King Cucaracha

Billy Gunn doesn't get cheered in his hometown, sure. But then again, Billy Gunn doesn't fly the flag of his hometown, so go figure. Who's next coolest when the NYC crowd cheer Eugene then?

Lawler. The puppies crap needs to go. Now.

I share Dames' major dislike of spiders. Also bees and wasps. At least flies are easy to hit.

From the Raw preview... So, it's Shelton/Randy tonight? Expect a screwy finish for that one.

MAIN EVENT TAG TEAM MATCH Janus/Landon Maddix vs. Danny Williams/Alan Clark Bleh. BEST-OF-FIVE SERIES UWF-i POINTS SYSTEM MATCH Dace Night (2) vs. Tom Flesher (1) The series ending 3-1? Too much of an anti-climax. Flesher wins. ENDLESS FOUR CORNERS MATCH The Masked Man vs. Ryan Dustin vs. Tryst vs. Jimmy Liston What can I say, expect MARKOUT~! RETURN SINGLES MATCH Munich vs. David Blazenwing Returnee victory. TRIPLE THREAT FOR THE #1 CONTENDERSHIP TO THE ICTV TITLE Ace Lezaire vs. Mike Van Siclen vs. Johnny Dangerous Very tough...Mike to steal it, just. SINGLES MATCH John Duran vs. Todd Cortez I'll go with the upset. HARDCORE MATCH Toxxic vs. Insane Luchadore He doesn't get on my markout list till he changes his music to 'Toxic' by Britney Spears...but he still wins here. SINGLES MATCH Jacob Helmsley vs. Austin Sly He's pretty fly for a Sly guy.

Benoit doesn't have implants. Duh.

Hmm...seems I should get tickets next-time. Not sure why, but I thought it was the Smackdown crew touring and decided to pass.

HHH/HBK should go on either last or midcard. If they put it right before Benoit/Kane, it'll KILL the crowd-heat. Throw HHH/HBK in midcard region like HHH/Austin at NWO 2001, and then follow it up with either Vicky/Gail or maybe a La Res match. Give the crowd time to re-group before Benoit/Kane. 'Cause you know Hunter and Shawn are going to go all out for this one.

Colour me pleasantly surprised. Basic comments coming up...I'll let Dace handle the real comments. Or Taamo. Opener sees Blazenwing die at the hands of Ebony. That in it's self is ratings gold. Remind me never to be in a double no-show again. And there's an explosion, and apparantely I'm dead. Right. Should make these predictions a little tough, but, whatever. "Prepare For Landon" says I! Doesn't look too bad, and my tags actually show up, so w00t~! I'll let ya'll have your opinions on that... Jessica getting water for her man. Damn right bitch~! And IL sneaks up behind. I smell trouble. IL introduces himself, and the sexual tension would make Tom Flesher blush. Oop...but here's Crow. Crow gets over-protective, and Jess starts to verbally fight-back...and promptly leaves. And Ace Lezaire and 'Steve' have filmed it all for some reason. Multiple storyline promos make me smile, and that was a particularly sweet one. Very interesting. Ace vs Duran. Nice little opening, establishing which heel Riley is routing for. “…We can edit out the ‘sucks’ part later, right?” Anyway...Duran dominates to kick it off, being the former World Champ an' all. And it's a speed versus power match it seems. Mistake by Duran, and heelishness gets a two. The HEADLOCK OF DOOM~1 makes a return momentarily, before Ace uses the speed to take the advantage. 'Till Duran slams the crap out of him that is. Nice sunset flip to half crab to Sickle Hold transition, but not enough to beat Duran. Notorious Tactics, and a chokeslam for two. Blunt Force Trauma...nada, as Ace goes behind...KICKWHAMSTUNNER! And Ace wins with a very solid heel vs heel match. The power/speed aspect was played well, and the ending involved the knee. Match of the night so far. "I will return. Deal With It." Consider me marking out for the return of Card. Danny brings the promoage. Short and sweet, as Danny vows to defend the title better this time. Tryout match? Oh boy...SEXUAL MASK O SAURUS~! Marks out for the briefcase. And here comes JT Playa. "the SJL’s finest superstar to never become a superstar". What about TokyoX? He rocked! Sexual Maskosaurus is the greatest nickname ever, as we get the comedy mixed in with the wrestling. Nice way to show nobody gives a crap about Playa. There’s a fine line between being a fan and being an obsessive, frightening stalker.” “Bobbo, it’s Tom Flesher!” “WHERE?” Very nice. Actually quite a decent match underneath the humourous comments, as you'd expect from 'Grappler'. Coutionary Tale of Sexual Maskosaurus becomes the greatest finisher name EVER and gets an anticlimactic three count for the win. “THAT’LL PUT MARZIPAN IN YOUR PIE PLATE, BINGO!” Oooook... Very funny match, and enough actual action to introduce TMM. I'm stoked. Time for Tag action. Crazy partners who hate each other~ are Sly and IL. Crow and Dustin come out together. Regular team maybe? The Tag Division says 'yes please'. IL and Crow hate each other, so Crow tries to chop IL's head off in the corner. Crow dominates IL, before tagging Dustin. And poor Luchador is getting destroyed. Oh well. Cheating helps IL, and here comes Sly. Dustin takes the abuse now. Brass knucks...the old heel faithful. And there's the hot tag. The match is really picking up...but here comes Jessica. Could we see a SWERVE~! Maybe not. Austin wants the hardcore pussy...BUT IL SAVES JESSICA! Oh boy, it be storyline time suckas! Jessica hugs IL, so Crow knocks him out. Seems fair. IL gets a double kick, as Sly walks out on his partner. And some pseudo double-teaming gives Crowdust the win. They really need to become a legit team. Very nice tag match, with a much interesting storyline thrown in. And that was Part 1. Part 2 to come when I get the time...

