King Cucaracha

Ditto Balls.

They have trades for that iggy. I think the reason for all the main event switches is so they can A) get a big pop, obviously...but B) to get guys they value like Cena and Benoit swapped before the trades, so they seem like big acquisitions, rather than just guys Bischoff/Long didn't want. Which is exactly why I see Jericho traded instead of drafted.

Updated List: [2000 SS16 Winner] CHRIS HERO [2004 TPI Winner] "The Phenomenal" AJ STYLES JAMES GIBSON "Wonderkid" JONNY STORM ROBBIE BROOKSIDE "The Product" MAREK BRAVE TYLER BLACK "American Dragon" BRYAN DANIELSON "The Notorious 187" HOMICIDE "Lightning" MIKE QUACKENBUSH SUPER DRAGON "Mr Wrestling" KEVIN STEEN RAINMAN MATT SYDAL

Well, there might be a problem, seeing as I plan to retire in the next year. HI-YOOOOOOOO~! [/meant in jest, please do not launch tirade]

Or do it the other way around? Cena is in the ring talking about how he's the #1 guy in the business and then Batista's music hits... ...oh wait, they changed Batista's theme and gave him new generic rock. Yeah, your scenario is better. Batista's music isn't all that different to his old one, having listened to it over. It's a generic, nu-metal version, but they didn't exactly 'change' it. Wow, that was a pretty insignificant point. Uhm...hopefully, they don't rape Smackdown's roster much more. I'm really worried Eddie's going to show up on RAW at some point, after the way Smackdown ended last week. And if that's what they're planning, then Guerrero runs the risk of completely getting lost in the shuffle, where-as now he's had the opportunity and most importantly time to build his heel character up again on Smackdown. I'm also worried they'll be sending JBL other, which again takes away a big part of Smackdown.

That'd rock. Pie Matches all 'round. In other news, I've PMed Tom and hopefully everything's all cool now. I was stupid, he said fuck a lot, everyone had a laugh and a drink and possibly something stronger, then we all went home and forgot this ever happened. Right?

EDIT: Nevermind. Probably in enough shit as it is.

And just for the record, one of my matches isn't actually a match because I ran out of time. So I had to change my plans and come up with something else. Ironically, only so I could get my stuff in on time. So to say I'm, like NYU, not all that happy...would be a slight understatement.

BTW, this should go after Blonde/Wright. So it's Blonde/Wright first, this cop-out afterwards.

