King Cucaracha

Thanks guys, much appreciated. The rest of the stuff is, hopefully, gonna get explained on the coming show. Meanwhile, as I haven't said it here big congrats to Johnny on winning the 'big one' and here's hoping we see the big re-match at Genesis because I smell money from that one.

I'll put this here again, incase someone sees it amongst the usual arguements. Guys...we've just had a GREAT show, with big developments and a new SWF World Heavyweight Champion. So far, the thread has consisted of Candace complaining about Flesher's match and discussion over the MI Slam being using in the main event. Johnny can't go back and change his match. What's done is done. Whever it was right or wrong, it's done. Toxxic will make the most of what happened no doubt, despite it going against his character. Again, Johnny can't just say 'fuck it, I'll change the ending'...so really, all discussing this is doing is taking away from what was one of our more impressive shows recently. And yes, I'll be commenting as soon as I get time. Hopefully by then, someone will have thoughts on my story or anything over than the MI Slam.

this was a pretty stupid ass post, but your pic in the sig somehow added to the entertainment value. Just don't post stupid shit like that again. KJ KJ Brackish Group: Members

Selfish or not, Angle's just being smart. He knows he's a favorite of Vince's and he's just continuing the time-honored tradition of the business...getting to the top, doing everything in your power to stay there and helping your friends out along the way. Look at the list of the long reigning main eventers and try to pick out 5 or more guys who haven't used or attempted to use politics for personal gain (since the business has become 'worked' that is, obviously). Heck, if wasn't using politics, then I'm sure Angle would be a great candidate for making Heidenreich look good.

No comment.

1) Anyone see The Nevilles in that thunder-storm clip on Soccer AM? Funny shit. 2) Chris Kamara is a pure legend. 3) Man U 2, Norwich 1. Lucky escape considering a loss would have left us rock bottom on 0 points after 2 games. Thank goodness for Alan Smith.

{Well, my vote still goes for Supes' uniquie take on Wrathapalooza's Korgath/Tybalt DNS. It's Gold Jerry, GOLD~! Yes...it really is good enough to warrant a cliché that bad.} Funyon: This match is of teh koolz! Axis: Oh I can't wait! My pants are ejaculating! King: So are my shoes! Ominous voice from above: THE CAGE. CAGE CAGE CAGE CAGE OF DEATH DOOM AND TRAMPOLINE FREEDOM CAAAAAAAAAAAAGE!!! Both guyz are in EL RING ready to fight and the bell rings! Korgath waddles around and Minnesota boos him! And Tybalt bites his thumb hard and a pediatrician tells him that biting your nails can lead to ringworms! And everyone laughs! Axis: What is a pediatrician doing on the field? LOL King: ROFLMAO. So Tybalt says "FUCK YOU!" and he punches him THROUGH THE CAGE AND HE FALLS ONTO A BASEBALL AND IMPALES HIMSELF. Crowd: "HOLY COW! HOLY COW! HOLY COW!" So Korgath tries to leap on the trampoline but he's so FAT that he breaks a hole in the TRAMP O-line LOL! So now he's all "I'm wallowing in both mediocrity AND in this trampoline which is slowly conforming to my waist! And Tybalt starts bouncing bouncing bouncing and in the air he does A FULL OMG FULL SEVEN HUNDRED THOUSAND AND TWENTY THREE DEGREE SPLASH BUT HE LANDS RIGHT ON HIS HEAD OMG HE COULD BE DEAD DYING AND DISEASED SOMEONE GET A PEDIATRICIAN ON THE FIELD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! So both men are down and the trampoline isn't even BOUNCING! BUT THEN KORGATH BEGINS TO VIOLENTLY SHAKE AND CONVULSE. HE BEGINS... TO MUTATE. Korgath: G.................. O...................................... R................................................ O............................................................................... .... "GOROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!" Axis: OMG! IT'S GORO! HE JUST MORPHED! King: I CAN'T BELIEVE IT! I CAN'T BELIEVE MY EYES SO I'M WAVING MY HAND IN FRONT OF MY EYES TO SEE IF I'M IMAGINING THIS BUT I'M NOT AND IT'S REALLY HAPPENINGZ!!!!!!!! GORO CLAWS HIS WAY OUT OF THE CAGE AND BEGINS DOING AN ARMBAR ON TYBALT SINCE GORO BEINGZ SERIOUS TECHNICAL WRESTLERZ~! HE THEN JUMPS UP AND DOES A SHOOOOTING STAR BACKRAKE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AND HE ROARS " GORO TORO MORO BORO GORO OORO GOROOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" and in Goro language this means "Happy Birthday Galatea!" So everyone is cheeringz for G0R0 to ESCAPE but he CAN'T because he's TOO BIG!! Random Man That Happens to Work At A Museum: He could be worth MILLIONZ! So they capture G0R0 with a big tranquilizer gun and net him up and carry him away to New Yawk City! *SWIM SWIM SWIM SWIM SWIM* RMTHTWAAM: We're in NYC! G0R0 goes up on display! G0R0: GORO OROG ROGO RGOO!!!! (ROAR I'M GOING TO KILL NEW YORK CITY!) So G0R0 KILLS everyone and has SEX WITH THEIR WIVES ANALLY and CLIMBS UP TO THE EMPIRE STATE BUILDING! HE SCREAMS!! G0R0: GORO ORGO ORGO ORGO GORO ROOG GROO!!!!!! (Superstar wrote this match and he is superior to EVERYONE!) Then Korgath WAKES UP and he's all "Aww man it was only a dream!" and he goes on his COMPUTER! And something pops up! "Take This Quiz! What Embarrassing SWF/JL Moment Are You?" TYPE TYPE TYPE "You are...No-Showing a Gigantically Large SJL PPV-type Event! People are disappointed, but they still laugh at you since The Superstar gets to type up a hilarious replacement match!" Axis: LOL King: What are we doing here? Axis: Where's my pants lol. THIS MATCH BROUGHT TO YOU BY THE NEWWWWWWWWWW IGNWF WHICH IS 2000000000 TIMES BETTER THAN THE SWF. VISIT THEM ONLY IF U HAVE INSIDER.