Well, you're about a month too late on that one.

To Shane Douglas in the fourway when he won the TV Title "Where's your skateboard..."

They might as well bring back the IYH prefix for these shows, because this is seriously resembling an early 96 IYH card. I mean, come on. Beach Volleyball? Well...ok. Hopefully just a throwaway like the APA Barroom Brawl at Vengeance.

Paul London's problem is that he looks like 12 year old boy. When he signed he should've considered two things: a. sign with the wwe and put on muscle mass and give up some of his less exciting moves b. spurn the wwe and realistically see that if he didn't make some drastic changes he wouldn't succeed Personally I think he made the wrong decision. He shouldn't have been surprised how things have gone, and either should have anyone here. Well, I agree with all that and was never for him joining. Same with Dragon. At least AJ Styles had the smarts to know he'd be mis-used. London didn't, and he's walked himself into shit. Which is why I'm waiting for him to go back to ROH where he fits in. This kind of release would stop that though, hence the fuckness.

Wait...if they're 'offering' that to Ultimo, would that mean Paul London can expect the same 'offer' if and when he goes. If so, fuck.

Uh, yeah, I was...so...AH HA! And stuff... Well, while I'm here...Janus, am I cool to use you in a promo during the show?

Well... ...then Fire Pro stole it!

Dace stole the stip from Fire Pro! He deserves no credit! Janus...consider it started. Eventually.

Hooray for time... Ok...Janus does a commercial. And a Toxxic match? Storm=make your own matches it seems. TokyoX? Ok, that's creepy. I was joking earlier you know. Tokyo gets more offense than he ever had in his career, but gets destroyed with the Dangerlust. What more is there to say? Well, not much till Kibagami arrives, and we've got a brawl! Here comes Zenon...and he makes Kibs vs Toxxic at the PPV. And it's LAST MAN STANDING! Way to steal my thunder. Just to be a bitch Zenon suspends Kibs till 13th Hour. I must say, the prospect of Toxxic vs Kibs excites me. Do I hear my name? Why, yes...and it's Clark's promo. I dug it, swerve and all. Clark now has that real creepy edge, which is a total change for his Wayward Sons stuff...a nice character trait. Johnny and Cortez bring the return of the No Gravity Match. Nice continuity for the WC/JD/Boulevard stuff. High tempo start and Johnny brings out a Wildchild speciality, before Johnny goes one up. And two right after with an elbow drop. Attempt at number three misses, and it's time for Cortez to take over. Two quick 'falls' bring the score to 2-2...and it's not long after that it becomes 3:2 to Cortez. The heel domination doesn't last long as Dangerous hits a superplex for a fall. Caught me off guard till I re-read the rules. Johnny goes 4:3 up...only for Cortez to bring it to 4 all. Back and forth match, which finally starts to go into 'nearfall' territory. Even though it's strictly not falls. Whatever. EventuallyTodd nakes a mistake, which leads to a Shooting Johnny Press for the win. Johnny did well with the stip, and it was an entertaining match. Tom Flesher wants to start the main event already. Hey, if it moves me up the card, it's all good with me. Flesher tries to be SNEAKY~, but Dace out sneaks the sneakster by watching him on a monitor. Invasion of privacy I say! Elbow smash to the face...and the main event has begun. Flesher goes through a drinks machine, and the blood has begun already. Man, Taamo's getting killed here. And here come the light-tubes. It wouldn't be hardcore Dace without the light-tubes. Much glass breaking follows. I'm not too sure about the carving into Flesher's back...just seems a bit too far. And slightly unrealistic. But hey, I don't watch many deathmatches, so it may be done. Somehow Tom kicks out, but he still has had no offense. Dace hits the Defenstration on the floor...and that's it? That was a co-write, right? I don't really know what to say. Here's my match. And yay, the tags are still on. Quite surprised to win, but there ya go. Janus and Clark...in the main event. Another speed vs power match here, as Janus proves too strong for Clark, until he makes a mistake and crashes into the ring post. Clark works the knee in amongst Janus no selling some chops. You can' stop Janus though, as he hits some more power moves. The legwork vs power moves continues...but Alan Clark is somehow able to hit a northern lights suplex for a nearfall. Janus isn't going to be fazed by that though. GORE! GORE! GORE! Lol at the Janice Sucks chants. The Bloodmist gets a mark-out from me, and back to the leg we go. Wrath Of Clark, but Janus is immune to the nature of tapping. Knuckle Bomb drops Clark, and Janus brutally finishes it off to retain the title. Much like the opener, and entertaining bigman/littleman contest where kneework slows the bigman. Kudos to Janus on a great victory. All in all, a very entertaining show. The double no-show was dissappointing and the rather odd Flesher/Dace 'match' confused me. But besides that, some very respectable matches and promos, solid build for the PPV...and no title changes! And those are my comments. Take it away Dace.

I have shown. Huzzah.

You mean our match and not the card, right?

Man, the ratings are gonna suffer on those time-slots.

Hey we can always have a match on the show after this next one. You should come back because we need more people in the OAOAST right now. Alright, that's cool by me. Consider me back.

Pretty certain she hasn't.

Ouch. I just had the HARDEST exam EVER today. Mechanics. No kidding, I didn't understand ONE question, and I wouldn't be surprised to not get a single mark. That said, no matter how sucky an ending I come up with this side of the last ever Friends finally getting shown over here, I will show. Flik...real sorry to hear about your Grandfather. Hope everything turns out ok for ya.

They've both improved leap and bounds, and have done enough to win over a lot of people which deserves big credit. On 'basics' though, I think Orton has got the basics of his dick heel persona down slightly better than Batista has the basics of the monster heel persona down.