Smartmarks Fake Baseball League

[Guest Evolution]

SFBL

June/July 5th, 2012

 

(NOTE: This recap not only covers the month of June, but the three gamedays in July leading up to the 2012 SFBL All-Star Break.)

 

Awards/SFBL Players In The News:

 

Giant Gonzales (ATL) will miss 10 weeks

 

ATLANTA - Atlanta's southpaw Giant Gonzales suffered a severe injury on Sunday and will be out for at least 10 weeks. In the 6th inning of the game against Columbus he experienced pain in his throwing arm and had to leave the game. Atlanta wasted no time and rushed him to a local Atlanta hospital. Team officials were informed later that Gonzales had suffered a pulled tricep muscle. This season Gonzales compiled an ERA of 4.29, going 7-2 in 14 starts. He fanned 62 while giving up 89 hits in 84 innings. He was 3rd in the North-South in wins!

 

Memphis' James wins Player of the Week Award

 

Edward James won the 3rd Player of the Week Award in his career for his performance during the week of June 4th. North-South pitchers couldn't figure out how to retire this guy all week long. Edward went 13 for 29 (.448), while hitting 1 home run and collecting 6 RBI. He got at least one hit each game this week and is currently on a 13 game hitting streak right now! James has hit for a .331 average this season. He has 37 extra base hits along with 160 total bases, resulting in a .630 slugging percentage. He's 10th in the North-South in batting, 2nd in homeruns and 6th in RBI!

 

DeSantis wins Player of the Week Award

 

For the 11th time in his career, Atlanta Hanoi Janes superstar Carlos DeSantis has won the Player of the Week Award. He hit .609 with 5 RBI and slugged a pristine 1.000 in 23 at bats.

 

East-West Standings

 

East

 

Team W L PCT GB

Baltimore 46 35 .568 -

Boston 41 40 .506 5.0

Philadelphia 41 40 .506 5.0

New Jersey 39 42 .481 7.0

New York 36 45 .444 10.0

 

West

 

Team W L PCT GB

Denver 46 35 .568 -

Phoenix 42 39 .519 4.0

Seattle 41 40 .506 5.0

Las Vegas 38 43 .469 8.0

Los Angeles 35 46 .432 11.0

 

North-South Standings

 

North

 

Team W L PCT GB

Columbus 47 34 .580 -

Detroit 40 41 .494 7.0

Indianapolis 39 42 .481 8.0

Chicago 33 48 .407 14.0

Vancouver 31 50 .383 16.0

 

South

 

Team W L PCT GB

Atlanta 48 33 .593 -

Jacksonville 47 34 .580 1.0

Charlotte 44 37 .543 4.0

Memphis 42 39 .519 6.0

Houston 34 47 .420 14.0

 

POWER RANKINGS:

(* denotes division leader)

 

RANK (Last Month) Team Points

1st (6th) Jacksonville 113

2nd (1st) Atlanta 109 *

3rd (2nd) Denver 105 *

4th (3rd) Columbus 103 *

5th (5th) Baltimore 100 *

6th (12th) Seattle 98

7th (7th) Charlotte 98

8th (15th) Indianapolis 96

9th (8th) Boston 95

10th (9th) Philadelphia 94

11th (4th) Memphis 94

12th (10th) Phoenix 91

13th (13th) Detroit 86

14th (11th) Las Vegas 84

15th (16th) New Jersey 80

16th (14th) New York 79

17th (17th) Houston 74

18th (20th) Chicago 71

19th (18th) Los Angeles 71

20th (19th) Vancouver 54

 

Injuries:

 

Sunday 6/10/2012 :

 

ATL: Giant Gonzales was injured while pitching.

Diagnosis: Pulled Tricep Muscle.

He is out for about 10 weeks.

 

Sunday 6/24/2012 :

 

VAN: Charlie Matthews was injured in a collision at home plate.

Diagnosis: Dislocated Shoulder.

He is out for about 5 weeks.

 

Monday 7/2/2012 :

 

LV: Marvin Jenkins was injured while pitching.

Diagnosis: Pulled Elbow Ligament.

He is out for about one week.

 

TSM Rankings:

 

Batters - Last Month:

 

1) Carlos DeSantis (.340, 10 HR, 22 RBI)

2) R.J. Frost (.333, 12 HR, 25 RBI)

3) Robert Henderson (.348, 8 HR, 24 RBI)

4) Shiro Suzuki (.360, 5 HR, 21 RBI)

5) David Hunter (.278, 4 HR, 22 RBI)

6) Logan Caldwell (.343, 4 HR, 18 RBI)

7) Joseph Corbin (.323, 3 HR, 15 RBI)

8) Edward James (.259, 3 HR, 18 RBI)

9) Winston Ghandi (.283, 2 HR, 8 RBI)

10) Charlie Matthews (.244, 4 HR, 10 RBI)

11) John Duran (.259, 2 HR, 10 RBI)

12) Patrick Hannon (.183, 3 HR, 14 RBI)

 

Batters - This Month:

 

1) Edward James (.308, 7 HR, 20 RBI)

2) Carlos DeSantis (.353, 5 HR, 17 RBI)

3) Robert Henderson (.292, 6 HR, 23 RBI)

4) Shiro Suzuki (.348, 2 HR, 14 RBI)

5) Winston Ghandi (.286, 5 HR, 18 RBI)

6) R.J. Frost (.241, 6 HR, 22 RBI)

7) David Hunter (.240, 4 HR, 6 RBI)

8) Patrick Hannon (.232, 4 HR, 19 RBI)

9) Logan Caldwell (.273, 2 HR, 16 RBI)

10) Joseph Corbin (.221, 3 HR, 10 RBI)

11) John Duran (.267, 2 HR, 15 RBI)

12) Charlie Matthes (.241, 0 HR, 3 RBI)

 

Batters - Overall:

 

1) Carlos DeSantis (.341, 19 HR, 72 RBI)

2) Edward James (.313, 21 HR, 58 RBI)

3) Robert Henderson (.345, 16 HR, 58 RBI)

4) Shiro Suzuki (.362, 12 HR, 59 RBI)

5) R.J. Frost (.300, 23 HR, 71 RBI)

6) David Hunter (.258, 9 HR, 36 RBI)

7) Winston Ghandi (.316, 11 HR, 45 RBI)

8) Logan Caldwell (.312, 9 HR, 48 RBI)

9) Joseph Corbin (.296, 8 HR, 40 RBI)

10) Patrick Hannon (.229, 14 HR, 48 RBI)

11) John Duran (.262, 8 HR, 35 RBI)

12) Charlie Matthews (.221, 6 HR, 21 RBI)

 

Starting Pitchers:

1) Eric LeBeau (3.45)

3) Marvin Jenkins (3.62)

2) Giant Gonzales (3.69)

4) Ben Dover (4.49)

 

Relievers:

1) The Berzerker (1.68)

2) Peter Kostka (4.66)

 

Notes: Kostka showed the greatest improvement among the pitchers this month, lowering his numbers almost three full points. Meanwhile, Rolf is turning more and more into a rock-solid closer with age, and Ben Dover and Marvin Jenkins are finally getting into the swing of things.

 

Giant Gonzales has 6-7 weeks remaining on his injury to his tricep muscle, which means that he is expected back in late August to early September, when the pressure will likely be on Atlanta to finally convert a South Division Championship--if they haven't been eliminated by the ultra tough division by that time.

 

All of the TSM batters experienced a June swoon, totally slacking off compared to earlier months, with Edward James, Carlos DeSantis, and Robert Henderson the only ones making significant contributions to their teams. Also, Charlie Matthews play in June leading up to his injury was ridiculously bad. (Matthews is expected to return behind the plate in early August, although it is doubtful that he will be the same.

 

Around The League

 

Highlights

 

It's a Harlot Swing...Ya'll

 

In the South, most were expecting it to come down to Memphis, Jacksonville, and Atlanta in the South going into the All-Star Break.

 

In mid-June, the Harlots decided that they wanted in on the fun too.

 

Behind the powerhouse pitching staff of Enoch Mylchreest, Modesto Lamb, C.J. Bulot (more on him later), and a cast of others, the Charlotte Harlots have climbed into 3rd place in the South, only four games behind Atlanta.

 

Starting on May 30th, Charlotte won an amazing ten games in a row, including a series sweep of the Jackoffs, before finally losing the first game of their series against the Memphis Eels. Charlotte then took the next two in their series against Memphis and even won their first game against Memphis before going on a disappointing 5-game skid, including a series sweep by not-so-good Houston. Charlotte remained a contender, however, and find themselves in a very good position going into the second half of the season.

 

In Search Of...Records

 

79 games in the books for Steve Hatfield, and "Sticky Hands" is looking to make history. With 87 RBIs at the break, he is in great position to shatter the record for the most RBIs in one season, set in 2003 when Randall Merz drove in an amazing 156 runs. At his current pace, Steve Hatfield would drive in 176 runs, absolutely shattering a long standing record. Not only that, but if Hatfield can improve his batting average over the next few months, he will be a serious contender for the Triple Crown.