We return to The Great Angle Bash, just in time, as the strains of AC/DC's "Back In Black" kick in. Already the crowd are booing as the monstrous Bohemoth steps through the curtains, closely followed by a showered and re-clothed Christian Wright. Stopping on the stage, Bohemoth flexes TEH GUNZ~! before walking on down the ramp..ready for the biggest match of his life. *DINGDING!* BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, your following contest is scheduled for one fall...and it is for the HI-YAH HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPIONSHIP! Introducing first, accompanied to the ring by Christian Wright! From Greenville, South Carolina. He weighs in at two hundred and eighty four pounds...and is the NEEEWW~ HI-YAH HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION OF THE WOOOORRRLLLDD... BOOOOOOOOO - HHHEEEEEEEEMMMMOOOOOTTHHHHH!!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Jogging up the steps, Bohemoth enters the ring and ROARS~ with intensity before removing his newly won title belt and displaying it for the crowd. COLE Well, after the display we saw earlier from these two men, we can only hope things will be different here. Of course, Christian Wright cannot come into physical contact with Leon Rodez, or vice versa, or he will be fired...so, hopefully, we can go without incident here. CABOOSE Famous last words. Bohemoth begins to jog on the spot as Wright stares down the rampway, beckoning the challenger on. "LE - ON!" "LE - ON!" "LE - ON!" "LE - ON!" BUFFER And...HIS OPPONENT! *GOOOOONG!* "YEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!" "GET DOWN, GET DOWN! GET DOWN, GET DOWN! GET DOWN, GET DOWN! GET DOWN, GET DOWN! GET DOWN, GET DOWN! GET DOWN, GET DOWN! GET DOWN, GET DOWN! GET DOWN, GET DOWN!" The crowd groove along to the sounds of Kool And The Gang's "Jungle Boogie", looking to the entrance way in aniticipation... ...nothing. COLE This is of course Leon Rodez's first match back on Pay Per View since his injury. And he has a very good record in the past year, since his PPV debut at last year's Great Angle Bach. Especially in title matches. COACH Well, where is he? COLE I...don't know. CABOOSE Best keep an eye out behind us. He's probably trying to ambush Bohemoth from through the crowd. But, there's no movement in the crowd. There's no reaction to a sneaky Rodez. There's nothing. Michael Buffer looks confused as "Jungle Boogie" fades out, leaving Bohemoth and Wright standing in the ring and still waiting for the Silky Smooth One. Eventually, as there's still no sign of Leon, the referee converses with Buffer. "LE - ON!" "LE - ON!" "LE - ON!" "LE - ON!" COLE I think they're going to announce him again here. This crowd certainly want Leon Rodez out here...and so do we. BUFFER And...HIS OPPONENT! *GOOOOONG!* "YEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!" "GET DOWN, GET DOWN! GET DOWN, GET DOWN! GET DOWN, GET DOWN! GET DOWN, GET DOWN! GET DOWN, GET DOWN! GET DOWN, GET DOWN! GET DOWN, GET DOWN! GET DOWN, GET DOWN!" The crowd watch on in unison towards the curtains, in hope as much as expectation. But still, there's nothing. A few of the fans are catching on and begin booing at the thought of a no-show. COLE What...backstage? Well, go ahead...we're being told to take you backstage... Before the boos can become widespread though, the AngleTron flickers and suddenly, we get a view of the backstage area. A lone cameraman is rushing through the hallways of the arena, sounding pretty out of breath. Passing through another corridor and rounding and corner, the cameraman bursts through two metal doors and into the parking lot. Immediatly, the commotion is evident as a group of people are crowded around one spot in the centre of the parking lot. The intrepid cameraman begins to barge through, past various OAOAST superstars and staff who are watching on, before leaning in over the scene, to the person being checked on by EMTs. But they're not crowded around Leon Rodez. But Jade Rodez. CABOOSE Well, I guess that explains where Leon is...can we...do we know what happened? Jade is conscious back has a neck-brace on and is clearly in some discomfort. Amongst the group standing around, Leon Rodez is hovering over his sister. The EMTs are just now manouevering Jade onto a backboard, Leon beginning to pace as his gaze seems to be darting between the direction of ringside and his clearly injured sister. Meanwhile, Jade, is now on a stretcher and being elevated up to be wheeled towards the ambulance wailing off screen. Carefully, the stretcher is loaded into the ambulance, with Leon Rodez not far behind. TERRY TAYLOR Leon...Leon, there you are. Look, they've been waiting for you fo...what the hell happened? Late on the scene, OAOAST Road Agent Terry Taylor has finally arrived. Leon completely ignores him though. TAYLOR ...uhm...they're waiting for you out in the ring. Again, Leon blanks Taylor. TAYLOR Leon, they're waiting. Come on, man! LEON You know what, I don't care. So I'll tell you what, Rooster...why don't you cluck off, eh? Leon's candid response takes Taylor a little by surprise and before he can reply, Leon has strode off and is clambouring into the back of the ambulance with his sister. The doors slam shut behind Leon and soon after, the ambulance screeches off. Leaving Terry Taylor wondering what the hell is going on. Meanwhile, back in the arena, Wright and Bohemoth have watched the entire thing on the big screen. And seem surprisingly surprised at what's happened. Everyone looks completely confused, as Buffer is again in conversation with the referee. A conversation which Christian Wright is now heavily involved in. COLE Well, obviously, the well-being of Jade Rodez is paramount to her brother. But...what are we going to do for a HI-YAH Heavyweight Title Match now? It seems Michael Cole isn't the only one who wants to know the answer to that question, as Wright is still talking with the referee, who is still trying to relay something to Buffer. Finally, Buffer steps back into the centre of the ring, as the hushed crowd...stay hushed. BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen...your...your winner of this match...via forfeit. And still HI-YAH Heavyweight Champion of the world...BOHEMOTH! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" The crowd are incensed as Bohemoth doesn't seem too happy at having no competition. Wright meanwhile slaps Bo's HI-YAH Title with a wry smile, as if pleased his man retained the title in the manner which he had. The two then leave the ring, walking up the ramp as the boos continue. COACH That was a cop-out. CABOOSE That was even worse than the Grand Prix. COLE And I'll give you two guesses as to who's responsible for it! CABOOSE Wait, you're not accussing Wright and Bohemoth, are you? COLE Damn right I am! You heard what Wright said earlier, about everyone who's around Leon Rodez 'purging for his sins'. I wouldn't put it past Christian Wright to have attacked that poor, defenceless girl. I wouldn't put it past him at all.

