Gary Floyd

Metalocalypse slash makes no sense to me, considering that everyone in the band essentially hates each other. Hell, Slash in itself makes no sense. "Hey, here's two guys who hate each other and have no interest in each other sexually. Let's read/write about them fucking."

Yes.

Jonathan the Impaler is going to win. Well, I wish that was the case.

Frank Zappa-"Your Mouth"

15.) Sole Survivor (1983) Plot: The only survivor of a plane crash finds herself being followed by the dead-to finish the job death planned for her. Review: The plot may sound a lot like that of Final Destination, but that's where the similarities end. What we end up getting is an original, relatively gore free horror flick, and anunderrated zombie movie that owes more to Carnival of Souls than Zombi 2. The most intriguing aspect of the movie is it's treatment of the zombies. These are not mindless, flesh eating hordes, or corpses brought back by a chemical leak or voodoo. These are a cruel parody of death, working for the reaper, and working with a serious purpose. They are quite creepy too, and bring forth an aura of serious dread and menace reminiscent of the dead found in underrated fare like Dead & Buried and Messiah of Evil. The acting is also strong, with Anita Skinner playing a convincing lead character. Director Thom Eberhardt would go on to direct the more tongue and cheek apocalyptic zombie movie Night of the Comet, as well as Gross Anatomy and to a lesser extent, Captain Ron. As it stands though, this is his best movie. It's now out on DVD thanks to Code Red (complete with linear notes by genre authority Stephen Thrower), and is worth your money. I recommend it. Rating: 9/10 One of the best 80's horror movies you haven't seen, "Sole Survivor" is an underrated gem. Check it out. Next Time: Night of the Sorcerers

It comes out next week, and I'm sure I'm not the only guy looking forward to it, so here's where we anticipate it/talk about that other comic book movie that's coming out this July. Returning this time around: Ron Perlman, Selma Blair, Doug Jones (whose also voiceing Abe this time), Jeffrey Tambour (sic?), and a few others. Oh, and director Guillermo del Toro. New this time: Luke Goss, Seth Macfalene (As Johan Krauss), and a few others Official Site Apple Site. Rotten Tomatoes Site.

Speaking of Wal-Mart, the place (and other public stores) in 2-3:00 in the morning amuse me, since they have all manner of people you don't see too mcuh during the day. It's great really.

14.) Swamp Of The Ravens (1974) Plot: Dr. Frosta preys on Beggars and Gypsies so he can continue his work on the dead. When his girlfriend leaves him, things get pretty bad. Review: A Spanish/American co-production, "Swamp Of the Ravens" is a good example of a meat and potatoes exploitation movie: it might not meet all the requirements, but it still has enough to count some. The movie itself isn't that much of a zombie movie, as the doctor's failed experiments float and hang around the swamp. It's really more of a Mad Scientist movie, with plenty of evil doings and little if any zombie action. Also, there aren't many ravens in this swamp-there's a lot of buzzards though. Still, the movie has enough sleaze and weirdness to make it watchable. This includes a little gore (including real life autopsy footage), nudity (including necrophilia-not that graphic though), a score that sounds like outtakes from a Yes album, and a weird lounge act with a ventriloquist.They sure don't make 'em like this anymore. "Swamp Of The Ravens" is a decent time waster: it might not meet all of your hopes, but it's watchable, and has it's moments nonetheless. Rating: As a zombie movie, 2/10, but as an old school exploitation movie, it gets 6/10. Tomorrow: Sole Survivor.

TDK will make a certain amount of money.

This really made me laugh.