 

Speaking of the Triple Crown, Eugene Widrick is the most likely to come close to such a feat. At .344 with 23 homeruns and 79 RBI, he is currently .012 batting average points out of 1st in that category, 1st in homeruns (tied with Steve Hatfield), and 2nd in RBI (behind Hatfield's 87). Widrick remains a consistent contributor to the Jackoffs, and is a serious threat for the Triple Crown should "Sticky Hands" falter in the second half.

 

Zoilo Castillo--who moved to Baltimore after being on the Jacksonville championship team last year--is on pace to beat Lyle Strutt's record for season batting average. At .375, Castillo is also a candidate for a batting average of .400, if he can go crazy at the plate.

 

Lowlights

 

LeBeau's Lost A Step

 

After his Rocket Wrist award winning performance last year, "Mr. Wonderful" Eric LeBeau hasn't returned to his 2011 form, finishing the first half of the season at 7-7. Considering that he finished 2011 with 8 losses total, he is certainly off his pace. It can be argued that Memphis and Charlotte establishing themselves as threats has thrown off the numbers of LeBeau, but it's hard to say what the second half will hold for Mr. LeBeau (who wasn't so wonderful in the first half.) Combined with the loss of his pitching teammate Giant Gonzales, LeBeau might have the pressure on him throught the final months of the season.

 

Besides, how many times can you break Atlanta's heart?

 

Edie's Wicked Wallop

 

Tracey Edie, a 25-year-old on the Memphis Eels, made one big move to continue a blowout of the Vancouver Vasectomy on June 24th.

 

Juan Reynosa threw a bullet to home plate to catch Edie--who was rounding third on his way home from second. The throw easily beat Edie, but Tracey, refusing to give up, gave it one last ditch effort to get across home plate and absolutely creamed Charlie Matthews, sending the Vancouver crowd into hysterics. The collision at home plate not only forced the ball out of Charlie Matthews for Memphis' 8th run in a absolute blowout, but it also dislocated the right shoulder of Charlie Matthews, putting him out for weeks.

 

It was smash-mouth baseball at its finest, but the real noise was made when Edie made no attempt to apologize for the dislocated shoulder of Matthews following the game. The vicious collision was simply referred to as a "freak accident" by Edie. The Memphis manager benched Edie for the next game against Vancouver, but put him in the rubber game of the series. He received a healthy round of boos when he came to the plate for his first at-bat as a replacement centerfielder, and quickly tripled down the left field line. His next at bat was a double down the left field line, and when Oscar Ortiz singled to left, Edie rounded third again and Reynosa threw home again to replacement catcher Michael Maley. Fortunately, the throw from Reynosa was off target and Edie scored without another confrontation.

 

The Games

 

Charlotte Harlot Heartbreak...and Redemption

June 12th, 2012

 

 

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 R H E

Memphis 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 3 0 0 0 3 2 1

Charlotte 0 0 0 1 0 1 1 0 0 0 0 1 4 7 0

 

Before the Tracey Edie incident had even happened, there was an amazing showdown between C.J. Bulot and Bocefus Longenbach, both well known for having abysmal seasons. However, Bulot would shine on this day, as he held a no-hitter, despite looking shaky with a few walks during 8 innings of work.

 

Going into the 9th inning, Bulot still looked like a strong candidate to score the first no-hitter in the SFBL since John Propes' gem in 2010. After getting Sergio Santana and Dante Rodriguez to fly out for a quick two outs, Charlotte fans were applauding Bulot and rooting him on as Edward James came to the plate...and was promptly walked. Robert Guarino...walked. With two outs and runners on first and second, Charlotte maintained a now endangered three-run lead. Sure enough, Esequiel Acosta became the party spoiler, taking Bulot yard for a 3-run homerun and breaking the hearts of the Harlots' fans who wanted to see this decidedly average pitcher pull out a no-hitter, no matter how dirty it was.

 

Henry Coleman stopped the bleeding of the Charlotte defense, but the game moved to extra innings nonetheless.

 

Neither team budged as the game crawled into its 4th hour and into the bottom of the 12th inning. The Charlotte fans, revitalized with the comeback of their team this year, stuck around as Augustus Gerst was on the mound against the leadoff hitter Moises Ramirez.

 

And with that, Ramirez, a career .249 hitter batting in the designated hitter position, stroked a leadoff, walkoff solo homerun to DEEEEEP center field, landing 435 feet later and redeeming a game that featured a lost no-hitter and yet also one of the most definitive endings.

 

The Game Just Keeps Going...And Going...And Going...And...

June 16th, 2012

 

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 R H E

Columbus 0 1 0 0 0 0 1 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 3 5 14 2

Detroit 0 0 0 1 0 1 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 1 3 12 1

 

The Junkyard in Detroit wasn't even half full.

 

But those that did arrive to the game got to see a near-six hour classic featuring a host of bullpen pitchers dueling it out and an offense on both sides that were unable to do much of anything.

 

The Detroit Motor Vehicles and the Columbus Pride are battling for first place in the North. And even though Columbus has a decided advantage over their division rivals, this game established that the two of them could go at any time and it'll be a classic.

 

After Harry Ducharme's RBI single in the top of the 7th to tie up the game for the Pride at 2-all, the fans in Detroit had no idea that no team would score again for nearly 3 hours.

 

For after that RBI single, nothing much of anything happened until the top of the 13th inning. With the game already running long and threatening to become one of the longest this season, Gilberto Alvarez singled to left with John Duffner on second base. Duffner rounded third and was told to head for home, but meeting him there was David Melendez, ball in hand. Duffner was easily tagged out as Gilberto moved to second, but the scoring opportunity had been wasted.

 

From there, the bullpen shut things down again on both sides until the top of the 17th. After a leadoff single from Elias Mijares, there were two outs with John Duffner coming to the plate. Already not having much of a day (like the rest of the batters), Duffner finally decided he would take a swing at a good pitch, and...hey, imagine that, it worked.

 

371 feet later, Columbus had a 4-2 lead, and some Detroit fans were even cheering that at least something was going on in the game. However, the cheers ended when Keith Batke nailed a solo homerun off Raymon Dunklee, making it back-to-back homeruns and giving Columbus a 5-2 lead.

 

In the bottom half of the inning, Robt Knudtson singled to center, scoring Emery Hamilton and making the score 5-3 Columbus. However, Logan Caldwell came up with the chance to score the game-winning run on a 3-run homerun, or at least score the game-tying run from first...instead he flied out to left-center.

 

Oh well.

[Lightning Flik 0]

HA~!

 

This Season:

James > Everyone

 

OH I CAME OUT TO PLAY THIS SEASON~!!! I GOT 21HRs BEFORE THE FUCKING ALL-STAR GAME~!!! WOOO~!!!

 

For info, that was like my total for one season if I remember correctly.

 

...if Memphis isn't contending or at least having a shot at getting in, I'm definitely seeing my ass getting traded at the deadline. Production like that, will be bought up.

 

Come on JAMES~! KEEP IT UP~!

[the pinjockey 0]

Certainly have a Brady Anderson WTF?!? season going here. I think James hit the cyber-juice this offseason.

[Lightning Flik 0]

Certainly have a Brady Anderson WTF?!? season going here.  I think James hit the cyber-juice this offseason.

 

I'll have you know that I was saying my prayers and taking my special enhanced and endorsed batch of wholesome vitamins.

 

Honest as Barry Bonds record in the HR department in the MLB is clean as a whistle.

[HarleyQuinn 0]

God damn, think I'm dying or what? Freakin' .258 so far in the season, ugh.

[Lightning Flik 0]

God damn, think I'm dying or what? Freakin' .258 so far in the season, ugh.

Yah, what's up with that? You aren't pulling up impressive numbers.

 

Then again, this is coming from the guy who was doing the same amount last season.

[Angel_Grace_Blue 0]

Damn it all to things and such! I gotta talk to Papa Shango, see if he can't work some of that voodoo that he do. So, I'm looking to my Jane teammates to send any small animals to be brutally slaughtered to speed up the recovery process, as well as help out Mr. LaBeau.

 

And we need to grow more mustaches and pompadours, people! I've got nothing else to say, really, except to laugh at Hunter. Good riddance, you silly man with your what have yous.

[Guest Evolution]

Fun with Eddy J's Homerun Total

 

With his 21st homerun of the season (a career high), Edward James now has 100 career homeruns. The 100th career homerun came off the arm of Justin Rodriguez in the 8th inning of a June 30th game against the Indianapolis Ignition.