As we return to ringside, the arena abruptly goes dark, save for a single white spotlight that shines at the top of the ramp. The haunting sounds of Radiohead's "Creep" begins to filter through the arena, to boos from the crowd. COLE We are ready for more action here at the Great Angle Bash...with Christian Wright, in only his second OAOAST match, taking on James Blonde. And we can only hope this match is more competitive than his previous outing, against Igor Stoyanovich. CABOOSE I'm not holding my breath. COLE With all due respect, James Blonde is an actual trained wrestler, unlike Igor. CABOOSE That's debatable. Just as the lyrics begin, Christian Wright emerges through the curtains. But he's not alone, as the monstrous silohuette of Bohemoth emerges at his side. He stops in the spotlight, head bowed, waiting as the boos intensify around him. [i]"I wish I was special..." "You're so very special..." *DRN-UN* *DRN-UN* "But I'm a Creep!!"[/i] Right on cue, Christian bursts into life. Down comes the hood of his flowing robe, a focused look on his face as he begins to stride down the aisle, with Bohemoth following on behind. On route, Wright disposes of his robe, while Bohemoth keeps an eye out behind for any un-expected attacks. After all, he is a bodyguard. BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, your following contest is scheduled for one fall, with a fifteen minute time-limit. Introducing first...accompanied to the ring by his bodyguard, Bohemoth! From Raleigh, North Carolina...weighing in at two hundred, thirty three pounds... "THE NATURAL"... CCHHHRRRRIIISSSSTTIIIIAAAAAANN... WWRRRRRRIIIIIIGGHHHHHTT!!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Rolling into the ring, Wright holds his arms in the air, completely ignoring the jeers from the crowd. Bohemoth watches on the from outside, HI-YAH Championship over his shoulder. COLE I'm surprised to see Bohemoth out here, considering he's got the biggest match of his life upcoming. CABOOSE So, what, as soon as someone wins a belt, they have to be completely selfish? COLE No, but... CABOOSE Bohemoth is a loyal bodyguard to Christian Wright. Of course he's going to be at ringside when Christian has a match. Especially with Leon Rodez around... COACH Yeah, but Rodez can't touch Wright, or vice-versa. CABOOSE Exactly. If Rodez decides to come out here and distract Wright, he can't do anything about it...but Bohemoth can. The Natural is now in conversation with referee Mark Hebner, finger pointed right into the face of the official before pointing back towards the locker room. The word 'Rodez' can clearly been seen mouthed in the middle of the tirade. As meanwhile, "Spirit In The Sky" by Norman Greenbaum has hit and James Blonde has made his way out onto the stage. Anxious to get going, Blonde jigs about on the spot, while Faqu limps out behind him, flanking his tag team partner. BUFFER And his opponent...accompanied to the ring by Faqu! From Vancouver, British Columbia and weighing two hundred, one pounds... JAAAAAAMMEEEEEEEESSSSS... BBLLLLOOOOOOONNDDEEEEEEE!!! Introduction over, Blonde switches into top gear and SPRINTS~ to the ring, sliding the full length of the mat...and gets a boot in the back of the head for his troubles! COLE Aw, come on. A cheap-shot straight away! *DING DING DING!* Hebner hurriedly calls for the bell as Wright continues to stomp Blonde down with each attempt at trying to get back up. Eventually, Blonde shimmies over to grab the bottom rope, forcing Hebner to move in. Wright backs off, allowing Blonde to pull himself up. Only to attack as soon as Blonde reaches his fee, clubbing him with repeated forearms before sending him off the ropes. Blonde rebounds as Wright ducks his head, looking for a backbody drop. Blonde sees it coming though, leapfrogging over The Natural and running on. Confused, Wright lumbers around, as Blonde suddenly sprints off the ropes and smashes CW between the eyes with a running forearm! Quickly Wright staggers up and gets caught with an armdrag. And a second. Followed up with a dropkick that sends Wright rolling out of the ring and the fans into a frenzy! CABOOSE 'The hell!?! COLE I'm telling you Caboose, you shouldn't count out James Blonde. This kid has heart. And a lot of hunger. Looking to be completely caught off guard, Wright stumbles around ringside as Bohemoth quickly goes over to check on his ally's condition. Which only gets worse, as suddenly James Blonde flies out of the ring...and wipes out the duo with a plancha!! "YEEEEAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!" COLE And more talent than you give him credit for 'Boose...as proved by that BEAUTIFUL plancha! Rolling off of the bodies, Blonde fires up the fans before loading Wright back into the ring. Blonde then begins to head up top, climbing the ropes carefully while Wright tries to find his feet. As he reaches the top, Blonde is forced to pause as CW searches for his perched opponent, seemingly taking forever to turn around. And when he finally does, Blonde soars, wiping out Wright with a high crossbody and landing on top... ONE! T... ...kickout. Blonde is quickly back up, snatching an arm and whipping Wright into the corner. Hitting the turnbuckles, Wright stumbles out, into another irish whip from Blonde that sends him into the opposite corner. Again, out staggers Christian, again into an irish whip, again hitting the opposite turnbuckles. COLE Blonde has got Christian Wright reeling here! As he staggers out for the third time, Blonde attempts a hiptoss. But Wright blocks it once...and blocks it twice. So Blonde snaps a kick into Wright's midsection, before hooking his leg over Wright's head and tumbling