SWF Smarkdown!

[the.weej 0]

BOOM

 

BOOM

 

SMARKDOWN!!!!!!

 

The screen lights up as the intro to Smarkdown fades away, letting the roaring crowd of Omaha, Nebraska breath life into the show. As the camera pans across the arena, it catches signs such as “Danny Williams is Your God!” and “The Superior Inferiority.” The fans continue to cheer in pride as the SWF returns to their hometown.

 

Comet: “Greeting Civilians and welcome to SWF Smarkdown! We are live and ready to kick some A-double Smarkdownz here in the lovely Rosenblatt stadium!”

 

Riley: “It’s a stadium yet I don’t even know the team who plays here!”

 

Comet: “Stevens would kill you for a comment like that.”

 

Riley: “But he’s not here now… is he.”

 

Comet: “Bah you numbskull. Anyway, to the fine people watching at home, we have got quite the card for you today. Included in it is Danny Williams going one on one with Toxxic for a shot at the World Heavyweight championship.”

 

Riley: “Plus your hero and mine, Tom Flesher in a match against Johnny Dangerous.”

 

Comet: “Also on the card today, a bit of the more unusual matches for the ICTV championship, that being a Boiler Room Brawl. Jamie Drazon will take on the newly crowned ICTV champion, Landon Maddix. Drazon hasn’t been around much since making a return at 13th Hour with a win over Munich. However rest assured he is right at home in the environment tonight.”

 

Riley: “I don’t think it matters, Landon is today’s hottest rising star!”

 

As if the show cut off the air, the lights in the arena cut out. Lighters, glowsticks, and numerous contingency kits illuminate parts of the arena as the crowd decides to cheer until given a reason not to. Finally after 10 full seconds of the lights disappearing, the opening tune of Marilyn Manson's "Dope Hat" hits the speakers. It takes the audience a few moments to recognize the tune, but it’s not long before they raise their earlier applause level up a notch.

 

“MY BAG OF TRICKS WILL MAKE YOU HAPPY”

 

The goth rocker’s voice can be heard puncturing into the eardrums of the thousands in attendance, however they continue to cheer. Finally, to the delight of many Jamie Drazon steps through the curtains, making his first live Smarkdown appearance in ages. Although comfortable with the crowd, he remains calm as he briefly scans the arena, letting them absorb his essence. Dressed in a button up T-shirt left open, and an expensive pair of black pants with a belt over top. He finally walks down the isle and to the ring, receiving a cheer most of the way.

 

Comet: “Jamie Drazon makes his return to Smarkdown, and the crowd is thrilled to have him here!”

 

Riley: “Bah! I liked him better when he was on the injured list.”

 

Comet: “Only having one match since his return, Drazon has been thrust into an ICTV title match with the red hot La Cucharacha Maddix. Landon defeated Ace Lezaire in a spectacular match last week, however he did receive some assistance from his managerial services. One might say it is a step up for the returning JD, who some say he may need to get into the full swing of things once more, however those who may think he is at a disadvantage for this reason are wrong… dead wrong. They are wrong for the reason of three simple words.”

 

Riley(in a sighing tone): “Boiler Room Brawl.”

 

Comet: “The homefield advantage has just been handed to Jamie Drazon, because I assure you, noone is more at home in the hardcore environment then Jamie Drazon… save for maybe Dace Night.”

 

Riley: “And now the asshole is going to let us all know about it.”

 

Comet: “Something is certainly on his mind, and I think he should be able to get a chance to say it.”

 

Drazon waists little time snagging a microphone and sliding into the center of the ring. Pulling a cutthroat motion with his thumb, he signals the music to shut off and lowers his hands repeatedly for the crowd to quiet down. Although they tone it down, they hardly shut up, as some continue to cheer for Drazon.

 

“You know-“ slight pause for the crowd. “It’s not often lately, I’ve had anything to say here! Heck, part of me has wondered even what’s the point!”

 

Drazon seems to reach the crowd with the comment, and they begin to quiet down more, curious to what he has to say.

 

“For the last year and a half now. I have attempted to make returns to this federation! And you know something… Each time I try, some new bullshit comes right out!” Drazon begins walking around the ring, remaining calm as he tries to clarify his point to the crowd. “But the time has come, for me to once again bring back to this fed, a side of the Maniac.”

 

Comet: “Drazon earned the nickname ‘Hardcore Maniac’ for his iron fisted hardcore title reign.”

 

Riley: “Maniac? He was the hardcore menace. You couldn’t get into a match with him without being bashed with a chair or thrown through a table.”

 

Comet: “Sweet foreshadowing for Maddix dear Riles.”

 

“I’ve searched through this fed… I‘ve searched through my life… and for a very long time, I was lost. I was lost because for so long, I let something very important elude me. I let petty emotional distractions carry me off and get in the way. But you know something… That was then!” Drazon pauses in the center of the ring, switching directions as the crowd pops briefly.

 

“In the present day that shit no longer exists! The SWF is very real on the otherhand… and has something I want very much! And until I reach my goal, I will not stop! Under no circumstances will I ever stop- for it is my time to bring home- what is rightfully mine!” Drazon punctuates the last sentence by throwing his fist into the air, getting a pop as he cracks his neck, briefly pacing around the ring to gather some more things to say.

 

Comet: “Drazon telling some of the crowd his reasons for coming back.”

 

Riley: “Puh-lease… the poor guy is about as motivated as a turnip.”

 

Comet: “Must you negate everything I say?”

 

Riley: “Yep. It says so in my contract… I don’t write ‘em, I just follow ‘em babycakes.”

 

“Onto another matter… that being the ICTV Championship! In my second match back… I shall face Landon ‘La cocharoacha’ Maddix in a Boiler Room Brawl. I don’t know what the hell you are trying to prove kiddo, but you certainly stepped into the wrong direction getting this match with me.” Drazon pauses as the crowd begins to get on Drazon’s side more and more, especially with their most recent feelings with La Cucaracha.

 

Comet: “I don’t think Landon requested this match with JD!”

 

Riley: “I don’t think anybody would be crazy enough to do that. That’s like volunteering to have your ribs split in two.”

 

“I know I haven’t been around for a while… but you son of a bitch. Do you really think you have an ounce of what it takes to fight in my world… Son, whoever gave you your courage, you should slap the piss out of, because the hell I’m going to put you through will make you beg to the lords of the greater power’s themselves for forgiveness.”

 

"YEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!"

 

"Kid...if you..."

 

 

"WOAH WOAH WOAH!"

 

"BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!"

 

Suddenly, the unmistakeable voice of Landon Maddix echoes through the arena...no, sorry...stadium. Not long after, the man himself steps out onto the stage in his street clothes. Very expensive street clothes, mind you. Around his waist is his newly acquired SWF ICTV Championship, displayed proudly, perhaps not for long. Meanwhile, Jay Dawg smiles wryly, as Maddix glares down the aisle at The Hardcore Maniac.

 

"Excuse...ME!" snaps Landon, as if audtioning for a part in Will and Grace. "I'm so sorry to interrupt this touching, tear-jerking moment. But puh-lease, give me and this crowd a break from this bleeding hearts CRAP!"

 

"LANDON SUCKS! LANDON SUCKS! LANDON SUCKS!"

 

"Shut the hell up while I'm talking!"

 

"BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!"

 

"Drazon...I have got to admit, that was very impressive. Very impressive. Heck, you nearly made even me believe you were a somebody for a moment. But, that's not strictly true now, is it? You said it yourself...you've made numerous returns and each one of them has failed. You..."

 

"What the hell is your point?"

 

"My point? My point is Drazon, I'm not in a good mood right now. I haven't been in a good mood for days. In fact, I haven't been in a good mood since I got the phone call telling me that I had to defend MY newly won ICTV Championship against you. Don't get me wrong. I've got no problem with defending my title against you. The questions that's bugging me is...what exactly have you done to warrant a shot at the title? You've been gone for months, make sporadic returns...and suddenly, you're first in line for a shot at this piece of gold? Who the hell did you suck off to get that honour!?!"

 

"WoooooOOOOOAAAAHHHHHH!!!"

 

Riley: "That's a good point when you think about it..."

 

Comet: "Oh it is not!"

 

Drazon almost loses his temper at that last comment, but manages to keep his composure somehow. Landon on the other hand has all but lost it.

 

"Come on Drazon! Answer me that? Look at the talent in this company. Toxxic...two time ICTV Champion. The Masked Man...USJL Champion. Alan Clark...he's beaten me before. Hell, Johnny Dangerous has been begging for a shot at this belt for weeks. And suddenly you waltz back in...and before you know it, I'm getting STUCK...in a BOILER ROOM...with some hardcore FREAK!"

 

"If you've got a problem with it kid..." sneers Jay Dawg. "...there's still time to back out."

 

"You're kidding...right? You think I'm just going to hand you this belt!?! You think I'm gonna be doing you under the table favours like that punk Zenon!?!"

 

Comet: "Well, I guess it's official. Landon Maddix has lost his mind."

 

Indeed, Maddix is on the verge of losing it...and realises the state he's in. Almost in embarrassment Maddix stops, takes a couple of deep breaths and tries to regain his composure.

 

"I'm not afraid of you Drazon..."

 

Jay Dawg looks up the ramp...and laughs.

 

"Really?"

 

"I'm not afraid of you..."

 

"You damn well should be! You say I don't deserve this title shot? Well, we'll just see, won't we. But the fact remains, whever I should be getting this shot or not...I AM getting this shot. But not only that. I'm getting it in my environment. Inside of a Boiler Room. And without wanting to sound too big headed, let's face it kid...if I can step into a Boiler Room and beat an SWF legend like TNT within an inch of his life, then want chance do you have of surviving?"

 

Drazon laughs again and suddenly Maddix doesn't look quite so cock-sure of himself. In fact he looks decidedly worried, as he drops the microphone and walks off to the back, still pointing a threatening finger Jay Dawg's way. Meanwhile "Dope Hat" hits again, and Jay Dawg holds his hands into the air, soaking up the cheers of the crowd.

 

Riley: "What a jerk..."

 

Comet: "That jerk could be just hours away from being our next SWF ICTV Champion. And from the look of fear we saw on Landon Maddix's face, I wouldn't bet against The Hardcore Maniac."

 

Riley: "If he wins...it'll be a travesty."

 

Comet: "Well, that's your opinion, which as usual doesn't seem worth a dime. Let's go to a quick break..."

[the.weej 0]

Card:

 

RIDICULOUS DEBUT AGAINST TWO ESTABLISHED VETERANS!!

Munich vs. Manson vs. Rob Gilbert

~ Rob Gilbert’s debut match is… against two guys who have been in this fed since I was born. Wow. In theory, he’d be doomed… but a win here really could impress the bookers backstage. Quite a bit. An out-of-character note to Munich and Manson: If you do not show, you will die. That is all.

Rules: Triple-threat rules. First man to get a pin or submission wins. I’m confused as to what the DQ/count-out rules are in a typical triple-threat, but… well, just don’t end your match in a DQ. Simple enough.

 

NEWBIE GETS CHANCE TO BOUNCE OFF OF LOSS BY FIGHTING A MAN IN A PENGUIN SUIT!!

Heath Black vs. Petey the Irish Penguin

~ Newbie Heath Black lost his debut match here in the SWF, but he has a chance to redeem himself here by fighting a… man in a giant penguin suit. Yeah, don’t ask.

Rules: Standard.

 

NEWBIE GETS CHANCE TO CONTINUE WINNING STREAK BY FIGHTING FORMER REFEREE!!

"The Icon" Max King vs. Ced Ordonez

~ Max King won his first match. Can he win his second?? This match has been built up for MONTHS and now this epic feud is finally ready to be blown off!! WHO WILL WIN??

Rules: Standard.

 

CRUISERWEIGHT TITLE DEFENSE ALREADY?? CRAAAAAZY!!

Martin “Big Country” Hunt vs. Austin Sly©

~ Hunt won his first match here in the SWF in impressive fashion, and… just on an impulse, if you will, he’s IMMEDIATELY been given a shot at the newly-crowned SWF Cruiserweight Champion!! Wowza! Both men are in a very good way right now in the SWF, coming off of two pretty important victories, but only one can continue their streak. Which man will it be? There’s only one way to find out. BATTLE!

Rules: Cruiserweight Rules.

 

HARDCORE TITLE SHOT CASH-IN!!

Ryan Dustin vs. Mike Van Siclen©

~ MVS is coming off a pretty hard loss at the hands of Danny Williams from the last show, but Dustin’s got a title shot, and he wants that shot now. hArDK0Re.

Rules: Uh, none. Duh.

 

#1 CONTENDERSHIP FOR SWF WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT TITLE!!

“Deathwish” Danny Williams vs. Toxxic

~ Since Tom was supposed to compete against Janus tonight for the World Title, these two were supposed to be competing to see who was next in line for the title. But, since things have turned out the way they have… this is to decide who gets to compete in DOUBLE #1 COMPETITOR WACKINESS~! for the World Title. Hurray at Zed throwing a wrench into the World Title shot machine.