 

All-Star Rosters

 

These players were selected for the EW OOTP-Allstar Team :

P Miguel Moldonado from Boston

P Georgie Stanback from Boston

P Nathan Thrush from Phoenix

P Doug Safwat from Philadelphia

P Trace Kessinger from Baltimore

P Juan Alvarez from Denver

P Raul Alvarado from New Jersey

P Emilio Carrasco from Philadelphia

P John Cosenza from Las Vegas

P Luciano Rovira from Philadelphia

C Brantley Suttster from Denver

C Rogerio Estrada from Baltimore

1B RJ Frost from Seattle (5th AS selection)

2B Brett Smith from Las Vegas

3B Shiro Suzuki from Phoenix (6th AS selection

SS Placido Olvera from New Jersey

LF Zoilo Castillo from Baltimore

CF Herbert Huber from New Jersey

RF Bill Anschitz from New Jersey

1B Brant Wrankmore from Baltimore

LF Abel Ortiz from Denver

LF Mike Scherbak from New Jersey

LF John Scherfenberg from Philadelphia

3B Matthew Welke from Baltimore

3B Raimundo Robledo from Boston

 

These players were selected for the NS OOTP-Allstar Team :

P Claudio Galaviz from Memphis

P Enoch Mylchreest from Charlotte

P George Alongi from Jacksonville

P Felix Rodas from Columbus

P Bocefus Longenbach from Memphis

P Tracy Charland from Indianapolis

P Modesto Lamb from Charlotte

P Phil Hanson from Atlanta

P Cedrick Fukusaburu from Jacksonville

P Chris Addington from Memphis

C Jc Morello from Houston

C John Duran from Charlotte (6th AS selection, first in 4 years)

1B Carlos DeSantis from Atlanta (7th AS selection)

2B Neall Isaacson from Columbus

3B Steve Hatfield from Atlanta

SS Winston Ghandi from Jacksonville (6th AS selection)

LF Robert Henderson from Columbus (4th AS selection)

CF Mike Cannington from Indianapolis

RF Balesio Varela from Columbus

1B Brandon Musselwhite from Houston

CF Jose Santillo from Atlanta

LF Josias Ramirez from Detroit

RF Robert Mendell from Vancouver

2B Eugene Widrick from Jacksonville

3B Edward James from Memphis (3rd AS selection)

 

Coming next...the midseason recap with GRADES~!

[Lightning Flik 0]

You don't know HOW much you had me going:

 

"I didn't make the All-Star Game? How the fuck did I not make the All-Star Game?! I'm the freaking Albert Pujols of this league, I ... oh, there I am."

 

You mean, sadistic bastard.

 

I liked that.

[HarleyQuinn 0]

My suckage is allowing for Frost to improve...yeah. In my mid-season, give me my OBP/SB's too so I don't feel THAT down

[Guest Evolution]

My suckage is allowing for Frost to improve...yeah. In my mid-season, give me my OBP/SB's too so I don't feel THAT down

Everyone has off years everyone once in a while.

 

I'm sure you'll be back to form next season, if you aren't already back to your old self in the second half.

[Angel_Grace_Blue 0]

Bah! Gonzales should have been selected! It's who the fans want to see, damn it! And they want to see Gonzales. And Honus Wagner. And Pol Pot. I say we give the fans what they want.

 

So, in other news, how goes the G-Man's recovery?

[KingPK 0]

Notes: Kostka showed the greatest improvement among the pitchers this month, lowering his numbers almost three full points.

 

And so my demotion to AAA occurs in 3....2....1

 

I do well, the Pride is in 1st. Coincidence?

[HarleyQuinn 0]

Off years? I'm pulling a freaking Pat Burrell...bah

[Guest Evolution]

2012 SFBL MIDSEASON RECAP

 

Welcome to the recap at the midseason mark of this season! Before we get into the actual season, let’s go over some things that happened in the preseason.

 

MIDSEASON AWARDS

 

MOST VALUABLE PLAYER (SFBL)

NEALL ISAACSON (COLUMBUS)

After being a Boston Tea Bagger for the beginning of his career, his recent move to Columbus has allowed him to put the Pride on the map, giving them a division lead in the North at the halfway point and showing no signs of letting it go anytime soon. Isaacson’s 22 homeruns, 68 RBI, combined with his 99 hits and 17 stolen bases, makes him one of the best all-around threats in the league.

Honorable Mention: Carlos DeSantis, Zoilo Castillo

 

MOST VALUABLE PLAYER (TSM)

CARLOS DESANTIS (ATLANTA)

Once again, DeSantis is bringing the goods for the Hanoi Janes, and this year it looks like it might not be for naught as they are hanging on to a South division lead and making it look good. DeSantis has an incredible 72 runs batted in, but in a plug for the Hanoi Janes themselves, he has also crossed the plate himself 74 times. DeSantis is on track for another Big Stick Award (which would be his fourth consecutive), and he’ll deserve it.

Honorable Mention: Edward James, Robert Henderson

 

MOST SURPRISING TEAM

BOSTON TEA BAGGERS

The surprise of the first half once again comes from the East Divison this year, as the Tea Baggers have come forward to become a playoff threat, only 5 games out of first from the Baltimore Crime Spree. At 41-40, their play isn’t very impressive, but hanging in there with Baltimore has to mean SOMETHING. And considering that they have the lowest payroll in the league, they certainly have come to play. I’ll cover them later and give you an idea of why this team is doing so good after being considered perennial losers for so long.

 

MOST DISAPPOINTING TEAM

VANCOUVER VASECTOMY

Pardon my language, but…what the fuck happened?

 

This is the team that almost beat Jacksonville in Game 7 of the North-South Conference Championship, minus Mark McLean, Iggy Dean and James Ellis (who they traded away, so what excuse do they have?) Free agency did not play with Vancouver’s heart, they HAVE a good team. What the hell are they doing at the bottom of the standings? I’ll try and figure that out later.

 

MIDSEASON GRADES

 

Atlanta Hanoi Janes: It’s the team that everyone loves to talk about, because everyone seems to want to figure out just how the Hanoi Janes will collapse. To Atlanta’s credit, however, they have hung on strong to a division lead that they established early in the season and have fought valiantly not to relinquish it. However, if the first half is any indication, the Hanoi Janes will likely be in serious trouble when the heat is on them from Memphis, Charlotte, and--of course--Jacksonville. Eric LeBeau, after a 20-win season with only 8 losses, now has 7 losses and is having trouble on the mound despite being supported by one of the best offenses in the league (473 runs scored, 1st among teams). With the injury of Giant Gonzales, the pitching staff is in desperate need of help, and one can only hope that with the upcoming trade deadline, the team with the 17th-ranked payroll will shell out some money and try to catch a big name pitcher in a trade. Lord knows they have the offense to sacrifice. This team needs HELP with the pitching if they are ever going to make it to the playoffs, let alone be able to maintain first for a good portion of the season. Consider this team’s goose cooked if they make no moves at the trading deadline. Offense be damned, the 14th-ranked team ERA is enough to call the Hanoi Janes the worst team in the South with the best record. Grade: C

 

Baltimore Crime Spree: Baltimore have made a lot of improvements and are looking like a credible contender should they make the playoffs. Signing Zoilo Castillo during the free agency period was a big part of this change, as the high-octane offense that brought the Crime Spree to glory is re-emerging. Five players on the team have 10 or more homeruns, and the team batting average of .274 is good enough for the 4th-best in the nation. The fans are behind the Crime Spree all the way, and they will follow the Crime Spree to every end to just see their team back in the playoffs. Francisco Vives remains a solid closer, and Trace Kessinger is gradually emerging as a rising star on the mound with a 9-4 record and a 4.14 ERA at the break. If the hitting remains strong, there is no reason why this team couldn’t advance to the SFBL Championship to take on the North-South champions. Grade: B

 

Boston Tea Baggers: Well, it’s not that Boston as a group is very excellent, but the fact that the stars on their squad are excellent more than makes up for the lack of team chemistry. For example: The pitching staff has a combined ERA of 4.57, only average among the other SFBL teams. However, Georgie “Flash” Stanback and Miguel Moldonado are putting together great seasons with an obvious lack of run support. 12-5 and 11-2 with ERAs of 2.47 and 1.97, respectively, these two pitchers make the rest of the staff look great, even if it obvious that they mostly suck. On the offensive side of things, and it will likely result in the reason that Boston will not be able to threaten Baltimore in the second half. Most of the offense comes from Steve Boyster and Raimundo Robledo, while the rest of the team is left swimming in mediocrity with a .257 team batting average and only 387 runs scored compared to 416 given up. Yes, this is an improved team from last year at this team, but they will not be able to even graze Baltimore in the race for the playoffs barring a miracle from Stanback and Moldonado. With the lowest payroll in the league, you figure that they should spend a little more money and improve themselves. Grade: D+

 

Charlotte Harlots: The Harlots were a very close second in the race for Most Surprising Team at the break, but the seeds had been planted for such a turnaround by Charlotte that all they needed was a small catalyst. The team has come together and they are now working together to climb up the ranks in the South Division. Only one player (Everette Orr) has more than 10 homeruns, and yet the team has 85 team homeruns. The impressive thing is that they are scoring the runs, finally. The pitching had always been good enough, now they have gotten the offense together with 420 runs scored, good enough for a 6th-best total in the league. As for the pitching…oh my, the pitching. Enoch Mylchreest (11-4, 3.15) and Modesto Lamb (3.74, 8-5) should be enough to convince you that this is one of the best pitching staffs in the South, let alone the conference. Wilson Delacruz, Juan Easterling, and strikeout extraordinaire Jayce Ross round out an excellent pitching staff that will wreak havoc on anyone in the playoffs should Charlotte make it that far. This is a solid, solid team. There are no breakout stars on the offense, but the fact is that Charlotte doesn’t really need them if they can continue this offensive production and perhaps pick up some more hits along the way. Grade: B-

 