behind Wright. Wright manages to hang onto Blonde's arm though and before he can execute his next move, Blonde gets yanked into a short-arm clotheslin...NO, Blonde ducks! Using his momentum, Wright carries on into the ropes and swings with a clothesline again. Again though, Blonde ducks, hitting the ropes himself and wiping out Wright with another crossbody block... ONE! ...kickout. On the outside, Bohemoth can only yell words of encouragement, as his man is caught with a boot to the gut and snared into a side headlock. Wright quickly fires off forearms to the ribs, backing Blonde into the ropes and sending him off across the ring. As Blonde rebounds, Wright drops down, causing Blonde to go up and over. On runs the Canadian cruiser, as Wright drops down again. However, this time, Blonde puts the brakes on. Confused, Wright pushes himself onto his hands and knees, looking around for Blonde...and gets snared over with an Oklahoma Roll... ONE! T... ...kickout. Both men quickly get to their feet. But it's Blonde who's got his head together, catching Wright with a side headlock takeover and hanging onto the hold. COLE It seems like Christian may have underestimated James Blonde. So far, apart from the early cheapshots, it's been all Blonde...and Wright looks completely flustered. CABOOSE Well, he's probably suffering from jetlag. He only got back from Japan a couple of days ago and I'll guarantee you, he wasn't expecting to be forced into a match tonight. Just another example of the poor management in this company. COACH Dude, they should make me GM. GM JC. HOLLA! COLE ...could be worse. CABOOSE How? As Blonde continues to hang onto the *coughrestholdcough* headlock, Wright angrily yells at Hebner for suggesting he might want to quit. So Blonde tightens up the headlock with a smile. As Hebner continues to check on Wright, The Natural reaches back and grabs a hold of Blonde's tights, levering him back onto his shoulders... ONE! ...Blonde kicks back into position, trying to tell Hebner about the tights pull. But as he tries, Wright grabs the tights again and pulls over Blonde... ONE! ...again, Blonde kicks back. This time, Hebner wheels around to check on any possible tight-pulling. But he needn't bother, as Wright pulls himself back to his feet and shoves Blonde off into the ropes. Coming back, Blonde tries a shoulderblock. Which is a big mistake, as it's he that goes down and Wright that remains standing. Finally, Wright seems to be control again as he hits the ropes. Blonde rolls over, so Wright hurdles him and scampers back... *SMACK!* ...and EATS a standing dropkick from Blonde!! Wright almost gets flipped fully over, landing hard on the back of his head, as Blonde dives on top of him with an eager cover... ONE! TW... Kickout. Smartly, Blonde re-applies the headlock as soon as Wright pushes off of his back. This time though, Wright is quick to get back to his feet, still looking a little dazed as he sends Blonde off into the ropes once more. Exploding off the ropes, Blonde again looks for the running forearm, but ends up running straight into the clutches of his opponent. Wright quickly locks his arms and looks for a belly to belly...but a double earclap breaks that up and sends him reeling away! COACH Somebody's been watching some 80's wrestling, eh? Ears ringing, CW staggers away while Blonde rushes the ropes once more. But as he does so, Hebner seems concerned with Wright and checks on him, allowing Bohemoth to scoop an arm under the bottom rope and trip Blonde up!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COLE Oh, come on! Yet again, more rotten tactics! CABOOSE He tripped. COLE He did not trip! Bohemoth clearly pulled his leg from under him! CABOOSE Mikey, if you wear tassles on your kneepads, you can't bitch and complain when they trip you up or get caught in people's hands. Faqu tries to charge around the ring after Bohemoth, but Hebner spots him and warns him to get back to his part of ringside. Luckily, Blonde isn't too hurt from the trip and quickly turns around, pointing an accusing finger at the new HI-YAH Heavyweight Champion. But in doing so, he turns his back on Christian Wright, who brushes Hebner aside and drives his knee into James Blonde's kidneys! Down goes Blonde like a sack of potatoes, quickly getting cradled up by Wright for a cover... ONE! TWO! Only two! COLE Blonde kicks out, but the damage has been done here. Grabbing Blonde by the hair, Wright drags him to his feet and backs him into the corner. A quick, yet humiliating slap does little damage. But Wright then stoops low, driving a shoulder into the gut of Blonde. And again. Three, four, five shoulders drive the wind out of Blonde before Wright whips him towards the opposite corner. Wright then charges in, but Blonde plants his hands on the top rope and launches up and over Wright...or, up, at least, as Wright puts the brakes on and catches Blonde in a fireman's carry position. Flailing, Blonde tries to scramble to safe ground. But Wright suddenly charges out of the corner and tumbles all his weight across Blonde with the Honor Roll, landing on his feet in front of Blonde and holding his hands to the side with a smirk. "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" CABOOSE Well, Wright's got his head straight, got his gameplan going. Maybe now we'll see who the REAL wrestler in that ring is. COLE Yeah, maybe now, after all the blatant cheating! As Blonde groans and mods on the mat, CW casually strolls over and wipes the flat of his boot across Blonde's face, earning him a reprimand from Hebner. Wright shrugs it off though, pulling up Blonde. A big right hand rocks him, followed up with a back elbow. Stumbling backwards, just the ropes prop up Blonde now, as Wright drives a couple of knees to the gut. Christian has things going his way now, casually dragging Blonde away from the ropes and hooking him for a suplex... ...looking to hurl him across the top rope... ...but Blonde floats over the back! Wright turns around and goes for a right hand, but Blonde blocks and connects with a jab! Jab! Jab! Jab! Wright is reeling, as Blonde rears back... *SLAP!