Rules: Standard.

 

ICTV CHAMPION IS IMMEDIATELY SENTENCED TO DEATH IN BOILER ROOM BRAWL!!

Jay Dawg vs. Landon "La Cucaracha" Maddix©

~ One might say “Oh, huzzah! Maddix is our new ICTV Champ! He deserves rest!” But I might punch one out. Ohohohoho. Rest is for sissies. Fighting the most hardcore competitor to ever grace the SWF in a Boiler Room Brawl is for REAL men. Good luck.

Rules: I think you both know this one. Both men start out in the boiler room of the stadium, and kill eachother. But the killing should slowly work its way towards the ring, and whoever enters the ring and collects the ICTV belt from referee Anthony Michael Hall first is the winner, and the champion. For stadium lay-out and whatnot… be creative.

 

TOM CASHES IN ON TITLE SHOT… JANUS SUSPENDED… FIGHTS JOHNNY DANGEROUS INSTEAD!!

“The Superior One” Tom Flesher vs. Johnny Dangerous

~ Tom was all set to go on his #1 contendership for the World Title tonight, but unfortunately, the World champion himself has been temporarily suspended. The obvious replacement, of course, was… Johnny Dangerous. Some might question this line of thinking, seeing as how Dangerous is coming off of a loss to Austin Sly for his Cruiserweight Title here, and Tom’ll probably be pretty ticked off that he’s not getting the title shot that’s rightfully his, but… well, let’s just see what happens. This should be interesting.

Rules: Standard Singles Match. Excitement.

[the.weej 0]

Comet: Coming up in our first match of the night, the debut of Rob Gilbert, against two SWF veterans who are hungry for a victory.

 

Riley: I’m already impressed with him.

 

Comet: But, he hasn’t done anything yet. He’ll be dealing with two wrestlers who are seasoned veterans.

 

Riley: Or, in other words, they’ve been here for a long time.

 

Comet: We’ll see if Gilbert has enough to get past these two guys.

 

Riley: I’m sure he will, this isn’t a 30 hornet, 30,000 bee situation, this will be competitive.

 

Comet: Definitely. Three wrestlers. One fall. Nobody wants take home the loser’s share of the purse tonight.

 

Riley: Manson and Munich are both wrestling with a point to prove, since they were beaten easily just five days ago.

 

Comet: showings like that will definitely cause you to go from the SWF to oblivion. Let’s go to the ring.

 

We cut to the ring where we see Funyon standing.

 

"Serial Thrilla” by Prodigy plays as Rob Gilbert walks though the curtains followed by his bodyguard/trainer Mitch Duncan.

 

“Introducing first, accompanied to the ring by his bodyguard and trainer Mitch Duncan, hailing from Chappaqua, New York; weighing in at 165 pounds.. ROB GILBERT!”

 

Gilbert ignores the fans as he gets on the apron, and enters the ring as his trainer has the ropes opened for him. Gilbert then holds up his left hand and goes to his corner.

 

Riley: He’s got his game-face on. He’s ready for this.

 

Comet: This is his first match. We don’t know if he has a gameface yet.

 

The house lights dim and multi-colored strobes flash as "Snap Your Fingers, Snap Your Neck" by Prong hits to the ovation of the fans.

 

“Introducing next.. from Denver, Colorado; weighing in at 220 pounds, MANSON!”

 

Manson emerges, heads straight down the ramp and rolls into the ring. Upon standing he immediately heads to his corner where he waits on his opponent.

 

Comet: Manson’s looking for some redemption here.

 

“Gimme Shelter” by The Rolling Stones kicks up on the PA, and out saunters Munich… wearing a black t-shirt and his normal attire. Inside Munich's shirt, there's a pack of cigarettes.

 

“Introducing last.. from Dallas, Texas, weighing in at 260 pounds, MUNICH!”

 

At the top of the ramp, Munich takes the cigarettes out of his pocket and places them vertically on the ramp.

 

Riley: Doesn’t he know those things stunt your growth?

 

Munich lifts the shirt off over his head and throws it onto the steel. He then makes a quick walk to the ring, slides under the bottom rope, and goes about doing warm exercises in the ring.

 

Comet: All three of these men have points to prove and all three men want to move up the ladder here in the SWF.

 

*DING DING DING*

 

The three men walk towards the center of the ring. Rob Gilbert extends his hands to offer both wrestlers a handshake. But then he moves his hands though his hair and struts. Munich and Manson show no amusement at this and Gilbert gestures for Munich and Manson to start the match. Gilbert starts walking slowly to the corner, but both men grab him and whip him towards the ropes. They hit Gilbert with a double clothesline, and then they both drop elbows on Gilbert. Manson picks up Gilbert and hits him with a kneelift, followed by an overhead belly-to-belly suplex. Gilbert slumps down on the mat and appears to be dead meat. Before someone can make a cover on Gilbert, Mitch Duncan pulls him out of the ring and hands him a bottle of water.

 

Comet: Oh come on! This is his debut, and he needs water?

 

Riley: Hey, you can’t overheat during a match, trust me Comet. Heatstroke is no laughing matter.

 

Munich attempts a kick, but Manson catches his foot and gives him a dragon screw. Manson then attempts a knee drop, but Munich gets out of the way. Munich gets up and punches Manson as he gets back onto his feet. Munich whips Manson into the ropes but Manson comes back with a spinning elbow to the face. Rob Gilbert rolls into the ring, ignored by the other two wrestlers in the match. Manson gives Munich a knee-lift and a snap suplex. Rob Gilbert walks over to Munich and attempts an elbow drop, but Munich rolls out of the way. Manson then picks up Gilbert and gives him a chop to the chest, followed by three more chops, Gilbert then does a 'Flair Flop,' falling face first on the canvas. Munich grabs a leg and applies a half-crab. Manson breaks that up by hitting Munich with a knee to the face. Manson grabs Munich and gives him a back-breaker. Meanwhile, Gilbert crawls to a corner and pulls himself to his feet. Manson is picking up Munich as Gilbert charges in and hits Manson with an elbow to the back.

 

Riley: This is history! That’s the first move he's ever executed

 

Comet: an elbow to the back is not a wrestling move

 

Manson doesn't move an inch as Gilbert starts strutting again. Manson chops him across the chest again and Gilbert drops to his knees to plead for mercy. Manson shakes his head as Gilbert gets back up on his feet. Gilbert holds his arms out and gestures for a test of strength. Manson extends his left arm and Gilbert kicks him in the gut. Manson doesn’t move, Gilbert irish whips Manson into the ropes. Gilbert attempts a dropkick and misses because Manson held onto the ropes. Gilbert rolls back onto his feet and starts to kick at Manson. Munich takes Gilbert down to the canvas with a clothesline.

 

Gilbert rolls onto his knees and starts to beg for mercy in front of Manson. Gilbert attempts to follow this up with a low blow, but Manson pulls him up by his hair and gives him a DDT. Which he follows with a cover.

 

One!

 

Munich drops an elbow on Manson to break up the cover. Munich picks up Manson and lifts him up high for a hanging vertical suplex, holding Manson in the air and he drops him on the mat. Rob Gilbert walks towards Manson and hits a knee drop. Gilbert pulls Manson up by his hair, slapping him around in the process, and Gilbert bodyslams him onto the mat. After that move, Gilbert starts to strut once again, but his strut is interrupted by Munich hitting the Guilty Pleasure on him. Munich goes for a cover.

 

One!

 

Manson breaks the cover with a stomp to Munich. Manson unleashes kicks to the midsection of Munich and goes for a power bomb. Munich counters with a back body drop. Gilbert approaches Munich from behind and executes a takedown on him. Gilbert applies a headlock on Munich and starts to rub the top of his head with his fist while smiling widely. Gilbert continues his atomic noogie variation of the headlock for a few seconds, but Munich lifts Gilbert up and executes a backdrop on him. Manson gives Munich a backdrop of his own. Rob Gilbert charges over and hits the ‘Discus Elbow’ to Manson, which barely takes him down to a knee. Gilbert starts to strut for a second and Gilbert assumes the Crane Pose with his left leg up in the air in front of Manson.

 

Riley: He knows Karate! Kung-fu Robbie!

 

Manson just hits him in the right leg and takes him down to the mat.

 

Comet: He should ask his sensei for a refund.

 

Manson picks up Gilbert and hits him with a German suplex.

 

One! Two!

 

Munich breaks the pin. Munich then hits an inverted atomic drop on Manson, followed by figure-four leg lock. Rob Gilbert struts and hits an elbow drop on Manson while he’s in the hold. Manson is able to extend his arms out to reach the ropes and Munich releases the hold. Gilbert swoops in and hits a gut-wrench suplex on Manson. Gilbert does a short strut and continues to kick Manson in the midsection. Gilbert goes for a reverse neck breaker, but Munich blocks it and starts to punch Gilbert in the face. Munich hits an inverted atomic drop on Gilbert. Munich follows this up with a figure-four leglock on Gilbert. Gilbert begins to scream loudly while in this hold. Manson breaks up the hold with a knee drop. Manson hits Munich with a spinebuster, depositing him on the mat and goes for a cover.

 

One! Tw..

 

Kickout!

 

Gilbert walks to Manson and taps him on the back, and when Manson turns around. Gilbert applies the dreaded Iron Claw!

 

Riley: I’ve heard that Gilbert’s a master of his move!

 

Comet: I haven't seen the claw in years, so you might be right

 

Manson counters the claw quickly by elbowing Gilbert in the face. Manson then kicks Gilbert in the midsection and hits him with a power bomb, which he follows with a cover.

 

One! Two!

 

Munich breaks the cover. Munich picks up Gilbert and executes a reverse DDT. Munich and Manson then start to fight. Munich sets Manson up for a reverse DDT, but Manson counters with a slam. Gilbert begins to dig though his tights and Mitch Duncan gets on the apron to protest, distracting the referee. Gilbert puts brass knuckles, and he hits Manson in the face with them, which knocks him down onto the canvas. Gilbert follows that up by hitting Munich in the face with the knucks and then he puts them away in his tights. Gilbert drags Manson and Munich to the center of the ring and makes it look like they knocked each other down with a clothesline. Duncan steps off of the apron and the ref turns around to count.

 

One! Two!

 

Gilbert breaks the pin. Gilbert lifts up Manson off of the canvas, drops him on the ropes, and suplexes him over with the Slingshot Suplex. Gilbert goes for a cover.

 

One!

 

Manson kicks out with authority. Gilbert executes the DDT on Manson, but before he can cover, Munich attacks him from behind. Munich hits him with punches. Munich then hits a Fisherman’s Suplex.

 

One! Two!

 

Manson breaks the pin. Manson lifts up Gilbert and hits him with a Spinebuster. Munich picks up Gilbert and executes the Stungun on him, dropping him throat first across the top rope. Gilbert rolls out of the ring after this move to compose himself. Manson elbows Munich in the face. Manson powerbombs Munich. Manson steps up onto the second turnbuckle and he goes for a leg drop. But before he lands, Munich rolls out of the way. Munich hits a fisherman’s suplex on Manson.

 

One! Two!

 

Manson kicks out! Munich hits a swinging neckbreaker on Manson. Munich goes up onto the top rope and he flies off with the Leap of Cynicism, followed by a cover.

 

One!

 

Two!

 

Manson kicks out again. Munich attempts an Inverted Atomic Drop, but Manson counters with a belly to belly suplex. Manson lifts up Munich and hits a shoulder-breaker. Manson hits a kneedrop on Munich as Rob Gilbert rolls back into the ring.

 

Comet: About time he rejoined this match.

 

Riley: Hey, this is a smart plan, let the other guys destroy themselves.

 

Gilbert ambushes Manson from behind with a bulldog. Gilbert lifts Manson up in a suplex and drops him face-first on the mat with the Gourdbuster. Gilbert maneuvers himself behind Manson and applies a Camel Clutch. Manson easily powers out of the camel clutch, charging backwards into the corner with Gilbert on his back, smashing Gilbert into the turnbuckles. Gilbert falls face first back onto the mat. Manson picks Gilbert up and throws him into the corner. Munich and Manson start to fight for a few moments as Gilbert gets onto the top turnbuckle. Manson turns his attention back to Gilbert and Gilbert locks him in a front face lock, but Manson blocks his tornado DDT and counters it with a Northern Lights Suplex, pinning Gilbert’s shoulders on the mat.

 

One!

 

Two!

 

Munich breaks the pin. Munich kicks Manson in the midsection and puts Manson’s head between his legs, but Manson counters with a back body drop. Manson follows up with a knee drop. Manson picks up Munich and Munich counters with a small package.

 

One!

 

Two!

