janusd

Eh, me and Craven lost. *falls asleep at his desk* TAFE = teh suck.

*is shot* *dies* *comes back as Dead Man Janus* *jobs Spike in under a minute to a Tombstone*

Tod, we want part three. You rock. I loved it. Particularly the bits I just quoted. MORE!

My Desktop 0wnages You Hosted with much love by Crow. And greater than his just because I said it is.

I have nothing to say. Except you rock. \m/ >_< \m/ Oh, and (Y) for the first appearance of Jessica. Mua'hahahaaa.

Opening Promo - WildChild -- M7, when they come out mid-promo to squash him. Tag Team Match Beezel & Mike Van Siclen v. Michael Craven & Janus -- Me and Craven to edge out the victory, sez I. He WILL write, unlike former partners. Singles Match "The Barracuda" Johnny Dangerous v. "The Judge" William Hearford -- M7 pridez0rs. Justice William Hearford to make Johnny squeal. Handicap Match Deja Vu v. Neilsen of the Jungle -- Deja Vu rock. But Neilsen rocks harder than them. And he pissed off King. Neilsen to win. Main Event Six Man Tornado Tag Team Match "Deathwish" Danny Williams, Frost & "TNT" Taylor Nicholas Thompson v. "The Superior One" Tom Flesher, Ejiro Fasaki and J Dawg -- No fucking idea.

Holy crap. I just noticed.... THE PPV IS AFTER THIS SMARKDOWN. \m/ >_< \m/

*runs in and waffles WC with a ladder, then Dark Bombs him on said ladder to put him out of the SWF again*

...... Me and Craven? ....... AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! That said, he better be RELIABLE, dammit.

Yes, yes I did. It scared people.

*runs away and cries as he has not a chance in hell of winning a multi-man match like this*

Thugg - the site's up.

I jinxed myself with that 'may the best man win comment'. My loss record is exceeding my win record. Must...win...matches! That said, congrats Beezel. And congrats to Flesher too for winning - though I still wonder what the TFDB is, dammit!

Looks like a good show. I just skimmed the winners, given it's 1:25am or so down here in Australia. I feel a bit downfallen that I lost to Frost, but he's been around longer than me, and I guess my match had some flaws. And he's a damn good writer, naturally. On that note - Frost - do notify me when you write a promo that involves me, just to give me a heads up. Other than that...good show. Sleep now. Will post my losing match later.

Niiiiice~! Luck to you, Beezel. As the saying goes, may the best man win, eh?

...... *finds his title renamed the DDR Title* ....... *freestyles*

One on one hardcore. Should be easier to write than the three-way match where I won the title. *eats lunch* Right. Time to get writing.

Looks like I have to start using Microsoft Word to count my matches now instead of Word Counter (which I've been using for quite a while now) Word Counter gave me a 5942 or so, so I'm UNDER the limit. I look in Word, I'm OVER the limit by 100. And like Frost said above - it does feel like I was cheated unless Mark thought Frost did the better match anyway. Meh. I sleep now. I'm not griping. Just pointing out WHY I'm irritated at the word-count-loss.

