King Cucaracha 0 Report post Posted April 10, 2004 Wow. Clearing out my PM folder, and I just now realise I've got 95% of my matches still laying around. Considering this was only my third match, I'm pretty proud of it. The fact I beat Todd makes me even more proud of it of course. Then again, it amazes me how far I've come since this match. Anyway...this'll give the guys who didn't read the SJL shows a little better idea of Todd and Landon's history, and how it 'all began'. For the rest of the stories, go to the JL folder and read through. I'm too lazy to put up the rest. =========================================== With the camera focused in on the heart warmingly religious sight of the front of the Holy Bible…before panning out to reveal the heart warmingly less religious view of the ‘good book’ hanging from a Vince Russo cast off pole in the corner of a wrestling ring…SJL Metal returns to our screens ready for the Television Championship to be put on the line…but not before our commentary team get their say… Annie- Welcome back to SJL Metal…as moments away, the SINGLE biggest night in the life of Landon “La Cucaracha” Maddix, as he takes on the reigning SJL Television Champion…Ejiro, your buddy Todd Royal. Ejiro- First off, he is not my buddy…he is my Todd and my Saviour. Nobody is ‘buddies’ with Todd…only followers. And speaking of followers, tonight is going to be perhaps the biggest walkover in the history of professional wrestling. I mean seriously…Landon Maddix, ‘the little kid that could’. And Todd Royal. That my friends is a mismatch. Judge- Not to mention the fact you win by grabbing the Holy Bible… Annie- Well I can see you two are in your bias mode as far as Todd Royal goes, but I think the kid could steal it here. Ejiro- NO! Don’t’ tell me you are abandoning your ‘wikkle Toddess’. Annie- Well…err…no… Judge- Ejiro…don’t confuse her. She’s near intolerable as it is. The commentary team’s opening argument is ended as Funyon is now in the ring, ready to introduce us to the competitors. Funyon- Ladies and gentlemen, the following contest is for…the SJL WORLD TELEVISION CHAMPIONSHIP…with the winner being the first man to take possession of the Holy Bible. Judge- I tell you, this has GOT to be a wrestling first. A Bible on a Pole Match? Ejiro- I know…since when did Russo start working here? Suddenly “The Fight Song” by Marilyn Manson begins to blare out around the arena, as Landon Maddix runs out from the back…stopping suddenly in shock at the reaction he is getting, both from his new found fans and from the many anti-Todd sections of the crowd. Getting over the slight shock, Landon bounds down the aisleway and starts to slap the outstretched hands of the fans making up the front row of the aisle. Funyon- Introducing first, the challenger this evening. Hailing from Huron, South Dakota and weighing in at 206 pounds…LANDON…“LA CUCARACHA”…MAAADDIIIX Maddix gets to the apron, and rolls into the ring before spinning around with arms outstretched, before stopping and staring up at the Holy Bible hanging from the pole in the top right corner of the ring. Annie- Todd had better not be taking Landon Maddix too lightly, because this kid is unbeaten… Ejiro- WOAH WOAH WOAH! He’s unbeaten sure. But he has had TWO matches. And neither of them was against someone with anywhere near the abilities of Todd Royal. Seemingly transfixed, Landon continues to look up at the Holy Bible until suddenly the lights dim, catching Landon’s attention. A solitary spotlight shines down on the entrance way, as a soft ‘aaaaaaaahhhhhhh’ sound can be heard in the background. Funyon- And his opponent…Accompanied to the ring by Megan Skye. He is from San Diego, California and weighs in at 220 pounds…the reigning and defending SJL…WOOOOORRRRRLLLLDD TELEVISION CHAMPION….TODD ROYAL!!!!! As soon as Funyon gets those final words out, Motley Crue’s “Livewire” hits as the blue and white strobe lights have started up. The crowd are booing away in the background at the typically over-lavish Todd Royal entrance, as Todd’s “Toddess” Megan Skye walks out through the curtain. Pointing back she waits as out steps the Television Champion himself, ‘TODD BLESS YOU’ vest and black sunglasses on as ever. Handing a towel to Megan, the two walk down the aisle slowly as Landon is having to wait and watch all of this lavish