 

Manson kicks out. Gilbert attempts a backslide on Munich but he blocks it and forearms Gilbert in the face. Munich turns his attention to Manson, but Gilbert clips him in the leg. Gilbert clips him again and Munich falls on his back. Gilbert grabs Munich’s legs and ‘wishbones’ them. Gilbert kicks Munich in the knee. Manson elbows Gilbert in the face and whips him towards the ropes. Gilbert grabs onto the ropes and flings himself onto the floor feet-first. Manson follows up by coming though the ropes with a suicide dive. But Mitch Duncan steps in front of Gilbert and catches Manson in his arms

 

Comet: Come on, that’s interference.

 

Riley: Well, it’s an intervention, he’s doing it to protect Manson, and Gilbert

 

Duncan puts Manson down on his feet, and as Manson pursues Duncan, Gilbert comes up from behind and drops him back-first on the floor with a Russian legsweep. Gilbert steps on to the apron and drops an elbow to the chest of Manson before rolling back into the ring. Gilbert taunts Manson and Munich runs over to hit him with Guilty Pleasure. Munich goes for a cover near the ropes.

 

One! Two!

 

Gilbert puts his foot on the ropes. Gilbert gets up and wraps his arms around Munich’s left knee. Gilbert tries to move behind Munich, but Munich stomps on him, making him break the hold. Manson re-enters the ring, and him and Munich whip Gilbert into the corner. Manson charges in and hits Gilbert with a knee to the mid-section. Manson follows up with a spinning Fisherman’s Suplex. Munich starts kicking Manson and whips him into the ropes. Munich goes for the left hook, but Manson hits him with a baseball slide. Munich is left on his knees, and Manson hits a low roundhouse kick to his face.

 

Gilbert approaches Manson from behind, hitting him in the kidney-area, followed by an Atomic drop. Gilbert gives Manson a spinebuster in the middle of the ring. Gilbert goes onto the top rope and hits a flying elbow drop on Manson. Gilbert makes a cover.

 

One!

 

Two!

 

Manson kicks out. Gilbert pulls Manson up to his feet by his hair, but then Manson kicks him in the midsection and DDTs Gilbert. Munich approaches Manson, but Manson knees him in the midsection. Manson hits Munich with a power bomb, but Rob Gilbert comes up from behind Manson and applies a sleeperhold. Manson counters with a bell clap. After that counter, Gilbert falls face first on the mat. Munich gets back onto his feet and he applies a full-nelson to Manson, lifting him up for a Dragon Suplex and a pin.

 

One!

 

Two!

 

Manson kicks out. Gilbert attempts an Irish Whip into the corner on Munich, but he reverses and whips Gilbert into the corner. Gilbert manages to perch himself on the second turnbuckle as Munich charges in, and he hits a Tornado DDT on Munich. Gilbert walks towards the corner as Munich is down. As he gets onto the top turnbuckle, Manson goes for a cover.

 

One!

 

Two!

 

Gilbert breaks up the cover by hitting a Frog Splash. Gilbert clutches his stomach in pain and falls to the mat. Manson kicks Gilbert in the midsection and gives him a snap suplex. Munich attacks Manson from behind and gives him a reverse DDT. Gilbert attempts to go on the offensive by pulling on Munich’s hair, but Munich doesn’t budge and he clotheslines Gilbert to the mat. Manson hits Munich from behind with a knee. Manson kicks Munich in the midsection and sets him up for a power bomb. Gilbert rolls Manson up with a school boy pin

 

One!

 

Two!

 

Manson kicks out. Gilbert still celebrates with a strut.

 

Comet: I hate that strut.

 

Manson hits Gilbert with a spinning elbow and Gilbert flies though the ropes, landing on the apron. Munich approaches Manson from behind and whips him towards the ropes. Munich goes for a clothesline but Manson ducks it and they run towards the ropes. Manson goes for a clothesline but Munich ducks. They both run off of the ropes again and Manson hits Munich with a kneelift. Gilbert rolls back into the ring and charges after Manson. Manson responds by kneelifting Gilbert.

 

Comet: Kneelifts for everybody!

 

Manson yanks Gilbert up by his hair and hits him with Consequences. He goes for a cover.

 

 

One!

 

 

Two!

 

 

Munich breaks up the pin. Munich and Manson exchange punches. Manson sets up Consequences on Munich, but Munich shoves him away. Munich then kicks Manson in the midsection and sets up for the C-4 Crunch. Manson hits him with a back body drop but Munich holds on and rolls him over with a Sunset Flip.

 

One!

 

Two!

 

Manson kicks out. Manson gets to his feet and chops Munich on the chest. Munich replies with a chop. Manson chops Munich again and whips him into the corner. Manson charges in and Munich hits him with the left hook, which knocks him against the ropes. Gilbert staggers back onto his feet and attempts to lift Manson over the ropes but Munich grabs Gilbert and kicks him in the midsection.

 

Comet: C-4 CRUNCH TO ROB GILBERT! GOODBYE!

 

ONE!

 

TWO!

 

Manson breaks up the cover with an double ax handle to Munich. Manson whips Munich into the ropes and clotheslines him. Manson drops an elbow on the limp body of Rob Gilbert. Munich gets back to his feet and drops an elbow on Gilbert. Munich grabs Gilbert’s right leg and Manson grabs the other leg. Both of them gesture as to ask for approval, and then they ‘wishbone’ Gilbert. Manson turns the tide by attacking Munich from behind and elbowing him in the face. Meanwhile, Duncan is dragging Gilbert’s limp body out of the ring. Duncan applies smelling salts to Gilbert. But the referee ejects Duncan from ringside. Duncan walks off as Gilbert is regaining his senses.

 

Riley: What did he do?

 

Comet: Interfere in this match multiple times. Let’s settle this with these three men.

 

Manson hits an STO on Munich. Manson kneedrops Munich and then picks him up, setting him up for Consequences. Gilbert rolls back into the ring and taunts Manson. Manson chooses to charge towards Gilbert and Gilbert flops face-first onto the mat before any contact is made. Manson shakes his head and turns his attention back towards Munich, but Gilbert gets on his knees and trips Manson from behind. Gilbert smirks and does a roll up on Manson. But Munich breaks the pin before a count could be made. Munich slams Gilbert and lifts him into a sitting position.

 

Suddenly, Munich hits the Bamboozle on Gilbert. Gilbert slumps limply onto the mat. Manson hits another kneelift on Munich. Munich then executes a back body drop on Manson. Rob Gilbert is in a corner, putting a black glove onto his left hand. Manson gets back onto his feet and Munich charges over and clotheslines Gilbert to the mat. Munich then kicks Manson in the midsection and pulls him between his legs.

 

Comet: C-4 CRUNCH TO MANSON! This one might be over!

 

Riley: No, Robzilla’s attacking Munich. This might be his finisher!

 

Comet: He hit Munich in the back of the head with that black glove and the ref didn’t see it!

 

Riley: Straight out of Chappaqua! This is over!

 

Comet: Gilbert with a cover.

 

 

 

ONE!

 

 

 

TWO!

 

 

 

THREE!

 

Comet: And Rob Gilbert wins his SWF debut, though the use of what I hear is a loaded glove

 

Riley: Loaded glove? Come on! Who loads a glove anyways? Who’s to say he had a glove on?

 

Comet: You should get your eyes checked.

 

Riley: Anyways, the important point is that Robzilla wins his debut. Munich and Manson will go home disappointed, and with the losers share of the purse.

 

Comet: Let’s move on

[the.weej 0]

HEATH BLACK vs PETEY

 

Or not. I should read all my PMs before I post anything -- apparently, this is a DNS. Wish I'd found that out sooner -- we all like a good Ebony cameo, don't we?

Edited June 29, 2004 by realitycheck

[the.weej 0]

Video package time, as the voice of Leonard Nemoy echoes the words that happen to appear in italics.

 

The Masked Man. His name alone invokes awe.

 

*Masked Man makes his entrance at 13th Hour, accompanied by Bob Saget, Dave Coulier, and John Stamos*

 

The Masked Man. A mysterious figure with a mysterious past that he hides even from himself.

 

*TMM leaps off the turnbuckle with a legdrop to the back of Aecas' head*

 

The Sexual Maskosaurus. A lethal combination of beauty, power, and death.

 

*Masked Man spikes Alan Clark onto his head with the reverse, inverted Cautionary Tale of Sexual Maskosaurus*

 

For weeks and weeks, or to be more accurate, never, The Masked Man fought on the side of good, terrorizing the evil community.

 

*In a residential neighborhood, Masked Man picks up a dead fetus and tosses it in the trashcan, before giving the camera a thumbs-up*

 

But like so many tragic heroes, he was seduced by the lure of the dark side.

 

*A slow motion shot of Masked Man pressing down on the Eggstractor, sending the sharp edge of an egg shell into a woman's eye*

 

He wrapped evil around him like a large, evil, Mexican serape.

 

*TMM punts Aecas square in the testicles*

 

He became a cold-blooded killer.

 

*Mask checks the pulse of the aforementioned woman, noticing that she is dead. He washes his hands in the sink*

 

Nobody was immune to his trail of destruction.

 

*Mask pantses Danny Williams*

 

Not friends...

 

*Masked Man slaps his former boss*

 

Not family...

 

*TMM shoves away his third cousin twice removed, Nick Soapdish, away, thrusting his newly won Triple Crown high in the air*

 

Not even the most pacifist and logical of races

 

*A shot of the Masked Man squaring off against Spock himself. Mask nails him with a forearm smash, but the Vulcan shakes it off and shoves him away, extending his arm out...and locking in the Vulcan Death Grip! But no! TMM turns on him and pins his arm behind him as he points his newly-revealed knife at Spock's chest*

 

"What the hell are you talking about?"

 

It's not a video package anymore; we're inside a locker room in the lovely Rosenblatt Stadium in Omaha, Nebraska, as The Masked Man (with JUST the United States Championship on his shoulder) and one of his female agents watch the video screen. The woman has just spoken up, and TMM, still amazed by his brilliant video package, finally turns in shock to the agent as she continues.

 

"I thought you killed a volcanologist."

 

Masked Man lets out a chuckle.

 

"Silly, silly, silly Jessica. Why would I kill someone who studied Vulcans?"

 

"He studied volcanoes. He was a professor."

 

A pause. Masked Man keeps his head high and sighs.

 

"Ah, yes. Well, regardless..."

 

"Mask, you can't show this! It's embellished to the fullest extent!"

 

"It is not embellished in the slightest, my dear Jessica. This is all true...except for that possible word misunderstanding. The world needs to know exactly who I am. After all, I am the SWF United States Champion."

 

"Isn't it the Triple Crown?"

 

"That is why I called this oafish, slightly unattractive cameraman in the room, Jessica! I am here to tell all of the fans, staff, and wrestlers that the Triple Crown is no longer. Monseiur Landon Maddix created the name as a fine ego-stroking tool. However, he lost the title to Alan Clark, and now, the name 'Triple Crown' still reeks of that pissant. In addition, I have not forgotten the lineage and prestige of the United States Championship, and despite the fact that I despise everything in this country with the exception of Orofino, I will acknowledge it with this title."

 

"Are you done?"

 

"I am."

 

"Good. We ran over; we're going to be fined by Zenon."

 

"Blast!"

[the.weej 0]

"Cruiserweight time! Cruiserweight time!"

 

"What in the name of Caesar's ghost are you rambling on about Riley? Since when are you so excited about the Cruiserweight Championship?"

 

We sit at ringside with the Smark Wrestling Federation's resident announcing team made up of Cyclone Comet and Bobby Riley. Presently, Riley is sitting giddy in the driver’s seat of the show with Comet playing passenger. Comet gives a perplexed look to his partner, perhaps wondering why his mood is suddenly so joyful.

 

"I've been excited about the Cruiserweight Champion since a few seconds after that wanna-be spy Johnny Dangerous lost it to the ever-so-talented Austin Sly. The entire Cruiserweight division is suddenly more exciting now that it has a true champion at the helm. Seventy days, Comet. That's how long Johnny held onto the title." Riley adds a biter tone to his voice. "Seventy days. That's longer than William Henry Harrison was president of the United States!"

 

"It was quite an impressive run if I must say so myself, Bobby." Comet says, beaming with pride.

 

"Shut up you masked blunder! The simple fact that someone with as little talent as Johnny Dangerous could be champion for so long is disgraceful! Thank Todd that Austin came along and saved it away from him."

 

"Citizen Dangerous was a fighting champion, its not like he didn't give plenty of people chances to take the title away from him. And it was difficult for even Citizen Sly to eventually dethrone him."

 

"... to eventually dethrone him," Riley repeats Comet mocking him. "Blah blah blah on to bigger and better things I say. Tonight the new Cruiserweight Champion Austin Sly takes on a new wrestler here in the SWF Martin "Big Country" Hunt! You see that kids, just get an SWF contract and maybe you can get an almost instant title shot!"

 

"You're a bitter little man, Riley." Cyclone comments, shaking his head.

 

"Who are you calling little, Comet? Last time I checked, spandex wasn't the most flattering of materials."

 

Riley and Comet share an awkward moment of silence before Funyon finally makes it into the ring.

 

"Well... Riley... looks like our match is starting."