* "WHOOOOOO!" ...and rocks CW with a knifedge! COLE I told you this kid had heart! *SLAP!* "WHOOOOOO!" Another chop lights up Wright's bronzed chest, mouth agape... *SLAP!* "WHOOOOOO!" ...as Blonde nails him again. The Natural is rocking and rolling, reeling and...uhm...something, as Blonde turns to the crowd and looks for their support. Which is all the opening Wright needs, lunging forward and kneeing Blonde in the gut again! Winded, Blonde drops to one knee, as Wright takes the chance at a reprieve to catch his own breath. Up comes Blonde again though, so CW goes to the gut again, before desperately grabbing Blonde by the hair and tights and pitching him away... *CLUNK!* "OOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" ...UNDERNEATH THE BOTTOM ROPE, RIBS FIRST INTO THE RINGPOST!!! COACH WOAH! CABOOSE Right into the post. What a great move! Wright slumps into a seated position, a relieved smile on his face as he gets the chance to catch his breath. Meanwhile, Faqu rushes over to check on his partner, as does referee Hebner. COLE I don't know whether that was accidental or a deliberate attempt to injure James Blonde. But either way, there may be no way Blonde can continue after that. As the worried Samoan and the worried referee gather around the motionless James Blonde, Christian Wright pulls himself to his feet in the ring and wanders over to his opponent. Quickly, Hebner forces Wright to retreat, clearly concerned for Blonde's condition. Wright obliges, waiting in the opposite corner of the ring, while Blonde is checked on. Hebner then goes to the outside so that he can actually talk to Blonde. But as soon as he does, Wright smirks, suddenly sprinting across the ring and crashing into Blonde's ribs with a baseball slide that crushes him against the ringpost again!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" The fans boo the hell out of Wright for his shameful tactic. But he could care less, grabbing Blonde and dragging his limp body from under the bottom turnbuckle into the ring. Blonde is clearly hurt, but Wright could care less as he turns Blonde onto his front and applies a camel clutch. COLE This is certainly no accident! This is just a ruthless attack from a man who wants us to believe he's some sort of 'moral highground'...when in reality, he's just an assho... CABOOSE Hey, easy there! COLE Well, it's true. Maybe if he practiced what he preached once in a while, these people wouldn't resent him so much. But I can't remember a single moral thing this Christian Wright has done since arriving! Wright now has a sick smile on his face as he wrenches back with the camel clutch, Hebner powerless to do any more than check if Blonde wants to give up. Face contorted in pain, Blonde shakes his head with a 'NO'. But Wright continues to lean back on the hold and bend Blonde as close to in-half as possible. "BLONDE!" "BLONDE!" "BLONDE!" "BLONDE!" The crowd rally behind Blonde now as he grits his teeth, reaching out for the ropes defiantly. Wright doesn't let him get close though, before re-wrenching the hold and re-asserting his dominance. On the outside, Faqu seems clearly worried, as his partner desperatly clings on. Even despite Wright now fish-hooking his mouth for good measure. 1! 2! 3! 4! Wright breaks the fishhook on four, but not the camel clutch, which is doing the real damage. Again, Blonde refuses to give up as Hebner once more asks him. So CW pulls back a little extra on the hold. But still, Blonde is hanging on. And in his frustration, Wright once again grabs a fishhook on the mouth. 1! 2! 3! 4! Breaking the hold, Wright is this time forced to break the camel clutch itself by impatient referee Mark Hebner. Wright doesn't seem too worried though, as he drags Blonde up to his feet and takes him over with a textbook vertical suplex. Clutching his ribs immediately, Blonde tries to roll out of the ring, but can't get out in time, as Wright grabs him by the ankle and drags him towards the centre of the ring. Blonde tries to crawl away again, but Wright is again there to stop him, as he again applies the camel clutch. COLE Going back to the hold, Christian Wright clearly has no intention of trying to wrestle Blonde on his feet again. He wants to keep this on the mat. CABOOSE And it's only a matter of time before Blonde has to give up. Wright sits in with the hold, looking out into the crowd as he casually pulls back on the head. "BLONDE!" "BLONDE!" "BLONDE!" "BLONDE!" Again, the fans are rallying behind the Canadian, as he tries to push up and escape the hold. Wriggling this way and that, Blonde has managed to all but block out the pain now and is doing everything in his power to escape the camel clutch. Sensing that he may be in trouble, Wright tries to tighten up the hold. But Blonde is still fighting, so Wright decides to grab a handful of Blonde's face and tug at whatever 'hooks' he can grab. 1! 2! 3! 