Forewarned 0 Report post Posted April 4, 2003 PROMO: In the dank, dark hallways of the latest arena to hold the distinct honor of having a SWF House Show featuring the likes of Crow and Tryst taking on Johnny Dangerous and Kris respectively, the one and only IGNWF hardcore icon to currently grace the SWF stage is seen stalking past empty locker rooms, dragging a steel chair while wearing his common wrestling gear along with a leather jacket that seems to be made from scraps of lesser leather jackets. He sneers as he sees the cameraman and gives him a look of pure and utter disgust that can only be given by the man called… BenH: “Neilsen!” Benjamin Hardy appears on screen, racing towards the Hardcore King. BenH: “Neilsen! On Storm, you’re in a Referee’s Revenge Handicapped Match against-!” CRACK! A right hand cracks Benjamin’s jaw, he crashes to the floor, Neilsen swoops down, swipes the man’s microphone and- NotJ: “F**k you!” The camera turns and seems to start racing down the- NotJ: “Not you mother f**ker!” The camera turns back and heads closer to the Jungle King. NotJ: “F**k you. That goes out to the only man that truly deserves it. That goes out to the man that is holding me back. That goes out to the man who denies me. That goes out to Suicide!” Ben shakes on the floor and gasps out… BenH: “…Suicide…King? Neilsen kicks him. NotJ: “No, you stupid son of a bitch! Sui-f**kin’-cide! There is only one King in this f**kin’ industry and he is a man that leads by example. He is a man heads and shoulders above the rest. He is a man that can miss a year of action and still be better than anyone can ever f**kin’ hope to be in this Fed! He is Neilsen and he is pissed!” Neilsen pants and then whips his eyes at the cameraman. NotJ: “I came back! I came f**kin’ back Suicide and what did you do? You give me an ICTV Title shot! You give me a match for a belt that would prevent these f**kin’ fans from seeing me at my best! You should be happy I even f**kin’ showed Heartboy… These people didn’t deserve me! They didn’t appreciate me. They didn’t f**kin’ honor me and…of all f**kin’ people…you should know what that’s like…heh…well…at least you think you do. See, unlike you, I, Neilsen, deserves their adoration. I, Neilsen, should be honored. Unlike you, I, f**kin’ Neilsen, is the greatest name in the history of this company! And all this that your dumb f**kin’ ass thinks you deserve, I truly do. I am a true f**kin’ legend…un…like…you.” NotJ: “Queen, you hold me down! You give me a bullsh*t title shot while your big fat bitch of a BUTT buddy Hville F**kin’ Thugg gets a World Title shot on his return! He might be three times the f**kin’ weight but he isn’t even half the f**kin’ talent of the only true King this Federation has ever f**kin’ seen! So, I threw that title down in disgust of you, of the total bullsh*t and disrespect it represented to me and because of the lack of acknowledgement I got from the current fans, fans that think these two rejects, the two prime examples of all that is wrong with this federation, that these so-called men are actually people deserving of respect. That…that…heh…that is almost, ALMOST, as wrong as not giving me…the proper respect… But see, despite your hope that I’d lose Sui, despite your prayers that Frost would f**kin’ end me, despite your hope that the people would never get to see the awe-inspiring ability that is Neilsen and then realize that your nothing but a second rate hack… Despite it all, I won! And I did the only thing something that a man with at least half a f**kin’ sack would do…I threw down a belt that was a sign of the utter contempt the owner of the company has for me! Goddammit, I f**kin’ hate you Queen!” Neilsen shakes his head. NotJ: “And now…now that I’ve called you on it. Now that through your own ineptitude these people are starting to recognize me for who and what I am…now you realize that not only did I do the right thing by throwing down that belt, but the ‘trials’ you’ve put me through since the PPV have only caused my legend to grow! Wildchild was put down like the beast that animalistic warrior is and the fans might deny it…but they loved it! Craven…you gave me Craven in a ‘not quite’ hardcore match? Are you a f**kin’ reject!?! Wait, no, I know the answer to that already, but you give me a hardcore match against that cocky bastard and you think that these fans would still hate me? After seeing me in all my true glory, glory they wouldn’t see with the ICTV title around my waist, you thought they wouldn’t cheer my name? Christ Hearty, these people aren’t as stupid as you… They know a winner when they see one. And then, you book me in a match for the Hardcore Gamer’s Championship!” Neilsen smirks. NotJ: “See, I didn’t win, but that title is one I would never, f**kin’ ever!, throw down! I AM Neilsen of the Mother F**kin’ Jungle! I AM the King of Hardcore and without that title it’d never have f**kin’ happened! See that belt, one you, and so many of these little bitch wrestlers around here demean, that is without a doubt the single most important title in this f**kin’ Federation. Forget the ICTV title, forget the piece of trash that is the U.S. Championship, forget even the World F**kin’ Title! The only reason I will even win that belt, and trust me…heh…one day I will. Whether it’s from TNT, Flesher, Frost, ELM or Kross…one day it will be mine… But the only reason I want it is so everyone, everyone, f**kin’ EVERYONE!, has to bow down and praise me as they already should be doing! Some…heh…some already are… But the HCG title…do you people even know what that means? It means that no matter what people throw at you, no matter what they use, pure wrestling skill, weaponry, numbers, no matter what they have, you overcome it! You fight back! You f**kin’ win! You are the single most indestructible warrior in this federation. If