Gary Floyd

-Richard Laymon's book "The Woods Are Dark" -New garbage cans (old ones are filled with holes, and no matter how much I try, they refuse to be clean) -A few DVD's

I've been listening to a lot of old Country music lately.

Happy birthday Steviekick.

20.) Sugar Hill (1974) Plot: When the mob kills the boyfriend of Sugar Hll (Marki Bey), she turns to Mama Maitresse (Zara Cully) and Voodoo god Baron Samedi (Don Pedro Colley) for revenge. Review: The only Blaxploitation movie to involve zombies other than Petey Wheatstraw, "Sugar Hill" and it's PG rating may mean that it isn't as graphic or fun as say, Petey, Dolemite, or Coffy, but it's still a lot of fun regardless. For one thing, the movie, much like a Rudy Ray Moore movie, doesn't take itself too seriously, and has a lot of fun with genre conventions (the stereotypical white Southern villains for example), and also offers som fun one liners ("hope you like to eat white trash!") It also helps that the performances from Bey and Colley are a lot of fun-especially Colley, who hams it up with the best of them. The zombies themselves aren't flesh eaters, but instead gray, cobweb covered ex-slaves with machetes who do Sugar's bidding. It might not be a classic, but "Sugar Hill" is a nice guilty pleasure that, while not standing up to the likes of Cotton Comes To Harlem, still offers some fun. Great theme song too. Shame it isn't on DVD yet. Rating: 7.5/10 A fun cult nugget from the 70's that should please Blaxploitation fans. Next Review: Messiah of Evil

Eh, it won't last long.

19.) Erotic Nights of the Living Dead (1980) Plot: Like you're watching this for a plot synopsis. Review: Porn and Zombies? Yep, it's been done before: Porno Holocaust, Erotic Orgasm, Naked Lovers, and to a far lesser (and grosser) extent, Porn of the Dead are proof that some want to see flesh eating cadavers and people fucking in the same movie. Hey, whatever gets you off, I guess. Now, from the man who gave you the notorious Anthropophagous and it's sequel Absurd comes (pun intended) "Erotic Nights of the Living Dead." First, how does it work as a porno? Well, there's a memorable sequence involving a woman, a wine bottle, and a cork. Other than that, this is rather tame. Sure, there's sex, but for the most part, it largely isn't that hardcore-George Eastman (who also wrote the movie) even keeps his pants on during sex. Also, the sex itself isn't really that erotic. So, how about the zombies? Well, the good news is, they are great, and quite creepy. Nearing the end, the movie even builds upon some atmosphere, and the gore is pretty good (yes, we do see a guy getting his cock bitten off.) However, the scenes of the undead doing their thing (no, the zombies don't fuck) are often inter cut with sex scenes, which ends up being distracting as a whole. That ends up being a problem, as it becomes clear that director Joe D'amoto* doesn't know what kind of movie he wants to do. In the end, it doesn't work that well as a porno, and as a zombie movie, it works better. However, the two just don't see eye to eye. * Apart from Anthropophagus, D'amato also directed "Porno Holocaust" and "Erotic Orgasm. He's mostly known however, for directing the MST3K favorite Ator The Invincible. Rating: 4/10 A missed opportunity to say the least. Who keeps their pants on during sex anyway? Next Time: Sugar Hill.

Criterion is releasing "Vampyr" Tuesday, and re-releasing "Salo" August 26. I'm totally getting "Vampyr."

Pet rats are awesome. My 5th grade class had one, and it was the cutest thing.

18.) Let's Scare Jessica To Death (1971) Plot: Jessica (Zohra Lampert) is let out of a mental ward, and moves into a country home with friends. So, what's with the strange drifer girl (Gretchen Corbett)? Or the vampire in the lake? Or the townspeople with those odd scars? Review: The term "lost classic" gets thrown around a lot, especially in the horror genre. Hardcore fans such as yours truly love to mention movies like Vampyr, Horrors Of Malformed Men, The Strange Vice of Mrs. Wardh, and others as examples of why we should continue to dig for great but overlooked horror movies. One movie that gets thrown around by such fans is John Hancock's 1971 classic "Let's Scare Jessica To Death." The movie itself is not a gorefest-bloodshed is quite limited within the movie-but what it lacks in disembowelments it makes up for in creeping dread and atmosphere. Throughout most of the movie, we are unsure what is real or what is a dream, as Jessica's paranoia reaches a fever pitch level, and the atmosphere clouds over the viewer, up to the conclusion. The dead in the movie are not rotting corpses bent on destruction, but are instead undead townspeople who you can't trust, bringing to mind the classic Invasion of the Body Snatchers. Also, just like Children Shouldn't Play With Dead Things, Messiah Of Evil, and I Drink Your Blood, "Jessica" serves and a condemnation of hippie culture-and may be the biggest middle finger-the biggest proverbial fuck you-to the culture, as it reveals many of the things that destroyed it, and it wasn't authority figures either: bickering, in fighting, egos, the looming sense of comformity, acid drenched delusions, paranoia, and more figure into the movie. The overriding message of the film seems to be that even without authority and police figures, the hippie movement was doomed to fail from the get go-only it would end up destroying itself instead of the other way around. "Let's Scare Jessica To Death" is a great horror movie, and deserves it's cult reputation. Rating: 9/10 One of the best horror movies from the 70's you haven't seen or heard of. Recommended. Next Time: Erotic Nights of the Living Dead