 

"Indeed it is Comet."

 

The preacher man says it's the end of time

And the Mississippi River she's a goin' dry

The interest is up and the Stock Markets down

And you only get mugged

If you go down town

 

The opening lines to "A Country Boy Can Survive" by Hank Williams Jr. fills the arena to announce the arrival of Martin "Big Country" Hunt. He swaggers down to the ring tossing insults at fan members trying to gather a little cheap heat before entering the ring.

 

"Ladies and gentlemen," Funyon starts his first introduction; "the following match is to be contested under cruiserweight rules and is for the Smarks Wrestling Federation Cruiserweight Championship! Making his way to the ring first from Boone, North Carolina, weighing in at two hundred and twenty pounds... he is Martiiiin "Big Country" Huuuunt!"

 

"Wait... Comet... what the hell is this music?" Riley shouts, covering his ears.

 

"I believe its called 'country music', Riley. Hank Williams Jr. if I'm not mistaken."

 

"Make it stop! I think my ears are bleeding! Help me Comet! You're supposed to fight evil, go find whoever is playing this song and make them pay!" Riley looks around the arena. "Oh my Todd, we're in Nebraska! They're enjoying this music! Save me Comet!"

 

Once in the ring, Martin walks over to chat with referee Soapdish for a second before he leans onto the ropes waiting for his opponent. The lights in the Rosenblatt Stadium change to a dark shade of blue while the sound of an acoustic guitar floats through the air. Austin Sly emerges from the back with a calm strut holding his Cruiserweight title in the air with his right hand for everyone to see. He stops momentarily at the edge of the ramp soaking up the attention from the fans. The lights in the arena begin to flash as Austin motions his free hand behind him as if to tell someone to follow him. Sure enough, NTD emerges from behind the curtains (wearing no pants, as always) and follows him down the ramp towards the ring.

 

"Making his way to the ring accompanied by Smarks Wrestling Federation Legend NTD from St. Louis, Missouri, weighing in at two hundred and thirty pounds, he is the new Cruiserweight Champion... Auuustiiiiiin Sllyyyyy!"

 

Austin and NTD arrive at ringside together. NTD shares a few quick words of encouragement with his young protege before he's handed the Cruiserweight title belt and instructed to watch it for the new first time champion. The two take their leave of each other as the pantsless wonder makes his way to the opposite side of the ring where the announcers’ table stands. Austin remains at ringside stretching for a bit before he climbs into the ring to face his opponent. The two refuse to get close enough to each other to shake hands before the match starts so they just ring the bell to get underway.

 

Ding ding ding!!

 

Austin offers a fairly easy start to his younger and less experienced opponent by simply motioning to lock up. The two make their way towards the middle of the ring in order to be on equal grounds. Hunt is almost to the center of the ring before he puts his arms up to show he's ready to lock up. Austin however jumps back from his opponent and starts pointing at him accusing him of cheating already. Hunt goes on the defensive, assuring his opponent that he's done nothing wrong. With slight hesitance, Austin accepts his opponent’s explanation and agrees to grapple with him. The two lean in towards each other, but Austin just rakes Martin in the eyes causing the young man to shoot back in pain. The champion laughs at his opponent but doesn't make a move to attack him.

 

"This is the man that you want to represent the entire Cruiserweight division Riley?"

 

"Indeed it is. How can't you like Austin Sly? He's great!"

 

Martin spins around trying to hit Austin with a hard right hand but only connects with the air because Austin has ducked down beneath it. The champion runs underneath Martin's arm and pops up behind him to slap him in the back of the head before jumping back out of his way. Quickly becoming aggravated, Hunt spins back around just to see Austin doing his version of the bob and weave, hopping from side to side waiting for him. The challenger throws several punches but none of them meet their target as Austin weaves away from him. As Hunt comes in faster, Austin ducks down beneath his arm and drops his opponent to the mat with a drop toehold. The champion bounces up off the mat and rubs his foot against the back of Big Country's head before retreating again to a safe distance. Austin once again Martin bangs his fist on the mat before climbing back to his feet. Austin provokes Martin into taking a swing at him again, but this time the champion ducks under the punch and sends a shot of his own into his opponent’s midsection. The strength of the punch makes Martin cry out in pain and bend over just enough that Austin is able to grab him by his hair and slam him backwards onto the mat.

 

Thud.

 

Hunt lands on the mat with a dull thud. Austin places his foot firmly on top of his downed opponent's chest and tells Soapdish to count.

 

One!

 

 

Two! No! Martin kicks out before a two count. Well, not so much kicked out as just shoved Austin's foot off his chest. Having lost his sense of balance, Sly stumbles about the ring a little before falling to one knee to recover. Martin see's this as an opportunity and quickly jumps for his opponent, knocking both men down in the process. Big Country ends up on top of Austin giving him a clear opportunity to send several shots to his opponent's head. Austin has no luck trying to block the punches being thrown towards his face so he instead uses his size and leg strength to roll Hunt off the top of him.

 

"This doesn't look very good for the champion!" Comet remarks simply to draw Riley's attention, "Citizen Hunt is coming charging back with a vengeance!"

 

"No he's not, Comet. Never say that again!"

 

Austin climbs to his feet trying to recover, but the tenacious rookie climbs up with him and sends his shoulder flying into Austin's midsection with a ferocious spear...

 

Thump!

 

... through the middle ropes and onto the floor! The force of the blow knocks Austin out of the ring while Martin just wasn't lucky enough to come to a stop and rolled through the ropes himself. The crowd is astonished as there is an audible gasp from the crowd followed by chanting!

 

"Ho-ly shit!"

 

"Ho-ly shit!"

 

"Ho-ly shit!"

 

NTD runs to the side of the ring where the two exited to check on his friend. They share a few words before NTD heads back away, careful not to touch Martin and earn a disqualification. Soapdish starts his count.

 

One!

 

Neither man moves.

 

Two!

 

Hunt begins to stir but doesn't climb to his feet.

 

Three!

 

Hunt has made it to his knees as Austin begins to stir.

 

Four!

 

Hunt is on his feet and Austin has made it onto his knees.

 

Five!

 

Martin grabs Austin by the hair in order to pull him to his feet before attempting to Irish whip the champion into the ring steps. Unfortunately for any Big Country fans, Austin reverses the Irish whip and sends Martin's knees crashing into the steps instead.

 

Six!

 

Austin stays on the same side of the ring that Martin is now bent over the stairs and jogs over to the far fan wall beside the entrance ramp.

 

Seven!

 

Austin runs and jumps on the ring apron. He somehow keeps forward movement while struggling to keep his balance only to land a leg drop onto the steel steps just moments after Martin has moved out of the way.

 

Clang!

 

Eight!

 

The champ rolls off the steps and onto the mat where he immediately grabs his leg and winces in pain. Martin uses this time to gather his wits about him.

 

Nine!

 

Hunt walks over to the champion and begins to stomp on his leg and knee trying to ware him down while they're still outside of the ring.

 

Ten!

 

Martin pulls the champion to his feet and rolls him into the ring.

 

Eleven!

 

Martin re-enters the ring only to climb on top of Austin for the pin attempt.

 

One!

 

 

 

Two!

 

Austin gets his shoulder up after two! Martin keeps the pressure on the champ by kicking his sore leg a few times for good measure after the failed pin attempt. Austin slowly climbs to his feet trying not to put too much stress on his leg only to have them knocked out from under him by a shoulder block from the challenger.

 

"It looks like Citizen Hunt is trying to keep the champion grounded here. This is an excellent strategy."

 

"Why are you supporting him Comet? Did you not hear what he was saying to these fans on his way out here?" Riley questions his masked partner.

 

"We'll just call him the lesser of two evils. He can still be converted to fight for the side of good!"

 

The champion slowly climbs to his feet again only to be knocked down again with a shoulder block to the back of his knees. Austin yells out in pain as he comes crashing down onto the mat bouncing off of it with his back. Martin tries to capitalize by pinning Austin and hooking his legs back. Soapdish makes the count.

 

 

One!

 

 

 

 

NTD slaps his hand on the mat trying to rally Austin.

 

 

 

Two!

 

 

 

 

 

 

Th-nooooo! Kickout before three!

 

Austin's legs are obviously hurting him as he uses any free time he has in the ring to try and nurse them. Unfortunately for him, he gets very little time to himself as Martin continues applying pressure hoping that he might have a chance to win his first SWF title in only his second match in the federation. Hunt grabs Austin's leg and kicks him in the knee before uses his leverage on the leg in order to turn Austin over and try and lock on a half Boston crab. The champ is able to grab the bottom rope in order to force the hold to be broke. Sly also uses this opportunity to pull himself out of the ring and onto the floor. Austin hobbles around on his hurt leg a little before taking a seat on the ring steps. Hunt, showing his determination, slides out of the ring and hurries after Sly. Austin unexpectedly shoots off of the ring steps and hits a massive clothesline on his young opponent knocking him to the floor. Soapdish starts his twenty count again now that both men are on the floor outside of the ring.

 

One!

 

Neither man moves.

 

Two!

 

Three!

 

Martin begins to stir and actually makes it to his knees.

 

Four!

 

Both men begin to climb back to their feet.

 

Five!

 

Austin tries to work his way back into the match by bringing the fight to Martin with a right hook. Hunt fires one right back and we have a slugfest in the making!

 

Six!

 

Austin sends another right hand soaring into the side of his opponent’s face but has his momentum killed when Hunt kicks Austin's legs out from under him again.

 

Seven!

 

The rookie pulls Austin up by his hair and rolls him back into the ring shortly before following him back in.

 

"This young man is really taking it to Citizen Sly." Comet pauses to turn and face Riley, "looks like we might be crowning a new Cruiserweight Champion here tonight, Bobbo."

 

"No, Comet, there's still a lot of fight left in Austin. This isn't over yet."

 

"Looks like you might be right for once."

 

The announcers turn their attention back to the ring where Austin has caught Martin off guard when he was re-entering the ring with a shoulder block to his mid-section. Austin continues to work on Hunt's stomach by sending his shoulder repeatedly into the area. Martin stumbles backwards trying to escape the attack but only ends up backing his way into a corner that Austin follows him to. The champion promptly climbs to the second rope and begins sending right hand after right hand to Martin's head. After sending about eight right hands to Martin's head, Austin balances on the middle rope and allows his opponent to stumble out of the corner. The champ quickly climbs onto the top turnbuckle in order to launch himself off the ropes towards Martin. Austin grabs Martin's head on his way by hitting a picture perfect bulldog! The crowds gasps again before a few fans once again start a "Ho-ly shit!" chant. Sly quickly crawls on top of his opponent while calling for Soapdish to make the count.

 

One!

 

NTD turns his back to the ring and starts clapping fully expecting the match to be over now.

 

Two!

 

 

 

 

 

 

Three-noooo! Martin kicks out just barely before Soapdish's hand can slap the mat!

 

"It looked like Citizen Sly almost had won the match and held onto his Cruiserweight Championship after borrowing a move out of the recently departed Insane Luchador's playbook, but somehow this young man found the strength to kick out!"

 

Before Hunt has a chance to climb back to his feet, Austin quickly locks in a headlock in an attempt to keep his young opponent grounded. Hunt is able to gather enough strength to fight off the mat but Austin keeps him down with a couple of elbows to his back. Austin can't hold his opponent down for long as he eventually makes it to his knees and fights out of the hold by firing his own elbows into his opponents midsection. Gathering a head of steam, Martin bounces off of the ropes and unwillingly into the business end of another clothesline from the champion. Austin ignores his downed opponent and yells at NTD to get him a chair. Being the ever-faithful friend, NTD immediately runs to the announcers’ table and grabs one of the spare chairs that are always set up just in case they're needed. The pantsless wonder folds the chair up and slides it under the ring. Austin scoops up the chair and begins to tap it on the mat while shouting words of "encouragement" towards Martin trying to get him to climb to his feet.

 

"Citizen Sly might get himself disqualified here!" Comet shouts.

 

"Of course he might, but whats it matter to him? If he wins or gets DQed he still holds onto his title! I would just take the disqualification and walk off with the title here tonight." Riley smirks. "But that's just me, Comet. I guess you'd have a better idea?"

 

"If I were in the ring I'd"

 

"Is this going to end up another one of your 'truth and justice' speeches? If so, I think we can just skip it."

 

Soapdish, showing a bit of equality for once, repeatedly warns Austin about the use of a chair getting him disqualified. Paying no attention to the referee's warnings, Austin swings the chair back preparing to knock his opponent back down as soon as he makes it to his feet. While Martin climbs back onto his knees, Soapdish seizes the opportunity to grab the chair away from Austin who barely puts up a fight. With the referee's back turned, NTD throws the Cruiserweight Title belt into the ring but it falls too close to Martin who grabs it before Austin has a chance. Hunt holds the title in his hands just looking at it for a split second.

 

 

 

Thump!