..... (N) @ losing by WORD-LIMIT-DQ That is all. *sigh*

I'm no selling sleep. God-DAMN. Edit: Lost...by....being....100....words.....over.... ARGH! When I checked it it clocked in at 5941....losing like this...ARGH! ------- The roar of the fans is the first thing to be heard as SWF Smarkdown comes on the air, the cameras panning around the crowd to catch signs such as "Justice and Rule 0wnz0r j00!" - obviously written by an internet fan - and a whole row of fans holding up individual letters that spell out "M-7 FEARS FROST". As the cameras pan about the arena, more signs such as "TNT Set Flesher Up The Bomb!" and "Janus the Anus!" are brought into view. As it spins around once more before heading for ringside, the camera locks onto the ring, where a fifteen-foot steel cage stands, complete with heavy cargo netting on the top, and then we are treated to the faces of 'Grand Slam' and his announcing partner! "Welcome back to SWF Smarrrrrrrkdown, ladies and gentlemen! I'm here with Bobby Riley, and after seeing Tom Flesher and Jay Dawg go at it..." Stevens is interrupted by his partner... "And Tom showed that no matter the outcome of the match, he's still Superior!" "We'll see about that, Riley...right, up next, we have the ex-Magnificent Seven Frost taking on who to all intentions looks to be his replacement, the Hardcore Gamer's Champion Janus!" Stevens pauses, to allow Riley to get some Magnificent Seven asskissing in, and the amibigiously gay announcer doesn't disappoint. "Janus is bigger than Frost, stronger than Frost, and tougher than Frost! He's got sheer power on his side, and there's no way he can lose! Hell, he's even OLDER than Frost!" Riley makes sure to put Janus over like nothing else, much to Stevens' disgust. Before the baseball-loving 'ex-Carnie' announcer can make a riposte, however, Black Sabbath's "Snowblind" blares out of the speakers - causing a MASSIVE cheer from the fans - as silverish pyro blasts from the rafters, making it appear as if snow is falling onto the entryway. Bathed in a pale blue spotlight, Frost steps out onto the stage and lifts his fist in the air, acknowledging the fans which just makes them cheer louder! Taking a puff of his Frost Brand Cigar, the Iceman from Iceland begins a methodical walk down the ramp as Funyon lifts up his microphone. "The following contest is a No Escape Steel Cage match, where victory can only be won by pinfall or submission! Introducing first, weighing two hundred and ninety six pounds, and hailing from Reykjavik, Iceland! He is the Velvet Hammer....FRRRRRRRROST!" The crowd continues to cheer as Frost reaches the bottom of the ramp, standing before the cage and looking at it grimly before dropping his cigar and grinding it beneath his boot. Heading around the side, he motions for referee Mark Hebner to open the cage door. Stepping into the cage, Frost looks around, inspecting the structure, as one by one, the lights turn off in the arena, plunging everything into pitch blackness. The crowd's cheering instantly turns to thunderous boos as the Smarktron shows an image of a young man, with his hair recently dyed white. As the strains of Fear Factory's "Resurrection" echo through the arena, cracks slowly begin to weave through the image, and blue pyros start fountaining up on either side of the ramp. Before Funyon can speak, the voice of Burton C. Bell carries through the arena. "Consumed with memories... That preceded today... Given a chance to bereave.. Life that's slipping AWAAAAAAAAAAAY!!" As the heavy riffs roar out of the speakers, the crack-riddled image explodes into fragments, revealing the face of Janus as he is now, with a scowl on his face. His name flashes up in green text, and it proceeds to play clips of some of his more brutal spots - interspersed with flashes of his name and "Magnificent Seven". The monster steps out onto the rampway, his Hardcore Gamer's Title around his waist, and that barbed-wire cricket bat in one hand. "And introducing his opponent, hailing from Sydney Australia and weighing a full three hundred and fifty pounds....he is your SWF Hardcore Gamer's Champion and a member of the Magnificent Seven...the Hell Machine...JAAAAAAAAAAAANUS!" "And he's got that cricket bat with him again! He used that to win the belt!" Stevens indicates the weapon as Janus strides past the blue ramp pyros, that go out as he steps past them. Frost just stands within the cage, watching the seven footer step down the ramp. The Velvet Hammer doesn't even flinch as Janus thrusts his arms into the air, causing blue fire to explode from the turnbuckles inside the cage. Stepping around the cage, Janus places both his belt and weapon at the timekeeper's table, before pivoting on his heel and striding back towards the cage door, stepping up and standing in the entrance, staring at Frost before stepping over the ropes. Mark Hebner steps inside and slams the cage door shut, as the Velvet Hammer and the Hell Machine continue to stare at each other. Hebner decides to stick in an out-of-the-way corner, for the moment. "I don't think Frost has ever faced someone the size of Janus before...he's not even afraid, though!" Stevens watches as Frost proves this by delivering a thunderous punch to Janus' chest! The seven footer stumbles a little, blinking once at the hard impact of the blow, and responds with a powerful blow to the stomach that sends the Velvet Hammer reeling with a small grimace on his face. Lifting his hands into the air, Janus charges, and Frost meets him, both of them locking hands and trying to force the other to the ground in a hoss-tastic test of strength! Both superstars grit their teeth, pushing at each other, and it's Frost that begins to slip, as the seven footer applies pressure. The Icelander fights back however, reasserting his grip.... but Janus puts a stop to that with a firm knee into the stomach, and he grabs the slightly stunned Frost and whips him towards the ropes... ...and when he comes back, Janus grunts and pulls him up into position for a sitout powerbomb! Lifting his hand, Frost drives a stiff punch straight into Janus' forehead, forcing the giant to drop his slightly smaller opponent...and Frost capitalises by reaching around one side of Janus' body, locking in a waistlock...and with a grunt and a slight strain of muscles...he lifts the Hardcore Gamer's Champion off the ground and slams him over with a gutwrench suplex! "Tremendous power by Frost! He just suplexed Janus! That's no easy feat!" Stevens yells. "Bah! Janus will just show him what a real suplex is." Riley snorts, being as condescending as possible about Frost as the Velvet Hammer rises to his feet and looks down at Janus, before trying to stomp a hole in the seven footer's ribcage with hard and heavy stomps! Janus grunts and rolls away under the assault, trying to climb back to his feet...and Frost meets him with a stiff jab to the ribs! The giant seeks to straighten up, and as he does, Frost readies himself for another punch to soften the monster... ....but finds himself lifted into the air and dropped across