Chicago Transit Authority: Despite some off-season moves, this team hasn’t improved very much. The offense is showing some signs of moving its way up, with the acquisition of Cody Stormes. Meanwhile, Samuel Sainz can prove he can still swing the bat, and Anton Gonzalez is shaping up to be one of the best prospects Chicago has ever seen. However, this is the North Division, so the pitching staff is naturally atrocious. Daniel Estill is nowhere near the pitcher he used to be, and it’s fortunate that Chicago has a stable enough bullpen to bail out the rotten pitchers. There’s not much more that can be said. They aren’t in last place, but the last place team isn’t so good, either. The offensive improvements are showing that they’re at least trying. Grade: D-

 

Columbus Pride: After a rather disappointing 2011, the Pride are back and are sitting pretty at the top of the North Division with a comfortable lead over the second place Detroit Motor Vehicles. Neall Isaacson was a huge pickup in the offseason, and improved an offense that already wasn’t too bad. Robert Henderson and Gilberto Alvarez are also making significant contributions to the 47-34 team with the highest payroll in baseball. Yes, this is the North Division, but the key to Columbus is that their pitching staff is merely mediocre, and not awful like the other teams below them in the official standings. Felix Rodas remains a very solid starting pitcher and will likely be essential in keeping the pitching staff going in the second half, as the rest of them are merely mediocre compared to the very well paid Honduras native. Columbus has paid a lot of money, and it’s starting to work out for them. Whoever wins in the South will have a tough time getting past the Pride. Grade: B-

 

Denver Douchebags: Denver hasn’t been getting much press lately, and for good reason: There isn’t a whole lot of competition in the West, and many preseason predictions had Denver taking the West anyway. But they’re still worth looking at, being a team with the fifth-fattest payroll in the league, after all. The truth is that they have lost the same offensive punch that got them into the 2011 SFBL Championship. Abel Ortiz remains a key part of the offense, but his supporting players in David Zullo, Ryan Marcus and Luis Amezcua aren’t quite as productive as they have been in the past. Of course, Denver finds a way to make up with this with a mighty fine pitching staff. Jayme Hermann and Juan Alvarez remain solid on the mound and Jed Doria and prospect Harry McKern are valuable additions to the pitching staff. King Caffee doesn’t quite have the same amount of saves as the rest of the closers, but he’s just as good as any of them, no matter what his postseason in 2011 was like. All in all, Denver isn’t really getting covered much, but they should because they’ll spell trouble for whoever is in the North once again this year, even though their offense is lacking its punch. Grade: B-

 

Detroit Motor Vehicles: Detroit is the worst team in 2nd place. It’s a miracle that they’ve even gotten this far, but they have. Most of this can be attributed to the team’s .273 team batting average, good enough for 5th among the 20 SFBL teams. That’s all that’s going for their offense, however: 65 team homeruns (last), 194 walks (next-to-last) and only 361 runs scored (second-to-last). The DMV are great at home, but away from the Junkyard, they are stymied quite often, a problem that will certainly arise in the second half. The pitching is somewhat better with John Propes at the helm. Geordie Cavell remains a solid closer, but the rest is simply there and won’t be enough to catch up with the Pride. Expect them to be distanced from the leader of the pack. The team simply needs work. Grade: D+

 

Houston Horny Toads: Houston certainly isn’t the most disappointing team anymore. We’ve come to expect this from the Horny Toads. However, Houston is at least trying to make some progress, no matter how much they are brutally failing. A good start is leading the league in homeruns with 108 of them, converting that into 394 runs scored, which is good enough for 11th-best in the league. Problems with the team arise when you talk about their issue with drawing walks. If they don’t get the bat on the ball (and their .264 team batting average means that they usually don’t), they’re striking out. The Horny Toads have no patience, and that is why they are the only team in the South who has no realistic chance of threatening Memphis, Atlanta, Jacksonville or Charlotte, no matter who finishes first in that division. Still, J.C. Morello, Brandon Musselwhite, and prospect Patrick Hannon should be recognized for their contributions. When it comes to the pitching staff, however, there are no contributions to be giving thanks for. Andres Cifuentes is the only standout among the bunch here, and the rest are just brought down by an obvious lack of run support. You know what? I’m tired of talking about this team. They’re trying, but they’re failing. They also happen to have one of the older teams when it comes to average age. Perhaps it’s time to catch up with the rest of us? Grade: F

 

Indianapolis Ignition: One of the best offenses countered by one of the worst pitching efforts. That’s a rather good way to sum up the Ignition this year. Mike Cannington, Ben Cruz, and SUPER HOT prospect “Candyman” Mark Arias are making a huge splash on the scene, previously unknown but now leading an offense that is capable of winning championships on the mere merit that they can put the bat on the ball. Their .275 team batting average is 3rd best, and they scored 430 runs in the first half of the season and will score 430 more runs with ease, no doubt.

 

Now let’s talk about the pitching. Tracy Charland is still a beast on the mound. At 9-4 with a 3.80 ERA, he’s taking that run support and using it to his advantage. In fact, with a dERA (defense independent Earned Run Average) of 3.23, Charland is proving that he’s getting a nice cut of his work done by himself, but the defense is helping. Yogi Hisashi still has the good stuff, and he can strike out batters by the ton, but he’s also giving up too many homeruns to make an effect. Even with all the run support money can by, it’s hard to come back from crushing homeruns off Yogi. The Ignition are shaking things up a little bit with their pitching, which is a sign that they want to change. For now, however, they have a flawed rotation and a bullpen that just won’t hold up to continued pressure from some of the bigger and badder teams in the North-South conference. However, with an offense like that, it’s easy to pin this team as slightly above average. Grade: C+

 

Jacksonville Jackoffs: Atlanta fans, listen up:

 

THE JACKOFFS ARE BEGINNING TO FALL APART.

 

That’s right, the team which has dominated the South Division with an iron fist was absolutely brutalized by free agency this year. They still remain the 7th-highest team in terms of payroll, but players like Zoilo Castillo, Luciano Cardona, Andre Faretta, and Clinton Kelly have gone the way of the Dodo and are now in what they believe to be greener pastures. Fortunately for Jacksonville, their stellar pitching staff ensures that they at least have a chance to make it to the playoffs if they’re not going to three-peat as SFBL Champions.

 

So, who’s left after the scouring of the offense? Eugene Widrick, for one, and he’s a big contributor to the remnants of this Jacksonville offense. With 23 homeruns and 79 RBI at the break, he’s looking for a Big Stick award to go with the two rings on his finger, and he’ll also be a candidate for the Triple Crown in the later months. Winston Ghandi, who will likely be Jacksonville 4 Life, is putting up respectable numbers and will likely have a late season surge to bring his RBI total over 100 and hopefully maintain a nice average around .300. However, the remainder of the offense that didn’t become free agents aren’t doing so hot this season. For that reason, Jacksonville has scored a measly 379 runs, good enough for a tie for 15th among the 20 SFBL teams.

 

Thank God for that pitching staff, eh? George Alongi, Ronnie Galeana, Joey Salvador and--of course--Cedrick Fukusaburu. All of them are all-star caliber, and all of them are playing like it, too. The team ERA of 3.49, 183 allowed walks, and the 303 total runs allowed are all stats that the Jackoffs lead, and 78 homeruns allowed allows the lack of run support to still be enough. And that’s why the Jackoffs are only one game behind the Hanoi Janes. In an offensive shootout, “Sticky Hands” and DeSantis will absolutely destroy Jacksonville, there is no disputing this. However, when it comes down to a pitching duel, the Fab Four of Alongi, Galeana, Salvador and Fukusaburu will dominate. And for that reason, I can’t give Jacksonville anything lower than a B-. Yes, they were hit hard by free agency, but…damn, that pitching staff is HOT. Grade: B-

 

Las Vegas Jokers: The Jokers have always been known for their pitching staff, and this hand is no different. John Cosenza, once considered a set-up man or middle reliever has now become the team’s official closer, converting 20 saves. Marvin Jenkins is doing just fine despite his injury close to the end of the first half. Jose Paniagua can also pitch when he wants to deliver. All in all, it’s not quite as good as the royal flush that they used to have, but Las Vegas are only 8 games behind Denver because of this pitching staff (especially the bullpen).

 

The offense, however, is not so hot. Wilford Linn and Brett Smith are leading the charge, and as good as they are, they can only bat once in the batting order, which is a shame because most of the other offensive units on this squad are just downright awful. Brett Smith can’t be happy that he’s a contender for the Big Stick Award and yet left to wallow in the depths of the West Division, but such is life. Grade: C-

 

Los Angeles Glory Holes: Let’s just skip over the offense, because it’s not much to talk about, and this is a last place team. Meanwhile, on the pitching side of things, Ben Dover is actually having a good season for a change, finishing with a 7-4 record at the All-Star Break. However, most of this is because of the defense and the run support (which is surprising since it’s almost non-existent for the other pitchers). James Ellis (who came over in a trade) is a much better all-around pitcher than Dover, although he is getting rather old and likely won’t be going anywhere anytime soon--his career is likely finishing with the Glory Holes. Anyway, nothing much to say about the offense, and the pitching isn’t much of a great thing either. Grade: D

 

Memphis Eels: Whoo, doggies. Memphis has the 2nd-biggest payroll in the SFBL, and it has sure paid off for them. The batting still isn’t much to talk about except for the emergence of Edward James as a surprisingly good power hitter, with 21 homeruns at the All-Star Break and a selection to the All-Star Game to show for it, only the third in a career that will likely see him going to a handful more of the games. Sergio Santana can still hit it out of the park at the age of thirty-six, but he’s mostly swinging and missing these days. Oscar Ortiz is having problems with injuries, but remains solid, along with Robert Guarino. Together they are putting together a respectable offense that scored 415 runs in the first half, which is certainly not bad at all.