{Word Count is your friend folks. Yep, I went considerably over...apologies for the odd looking tags and stuff, but here's my match.} *BOOM! BOOM! BOOM! BOOM! BOOM!* STORM!!! "YEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!" The pyrotechnics bring the fans converged on San Antonio's Alamo Dome to their feet, cheering wildly for no reason other than they can! The stage is set, the ring is erected, the spandex is on and yes...it's SWF Storm! "Hello everyone and WELCOME to SWF STOOOORRRRRM!" Cyclone Comet booms, hyped and ready to roll. "I am CYCLOOOOOOOONNEEEEEE COMET and alongside me is Robert Riley, and Robert we have a great night of action ahead of us here in the Alamo!" "First off fruitbowl, it's BOBBY Riley. And secondly...I hope we can agree to put all jokes about the Alamo aside for the duration of tonight's show. Or at least until we run out of material." "Which shouldn't take long. Anyway, a huge night in store...the Cruiserweight Title is on the line. The Eastern United States Title is resurrected tonight. Of course, Johnny Dangerous has the chance to become the World Heavyweight Champion, in probably the biggest match of his career..." "Bah!" "We have contendership matches, grudge matches and all in all a magnificent card...and what a way to kick it off. Hardcore rules Robert! Landon Maddix in action against the Straight Edger..." "Toxxic?" "No...the other one." "Spike?" "...the one with talent." "Davis?" "No, one half of the Tag Team Champions, To..." "Van Siclen?" "No...the other one." "Masked Man?" "He's not a Tag Team Champion!" "He was..." "No...it's Todd Co..." "TODD ROYAL!?! HALLELUJAH~!" "....." "PREPARE...FOR...LANDON!" ...WAAAAAHHHHH... *DUM DUM* "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" "I never thought I'd be pleased to hear that music." Comet sighs. Obviously as fired up as Comet is, or was before Riley killed his buzz, Landon Maddix bursts through the curtains as the boos pick up instantly. With his ICTV Championship belt already unstraped and raised high above his head, Maddix grins from ear to ear as Chris Card and Natasha emerge behind him. "Ladies and gentlemen, the following non title contest is scheduled for one fall and will be fought under HARDCORE RULES!" "RRAAAAAAAHHHH!" "Introducing first at this time. Being accompanied to the ring by Chris Card and Natasha, he is the SWF Intercontinental Television Champion. From Huron, South Dakota. He weighs two hundred and ten pounds... LAAAAANDOOOOOON! "LA CUCARACHA!" MAAAAAADDIIIIIIIXXXXXX!!!" Maddix again hoists his belt proudly in the air as the crowd again jeer the perrenial rule-breaker, even though they're wanting rules to be broken in the upcoming match. Card and Natasha watch on and applaud their man, as Maddix walks on down the aisle towards the ring. "No Megan Skye again." Comet says curiously. "Maybe this has something to do with that cam..." "Ah-buh-buh! We agreed not to mention that!" "But I..." "I repeat, Ah-buh-buh..." "Fine." Maddix reaches the ring and slides his title belt in and begins to climb onto the apron, but stops halfway and shakes his head for some reason. Jumping back off the apron, with the grin still plastered on his face, Maddix drops to a crouch and throws up the ring-skirt to a pop from the crowd and begins to rummage underneath the ring. A few moments pass, before Maddix finally re-emerges clutching a singapore cane in his right hand, raising it into the air with a wry smile. "And it seems Landon Maddix is ready to go hardcore tonight!" Comet exclaims. "He may have to be Comet, because I'm sure Cortez will be equally prepared for this match and all it entails." With the cane clutched firmly in his hand, Landon rolls into the ring... ...just as "Tres Delinquentes" (Rock Remix) by Delinquent Habits hits and Todd Cortez emerges through the curtains to a more favorable reaction than his opponent's, but certainly not a 'positive' one. Stopping at the top of the ramp, Cortez locks his arms in the straight edger's "X" symbol. Getting another mixed reaction, Cortez glares out towards them before removing his SWF Tag Team Championship belt and raising it above his head. "And his opponent. Hailing from 'The Streets'...he weighs in at two hundred and twenty six pounds. One half of the SWF WORLD Tag Team Champions! He is the "Urban Legend"... TOOOOOOOODD COOOOORRRRRRTEEZZZZZZZ!!!" Dropping the belt back over his shoulder, Cortez begins to stroll down the ramp. "A lot has gone down in recent weeks concerning this man." sums up Comet. "But tonight is a chance to put all of that behind him and concentrate on himself again. A win here puts him right in ICTV Title contention." Clearly not worried by the weapon in Maddix's hand, Cortez reaches the apron and leaps up to Landon's level...glaring at the youngster, who grins back nonchalantly. A stand-off ensues, until finally Maddix mouths the words "bring it on, big boy", with only the slightest hint of homo-eroticism. And Cortez promptly does, entering the ring. Suddenly Maddix charges forward and swings hurriedly with the cane, which misses the ducking Cortez and strikes the ring ropes. Maddix reacts and wheels around, but Cortez is a step ahead and boots Maddix in the gut...hard enough for him to drop the cane. "Citizen Cortez doesn't want to be in a weapons battle here..." "Not least because he doesn't HAVE a weapon." sighs Riley. "Dumbass." *DING DING DING!