Janus' knee with an inverted atomic drop! Grimacing in pain, Frost steps away a little...and Janus follows up with a standing lariat that makes the Velvet Hammer reel only a little bit. Blinking once at the effect his attack had, Janus steps back to the ropes and builds up a little speed behind the lariat...only to find Frost slipping out of the way and cinching in a half-nelson. Swinging his free elbow back into the Icelander's ribcage, Janus forces Frost to release the hold...and the giant twists around and locks in a full nelson of his own...and with seemingly minimal effort, throws himself back and releases Frost, throwing him through the ropes... ...and smashing him into the side of the cage with a released full-nelson suplex! The crowd winces at that move, and Riley cheers with glee as Frost is left in a heap in the small space between the ropes and the ring. The Velvet Hammer shakes his head, grimacing, trying to get the ringing pain out as he rises to his feet. "And here comes Janus to punish Frost some more!" Riley chortles as Janus sights the rising Icelander, and charges along with a boot raised high - and gritting his teeth in pain as he kicks nothing but cage as Frost ducks! "No success there, it seems." Stevens smiles almost smugly. Riley just humphs and watches the ring as Janus lowers his leg to look down at Frost, reaching down to drag him through the ropes. The Iceman from Iceland doesn't take too well to this though, grabbing the arm that holds his, and throwing Janus into the turnbuckle with a stiff irish whip! Hitting chest-first, Janus bounces off the pads and Frost hooks his head, driving the Hell Machine into the canvas with an inverted DDT before hooking a leg! ONE! TW... ....and Janus thrusts an arm into the air! "Early pin attempt by Frost! Janus doesn't stay down though!" Stevens calls. "A near two count off an inverted DDT? I mean, come on!" Riley whines at that fact as Frost helps himself to a handful of Janus' hair and drags the Hell Machine back to his feet. Frost pauses a moment before lifting the seven footer into the air with a little bit of trouble....and dropping him facefirst back into the turnbuckles with a snake-eyes. Keeping his momentum going, he cinches his arms around Janus' waist and pops his hips, throwing the Hardcore Gamer's Champion over his head with a stunning german suplex! Janus crashes into the canvas right on his head, grimacing in obvious pain, but still starting to get back to his feet. Frost lets the giant think it's safe, and then charges forward when the seven footer is on his knees, hooking the giant's head.... ....and finding a pair of thick arms wrapping around his waist and lifting him off the ground! Letting go of Janus' head, the Velvet Hammer lifts his fist again...but this time Janus roars and slams Frost down at full power with his patented high-angle spinebuster! The ring shakes at the loud boom it makes, and Janus kicks Frost over onto his stomach and plants a foot in the center of his back. "Frost looking for...something...but Janus counters straight into a high angle spinebuster! And now he's got Frost on the ground!" Stevens calls. "That's right, Janus! Grind that heel!" Riley's comment comes from the fact Janus is indeed grinding his boot into Frost's spine, before leaning down to hook the Icelander's arms and pull them back for a standing surfboard submission! Mark Hebner comes out of his safe corner to ask if Frost wants to give up - but the Iceman from Iceland refuses to stay down, gritting his teeth and pulling HARD with his restrained arms, yanking Janus offbalance. The Hell Machine stumbles off Frost's back, ....and Frost climbs to his feet with surprising quickness - and ignoring the pain in his back - hooking a half-nelson on the giant and throwing himself forward, planting Janus skull first into the canvas with a bulldog! Janus rolls onto his back, and an attempt to drag the seven footer off the canvas is countered with a very stiff and well aimed kick by Janus! "Oh, come on! Janus just kicked Frost between the legs!" Stevens frowns. "Heehee! The only way to win is by submission or pinfall - there IS no disqualification!" Riley giggles with glee as Frost drops to his knees, grimacing and holding his violated crotch. Bouncing himself off the ropes, Janus lifts a leg and smashes Frost down into the canvas with a big boot, then drops to cover him! ONE! TWO! Frost kicks out of the pinfall, holding his head. Janus hadn't hit him much, but by god did he hit HARD, was the Velvet Hammer's thought as Janus climbed off him and rose once more to his feet. The giant leans in the turnbuckles as his slightly smaller opponent found his feet again, and then roared out of the corner with shoulder lowered for a Gore! But Frost, although slightly brain-scrambled, sees the move coming and grabs the incoming Hell Machine...hoisting him up...twisting...and planting him with a huge tilt-a-whirl slam, hooking the monster's leg! ONE! TWO! TH... ....Janus breaks out of the pin by thrusting his arms off the canvas - and grabbing Frost by the head! Clamping his hands around the Icelander's skull, Janus squeezes, and Frost makes an inarticulate sound of pain, one huge Icelandic hand swinging down to slam into Janus' face - and the giant loses his grip as pain shoots through his jaw. Both Frost and Janus kneel and sprawl (respectively) in order to gather their wits, before almost simultaneously rising to their feet. Utter silence followed. *SMACK* "WHOOOOOOO!" Frost drives a huge and stiff chop right into Janus' chest! The Hell Machine doesn't disappoint by firing back with his own! *SMACK* "WHOOOOOOO!" Again Frost chops Janus in the chest, and again Janus returns the favour! Expecting another chop from Frost, the giant is sent reeling by a thunderous punch straight into the left side of his chest! "TOUCH OF FROST! JANUS MAY SUFFER AN EARLY WINTER!" Stevens yells in surprise. "No, Janus! Nooooooo!" Riley tries to will the giant into action as Janus reels from the Touch of Frost, and the Velvet Hammer moves in...Janus grits his teeth and bunches his right hand, muscles tensing.... ...and to Frost it feels as if an explosion has blasted into his ribcage as Janus strikes home with a sheer-power punch of his own! "KNUCKLE BOMB! JANUS JUST BLASTED FROST WITH THE KNUCKLE BOMB!" Riley almost orgasms in his seat as Stevens stares at the scene in the ring....Frost physically staggering from the sheer impact of the blow to his chest, allowing Janus some serious recovery time... ...enough to grab the Icelander by the back of the head! With a firm grip on his opponent's head, Janus storms towards the ropes with some mysterious intent - then skids to a halt and thrusts Frost's head over the ropes, slamming it into the cage! The crowd 'ooo's in sympathy at the yell of pain from the Velvet Hammer, as Janus growls almost like a beast...and pounds Frost's head into the cage wall over and over! By the third slam, blood is visible on Frost's forehead. By the sixth slam the blood is definitely obvious - it's running down Frost's