The One and Only RAW Thread for December 16, 2002

[Guest AndrewTS]

No Raw Preview means Raw is still being written as we speak which means it will be a total and other mess which will lead to nothing and be forgotten next week.

 

Sigh...

Niko

I can picture Gerwitz on the crapper with a pen and a roll of TP as we speak.

[Guest nikowwf]

There is a link to the Raw preview on WWE.com's main page, which leads to the preview for....LAST WEEK.

 

double sigh...

niko

[Guest the pinjockey]

I can picture Gerwitz on the crapper with a pen and a roll of TP as we speak.

Lets see how many jokes does this line open up. Raw being booked while a writer is taking a dump. Oh, the sweet irony.

[Guest AndrewTS]

I can picture Gerwitz on the crapper with a pen and a roll of TP as we speak.

Lets see how many jokes does this line open up. Raw being booked while a writer is taking a dump. Oh, the sweet irony.

I can also imagine this is where the Rikishi "pre-match ritual" idea came up.

 

And maybe Regal pissing on Big Show's leg.

[Guest AndrewTS]

There is a link to the Raw preview on WWE.com's main page, which leads to the preview for....LAST WEEK.

 

double sigh...

niko

Too bad, I hoped we might at least be getting a hint that Some Guy would be facing Other Guy.

[Guest nikowwf]

RAW preview for tonight, Dec. 16

RAW comes to you live tonight on the new TNN at 9/8 CT.

 

Just 24 hours after winning the World Heavyweight Championship, we will hear from Triple H. What does the future hold for the new champ, as well as Shawn Michaels? Find out tonight on RAW.

 

Scott Steiner is scheduled to be at RAW tonight? Will Big Poppa Pump sign with Eric Bischoff or will he screw him over as he did Stephanie?

 

Trish Stratus will team up with Test tonight to take on the tandem of Victoria and Steven Richards. Undoubtedly, Test will have Stacy and his Testicles in his corner for this one.

 

Also, the Dudleys are set to take on William Regal and Lance Storm.

 

Two Tough Enough graduates will square off tonight when Christopher Nowinski battles Tough Enough 1 Champion Maven.

 

In a handicapped match, Kane will team up with the high-flying Rob Van Dam to take on 3-Minute Warning and Batista. Will Kane find the revenge he is looking for after falling to Batista last night at Armageddon?

 

One-half of the new World Tag Team Champions Goldust will go one-on-one with Christian, as Booker T has signed on to face Chris Jericho.

 

Don't miss RAW when it kicks off at 9/8 CT on the new TNN!

 

Niko

[Guest AndrewTS]

RAW preview for tonight, Dec. 16

RAW comes to you live tonight on the new TNN at 9/8 CT.

 

Just 24 hours after winning the World Heavyweight Championship, we will hear from Triple H. What does the future hold for the new champ, as well as Shawn Michaels? Find out tonight on RAW.

 

Oh great...we get to hear from both of them. I'm all a-tingle.

 

Scott Steiner is scheduled to be at RAW tonight? Will Big Poppa Pump sign with Eric Bischoff or will he screw him over as he did Stephanie?

How did Scotty screw Steph over? She didn't put out so he didn't sign. Eric is offering lots of whores, and he already said he doesn't want to sign with Steph. He pretty much confirmed Raw. Geez...

 

Trish Stratus will team up with Test tonight to take on the tandem of Victoria and Steven Richards. Undoubtedly, Test will have Stacy and his Testicles in his corner for this one.

 

So, either Test will put his nads in a little glass jar by the corner, or all of his fans can easily be fit in the corner of a ring. Hm...wonder which one it is.

 

And I was digging Test the past couple weeks. He didn't wrestle at all.

 

Also, the Dudleys are set to take on William Regal and Lance Storm.

 

I like Storm, but I don't care about this match.

 

Two Tough Enough graduates will square off tonight when Christopher Nowinski battles Tough Enough 1 Champion Maven.

 

"Graduates?" Nowinski lost TE. Oh, and this is the momentous battle that they baited and switched at at the PPV. Demand refunds, folks!

 

In a handicapped match, Kane will team up with the high-flying Rob Van Dam to take on 3-Minute Warning and Batista. Will Kane find the revenge he is looking for after falling to Batista last night at Armageddon?