* Finally referee Sexton "Hardcore" Hardcastle, who had been watching the action unfold, calls for the bell. Meanwhile, Cortez has Landon backed up against the ropes and drives a knee into the gut. Another follows moments later, before Cortez pulls Landon out from the ropes. Landon breaks loose from Todd's grasp though, ducking behind him and pushing him forwards towards the corner. Hitting the turnbuckles sternum first Todd staggers back, as Landon runs past him and hits the near ropes...but gets caught, getting viciously whipped around and powerslammed to the mat! "Very nice from Cortez!" gasps Comet. "The power advantage he has tonight may be a big key to success for the Tag Team Champion." Rolling off of Maddix, Cortez balls up his fist, ready to strike. But suddenly, the singapore cane laying a few feet away from him catches his eye and he turns to go for it. That's all the opening Maddix needs though, to reach up and pull Todd over with a schoolboy roll-up... ONE! T... Quick kickout by Cortez, who rolls through to his feet. Maddix does the same and both men begin to charge, heading straight towards each other. The ICTV Champion hesitates slightly, but Cortez does not however and mows straight through Maddix with a big-time shoulder block! Maddix goes flying across the ring, with Cortez right on his tail and quick to boot him in the back of the head. On the defensive suddenly, Landon tries to roll away from danger but Cortez quickly grabs a handful of Maddix's hair, using that to drag him to his feet... "OOOOF!" ...before clubbing him across the chest with a forearm. The force sends Maddix stumbling backwards, into the ropes which inconveniently take him in and leave his arms tied up in the top and middle strands! "Well, this isn't good." Comet understates. "No shit, Sherlock." With his opponent 'temporarily occupied', Cortez contemplates his next move for all of a split-second, before moving in on Maddix and drilling him with another knee. Referee Hardcastle tries to move in and free Maddix. But Cortez is under no requirement to let him, so stands over Maddix and pounds him across the head with a series of right hands. Eight, nine and finally ten connect, all un-protectable on Landon's part. Finally Todd backs off now, allowing "Hardcore" Harcastle to wrench Maddix free from the ropes. In the meantime, Cortez looks around the ring again and finds the singapore cane...fighting back a smile, as he bends down and grabs the weapon. "YEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!" Finally Maddix is free from the ropes, and stumbles out towards the centre of the ring... *THWACK!* ...where he gets lashed over the head with the cane! Maddix, already groggy from the punches, goes down easily. Cortez meanwhile drops the cane for some reason, before pulling Maddix into a 'straighter' position and dropping a knee across the forehead. Suitably happy, Cortez turns from Maddix and runs to the ropes, leaping to the middle strand and using that to shoot back with a Quebrada moonsault... ...but Maddix gets the knees up! "That may have been a mistake thought!" Comet booms. "Cortez had the match going his way, but took an early chance and paid the price." "Yeah...he should leave the flying to Landon Maddix." Holding his gut, Cortez manages to remain on his feet but clearly feels the effects of the counter. Maddix meanwhile is back up to and breaks into a sprint towards Cortez, only to run straight into a clothesline! "But Citizen Cortez right back on the offense. It'll take more than that to keep this kid down!" Rocked, Maddix gets right back to his feet but wobbles around aimlessly. Until that is he finds Cortez, or more specifically a forearm to the jaw and then one across the chest. Stopping on the spot, it seems Maddix is all out of ideas, as Cortez takes his sweet time about hitting another, harder forearm to the jaw. Down goes the ICTV Champion again, bringing a look of worry to the faces of Card and Natasha. "LANDON SUCKS! LANDON SUCKS! LANDON SUCKS!" Meanwhile, the crowd seem pretty happy about the way things are going, as Cortez waits for Maddix to get back up. Slowly he does so, stumbling back a couple of steps as he does. Todd instantly runs in and forces Landon back into the ropes, before whipping him forcefully across the ring. Hitting the ropes, Maddix tries to hang onto the top strand...but mis-times his grab and careers back, into a STIFF back elbow from Cortez! "It seems Cortez is taking out his Masked Man/Van Siclen orientated frustrations here tonight." observes Comet. "Which is bad for Landon Maddix, because you can be sure Cortez has a LOT of pent-up frustration left in him." "Well, definately. He's got the man who made him who he is today and some fruity Romanian fighting over him like two lovestruck teen drama-queens." "So, you're calling Mike Van Siclen a drama queen?" "...let's just call the action, huh?" Cortez now has Maddix back up, taking his time over moving him towards the corner. Once close enough, Cortez throws the ICTV Champion face-first into the top turnbuckle. Maddix recoils on impact and stumbles back past Cortez, who hops to the middle rope and lines up Maddix. Slowly he begins to turn around, as Todd stands tall on the middle rope and suddenly springs forward. But Landon sees Todd early out of the corner of his eye, and is ready prepared for the oncoming Cortez with a Dropsault! Cortez hits the mat hard, before Maddix hits Cortez with the 'sault' part of the move and remains in a lateral press... ONE! TWO! KICKOUT! Quickly Landon is back up to his feet, encouraging Todd to get up with him. The Tag Team Champion slowly begins to comply, as Maddix begins to hop impatiently from foot to foot, waiting for an opportunity to strike. Finally