face - as Janus stops and lets Frost hang onto the ropes for a moment before booting him to the ground and sprawling across him in a pinfall! ONE! TWO! THRE... Frost kicks out, and Janus looks rather displeased. Leaving the Icelander on the mat to bleed, the giant rises to his feet. Turning his ominous gaze to Mark Hebner and points at the cage door. The referee shakes his head, and Janus steps towarsd him threateningly - and Hebner complies, opening the cage door! Janus steps through the door and drops to the ground. "What's Janus doing?? He can't win by leaving the cage..." Stevens ponders. "Hey, he's coming this way! I wonder what he's...woohoo!" "Oh no..." Riley's cheer and Stevens' dismay are not without reason, as Janus stops by the announce table, and picks up the barbed-wire cricket bat. He regards it and then the crowd with a smile before he starts heading for the cage once more. The crowd breaks out in a chant of "JANUS SUCKS!" when they see him with it, and Hebner tries to prevent the monster from entering with the weapon... ...and Janus shoves him aside and steps over the top rope, moving to stand behind Frost and lifting the bat with a grim smile on his face. The Velvet Hammer senses motion behind him and turns around, providing a perfect target for Janus to brutalise... ...except the bloody-faced Icelander ducks, and sinks a left cross right into Janus' abdomen, winding the giant and making him drop his weapon! Reaching out, Frost grabs Janus by the shoulder and leg...and very slowly, after a pause, shifts his position and lifts the monsterous Hell Machine above his head with a gorilla press! "Look at Frost! He's an inch or three smaller and not quite as strong, but he's pressing Janus, the three hundred and fifty pounder, above his head!" Stevens is in awe. "Break your arms, Frosty! You can't lift that much!" Riley is, as always, insulting. Grimacing, blood running into his eyes, Frost pumps his arms once before throwing Janus to the ground with a thunderous boom! The Velvet Hammer's eyes fall upon the weapon Janus dropped...and he picks it up, looking down at the giant as he shakes his head to clear it and pushes himself up to hands and knees. Lifting the barbed-wire cricket bat, Frost slams it down into Janus' spine, causing him to make an inarticulate snarl of pain and collapse. "Looks like payback gonna be a bitch, Janus!" "Whoa, you swore, Stevens!" Riley stares in surprise. "Uh...oops?" The banter between Stevens and Riley trails off as Frost decides an 'eye for an eye' is a good thing, and rolls Janus over onto his back with a boot to the gut. The giant looks up at the top of the cage from his new vantage point, then yells in pain as Frost hits him in the face with the barbed wire, and grinds it against his skin before throwing it away! The Icelander brings his bloodied face down to Janus' equally crimson one, and whispers with a low rumble... "You've got a one way ticket on the job train, Janus..." ....before dragging the giant up to his knees and hooking his arms in preparation for the Early Winter! Janus shows he's not the Hardcore Gamer's Champion for nothing however, and straightens up right out of the head-scissors, flipping Frost over his head with a standing backbody drop. "Why the heck does he keep trying for the Early Winter so much? Is he daft that he can't get it on someone of Janus' size?" Riley adds a bit more fuel to the anti-Frost argument, and Stevens is only too glad to reply. "Frost is stronger than you think, Riley. Though he must be trying to put Janus away to show the Magnificent Seven he's a threat....AND before the giant wears him out too much...." As the commentators banter, Frost begins to recover from the backbody drop just in time for Janus to throw himself into the air...and compress the Icelander's chest with a huge standing legdrop! Frost gasps as the air is driven from his chest by the sheer impact, and he rolls away and slowly begins to return to his feet, keeping an eye on the seven foot Hell Machine...who swings his arm around and locks a huge hand around the throat of the Velvet Hammer, ready to chokeslam him! Frost's eyes widen only momentarily, and.... *SMACK* ....he swings his other arm around and locks it around Janus' throat! The two monsterous men stare at each other, with their firm grips...and Janus attempts to power out and lift Frost off the canvas! The Icelander will have none of it, resisting with all his might, squeezing at Janus' throat and attempting to hoist him off the mat! Neither man seems to be able to get the advantage, and after a moment, Frost releases his grip on Janus' throat, and grabs the Hell Machine's arm with one hand, and wraps his other arm around Janus' side, and with a supreme test of strength, the frosty one actually lifts Janus off his feet, breaking the chokeslam attempt much to the seven footer's surprise, and he finds himself on Frost's shoulders. "What the...both men going for chokeslam attempts, but Frost stops his and actually lifts Janus off his feet to stop the attempt!" Stevens is surprised at the 'unique' way Frost broke the hold, and Riley responds. "And now he's got Janus on his back...and that much weight should destroy Frosty's shoulders! He shouldn't be able to lift that much weight!" Despite the ambigiously gay announcer's demand that Frost's body break apart, the Iceman from Iceland holds Janus on his shoulders and begins to spin himself around! On his shoulders, Janus shifts his great weight...and the spin comes to a stop as the giant thuds off Frost's shoulders and back to his feet! Rather than make an attack, both of the men just stare at each other again - Frost bloodied from being grated against the cage, and Janus bloodied from being hit with that barbed-wire cricket bat. "And we have a good old fashioned staredown, Riley!" Stevens calls, watching the men in the cage stare at each other. "Pfft! Old fashioned? Frost is old and busted. Janus is the new hotness here!" "Are you implying Janus is hot in a physical way or a gay way, Riley?" Grand Slam couldn't help but take a jab at his co-announcer's ambiguity. "....Physical, of course..." "Riiiiiiiight...." Riley catches the oozing disbelief from Stevens' voice. "HEY!" As the attention goes back to the ring, both Janus and Frost continue to stare, then the Hell Machine takes the advantage by slamming a stiff knee into the Velvet Hammer's ribcage! Hooking him around the head, Janus roars to the crowd, who respond with boos as he hoists Frost up in a massive vertical suplex. Well aware of his position, Frost kicks his legs in the air, wriggling a little...and it puts the giant off balance enough for Frost to fall back to the ground, still in a front facelock! Before Janus can hoist him up, Frost cinches in a front facelock of his own, and attempts to hoist the seven footer off his feet. Janus doesn't want that, though, and attempts to use his own facelock to hoist the Velvet Hammer back into position for the Rage Unleashed screwdriver! Despite clearly being the stronger man, the Hell Machine doesn't seem