 

Except for Blahtista, I called this exactly (as well as the Nowinski/Maven match). So THIS is how they build intrigue--Kane beat the fat inbred Samoans clean but couldn't beat Batista. RVD couldn't beat Batista and had Sunday off. JR will call Batista a hoss and put him over huge.

 

Handicap matches suck, everyone but RVD in this match sucks, and whenever RVD isn't in the ring the fans won't give a shit.

Either RVD or Flair will be the most over person in this whole damn mess.

 

One-half of the new World Tag Team Champions Goldust will go one-on-one with Christian, as Booker T has signed on to face Chris Jericho.

 

Oh well, I see no #1 contendership stip there, but at least Booker won't be pulling a Kane and going for the title while holding the tag titles.

 

I guess Steiner is HHH's next opponent. Yay.

 

Don't miss RAW when it kicks off at 9/8 CT on the new TNN!

 

Niko

 

Yup, on the new The National Network.

 

It'll make a fine background noise while I prep for my Bi Sci final tomorrow.

[Guest razazteca]

so RVD is back in the low midcard again, I guess it would make a good opening match. Maybe its time for RVD to turn heel and just walk away from the match when Kane goes for the hot tag.

[Guest BoboBrazil]

Booker vs Jericho should be good and Steiner's appearance should be as well. The rest looks like crap.

[Guest AndrewTS]

Booker vs Jericho should be good and Steiner's appearance should be as well. The rest looks like crap.

Goldust/Christian could be a nice surprise.

 

Why the hell isn't Rico teaming with 3MW?

 

Oh, that's right. We need to squash RVD and put over a hoss at the same time. Silly me.

[Guest Zack Malibu]

When I'm blowing out the candles on my cake tonight, I'll wish for something good to happen, like Triple H getting crushed by a runaway zamboni backstage.

 

I'd like for something good to happen tonight. It's been such a great day, I don't want Trips holding down my birthday wishes dammit.

 

RVD/Kane vs. Team OVW-What the hell? Who booked this one? 3 of the sloppiest workers on RAW on one team against KANE and RVD? Holy cripes, this ones gonna suck. Sorry RVD.

 

So Booker T and Goldust FINALLY win the tag belts, but are in singles action? Yeah, that makes sense.

 

Ah well, at least all is well on the Smackdown side of things...

 

(remembers A-Train attacking Angle, probably setting up a title feud)

 

Shit.

[Guest jester]

You know what? Fuck this. I'm skipping tonight's Raw. I'll read the recaps, which in all probability will tell the tale of a bad to ok wrestling and stupid booking decisions.

[Guest AndrewTS]

When I'm blowing out the candles on my cake tonight, I'll wish for something good to happen, like Triple H getting crushed by a runaway zamboni backstage.

 

I think they'll save that for the anniversary Raw.

 

JR: "STONE COLD!! STONE COLD!! STONE COLD!!...is back in WWE!!"

 

*HHH comes back the next week for Raw*

[LaParkaYourCar 0]

When I'm blowing out the candles on my cake tonight, I'll wish for something good to happen, like Triple H getting crushed by a runaway zamboni backstage.

 

I'd like for something good to happen tonight. It's been such a great day, I don't want Trips holding down my birthday wishes dammit.

 

RVD/Kane vs. Team OVW-What the hell? Who booked this one? 3 of the sloppiest workers on RAW on one team against KANE and RVD? Holy cripes, this ones gonna suck. Sorry RVD.

 

So Booker T and Goldust FINALLY win the tag belts, but are in singles action? Yeah, that makes sense.

 

Ah well, at least all is well on the Smackdown side of things...

 

(remembers A-Train attacking Angle, probably setting up a title feud)

 

Shit.

Actually weren't the Island Boys from HWA not OVW?

[Guest Zack Malibu]

When I'm blowing out the candles on my cake tonight, I'll wish for something good to happen, like Triple H getting crushed by a runaway zamboni backstage.

 

I'd like for something good to happen tonight.  It's been such a great day, I don't want Trips holding down my birthday wishes dammit.

 

RVD/Kane vs. Team OVW-What the hell?  Who booked this one?  3 of the sloppiest workers on RAW on one team against KANE and RVD?  Holy cripes, this ones gonna suck.  Sorry RVD.

 

So Booker T and Goldust FINALLY win the tag belts, but are in singles action?  Yeah, that makes sense.

 

Ah well, at least all is well on the Smackdown side of things...

