King Cucaracha

*bump* I'm gonna comment once I get my battle royal done.

Okay, bare with me as this is all new to me. Lengthy opening which runs down the card differently from recent shows, something which I liked. Christian Fury vs. Carnage Man, I thought I went overboard of crowd noise and sound effects. Huh? Seriously, I have no idea what 1 metre is in inches and kilos are alien to me. Still, it's Britain so it's all cool. Okay...obviously, I'm gonna have to comment on the first person stuff as it's Fury. I'd never dream of doing it myself and certainly find it a lot more 'challenging' (as in it's not easily scannable) to read. But it certainly makes you unique. And there's nothing wrong with having a unique style. Besides that, you also make it work well. You do tend to to feel more 'in' the match, rather than simply watching it during the first person spots, and you manage not to go too overboard. The match itself. King's right about your use of Carnage. Good job of making him look a threat. The use of the set was good, with the organ and the glass...a nice, out of control hardcore match. The first-person ending kinda affected the flow of the ending, but you can still see what's happening. Again, Carnage gets put over strong at the end. Nice stuff, even if the flow does become hard to follow sometimes. Toxxic Is A Limey I like. Rather than simply have Toxxic cheered because he's a Brit, you have to turn the crowd in your favour...which makes a lot of sense. The promo itself makes sense too. God, us Brits suck, huh? Very well handled. Not actually turning you, not turning the crowd against Annie or Silent. It just works. Rev-0 Prom-0 Hmm, Spike is angry. You'd think he'd be happy, what with having a title. But nooooo. Building the intrigue of the mystery partner and already, whoever it is is being put over big-time. And man, Toxxic is an awesome leader figure. Spike Jenkins vs. Austin Sly Riley still loves Flesher. Don't we all? Woah, Spike is getting cheered? I know us Brits are a little weird, but come on. Give us some credit. New ref too. Man, this match has started off odd. Good little pure wrestling opening to start, before a little pushing...and some leapfrogs. After all, this is a Cruiser match. I'm liking the tempo. You have the slow build, and then suddenly it gets a little higher speed. ie, the Baseballslide-canrana. I found the double standing enziguri spot hard to picture. The build to the finish is great, with the germans being used for a reason...and just to complete the indie-esque match, the roll through into a Ratings Clash spot wins it. I enjoyed it and am impressed. If there was criticism to be found, it's that sometimes your style seems a little too much like 'Spike does this. Spike does that. Sly does this, so Spike does that' at times. Can't fault the content though. Kudos. Andrea Montgomery vs. David Cross Mass song lyrics in intros. Hmm...it's a PPV, so you're forgiven. We need someone to post an updated list of all the SWF refs, cause I'm confused. Speed vs. power to start and Drea, you're friggin' nuts. Seriously. The match turns into a technical fest surprisingly. But, really, how can you concentrate on that with Riley's madness. Genius. Aprubt ending, for some reason. Worth it just for the madness Riley. Megan Skye vs. Kelly Connelly MOTN, without a spiggin' doubt. 5,000 odd words of pure genius. Anyone who wants to give ACTUAL feedback is more than welcome to do so. I'm Feeling Fris-co Toxx, help me out...is it okay to call it a Manchester United 'Jersey'. It may just be me, but when I'm freezing my nuts off wearing it in this type of weather, I can't really bring myself to call it a jersey. Just me, maybe. Uhm...Frisco is back obviously. If he's active and professional, it's all cool. Landon Maddix vs. Max King This is better than it looked on WordPad, but I'm still indifferent to the rushed ending. Again, I've gone out of my way to review this show (which is FAR too long for my attention span, btw) so if someone could review my stuff then I'd be real grateful. On the subject, Max, I'll look at your match momentarily too. Rev-0ing Again I really, really like Toxxic as a leader character. I mean, he's a rookie and you wouldn't usually expect it to work. But it does. Todd Cortez and Ghost vs. Sean Davis and SACRED!?! Okay, I'll admit it. I thought it'd be Dace Night. Honestly, that was my instinct...especially when Dace showed up in the card thread a few days before the show. Sacred, I didn't expect. But I'll be damned if it wasn't a great choice. Loving the storyline with Ghost and without giving anything away, I know who Ghost is. And it's not Dace Night. Nifty little start and already, we've got the Ghost controversy to spice things up. And the Davis/Sacred distrust storyline is played up too. Again, it follows some solid tag format without being too predictable. Hot tags are good of course, but not all the time. The ol' partner assisted Abdominal Stretch brings some more 'regularity' to the match...as does the referee's arm kick. Old school indeed. Hot tag brings in Cortez. Suicide moonsault...which, correct me if I'm wrong, isn't very Van Siclen like. But there's a Van Siclen signature move with the elbow. Leading into the run to the finish which is nice and frantic. Both the storylines get a further boost with the Davis spear on Sacred...and then That Special Place to finish it. Could it really be Van Siclen!?! Hmm... A very fun tag match that does a good job with the storylines presented. I know who Ghost is, by the way. 'Manson vs. Nathaniel Kibagami' Yep. Suicide King vs. 'Grand Slam' Mark Stevens Firstly, the build has been awesome. Obviously, I don't really need to offer advice or anything on this one. Minor point on the rules. Pins don't have to be in the ring for HIAC, although that may have been a specific rule...in which case, pay me no heed. Right from the start it feels like an epic. Feels like you're reading something important. From there, what else can you say except awesome? It was everything you'd expect from the match and then some. The characters were played perfectly too. If anything, I've never really liked the ending you used...but, in this case it probably worked. The post-match ending is what'll be remembered most of course. Nice little touch with the out of character embrace afterwards as well. Very poignant and a fitting send-off. Or, at least until next time. Toxxic vs. Annie Eclectic Looks like I'm gonna have to break out the coffee for this one. Again, nice work on keeping some fans behind Annie rather than turning them all into your favour, Toxx. Your lesson for today: Women are sneaky, and like to hit people with long, wooden sticks. Supersoaker? Man, I only just realised how much I missed hardcore Toxxic. I'm actually honoured to get the Mutu joke. For those that don't, he's a coke fiend soccer player. Annie stealing Van Siclen's spot got a laugh out of me. Hey, maybe she's Ghost. Nice back and forth action. In-Flight Meal=GOLD~! Toxxic remembers Annie isn't all that strong for the DVD, which is attention to detail. Not spectacular, but attention nonetheless. Still the action goes back and forth, before Annie kicks out of the Caffeine Bomb? I wouldn't have expected that if I didn't notice how much further down the page I had to scroll. Nice to see the crowd turning on Toxxic when he acts a dick. Kicking out of the ladder assisted Hangover...maybe a little too much. Ooh, handcuffs. But Annie survives an uprotected chair shot. Putting her over strong. Inventive handcuff usage. And the ending is swift, surprising and pretty darned cool. Handshake post-match. I'm sure that'll get as much thought as the Flair/Orton handshake did. Toxx...you know you rock. Obviously, it wasn't Puro Central...but it was darn sure entertaining. And just think, 74 days more of this and you'll beat ELM's record. What?

Friday release date here in the UK as far as I'm aware, so I'll be renting this tommorrow and giving it a spin.

'Bout damn time. With a decent manager and gimmick, the potential is there. But I can't help but feel a bit sceptical. You know the unique style is going to be downsized and he's also a foreigner, which increases the chances of a bad gimmick. But there's hope.

My comments are coming...so, if anyone wants to prepare thoughts on my matches, then please do. Thankz.