to be able to pull Frost up again, and with a supreme effort, roaring wordlessly.... ....Frost elevates Janus up into the air, in a suplex, holding him there... ...before dropping straight back and to the ground and hitting a brainbuster suplex! The crowd cheers for the high-impact move, and Janus crumples to the mat, holding his head. Sitting up after delivering the blow and shaking his head, Frost rolls over and hooks one of the monster's legs. ONE! TWO! THR..... The kickout isn't as strong as one would have expected, but still, Janus kicks out, still holding his head. "Janus went for the Rage Unleashed to finish this match, but Frost countered and hit a PAINFUL looking brainbuster suplex on Janus!" Stevens calls, sounding elated that Frost is bringing the punishment to Janus. "Pfffft! Just let Janus recover and he'll whip Frost's pussy ass all over that cage!" Riley is as always supportive of big sexy men, as Janus slowly begins to sit up. The seven foot monster doesn't seem to quite know where he is, but he sure as heck knows where Frost is...as the Icelander grabs the rising giant by the hair, and pulls him up into a fireman's carry. However, like the seven footer that is his opponent, Frost is beginning to look battered and winded from this match. After a pause, he throws Janus' legs off his shoulders and spins him out to the side....and drops to one knee, and the crowd winces at the obvious physical pain of Janus' face and jaw smashing into the raised knee of the Velvet Hammer. Clutching his face, Janus attempts to roll away and get back to his feet, but he's assisted by Frost as the Icelandic one grabs Janus by the hair and begins to lift him off the ground... ...at least until Janus' arm slams into the Velvet Genitalia of the Velvet Hammer, causing Frost to release his hair and gasp, holding his violated-for-the-second-time crotch. Rising to his feet, Janus hooks Frost's head and elevates him off the canvas, before falling to the side and crushing Frost's face into the canvas with a stiff and painful looking implant DDT! Rather than go for a pinfall, Janus rolls away from Frost, and pushes himself up to his feet. Wavering, the giant presses his hands to his face and pulls them away, looking at the sanguine hue of his gloves - and his wavering stops as a dark smile crosses his face. "....I don't like that look, Riley...." Stevens blinks slowly. "It's even creeping me out..." Still smiling to himself, Janus scans the ring and picks up the barbed-wire cricket bat. Placing it across Frost's abdomen, the giant steps towards the ropes and ascends the turnbuckles, perching like some monsterous vulture on the top rope, watching the seemingly unmoving body of the Velvet Hammer. Then the giant rises to a standing position as if preparing for a frog splash, and stretches his arms. "Hey, there's no way Janus can jump that far! It's practically half-way across the ring!" Stevens calls, watching the giant. "He must have other plans..." Riley murmurs. And Bobby Riley is right as Janus finishes stretching...before grabbing hold of the cargo netting that covers the roof of the cage! Like a gorilla, the giant begins to swing across the netting - slowly. It shudders and bends under the three hundred and fifty pound Australian's weight, but it remains firm...as Janus swings again, bringing himself over the stirring body of Frost... ...he continues to hang from the netting, looking down at the Icelander below him, with the barbed-wire cricket bat across his chest... ...and the giant swings himself forward and lets go of the netting, tucking his arms and stretching as he falls towards Frost... ...and two loud yells of extreme pain are hard as Janus HITS THE FROG SPLASH ONTO THE BARBED WIRE CRICKET BAT AND FROST! "HOLY SHIT!" "HOLY SHIT!" "HOLY SHIT!" "Holy sweet mother of GOD! WHAT THE HELL!?" Stevens gawks. "He...he just...fell onto Frost...and crushed that barbed-wire...bat...yeah..." Riley is equally stunned as Janus rolls off Frost's body. Both Velvet Hammer and Hell Machine don't move after that, the cricket bat still held togther by the twisted knots of barbed wire...which have cut and mangled the flesh of both Janus and Frost...and both superstars are even bloodier than before, with the sanguine redness now staining their chests. Mark Hebner looks at the carnage with his jaw hanging, before looking around and lifting an arm and beginning a ten count! ONE! TWO! THREE! The slightest twitch of movement comes from Janus' body. Frost convulses once but doesn't show any other sign of life. FOUR! FIVE! SIX! "I don't think either of them are getting up, Riley....I guess Janus decided to punish Frost and they both paid the price." Stevens is unsure of what else to say. "It doesn't look like it....hey.....what in the hell.....NO WAY!" Riley exclaims and points at the ring. The exclamation is well founded as Janus strains his body and begins to oh so slowly sit up. Mark Hebner is so surprised someone's even moving after that that he stops the ten count! The bloody Hell Machine sits up, but doesn't do much more than that, staring at nothing. His eyes are completely dilated as if he's in shock. "Make the cover, Janus! MAKE THE COVER!" Riley shrieks. "I don't think he can hear you...it looks like he's in plain shock or something" Stevens responds, watching the giant just SIT there. Beside the monster, Frost begins to stir, grimacing in pain, one arm slowly coming up to push the wreckage of the barbed-wire bat off his chest, but other than that, neither of them make a move... ...until Janus turns to the side and drapes himself across the fallen Icelander! Seeing that someone finally went for the pinfall, Hebner drops down and counts, watching Frost's shoulders. ONE! TWO! THREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEHOLYFUCKNO!!! Mark Stevens and Bobby Riley stare. Mark Hebner stares. Janus stares. Frost's right arm is thrusting into the air, his shoulder off the canvas. And the crowd explodes into cheers. "FROST OWNS YOU!" "FROST OWNS YOU!" "FROST OWNS YOU!" Rolling off the Velvet Hammer, Janus sits back up, head hanging. Bloody stains his face, chest, and hair, and the incredibly brutal spot he'd just executed had NOT KEPT FROST DOWN. The giant slams a fist into the canvas and gets his legs under him, standing tall and proud - despite staggering and almost falling over again at the pain that echoes through almost every fiber of his being. Frost does not disappoint either, slowly sitting up - and being helped to his feet by the Magnificent Seven monster. After hoisting him up, Janus cinches his arms under Frost's and locks in a full nelson.... ....that stops when the Icelander kicks back with a blow to the crotch that staggers Janus! Turning around, wavering on his feet thanks to the brutal barbed-wired-bat-assisted frog splash, the Velvet Hammer applies an inverted facelock to his opponent, takes a breath.... ...and the giant's world is thrown into disarray as Frost proceeds to Rock n' Roll the Dice, slamming Janus down right on the nape of his neck! The seven footer's