 

Oh, it’s the pitching that is carrying Memphis to 4th place and 6 games behind the Hanoi Janes. Claudio Galaviz is at 12-2 with a 1.97 ERA, getting some considerable help from the defensive side of things to keep that ERA at a minimum. It looks like Galaviz is going for another Rocket Wrist, and at this pace, he should take it easily. Australian William Tienhaara is looking good with the run support behind him, and Bocefus Longenbach is having the season of his career, 9-4 at the break with a 3.33 ERA. This is a very good team, and they just have some problems remaining consistent, which might kill them in the end or it might not be enough to keep them out of the tight spot. They’re in fourth place, but they’re certainly not out of this yet. Grade: B-

 

New Jersey Clerks: The total and complete lack of pitching will kill the Clerks this year. Only seven games out of first, but they will likely not be able to catch up with the Crime Spree, and even if they get close, hell, even if they get to the playoffs, they simply will not survive. 106 team homeruns is an impressive stat, but Trent Morphy--who leads the team in homeruns--only has 59 RBI to show for it, which isn’t nearly enough for what the Clerks would need to counter such a bad pitching staff. Not even their 440 runs scored, which is good enough for 4th-best was enough.

 

So, what’s so bad about the pitching staff? 5.33 team ERA (worst), 326 walks (worst), and 447 runs allowed. The pitching for New Jersey has actually found a way to be worse than the offense, which, all things considered, is just fine. Until improvements are made, I’ll refuse to even recognize some of the pitchers on this squad. Grade: D+

 

New York Bums: What I said last year at this time really does still apply, as this team is just awful, awful, awful. No offense to speak of, and to think that they’re only 10 games out of first place is some kind of miracle, and it says a lot for just how the difficulty is in the East-West. Cedric Rojas is a good enough pitcher, but we all know that he struggles in the postseason anyway, and he’s not doing that great on this team anyway. The bullpen also brings this team down and…ugh. It’s hard to write recaps about teams this bad. Grade: F

 

Philadelphia Freedom: This team would be good if they could get the bat on the ball. Otherwise, the offense is great. Basic fundamentals escape players like Cristian Vasquez and Jed Goude, however, and the rest of the team is really suffering because of it. Now for the pitching. Doug Safwat is a fine young man, and at 27 years old, promises to have a good career whether or not he remains with the Philadelphia Freedom. His 10-6 record is no fluke. He will likely be the future of SFBL pitching once he reaches his peak. Otherwise, I’m beginning to get burnt out on these subpar teams. Grade: C-

 

Phoenix Ashes: Yeah, it’s another one of those teams. Offense is no good, and it hasn’t been for quite some time. Their ability to steal bases is fine and good, but Shiro Suzuki can take this team only so far. Nathan Thrush is still a beast on the mound at 37 years old, and will likely continue to be until the day he retires (which, of course, isn’t that far away). However. Ugh. Grade: D

 

Seattle Frasiers: R.J. Frost is back to his old self with 23 homeruns at the break, and the rest of the team is just kinda lingering there, unable to score more runs than the pitching staff can allow. Juan Pearson is all kinds of washed up, and it wouldn’t be bold to consider his career over by next year, even though most of his bloated ERA comes from a lack of defense, not a lack of run support. Burnout. BURNOUT. Grade: C

 

Vancouver Vasectomy: What a bunch of disappointment. Shimetarou Naoki refuses to actually, you know, hit the ball more than what he’s hit out of the park, and Robert Mendell is slowly beginning to lose his punch. Ralph Mitchell still has the stuff, but Tito Aquino is another one of those pitchers who might as well stick a fork in themselves and consider themselves done. W00t. Finished. Grade: D-

 

Gee. Can you tell that I was a little tired of doing these recaps by the end of the 20 teams? I’m never doing this again. Little blurbs = good. Novels = bad.

 

PREDICTIONS

 

END-OF-SEASON STANDINGS

 

EAST

 

1) Baltimore

2) Boston

3) Philadelphia

4) New Jersey

5) New York

 

No change. East is pretty boring.

 

WEST

 

1) Denver

2) Seattle

3) Phoenix

4) Las Vegas

5) Los Angeles

 

Once again, not much is going on here except I think that Seattle will be able to make it interesting for the Denver Douchebags.

 

NORTH

 

1) Columbus

2) Indianapolis

3) Detroit

4) Chicago

5) Vancouver

 

Detroit will fizzle down to third and Indianapolis could make a late-season surge to threaten the hot Pride. Who cares about the bottom two?

 

SOUTH

 

1) Charlotte

2) Atlanta

3) Memphis

4) Jacksonville

5) Houston

 

It pains me to say this, but I don’t think Jacksonville will be that close in the second half. The pitching staff can’t rumble on forever, and the offense will run out of steam, allowing for the other improving teams to capitalize. However, I can’t predict Atlanta to take a South Division title in good faith.

 

Man, that midseason recap hurt.

 

A list of things that are upcoming:

 

1) All-Star Game Preview/Recap

2) TSM Career Leaderboards (No, seriously)

3) Favorite Toy Predicts "Who's Going To Break 500 Homeruns First?"

4) July Recap (TSM Rankings, Power Rankings, Trade Analyses, And A Special Video Package On Giant Gonzales' Recovery [That Last One Is A Lie])

 

EDIT: THE JACKOFFS ARE BEGIN TO FALL APART. SOMEONE SET US UP THE BOMB. My grammar error has been fixed.

[the pinjockey 0]

I would guess Robert Henderson (heir to the Big Stick Award throne) reaches 500 first. I didn't start my career until age 21 and it took a few years to get the power spike going. If the people age well I have a shot in 5 or 6 years. But Henderson already has 103 HRs under his belt in 4 seasons and is just now 21. He has a good 13-15 season left and he just needs to average 27-30 HRs.

[Guest Smell the ratings!!!]

JACKSONVILLE ARE TO FALLING APART

 

pffffft. I'd think we all have this figured out by now. Pitching = Win. Jacksonville = Pitching. easy.

[Lightning Flik 0]

...I have the best season I can possibly buy, and it probably won't be enough to get my Memphis Eels to the playoffs...

 

I wanna cry really hard now...

[Angel_Grace_Blue 0]

Why must you toy with my emotions, tempting a Gonzales video package? But, I'm hoping that the G-Unit (Hey, think of a better nickname, you know, aside from the one I gave him, 'Beanball') will return to similar form he had last season, not his start of career form, where he sucked a lot (Not more than Crow, but too much for my liking).

 

Once again Janes, let's try to get those mustaches and pompadours growing in nice and thick. And whatnot.

[MarvinisaLunatic 0]

Marvin Jenkins pitches well and theres no offense..

 

Blah.

[Guest Evolution]

Which All-Star Roster is More "Stacked"?

 

According to the formulas that I use for the TSM Rankings, here's a breakdown of just how good each All-Star Team is.

 

Hitting (Higher is Better)

North-South All-Stars - 9.45

East-West All-Stars - 7.86

 

Pitching (Lower is Better)

North-South All-Stars - 33.31

East-West All-Stars - 34.89

 

Overall

North-South All-Stars - 42.76

East-West All-Stars - 42.75

 

As you can see, the North-South has a huge advantage in hitting, but the pitching will be pretty even. This might actually be a pretty good All-Star Game, eh?

 

Starting Lineups for 2012 SFBL All-Star Game:

 

East-West

 

1. John Scherfenberg (Leftfield)

2. Shiro Suzuki (Third Base)

3. Abel Ortiz (Designated Hitter)

4. RJ Frost (First Base)

5. Herbert Huber (Centerfield)

6. Brett Smith (Second Base)

7. Bill Anschitz (Rightfield)

8. Placido Olvera (Shortstop)

9. Brantley Suttster (Catcher)

 

On The Mound: Nathan Thrush

 

North-South

 

1. Eugene Widrick (Third Base)

2. Winston Ghandi (Shortstop)

3. Carlos DeSantis (First Base)

4. J.C. Morello (Catcher)

5. Robert Henderson (Leftfield)

6. Neall Isaacson (Second Base)

7. Mike Cannington (Centerfield)

8. Steve Hatfield (Designated Hitter)

9. Balesio Varela (Rightfield)

 

On The Mound: Claudio Galaviz

[Guest Evolution]

2012 SFBL All-Star Game Recap

 

Zoilo Castillo, RJ Frost and Abel Ortiz all hit homeruns for the East-West All-Stars as they hung on to defeat the North-South 6-4.

 

Ortiz' homerun came in the top of the 7th and helped the East-West keep a padded lead over the North-South, who never lead at any point in the game.