 

 

 

Suddenly Austin just falls to the mat. Soapdish turns around to see the champion laying on the mat motionless and the challenger holding the belt in his hands and has no choice but to end the match! Hunt stands in shocked disbelief as Funyon makes the announcement.

 

"Ladies and Gentlemen, the match has been called due to disqualification, therefore your winner and still Smarks Wrestling Federation Cruiserweight Champion, Auuustiiiiiin Sllyyyyy!"

 

"Brilliant, Comet, just brilliant! That's the only word I can think of to describe what we have just witnessed. Mark my words, this match is going to go down in history." Riley pauses momentarily, "are you even listening to me Comet?"

 

"I can think of more than one word to describe what I just watched happen and 'brilliant' doesn't happen to be one of them."

 

Austin jumps up from the mat and grabs his title off the mat from where Hunt dropped it on his way out of the ring. NTD joins his friend inside the ring for a few brief moments of celebration before they make their way towards the back.

[the.weej 0]

We return to the ring now, "Bitch" by Meredith Brooks playing over the speakers, as Kelly Connelly makes her way towards the ring, wearing a nice, showy blue skirted business suit as she makes her way to the ring.

 

Comet: Citizen Kelly making her way to the ring, and it's obvious what this next match is going to be.

 

Riley: Oh yes, I've been waiting for this. We're about to see someone who quite frankly is able to improve the wrestling business just by his very presence, and that's Kelly's charge!

 

Kelly smirks to the camera as she walks towards the ring, moving her body in a very seductive way as she gets onto the apron, stepping through the ropes. She then grabs the mic away from Funyon rather quickly, not even giving him a chance to introduce her.

 

"Ladies and gentlemen, it's time for you all to be wowed and amazed. Tonight, it's time to see true excellence compete, and show why he is the best new thing to come into this federation in a LONG time. So everyone get up and cheer, because it's now time for the greatest, the one and only..."THE ICON"...MAX...KING!"

 

Explosions of pyro occur on the stage, followed by "Superstar" starting to play over the speakers. To a chorus of boos, out comes "The Icon" Max King...all smiles as he makes his way to the ring, ignoring the boos that he's receiving. Max makes a happy gesture with his hands to Kelly in the ring, and she is all smiles as she sits on the second rope. King walks with almost a bounce in his step.

 

Comet: Citizen King showing that he's got energy to spare, and he looks like he has no worries in this match.

 

Riley: Well, you DID see his last match, didn't you? King has all the potential to be the biggest new star in this federation, and he's got the moves to back up his words!

 

Comet: King in the ring now, and Kelly now seductively rubbing him. Apparently they think the ring is their personal room now.

 

Riley: Lucky Kelly. Er...I mean...

 

"NIGHT OF FIRE!"

 

"Night of Fire" by Niko starts playing as the lights dim, and the fireballs and dance routine of Ced begins. The female dancers and Ced begin their dance routine to delight the crowd, moving with the light show that illuminates them.

 

Comet: Citizen Ordonez enjoying himself out here, and he's not even in the ring yet!

 

Riley: But that's WHY he's enjoying himself right now, because he's NOT in the ring yet. Once he's in the ring, things will change rather quickly.

 

Ced and the girls finish their routine, and he breaks away from the group, going to the ring now.

 

Funyon: And his opponent, from Sacramento, California...weighing in at 209 pounds...The Bemani Cross Wizard...CED...ORDONEZ!

 

Ordonez slides into the ring now, as King glares a hole into him. Ordonez climbs up the ropes now, allowing the fans to get a good look at him. After a while, he motions back to his dance troupe, as they finish up, then smile, waving back to the backstage area now, and Ordonez jumps back down to the mat.

 

Comet: We're in for a potential classic here, Riley. Ordonez is a great flyer and leg submission artist, and if King's boasting is equal to his ring skills, then he's a good complement to Ced's style.

 

Riley: Of course, there's the one thing that you failed to mention...King's got a good size and strength advantage in this match. That could factor in...

 

*Ding Ding!*

 

After the ringing of the bell, King starts stalking Ced a bit, watching carefully at the masked wrestler. After a bit of circling each other, they lock up in a front grapple, fighting for control. King eventually uses his size advantage, and picks up Ced, and slams him down to the mat from the grapple position. Ced sits up, and Max flexes a bit to the crowd, a big smile on his face afterwards.

 

Riley: See what I was talking about Comet? King has this one in the bag!

 

Comet: Well, Kelly seems to think so out there...she's giggling like a schoolgirl.

 

King motions with his hands for Ced to get back up, to which the Bemani Cross Wizard does, rolling back up to his feet. King smiles, and motions for Ced to come back to the grapple. They lock up once again, King moving Ced to the corner, and once he gets him there seems to go for a clean break. King goes for a swing of a punch to Ced while he's in the corner, but Ced manages to duck out of the way, and once King turns back around, catches him right in the face with a roundhouse kick that catches The Icon HARD in the face. Ced then pulls King out of the corner with a headlock takedown, gets up in a rather quick motion, and drops a leg onto King. Ced goes for the cover...

 

One!

 

TWO!

 

King manages to get a shoulder up, and sits up, looking surprised. If Ced wasn't wearing a mask, it could probably be seen that he is smirking a bit. King is getting angry as he gets back up to his feet, and Ced slowly approaches King. King is ready this time, and catches Ced hard in the gut with a punch that sends him doubling over. King quickly gets up, going to set him up for a move from a dragon sleeper, but Ced manages to use the nearby ropes to his advantage, using them as a ladder to push up off of, and fell back with his weight into King, staying on for a cover...

 

One!

 

TWO!

 

King lets go of the hold, allowing for a kickout. Ced comes off the ropes, apparently ready to drop some type of move onto King while he's down, but King rolls to the outside of the ring, where Kelly is right there to talk to him.

 

Comet: So much for King having this one in the bag, huh Riley?

 

Riley: Oh shut up! Even the greatest wrestlers have to take some time to rest up and re-gather their thoughts.

 

King and Kelly talk a bit outside the ring, as the referee starts to count out King. Kelly protests to the referee that this should be a legal time out and not a count out, but the referee keeps counting. Ced in the meantime climbs up to the top rope while King is on the outside, and jumps off, catching King with a missile dropkick that almost causes him to fall right on top of Kelly! Ced jumps back onto the ring apron shortly after, and drops a double stomp right into the chest of King, then quickly picks him up and goes to toss him into the ring, so as not to get a count out victory. Ced moves in towards King now, but King holds up his hands, trying to get a brief respite in the ring. Ced pauses just for a moment, but only enough to come in for a kick. King shows that this was part of a plan, and grabs Ced's leg, wrenching it down to the mat, and starting to slam Ced's leg repeatedly into the mat now. King waits a bit for Ced to get up into a seated position, then comes off the ropes with a forward roll, snapping Ced's neck towards his body. King smirks a bit at this now, and poses for the crowd.

 

Comet: I have never gotten the point of posing when you're in a match like this. Someone like Ced could easily get an advantage if you're not careful.

 

Riley: Like Ced's Freestyle Routine is any better.

 

King turns around to see Ced holding his neck, and this makes him grin a bit. He slides over, and while Ced is on his stomach, quickly locks him in a Full Nelson hold...then repeatedly slams Ced's face to the mat, showing no remorse as he does this...an almost psychotic look in his eyes. Still holding onto the full nelson, and sitting on Ced's legs, he pulls back now, trying to bend Ced in half backwards. However, the referee quickly notes to King that Ced's foot is under the bottom rope, and King breaks the hold, but it's apparent that all this neck work is starting to take it's toll on Ced. King doesn't let up his attack yet, and goes to pick up Ced again, putting him in a reverse DDT, having the neck of Ced landing right onto his knee...pulling up once again, and delivering the move once more. King now goes for his first cover of the match...

 

One!

 

TWO!

 

THR...NO!

 

Ced's shoulder BARELY lifts off the mat in time, but that's all Ced can really do right now, as his brains are just slightly scrambled from the moves to the neck and head. King decides to add a bit more trauma to his body there, and goes to climb up to the top rope, moving an arm in a circular motion to prepare to drop the elbow on Ced's neck, but as King is coming down off the top, Ced manages to roll out of the way, causing King to land HARD on his elbow. Ced takes the time to recover enough to get back up onto his feet, as King gets up as well. King rushes in to catch Ced with a forearm, but Ced is ready for him, and nails King in the face with a dropkick. Ced waits a bit for King to get back up, and catches him again, this time with a running high kick that sends King into the ropes, and right into a hurricanrana by Ced. Ced stays on for the cover...

 

One!

 

TWO!

 

THREE...NO!

 

King pushes Ced off him just enough to get out. Ced waits a bit for King to get up enough, then pulls him over with the Dragon Screw Legwhip, causing Max's leg to feel a bit of pain now. King winces a bit, and Ced goes for the Cross Lightning, but King shows he's not completely down, and manages to roll up Ced!

 

One!

 

TWO!

 

Ced manages to get out of the pinning prediciment, surprised that King could pull that off so suddenly. Ced is still up to his feet first though, and rushes into King, catching him with the Powerdrive Elbow that sends King all the way to the arena floor. Ced quickly gets up to the top rope now, and as soon as King is back to his feet, goes to deliver a body splash from the top rope. King braces himself though, with a little help from Kelly, and CATCHES Ced on the outside of the ring, then rushes into the ring post, slamming Ced's back HARD into it.

 

Riley: YES! That's the way King! Show that little man what you've got in the way of talent!

 

Comet: So far this has been a very back and forth match between two great competitors, both of whom have bright futures here. However, I don't like the looks of where things are going for Ced right now.

 

Riley: And it's a good thing that this is happening this way now. I was starting to worry King would have a blemish on his record this early on in his SWF career.

 

King pushes Ced back into the ring, smiling a bit now. Deciding that the match is over, he picks up Ced again, and this time goes for his King Buster finisher. Ced however manages to fall back with this one too, and drops KING with a reverse DDT! Both men are down in the middle of the ring...

 

One!

 

TWO!

 

THREE!

 

FOUR!

 

Comet: This match may end in a double knock down! King has been taken out by that surprise reverse DDT, but Ced is still hurting from the ringpost to his back from earlier!

 

Riley: Come on Kelly, urge King on! Tell him to get up!

 

The referee's count manages to get up to 7 before Ced manages to get up to his feet. Seeing King is still down in the middle of the ring, he quickly kicks King right in the head to make sure that he stays down, and climbs up to the top rope!

 

Comet: Ced going up to the high risk area, and apparently he wants to fly! This could be the set up that Ced needs to get the win! Ced off the top, going for the Fire Soul...

 

Riley: KING WITH THE LEGS UP! Max King having enough ring presence to know exactly where Ced was, and managed to catch him right into that hurting back!

 

Comet: King slow to get back up himself, and he and Ced fight to get to their feet...Ced struggling up, King going for a suplex...blocked by Ced...Ced going for a neckbreaker...King blocks...lifting up...

 

Riley: KING BUSTER! Max King drops Ced HARD on his head with that King Buster!

 

Comet: King now going for the cover...

 

One!

 

TWO!

 

THREE!!

 

*Ding Ding*

 

Funyon: The winner of this match..."THE ICON" MAX KING!

 

Comet: A hard fought victory for "The Icon", but you have to give credit to Ced Ordonez as well. Ced NEVER gave up in that match, but his body apparently couldn't take anymore.

 

Riley: And King is standing tall once again, Kelly right there to great him. I predict it now Comet...King will be a champion before the year is out!

 

As Ced holds his head and neck in pain, King and Kelly make their way to the entryway, all smiles as they embrace closely.

[the.weej 0]

In the privacy of his locker room, Johnny has begun a pre-match warm up of squats. “Thirty four,” he groans, standing back up. “Thirty five!”

 

KNOCK!

KNOCK!

 

A knock at the door startles him from his workout, he turns and shouts, “it’s open,” before reaching for a towel. The door swings open, and Ben Hardy comes strolling in with Gus a step behind. For a moment Ben just stares, perplexed that Johnny is dressed in a black singlet with red, white, and blue stripes within a “V” pattern on his back—the exact same outfit of Wild and Dangerous.”

 

“Johnny,” he says, the camera lights glaring on Johnny, “can we get a few words about the end of your Cruiserweight title reign and your match for tonight?”

 

Johnny sighs, he had hoped to not have to think about what happened on Lockdown. The night he fell to Austin Sly and lost his Cruiserweight Championship, but now it was the first question on the reporters mind. “Ben,” he begins, “on Lockdown, Austin Sly was the better man. I’m not sure what else I can say about it except he beat me, and he became the man that took finally took the Cruiserweight Championship from me.”

 

“And your match tonight?”

 

“Ben I have to be on top of my game tonight,” he replies, wiping his face with a towel. “I realize who I’m facing. A two time World Champion, and the current number one contender to that very same title. All the odds are stacked against me, and I know this. Unfortunately, I don’t have much of a choice… I have to win tonight. There is no other option; there is nothing else left if I don’t.”