4! Breaking on four, Wright angrily releases the camel clutch again, dropping a knee into the small of Blonde's back. Another groan escapes Blonde, as Wright rolls him over and makes a pin attempt... ONE! TWO! Shoulder up! "YEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!" COLE Despite the pain and despite the hurt ribs, Blonde isn't going to quit on you. Grabbing a handful of hair, Wright begins to drag Blonde up once more. Blonde meekly sends a forearm into Wright's abdomen, but The Natural shrugs it off and snaps Blonde over with another vertical suplex. Hitting the mat, Blonde's back arches him off the canvas slightly. Only for Wright to shove him back down and drop an elbow across the chest. Before dropping a second one slightly lower, into the ribs. Blonde can do little except writhe in pain, while Wright takes his time...about dropping a knee into the chest, following it up with another cover... ONE! TWO! Just two! Wright looks slightly pertubed as Blonde's shoulder comes off the canvas, pulling him to his feet. Stooping low, CW charges and shoves Blonde back into the turnbuckles. Blonde begins to fall out from the corner, but Wright shoves him back and drives in some more shoulder thrusts...three, four and then five, before coming back up and following them up with a knee. With his opponent safely slumped in the corner, Wright takes a moment to taunt the fans, before lifting Blonde so he's seated on the top turnbuckle. COACH What's this? COLE I'm not sure, but it doesn't look good for James Blonde! With Blonde perched, Wright turns his back to the Canadian and hooks his hands under his armpits. But whatever he has in mind doesn't come to fruition as Blonde quickly punts him between the shoulder blades. The shock causes Wright to release Blonde, turning slowly around...and getting NAILED in the jaw with a right hand! And again. Wright staggers, as Blonde snatches him in a front facelock and dives off the top, whipping around and SPIKING Wright on his head with a Tornado DDT!! "YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" COACH It looked like Wright was attempting an Iconoclasm, but Blonde fought his way out and now both men are down and hurtin'! CABOOSE Since when do you know what an Iconoclasm set-up looks like!?! COACH Iconawhat? Stop speaking gibberish, Englishman. With both Wright and Blonde down, Hebner checks on their condition before stepping back... 1! ...and applying his count. 2! 3! "BLONDE!" "BLONDE!" "BLONDE!" 4! 5! 6... On six, Wright has pulled himself up on the ropes and is just about on his feet. Hebner stops his count as Wright stumbles around the ring, while Blonde is now pulling himself up slowly but surely as well. Both men are eventually up to their feet, with Wright first to swing with a right hand...ducked by Blonde, who connects with one of his own. Gritting his teeth, Blonde continues to nail right hands, his left clutched to his ribs, as he begins to back Wright up against the ropes. Wright boots him in the gut to turn the tide, wheeling Blonde around and sending him into the ropes. As he swings with a clothesline though, Wright gets only air, as Blonde ducks underneath and takes Wright over with a schoolboy... ONE! TW... ...No, Blonde can't hold Wright down. Both men scramble up, with Wright going to the gut with a knee again and pulling Blonde into a standing headscissors. Cutting the air to signal it's OVAH~, Wright then scoops up Blonde...crucifixing his arms... ...but Blonde tumbles free, taking Wright over with a sunset flip... ONE! TWO! Just two! Again, both men race to beat the other up, with Blonde first to do so and charging at his opponent. But CW sees him coming, ducking his head and... *WHAM!* COACH SPINEBUSTAAAAAAAAAAHHH~! Blonde gets drilled, as Wright catches his breath momentarily before making the cover... ONE! TWO! T... NO!! "YEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!" Wright questions the count as he gets to his feet, backing Hebner into a corner with his protests. Behind him, James Blonde is getting to his feet, Wright seemingly unaware as Blonde charges him... ...but Wright moves... ...and Blonde JUST stops short of crushing Hebner in the corner! Seeing his opportunity, Wright charges quickly, Blonde and Hebner's confusion leaving them standing targets... *OOOOF!* ...but Hebner and Blonde BOTH move out of the way, causing Wright to crash sternum first into the turnbuckles, staggering out into another schoolboy roll-up... ONE! TWO! THR... KICKOUT!! "OOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" COLE Damn it, so close! COACH That's not very impartial. COLE Wright planned that whole movement. Wright was trying to sandwich Hebner in the corner, to get him out of the way, but it didn't work either time and it almost cost Wright the match. Which would have been no more than he deserved! As he gets to his feet, Wright again seems too pre-occupied with Hebner. And for his troubles, he gets a boot to the gut and a quick Million $ Kneelift from Blonde! Down goes Wright, but he's quickly back up, easy prey however for a Blonde clothesline. Another clothesline connects and now Wright is reeling again. Blonde quickly grabs an arm and whips Wright across the ring and into the ropes, ducking his head as he comes back. But does so too early. Wright sees it and drops in front of Blonde, driving an axehandle into the back of the head that torques Blonde's body down before it whiplashes back up again. Blonde staggers back, the ropes pushing him back towards Wright. Who is waiting, catching Blonde under the arms and driving him to the canvas!! CABOOSE Wright Off!! He got him with the Wright Off!! ONE! TWO! THREE.. NO, SHOULDER UP!! "YEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" Wright looks completely shocked, as Hebner confirms it was just a two count. Faqu applauds his partner's efforts from ringside while Wright pulls himself up and verbally launches into Hebner once more. But Hebner is unwavering, leaving The Natural furious. "BLONDE!" "BLONDE!" "BLONDE!" "BLONDE!" Pointing into the crowd, Wright yells that "This one's for you" before walking back over to Blonde and grabbing him by the leg. COLE Wait a minute, Wright's signalling for the Figure Four Leglock her...NO! *CLUNK!