Cortez does get and and turns around, prompting Maddix to charge in. But yet again, Cortez has anticipated the charge and counters, this time with a Judo style arm-drag throw. "It's a good job this isn't Judo, or this one would be over!" gasps Riley. "...not to mention if it were Judo, we'd have no idea what the hoo-hah was going on." "You make it sound like you have an idea what's going on as it is." Shocked, Maddix gets back up pretty quickly, but takes a stiff palm strike, with Cortez stepping forward with the strike to add more impact. Back into the buckles staggers Maddix, as Cortez steps in and kicks him hard in the ribs...not once, or twice, but three consecutive times. Wearily Landon takes a few steps out of the corner, before dropping with a grimace to his knees... "UURRRRRRGHHHHHH!" "OOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!" ...but raises his arm up between Cortez's legs, with as blatant of a lowblow as you're ever likely to see. Hardcastle off course doesn't call for the bell, because he's "HARDCOOORRREEE" Hardcastle...plus, there's No DQ's. Duh. "Well, just like the Submissions Match earlier in the week...Citizen Maddix takes advantage of the No Disqualification rulings and hits a blatant lowblow. And, unfortunately, there's nothing that can be done about it." As Cortez doubles over trying to regain his breath, Maddix turns away from his opponent and to Card on the floor, holding his hands out to signal that he wants something. Looking a little hesitant, Card shrugs his shoulders...but Landon makes the signal again and finally Card reacts and runs over to the timekeeper's table. Meanwhile, Todd has staggered back over towards Maddix, but takes a back elbow from "La Cucaracha", who then turns on his heels and steps behind Todd. Taking a hold of the Tag Champion's head, Maddix sits out and drives him down with So-Dak Moment... ...as Card has now got a steel chair in his hands. "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" The crowd don't like what they're seeing, as Maddix gets back up and holds out his hands. Card throws the chair into the ring, with all the accuracy of an American basketball player, as the chair sails over "La Cucaracha"s head. But luckily, Cortez is still down, which allows Maddix to scamper over and take possession of the chair. Turning to Card, Landon scowls at him as Todd begins to drag himself back to his feet. "It didn't take too long for the hangers-on to become involved, eh?" sighs Comet. "Hey, it's Hardcore Rules." shrugs Riley. "If Card wanted to, he could be in the ring kicking Cortez's ass right now himself." "Phff...maybe five years ago." Slowly Todd gets back to his feet and turns... *CRACK!* ...to be met with a stiff steel chair shot... *CRACK!* ...and a second, putting Todd flat on his back! Quickly dropping the chair, Landon yells at Hardcastle as he makes a hurried cover... ONE! TWO! SHOULDERUP! "Landon seems to want this over and done with, as quickly as possibl...and there's another cover!" ONE! TWO! KICKOUT! Getting slightly frustrated, Maddix grabs the chair again as he gets to his feet, opening it up and setting it in the middle of the ring. Cortez begins to get back up, helped by Maddix and dragged across towards the ropes. With a late reaction Cortez pulls his arm away from Maddix's grip and prepares to strike... ...but gets a thumb to the eye... *SLAP!* "WHOOOOO!" ...and a hard knifedge chop! *SLAP!* "WHOOOOO!" ...followed up by a second. "Stinging knifedges." observes Comet. "DAYAM~ right! They're not just there so the crowd can make stupid noises either Comet. Those suckas hurt like hell." With Cortez now winded up against the ropes, Landon pops him with a snap jab before sending Cortez off the ropes. Bypassing the chair, Todd hits the opposite ropes. Meanwhile Maddix charges forwards and towards the ropes, using that as a springboard to launch through the air with SERIOUS hang-time on a crossbody... ...which Cortez effortlessly ducks under, causing Landon to hit nothing but canvas! "Oh man! Bad Landon for landing!" gasps Riley. "Huh?" Maddix bounces off the mat like a rubber-ball, holding his ribs again as he stumbles towards Cortez. In desperation Maddix swings with a punch, but Todd ducks that and hooks up Landon for a back suplex. But at the apex of the move Cortex suddenly stops, bringing Maddix back down groin first across the back of the open chair!!!!! "OOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHH!" The crowd feel Landon's pain, as he sits crotched across the top of the chair. Meanwhile Cortez takes a moment to check his forehead for blood, finding none despite the stiff chair-shots he has taken. With that out of the way, Cortez turns back to Maddix... *SLAP!* "WHOOOOO!" ...and lashing him with a knifedge chop. "I suspect the tide of this match may have turned once more!" says Comet with gusto. "That is why Landon is looking to finish this match at the first possible opportunity." Landon teeters for a moment, but remains crotched on the chair. Meanwhile Todd backs off the ropes, coming back and hitting Maddix with a spinning heel kick...using his left leg rather than the right, so as to avoid the seat of the chair...that sends he and the chair toppling over. "KICK HIS ASS!" *clapclap* "KICK HIS ASS COR - TEZ, KICK HIS ASS!" *clapclap* "Listen to this crowd Robert! They're actually getting behind Todd Cortez here!" "Nah. They'd be chanting that whoever was in the ring." "Even you!?!" "Hey, I'm a heat machine baby!" "...COVER BY CORTEZ!" ONE! TWO! KICKOUT! This time it's Todd who's slightly