+1 for anyone who has a Star Wars themed match. (Post to be edited once I've got my match confirmed)

Pepe's dead. Don't you remember the epic Chavo Guerrero vs. Norman Smiley feud?

SMARTMARKS WRESTLING FEDERATION CHAMPIONSHIP HISTORY - November 9th, 2004 **** SWF WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPIONSHIP **** 1. RANE -- 9/18/00 -- NTD -- 1 Day (1) 2. NTD -- 9/19/00 -- N/A -- 4 Days (2) 3. G.O.A.T. -- 9/23/00 -- NTD -- 14 Days 4. RANE (2)-- 10/07/00 -- G.O.A.T. -- 58 Days 5. SPIKE -- 12/04/00 -- Rane -- 33 Days 6. RANE (3)-- 1/27/01 -- Spike -- 63 Days 7. PDS -- 4/01/01 -- Rane -- 12 Days 8. DIVEFIRE -- 4/13/01 -- PDS -- 21 Days (3) 9. STUBBY "POTS" MCWEED -- 5/27/01 -- Bobby Riley -- 44 Days (4)(5) 10. "GRAND SLAM" MARK STEVENS -- 7/22/01 -- N/A -- 28 Days (6) 11. CHRIS WILSON -- 8/19/01 -- Mark Stevens -- 28 Days 12. EL LUCHADORE MAGNIFICO -- 9/16/01 -- Chris Wilson -- 47 Days (7) 13. HVILLE THUGG -- 11/02/01 -- El Luchadore Magnifico -- 67 Days (8) 14. SUICIDE KING -- 1/20/02 -- Hville Thugg -- 28 Days 15. "GRAND SLAM" MARK STEVENS (2) -- 2/17/02 -- Suicide King -- 9 Days 16. HVILLE THUGG (2) -- 2/26/02 -- "Grand Slam" Mark Stevens -- 89 Days 17. EDWIN MACPHISTO -- 5/26/02 -- Hville Thugg -- 103 Days (9) 18. EL LUCHADORE MAGNIFICO (2) -- 9/6/02 -- Edwin MacPhisto -- 35 Days 19. SACRED -- 10/11/02 -- El Luchadore Magnifico -- 16 Days 20. EL LUCHADORE MAGNIFICO (3) -- 10/27/02 -- Sacred -- 127 Days 21. TNT -- 3/16/03 -- El Luchadore Magnifico -- 19 Days 22. TOM FLESHER -- 4/4/02 -- TNT -- 89 Days 23. THOTH -- 7/2/03 -- Tom Flesher -- 14 Days 24. BOSTON STRANGLER -- 7/16/03 -- Thoth -- 58 Days 25. TOM FLESHER (2) -- 9/12/03 -- Boston Strangler -- 95 Days 26. EJIRO FASAKI -- 12/16/03 -- Tom Flesher -- 22 Days 27. DANNY WILLIAMS -- 1/7/04 -- Ejiro Fasaki -- 15 Days 28. VA’AIGA -- 2/1/04 -- Danny Williams -- 35 Days 29. CHARLIE "GRAPPLER" MATTHEWS -- 3/7/04 -- Va’aiga -- 49 Days 30. “THE NOTORIOUS” JOHN DURAN -- 4/25/04 -- Charlie “Grappler” Matthews -- 10 Days 31. DANNY WILLIAMS (2) -- 5/5/04 -- “The Notorious” John Duran -- 9 Days 32. NATHANIEL KIBAGAMI -- 5/14/04 -- Danny Williams -- 10 Days 33. DANNY WILLIAMS (3) -- 5/24/04 -- Nathaniel Kibagami -- 20 Days 34. JANUS -- 6/13/04 -- Danny Williams -- 49 Days 35. TOXXIC -- 8/1/04 -- Tom Flesher (10) -- 19 Days 36. JOHNNY DANGEROUS -- 8/20/04 -- Toxxic -- 30 Days 37. TOXXIC (2) -- 9/19/04 -- Johnny Dangerous -- 51 Days and counting (1) Rane defeated NTD to become the first IGNWF Champ (2) Rane handed the title over to NTD (3) Divefire vacated the title upon becoming commissioner (4) Stubby won an eight man tournament, defeating Bobby Riley in the finals. (5) Stubby vacated the title due to a neck injury (6) This was Regenerate Rules match involving Mark Stevens, Bobby Riley, Mercury, Chris Wilson and Perfect Bo for the vacant title. (7) This was a six pack way matchup involving King of Hearts, Neilsen of the Jungle, Axis, Chris Wilson, El Luchadore Magnifico and Stubby "Pots" McWeed. (8) Hville Thugg's ICTV Title was also on the line in this match. (9) This was a triple threat match also involving Perfect Bo. (10) Toxxic beat Tom Flesher and Janus in a triple threat match for the SWF World Heavyweight Title. Longest Title Reign - El Luchadore Magnifico, 127 days Most Title Reigns - El Luchadore Magnifico, Rane and Danny Williams, 3 Most Days with Title - El Luchadore Magnifico, 209 days **** SWF INTERCONTINENTAL TELEVISION CHAMPIONSHIP **** 1. NTD -- 9/18/00 -- N/A -- 19 Days (1) 2. PIMP DADDY SARP - 10/07/00 -- NTD -- 29 Days 3. STUBBY "POTS" MCWEED -- 11/15/00 -- PDS -- 19 Days 4. MR. GALATEA - 12/4/00 -- Stubby "Pots" McWeed -- 13 Days (2) 5. FALLOUT -- 12/17/00 -- Mr. Galatea -- 21 Days 6. NEILSEN OF THE JUNGLE -- 01/28/01 -- Fallout -- 8 Days (3) 7. OUTCAST -- 02/05/01 -- Neilsen of the Jungle -- 55 Days 8. MERCURY -- 04/01/01 -- Outcast -- 13 Days (4) 9. "GRAND SLAM" MARK STEVENS -- 04/29/01 -- Angelous -- 28 Days(5) 10. CHRIS STORM -- 05/27/01 -- Mark Stevens -- 5 Days (6) 11. "GRAND SLAM" MARK STEVENS (2) -- 06/01/01 -- Chris Storm -- 35 Days 12. CHRIS RAYNOR -- 07/06/01 -- Mark Stevens -- 16 Days 13. AXIS -- 07/22/01 -- Chris Raynor -- 28 Days 14. EDWIN MACPHISTO -- 08/19/01 -- Axis -- 19 Days (7) 12. CHRIS STORM (2)-- 09/07/01 -- Edwin MacPhisto -- 9 Days 13. HVILLE THUGG -- 09/16/01 -- Chris Storm -- 61 Days (8) 14. AXIS (2) -- 11/16/01 -- Hville Thugg -- 37 Days 15. X -- 12/23/01 -- Axis -- 21 Days 16. THOTH -- 1/25/02 -- Xstasy -- 23 Days (9) 17. EDWIN MACPHISTO (2) -- 2/17/02 -- Thoth -- 60 Days 18. THOTH (2) -- 4/18/02 -- Edwin MacPhisto -- 10 Days 19. SACRED -- 4/28/02 -- Thoth -- 28 Days 20. FALLOUT (2) -- 5/26/02 -- Sacred -- 5 Days 21. SACRED (2) -- 5/31/02 -- Fallout -- 30 Days 22. EREK TAYLOR -- 6/30/02 -- Sacred -- 36 Days (10) 23. FALLOUT (3) -- 8/5/02 -- Erek Taylor -- 7 Days 24. CHRIS WILSON -- 8/12/02 -- Fallout -- 39 Days 25. PERFECT BO -- 9/20/02 -- Chris Wilson -- 9 Days (11) 26. TOM FLESHER -- 9/29/02 -- Perfect Bo -- 63 Days 27. OROCHI (3) -- 12/1/02 -- Tom Flesher -- 34 Days 28. FROST -- 1/17/03 -- Orochi -- 58 Days (12) 29. NEILSEN OF THE JUNGLE (2) -- 3/16/03 -- Frost -- 0 Days 30. FROST (2) -- 3/16/03 -- Neilsen of the Jungle -- 5 Days (13) 31. JAY DAWG -- 3/31/03 -- Danny Williams -- 34 Days (14) 32. DANNY WILLIAMS -- 5/4/03 -- Jay Dawg -- 55 Days 33. STRYKE -- 6/28/03 -- Danny Williams -- 9 Days 34. BEEZEL -- 7/7/03 -- Stryke -- 4 Days 35. MAK FRANCIS -- 7/11/03 -- Beezel -- 79 Days 36. "THE SACRED ONE" ANDREW BLACKWELL (3) -- 9/28/03 -- Mak Francis -- 24 Days 37. XSTASY (2) -- 10/22/03 -- Andrew Blackwell -- 40 Days 38. DACE NIGHT -- 12/01/03 -- Xstasy -- 15 Days 39. CHARLIE "GRAPPLER" MATTHEWS -- 12/16/03 -- Dace Night -- 82 Days 40. INSANE LUCHADOR -- 3/7/04 -- Charlie "Grappler" Matthews -- 10 Days 41. TOXXIC -- 3/17/04 -- Insane Luchador -- 23 Days 42. TERRENCE "JANUS" BAILEY -- 4/9/04 -- Toxxic -- 16 Days 43. TOXXIC (2) -- 4/25/04 -- Wildchild (15) -- 29 Days 44. TERRENCE "JANUS" BAILEY (2) -- 5/24/04 -- Toxxic -- 30 Days 45. LANDON "LA CUCARACHA" MADDIX -- 6/23/04 -- Ace Lezaire (16) -- 24 Days 46. JOHNNY DANGEROUS -- 7/17/04 -- Landon "La Cucaracha" Maddix -- 15 Days 47. LANDON "LA CUCARACHA" MADDIX (2) -- 8/1/04 -- Johnny Dangerous -- 59 Days 48. "THE ICON" MAX KING -- 9/29/04 -- Landon "La Cucaracha" Maddix -- 39 Days (17) 49. LANDON "LA CUCARACHA" MADDIX (3) -- 11/7/04-- "The Icon" Max King -- 2 Days and counting (1) NTD was the