 

“So this will give you better freedom of movement?” ask Ben, pointing at Johnny’s outfit. Deep down, Hardy realizes that Johnny is a dead duck tonight, and so a quick changing of subject is in order.”

 

“Ben,” Johnny tosses the towel over his shoulder and takes a deep breath. “I’m also doing this to honor my friend, my former partner, the Wildchild. This is the same thing I wore every night when Wild and Dangerous went out there and won the Tag team Championship and then…when we defended them! I wore this for those matches because Wildchild asked me to do it, and now I wear this because I know he wouldn’t want to see me in anything else. How can I possibly fulfill this part of the legacy if I do not fully embrace what it means to me?”

 

Johnny opens the locker door and tosses the towel in, then turns and heads for the door. He turns back towards the camera, “I appreciate you taking the time to come see me. However, if you’ll excuse me, I have a few things I need to do before this match—it means a lot to me, I’m sure you would understand. Never have I taken on a challenge like this twice, willingly, but if I’m still able to talk tomorrow you can ask me anything else you want, Benjamin.”

 

Hardy nods in approval, taking a step back and motioning the cameraman back with his arm as Johnny walks to the door. He reaches out for the doorknob them stops and turns back towards the reporter. “Wish me luck,” he says, almost fearfully before turning back and heading out the door.

[the.weej 0]

Coming back from commercial break, SWF Smarkdown's part dynamic, part ambigeuosly gay duo of Cyclone Comet and Bobby Riley, welcome TV viewers with the combo of enthusism and apathy that only they can bring to the table.

 

"Welcome back to Rosenblatt Stadium in Omaha, Nebraska, loyal citizens, I, CYCLOOOOOOONE Comet, along-side, Robert Riley--"

 

"--Mr. Riley, if you're nasty." interrupts Bobby, with a knowing smirk and a telling wink for the camera.

 

Comet coughs, subtley looking away from his partner. "Yes, yes, if you're nasty, Bobby... as I was saying, we're about to see another title defense after a stunning Cruiserweight championship clash. I tell you now, this contest will be just as intense a battle, over another prized belt in our federation."

 

"It's champion versus challenger. Double champ versus double chump. Mike Van Siclen versus Ryan Dustin, and it's happening right here, right now!" contributes Riley giddily, as the camera cuts to the ring.

 

"The following contest--under Hardcore rules--is scheduled for one fall," begins the SWF's own resident ring announcer, Funyon, notifying everyone of the rules and regulations. "and is for the Smarks Wrestling Federation, Hardcore Championship!"

 

"I'm an Ouuuuut-law!"

 

The house lights have already dropped, and the vocals have already hit, causing the crowd to stand up and cheer, while the low key, but upbeat "Lapdance" by N.E.R.D. blares throughout the arena.

 

"And here comes the challenger, Robert." notes Comet.

 

Brillant strobes of white, yellow, blue and red, flash about the arena, bathing the standing crowd in a mutli-colored hue in time with the beat...

 

"Quick on the draw -- Quick on the draw...

Something you never seen before -- never seen..."

 

And as N.E.R.D’S ‘Lap-dance’ continues, it draws Ryan Dustin center-stage, spotlight shinning, as he faces the crowd - arms folded across his chest - while in a casual lean; his red cameo jacket fluttering from an unknown undercurrent.

 

"And I dare a muthafucker to come in my face!"

 

"Introducing first--the challenger," continues Funyon, after a short pause. After a pause, Dustin makes his way to the ring, interacting with various fans by placing them in his 'picture frame'. "Making his way to ringside—from Carson City, Nevada, weighing in tonight at two hundred and twenty-eight pounds, he is the Real Deal... RYAN DUSSSS-TIN!" announces Funyon, while Dustin slaps hands with a few fans.

 

Ryan reaches the ring, climbing up the outside of the turnbuckle, he poses once again, sizing up a few members of the crowd on the opposite side of the ring, by placing his hands in the form of a 'picture frame' again. As if waiting for a cue, Ryan turns to the near side crowd, nodding his head to the beat...

 

"It's so real!

How I feel!"

 

...before backflipping into the ring, giving the fans a little flourish for their buck. The crowd responds to that with a sizable pop, as Ryan disgardes his jacket and glasses, then stands at the ready in his corner, as his music fades into the background.

 

"And his opponent!" bellows Funyon.

 

"I’m head of the class… I’m popular…”

 

“Popular” by Nada Surf kicks up, as gold pyro sprays forth like a water fountain, up into the clear night sky, easily seen in the . The pyro falls and the top of the entrance ramp is showered in gold, as Mike Van Siclen leaps out from behind the curtain, walking down the ramp with a slick smile on his face.

 

"Making his way to the ring--from Harrison, Illinois, weighing in tonight at two hundred and twenty-four pounds, he is the Smarks Wrestling Federation HARDCORE champion and the one true Specticale... MIKE VAN SICCCCCC-LEN!"

 

Mike mockingly points to some fans before sliding into the center of the ring, all in one motion and nodding at the crowd like, “Yeah, I’m the best,”. Van Siclen checks out Dustin as he unstraps his belt and hands it to tonights referee, Eddy Long. Mike, clearly not impressed by the Real Deal, who has sized him up in a picture frame, runs a hand through his hair and gives Dustin the finger.

 

"Mike just gave Dustin something to picture frame, Comet." says a chuckling Bobby Riley, but Comet ignores commenting on the leud gesture. "Citizen Dustin attempting to gain his first SWF championship, but Mike Van Siclen will not just go quietly into the cool Nebraska night. Only one man will leave tonight, the Hardcore champion."

 

Long raises the belt high in the air and then hands it to an attend, signalling for the bell.

 

DING—DING—DING!!!

 

Both men test the ropes in their own way, while they quicken the pace, finally crashing together and grappling for position. Mike takes control, surprising Dustin and transitions into a side headlock takedown. Mike holds onto the headlock, as Ryan slides on the mat, trying to get into a better position, and he does, surprising MVS by quickly grabbing a head scissors. Van Siclen kips up, breaking the hold and both wrestlers scramble to their feet. Mike gets under control first and grabs the Real Deal, while he’s still on one knee, hooking him into a fireman's carry -- the fireman’s carry takedown surprises Dustin, but he readjusts and laces his arm with Mike's before whipping him over onto his back and half way across the ring!

 

“By the wrath of Kahn... an arm drag out of a Fireman’s carry! What an innovative counter from citizen Dustin! And he's pressing his advantage--Dustin with an Irish whip, but it's reversed! Ryan now on the return--and this match is moving at a frantic pace, as citizen Dustin ducks a lariat--"

 

...

 

"--Heh, but he didn't dodge that arm drag." observes Bobby, as Mike stares down at Ryan with a cocky smirk, his opponents quizical look most amusing. Van Siclen nods his head smuggly, and backpedals to the middle of the ring, as the fact that he got outmaneuvered finally registers across Dustin's face. "Look at him--look it--he looks shocked! It's like somebody told him last call is over!"

 

"It seems Dustin believed his experience might give him the advantage early, like in most of his recent matches, but citizen Van Siclen out arm dragged and out-played Ryan at his own game."

 

Mike taunts Dustin to get up off the ground and he obilges, causing the two to come together in a collar and elbow, once again controlled by MVS, but only briefly as Ryan shifts his weight and moves into a headlock. MVS attempts to sandbag, but Dustin plants his feet and sends him over with a side headlock takedown. Mike quickly gets his shoulders off the mat, and Mike, now in better position brings them up to their feet and walks them into the near ropes. Mike uses the momentum and a forearm to the ribs to his advantage and tosses Ryan away, but the Real Deal rebounds quickly, moving into him with a shoulder block. Dustin looks down and bounces off the ropes, causing MVS to flip over onto his belly – allowing Ryan to stop quickly and fall right back into another side headlock!

 

“Ho-ho, a little one-upsmanship there, Bobby! Ryan was on the losing end of their first exchange, so he outsmarted citizen Van Siclen to prove they're on even ground.” notes Comet, as Ryan secures the hold, smiling a bit. “He won't win the match like this, especially in a Hardcore environment.” adds Riley, in response. "Mike showed him up because he could--and can at any time, but Dustin's just trying to keep pace."

 

“You may be correct, Robert, but he’s still in control, now isn’t he?”

 

"For now, anyway."

 

MVS scowls in the hold, somewhat miffed, but once again brings them up to their feet and walks them into the near ropes. Mike uses the momentum gain again and tosses Ryan away, sending the Real Deal off to run the ropes. Dustin rebounds, coming back with a vengence, but gets caught in a gut-wretch. Van Siclen spins Dustin like a top into a tilt-a-whirl--nope, Ryan wraps his legs around Mike's neck, now spinning him! But, Mike won't go down and catches Ryan, twirling him around his back for a side slam, like they're swing dancing center ring--no!! The Real Deal readjusts, using new momentum from MVS, he swings his legs back up around Mike's neck and with a final tug, sends him sprawling to the canvas skidding into the ropes!! Both Mike and Ryan quickly pop up to their feet, but clearly still dizzy from the exchange Mike lands back on his ass just as quickly...

 

"Holy Tazmanian Devil!" shouts Comet, as Ryan looks down at MVS with the same smirk Mike gave him earlier. "What a whirling dervish those two were just in! And citizen Dustin is the last man standing this time, Bobby."

 

Ryan, looking to press his advantage speeds forward and lifts Van Siclen to his feet. Dustin nails MVS with a shotei to the chest, which backs him into the ropes leading to an Irish whip. Mike runs the ropes himself, as Dustin springs into a leaping sidekick--no, Mike ducks underneath, stopping on a dime and grasping a shocked Ryan about the waist, tossing him overhead in a release german suplex...

 

...but you can't german Ryan Dustin, so the Real Deal shifts his weight and lands on his feet checking his knee quickly, and MVS has no clue! The crowd lets loose a small cheer, causing Mike to turn around, and gape. Dustin beckons Mike forward with a subtle Bruce Lee like taunt -- flicking his own nose twice -- before going into a defensive stance. Mike charges blindly and stumbles into a drop toe hold across the middle rope! MVS holds his throat, while tangled up in the ropes, but Dustin doesn't give him any time to recover. The Real Deal hits MVS in the back with two forearm shots, then wraps his arms around Mike's waist and yanks the slightly gaging Van Siclen away from the ropes, and onto the top of his shoulder blades in a release German suplex!

 

"Citizen Van Siclen losing his cool early and now he's in some considerable trouble, as Ryan Dustin exits the ring." And true to Comet's word, Ryan moves through the ropes and stands on the apron, at the ready, awaiting Mike getting to his feet.

 

"I agree, Comet, but high risk moves are just that, high risk--Mike's getting to his feet now, and Dustin leaps to the top rope..."

 

Ryan jumps up for the springboard and briefly balances himself, before diving out at MVS! The crowd rises to its' feet, as Dustin lands on Mike's shoulders and snaps back in a hurracanrana--or what would have been a hurracanrana, but isn't because Mike Van Siclen out-powers his opponent and blocks the rana with ease!

 

Slowly. Mike, while holding Dustin by the waist, lowers Ryan onto his hands.

 

"Mike Van Siclen playing possum, gets his opponent to leap into a trap and now he's ready to read Ryan Dustin the Riot Act!"

 

The Real Deal's eyes go wide, as Mike attempts to lasso his arms, taking a step to collect his arm -- but Dustin thinks fast and uses his hands to walk around the ring, while MVS takes wide steps behind him.

 

"One step, two steps, three steps, four--around the ring for citizen Van Siclen--he just can't lasso Ryan's arms, Robert!"

 

"What is this, Sesame Street, Comet? Dustin needs to just take his head drop like a man." states an upset Riley, as Mike is clearly beginning to get annoyed with this game and pauses to readjust his grip on Dustin, but Ryan uses that to his advantage and takes his handstand, and turns it into--

 

"Dustin should do no such thing! He should fight until--a Sunset flip!" says Comet, screaming the last portion of his sentence, while Dustin goes over the top of a startled MVS, sliding down his back and tugging at his thighs, before pulling him into the above-mentioned pinning predicament! Long drops to make the count...

 

 

ONE!

 

 

 

 

 

TWO!

 

 

 

 

 

THR--No! Van Siclen rolls his shouldera off the canvas and stumbles back in shocked anger, rolling out of the ring to try and regain his bearings. "By Snuffleufflegus trunk, that was quite the humorous dance, but that smart stalling tactic lead to a beautiful pin combination."

 

Dustin gives Mike no time to relax though, as he quickly marches over to where MVS stands and grabs ahold of the top cable... the front row, along with the rest of the crowd, rises in it's seats causing MVS to turn around. Ryan, not to be deturded, slingshots himself over the top rope...

 

Mike quickly hits the deck, diving out of the way of the would-be plancha, but Dustin lands on the apron, back turned to Van Siclen. The crowd gets their cameras ready, sure something's about to happen, while Mike stands up, only to see the Real Deal bouncing off the middle rope...

 

 

Up to the top rope.