peeved with "Hardcore" Hardcastle, but he decides not to act on his frustrations and instead goes after the steel chair. Quickly he grabs it, walking over to the corner and lodging the steel between the middle and top turnbuckles...before rolling out of the ring. Card and Natasha scurry off, as Cortez brushes past them and walks over to the announce table... "Oh crap..." ...and grabs the chair next to Riley, flashing a brief smile at him before turning back to the ring. "...see! Everybody loves Bobby Riley!" "Only those with male genitals...ironic that." Todd slides in with the chair, as Maddix gets back to his feet. The little Cucarachas are clearly still bothering Landon as he turns around, each step made as gingerly as possible, as he looks to move towards Cortez. Quickly Cortez adjusts the grip on his chair, stabbing forward with the weapon and driving the steel into the ribs of Maddix! The ICTV Champion doubles over, as Todd stabs the chair into the ribs a second time before dropping that weapon and irish whipping Maddix towards the corner... *CRACK!* ...backfirst into the chair propped in the corner! Back into the corner he collapses though, as Cortez picks up the second chair and moves in on Maddix. Unable to make a move out of the corner, Maddix finds the second chair being placed in between the second and top ropes in front of his chest...but finally he is able to jab Todd in the face. "Exhaustion is setting in here and this match may come down to a battle of reserve energy." Comet predicts. "Well, both guys have been smacked in the balls and smashed in the ribs...so, obviously they're not holding the oxygen that they usually would. But, I've got faith." "In?" "Todd." "You're rooting for Cortez?" "No! Todd Royal, you dolt!" "...whatever happened to that guy anyway?" "He's still here Comet. It's like people say, 'Todd is everywhere'." Back in the ring, Maddix has followed up his jab with a series more which have rocked Cortez out of the corner and towards the centre of the ring. Finally finishing up with the jabbing, Landon decides it's time for some more high impact offense and turns to grab the chair which Todd had dropped. But suddenly Cortez lunges forward, grabbing Landon around the waist and snapping back with a backdrop... FOLDING MADDIX UP LIKE A GOD-DAMN ACCORDIAN!!!! "Sweet Methusela!" gasps...well, guess who. "That may be all she wrote!" "I didn't know Methusela was a writer." "HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT!" The crowd suddenly burst into life as Maddix remains folded up in the centre of the ring, with the lower half of his body hanging over the top at a horrific angle. Finally gravity takes over and he flops face-first to the mat. Cortez sees it and looks a little apologetic for what he had seemingly done...but only briefly, before strolling over to Maddix and cruely kicking him in the rib area. Again he drives a kick in, before casually rolling Landon onto his back with the foot and dropping a quick, sharp elbow to the gut...remaining there for a casual cover... ONE! Cortez finally hooks the leg with a 'proper' cover... TWO! THR... KICKOUT! "Somehow Citizen Maddix is still in this match, but that vicious Japanese inspired backdrop has certainly done it's damage." "Definately." Riley sighs. "He could have broken Maddix's neck with that. Danny Williams would be proud...I still can't believe he beat Tyson." "*sighs*" With the sick backdrop still affecting him, Maddix can only make it to his knees before he can get no further. Meanwhile Todd is back on his feet, preparing his next move. To the side of him lays the singapore cane from earlier, which Cortez picks up and stares at for a moment. Meanwhile Landon makes a further move to get back up, as Cortez aims the cane... *THWACK!* ...and strikes Maddix in the ribs! With a wail of pain Maddix drops to his knees, holding the body area in question. This time, Cortez doesn't make the mistake of stepping into lowblow range...staying behind Maddix... *THWACK!* ...and lashing him over the top of the head with the cane! "Maddix is taking a beating here!" Comet exclaims. "I tell ya Comet...Manson, Andrea, Drazon and King...they've all got to be watching this with huge-ass grins on their faces right now. One of them is going to get a shot at Maddix's belt and whoever that is, they'll likely have a weakened ICTV Champion on their hands." Flopping to the mat, it seems Maddix is no longer on his last legs and is now nearing his last breath. Still Cortez is weilding the cane, possibly seeing The Masked Man or Mike Van Siclen laying at his feet as his frustrations are really coming out. "HEY!" Comet suddenly yells... ...as at ringside Chris Card has grabbed a pitcher of water, carefully rolling into the ring with it. "You think that's his way of saying drink Pepsi Max?" Riley chuckles. Seeing Card weilding a potentially lethal weapon, Cortez understandably backs off from Card. But instead of going after Cortez, Card leans down beside Maddix...and tips the ice cold water over his head! The water does it's job, reviving Landon. But it doesn't miraculously cure Maddix's bad ribs, so all it really does is leave Maddix hurt and wet. *THWACK!