original champion, the belt was handed to him (2) Mr. Galatea defeated PDS, The Messiah, Fallout and Stubby in a Hide and Seek Match (3) Neilsen defeated Outcast and Fallout in a three way ladder match. (4) Mercury vacated the title due to various injuries (5) Mark Stevens defeated Angelous for the vacated title. (6) Chris Storm defeated Chris Wilson and Mark Stevens in a Last Man Standing Submission Match (7) Triple threat match also involving Xstasy (8) Triple threat match also involving Mistress Sarah (9) Triple threat match also involving Perfect Bo (10) Four way match also involving Fallout and Longdogger Pete (11) Triple threat Miami Mayhem match also involving Longdogger Pete (12) Triple threat match also involving Danny Williams (13) After winning the ICTV title from Frost, Neilsen rejected the belt, returning it to Frost and naming him the new champion. (14) Frost vacated the title on 3/21/03. This was a match for the vacant title. (15) Toxxic won the ICTV title in a four corners tag match triple fall match in which the first fall was for the ICTV title. The four teams involved were Toxxic & Jimmy "The Demon" Liston, Wildchild & Johnny Dangerous, Todd Cortez & Mike Van Siclen, and Terrence "Janus" Bailey & Aecas. (16) Ace Lezaire was Landon Maddix's opponent for the ICTV title after Janus vacated it earlier on the same night, having just won the SWF World Heavyweight Title on June 13th, 2004. (17) Max King was beaten in a Dumpster Match by Landon Maddix, for the title. However, due to a controversial decision in the match the title change was stricken from the records and King's title reign was deemed to have continued regardless. Longest Title Reign - Charlie "Grappler" Matthews, 82 Days Most Title Reigns - Fallout, Orochi/Thoth, Sacred and Landon Maddix, 3 Most Days with Title - Landon "La Cucaracha" Maddix, 85 Days and counting **** SWF UNITED STATES / JUNIOR LEAGUE CHAMPIONSHIP **** 1. OUTCAST -- 10/29/00 -- Spike -- 36 Days (1) 2. DIVEFIRE -- 12/04/00 -- Outcast -- 21 Days 3. MERCURY -- 01/15/01 -- Divefire -- 36 Days 4. AXIS -- 03/02/01 -- Mercury -- 45 Days 5. PERFECT BO -- 04/16/01 -- Axis -- 69 Days 6. EDWIN MACPHISTO -- 06/24/01 -- "Grand Slam" Mark Stevens -- 28 Days (2) 7. GRIMEDOGG -- 07/22/01 -- Edwin MacPhisto -- 28 Days 8. THOTH -- 08/19/01 -- Grimedogg -- 92 Days (3) 9. MERCURY (2) -- 11/19/01 -- Thoth -- 7 Days 10. BOBBY RILEY -- 11/26/01 -- Mercury -- 11 Days 11. SACRED -- 12/7/01 -- Bobby Riley -- 72 Days 12. XSTASY -- 3/1/02 -- Sacred -- 21 Days 13. JAY DAWG -- 3/22/02 -- Xstasy -- 9 Days 14. K-OS -- 3/31/02 -- Jay Dawg -- 5 Days (4) 15. JAY DAWG (2) -- 4/5/02 -- K-Os -- 8 Days 16. JAY DAWG (3) -- 4/28/02 -- Perfect Bo -- 33 Days (5) 17. TOM FLESHER -- 6/4/02 -- N/A -- 17 Days (6) 18. CHRIS RAYNOR -- 6/21/02 -- Tom Flesher -- 9 Days 19. TOM FLESHER (2) -- 6/30/02 -- Chris Raynor -- 36 Days (7) 20. "TNT" TAYLOR NICHOLAS THOMPSON -- 8/5/02 -- Tom Flesher -- 4 Days 21. TOM FLESHER (3) -- 8/9/02 -- "TNT" Taylor Nicholas Thompson -- 35 Days 22. TOD DEKINDES -- 9/13/02 -- Tom Flesher -- 49 Days 23. ANNIE ECLECTIC -- 11/1/02 -- Tod deKindes -- 30 Days 24. DANNY WILLIAMS -- 12/1/02 -- Annie Eclectic -- 55 Days 25. MAK FRANCIS -- 2/7/03 -- Danny Williams -- 16 Days 26. DANNY WILLIAMS (2) -- 2/23/03 -- Mak Francis -- 21 Days 27. MAK FRANCIS (2) -- 3/16/03 -- Danny Williams -- 15 Days 28. MICHAEL CRAVEN -- 3/31/03 -- Mak Francis -- 23 Days 29. MIKE VAN SICLEN -- 4/23/03 -- Michael Craven -- 11 days 30. MICHAEL CRAVEN (2) -- 5/4/03 -- Mike Van Siclen -- 49 days 31. MAK FRANCIS (3) -- 6/22/03 -- Michael Craven -- 10 days 32. MICHAEL CRAVEN (3) -- 7/2/03 -- Mak Francis -- 19 days 33. EJIRO FASAKI -- 7/21/03 -- Michael Craven -- 93 days 34. JOHNNY DANGEROUS -- 10/22/03 -- Ejiro Fasaki -- 49 days 35. LINCHPIN -- 12/10/03 -- Johnny Dangerous -- 28 days 36. CHARLIE "GRAPPLER" MATTHEWS -- 1/7/04 -- Linchpin (8) -- 9 days 37. "SACRED" ANDREW BLACKWELL (2) -- 1/16/04 -- Charlie "Grappler" Matthews -- 51 days (9) 38. "COYOTE" COY WEST -- 3/7/04 -- "Sacred" Andrew Blackwell -- 24 days 39. STRYKE -- 3/31/04 -- "Coyote" Coy West -- 14 days 40. "WILD" COY WEST (2) -- 4/14/04 -- Stryke (10) -- 26 days 41. LANDON “LA CUCARACHA” MADDIX -- 5/10/04 -- “Wild” Coy West -- 34 Days 42. ALAN CLARK -- 6/13/04 -- Landon "La Cucaracha" Maddix -- 10 Days 43. THE MASKED MAN -- 6/23/04 -- Alan Clark (11) -- 28 Days 44. MANSON -- 7/21/04 -- The Masked Man -- 26 Days 45. "THE CORONA" VLADIMIR EVERHEART -- 8/16/04 -- Manson -- 9 Days 46. DAVID CROSS -- 8/25/04 -- "The Corona" Vladimir Everheart -- 9 Days 47. ACE LEZAIRE -- 9/3/04 -- David Cross -- 16 Days 48. DAVIS CROSS (2) -- 9/19/04 -- Ace Lezaire -- 24 Days 49. ACE LEZAIRE (2) -- 10/14/04 -- David Cross -- 8 Days 50. TODD CORTEZ -- 10/22/04 -- Ace Lezaire -- 18 Days and counting (1) Outcast won a 20 Man Tournament for the US Title, defeating Spike in the final. (2) This was a two fall, two title match, involving Edwin MacPhisto, Mark Stevens, Perfect Bo and eXodus. (3) Thoth defeated Grimedogg, Alex Cross and Robert Steele, in a Last Blood Match (4) This was a triple threat elimination match also involving Lady Red. (5) Due to a controversial decision the title was held up on 4/13/02. This was a match for the vacant title. (6) Jay Dawg was stripped of the title on 5/31/02. This was a triple threat match for the vacant title also involving Annie Eclectic and Xero. (7) This was a triple threat match also involving Jay Dawg. (8) The Intercontinental Television Title was also on the line in this match. (9) Sacred defeated Landon Maddix on February 1st, 2004 to unify the United States and Smartmarks Junior League Championships. (10) This was a triple threat match also involving Todd Royal. (11) Alan Clark was involved in a four corners match with Todd Cortez and Aecas for the title where the first pin wins; Clark was the man pinned in the match. Longest Title Reign - Ejiro Fasaki, 93 days Most Title Reigns - Jay Dawg, Mak Francis, Michael Craven and Tom Flesher, 3 Most Days with Title - Sacred/Andrew Blackwell, 123 days **** SWF TAG TEAM CHAMPIONSHIP **** 1. NTD & RANE -- 9/18/00 -- N/A -- 7 Days (1) 2. PIMP DADDY SARP & RANE (2) -- 9/25/00 -- Curry Man -- 12 Days (2) (3) 3. DANNY VIGILANTE & DIVEFIRE -- 10/29/00 -- Malignant Odium -- 49 Days (4) 4. ANGELOUS & MOLOCK -- 12/17/00 -- DVD -- 84 Days 5. CHRIS RAYNOR & CHRIS STORM -- 4/01/01 -- The Fallen -- 19 Days 6. CYCLONE COMET & RANE (3) -- 4/20/01 -- Y2Chris -- 42 