* "YEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHH!" COLE ...RIGHT INTO THE POST!! The crowd go wild as Blonde blocks Wright's Figure Four attempt by shoving him shoulder-first into the ringpost! Bo can only watch on despairingly, as Wright staggers out from the corner, into a cradle from Blonde... ONE! TWO! THREE.. NOOOOO!!!!! "OOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!" Now it's Blonde's turn to question the count, as Wright is up but clearly dis-orientated. Pulling himself up, Blonde trails Wright with his arms raised, signalling as he snatches on the Cobra Clutch! But Wright puts a stop to the Illegally Blonde attempt with an punch to the gut! Two is enough to cause Blonde to retreat... *SMACK!* ...and he instantly takes a Superkick to the face!! COLE Wright dodged a bullet there. CABOOSE He did more than dodge it, Cole. He deflected it right into Blonde's face! With Blonde KOed seemingly, Wright shakes off the remaining pain in his shoulder. Before his expression becomes oh so deliciously evil, as he stares down at the writhing Blonde. With little hesitation, Wright bends down and drags Blonde to his knees. Snaring an arm, Wright pauses momentarily, before hooking up the other arm as well. Wright uses the double underhook to lift Blonde from his knees to his feet, before lifting him on up and over his shoulder, canadian backbreaker style. Still Blonde's arms are hooked and he seems completely helpless, as Wright circles the ring, letting the crowd get a good, long look... ...before dropping to his knees. "OOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" COLE Oh, my! That's the 'Spinal Fusion'! CABOOSE Seems like a fitting name. Blonde almost bends in half, the wrong way, before slumping off of Wright's shoulder. Smirking, Wright lounges back on top of Blonde with a casual cover. ONE! TWO! THREE! *DING DING DING!* "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COLE And he got him! Wright rolls to the side to his knees, smirk still on his face as he yanks his hand away from Mark Hebner to make his own victory salute. BUFFER Your winner of this match... "THE NATURAL"... CHRISTIAN... WWRRRRIIIIIIGGHHTT!!! Some of the crowd boo while the others seem eerily silent. Wright could care less what the fans are doing as he strolls across the ring and demands a microphone. Meanwhile, Faqu has entered the ring and together with Hebner is checking on James Blonde. Recieving the microphone, Wright strolls back over towards Blonde. Luckily for James, Faqu quickly places himself in between his fallen friend and the advancing Natural. Unluckily for Faqu, he doesn't see Bohemoth coming. *WHAM!* COLE Now, what the hell was the meaning of that!?! CABOOSE Pre-match warm-up? Faqu gets completely blindsighted by Bohemoth's clothesline and crashes to the mat. All of which increases the growing smirk on Wright's face. WRIGHT Let this be a lesson to you two...and to everyone in the locker rooms watching right now. For as long as I am unable to fight my moral fight against Leon Rodez, I will be forced to take alternative action. Leon, I cannot make you suffer directly. So, until I can...then those who support you and those that condone you...THEY will purge for YOUR sins! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" As the crowd jeer Christian Wright, he turns his attention to the fallen duo of Blonde and Faqu, crouching down beside them. WRIGHT James Blonde. Your sole intention for requesting this match with myself, was for Leon Rodez's good. And look where it has got you. When you wake up tommorrow morning in your hospital bed, with your ribs reminding you fully of this night...don't blame me. For I did this...for your own good. "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" WRIGHT When eating becomes too painful for you. When you have trouble moving, or even breathing...there is only one person to blame. Leon. Rodez. Wright turns away from Blonde, to Faqu, who is beginning to recover a little. WRIGHT And Faqu...when you wake up tommorrow morning, unable to walk...it's Leon Rodez YOU have to blame as well. The crowd jeer once more, as Wright tosses the microphone away, staring down at Faqu. COLE What does he mean by that...HEY! WHAT THE HELL!?! Suddenly, Wright grabs Faqu's injured right leg and whips around it, applying a Figure Four Leglock on the Samoan!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" *DINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDING!* Hebner frantically calls for the bell to be rung, as Faqu WAILS in pain. There's a downright sadistic look in the eyes of Christian Wright as he wrenches on the Figure Four, ripping and tearing at Faqu's knee, pulling back with the hold with every ounce of energy he has left in him. *DINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDING!* COLE Come on...GET SOMEBODY OUT HERE!! CABOOSE You're going to need more than 'somebody' out here. You're going to need a whole lot of 'somebodies'. The bell frantically rings once more, as finally Wright releases the Figure Four and rolls to his feet. The boos are still raining down on Wright as he stares at the lifeless Blonde and the writhing Faqu. Emotionless. No smile. No sorrow. Nothing...but vindication. COLE This chaos has got to stop! We've got two men, loyal OAOAST employees, who could be seriously injured. Something needs to be done about this! And we need some help out here for Faqu and James Blonde.