I think that the problem I have with the album is a similar problem I had with Hip Hop Is Dead: The production largely sounds lazy. It works on some tracks ("Queens Gets The Money") and Doesn't on others ("Make the World Go 'Round") Also, the album has both two potential best songs of the year ("Queens", "Fried Chicken") and two potential worse ("Sly Fox", "Testify"-ugh, I'm going to pretend that one doesn't exist for now.) It's not a bad album, it's just so-so.

I'd go on about how much I loved it, but everyone else already said it all.

"I GOT SHOT!" "I got shot!" "NO, I GOT SHOT, FOR REAL!" "No, I got shot for real!" I am so disappointed you guys referenced that before I could.

Advanced word has been mixed, as it's been playing in the festival circuit for a while. I'll see it if I have a chance, though I don't have high hopes. Then again, Lovecraft isn't exactly the easiest author to adapt.

17.) The Dead Hate The Living! (2000) Plot: A band of would be filmmakers go to an abandoned hospital, and find a real dead body-which they use for the movie. It ends up opening a portal to hell-and unleashing some zombies. Review: I make no apologies whatsoever when I say that I like the movie Scream. Sure, I may lose cred to some horror nerds, but I answer only to myself, thank you. I don't like though, what came after "Scream": A series of annoying, self aware horror movies that thought they were clever, but weren't. Case in point: "The Dead Hate The Living", released by the one interesting Full Moon Studios, is proof that a love for zombie movies does not make a good zombie movie. The movie is full of references to other, better horror movies: Return of the Living Dead, The Beyond, Cannibal Ferox, to name a few-and while it's heart seems to be in the right place, it all comes off as fanboyish nonsense, which is essentially what it is. Not only that, it's bad fanboyish nonsense. The acting is non-existence, the references to Bruce Campbell and Fangoria are annoying, the soundtrack-filled with bad horror punk, psychobilly, and horrorcore rap-is grating, and the mugging for the camera hurts as well. To be fair, the zombie and gore FX are decent, but they aren't enough to save this dreck from being any good. Writer/Director David Parker would go on to write the notoriously bad House of the Dead (no, he's not happy with the way it turned out-can't say I blame him), and was originally attached to direct a Michael vs. Pinhead movie, though that movie never came to pass thank God. He also acted in the movie Free Enterprise, which is actually a pretty damn good comedy. Amazingly, when "Dead Hate The Living!" came out, some were praising Parker as one of horror's next big things, which shows how bad the shape of the genre was in at the time. After HOTD, his career never took off or fully recovered. Rating: 2/10 Proof that while anyone can make a zombie movie, not everyone can make a good one. Next Review: Let's Scare Jessica To Death

Eh, not terrible, but not great either. Way too much slow motion. Dr. Manhatten and Mars look good though.

I'm starting to think he'll be dead before then. It's only a matter of time really.

The only OTP (God, I hate terms like that) that I generally like on a TV show is Dean Venture and Triana Orpheus. It's so awkward, it's hilarious (and yes, even a little cute.) I just hope it all ends with Dean finally getting laid...then becoming a total dick. Come on, the thought of that is funny.

Huh huh, you said "hardball"

I've seen it before. To say it's nothing special is an understatement.

Andy Dick Arrested for Groping 17 year old girl Also, holy shit his mugshot

16.) Night of the Sorcerers (1973) Plot: A team of researchers go to Africa end up running into Leopard Vampire Goddesses and their zombie minions. Review: From the man who gave us the "Blind Dead" series comes "Night of the Sorcerers", a wonderfully tacky exploitation mini-masterpiece. First things first: this movie will offend some people. The African natives are portrayed stereotypically (you expect somebody to say "where all the white women at?" at any point"), with grass skirts, masks, voodoo rituals, and kidnapping white women, among other things. Those sensitive to such things should avoid this. Those who fully embrace exploitation movies though, may have a blast. Yes, it's gleefully politically incorrect, but it's an exploitation movie. What do you expect? While there may not be a huge amount of zombie action, the movie fulfills it's exploitation elements: whippings, rape, zombies, vampirism, orgiastic voodoo ceremonies, gory beheadings, a face melted by acid, gratuitous nudity, melodramatic overacting, a fun score, hot chicks in leopard skin bikinis-what's not to love? "Night of the Sorcerers" is not for everyone, but those who love exploitation at it's cheesiest will be in heaven. Rating: 8/10 A real blast for fans of Eurotrash cinema. Come back tomorrow for: The Dead Hate The Living.

Way to report on a story that's 22 years old Seriously, Huffington Post is full of pussies. This is coming from a fellow liberal/Obama supporter.