entrance. Ejiro- Why do these fans INSIST on booing the great Todd? I mean look at that….an excellent physical specimen. Annie- Yeah…she is isn’t she. Ejiro- I was talking about Todd… Annie- Todd? Todd who? The only person I see walking down that ramp is…(sighs)…Megan. Judge- Man…you really are sexually deprived, aren’t you? Annie- I am where Megan is concerned! Megan gets onto the apron first, and holds the ropes open for the ‘Great Todd’ to enter without having to exert energy to hold the ropes himself. Megan then enters and ‘de-vests’ Todd, as the music dies down and the lights return to normal, enough to see Todd with the ribtape on again. This time Todd seems to have focused on the match in hand, with ‘COCKROACH KILLER’ on the front…turning around to reveal the words ‘I’M YOUR DADDY’ on the back which seem to aggravate Landon. Maddix manages to control his anger enough to keep his head, as Megan leaves the ring with towel in hand. Obviously the Holy Bible is a captivating sight, as now Todd is looking up at the book hanging from the pole. Clasping his hands together, Todd looks like he’s about to say a prayer…to himself, obviously…but is cut off as Landon dropkicks him in the back, sending Todd crashing into the turnbuckles. Ejiro- Oh come on…that’s sacrilegious! Shaking off the blow, Royal looks more angry than he does hurt, as Maddix looks a little worried that he may have pissed off Todd. Indeed, walking forward Todd looks ready to seriously hurt Maddix, and lunges at him with a right hand in the corner where Landon has backed up to. Seeing it coming, Landon ducks and weaves, sending Royal into the corner as he misses the punch. Suddenly the fury in Landon from the ribtape taunts erupts, and he fires away with right hands to the jaw, a series of them connecting with Royal to cheers from the Edmontonians. Landon grabs the great Todd by the arm and whips Royal to the corner, the corner where the Holy Bible is situated. Somehow Todd manages to put on the brakes before he connects with the corner with a baseball slide, and looking up at the good book manages to find some divine inspiration, allowing him to hoist Landon in the air as he charges towards Todd, and drops him face first across the top turnbuckle with a flapjack. Ejiro- Oh my, if that isn’t proof…that’s divine inspiration my good buddy. From saviour to saviour, a little help is always there. Annie- Oh please…the only thing that’s divine around here is… Ejiro and Judge- (mockingly) ‘MEGAN!’ Maddix holds his jaw in pain as from behind Todd gives a mocking slap across the blond haired head of “La Cucaracha”, before throwing Landon’s arm over his head and taking him backwards with a high angled back suplex. The move is met with boos from the Edmonton crowd, as Todd just sticks his head through the top and middle ropes, allowing Megan to towel him off to more boos. Annie- Oh…oh yeah reach, reach baby… Judge- Would you care to give it a rest. Ejiro- Yeah…the thought of two women going at it is arousing, but the thought of you involved is starting to change my views on lesbianism. Getting back to the match, Todd pulls Landon up to his feet, and hits another embarrassing slap across the head before hooking the arm again, this time from the front. Popping the ‘heavenly hips’, Todd takes Landon over with a fast snap suplex, keeping a hold of the head as he lands. Lifting his legs, Todd spins around and up to his feet again, still with Landon’s head and arm hooked. Bringing Landon over again, Todd this time hits a regular speed vertical suplex, as the back still weakened from his match with Tommy Nguyen, is being worked on again. Still Todd keeps the hold on, and spins up to his feet for a third suplex. Before hoisting Maddix up the thrid time, he takes a moment to flip off the fans in the direction from where a ‘TODD SUCKS’ chant is now coming from. Todd eventually hoists Landon up into the air for the third time, and this time holds Landon in the air, letting the blood rush to his head… Ejiro- Oh…beautiful. Strength, technique, intensity…it’s all here baby. Judge- And Maddix is two thirds of the way through The Trinity. As soon as Royal hits this he’s got to go for the Bible… As he hangs Maddix in mid-air, Todd has a big smile on his face, obviously now expecting the easy victory. He eventually falls back nailing the hanging