 

RJ Frost's only hit came on that 2-run homerun in the first inning, as he was replaced in his 4th at bat by Mike Scherbak. Shiro Suzuki went 1-for-3.

 

For the North-South, Edward James' pinch-hit at-bat was for naught as he finished 0-for-1. Winston Ghandi went 1-for-4, while Carlos DeSantis went 2-for-3 while scoring once. Robert Henderson finished 0-for-3, in what was an overall disappointing game for the offense-driven North-South.

 

TSM Career Leaderboards

 

...Uh...the batters are done. I'll be done with the pitching tomorrow.

 

Favorite Toy Predictions

 

So, when are you going to break that special milestone? By implementing a Favorite Toy stat, help can provided in determining will someone will break that special stat, whether it be 3,000 hits or 500 homeruns.

 

Favorite Toy FAQ:

 

Why is my percent chance so low?

There are two factors that work together to lower your percentage: age and lack of the stat in question. For example, John Duran has a 53.6% chance of getting the 1,686 hits that he needs to break the 3,000 mark. This is dually because he is 27 and is also averaging around 116 hits per season. Given how many years he has left in his career (more or less), the outlook is rather bleak for him reaching that mark.

 

Why am I not on these lists?

Patrick Hannon and Joseph Corbin are not on these lists because they have not completed three full seasons of work in the SFBL. You must accomplish this before any Favorite Toy calculations can be made.

 

Starting off simple:

 

3,000 Hits

--A mark only twenty-five players in Major League Baseball have ever reached. So, who has the best chance of reaching the plateau from the TSM players?

 

Name (% Chance)

Robert Henderson (110.3%)

Carlos deSantis (105.5%)

Shiro Suzuki (104.1%)

Winston Ghandi (83.5%)

Logan Caldwell (79.8%)

Edward James (78.0%)

David Hunter (74.8%)

Charlie Matthews (67.9%)

RJ Frost (66.0%)

John Duran (53.6%)

 

Carlos had the right idea in talking about the 500 homerun talk. Robert Henderson is a very young player and yet at the age of 22 already has 936 career hits. So he has the highest chance of breaking 3,000, but Carlos DeSantis and Shiro Suzuki will likely beat him to that mark.

 

4,257 Hits

--The mark set by everyone's favorite Cincinnati Red Pete Rose. Obviously, no one has been able to top this...will any of the SFBL boys be able to break it?

 

Name (% Chance)

Robert Henderson (68.6%)

Carlos deSantis (52.1%)

Shiro Suzuki (50.0%)

Winston Ghandi (47.9%)

Edward James (47.9%)

Logan Caldwell (47.0%)

Charlie Matthews (45.3%)

David Hunter (44.3%)

RJ Frost (35.8%)

John Duran (30.7%)

 

As you can see here, age becomes a factor for some of the players. But the mark is so astronomical that it will be hard for even the most consistent and young hitters like Robert Henderson to make such a mark. This is a stat to keep an eye on in the future.

 

500 Homeruns

--19 MLB players have done it, how many first generation TSM players will pull off the feat?

 

Name (% Chance)

Carlos deSantis (116.0%)

RJ Frost (86.6%)

Robert Henderson (84.1%)

Logan Caldwell (67.8%)

Charlie Matthews (52.6%)

Shiro Suzuki (49.7%)

David Hunter (43.3%)

John Duran (37.7%)

Winston Ghandi (33.7%)

Edward James (31.2%)

 

Pretty interesting stuff here. deSantis is pretty much a lock for this, needing only 209 more homeruns in his career and being projected to hit 236 more in his career. Frost could also break this mark, but only if he can keep his homerun total up and not slump from 50 to 28 like he did from 2010 to 2011. And of course, Henderson is also up there, simply because he's young and hitting a healthy amount of homeruns. Then the numbers drop off from there, as even some youngins in the field don't have much of a chance of hitting this mark (it'll take a few more 20 homerun first halves for Edward James to get close).

 

756 Homeruns

--Shit, like I even need to mention this. Let's see who'll beat Hammerin' Hank.

 

Name (% Chance)

Carlos deSantis (51.7%)

Robert Henderson (50.3%)

RJ Frost (42.4%)

Logan Caldwell (38.0%)

Charlie Matthews (33.3%)

Shiro Suzuki (26.8%)

David Hunter (25.1%)

John Duran (21.1%)

Winston Ghandi (19.9%)

Edward James (19.0%)

 

You would think the younger Henderson would have a higher chance to beat this record. Nope, it's deSantis again, but once again the number is awfully high and deSantis admittedly got off to a late start in his career (though what a start it was), and it'll be interesting to see if anyone can even scrape the surface here.

 

I'll bring back the Favorite Toy for future installments, including stuff with pitchers. But hey, let's get back to the action already, eh?

 

July recap is coming up next.

[Guest Evolution]

SFBL

Post All-Star July 2012

 

Awards/SFBL Players In The News:

 

Frost wins Player of the Week Award

 

Seattle first baseman RJ Frost has won the Player of the Week Award for the 8th time in his career! RJ pounded opposing pitchers, hitting .400 with 4 HR and 9 RBI while slugging .833. He got at least one hit each game this week and is now on a 7 game hitting streak. Frost has hit 29 taters this year while batting .302. He adds 13 doubles, along with 63 runs scored. He's 9th in the East-West in batting average, 1st in homeruns and 1st in RBI!

 

Frost wins Batter of the Month Award

 

RJ Frost of Seattle wins his 5th Batter of the Month award for putting up the best numbers in the East-West. RJ was on fire, hitting .330 with 10 homeruns and 25 RBI. Frost has hit 32 homeruns this year while batting .304. He adds 16 doubles, along with 73 runs scored. He's 8th in the East-West in batting average, 1st in homeruns and 1st in RBI!

 

Jenkins receives Pitcher of the Month award

 

Marvin Jenkins pitched like a legend in July, and the East-West named him Pitcher of the Month for his extraordinary performance. He had an ERA of just 1.13 in 32 innings of work in which he struck out 28 hitters. His record in July is 4-0. Opposing players hit .249 against Matvin this season. While posting an ERA of 3.31 he went 12-6 in 21 starts, fanning 109 and walking 43 hitters. He's 5th in the East-West in ERA and 4th in wins!

 

East-West Standings

 

East

 

Team W L PCT GB

Baltimore 56 46 .549 -

Philadelphia 54 48 .529 2.0

Boston 53 49 .520 3.0

New Jersey 49 53 .480 7.0

New York 48 54 .471 8.0

 

West

 

Team W L PCT GB

Denver 59 43 .578 -

Phoenix 53 49 .520 6.0

Seattle 50 52 .490 9.0

Las Vegas 49 53 .480 10.0

Los Angeles 39 63 .382 20.0

 

North-South Standings

 

North

 

Team W L PCT GB

Columbus 60 42 .588 -

Indianapolis 52 50 .510 8.0

Detroit 51 51 .500 9.0

Chicago 43 59 .422 17.0

Vancouver 43 59 .422 17.0

 

South

 

Team W L PCT GB

Memphis 56 46 .549 -

Atlanta 55 47 .539 1.0

Jacksonville 54 48 .529 2.0

Charlotte 52 50 .510 4.0

Houston 44 58 .431 12.0

 

POWER RANKINGS:

(* denotes division leader)

 

RANK (Last Month) Team Points

1st (3rd) Denver 112 *

2nd (4th) Columbus 110 *

3rd (11th) Memphis 104 *

4th (10th) Philadelphia 102

5th (9th) Boston 96

6th (5th) Baltimore 96 *

7th (8th) Indianapolis 96

8th (2nd) Atlanta 92

9th (1st) Jacksonville 89

10th (7th) Charlotte 89

11th (16th) New York 89

12th (12th) Phoenix 88

13th (6th) Seattle 85

14th (14th) Las Vegas 85

15th (13th) Detroit 85

16th (18th) Chicago 79

17th (15th) New Jersey 79

18th (17th) Houston 78

19th (20th) Vancouver 78

20th (19th) Los Angeles 66

 

Injuries:

 

Sunday 7/22/2012 :

 

HOU: Patrick Hannon was injured while throwing a ball.

Diagnosis: Stiff Shoulder.

He is day-to-day, but full recovery will take one week.

 

TRADING DEADLINE

 

The following trades were made before the deadline:

 

Friday 7/13/2012 :

 

Trade between Jacksonville and Houston :

Houston gets :

P Joey Salvador (3.48 dERA)

RF Nakaga Hidehira (Prospect)

 

Jacksonville gets :

P Theodore Ellingsworth (

 

Advantage: Houston. They get the pitching staff they so desperately need, and Jacksonville...gets a closer to replace Fukusaburu?

 

Trade between Philadelphia and Vancouver :

Vancouver gets :

P Emilio Carrasco

P Tyler Laborde

Philadelphia gets :

C Charlie Matthews

 

Well, Philly needs a good starting catcher, and Vancouver was all too eager to get Grappler to switch leagues so he wouldn't have a run in with Tracey Edie.