Days 7. AXIS & CYCLONE COMET (2)-- 6/01/01 -- N/A -- 23 Days (5) 8. ANGELOUS (2) & MOLOCK (2) -- 6/24/01 -- Cyclone Comet and Axis -- 20 Days (6) 9. CHRIS WILSON & HVILLE THUGG -- 7/14/01 -- The Fallen -- 3 Days (7) 10. NEILSEN OF THE JUNGLE & PERFECT BO -- 7/22/01 -- HVille Thugg and Mistress Sarah -- 28 Days (8) 11. CHRIS RAYNOR (2) & SPARK -- 8/19/01 -- Neilsen of the Jungle and Perfect Bo -- 28 Days 12. "GRAND SLAM" MARK STEVENS & OUTCAST -- 9/16/01 -- Chris Raynor and Spark -- 35 Days 13. ANDREA MONTGOMERY & JOHNNY ROTTEN -- 10/21/01-- "Grand Slam" Mark Stevens and Outcast -- 23 Days 14. "GRAND SLAM" MARK STEVENS (2) & MISTRESS SARAH -- 11/12/01 -- Andrea Montgomery & Johnny Rotten -- 14 Days 15. HVILLE THUGG (2) & X -- 11/26/01 -- "Grand Slam" Mark Stevens & Mistress Sarah -- 27 Days 16. EDWIN MACPHISTO & "GRAND SLAM" MARK STEVENS (3) -- 12/23/01 -- Hville Thugg & X -- 35 Days 17. SPIDER NEKURA & THOTH -- 2/8/02 -- Edwin MacPhisto & "Grand Slam" Mark Stevens -- 79 Days 18. CHRIS RAYNOR (3) & EL LUCHADORE MAGNIFICO -- 4/28/02 -- Spider Nekura & Thoth -- 12 Days (9) 19. JAY DAWG & SACRED -- 5/10/02 -- Chris Raynor & El Luchadore Magnifico -- 28 Days 20. CHRIS WILSON (2) & STRYKE -- 6/7/02 -- Jay Dawg & Sacred -- 31 Days 21. CHRIS RAYNOR (4) & EDWIN MACPHISTO (2) -- 7/8/02 -- Chris Wilson & Stryke -- 35 Days 22. FROST & "TNT" TAYLOR NICHOLAS THOMPSON -- 8/12/02 -- Chris Raynor & Edwin MacPhisto -- 60 Days 23. CED ORDONEZ & THOTH (2) -- 10/11/02 -- Frost & "TNT" Taylor Nicholas Thompson -- 35 Days 24. FROST (2) & TOM FLESHER -- 11/22/02 -- Ced Ordonez & Mak Francis -- 101 Days (10) 25. EJIRO FASAKI & JUDGE MENTAL -- 3/16/03 -- Frost & Tom Flesher -- 117 Days 26. DACE NIGHT & VA'AIGA -- 7/11/03 -- Ejiro Fasaki & William Hearford -- 31 Days 27. QUIZ & SHOW -- 8/10/03 -- Dace Night & Va'aiga (11) -- 69 Days 28. EJIRO FASAKI (2) & JUDGE MENTAL (2) -- 10/18/03 -- Quiz & John Duran (12) -- 90 Days 29. JOHNNY DANGEROUS & WILDCHILD -- 1/16/04 -- Ejiro Fasaki & Judge Mental (13) -- 75 Days 30. TERRENCE 'JANUS' BAILEY & AECAS -- 3/31/04 -- Johnny Dangerous & Wildchild -- 14 Days 31. TODD CORTEZ & MIKE VAN SICLEN -- 4/14/04 -- Terrence 'Janus' Bailey & Aecas (14) -- 5 Days 32. JOHNNY DANGEROUS (2) & WILDCHILD (2) -- 4/19/04 -- Todd Cortez & Mike Van Siclen -- 6 Days 33. TERRENCE 'JANUS' BAILEY (2) & AECAS (2) -- 4/25/04 -- Todd Cortez & Mike Van Siclen (15) -- 19 Days 34. TODD CORTEZ (2) & MIKE VAN SICLEN (2) -- 5/14/04 -- Terrence 'Janus' Bailey & Aecas -- 128 Days 35. "HOLLYWOOD" SPIKE JENKINS & SEAN DAVIS -- 9/19/04 -- Todd Cortez & Mike Van Siclen -- 19 Days 36. CHRISTIAN FURY & DAVID CROSS -- 10/8/04 --"Hollywood" Spike Jenkins and Sean Davis -- 32 Days and counting (1) Claimed belts due to no competition (2) PDS won NTD's half on the belts, by defeating Curry Man (3) Rane/PDS handed over the titles at Genesis, as Jayson ruled no one could hold more than one belt. (4) Triple threat match, also involving FX for the vacant tag titles. (5) Rane retired, handing over his tag team belt to Axis (6) Triple Threat Casino Brawl, also involving Silencer/El Luchadore Magnifico (7) Mercury stripped Wilson and Thugg of the titles on July 17th, stating that Wilson couldn't hold more than one title. (8) This was for the vacant tag titles (9) This was a triple threat tag match also involving Erek Taylor & Munich. (10) Ced and Thoth were stripped of the titles on 11/15/02. This was a match for the vacant titles. (11) This was a triple threat tag match also involving CIA & Mak Francis. (12) John Duran was awarded half of the tag title belts on 10/03/03 following an injury to Show. (13) This was a four corners match also involving Janus & Dace Night and Va’aiga & John Duran. (14) This was a triple threat tag match also involving Tom Flesher & Ann Onita. (15) Terrence "Janus" Bailey & Aecas won the tag team titles in a four corners tag match triple fall match in which the third fall was for the tag team titles. The four teams involved were Toxxic & Jimmy "The Demon" Liston, Wildchild & Johnny Dangerous, Todd Cortez & Mike Van Siclen, and Terrence "Janus" Bailey & Aecas. Longest Title Reign - Todd Cortez & Mike Van Siclen, 128 days Most Title Reigns, team - Angelous & Molock, Ejiro Fasaki & Judge Mental, Johnny Dangerous & Wildchild, Terrence "Janus” Bailey & Aecas and Mike Van Siclen & Todd Cortez, 2 Most Title Reigns, individual - Chris Raynor, 4 Most Days with Title, team - Ejiro Fasaki & Judge Mental, 207 days Most Days with Title, individual - Ejiro Fasaki and Judge Mental, 207 days **** SWF HARDCORE GAMERS CHAMPIONSHIP **** 1. G.O.A.T. -- 09/20/00 -- N/A -- 3 Days (1) (2) 2. SPIKE -- 10/29/00 -- Mayor McCheese -- 17 Days (3) 3. NEILSEN OF THE JUNGLE -- 11/15/00 -- Spike -- 33 Days 4. GRIMEDOGG -- 01/08/01 -- Phoenix -- 60 Days (4) 5. PERFECT BO -- 03/09/01 -- Grimedogg -- 51 Days 6. SACRED -- 04/29/01 -- Perfect Bo -- 15 Days 7. GRUNGE -- 05/14/01 -- Sacred -- 4 Days (5) 8. CHRIS WILSON -- 05/18/01 -- Grunge -- 60 Days 9. SPARK -- 07/17/01 -- Chris Wilson -- 5 Days (6) 10. GRUNGE (2) -- 07/22/01 -- Spark -- 15 Days 11. FALLOUT -- 08/06/01 -- Grunge -- 13 Days 12. JOHNNY ROTTEN -- 08/19/01 -- Fallout -- 28 Days 13. GRIMEDOGG (2) -- 09/16/01 -- Johnny Rotten -- 12 Days 14. FALLOUT (2) -- 09/28/01 -- Grimedogg -- 23 Days (7) 15. MISTRESS SARAH -- 10/21/01 -- Fallout -- 27 Days (8) 16. X -- 11/16/01 -- Mistress Sarah -- 14 Days 17. MISTRESS SARAH (2) -- 11/30/01 -- X -- 14 Days 18. FALLOUT (3) -- 12/14/01 -- Mistress Sarah -- 19 Days 19. MUNICH -- 1/14/02 -- Fallout -- 6 Days 20. BOSTON STRANGLER -- 1/20/02 -- Munich -- 61 Days 21. MISTRESS SARAH (3) -- 3/22/02 -- Boston Strangler -- 9 Days 22. LONGDOGGER PETE -- 3/31/02 -- Mistress Sarah -- 28 Days 23. STRYKE -- 4/28/02 -- Longdogger Pete -- 28 Days 24. ASH KETCHUM -- 5/26/02 -- Stryke -- 9 Days 25. STRYKE (2) -- 6/4/02 -- Ash Ketchum -- 26 Days 26. ASH KETCHUM (2) -- 6/30/02 -- Stryke -- 8 Days 27. JAY DAWG -- 7/8/02 -- Ash Ketchum -- 83 Days 28. CED ORDONEZ -- 9/29/02 -- Mercury -- 8 Days (9) 29. FROST -- 10/7/02 -- Ced Ordonez -- 20 Days 30. ASH KETCHUM (3) -- 10/27/02 -- Frost -- 19 Days 31. ANNIE ECLECTIC -- 11/15/02 -- Ash Ketchum -- 25 Days 32. MICHAEL CRAVEN (4) -- 12/10/02 -- Annie Eclectic -- 21 days 33. JUDGE MENTAL -- 1/13/03 -- Michael Craven -- 77 days 34. MIKE VAN SICLEN -- 3/31/03 -- Judge Mental -- 4 Days (10) 35. WILDCHILD -- 4/4/03 -- Mike Van Siclen -- 5 Days 36. JANUS -- 4/9/03 -- n/a -- 9 days (11) 