vertical suplex and completing The Trinity, as the crowd are again on their feet in boos. Landon is now out on the mat, and Todd seems in two minds, not knowing whever to punish Landon further or go for the Holy Bible. Grabbing Landon by the hair, Royal adjusts his boot slightly before scraping down with the laces across the eyes of Maddix, not gaining the favour of the crowd who start booing once more. Ejiro- That’s a thing of beauty. Annie- That’s an illegal move… Judge- Well It WOULD be if there were no disqualifications in this match. Only way to win is to grab the Bible. And that’s what Todd is going to do right here! Royal checks that Landon is suitably hurt before walking over toward the corner, ready to grab the Bible. Every so often, Todd checks back to see if Landon is getting up, but he shows no signs of movement, so Royal continues on. Ejiro- It’s all plain for To…TODD DAMN HE’S UP! Judge- Behind ya Todd!!! Annie- Oh quit it! Landon Maddix is indeed up, and Todd doesn’t see it. He’s already reaching for the Bible, trying to stay steady on the top rope. On the outside, Megan is trying desperately to get Todd’s attention, but he isn’t listening…he’s close to the book, until Landon superkicks the right leg from under Todd, crotching him backwards on the top rope!!! Ejiro- NO! Judge- NO! Annie- MEGAN! Ejiro and Judge stare over at Annie at the commentary table, as Landon climbs up to the middle rope behind Todd. Grabbing Todd by his short, brown hair Landon throws Todd’s head forwards, sending it bouncing off the pole!!! Adjusting himself on the ropes so he is sideways on to Royal, Landon again slings Royal face first into the steel pole, Todd’s head snapping back on impact. Judge- This pole has more uses than just holding a Bible obviously. Annie- You know what I like poles for…dancing. I wonder if Megan’s ever pole danced. Judge- Why is it so hard for you to concentrate on a match when there’s a chick out here. Ejiro- Megan isn’t just a chick, she’s a Toddess! Don’t forget that! Landon rams Todd’s head into the pole again, before cheekily pushing Todd, and Todd falls backwards but his leg gets caught behind the turnbuckle, and suddenly he’s caught in the tree of woe! Seeing this, Maddix’s eyes light up…he’s got a chance! Maddix steadies himself on the ropes… Todd is still in the tree of woe… And Maddix is close… Within touching distance… But not for long, as Megan leaps onto the apron and shoves Maddix, causing him to go FLYING off the top, to the outside, crashing jaw first into the barricade!!! Ejiro- Ah ha ha!!! Beautiful! Annie- You’re telling me! Judge- Err…Annie, I thought you were routing for Landon here. Annie- I am…but there’s routing for someone, and then there’s fancying the hell out of someone else. Whilst on the apron, Megan quickly helps Todd get untied from the tree of woe, to admonishment from referee Sexton Hardcastle despite the no disqualifications ruling. Megan jumps down from the apron, as Todd is now looking angry as he rolls to the outside rather than going for the Bible. Maddix meanwhile tries to pull himself up on the railings, and almost does so before Todd comes over and throws Maddix face first into the steel. Rebounding off, we get a shot that shows Landon is now bleeding from the mouth. This only spurs Todd on more, and he picks “La Cucaracha” up and throws him face first into the apron this time. Shoving Landon into the ring, Royal seems in total control…but he has to go for the Bible. For some reason, he doesn’t do so, and decides to dish out some more punishment to Maddix, hitting a couple of stomps to the back of the head of the floored Maddix. Pulling Landon up to his feet, Royal grabs Maddix’s jaw in between his index finger and thumb, and starts to talk trash to the young kid before nailing a knee to the gut. Royal then makes a gesture to Landon about the championship being his, before hitting a right hand to the kneeling youngster Ejiro- The almighty Todd is in control good buddies. Annie- Well you’ve changed your tune from last week…last week it was all about Jay Morrison. Ejiro- Yeah…yeah, well…I’VE SEEN THE LIGHT! Annie- Yes…well…I guess I walked right into that one. Back in the ring, Todd takes a couple of steps back and dives forward, connecting flush to the back of the head with a diving shining wizard, the ‘SMACK!’ of the blow loud enough for all to hear. The knocked silly Maddix slumps face first forward, as Todd follows the shot up with a legdrop across the back of the head to add further damage. Judge- I wouldn’t be surprised if this kid has a concussion after that kick…that just ECHOED around this arena. A chant of ‘LET’S GO LANDON’ is started up around the arena, Todd glaring at any fan he can see chanting before hitting another legdrop to the back of Maddix’s head. Finally he stops and turns to the pole, and begins to move over…but suddenly stops and stares intently at Landon. A smile on his face, Todd starts to sarcastically applaud as he walks back over to Maddix. Judge- Well, at least he’s learnt his lesson…Todd thinks Landon’s playing possum again. Checking to see if Maddix really is out, Todd grabs the taped wrist of Landon Maddix and drops the arm down…it hits the mat once. Wanting to make totally sure, Royal picks up the hand and drops it a second time… And then picks it up a THIRD time…but this time the arm breaks away from Royal’s grasp and nails a LOW BLOW TO TODD!!! Annie- He was right…Landon was playing possum. Ejiro- Oh…you think? Annie- Oh…do I detect SARCASM in your voice. Judge- I’d call that touché buddy. Holding his groin area, Todd is now doubled over. Still favouring his head, Landon manages to get to his feet and grab Todd in a headlock. Maddix suddenly runs forward, keeping the headlock on, and using the turnbuckle to propel himself round into a swinging bulldog driving Royal face first to the mat. The crowd are now on their feet, trying to encourage Landon to go and get the Bible, but Maddix has other ideas, and pulls Todd up onto all fours. With a smile on his face, Landon suddenly hooks his hands into the ribtape, and the crowd love it. Ejiro- NO! HE HAS HURT RIBS! Annie- He’s about to have exposed ribs! Megan jumps up onto the apron, imploring Landon to leave the tape alone, but this just brings a smile to Maddix’s face and spurs him on…he tears the tape, and Maddix slowly unravels it all from the ribs of Todd…and as he does, a pair of brass knuckles falls to the mat! Ejiro- Ah crap… Judge- No no…Ejiro, he can’t get DQed remember. Ejiro- Oooh…oh yes, yes, Todd Damn YES!!! Annie- ‘Todd Damn’…Maddix is going to use them… Ejiro- Oh…wait, that’s not fair! Landon picks up the brass knuckles with a smile, slowly slipping them onto his right hand as the fans are now going crazy, the support Maddix has built up and Todd has shunned grouping together. Holding the knuckled hand in the air, Maddix looks for a little more crowd approval, but as he does Todd is up from behind and grabs Landon’s right hand with his left. Hooking the arm under the opposite armpit, Royal does the same with the left arm as Maddix is now ‘straitjacketed’. Landon drops down to his knees to find an escape, but Royal senses it early, and steps into a ‘Straitjacket Camel Clutch’!!! Judge- He’s got it slapped on perfectly, Maddix has no escape! Ejiro- Submissions count right? Please say submissions count. Judge- No they don’t. Ejiro- TODD DAMN IT! Why not? Annie- Don’t you think this whole ‘Todd Damn’ stuff is getting old already? Judge- No… Ejiro- Not really. Maddix tries to crawl away for an escape, even trying to force a break by grabbing the ropes by his teeth, but can’t. Eventually Todd drags up Maddix, still keeping the straitjacket on, and throwing Landon backwards hits a release Straitjacket Suplex! The move is met with applause…if only from Megan, but applause nonetheless. Todd glances over at the Bible yet again, and again remembers Landon’s history of playing possum. As such, Todd drags Maddix to his feet, removing the brass knuckles from his hand as he does so, and pushes him up against the ropes adjacent to the pole. Forcing Landon’s arms over the top rope, Royal grabs the middle rope also and tries to tie Maddix up in the ropes! Ejiro- Oh this is great strategy. Landon won’t be playing possum with his arms tied to the ring. Annie- If you ask me, it… Ejiro- Nobody did! Landon tries to wriggle free before he can be tied in the ropes, but Todd manages to drive an elbow to the temple, staggering him enough to grab the two ropes again, and tie Landon’s arms up. The Edmonton crowd boo Todd’s cowardice, as he smiles and gives Maddix a playful slap to the face, taunting the young kid mercifully. Royal