PROMO - A less-than-triumphant return

[Guest Goose749]

or, Why I Stopped Writing Promos:

 

The scene opens, revealing Ben Hardy backstage, outside a dressing room. Hardy knocks on the door. Receiving no answer, he tries the knob.

 

Gus: Ben, are you sure we should be doing this?

 

Hardy: Listen, ok? We were told to come down here and do an interview. Now, I’m not leaving until that interview is done.

 

Gus: But, maybe this guy doesn’t want us to do an interview. We don’t even know who he is.

 

Hardy: We’ll find out soon enough. Anyway, I’m sure he won’t mind us going in. The door’s unlocked.

 

Ben Hardy opens the door and enters. The camera pans the empty room. It comes to rest on a table at the far end of the room, with a plate on it. Beside the plate is a sign that reads, “For that annoying interviewer, Ben Hardy.”

 

Hardy: See, look. He left cookies for us. How bad could this be?

 

Hardy lifts the plate, and takes a cookie. He brings it to his mouth, but before he can take a bite, the door to the dressing room slams shut. The plate drops from Hardy’s hands, and the camera swings around, revealing a hooded man in black robes.

 

H.M.: You’re not supposed to be in here.

 

Hardy: Um... We were sent here to interview...

 

H.M.: Yes, you came to see me, to speak with me about my entrance in the SJL, to hear my glorious ramblings of seizing the SJL Championship, and ascending to the SWF, and to eat my cookies.

 

Hardy: Yeah, so, tell us, why are you...

 

H.M.: I am here in the SJL to wreak vengeance upon those who have done me injustice in the past. I wear this hood to protect my identity. For the same reason, I will not reveal against whom I will have my revenge. Let’s just say I’ve got my eye on that belt, and all those now in competition for it.

 

Hardy: So, you’re a former SJL star?

 

H.M.: Yes.

 

Hardy: And you’re here because of a deep-seated grudge against everyone better than you?

 

H.M.: Uh... I didn’t say that...

 

Hardy: You’re Jimmy Liston, are you?

 

H.M.: ...no...

 

Hardy: Yes you are! Why are you wearing that ridiculous hood?

 

H.M.: NO! I am NOT Jimmy Liston! In fact, I HATE Jimmy Liston! Yeah, that’s right, I hate him!!! Grrr, watch your back, Liston, wherever you are!!!

 

Hardy: Come on, you’re Liston. Take that stupid thing off.

 

H.M.: NO!!! I must not reveal...

 

Hardy: Everyone knows who you are. What’s the point?

 

H.M.: Well... To leave some doubt in their minds.

 

Hardy: Give it up. And while you’re at it, get a better gimmick. Jacob Helmsley just used the masked man routine.

 

H.M.: ...He did?

 

Hardy: Afraid so. Come on, Gus. Let’s get out of here.

 

After a brief hesitation, Liston removes the hood. Hardy and Gus walk out of the dressing room. Liston calls after them.

 

Liston: Hey, aren’t you supposed to interview me?

 

Hardy: What’s the point?

 

The door closes, and the camera turns to Hardy, standing in the hallway, leaning against the wall. The scene fades out with Ben Hardy’s final words hanging in the air.

 

Hardy: Geez, what a waste of time.

[Ace309 0]

*snicker*

 

 

Hey, a bookable writer!

[Guest Goose749]

actually, not for the moment. I need until the end of next week at the earliest (yay exams). Just trying to get back on my feet.

 

... not that I was ever on my feet in the first place.

[Longdogger_Pete 0]

PM me when you're ready Liston. The holiday show is the 21st, or I can put you down for "after the break."