Hotel for 4 nights = $350 (And thats probably a mid range 2 to 3 star hotel at $75 a night plus taxes booked online) Food for 4 days = $100 ($25 a day which isn't much these days) Admission to Cedar Point for 2 days, parking = $85 Souvenirs and food at Cedar Point = $75 (I always buy a TShirt for a Coaster I've ridden and Im probably gonna eat/drinlk another $40 worth in 2 days easy ) Orioles game ticket/food/parking = $75 Gas for the trip = $150?? (probably at least 3 fillups @ $50 each by this time next year, but who knows) total = $835 (and this is just for me, no one else lol) Id rather set aside $25 a week into a savings account for 48 weeks (11 months) to pay for it then to try and budget it out of my money in my checking account next summer. It should give me about $1200 which should be enough. That's a lot of time, money and effort wasted on a amusement park that is hardly worth any of it. You're joking..right? Cedar Point is the Roller Coaster Capital of the World and 2nd oldest park in North America. They have 17 total roller coasters with the most in the world that top 200 feet. It takes at least 2 days to ride every coaster, something Ive managed to do in 1 day at every other park Ive been to (Kings Dominion in VA and Carrowinds in NC, Busch Gardens in VA, Six Flags in MD/NJ* and Hershey Park) Not to mention this trip also has an Orioles game planned into it as well. * with the exception of Kingda Ka which wasnt open the day I went Marvin's Top 5 Roller Coasters 1. El Toro - 6 Flags Great Adventure (Im not a huge fan of "woodies" but this was the best coaster Ive ever riden, didnt really feel like a wooden coaster) 2. Volcano: Blast Coaster - Kings Dominion VA (the 4 hour long wait for a 45 second ride was worth it) 3. Superman: Ride of Steel - 6 Flags America (Nice long, fast steel coaster) 4. Nitro - 6 Flags Great Adventure/ Apollo's Chariot - Busch Gardens VA (TIE) (basically the same coaster IIRC, real fast and long) 5. Batwing - 6 Flags America (the feeling of flying was nice and riding it in the pouring rain enhanced the experience) with Honorable Mention to Curse of Dar Kastle (Busch Gardens) even though it was a simulator ride. Worst 5 Rollercoasters 1. Loch Ness Monster - Busch Gardens VA (my shoulders were purple and black for 2 weeks after going to Busch Gardens and this ride was responsible) 2. Great American Scream Machine - 6 Flags Great Adventure (serious bruising on my shoulders and a really rough ride) 3. The Joker's Jinx - 6 Flags America (beats your head back and forth to the side on the head restraints..headache inducing) 4. Anaconda - Kings Dominion (I barely fit into the seat and this was 10 years ago) 5. Stormrunner - Hershey Park (I rode this a couple weeks ago, they should sell the ride to the WWF Niagra thing and call it Carlito's Back Cracker, I litterally heard my back crack when the thing went from 0-70 mph in 2 seconds..) With honorable mention to the Spongebob Squarepants "4-D ride" at 6 Flags Great Adventure (My GF is big Spongebob fan..ugh) but I heard they took it down. This is the most depressing post I've read in a good while.

"Don't Go in the House"-not exactly a feel good movie. That blowtorch scene , oh man...

That's awesome. The director said if this one was a hit, then he'd try to get Bruce Campbell in the 3rd one. Guess this bodes well.

It's even better when they sue McDonalds because they have diabetes.

The Cool Kids-"88"

13.) The Child (1977) Plot:A newly hired housekeepr must take care of a spoiled, troubled kid named Rosalie, who has telekinetic powers. She uses these powers to summon her friends-a group of malevolent zombies-to do her bidding. Review: "The Child" is a flawed but watchable entity. Shot for about $30,000, the movie played in drive ins and Grindhouses as part of a double bill with Fredrick Friedels' odd Axe, and is something of a minor cult classic in some respects. The movie has it's share of flaws: poor acting (Rosalie Cole is particularly annoying as the evil Rosalie), and the score (an overbearing mix of bad synth squalls and overwrought piano), as well as taking what feels like an eternity to get going. When it does get going though, the movie picks up considerably. The onslaught of the undead, while not huge, is still great stuff, and the make up effects for the zombies is quite good and original, especially when you consider the budget. The movie eventually channels Night of the Living Dead with it's zombie seige conclusion, though it still works. "The Child" is not a perfect movie, and doesn't exactly come with a recommendation, but it's a decent timewaster, and would make a great double bill with Bob Clark's Children Shouldn't Play With Dead Things. Rating: 6.5 "The Child" is a cult oddity that should please fans of mini-budget weirdness. Next on the plate: The Swamp of the Ravens

"Bug" is a brilliant movie that Lionsgate marketed wrong. If anything, it's a character drama first, a horror movie second, and a black comedy third. Anyways, obese people in movie theaters annoy me. They have all these artery clogging foods (and diet soda-what is with fat people and diet soda?), and seeing their grease soaked fingers and lips horfing down the stuff loudly gets to me to no end. The fact that they are really loud and obnoxious doesn't help either.

Banders was a great gimmick though.

Hey Bruiser, you were right about The Bake Sale EP.

Dear Green Party: You are Idiots

I remember seeing him on both "The Daily Show" and "Real Time" (a show I don't watch often) and he seemed like a really nice guy.

I'll try to give the book a shot sometime Rando. Anyways, I'm reading "The Ghastly One: The Sex-Gore Netherworld of Filmmaker Andy Milligan" at the moment.