hooligans continue to beat down on D*LUX with stomps and kicks and the odd forearm here and there. Tossing off his doo-rag, O'Hara then exits to the apron and gives some signals to The GPX, Static continuing the stomps as Jax drags Shayne Brave across towards the corner. O'Hara quickly scales to the top and stands tall, showing off his nonchalant, natural balance while Jax places one of the HI-YAH Tag Titles across Brave's head. O'Hara gives the thumbs up, before backflipping off and landing an awesome SHOOTING STAR LEGDROP across the face!!! COLE Da Bling Thing! "YYEEEEEAAAAHHHHH - BOOOOOO!" COLE Damnit, this is completely uncalled for! D*LUX have done nothing to provoke this, Johnny Jax and Scotty Static seem to have this chip on their damn shoulders about the 'old' GPX and this is the result! And they're not even done! With Shayne KOed and bleeding from the belt being smushed into his face, The Hooligans now focus their attentions on Tyler Bryant. Dragging the match-winning D*LUXer up to his feet, Static locks on a double underhook, O'Hara nursing his tailbone but still encouraging his 6-Man Tag partner on, as he lifts Tyler up...and DRILLS him with the Spiked Punch!!! "OOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" COLE Ugh! Right on his head. D*LUX just came through a tough title defence and now this. With D*LUX laid to waste, the kneeling Static smirks as he accepts the other HI-YAH Title from Jax and drops it over Tyler's body. O'Hara mocks the despairing Jade Rodez from the ring, the crueller parts of the audience laughing along with him, while "Make Her Say" hits and The GPX stand over the supposed successors to their former boyband throne.

I'm no history buff, but I've been here 3 years and I certainly wouldn't be surprised to learn that Madrac the wrestling giraffe had been done before. Certainly sounds like something we'd do.

I still love the Walters/Rave match where Walters keeps Rave in the Sharpshooter on the floor until 19, enters the ring and retains the title. I miss Walters.

Hogan vs. Orndorff from SNME. The two escaping the Cage at the same time was a neat finish, even if it always seemed a little dubious. But at least leave a little vagueness to it. To say they landed at the exact same millisecond was a little far-fetched.

Angle vs. Sabu might be an interesting match if they weren't both carrying near-crippling injuries. Which without the aid of a time machine would never really have been possible.