 

 

Flipping in mid-air, as Mike stares wide-eyed, sure he can't get out of the way of this one. And Ryan lands on Mike Van Siclen, as the flash bulbs continue to go off, giving to the fans and anyone else who wanted to see, a real classic moment!!

 

"ZOUNDS!" hollers Comet, in shock as the two men lay on the outside. Riley looks at the collision site and nods his head in agreement with Comet for the first time in this match. "Zounds, indeed, Comet."

 

Ryan is the first to get up, shaking out the cobwebs and grabbing MVS by the hair, pulling him up as well. Ryan pops the weakened Van Siclen with an european uppercut. And Mike stumbles away, trying to gain some space between him and Dustin. The Real Deal continues to go after the Specticale, turning him around and hitting another european uppercut. Mike stumbles away again, this time a little slower and as Ryan moves up behind him, getting ready to turn him around, Van Siclen mule kicks the ever lovin' crap out of Dustin's balls!

 

"Injustice, an illegal blow!" shouts Comet, jumping up out of his seat in protest, as Mike, clearly not as hurt as he let on, grabs Dustin by the head and tights, and tosses him back into the ring. Riley grabs Comet by the cape and yanks him back down into his seat. "It's not illegal when there aren't any rules, Comet, so take a seat and find a better lead-in to your catch phrase. He baited him in and made him pay! Nothing wrong with that!" Inside the ring, Ryan Dustin holds his testicals in pain, as Mike runs a calming hand through his hair and drops to a knee, ignoring the admonishings of Long.

 

"Inside that squared circle, Robert, sits Ryan Dustin--a victim of clear injustice--yes, injustice, Robert--that was perpetuated by that man directly in front of us. There may be no rules in a match of this nature," says Comet with a pointed look to Riley. "but some things go too far!"

 

Meanwhile, MVS lifts up the ring apron and seems to be looking for something underneath the ring. Ryan, crawling towards the ropes -- clearly still aching from the cheap shot -- attempts to bring Mike back into the ring, leans through the ropes and--

 

Crack!

 

--eats a shot to the face from whatever MVS picked up. "Wow, whatever that was, Comet, it made sure Ryan'll keep out of Mike's business."

 

Hearing Riley's comment, Van Siclen turns the 'keep off' sign around and shows it to him, garnering a slight chuckle. "Well, I was close, Comet--keep out, keep off, it's all the same when it goes splat against your face!"

 

In the ring, Ryan holds his head, as Mike tosses the sign over the top rope. Van Siclen reaches back underneath the ring apron and pulls out the top of a ladder to a pop from the audience, but MVS turns to the crowd and just waggles his finger, dropping the half pulled out ladder to boisterous boos.

 

"Never tease SWF fans, Riley. If you show them a ladder, then you use the ladder."

 

Mike walks over to the time keepers table and punks him out, taking his folding chair and sliding it into the ring. Meanwhile, Dustin has crawled up to his hands and knees, still feeling the low blow, more than the sign shot. Mike rolls back into the ring, absorbing the boos, as he stalks behind Ryan, latching onto the back of his neck. He slowly pulls Ryan up to his feet, pointing out at the crowd while spinning around slowly with Dustin still in his grasp, getting more and more boos for each section he passes by, until finally--

 

Wham!

 

--yanking Ryan's neck down onto his knee, causing the Real Deal to spasm briefly, before Mike pulls one of Dustin's legs over his body in a modified pin! Eddy Long slides into position...

 

 

ONE!

 

 

 

TWO!

 

 

 

THR--No! Ryan's body lunges up in a kick-out, getting a cheer out of the crowd! Mike smiles and stands up, wallking over to the chair he had moments ago. "What is he doing?" asks Comet, as Mike grabs the chair and bangs it against the mat once. Ryan sits up and blinks, while MVS stalks his opponent.

 

"He's about to introduce the Real Deal's face, to some very real steel, Comet!" glibs Bobby Riley. Dustin pushes himself up, his old body, clearly not ready to be dead and buried yet. But Mike still looms. The chair, lifted high above his head...

 

Mike rears back.

 

Crack!

 

Clean, swift and precise. The chair finds its mark, across the top of Dustin's dome! Ryan crumples to the mat, but has the presence of mind to fall onto his belly, buying himself some more time.

 

"Vile!" screams Comet, as Van Siclen drops the chair off to the side and watches Ryan Dustin, who now begins to bleed. "A Vile, heinous, villianous attack from citizen Van Siclen!"

 

"You're right, the Specticale is villianous." states Riley, agreeing with a surprised Comet. But he continues. "You need to have a certain level of intensity, bordering on being sadistic, to win any match--least of all, a title match! Mike Van Siclen brings that to the table. When has this guy done anything except lay on his back, or suck on a bottle of alcohol, in the SWF?"

 

Mike toes Dustin over onto his back and drops into a lateral press, not really putting much effort into the pin.

 

 

ONE!

 

 

 

 

 

TWO!

 

 

 

 

 

THRE--No! Ryan gets a VERY weak kick-out just before the count of three. "Ryan Dustin may have kept himself in this match with his veteran instincts there, Bobby. Getting to his stomach cost MVS valuable seconds, and along with that lazy cover, he's still got a fighting chance."

 

Ryan, clearly in need of some time to recover, stalls on the mat as Mike attempts to pick him up, by sandbagging as much as Ryan can, forcing MVS to get a front facelock. Mike uses the leverage the facelock allows to pull the dizzy, and bleeding Dustin up.

 

"Now what?" shouts Comet, as MVS points down towards the sign and nods his head to a chorus of boos from the crowd, that may or may not get his subtle joke. Bobby Riley, oddly in the loop for once, is quick to point it out for the home audience.

 

"Oh the irony, of it all! Mike's a rule breaker in every sense of the word, but driving Dustin head first onto a 'keep off' sign, just about takes the cake!"

 

Mike pulls Ryan another few steps towards the sign, garnering more boos as he goes, until he stands directly over the thin piece of metal. Dustin seems to be finally showing signs of waking up, but that changes very quickly, as Mike spins around, driving his arm into the neck of Ryan and sending them both down to the canvas... obviously, the Real Deal took the real damage! MVS sits up and motions to the crowd to boo him some more and they do just that, tearing into the Spectacle.

 

"Citizen Van Siclen taking too long to cover, Robert, in my opinion." mentions Cyclone, as MVS finally pushes Dustin off his belly and into a lateral press, forearm raked across Dustin's face, cockily. Eddy Long makes the count...

 

 

ONE!

 

 

"Didn't you see Ryan's head bounce off that sign!"

 

 

TWO!

 

 

"It's over, right here!"

 

 

THREE!

 

 

"Told ya', Comet."

 

 

NOOOO!

 

"No?" says Riley faintly, as Ryan's shoulder jerks off the canvas, causing a HUGE cheer to come forth. Mike looks to Long, but gets told it was two quickly. MVS, instinct taking over, goes for another cover, this time cradling the head and leg in a textbook pin. Long drops again...

 

 

ONE!

 

 

"No..."

 

 

TWO!

 

 

"Yes, Robert! No!"

 

 

THREE!

 

 

"No?!"

 

 

NOOOO!

 

"NO?!" shouts an incredulous Riley, as Dustin's pesky shoulder shoots off the mat again, causing Van Siclen to look around in panic. Mike manicially hooks both legs this time, sure that he imagining this series of events. "But it should be over..."

 

 

ONE!

 

 

"But it's not over yet, Bobby!"

 

 

TWO!

 

 

"He's going to keep kicking out!"

 

 

THREE!

 

 

"And keep kicking out!"

 

 

NOOOO!

 

 

"Until he has nothing left! And let me tell you that could be a long way away, if he really gives this his all!!"

 

Van Siclen looks around to the stars, resigned to his fate, after Dustin's shoulder shot off the mat forcing him out of the pin, once more! Ryan looks ragged and bloody, but clearly something more is necessary to put him away. Mike looks around the ring and spots the steel chair that aided him so well before, and wonders just why he went away from it in the first place. Irony may be funny, but apparently it doesn't win matches like a steel chair assisted, Code Red would have. Anger in his eyes, and not noticing Ryan starting to stir, Mike gets up and stalks over to the chair that probably would have ended this match already.

 

"Mike Van Siclen's the only double champion in the goddamn fed, how the hell is this guy still in this match?" swears Riley, after the multiple kick-outs.

 

"He raised his shoulder off the canvas repeatedly, Robert. I thought that was self-explanitory."

 

"I know that, you caped cretin! But, how did he do it?" Comet quirks an eyebrow and raises his index finger, but Bobby cuts him off. "No responses! That was rhetorical, idiot!" snaps Riley, leaving his announce partner with a gaping mouth.

 

Frustrated, MVS stares down chair and shakes his head, sure that he'd have won the match if he'd used it. But what's done is done and Mike grabs the chair, raising it above his head and turning to go for homerun swing and finish the match with the real Hardcore Code Red...

 

 

Thwack!

 

 

But he eats superkick all the same.

 

The crowd explodes as Dustin falls back to the canvas, trying to regain his bearings, while MVS blinks continuously on the mat, as Ryan pushes himself up of on his hands, blood now getting into his hair. "Done Deal! Done Deal out of NOWHERE, Bobby!" screams Comet, eyes wide open. Eyes also wide, MVS sits up and looks to his right where the chair fell from his grasp. He was lucky it wasn't in front of his face or he'd be out now. Mike stands slowly, chair in hand and in front of him, as he sees Ryan running forward... he looks down at his knee… and sees Ryan kicking off it with his own right foot…

 

 

Crack!!

 

 

…And in the end, he positively blasts Mike with a steel chair assisted shinning wizard~!!

 

"By Madjoras Mask! That's the same steel chair and shinning wizard combo that got citizen Dustin the win last week!" screams Comet, as Ryan holds his knee in agony for a few seconds, and then slowly makes his way towards the probably concussed Van Siclen.

 

“Cover!” shouts Comet, as Dustin crawls on top of Mike, the crowd counting along!

 

 

“OONNNEEEE!”

 

 

 

 

“Kick out, Mike!”

 

 

 

 

“TWWWWOOOOOOO!”

 

 

 

 

“Come on—come on!”

 

 

 

 

“THREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!”

 

 

...

 

 

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

 

Ryan, now unsure of himself, goes to what he knows. He lifts MVS up quickly, backing him up near the ropes with a shotei to the jaw and trying to put him down with one of his deadly suplexes. The Sambo suplex, but Mike won't die yet, firing off elbows that shake Dustin. And MVS executes a standing switch right into a German suplex...

 

 

Near the corner...

 

 

Into turnbuckles!!! Ryan's back shakes in pain, as he stumbles out of the corner holding his neck. Vaguely he can hear Riley...

 

"Mike ain't teasing this time!" says Riley, as Mike grabs the ladder, places it in the ring and rolls back in. MVS hefts the ladder onto his shoulder and rushes forward into Dustin--

 

Crack!

 

--blasts him it! The crowd 'oohs' as MVS places the ladder into the nearest corner and gets Ryan, before Irishing whipping him into it!! Mike backs up to the opposite corner and runs forward, leaping and spinning 360 degrees, but hitting nothing but ladder!! A bloody Ryan pops back up into the picture and wraps his arms under MVS's and arches back in a suplex!!

 

"Sambo suplex hits and the wannabe Wildchild attempt misses!" shouts Comet, as Ryan grabs MVS again, not even bothering with a cover, as he tosses him into the ladder with an Irish whip! Dustin leaps onto the corner and blasts away with right hands, the crowd counting along with him. MVS's head banging into the ladder each time he punches. He grabs Mike again and tosses him into the opposite corner. Hard. Comet and Riley watch not sure just what is going on.

 

"Ryan Dustin, really laying into Van Siclen, Comet..."

 

"And this is getting very, very, Hardcore folks." adds Comet, as Ryan grabs the ladder and hefts the ladder onto his shoulder, rushing forward into the corner--

 

Crack!

 

--and crushes it into Mike's face!! The crowd cheers on reaction, but Comet is unsure. Riley was on MVS side all along. "What the hell--he's backing up--oh! Right into the face again!! Mike's a bloody mess now!"

 

Ryan drops the ladder into a neutral corner and walks slowly back towards MVS, snitches in a front facelock and after a delay, snaps him out of the corner in a suplex! "The Real Deal, going for a blonde moment here..." adds Riley, as Dustin rocks back up to his feet, and slowly powers MVS up, while breathing heavily, and sends him back down!! "And it looks like he's gonna get it."

 

Dustin rolls up to his feet, clearly laboring, and after taking a look around, lifts MVS once again, stalling him in mid-air and walking him over to the 'keep off' sign, near the turnbuckle, before slamming him down upon it, face first!!!

 

Ryan stares up at the night sky, the stars winking at him as he blinks the blood out of his eyes, and he gets inspired. Moved. "Dustin's getting up... and he's not covering?" questions Riley, as Ryan stands and ambles over to the corner, climbing up the turnbuckle pads, slowly but surely. Dustin wipes a little blood out of his eyes and preps for his StarDust Press!!! The crowd rises once again, cheering with their hearts, as Ryan signals...