you are the Champion, the entire Mag 7 can attack you and if you still win, you are a God! If the technical greatest wrestler in the company faces you and you beat him with a chair shot, you took his best and survived while he couldn’t even deal with steel on skull. The HCG Champion is the single most versatile wrestler in the Federation! He is the only unprotected champion in the company! TNT can run like a bitch from Flesher and keep his title! MVS can’t! He has to fight night in and night out, leave his blood, his soul, his very f**kin’ lifeforce in that ring while the World Champion rarely bleeds! The very title makes it so the Champion takes and has to survive more damage than any other title holder in this bitch! The HCG Champion is the hardest champion to be and the most important as well. G.O.A.T. had the title and used it to leap to the World Championship. Same for Spike. I used it to become a legend and some of you actually don’t want it? You wrestlers in the SWF are more dense than I thought.” Neilsen spits to the side. NotJ: “And I am f**kin’ pissed I lost that match! I was half a second too slow and the ‘great’ technical wrestler Naomi Judge got pinned by Martin Vagsicle. But enough about the past. Dealer, I call you on this sh*t you’ve put me through, it’s gotten me over, yet farther from the World belt than I ever should be. I call you on it and I get the Referee’s Revenge! I get a Handicapped Match against the Imbeciles of Doom! A Jesus looking freak that never wears the same shirt and smiles even as someone beats the living sh*t out of him! And…Lord knows…I’ll beat the sh*t out of f**kin’ Jesus…and Fugly while I’m at it. And then there’s Jaundice, from what I hear he’s a giant yellow freak of nature that appears to be a slimmer second coming of Thugg. And no Janie…that’s not a complement… But I now have to take on a retarded f**kin’ freak, a sickly looking giant and all this with…with…with Eddie f**kin’ Long as a ref? This bitch that has his lips closer to Queen’s ass than the Mag 7! And he has a tazer! Queen, you’re looking at an animal that can’t be put down. A man that fears no one. A person these people pay to see…and that’s why you fear me! You know that as time goes on, as my following grows, as people start to believe in my truly just cause, the cause that is just because it's mine, you will get weaker and weaker and weaker until finally, you just give up trying to stop me and you will then give me exactly what I want. …just do it now Suicide. Give the people what they want to see. Save yourself the pain. Save your dignity. Give me my match. Save yourself the pain." Neilsen looks up with a gleeful glint to his eyes. NotJ: “And if you don’t-well...heh..." Neilsen flies into motion, the chair’s seat fills the screen and- CRACK! -Neilsen can be seen through shattered glass before the picture goes blank. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Forewarned 0 Report post Posted April 4, 2003 My first promo on these boards. [Moment of Silence for Momentous Occasion] I don't want to ruin it for you, but I'm not entirely pleased with it. I did cover most of what I wanted. Mainly the Suicide King issue, but also it touched on the value of the HCG title that some people here don't seem to recognize. Someone even said to me once we should eliminate it and that's pure and utter bullsh*t. But I also briefly tounched on Janus and Fugue. Said I could beat the sh*t out of Jesus Christ. All in all, not too bad. The only thing it's really missing is insults directed at Wilson, but I don't think I could goad him out of retirement. He's too afraid. EDIT-This promo was actually made out of three seperate promos, the majority of which came from a promo after FtF, only it was all directed against the Suicide King and that was before I got his okay to start something. The HCG thing was something I was going to do if I won it, but since I didn't that speech didn't have the passion behind it that would've been there. "you see this! You see this f**kin' title! You know what this means? This means I'm the f**kin' best. It means that no matter what you little f**ks out there throw at me, I'll survive and still f**kin' win!" And so on and so on... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Tyler McClelland Report post Posted April 4, 2003 Awesome job, Neilsen, and I know remember why I picked you to be on the SWF team which fucked everyone up in that stupid RP tournament. (Y) Great read. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Edwin MacPhisto Report post Posted April 4, 2003 Bwa ha ha ha ha. Blissful raaaaaage! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Suicide King Report post Posted April 4, 2003 I take it that you're cancelling our afternoon tea, then? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest HVilleThugg Report post Posted April 4, 2003 Hmmmm...someone should inform Neilson that this isn't IGN anymore. His curses are no longer censored, and he can feel free to swear all he likes!! Cause things were always much better when you could say... NEILSON OF THE (Crowd) - MOTHER FUCKING!!!! JUNGLE! Da "swear away my angry friend...swear away" H Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Tyler McClelland Report post Posted April 4, 2003 The curse censors add flava'. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
janusd 0 Report post Posted April 5, 2003 And then there’s Jaundice, from what I hear he’s a giant yellow freak of nature that appears to be a slimmer second coming of Thugg. And no Janie…that’s not a complement… ....bahahahahahaa. There's a quality about this promo I can't quite place. It's entertaining, yes, but it's nice at stating Neilsen's views and such... Bah, I can't explain it. Except I think I'm liking Neilsen more and more. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