37. BEEZEL -- 4/18/03 -- Janus -- 18 days 38. JANUS (2) -- 5/4/03 -- Beezel -- 10 days 39. DACE NIGHT -- 5/14/03 -- Janus -- 39 days (12) 40. CIA -- 6/22/03 -- Dace Night -- 15 days 41. VA'AIGA -- 7/7/03 -- CIA -- 18 days 42. WILDCHILD (2) -- 7/25/03 -- Va'aiga -- 138 days 43. JANUS (3) -- 12/10/03 -- Wildchild -- 58 days 44. JOHN DURAN -- 2/6/04 -- Janus -- 14 days 45. AECAS -- 2/20/04 -- John Duran -- 16 days 46. TOXXIC -- 3/7/04 -- Aecas -- 49 days 47. JIMMY "THE DEMON" LISTON -- 4/25/04 -- Mike Van Siclen (13) -- 10 days 48. MIKE VAN SICLEN (2) -- 5/5/04 -- Jimmy “The Demon” Liston -- 54 days 49. RYAN DUSTIN -- 6/28/04 -- Mike Van Siclen -- 19 Days 50. MARTIN "BIG COUNTRY" HUNT -- 7/17/04 -- Ryan Dustin -- 15 Days 51. SEAN DAVIS -- 8/1/04 -- Martin "Big Country" Hunt -- 64 Days 52. CHRISTIAN FURY -- 10/4/04 -- Sean Davis -- 10 Days 53. SEAN DAVIS (2) --10/14/04 -- Christian Fury -- 4 Days 54. CARNAGE -- 10/18/04 -- Sean Davis -- 20 Days 55. CHRISTIAN FURY (2) -- 11/7/04 -- Carnage -- 2 Days and counting (1) G.O.A.T. claimed the vacant belt. (2) G.O.A.T. dropped the title upon becoming World Champion (3) Match for the vacant title (4) Triple threat match also involving Neilsen of the Jungle (5) Four way match, also involving Jay Dawg and Apostle (6) Triple threat match also involving Grimedogg (7) Triple threat elimination match also involving Chris Storm (8) Triple threat match with Jamie Bjork and the Light Heavyweight Title on the line as well (9) Jay Dawg was stripped of the title at Genesis 3, and Mercury took his place, challenging Ced Ordonez for the vacant title. (10) Triple threat match also involving Neilsen of the Jungle (11) Wildchild vacated the title on 4/9/03. This was a triple threat match for the vacant title, against Johnny Dangerous and Mike Van Siclen. (12) Triple threat match also involving Jay Dawg (13) Jimmy "The Demon" Liston won the HCG title in a four corners tag match triple fall match in which the second fall was for the HCG title. The four teams involved were Toxxic & Jimmy "The Demon" Liston, Wildchild & Johnny Dangerous, Todd Cortez & Mike Van Siclen, and Terrence "Janus" Bailey & Aecas. Longest Title Reign - Wildchild, 138 days Most Title Reigns - Ash Ketchum/Michael Craven, 4 Most Days with Title - Wildchild, 143 days **** SWF CRUISERWEIGHT CHAMPIONSHIP **** 1. WILDCHILD -- 2/1/04 -- Tom Flesher (1) -- 35 Days 2. ALAN CLARK -- 3/1/04 -- Wildchild -- 44 Days 3. JOHNNY DANGEROUS -- 4/14/04 -- Alan Clark -- 70 Days 4. AUSTIN SLY -- 6/23/04 -- Johnny Dangerous -- 19 Days 5. "HOLLYWOOD" SPIKE JENKINS -- 7/12/04 -- Austin Sly -- 14 Days 6. TOM FLESHER -- 7/26/04 -- Spike Jenkins -- 49 Days (2) 7. "THE REAL DEAL" RYAN DUSTIN -- 9/19/04 -- n/a -- 29 Days and counting (3) 8. "HOLLYWOOD" SPIKE JENKINS (2) -- 10/18/04 -- Ryan Dustin -- 22 Days and counting (1) This was a ladder match for the vacant title. (2) Tom Flesher was stripped of the title on 9/13/04, after walking out on a match with Ryan Dustin and the belt was held up. (3) This was a triple threat ladder match for the vacant title, also involving "Hollywood" Spike Jenkins and The Birdman. Longest Title Reign - Johnny Dangerous, 70 Days Most Title Reigns - Spike Jenkins, 2 Most Days with Title - Johnny Dangerous, 70 Days **** SWF WOMEN'S CHAMPIONSHIP **** 1. KELLY CONNELLY -- 10/13/04 -- n/a (1) -- 25 Days 2. MEGAN SKYE -- 11/7/04 -- Kelly Connelly -- 2 Days and counting (1) Kelly Connelly was given the belt as a present by Max King on October 13th. The first official defence of the belt occured on October 22nd, with Kelly retaining the title in a fourway dance against Ebony, Annie Eclectic and Megan Skye. Longest Title Reign - Kelly Connelly, 25 Days Most Title Reigns - Kelly Connelly and Megan Skye, 1 Most Days with Title - Kelly Connelly, 25 Days **** SWF LIGHT-HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPIONSHIP **** 1. MAYOR MCCHEESE -- 09/18/00 -- NTD -- 19 Days (1) 2. CURRY MAN -- 10/07/00 -- Mayor McCheese -- 22 Days 3. "INSANE" JOE FLYER -- 10/29/00 -- Curry Man -- 28 Days 4. MAYOR MCCHEESE (2) -- 11/26/00 -- "Insane" Joe Flyer -- 19 Days (2) (3) 5. BOBBY RILEY -- 12/17/00 -- Exploding Chicken -- 61 Days (4) 6. NEILSEN OF THE JUNGLE -- 03/09/01 -- Bobby Riley -- 45 Days (5) 7. SACRED -- 04/23/01 -- Neilsen of the Jungle -- 6 Days (6) 8. ANDREA MONTGOMERY -- 05/27/01 -- eXodus -- 40 Days (7) 9. EL LUCHADORE MAGNIFICO -- 07/06/01 -- Andrea Montgomery -- 8 Days 10. ANDREA MONTGOMERY (2) -- 07/14/01 -- El Luchadore Magnifico -- 8 Days 11. EL LUCHADORE MAGNIFICO (2) -- 7/22/01 -- Andrea Montgomery -- 56 Days (8) 12. JAMIE "KID BULLET" BJORK -- 09/16/01 -- El Luchadore Magnifico -- 35 Days 13. FALLOUT -- 10/21/01 -- Jamie Bjork -- 140 Days (9) 14. EL LUCHADORE MAGNIFICO (3) -- 3/22/02 -- Fallout -- 42 Days 15. EREK TAYLOR -- 5/3/02 -- El Luchadore Magnifico -- 23 Days 16. EL LUCHADORE MAGNIFICO (4) -- 5/26/02 -- Erek Taylor -- 63 Days 17. TOM FLESHER -- 7/28/02 -- El Luchadore Magnifico -- 68 Days 18. ANNIE ECLECTIC -- 10/4/02 -- Tom Flesher -- 35 Days (10) 19. EL LUCHADORE MAGNIFICO (5) -- 11/8/02 -- Annie Eclectic -- 4 Days (11) (1) This was for the vacant title. (2) Triple Threat match, also involving Exploding Chicken (3) Mayor McCheese was thought to be "killed" and his title was vacated (4) Ladder Match for the vacant title. (5) Triple Threat match, also involving Spike (6) At From the Fire (4/29/01), in a three title, three fall match, Grimedogg won the Light Heavyweight Title fall, however, he was over the limit, and the title became vacated. (7) Ladder Match for the vacant title. (8) Four way ladder match also involving Chris Storm and Mayor McCheese (9) Triple threat match with Mistress Sarah and the Hardcore Title on the line as well (10) Triple threat match also involving Tod deKindes (11) Triple threat match also involving Mak Francis. The Light-Heavyweight Title was suspended on 11/12/02. Longest Title Reign - Fallout, 140 Days Most Title Reigns - El Luchadore Magnifico, 5 Most Days with Title - El Luchadore Magnifico, 173 Days **** OVERALL STATS **** Longest Title Reigns 1. Fallout, 140 Days (LHW) 2. Wildchild, 138 Days (HC) 3. Todd Cortez and Mike Van Siclen, 128 Days (Tag) Most Title Reigns 1. El Luchadore Magnifico, 5 (LHW) 2. Chris Raynor, 4 (Tag) 2. Ash Ketchum/Michael Craven, 4 (HCG) Most Days with Title 1. El Luchadore Magnifico, 209 Days (World) 2. Ejiro Fasaki and Judge Mental, 207 Days (Tag) 3. Tom Flesher, 184 Days (World)