 

TSM Rankings:

 

Batters - Last Month:

 

1) Edward James (.308, 7 HR, 20 RBI)

2) Carlos DeSantis (.353, 5 HR, 17 RBI)

3) Robert Henderson (.292, 6 HR, 23 RBI)

4) Shiro Suzuki (.348, 2 HR, 14 RBI)

5) Winston Ghandi (.286, 5 HR, 18 RBI)

6) R.J. Frost (.241, 6 HR, 22 RBI)

7) David Hunter (.240, 4 HR, 6 RBI)

8) Patrick Hannon (.232, 4 HR, 19 RBI)

9) Logan Caldwell (.273, 2 HR, 16 RBI)

10) Joseph Corbin (.221, 3 HR, 10 RBI)

11) John Duran (.267, 2 HR, 15 RBI)

12) Charlie Matthes (.241, 0 HR, 3 RBI)

 

Batters - This Month:

 

1) Robert Henderson (.419, 6 HR, 27 RBI)

2) R.J. Frost (.330, 10 HR, 25 RBI)

3) Carlos DeSantis (.409, 7 HR, 19 RBI)

4) Edward James (.344, 4 HR, 18 RBI)

5) Winston Ghandi (.326, 5 HR, 11 RBI)

6) Logan Caldwell (.294, 4 HR, 17 RBI)

7) Shiro Suzuki (.362, 2 HR, 11 RBI)

8) Joseph Corbin (.241, 6 HR, 16 RBI)

9) Patrick Hannon (.242, 4 HR, 10 RBI)

10) David Hunter (.188, 2 HR, 11 RBI)

11) John Duran (.222, 2 HR, 3 RBI)

12) Charlie Matthews (Did Not Play)

 

Batters - Overall:

 

1) Carlos DeSantis (.356, 26 HR, 91 RBI)

2) Robert Henderson (.358, 22 HR, 85 RBI)

3) Edward James (.319, 25 HR, 76 RBI)

4) R.J. Frost (.305, 33 HR, 96 RBI)

5) Shiro Suzuki (.361, 14 HR, 70 RBI)

6) Winston Ghandi (.300, 16 HR, 56 RBI)

7) Logan Caldwell (.306, 13 HR, 65 RBI)

8) Joseph Corbin (.282, 14 HR, 56 RBI)

9) David Hunter (.244, 11 HR, 47 RBI)

10) Patrick Hannon (.231, 18 HR, 58 RBI)

11) John Duran (.255, 10 HR, 38 RBI)

12) Charlie Matthews (.220, 6 HR, 21 RBI)

 

Starting Pitchers:

1) Marvin Jenkins (3.24)

2) Eric LeBeau (3.48)

3) Ben Dover (3.96)

4) Giant Gonzales (Did Not Play)

 

Relievers:

1) The Berzerker (1.53)

2) Peter Kostka (3.77)

 

Notes: PK was right on the money, as Kostka was moved down to AAA during the month of July and has yet to be called back up as of yet (though he'll definitely be around for the September run)

 

Everyone had a pretty good July except for Charlie Matthews, who didn't play. Edward James continues to prove that this season is going to be a big one for him, as he looks to be aiming for 35-40 homeruns by the end of the season!

 

Meanwhile, deSantis is still good, though Memphis is #1 in the league.

 

Update on Giant Gonzales: 2-3 weeks remaining with the injury, should be back in time for the home stretch.

 

Contract extensions

There's no guarantee as to how good Giant Gonzales will be when he returns from his injury, but the Atlanta Hanoi Janes are willing to take that risk as they have resigned Giant to a 3 year contract extension worth 6.118 million dollars per year.

 

Marvin Jenkins is in his prime and would like to test the market (a good move on his part), and Edward James and Rolf Dreikugeln feel the same way.

 

So. Should be a pretty interesting free agency period.

[HarleyQuinn 0]

*just stares at his numbers*...how the hell did I manage to get 11 RBI's while hitting fucking .188? Jeez, maybe going FA wasn't the hottest idea.

[KingPK 0]

Notes: PK was right on the money, as Kostka was moved down to AAA during the month of July and has yet to be called back up as of yet (though he'll definitely be around for the September run)

I swear, it's like someone in the front office is screwing around with me. "Oh, that kid dropped his ERA another point? Dammit, we wanted him to go down a half point more! Send him down!!!"

[MarvinisaLunatic 0]

Jenkins receives Pitcher of the Month award

 

Marvin Jenkins pitched like a legend in July, and the East-West named him Pitcher of the Month for his extraordinary performance. He had an ERA of just 1.13 in 32 innings of work in which he struck out 28 hitters. His record in July is 4-0. Opposing players hit .249 against Matvin this season. While posting an ERA of 3.31 he went 12-6 in 21 starts, fanning 109 and walking 43 hitters. He's 5th in the East-West in ERA and 4th in wins!

 

Starting Pitchers:

1) Marvin Jenkins (3.24)

2) Eric LeBeau (3.48)

3) Ben Dover (3.96)

4) Giant Gonzales (Did Not Play)

 

Marvin Jenkins is in his prime and would like to test the market (a good move on his part), and Edward James and Rolf Dreikugeln feel the same way.

Yes! Marvin Jenkins might get out of Las Vegas!

[Angel_Grace_Blue 0]

No! We need Rolf in Hotlanta! I didn't just say "Hotlanta" did I? Anyway, we need him back here. As well as Marvin, for our pitching suckith.

 

It'd be damn "funny" if we traded DeSantis away and suddenly took a Jacksonville-like grip on the division. Turned out our best player was holding the team down. It would never happen, but it would be interesting. To a person with severe brain injuries. Like me.

[the pinjockey 0]

The Ewing/Bledsoe Theory.

[Lightning Flik 0]

South

 

Team W L PCT GB

Memphis 56 46 .549 -

Atlanta 55 47 .539 1.0

Jacksonville 54 48 .529 2.0

Charlotte 52 50 .510 4.0

Houston 44 58 .431 12.0

 

Marvin Jenkins is in his prime and would like to test the market (a good move on his part), and Edward James and Rolf Dreikugeln feel the same way.

 

So. Should be a pretty interesting free agency period.

GO MEMPHIS YOU FUCKERS~!!! GO DAMMIT~!!! MAKE THE PLAYOFFS~!!!

 

I'd like to say, I get traded. I know I will.

 

Oh, and I wonder WHY I'm a free agent at the end of this season? Could it be that I got SHAFTED on arbitration and Memphis practically gets a hell of a deal for me?

 

When I go onto the free agency market, I see practically every team aiming for my services. Every single team. Although, I want to be hired by Jacksonville, our SFBL Yankees.

 

I hate being on the Devil Rays of our league. I'm hoping Atlanta chokes so I can get my glorious playoff run that only further increases the cash that will be THROWN at me this off-season.

[Guest Evolution]

SFBL

August 2012

 

Awards/SFBL Players In The News:

 

Suzuki wins Player of the Week Award

 

The East-West's best player of the week was Phoenix's Shiro Suzuki, who wins the award for the 6th time in his career. In 22 at bats he hit .409 with 4 HR and 7 RBI. His season numbers are: .362 AVG, 153 hits, 27 doubles, 7 triples and 17 homeruns, along with 74 RBI and 72 runs scored. He's 1st in the East-West in batting and 7th in RBI!

 

DeSantis wins Player of the Week award

 

It's the 12th time that the North-South Player of the Week award goes to Atlanta's first baseman Carlos DeSantis. In 21 at bats he hit .571 with 5 HR and 14 RBI. Carlos managed to drive in at least one run in every game he played this week. He has now homered in 3 consecutive games as well! Carlos is hitting .364 this year, with 164 hits in 451 at bats. He has driven in 116 runs, slugging .647. He's 1st in the North-South in batting, 2nd in homeruns and 2nd in RBI!

 

Ghandi wins Player of the Week award

 

Winston Ghandi from Jacksonville wins his 3rd Player of the Week award for putting up the best numbers this week in the North-South. Winston was on fire, hitting .526 with 2 HR and 10 RBI. Winston managed to drive in at least one run in every game he played this week. His season features a batting average of .303 (141 hits in 466 AB), 25 doubles, 6 triples and 21 longballs. Ghandi collected 77 RBI and 91 runs as well.

 

DeSantis (ATL) wins monthly award

 

The North-South's best player of the month was Atlanta's Carlos DeSantis, who wins the award for the 7th time in his career. Carlos was on fire, hitting .436 with 9 homeruns and 33 RBI. His season numbers are .374 AVG, 181 hits, 28 doubles, 4 triples and 35 homeruns, along with 124 RBI and 120 runs scored. He's 1st in the North-South in batting, 2nd in homeruns and 2nd in RBI!