* "YEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!" The crowd break out into cheers, as suddenly, Cortez strides over and nails Card with the cane sending him flying out of the ring, pitcher in hand. He hits the floor, as does the pitcher which smashes in front of a despairing Comet. Meanwhile in the ring Cortez drops the cane, stands over Maddix and grabs a handful of Landon's soaking wet hair, pulling him slowly to his feet... ...but the slippery hair proves costly, as Cortez looses his grip, allowing Maddix to find a burst of energy and take Cortez over with a Salto Suplex! "Counter by Maddix!" Riley yelps, leaping out of his seat. "He's ALIVE~!" "He's very much alive!" Comet exclaims. "You don't count Landon Maddix out. We saw that time and time again at Ground Zero, and we're seeing it tonight!" Having landed hard across his neck, Cortez is now looking in bad shape. But Landon is little much better, clutching his ribs, lacking the energy to capitalise on his desperation move. Card is yelling encouragement his way now, as Maddix looks around the ring for Cortez with no idea where he is. Finally finding him, Maddix summons up the strength to drop an arm over the Tag Champion... ONE! TWO! KICKOUT! "It took too long for the cover to come." says Comet. "Cortez, therefore, had the time to recover." "Well, I doubt it would have been enough anyway, really. Landon didn't have the energy to get all of that move." As exhaustion is really setting in now, it's Cortez who is winning the fight to his feet...using the ropes to do so. Meanwhile Landon is rolling across the ring aimlessly, unable to find the energy to get back up, despite Card yelling at him to do so. Following the noise, Maddix turns to Card and mouths one simple word... ..."table". "YEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!" The crowd, seeing this on the big-screen, pop for the wood like bubble-wrap in a puppy factory...or, something...what Stevens said the other show. You know. Anyway, they pop. And Card pops too...popping into life as he flips up the ring skirt and wastes little time in pulling a table from underneath the ring. "Heeeeere we go!" Riley says, smiling broadly. "The table is out, but it may not be needed if these men can hit one big move." Cortez is now back to his feet, Maddix to his knees, as Card heaves the table onto the apron with the help of Natasha and slides it into the ring. But Maddix has to contend with Cortez first, who grabs Maddix under the throat with his right arm, in a kind of back to back chinlock. Turning into Maddix, Corez looks to drop for the Cereal Killer, but Landon suddenly spins to face Cortez's back. Hooking his arms quickly around the Tag Champion's waist, it seems Landon is looking for a backdrop of his own... ...but his ribs won't allow it, allowing Cortez to pops his hips and throw Maddix over his back. However, the ICTV Champion lands on his feet, instantly springing off the mat with the agility of a gymnast and Dropsaulting the turning Cortez in the chest! With the 'sault' landing short of Cortez, Maddix has to take a moment before dropping an arm over his opponent... ONE! TWO! SHOULDERUP! Card and Natasha exchange private words, whispering to each other to avoid the detection of a nearby camera, while Maddix glares up at Hardcastle to question the count. "There was, almost, that one big move." observes Comet. "But as we said earlier about Landon, you cannot count out Citizen Cortez." "Definately not. These two guys are part of the very best the SWF has...which why they're holding belts, obviously." "And both are just twenty years old. The future of the SWF is certainly bright and here are two reasons why." "...done putting the company over?" "For now." Both men have reached their feet by now, with Maddix by-passing Cortez and going for the table. Lifting that up with the front facing him, Maddix looks to set it up ready to use...but Cortez dropkicks the out-ward facing side of the table, sending the wood crashing back into Landon's face and sending him flying. The table doesn't land on Landon, luckily for him, but it does land close enough for Cortez to grab. Quickly he moves the table right up next to the ropes and snaps both legs open, fiddling about underneath the table to lock them...as Maddix struggles to his feet. "The table is set, which is bad news for one...or maybe both of these men!" With the table up and ready, Cortez turns back to Maddix... *SLAP!* "WHOOOOO!" ...and takes a stiff knifedge chop. *SLAP!* "WHOOOOO!" ...but retaliates in kind. Maddix stops dead from the chop, allowing Cortez to nail a big forearm before looking over his shoulder at the table. *SLAP!* "WHOOOOO!" ...leaving himself open for a Maddix knifedge! Now it's Cortez who has stopped in his tracks, as Maddix takes a step back... STOMP! "Uh-oh, time to tune up the choir!" STOMP! "It's..." STOMP! Maddix swings with Sweet Disciple Music... ...but Todd catches the foot, spinning Maddix quickly around and locking the waist for a backdrop right in front of the table! The crowd rise to their feet, knowing this would be it for sure if it hits. But Maddix knows it too and reacts, raising his knee into the jaw of Cortez! The shock and force is enough to cause Cortez to release the waistlock and check his jaw is still in place. Meanwhile Maddix scuttles off as quickly as he can, grabbing the singapore cane and swinging back wildly within an instant. *THWACK!* *THWACK!* *THWACK!* Three VILE cane shots connect over the head of Cortez, dropping him to his knees with hands clasped over his head in a vain attempt at protection. But he needn't bother, as Maddix carelessly tosses the cane aside and steps behind Cortez, pulling him to his feet before placing him in position for an Exploder Suplex. "Watch out...Maddix is looking to put Cortez through the table here!" gasps Comet, hardly able to look... Maddix heaves, but fails to lift Cortez! A second attempt fails too, with Maddix grabbing his ribs with his free hand. Quickly Cortez pops Maddix with a back elbow, getting free off the Exploder... *smack!