Promo: "Just a Child"

[Above Average 0]

All is quite in Room 310, at the Holiday Inn Motel, somewhere between Oklahoma and Kentucky. It’s 1 AM. A digital clock on the desk clearly shows this. Mak Francis blinks now positive that he isn’t going to sleep anytime soon.

 

***

 

*Ding*

 

“I need to go out, any place is better than here, right now.” says Mak forcefully, startling the sleeping man at the front desk, after tapping the bell.

 

“Huh—out…?” The guys’ nametag says ‘John’ and clearly John is still half-asleep. “Yes John. Out.” John rubs the sleep out of his eyes and re gathers himself. “You sure, you’re not looking too hot.”

 

“I just… don’t want to sleep…” mumbles Francis, putting on shades to cover his eyes, even though it’s nearly half past one in the morning.

 

“Well,” he says, pondering the options, “if your looking for some chicks, there’s a bar—”

 

“Nah, I kinda have a girl and gotta’ be sober tomorrow... if I go there now, there ain’t a chance that I will be… not that I’m even 20 yet, let alone 21…”

 

 

A pause.

 

 

“…I’m still just a teenager. For a little while anyway…”

 

The desk attendant looks at him for a second, acknowledging this fact by nodding his head. “You could try the college… it’s the middle of the week, so their gym is open till 4. A lot of us students can’t get there at normal hours, you know, with the studying.” He pauses. “I’m sure there’s something to do there and it’s only a few miles away. But you’ll need someone to sign you in…”

 

“You said us students right? Wanna hit the gym up.”

 

John looks around and smiles. “Sorry… I'm bored enough to do that, but I can't go. Gotta pay the bills, but this chick I know works the desk, well after two anyway. Give it a half an hour and her shift will start. I'll give her cell a call.”

 

***

 

Francis dances in front of the heavy bag for a second, catching his breath, as it’s evident he’s been going at it for a while, since his shirt is covered in sweat. It’s a new start in a string of punching sessions.

 

*Pop—pop… Pop*

 

Two straight jabs followed by a right to the heavy bag. This is a defining moment. It’s time to see if I’ve got what it takes…

 

*Pop… Pop—pop*

 

A hooking left and another two strikes with the right. King handpicked Drazon to come after me, and I barely pulled out a win at the World title tournament. King wouldn’t pick him unless he though he could end my reign. But I thought he was on our side against Flesher and the Mag 7. And I really don’t know what the deal with Sacred is. Everything’s just so confusing…

 

*Pop!*

 

An out of control right. “I don’t know what to do…

 

*Pop! Pop! Pop!*

 

 

…And you always did.”

 

*POP—POP—POP—POP—POP—POP—POP—POP—POP*

 

Mak swings away with multiple, wild right hand strikes to the bag, nearly losing his balance. “Damnit…” Francis mutters, grabbing a hold of the bag, while he catches his breath. I can’t be you, but I’m trying. He gives the bag one more strike.

 

*POP*

 

“Twenty…”

[Above Average 0]

Oddly enough, I feel the need to explain this thing, which I normally don't do. It was supposed to help my writers block, which it hasn't and set-up the real promo I wanted to do, which it does, kinda. Ugh. And the subtitle's supposed to be 'Eighteen... Nineteen...'.

Edited September 11, 2003 by kelloggs

[Guest Goodear]

Comment you horses!

 

Anyway, its a nice "I'm young and already beaten up but I want to turn into (BLANK)" and provides a nice bit of foreshadowing for an angle down the road I would expect where that person comes into play. I really felt how tired Mak was here and I'm personally hoping he pulls it out and gets all cocky again while still being a face since we need those Anyways, I like it.

[Edwin MacPhisto 0]

Mak's obviously aspiring to be like MEEE!

 

I like that you addressed Mak's age. I often forget that he's one of the youngest competitors in the fed and it can be a crucial hook into his character. This feels good and I do believe it works as setup quite well.