body bounces and goes almost limp, but Frost sprawls on the ground as well, the exhaustion of the match beginning to get to him more intently now. As for Janus, it's hard to tell as the giant's eyes are closed. "That splash off the netting changed the pace of the whole match, Riley!" Stevens calls, watching the two men lay on the ground. "I hate to agree Grand Spam but I think you're right! They practically DIED when Janus hit that move!" Riley actually sounds concerned, probably for Janus more than Frost. "Look at them both! The blood is covering Frost's face and chest, and Janus isn't much better off at all!" Mark Hebner looks at both downed superstars and lifts his arms to begin a ten count, but Frost, having taken less of the impact of that last move, begins to stir, pushing himself back up to a sitting position. Hearing the inarticulate groan of Janus still on the ground, the Icelander slowly pushes himself to his feet and turns around just in time to spot Janus, someway, somehow, getting up to his knees. The giant's movements are slowly and extremely unbalanced, and seeing the monster regaining his feet, Frost takes a step back and waits....and as Janus staggers upright, the weary Icelander throws a punch that drives home straight into Janus' bloodied chest! Feeling the Touch of Frost, Janus attempts to evade an Early Winter, putting his concentration and his strength into countering the blow like he did last time. His right arm comes around, aiming for Frost's body...but the Icelander grabs the arm in midair with a grimace, and along with Janus' other arm, he underhooks the giant's limbs and with a grimace and a roar of pain and determination, the Velvet Hammer lifts Janus up off the ground! He staggers back on his feet, the exhaustion getting to him, as the giant threatens to unbalance him.....but.....he lets his legs drop from under him... and CRATERS JANUS WITH THE EARLY WINTER! Leaning forward tiredly, Frost looks up as Mark Hebner counts! ONE! TWO! THREEEE.... "NO! It's NOT a three count!" Stevens exclaims, as Frost falls back on the canvas, gasping to get air into his lungs. Hebner looks at the crumpled Janus, and shakes his head to indicate to Frost it was two! "Hahahaha! Frost was too worn down to hold on long enough! He let go before the three! Buffoon!" Riley giggles as both Janus and Frost are once more laying prone on the apron. Hebner crouches by the Icelandic one, indicating again it was a two count, and Frost nods oh so wearily, grimacing as he tries to push himself back up into a standing position as opposed to sitting. After the beating he's taken - the pain, the bloodiness, the exhaustion - Frost resolves he'll do one thing before he passes out in this cage... ...and that's defeat Janus, as he gets himself a handful of white hair and drags the bloody behemoth up as well. Neither Frost or Janus look like they're capable of standing on their own right now, as the Velvet Hammer and the Hell Machine are almost leaning on each other to stay upright. Frost's eyes are exhausted, and Janus' are slightly glazed, but they move slightly, and the two lock gazes, piercing blue eyes staring into dark, malicious green. The pain. The exhaustion. The blood loss. This was the last chance either of them would have to win this match. Neither could go on much further, and planting his hands on Janus' shoulders, Frost shoves with all his might, sending the seven footer reeling back and off balance. Almost falling over, Frost brings his hand back, aiming to nail the Touch of Frost a second time, to put Janus down for the count.... ....but he finds himself reeling as Janus slams a hefty chop into his chest! A second chop follows! And a third! Stumbling to stay on his feet, Janus advances on the Velvet Hammer, and cinches in a front facelock....and straining like Frost had only moments earlier, hoists him up into a massive, stalling vertical suplex! The Hell Machine staggers back, then stumbles forward, trying to maintain his balance as he pushes Frost into position...exhaustion and pain gripping his arms and legs as he lets go of the vertical suplex and sits down.... ...and FROST FEELS JANUS' RAGE UNLEASHED! The stunning impact has the crowd in awe of what these two giants have put themselves through, and after making Frost eat canvas, the Hell Machine just slumps almost lifelessly over the body of the Velvet Hammer. Mark Hebner hesitates only momentarily before dropping down to make the count. ONE! TWO! Hebner hesitates only a moment, before... THREEEEEEE!!! *DING DING DING* As the strains of Fear Factory's "Resurrection" boom out over the speakers, and the fans boo loudly, Funyon rises from his chair. "The winner of this bout...the SWF Hardcore Gamer's Champion.....the Hell Machine......JAAAAAAAAANUS!!!" Hebner checks on the giant, who's sprawled across Frost's body. The sound of his theme music, and the feeling of the referee trying to lift his arm in victory scores the giant's attention as he lifts his bloody head off the ground, trying to regain his feet. The boos echo throughout the arena as Fugue comes slinking down the ramp, and he slips into the cage to help his seven foot tag team partner to his feet. "There's Fugue, repaying Janus' backup in his match with Frost, by helping his partner out of the ring!" Stevens calls. "Hate or like them, the Magnificent Seven sticks together!" "Janus showed Frost what-for! And it looks like Fugue isn't the only helper! Look!" Riley points as the EMTs come down the Smarkdown ramp, with first aid kits and a stretcher in tow. Janus points at the timekeeper's table, and Fugue exits the ring and the cage to retrieve the monster's title as he finds himself supported by the EMTs. Rather than accept the stretcher, Janus just leans heavily on the EMTs, who don't force him. Several other EMTs pull the stretcher over to the ring and wait...and as the cage is lifted, they slide into the ring to check on Frost and roll him over to the stretcher. Fugue catches up with Janus on the ramp and draps the Hardcore Gamer's Championship belt over his tag partner's shoulder. When they reach the stage, Janus stops in his tracks and pushes the EMTs away from him, staggering on his feet before roaring in victory and thrusting his arms into the air! The EMTs help support the giant as he almost collapses, and we cut back to the announce table as the other EMTs go up the ramp with the battered Frost on the stretcher. "That match was just...incredible, wouldn't you agree Riley?" Stevens looks at his co-host. "Yep! Janus WAS incredible, making Frost look talented like that!" Grand Slam just rolls his eyes and looks back at the camera. "We'll be right back, folks! Next up we have the ever-explosive Taylor Nicholas Thompson taking on El Luchadore Magnifico! The stipulation to the match is that the WINNER gets pick Tom Flesher's first opponent for his title!" As the cameras fade out on Smarkdown for the moment, Bobby Riley's "I hope they pick ME!" comment is audible, and then we fade out to a commercial involving Dace Night and the RYOBI Weedwhacker...