Right, if the #1 seed meets the #8 or #9 seed...does that mean #2 meets #7, #3 vs. #6 and #4 against #5. Or, is the seeding really only meant for numbers 1, 8 and 9.

Anyway, on Dames' original post... 1) Build from the bottom up. Nowadays, wrestling fans demand more than just a decent top-line match...they want a solid undercard to go with any main event now. This ain't boxing. The WWE name is the thing that draws fans now, not just the guy holding the belt. Things were different in years gone by when the main event was everything...times have changed. So if the creative team don't care about the undercard then the fans won't either, meaning the fans won't want to shell out money for shows. The cards need to appeal as much as possible from top to bottom. That means building up as many wrestlers as possible and making as many intriguing matches as possible. Which means no jobbers. Everyone on the roster should be percieved as either a threat or put across as at least having a chance. Putting Funaki in a match with JBL and not only having him get squashed, but having him described as a no-hoper by Cole and Tazz from the start does nobody any favours. As such, if Fuanki was said to have a chance at an upset, JBL beating him would look better in comparison. 2) Character, character, character. Say what you will about the cartoony eighties and nineties, but at least the Doink The Clowns stood out from the Shawn Michaelses, who stood out from the Papa Shangos. Now, everybody is the same. What exactly makes Chris Jericho different from Maven currently? They say the same things, have the same attitude, fight the same battles, like the same people. Nobody has a distinct character anymore. I'm not saying turn everyone into dentists and clowns again, but having 20 nice guy faces and 20 cocky heels on one roster is ridiculous. Have them do something to distinguish them from the pack. Even it means making the Angles goofy, the Jerichos parranoid, the Chavos insane, the Eddies cheat...whatever. Just make them different. 3) Learn how to book faces. As above, Chris Jericho has become such a generic face it's saddening to watch. He's not alone though. Every time a heel character gets over Vince sees the guy getting over, looks to capitalise on the popularity and turns them face. But once he turns them face, he has to change their character to be more 'facelike'. And as a result, they pander to the fans, start chumming up to the people they've feuded with for the past 5 months and they all mould into one stereotypical face character. It's happened to Jericho, Benjamin, Benoit. Eddie's character is too stupid now. Cena is a shell of his former self. Angle becomes the same terrible character every time he turns face. Does Rob Van Dam have any character left? What about Booker T? It happens EVERY time. The entertaining characters are all heels. Yet the biggest successes of recent years are Austin and Rock...both faces for most of their runs, both booked to stand out from the crowd, but different from your generic face. And both worked. 4) I liked Kahran's idea for Afterburn and Bottom Line, with the 'discussion table'. Putting a group of people together to dicuss the implications of matches, results and decisions gives more scope to innovate with them...than simply playing a video and saying 'hey, this happened on Thursday, so let's show you it again'. Plus, you give the retirees like Malenko and Tazz something to do by putting them on the panel some weeks. Putting a Heyman or a Long works too. Even bring in guests to the panel to discuss their actions. Also, I seem to remember them doing something like that around about 92. That led into Perfect's face-turn on Heenan. Using an Afterburn or Bottom Line to develop a 'lesser' feud would work wonders. 5) Go back to basics. Less interviews, less segments, less stipulations and less Crash TV. The reason the Attitude era's segments were effective because they were fresh. The reason being, they were implemented slowly. Now, they've grown stale. There are only so many ideas you can have as far as innovative segments go before you verge on the ridiculous (Concrete Crypt, car crashes, attempted murder)...and re-hashing angles has been proven to draw criticism. Turning Raw and Smackdown back into wrestling shows is the way to go. But you can;'t just suddenly get rid of all the interviews and you can't just start having 20 minute matches on the show regularly. Just as the fanbase had to be nurtured into the Attitude phase slowly, they need to be nurtured out of it. Making too many changes too soon will alienate the current fanbase and will seem too rushed to those the changes are trying to attract. The plan to emphasise the shows on wrestling, if it were to go ahead, should be done across a year rather than a couple of months.