* ...and locking on a goozle! "URBAN ASSAULT!" *smack!* "Oh! TESTICULAR ASSAULT!" Riley's call, odd as it is, is accurate as a boot to the groin blocks the Urban Assault attempt. Cortez doubles over, as Maddix has the same sense of urgency as his opponent and quickly hooks Todd up for a vertical suplex. But again, the lift fails due to his bad ribs, allowing Cortez to counter for a suplex of his own. But instead of falling back, Cortez sends Maddix forward and drops him face-first into the table! "This is a battle of desperation now." says Comet, catching his breath. "Maddix is laid out on that table, in a bad way. Cortez is in a bad way too." "And I think Chris Card hurt his hand when he fell out of the ring earlier." "...Who cares!?!" With Maddix laid out on the table, Cortez quickly drops and reaches to his side to pick up the singapore cane right next to him. No movement from Maddix gives Todd a stationary target, as he raises the cane high in the air... *THWACK!* *THWACK!* *THWACK!* *THWACK!* *THWACK!* ...before ruthlessly lashing Maddix across the chest, ribs, head...wherever he possibly can, weakening up the ICTV Champion. Now Maddix really isn't moving, flat out on the table with neck and ribs all screwed up and without the energy to move. Meanwhile, Cortez tosses the cane aside and steps out to the apron, the opposite side of the ropes from the table. He's still close enough to Maddix to reach over the ropes and nail him with a right hand. "I have no idea what Citizen Cortez is thinking here...but whatever it is, it doesn't look good." "Well, he obviously thinks he needs something big to win Comet." "He may well be right, too." Hitting another right hand, Cortez seems to be happy and takes hold of the top rope, seemingly ready to shoot up onto it... ...but before he gets chance, Natasha desperatly clings onto the ankle of the Urban Legend! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" In frustration Cortez starts to thrust and throw his leg, trying to get free of her grip...and eventually kicks her off, sending Natasha flying to the floor! Card looks shocked, and so too does Cortez to be honest, thinking it was Card he was kicking at and not the female Natasha. But his momentary regrets leave him wide open for a kick to the face from Maddix, who has suddenly found the energy to roll onto his front! "Maddix is desperate here, fighting to save himself from being crushed through the table..." "He needn't be so desperate with Card and Natasha fighting his battles on the floor for him!" Comet snaps. Another kick from Maddix rocks Cortez, almost crashing off the apron and to the floor. He manages to hang onto the top rope though, as Maddix rolls off of the table and over the back of Cortez... ...TO LOCK ON A DRAON CLUTCH! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" "Land Of Nod!" gasps Comet. "Land Of Nod...on the apron!" "Oh...this is bad! These two are hovering right over us here!" With the dragon sleeper locked in and his legs wrapped around the waist of Cortez, Maddix has the Land Of Nod locked perfectly in and it's effects are quickly evident. Cortez slumps forward into the ropes which are the only reason he and Maddix aren't falling to the concrete floor. Meanwhile Chris Card sees the perilous position his man is and positions himself underneath the two men, incase of any falls. But Cortez is determined not to fall, despite the fact Maddix is wrenching back on the head relentlessly. "Maddix is risking life and limp here with this move...if these two men fall, then Maddix is going to get crushed!" But Maddix really couldn't care it seems, as he continues to pull back with the Land Of Nod. Cortez is already looking weary in the hold, the energy being sapped from him and his heels beginning to teeter dangerously over the edge of the apron. "COR - TEZ! COR - TEZ! COR - TEZ!" "Would you listen to this crowd, getting behind Todd Cortez her..." *TAP TAP TAP TAP!* "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" "...BUT IT DOESN'T MATTER!" *DING DING DING!* Cortez taps out, unable to take the energy sapping pain any longer...and Maddix instantly releases the hold, falling from Cortez and into the waiting arms of Chris Card. Card greets him with a celebratory hug, as does Natasha who has recovered from her fall, passing the ICTV Championship belt to Maddix who thrusts it high into the air. "Ladies and gentlemen, here is your winner of the match by submission... LANDON "LA CUCARACHA" ...MAAAAADDIIIIIIIXXXXXX!!!" "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" Finally dropping the belt over his shoulder, the grinning Maddix nods towards the entrance...and with Card's support, begins to walk gingerly up the ramp. Meanwhile Cortez is now laid on the apron, physically spent but with enough energy to angrily pound the mat with his right hand. "What a start to the night here on Storm...and it's Landon Maddix who picks up the impressive win." Comet concedes. "A great effort from Cortez, but in the position he was in you cannot blame him for tapping out." "Definately not. And that's another victim of the Land Of Nod Comet...two in a week, Lezaire and Cortez. Who says Landon Maddix isn't capable of submission wrestling?" "Well, lets not go nuts." "Oh, lets! Landon Maddix, the ICTV Champion...the Tap-Out KING!" "..." Maddix, Card and Natasha continue to celebrate up the ramp, looking very much the happy cohesive unit as Storm cuts away from the arena...