The receptionist sits at her desk, typing away diligently at her computer. She pauses however when a great shadow falls across her desk, and she looks up - and up - into the deep green eyes of the white-haired Janus, who stares down at her. He's got his usual black pants and boots on, as well as a black shirt that seems to have his name on the front. It's hard to see as the ensemble is rounded out by a long White trenchcoat, that suits the giant's white hair. She blinks once, then looks at her records. "Mr.... Janus, yes? Dr. Frood has been expecting you. Third door down, on the left." Without a word, Janus turns away from the desk, walking with a calm, heavy step down the hallway. Pausing once, he doesn't even knock on the door, pushing it up and stalking into the room. The emaciated, pale figure of Dr. Frood looks up from his desk and adjusts his glasses. "Ah....Janus. Take your seat on the couch and we'll begin, shall we?" Janus stares a hole through Frood, making the psychatrist quiver and supress a twinge of fear in his stomach, before the giant heads over to the couch and lays down on it, crossing his arms over his chest and half-closing his eyes as Dr. Frood takes his seat beside the couch. "Now...you seem a lot calmer, Janus. Have you any reason for being so?" A slight smile crosses the monster's face. "Terrence makes noise, but it doesn't affect me at all." "So he's gone quiet?" "No. He continues to speak to me about wanting control, trying to stay my hand. He's pathetic, really." Frood takes notes. Last time the giant had been in, he had been a lot more vocal about his apparent other personality, exclaiming over how it had been trying to take control of his mind and make him a more peacable giant. After a pause, Frood chooses his next words carefully. "Janus." "Hmm?" "May I...speak...with Terrence?" The giant sits bolt upright on the couch, flipping his hair out of his face and fixing Frood with a stare that could have bored a hole through Antarctic ice. Quivering in fear, the psychiatrist nearly drops his notebook, before Janus frowns and lays back on the couch as if contemplating. The next time he speaks... ...his voice is slightly different. Softer. More amiable. The ever-present frown on Janus' face fades away. "You...wished to talk, Doctor?" "....you are....Terrence...yes? What do you...think...of this current situation?" The giant smiles faintly. "You sound skeptical, Dr. Frood. Yes, that's who I am. As for the situation....Janus is a blood-hungry, violent powermonger...he lives for the thrill of beating the hell out of others in the confines of a wrestling ring..." Frood scribbles down notes furiously, then looks up at the peaceable giant. "And you?" "I wanted to entertain the fans...they Liked me...and then the matches got more brutal...and Janus took over." As Frood opens his mouth to ask another question, the seven footer's hands fly to his temples, and he rubs them furiously as if trying to stave off a headache, shaking his head, and that perpetual scowl on his face slides back on. "See, Frood? He's a whiner, nothing more. Can't you prescribe me something to shut him the hell up now?" Frood adds another page of notes to his notebook about how vicious the giant is after Terrence had spoken. Then he shakes his head. "There's drugs I can prescribe...but I can't tell if your case is bad enough to require them." "I HAVE A FUCKING VOICE IN MY HEAD AND YOU CAN'T TELL!?!!" Janus stands up from the couch, the volume of his voice rising as he glares down at Frood. Without a word, the giant storms past the psychatrist's chair and out the door, slamming it behind him. Faintly, the receptionist's 'have a nice day' is heard being cut off by an angry "ARGH" from Janus. Frood pauses, and then turns his attention to one of the side doors. The figure who emerges makes sure to stay out of view as he speaks. "Well...he seems to have a lot of problems." "That he does...I don't usually let others listen in on my clients, Mr...?" The figure smiles faintly. "Call me Markus." And then he too walks out the door, that faint smile still on his features, leaving Frood all alone in his office. Checking his notes, Frood contemplates. ~Professional interest be damned, I'm not giving a unique case like this ANY drugs...I hope Mr. Markus has some idea of what he can do...~