Taking on Kido's point, the most prestigious US based title right now is probably the ROH Title...which has plenty of things going for it. One being the ranking system, combined with the #1 contenders trophy. You know roughly who is in line for a shot and you know who has the next title match. Plus, you have to EARN the shot at the title by winning a MATCH...not by bitching to the GM or getting a new gimmick. The big problem with the WWE and World Titles come when the belt is a secondary issue. For the belt to be made prestigious, it should be treated the way Trips treats it...like his life. The champs should not be defending the championship against someone simply because they don't like them. The belt must be issue of conflict number one, with everything else being an add-on from there. Also, make it so the titles are defended according to their importance. World Titles should be defended only on big stages, like in Japan. That way, you feel there's more of a chance of a title switch...where as nobody expects a T.V show switch anymore.

Angle didn't actually wrestle. He 'beat' two of the Tough Enough guys in matches. After they'd been tired out by doing squat thrusts of course. Gotta love those tough-guy WWE bullies getting shown up, eh?

I've been waiting for a battle royal for so long and now, it has come. Allow me to cry tears of joy. I'll also be promoing of course.

Okay, I'm actually going to read through this fucker and try to give actual feedback this time. For now though, two title wins in one night has to be a record, right?

EDIT: Double Post. And it's actually 13,798.

And I'm done with... Women's Match- 5,689 Royal Beatings- 8,109 (with rushed, tacked on ending) So that's a combined 13,789. And all this with my updated medical condition (which I'll post something on tommorrow maybe, for reference), I'm knackered.

Uhm, Vince is cutting costs, right? Why would he give money to TNA?

X-Division Title, Sudden Death Three Way Dance (with no dancing...or, well, maybe just a little...) Leon Rodez vs. Scotty Static vs. Johnny "Jam" Jackson Also, maybe something with The GBA.

Yeah, and video it so we can have some of the elder statesmen of the board judge who the winner of...whatever you're fighting over...really is. Otherwise it's pretty worthless.

Hmm...seems to me you should scroll down the board and check out the SWF. You might do pretty well judging by this.

Has anyone done the 'they'll all be back with the new ECW' joke yet? If not, then *insert joke here*.