Three new additions to the TPI field, from the IWA's board. Mike Quackenbush, Super Dragon and Kevin Steen are now announced names, bringing the field up to 12. Three great additions. And Quack officially becomes my pick for the tournament. Updated List: [2000 SS16 Winner] CHRIS HERO [2004 TPI Winner] "The Phenomenal" AJ STYLES JAMES GIBSON "Wonderkid" JONNY STORM ROBBIE BROOKSIDE "The Product" MAREK BRAVE TYLER BLACK "American Dragon" BRYAN DANIELSON "The Notorious 187" HOMICIDE "Lightning" MIKE QUACKENBUSH SUPER DRAGON "Mr Wrestling" KEVIN STEEN

How many times has Big Show turned from face to heel since debuting? That's the major problem I've always had with the way Big Show's been booked. One minute he's a heel, next the face.

So, any gamblers here? I'm finally old enough to have a wager and I'm probably going to put a fiver on United to win the Premiership, just for pride.

C'mon Toxx...it's not the SWF if someone isn't waving their dick around.

Nobody has said here they trust him. We just have some sense of perspective.

Let's see...beat Sacred, beat Spike, beat Buck, beat Strangler (yes, the Clusterfuck counts)...yeah, I can see why you guys wouldn't want to have many matches with me too.

Like Test's Diving Gutwrench Powerbomb thing?

Rest assured, it didn't last long.

If they're going to do that, I'd rather they actually did something that IS new. ECW isn't new. It's a company that died 4 years ago. You can't have a weekly nostalgia TV show and expect it to become more and more successful. So, what if they have ECW every week. Every week, Joey Styles' voice becomes less of a markout, the matches seem less unique, the wrestler sightings become less special, the authenticity lapses (one show, sure, great...a weekly TV show can't be authentic ECW. And guaranteed, when the TV show isn't authentic, it won't take long for everyone to piss and moan about it), the markouts will finally stop and people will realise that ECW was far from perfection. I mean, as an example...the BWO works great as a nostalgia act. Weekly? What's the point of having an NWO parody turn up every week when there's no NWO to even parody anymore?

Toxx, you're right out of line. After all, W&D had a 133 DAY TITLE REIGN~!!!~!!~! ...how many times did you guys defend the belts again?

Credibility is the most important factor. If it doesn't finish people off, it's not a finisher. Which is why Shamrock's Ankle Lock > Angle's Ankle Lock > Raven's Ankle Lock. Shamrock's Ankle Lock was a great finisher. As soon as he locked it in, you knew there was no escape for the guy. It was protected, because hell, even Michaels tapped to it (albeit outside of a match). Bret tapped to it. Vader tapped to it. I can't remember if Taker ever tapped, probably not. But 9/10 times, Shamrock applied the Ankle Lock and it was over. Plus it was a pretty 'swift' move, especially with the armbar takedown set-up. Where-as Angle telegraphs the move every time. Plus, it popped the crowd (important). And he could apply it from out of nowhere. I'd take the Shamrock Ankle Lock and the Stunner as top finishers.

I used that Snitsky joke weeks ago, JJ. Get with the times.

I actually used Jericho's song off of that Originals CD for about a month.

Hmm, I suppose so.