Opening Promo - Open for rent ~ Kingsly comes out and tells us all his secrets. Handicap Beezel & Johnny Dangerous v. Xero ~Johnny B(eezel) Dangerous Singles Match Kris v. Ejiro Fasaki ~Mag Seven pride. Rule to pick up the win. U.S. Title Match Michael Craven © v. Mike Van Siclen ~I've faced Mike innumerable times, while I've never fought Craven. That said, the smarmy facey Mikey to get the win. Singles Match Kross v. Judge Mental (Hearford) ~Justice, naturally. Non-Title Singles Match Tom Flesher v. Jay Dawg ~Flesher is Superior. JD is a hardcore maniac. Flesher to win because DQs and such are in effect. Non-Title No Escape Steel Cage Match Frost v. Janus ~I'm seriously fired up for taking on Frost - as I said in that 'what would you like to do in the fed' thread ages ago - and if I'm lucky, I'll pick up the win. And for the record...I'm finishing my match up as I type. Main Event Singles Match "TNT" Taylor Nicholas Thompson v. El Luchadore Magnifico ~Hrm...I'll root for TNT. Just because I like his theme.

Just don't get too confident, Frosty, and remember... Confident, cocky, lazy, dead. I'm looking forward to this. \m/

Thoth is teh sexy. ....who the hell IS that on the shirt, anyway?

Come the holidays, I'm going to claim one of those JnR hoodies. MUAHA~!