1) Dark Match The Mountie defeated Hardcore Holly in 5:36 (1/2*) Mountie countered the Alabama Slam and spiked Holly with a pulling piledriver to get the victory. - It's live, it's Pay Per View. It's First Blood! Joey Styles and Mike Tenay are sat at ringside ready for the biggest night in the UWE's history and tonight, they'll be joined by a special guest at ringside. A true legend of the wrestling world. A man who wrestled extensively for the WWE and gained a worldwide reputation during his time there. Ladies and gentlemen...THE BERZERKER! - We cut away from Berzerker's entrance however, as backstage Clockwork Violence are just entering the arena. 1) Triple Threat Elimination Match for the Television Title #1 Contendership Jamie Noble defeated 'The Loose Cannon' Brian Pillman and 'The Fallen Angel' Christopher Daniels in 12:38 (***) These three men kicked off the show with a bang. Daniels and Noble brawled for the first portion of the match while Pillman calmly sat in the corner and watched the match unfold, not getting involved despite verbal abuse from both men at various points. Eventually though, as Daniels went for the Angel's Wings, Pillman saw his chance...only to be double-teamed by Daniels and Noble, eventually taking Angel's Wings himself and getting pinned at 6:19! The match continued on, as Pillman was escorted away by numerous officials. Both men traded move after move, reversal after reversal, until Noble locked Daniels in the seated front dragon sleeper. Locked in the centre of the ring, Daniels fought the hold but eventually passed out at the 12:38 point and the bell was rung. - Tenay and Styles comment on what a great start to the show the last match was. Berzerker says HUSS! 2) Carribean Strap Match La Parka beat Savio Vega in 7:19 (3/4*) After many near-sequences, both men were on three turnbuckle touches when suddenly Carlito Carribean Cool ran in and went to spit the apple into the eyes of Parka. He ducked though and Vega took the apple to the eyes. Parka quickly got rid of Carlito, before touching turnbuckle four for the victory. - Josh Matthews interviewed Randy Orton, who was unhappy at not being on the card. He vowed to make an impact tonight. - The Berzerker thank the show's sponsors, Huss. Which confuses Joey Styles no end. 3) Singles Match Sid Vicious defeated Masahiro Chono in 9:28 (*3/4) Chono fared surprisingly well against Big Sid, working on the right leg to eliminate the height difference. But Sid eventually ducked a LARIATOOOOO~! attempt and Chokeslammed Chono to turn the tide, before hitting the Powerbomb a minute later to score the pinfall victory. - The DDR Tournament continues! Yes, backstage, the semi finals took place with special judges to determine who'd go into the final. The expert judges assembled were Sunny, Josh Matthews and Torrie Wilson. First up, La Parka defeated Dean Malenko (sporting a neckbrace), when Malenko vacated the stage to chase off Danny Doring who was watching on. In the second semi, The Blue Meanie beat Brian Knobbs. Sunny voted for Knobbs (who sucked), but Matthews disagreed. It was Torrie Wilson casting the deciding vote to give her man Meanie the win. The Nastys attacked Meanie after the decision, before giving Torrie the Pitstop. 4) Singles Match 'Dangerous' Danny Doring defeated Dean Malenko in 6:48 (**) Playing the face role, Malenko survived focused work on his neck and had Doring wrapped in the Cloverleaf. But with JJ Dillon distracting referee Hebner, Barry Windham ran out and nailed Malenko with a Lariat. Doring got the win as a result. - Dillon and Windham were confronted as they got through the curtains by Gene Okerlund. Dillon claimed that Malenko made the biggest mistake of his life by claiming there were more important things in the UWE than the Midnight Horsemen and he paid for it, at the hands of the fourth Horsemen, Barry Windham. - A video rolled, previewing the upcoming debut of a new tag team...The Straight Edge Assasins, CM Punk and his new protegé Johnny Stamboli. Punk begins to talk of his intentions to rid the UWE of it's wrongs, but has to stop midway through to get Stamboli to put his cigar out. Expect hilarity to ensue in a few weeks' time. 5) Singles Match 'Da Bad Guy' Scott Hall defeated Sean O'Haire by DQ in 8:10 A heated match that deserved a better ending than Randy Orton running in an RKOing O'Haire. A two-on-one beatdown started up post-match, until ROAD WARRIOR ANIMAL ran down the aisle and cleared house to a booming reaction! Orton and O'Haire retreated, as Animal grabbed the mic and challenged Orton and O'Haire to a match next week against the UWE's newest tag team...The Road Siders! - Backstage, Christopher Daniels is lying face-down in a pool of his own blood, which has created quite a crowd backstage. Eventually through the crowd pushes Dustin Rhodes, claiming that 'he'd take things from here...this is officially a crime scene'. Everyone shrugged their shoulders and walked off. He checked on Daniels and pulled out what looked to be a piece of cardboard with a piece of glass taped onto it. Rhodes looks through the glass, spotting a pair of very familar sunglasses and picking them up. With a smile, Rhodes nods and walks off...leaving Daniels groaning on the concrete floor. - Stevie Richards was furious that there were now six men ready to fight against Clockwork Violence, rendering his stable's numbers advantage useless. 6) UWE Television Championship Match Rey Mysterio © beat Paul London in 16:29 (****1/4) What a match! A real aerial display from both men with some really close nearfalls. Eventually, Mysterio got his knees up on a London's Calling attempt and cradled him over with a hurricanrana for the pinfall. Post match, Jamie Noble and then Brian Pillman tried to attack the two men, only for Dustin Rhodes to run out with the cops! The cops quickly cuffed Pillman and dragged him off, Rhodes walking with them all the way, as Rey and London eventually fought Noble off and shook hands. - Meanwhile, Pillman was carted off by the rozzers. Rhodes waved him off before commenting on another job well done. 7) Extreme Rules Sixman Tag Team Match The Midnight Horsemen beat The New Gangsta-Nators and Jerry Lynn in 8:28 (*) The Extreme Rules saw New Jack bring out 'tha plundah' or, the 'HUSS!'...depending on which commentator you listened to. Obviously the former ECW trio had the advantage in that environment and even a run-in from Barry Windham didn't stop them, as Dean Malenko was quickly out to make the save. However, eventually Saturn took an Anderson Spinebuster on a trash can...and as Lynn and Anderson brawled to the floor, Eaton hit the Alabama Jam and got the victory. 8) Fourway Elimination Match for the UWE Universal Championship Randy Savage outlasted 'The Heartbreak Kid' Shawn Michaels, Ken Shamrock and Sting at 20:48 (**1/2) The first fall saw the three faces teaming up on Savage until he bailed from the ring, at which point Shamrock went to work on Michaels and Sting. That turned the match into a fully-fledged fourway dance. At one point, Sting had the Scorpion Deathlock on Shamrock while he had the Ankle Lock on Savage, with neither tapping. The first elimination came when the masked man from last week ran into the ring and clocked Sting with the pipe. Michaels was up too, but the masked man didn't go after him for some reason. Savage got the pin on Sting a short while later at 8:37. Into the second fall and again, Michaels and Shamrock teamed up to take on Savage and nearly eliminated him when Shamrock had the Ankle Lock on. But Savage reached the ropes. The double-teaming continued for a few minutes more but Savage wouldn't stay down. So eventually, Michaels turned around and hit Sweet Chin Music on Shamrock and eliminated him instead at the 12:12 mark. That left Randy Savage and Shawn Michaels to do battle over the Universal Championship, which they sure did. Michaels nearly stole the win with a rolling cradle which got a CLOSE nearfall...which started off a chain of run-ins. Out came the other five members of Clockwork Violence. Only for Sid, Hall, Animal and Shamrock to run out and brawl with them around ringside. Sting then came out to help, but suddenly, here comes the masked man...and Sting chases him through the crowd. As the brawl continued on the floor, HBK missed Sweet Chin Music and took a lowblow from Savage. Savage quickly set up Michaels for a piledriver, waiting for Stevie to slide a chair in before spiking HBK on the steel! Richards pulled the chair back out as Savage hit the Top Rope Elbow, made the cover and got the three to become the first-ever UWE Universal Champion! We go off the air with the faces attending to HBK, while Clockwork Violence celebrate. Next Week- The RoadSiders vs. Orton and O'Haire Sid vs. The Mountie La Parka vs. Carlito Carribean Cool

Fire: Tyson Tomko, Hardcore Holly, Bill DeMott I take it we're not being realistic with who gets hired here, so... Hire: Samoa Joe (Smackdown!), CM Punk (Smackdown!), Doug Williams (RAW)

Is Zack away or something? If not, Zack, answer your PMs buddy. Thank you.

No... It's still in an arena with bunches of people and the same set up as a normal arena (unless MEN is totally different than what I'm thinking... Toxx? A little help here?). The props are set up like a church... But they're just that. Props. Cleared up for ya now? Yes. To clarify, the MEN is a regular indoor arena. Carnage, the bit about the church relates to the way the entrance way and stage is set-up for the entire show rather than being specific to your match...in the WWE uses different stages for Pay Per Views, we do too.