When everyone's finished ranting, any detailed thoughts on my stuff would be appreciated as it's a pretty big storyline and I wanna know how it came off. Cheers.

Well, if Johnny hasn't stolen it already, I take opening promo to clear up the Card/Landon/King/Toxxic madness once and for all.

Rodez is angered, and will talk about stuff.

I always loved Sandman winning the title off of Douglas. They shot a lot vignettes with a big percentage or the roster, saying that Sandman didn't deserve the title because he wasn't a 'wrestler'. Everyone from Raven to the Pitbulls to Mikey had a short promo discussing it. Suddenly, you opened up about 10 or 12 possible World Title matches straight away. It put Sandman over as the wanted man. Then it went to Cactus/Sandman/Douglas with a brief feud, where Cactus got the first title shot over his 'friend' Douglas.

For some reason, I don't see Taker in the Chamber. Not sure why, but I'd go with JotW's Chamber line-up, but sub Big Show in for Taker to even up the face/heel numbers. Plus you really need a big guy in the chamber to do the big power spots (Kane, Goldberg).

I'll probably give Beefcake a run out if I decide to get this, if only to satisfy the mark in me and see the Beefcake strut in video-game form.

Ugh. They should NOT waste an Elimination Chamber on, say, Cena vs. Booker vs. Reigns vs. Haas vs. Van Dam vs. Suzuki. No way in hell. Totally. But the odds of them doing it out-weigh the odds of building challengers for the WWE Title right now. Personally, I'd rather see WarGames at SS. Eugene/Regal/Jericho/Benoit/Orton vs Evolution (HHH/Flair/Batista/Edge/Christian). But that's unlikely, unfortunately.

Got my exams results back and I failed 2 out of the 3 courses I was doing. So forgive me if my match becomes a bit too cheery. Then again, beach volleyball is on... *ceases giving a shit*

Hogan. Yoko. Take your pick from KOTR '93 or WM IX. Taker/JBL is certainly nowhere near worst "WWE Title Match Ever" stature. The terrible crowd made that, and the rest of Summerslam, look worse than it really was.

Wasn't Booker's Spinebuster actually called the Sidewalk Slam? I noticed that but I seem to remember Schiavone calling it that all the time, so figured it was given a seperate name because it was different to the Anderson Spinebuster.

If Jericho wears the same clothes out of the ring that he tends to in the ring, maybe the dress code isn't so bad. In all seriousness though, if this is causing so many problems with workers then maybe Vince should alter the policy. If they'd introduced it as a 'suggested/preffered dress code' rather than a 'compulsory dress code', it might have had more success. As for Bret...I can't be the only one who couldn't care less about any return, surely?

Elimination Chamber for the US Title at Survivor Series? Considering there's about 10 guys going for that title and three after the WWE Title, I could see that.

Considering the heavy-handed nature of Kido's response I don't really blame you for over-reacting. Which you did. To be honest though, if you hadn't have made this post... Then of course, nikjohns was LIGHTNING quick to ban you. Odd, considering that Full House guy was around for at least an hour too long. Then again, he never dares to mention nikjohns name in a bad light, so what can you do? (Apologies if that sounded bitter, but it seems like anyone who puts the slightest foot wrong concerning him is heading for a ban nowadays and it's getting to the point where nikjohns is over-reacting.)

You know, if Eddie still hasn't learnt his lesson and is still verbally attacking fans then why shouldn't this be a thread on it's own. It's an upper-midcarder insulting and verbally attacking the fanbase. Why shouldn't it be a thread on it's own and why should the guy get banned for making the thread and over-reacting to Kido's heavy handed reaction? Hate to bring up this arguement, but if this were Bradshaw, we'd be up to page 4 by now already.

Anyone watching England/Ukraine? One up at half-time and Becks gets the goal. No doubt the entire team will get subbed off at half-time and hopefully we'll see De-Foe and Wright-Phillips on. Oh, and Dyer, so he can get booed off the pitch.

Wow, GB are actually winning medals? *head explodes* Funny that two bronzes and a silver came off of disputed decisions though. Silver in the horsey stuff after Germany fouled the start, bronze in Kayak after a late call on a gate and a bronze in the Archery, partly due to the opponent in the semis shooting before her turn and then timing out on a shot because her coach was yelling at officials.

Johnny/Dace for me too...just ahead of the sixman.