 

East-West Standings

 

East

 

Team W L PCT GB

Baltimore 74 57 .565 -

Boston 74 57 .565 -

New York 65 66 .496 9.0

Philadelphia 65 66 .496 9.0

New Jersey 59 72 .450 15.0

 

West

 

Team W L PCT GB

Denver 74 57 .565 -

Las Vegas 66 65 .504 8.0

Phoenix 64 67 .489 10.0

Seattle 64 67 .489 10.0

Los Angeles 50 81 .382 24.0

 

North-South Standings

 

North

 

Team W L PCT GB

Columbus 72 59 .550 -

Detroit 66 65 .504 6.0

Indianapolis 63 68 .481 9.0

Chicago 57 74 .435 15.0

Vancouver 53 78 .405 19.0

 

South

 

Team W L PCT GB

Jacksonville 77 54 .588 -

Atlanta 76 55 .580 1.0

Memphis 76 55 .580 1.0

Charlotte 65 66 .496 12.0

Houston 50 81 .382 27.0

 

A peek at the Wildcard Standings (if they actually mattered):

 

East-West Wildcard Race

 

Team W L PCT GB Streak

Las Vegas 66 65 .504 - L1

New York 65 66 .496 1.0 W1

Philadelphia 65 66 .496 1.0 W1

Phoenix 64 67 .489 2.0 L2

Seattle 64 67 .489 2.0 L2

New Jersey 59 72 .450 7.0 L1

Los Angeles 50 81 .382 16.0 W2

 

North-South Wildcard Race

 

Team W L PCT GB Streak

Atlanta 76 55 .580 - L1

Memphis 76 55 .580 - W1

Detroit 66 65 .504 10.0 W4

Charlotte 65 66 .496 11.0 W1

Indianapolis 63 68 .481 13.0 L1

Chicago 57 74 .435 19.0 L1

Vancouver 53 78 .405 23.0 W1

Houston 50 81 .382 26.0 L5

 

POWER RANKINGS:

(* denotes division leader)

 

RANK (Last Month) Team Points

1st (3rd) Memphis 110

2nd (6th) Baltimore 109 *

3rd (9th) Jacksonville 107 *

4th (8th) Atlanta 106

5th (5th) Boston 105 *

6th (1st) Denver 96 *

7th (2nd) Columbus 95 *

8th (13th) Seattle 93

9th (14th) Las Vegas 92

10th (15th) Detroit 92

11th (4th) Philadelphia 91

12th (11th) New York 91

13th (12th) Charlotte 89

14th (7th) Indianapolis 86

15th (12th) Phoenix 85

16th (17th) New Jersey 77

17th (16th) Chicago 77

18th (19th) Vancouver 70

19th (18th) Houston 69

20th (20th) Los Angeles 61

 

Injuries:

 

Sunday 8/5/2012 :

 

HOU: Patrick Hannon was injured while throwing a ball.

Diagnosis: Pulled Elbow Ligament.

He is day-to-day, but full recovery will take one week.

 

Monday 8/20/2012 :

 

ATL: Giant Gonzales was injured while pitching.

Diagnosis: Tight Shoulder.

He is day-to-day, but full recovery will take one week.

 

Monday 8/27/2012 :

 

ATL: Carlos DeSantis was injured while running the bases.

Diagnosis: Bruised Heel.

He is day-to-day, but full recovery will take 5 days.

 

TSM Rankings:

 

Batters - Last Month:

 

1) Robert Henderson (.419, 6 HR, 27 RBI)

2) R.J. Frost (.330, 10 HR, 25 RBI)

3) Carlos DeSantis (.409, 7 HR, 19 RBI)

4) Edward James (.344, 4 HR, 18 RBI)

5) Winston Ghandi (.326, 5 HR, 11 RBI)

6) Logan Caldwell (.294, 4 HR, 17 RBI)

7) Shiro Suzuki (.362, 2 HR, 11 RBI)

8) Joseph Corbin (.241, 6 HR, 16 RBI)

9) Patrick Hannon (.242, 4 HR, 10 RBI)

10) David Hunter (.188, 2 HR, 11 RBI)

11) John Duran (.222, 2 HR, 3 RBI)

12) Charlie Matthews (Did Not Play)

 

Batters - This Month:

 

1) Carlos DeSantis (.436, 9 HR, 33 RBI)

2) Shiro Suzuki (.376, 8 HR, 24 RBI)

3) Winston Ghandi (.321, 6 HR, 24 RBI)

4) David Hunter (.310, 5 HR, 16 RBI)

5) Logan Caldwell (.314, 4 HR, 23 RBI)

6) Joseph Corbin (.300, 2 HR, 16 RBI)

7) Robert Henderson (.362, 4 HR, 14 RBI)

8) Edward James (.279, 2 HR, 16 RBI)

9) R.J. Frost (.237, 3 HR, 22 RBI)

10) Charlie Matthews (.234, 3 HR, 14 RBI)

11) John Duran (.282, 2 HR, 12 RBI)

12) Patrick Hannon (.200, 7 HR, 17 RBI)

 

Batters - Overall:

 

1) Carlos DeSantis (.373, 35 HR, 124 RBI)

2) Robert Henderson (.359, 26 HR, 99 RBI)

3) Edward James (.311, 27 HR, 92 RBI)

4) R.J. Frost (.289, 36 HR, 118 RBI)

5) Shiro Suzuki (.365, 22 HR, 94 RBI)

6) Winston Ghandi (.304, 22 HR, 80 RBI)

7) David Hunter (.260, 16 HR, 63 RBI)

8) Logan Caldwell (.308, 17 HR, 88 RBI)

9) Joseph Corbin (.286, 16 HR, 72 RBI)

10) Patrick Hannon (.225, 25 HR, 75 RBI)

11) John Duran (.261, 12 HR, 50 RBI)

12) Charlie Matthes (.224, 9 HR, 35 RBI)

 

Starting Pitchers:

1) Marvin Jenkins (2.83)

2) Eric LeBeau (2.93)

3) Giant Gonzales (3.88)

4) Ben Dover (4.21)

 

Relievers:

1) The Berzerker (2.11)

2) Peter Kostka (3.53)

 

Notes: Kostka is back from AAA and was able to get a handful of games in August, improving his numbers somewhat.

 

August was the month of Carlos, as he certainly earned that batter of the month award. Edward James struggled a little bit, but R.J. Frost struggled more. David Hunter once again is showing signs of life in Seattle, but it looks like deSantis is on his way to yet another Big Stick Award.

 

Is it surprising to ANYONE that Jacksonville is back at the top of the South Division? I'm not sure if it's been this close before, however. Charlotte has eliminated themselves from contention by simply not winning any games (imagine that), but Memphis and Atlanta still remain credible and deadly contenders to Jacksonville's weak offense. Should the pitching remain strong, however, it might be yet another banner year for the Jackoffs.

 

Giant Gonzales returned in late August to pitch three games for the Hanoi Janes, picking up two losses against Jacksonville and Memphis and a no-decision against Indianapolis. Gonzales has yet to pitch to a victory against Jacksonville or Memphis, but Gonzales is known for doing well against Indianapolis, so there are some worries in the Atlanta dugout as to exactly how good Gonzales is.

 

Nothing new on the contract extension front or anything, as it's clear that the three free agents mentioned earlier have every intention to follow through on their desire to test out the market during the offseason. Where they land remains to be seen, although Edward James moving to the Jackoffs is a possibility: They have the money and they need one more offensive spark to round out an already good base offense of Eugene Widrick and Winston Ghandi. Don't take my word for it, though, because James could just as easily end up on one of the gutter teams like Los Angeles or Houston.

 

Also, things in the East have just gotten interesting as perennial losers Boston are suddenly finding themselves challening a weakening Baltimore team for the top spot in the East Division. Chances are they won't make it to the Championship against the still-strong Denver Douchebags, but a playoff visit by the Tea Baggers would be a HUGE moral victory for a team that has never been that good except for Georgie Stanback and (now) Miguel Moldonado.

 

It should be a wacky home stretch. Jacksonville will face off against Memphis for two games on September 20th and 21st, and then will go on the road to face the Hanoi Janes on the 22nd and 23rd. The season for both teams in question could be over by then--but chances are the Jackoffs will be playing for their playoff spot in those games. Also, Jacksonville has a game each at Atlanta and at home against Memphis on October 3rd and 4th, respectively, the final two games of the season which should be very, very heated.

 

Atlanta, meanwhile, has three games against Memphis right off the bat in September, a good chance to distance themselves from the Eels. Another Memphis game falls on September 29th, a Saturday matinee that should bring out the crowd in droves. Atlanta's final game looks to be a cruise against Indianapolis--the only question is whether or not Atlanta will be in first, second or third place by the time that game on October 4th rolls around.

 

Marvin Jenkins.

 

What the fuck is he smoking?

 

12 straight winning decisions. That means that he's won 12 in a row. No no-decisions in between. 12 wins. His last loss was on June 14th, a loss where he pitched eight innings and allowed three runs on seven hits.

 

Marvin has won 16 of his last 17 decisions, and 18 of his last 20 decisions. This is after starting the season with 4 losses in his 7 first decisions. Marvin has also won 11 straight decisions at home.

 

What a beast.

 

It's really sad that his efforts will be overshadowed by the one-two punch of Georgie Stanback and Miguel Moldonado.

 

Few notes for James:

 

Jacksonville can't be the SFBL Yankees. Their offense sucks. The Yankees don't.

 

Memphis can't be the SFBL Devil Rays. They're a game behind the "Yankees" for first place in the South Division.

 

Oh, and you're likely a free agent because you are not very loyal to any team that you are on, even though you don't care if you're on a winning team or not. DeSantis stayed with Atlanta purely because he felt like being loyal to one team instead of bouncing around and making buku bucks on the free agency market.