turns to go for the Bible, but his attention is diverted by the shining brass knuckles laying in the middle of the ring, and looking back at Maddix a grin adorns Royal’s face. Judge- Ok…this may be a bit too far… Ejiro- What are you talking about? This going to be great. That cut on Landon’s lip is gonna be nothing compared to the cuts Todd’s going to slice into Maddix with! Todd slowly walks over, and picks up the brass knuckles before placing them on his right hand, and looking longingly at them, before walking back over to Maddix. Sexton Hardcastle stands in front of Landon, trying to do his job and protect the helpless kid despite the no DQ rules. Doing the right thing, Hardcastle stands his ground as Royal begins to close in, yelling at Hardcastle to move. Refusing to do so, Royal forcibly moves him by grabbing a hold of the referee’s jacket and sending him hurtling off to the left. Royal shouts down at Hardcastle, and raises his arm ready to use the knux, but the distraction allows Landon to lean back against the ropes, giving him leverage to nail a boot to the gut to Todd! Maddix leans back again as Royal moves in again, this time Landon hooks both his legs around Todd’s head and rolling backwards. With his head hooked, Royal goes flying over the ropes, Maddix hurricanrana-ing him over the top rope!!! Annie- That’ll teach that cocky SOB for laying his hands on an SJL official… Judge- And Maddix is free! Landon Maddix, by leaning back to hit the hurricanrana, untied his arms and can get to the Bible!!! Landon is indeed untied, laying on the apron, but slowly crawling towards the turnbuckles on the outside. The crowd are now on their feet, cheering him on, as the young kid is beginning to make it towards the turnbuckles. Megan is looking on, a look of sheer horror on her face as she tries to revive Todd, but he’s still seeing stars from his bump off the concrete. Wiping some of the blood from his lip, Landon reaches his arm up and grabs a hold of the top turnbuckle and tries to haul himself up. Now on his knees, Landon is looking up at the Bible, trying to will himself on to go further. The crowd cheers begin to do their job, as seemingly Landon finds a surge on energy… Landon’s back on his feet… …and getting ready to climb the buckles… …Megan suddenly leaves Todd’s side, jumps onto the apron and starts choking the hell out of Landon with the trusty towel carried with her!!! She leaps up onto Maddix’s back to try and get a little more leverage on the choke, but suddenly Landon reaches back, grabs Megan’s hair and pulls her over his back sending her crashing into the ring. Again the crowd are almost deafening, as Maddix now steps into the ring, with a little revenge on his mind. Ejiro- Oh no…TODD! TODD, GET UP!!! Judge- Don’t do it Landon! Annie- No, do it! Rip her top off!!! Landon grabs Megan by the hair again, ‘The Toddess’ on her knees begging for mercy. Suddenly, the cheers from the crowd turn into shouts, trying to warn Landon that Todd is back up on the apron and is trying to go for the book!!!!! Landon doesn’t see it, as he hooks up Megan’s head ready for a suplex…before hooking her leg and looks to hit the Fisherman’s Buster…but suddenly, he notices Todd is up and is just inches away from the book! Ejiro- TODD’S GOT IT!!! Judge- No…no he hasn’t!!! Todd touches the book with his fingers… …but suddenly loses his footing at the worst possible time. Cursing under his breath, Todd begins to climb again… …as Landon Maddix runs up the turnbuckles with amazing balance, and takes Todd off the top rope with super armdrag, Megan only just avoiding being squashed by Royal!!! Annie- Come on kid…come on, live your dream… Ejiro- Give it a rest with the dream crap Annie. At least the Todd Damn stuff is creative. Landon jumps through the middle and top rope to the apron, and looks to go up top…but goes to the wrong corner, not going for the Bible. Suddenly a big smile appears on Landon’s face, and giving the cutthroat signal the crowd instantly explode with noise, all knowing what’s coming next! Judge- Listen to this crowd!!! In the home of the great Chris Benoit, Landon is going to the top rope for the CockroachDive Headbutt… Ejiro- The WHAT!?! What sort of a move name is that!?! This kid’s an idiot. Annie- This ‘idiot’ is about to become the new Television Champion. Ejiro- Then why