 

(remembers A-Train attacking Angle, probably setting up a title feud)

 

Shit.

Actually weren't the Island Boys from HWA not OVW?

I think they were in OVW briefly before HWA, but I could be wrong. I swore they made at least a brief appearance there.

 

They need to go back there anyhow.

[Guest MarvinisaLunatic]

Sigh..

 

Patriots vs Titans should be a good game..

 

Ill still watch RAW at midnight..

[Guest AndrewTS]

When I'm blowing out the candles on my cake tonight, I'll wish for something good to happen, like Triple H getting crushed by a runaway zamboni backstage.

 

I'd like for something good to happen tonight.  It's been such a great day, I don't want Trips holding down my birthday wishes dammit.

 

RVD/Kane vs. Team OVW-What the hell?  Who booked this one?  3 of the sloppiest workers on RAW on one team against KANE and RVD?  Holy cripes, this ones gonna suck.  Sorry RVD.

 

So Booker T and Goldust FINALLY win the tag belts, but are in singles action?  Yeah, that makes sense.

 

Ah well, at least all is well on the Smackdown side of things...

 

(remembers A-Train attacking Angle, probably setting up a title feud)

 

Shit.

Actually weren't the Island Boys from HWA not OVW?

I think they were in OVW briefly before HWA, but I could be wrong. I swore they made at least a brief appearance there.

 

They need to go back there anyhow.

Yeah, OVW did wonders for Big Show and Mark Henry.

[Guest BoboBrazil]

OVW did do wonders for Mark Henry. He was in great shape, but WWE made him do the strong man contest, so he had to become a fatass again. He was doing to like 280 or 290 in OVW.

[Guest Ram]

Booker vs. Jericho, Dust vs. Christian, those I can dig.

 

Unfortunately that's only 6 minutes of a 2 hour show. *sigh*

[Guest AndrewTS]

OVW did do wonders for Mark Henry. He was in great shape, but WWE made him do the strong man contest, so he had to become a fatass again. He was doing to like 280 or 290 in OVW.

So...WWE sent him there to lose weight, to become a fatass again.

 

....

 

Oh well, they've done stupider things.

[Guest razazteca]

if Ric Flair does all the talking for HHH then it will be a good show.

[Guest AndrewTS]

if Ric Flair does all the talking for HHH then it will be a good show.

Since when have they wanted to have it be a good show?

 

The return of the twenty-minute HHH promo it is!!

[ChrisMWaters 0]

Is there any way that we can get HHH to have an injury like Kevin Nash?

[Guest Flyboy]

You know what? Fuck this. I'm skipping tonight's Raw.

New England Patriots Vs. Tennessee Titans, baybee!

[Guest chirs3]

What SHOULD Happen - HBK comes out, gives heartfelt goodbye, and says he's ready to pass the torch... but not to Triple H. Shawn asks as one last favor to Bischoff to book RVD/HHH tonight for the title, and ANYONE WHO INTERFERES WILL BE FIRED. HBK puts over Rob as the future of the sport. RVD wins... CLEAN...

 

What Probably Will Happen - HBK comes out, gives heartfelt goodbye, and calls Triple H the best in the world. Demands the audience respect Triple H. All hail Triple H. He's God, you know.

[Guest AndrewTS]

Will RVD show up stoned tonight?

[Conspiracy_Victim 0]

OK so we get HBK to come out to start the show, tells everyone that the better man won. HHH comes out with a gagged Flair and tells Shawn that he's worthless, the whole roster is worthless, and everyone should worship him as the God of Wrestling. The whole roster comes out, encircles the ring, and gets on their knees and bows down to HHH. Mr. Rizin then puts on Aztec sun god robes and everyone in the crowd throws little pickles at him.

 

OK maybe I channeled Real Genius there, but you get the idea. Let the 2 hour HHH blow job begin. I just hope he has the common courtesy to give the audience a reach around.

 

Damn Real Genius and Full Metal Jacket references in one post. Cool.

[ChrisMWaters 0]

You know...there is a kinda faint hope in me that HHH keeps the World Title at least until the end of January.

 

That way, he can't get involved into the Royal Rumble match. >=)

[Guest midnight_burn]

Looks like the road to RVD jobbing to Batista clean on some upcoming PPV starts tonight, hooray.

[Guest The Electrifyer]

I wish I liked football, so that way, there's something else on TV I can watch instead of Raw.