isn’t he going for the Bible? He’s an idiot! Getting to the top rope, Maddix extends his arms, and propels forward for the diving headbutt…but at the last moment, Megan drags Royal’s prone body out of the way, and Landon SMACKS face first into the canvas. Almost deafening boos fill the arena as Megan is chastised by Hardcastle and sent out of the ring. Todd, groggy and dazed, gets up to his feet once more, and a little confused Todd grabs a hold of Landon’s right leg, spins around with his own leg, places Maddix’s legs in the ‘4’ position and locks on the Wrath of Todd!!! Ejiro- No…TODD GO UP!!! Judge- I think Royal is letting the anger get the better of him here. He should go for the book instead of trying to punish the kid. Wrenching back with his legs, Todd is trying to punish Landon even more than he already has. Despite the fact there are no submissions in the Todd Bless You Match, Royal continues to wrench away in the Wrath of Todd…and Landon begins to tap out in desperation and pain. Sensing ‘La Cucaracha’ is done, Royal finally releases the hold, and is greeted by familiar boos from the many Edmontonians. Slowly, Todd raises his own right arm to his throat…and gives the cutthroat signal himself! Judge- Oh…he wouldn’t! Ejiro- Todd…don’t do it! Royal begins to climb up to the top rope again, but Landon is desperately pulling himself up, gritted teeth he is determined not to give in on his opportunity. Todd stops, gives up and goes for the Bible again, but Maddix is up and crawling over again. Royal has the advantage, he’s almost at the book already as Maddix is only just getting to the corner. Ejiro- He’s seen the light…Todd is going to do it… With both hands clasped around the pole, Todd climbs to the top rope itself to get to the book which is hung higher than he’d expected. Maddix is trying to pull himself up, seeing his dream slipping away… ROYAL HAS HIS HAND ON THE BOOK… …CLASPS THE FINGERS… MADDIX SHAKES THE ROPE!!! Todd crashes groin first across the top turnbuckle, as Maddix backs up and takes a deep breath. Suddenly charging forward, Maddix springboards off the middle rope, and nails the SUPER shining wizard kick FLUSH to the back of Royal’s head! Todd slumps forward…and crashes down to the mat, bouncing his head off the apron on the way down. Maddix has a clear run suddenly. Megan runs around the ring, and tries to revive Todd. But it seems all over… Maddix is climbing… …to the middle rope…to the top…the book is within reach… HIS HAND IS INCHES AWAY… Megan jumps to the apron… IT’S TOO LATE!!!!!! *DING* *DING* *DING* Judge- We have a NEW CHAMPION~! Funyon- Ladies and gentlemen…the winner…and NEEEEEWWWWW SJL WORLD TELEVISION CHAMPIIIOOON…LAAANDOON MAAAAADDIIIIIX!!! Absolute ELATION overtakes Maddix, as Sexton Hardcastle goes the outside and retrieves the SJL Television Championship belt from the timekeeper’s table. Maddix jumps down from the top rope, and kisses the Bible in his joy. Hardcastle rolls back in, and passes the new champ his belt to deafening cheers. Judge- Incredible. This kid is the SJL World Television Champion, after three weeks in the SJL…and he has beaten Todd Royal… Ejiro- He would NOT have won if this wasn’t such a STUPID stipulation. Maddix tapped out to Royal during the damn match!!! If this was a normal match, Todd Royal would still be the SJL Television Champion Todd Damn It!!! Judge- Well that may be the case, but…HEY! Maddix is on his knees, in a moment mirroring his idol Shawn Michaels from Wrestlemania XIII, belt cradled in his arms and tears in his eyes. On the outside, Todd is beyond mad, fuming on the outside as suddenly he picks up a steel chair. Rolling back in, the elated Maddix doesn’t see him coming… CRAAAAACK!!! Todd crashes the chair over the back of Maddix’s head. Landon is knocking out INSTANTLY, as the fuming Todd turns Maddix over…and shouts into his face… "NOBODY GETS ONE OVER ON ME…TODD DAMN IT…NOBODY!!!" …before spitting down on Maddix, and storming off, glaring at Megan despite all her help, as the crowd are incensed, booing the hell out of Todd for his dastardly actions. Annie- Damn it, that’s not right. This is Landon’s greatest moment of his life… Ejiro- At the expense of Todd Royal. And NO-ONE gets the better of Todd Royal…nobody. Let’s go to a Todd Damn break! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