 

 

 

 

...and out of the corner of his eye, he see Eddy Long pushed into the ropes, as he gets crotched! MVS slyly gets to his feet and stumbles towards the corner, not caring if Long admonishes him, cause it was a legal move tonight and climbs up to the top rope!! Ryan won't give up though and cracks him with two back elbows, trying to send him off the turnbuckle! But Ryan loses out and MVS pulls him down to the canvas with a Super Backdrop suplex!!!

 

 

ONE!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

TWO!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

THREE!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

NOOOOOOOO! Mike stumbles, bleeding like a pig as he asks the ref, one more time. Getting a no, MVS looks to the ladder. He's got to do something.

 

"Mike looking to finish this thing." says Riley, unsure just what's about to happen, as Mike resets the ladder, not sure what he can do to beat Dustin, but he knows it needs to be big. MVS begins to climb for a rare finisher, one that'll end this thing, but he's bleeding and hurt. Going up two rungs quickly, he slips on his own bloody hand, so he takes his time, moving up one at a time. The crowd roars and he wonders why. They been booing all night...

 

 

And it hits him like a ton of brinks.

 

 

Ryan Dustin climbs the ladder, blood in his blonde hair, behind MVS. The Specticale is in his grasp and Ryan turns around... reaches up.

 

 

"Holy [bleep]..." mumbles Riley. "He wouldn't..."

 

"I-I... don't know..."

 

And pulls him.

 

 

 

ALL

 

 

 

 

THE

 

 

 

 

WAY

 

 

 

 

D

O

W

N!

 

 

 

 

WHAM!

 

 

Hitting the Real Deal off the middle of the goddamn ladder!!!

 

Comet and Riley stare in shock. The crowd explodes into cheer, but the announce say nothing, clearly letting the moment speak for itself. Chants of 'Holy Shit!' can be hear in the background, as Dustinfinally sits up, unsure of himself and rolls over onto MVS, who is spread eagle on the mat. The crowd chants along.

 

 

“OONNNEEEE!”

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

“TWWWWOOOOOOO!”

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Three. "RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!"

 

 

"The winner of this match and your NEEEEEEEW Smarks Wrestling Federation HARDCORE champion, he is the Real Deal... RYAN DUSSSSS--TIN!" bellows Funyon, over the loud pop still blazing from the crowd.

 

"Loyal citizen's, this was... this was something else--but these two wrestler put on a show for the Hardcore title. It was a bloody, brutal show, but in the end we have a new champion. It appears, Bobby Riley, that the crowd pleaser, Ryan Dustin, deep down inside, has that sadistic streak you spoke of..."

 

"And he'll need every bit of it if he wants to remain SWF Hardcore champion, Comet."

 

And we fade to commercial break with those words and the odd look on Bobby Riley's face. It's a look of mild concern. It seems he didn't think Dustin had it in him. He didn't believe Dustin could do what it took to win a title, in the SWF.

 

And he was wrong.

Edited June 29, 2004 by realitycheck

[the.weej 0]

Returning from the commercial break, a voice breaks through from the P.A. System…

 

“Miss me?”

 

The SmarkTron comes to life as the fans all turn their heads, catching the face of COY WEST staring down upon them all. The bottom of the screen reads “Live Via Satellite” but the fans don’t even seem to care as a ruckus cheer breaks out.

 

“Calm down. Calm down…I missed y’all, too. Now, I’m sure every single of you is wondering what exactly old Coy is doing getting in touch with all of ya’ll from his home, so let’s get down to business. I know Alan Clark is standing right behind that curtain below me right now…” Coy points down toward the curtain, “and he wanted me to give you all a message.” The crowd goes silent as West clears his throat.

 

“When I was a Wayward Son, me and Alan never got our chance at real tag team glory. Luckily, we were graced with the presence of Edward James, and he nearly helped us grab some gold. I say 'us’ because well, we all’s is family. But since that day, there has been a lot of training and a lot of uphill climbing. Tonight we have reached a plateau on the mountain, and Alan wanted me to share it with him…along with all of you. I’ll be watching from here...but now, without further waiting…hit the music~”

 

CARRY ON MY WAYWARD SONS…

There’ll be peace when you are done

Lay your weary heads to rest

Don’t you cry no more…

 

With those words, Coy can not help but smile as Alan Clark and Edward James walk out from behind the curtain, the fans greeting them with a huge reaction. The two men move swiftly to the ring, with Alan sliding under the bottom rope as Edward climbs up the ring steps and into the ring, joining his partner as Alan grabs a microphone from ringside and turns his attention up to the screen.

 

“COY WEST EVERYBODY!” The crowd once again cheers as Coy bids a silent farewell with a small wave of his hand and fades to black, leaving Clark and James in the ring. “Now, I’m sure by now most of you have heard the truth about me. I haven’t exactly been the most motivated man since Coy took his leave. He had become a brother to me over the short time we knew each other, and it hurt to see him go. But family comes first and I respect that, but now it’s time that our family…the Wayward Son family, moved on.” Clark turns toward Edward James.

 

“Smile, dammit!” Clark yells, causing James to jump a little, as his attention was diverted to the crowd. With a little chuckle, Eddy smiles.

 

“I thought I had it rough, but you’ve just been down in the dumps, man! You think you aren’t good enough? Is that what you think?!” Edward begins to say something in rebuttal, but Clark immediately cuts him off… “I don’t care what your damn record is! That’s all you can ever say! Stop looking down at yourself! Think about how badly you beat me in every single arcade game we have played in the last few weeks. I thought I was GOOD! But no, you must be double-jointed to pull off some of the stuff you were doing! Where the hell is that kind of energy when you are in this ring! WHERE IS IT?!

 

Alan’s berating of Edward causes a few boos from the crowd, but James can only smile wider.

 

“What the hell is that?! Still smiling?! YOU SUCK IN THIS RING! Don’t you get it? You might be one of the strongest men in this building right now, but you couldn’t fight your way out of a paper bag unless it was pixelated! That’s pathetic! COMPLETELY PATHETIC!”

 

James steps back now, his smile slowly fading.

 

“Let me guess…you want to blame it on emotional problems, right? You want to sit here and tell me that even though you have decided to give your life to this business that you let your problems get in the way of the success you should be having! These people should fear you! These people should respect you! But they don’t, man! They don’t give a DAMN about you!”

 

More boos from the crowd, and James steps back even farther, his back hitting the corner. And his shoulders sinking.

 

“If you wanted, you could grab me by the head and toss me into the fifteenth row! But you don’t! YOU ARE AFRAID! What am I going to, Edward? What am I going to do? Kick you in the shin?”

 

Edward sinks down into the corner even farther.

 

“Hit me, James! Hit me!”

 

The crowd goes silent as Alan walks toward Edward, repeating himself…

 

“Hit me! I know you want to! Stop being afraid! These people will cheer you if you take my head off with your boot, or if you drop me on my head! DO IT!”

 

Edward stays in the corner as Alan gets closer, his face only inches from the giant’s.

 

“Nobody gives a damn about you, Edward…Nobody cares about---“

 

WHAM!

 

Alan Clark is suddenly caught square in the jaw by Edward’s right hand, causing Clark to fall to the canvas and roll backwards onto his knees. Alan looks up, somewhat shocked. The crowd cheers, causing both Alan and Edward to look back and forth around the arena. After regaining his composure, Alan continues…

 

“Finally…”

 

Edward’s puzzled look returns as Alan gets to his feet, still holding his jaw.

 

“I thought I was going to have to insult your dead relatives to get you to hit me. Right now I’m glad I didn’t, cause that hurt. You get an A+ on this lesson…”

 

“Lesson?” Edward mouths as he walks out of the corner.

 

“Yeah, it’s called “channeling your rage” and you just did it…nearly took my head off in the process, but you did it.” Alan squints in pain and shakes off his jaw. “Something I’ve been trying to get you to do for weeks. And guess what…”

 

“What?”

 

“…that was the easy part.”

 

“WHAT?”

 

“Yeah. Now I have to get you to hit them back there instead of me in here…” Alan points toward the curtain, “It’s high time we get you moving in the right direction. I saw that look in your eyes when you beat me at Smash Brothers in the hotel. I saw how happy you were when you made that ten year old kid cry while playing Capcom vs. Street Fighter. You loved it. You loved to win. You were damn near elated…”

 

Edward smiles as the memories of the past few days flood his mind…

 

“…but now we have to get that energy focused on this.” Alan points down at the ring beneath their feet, “and to do that I can really only trust one man. I sure as hell haven’t been able to do it…but I *know* this guy can…” Alan points his finger toward the curtain as…

 

 

 

 

“NIGHT OF FIRE!!”

 

The entire crowd nearly does a double-take along with Edward in the ring as a set of large fireballs explode from the entranceway, bringing the veteran Ced Ordonez out from behind the curtain. After doing a few of his usual moves, Ced turns his back to the crowd and walks down the ramp, holding his arms high as the fans begin to cheer for the Bemani Cross Wizard.

 

After a slight turn at the bottom of the ramp, Ced hits the ring with a burst of speed, sliding under the bottom rope and right to Alan’s feet before standing up. Clark and Ordonez stand toe to toe with each other, both locked in a stare. After a moment to let the crowd go back into silence, Alan pulls the microphone up to his lips.

 

“It’s good to see you…”

 

Alan immediately throws his arms around Ced, embracing him in a brief hug before turning his attention back to Edward.

 

“You know who this is, right?”

 

The stupid question draws a simple nod from James.

 

“This is Ced Ordonez. My mentor. It was him who taught me how to really focus my energy and use it to it’s full potential, but as he decided it was time for himself to train and get back in the ring, our ties became slightly severed. It was only through a few brief phone calls that we got back on the same page, and now he is here to help revitalize us both! Do you see where this is going, Eddy?”

 

Another nod from James.

 

“Oh you do? Well let’s see here…Ced is going to take that focus you have on Contra or Super Mario or Mega Man or whatever…and is going to ball all of that up and aim it in a whole new direction…a WAYWARD direction. You are going to come to this ring and be feared! You are going to come to this ring and be a monster! You are going to come to this ring and be the person I know you can be…the person WE know you can be. It’s time for you to stop hiding behind your emotions and start winning! The Wayward Sons are going to gain the respect they deserve, and it starts TONIGHT right now, right here. Myself, Edward James, Ced Ordonez, and even the retired Coy West…WE are the Wayward Sons!” Alan hands the microphone over to Ordonez as the sold-out crowd cheers and chants…

 

“WAYWARD SONS! WAYWARD SONS! WAYWARD SONS!”

 

“Believe it.”

 

Two simple words, and Ced drops the mic to the canvas. The three men raise each other’s hands high in the air as “Carry On Wayward Son” begins to blare over the PA System. As Smarkdown goes to it’s next commercial break, the three men exit the ring and head up the ramp, only for Edward to stoop down and go underneath Ced, lifting him up on his shoulders to another loud pop from the audience. Ced seems surprised at first, but quickly throws his hands up once more before they leave through the curtain.

 

If anyone would have been near them as they headed backstage just then, they would have seen James look up to Ordonez….

 

“Did I hear something about you having an arcade??”

[the.weej 0]

Earlier Today…

 

Alex Zenon sits in his office, going over the last of the paperwork before the card starts for this evening. As he thumbs through Yuuichiro’s notes on the latest crop of rookies, though, he hears a sharp knock at the door.

 

“Come on in,” he says, not looking up.

 

In walks Allison Onita, straight off the road in grey sweats and a blue spaghetti-strap tank, her hair pulled back into a ponytail. She carries a sheet of paper in her hand as she shoves the door to the side. Her forehead furrowed into a scowl, Allison is obviously unhappy with Zenon, and angrily slaps the paper down onto his desk.

 

“Allison, lovely to see you,” Zenon deadpans. “And to what do I owe your company this evening?”

 

“Alex, this is crap. You know it’s crap.” Onita stares at Zenon, pointing at the copy of the card she brought in with her. The third match from the top is highlighted – Toxxic vs. Danny Williams, for the #1 Contendership to the SWF World Championship. “I don’t even know how you can pull this, not after Tom beat Dace Night best of five for the number-one spot.”

 

“So?” Zenon asks, with no emotion in his voice whatsoever. “He’s still going to get his match. It’s just not going to be one on one. What’s the problem?”

 

“The problem is that you’re trying to screw him!” shouts Allison. “I know you’re mad that he’s gotten to the top of the world, and you just flopped around in the curtain jerkers until you couldn’t compete anymore, but damn, Alex, that’s no reason to try to cut Tom out of the title picture!”

 

Zenon sits back, his arms folded across his chest. He tries not to show that he’s caught painfully off-guard by the jab, but Allison knows she’s struck him deep.

 

“You know it’s crap, Alex, and you know it’s gonna come back and haunt you when Tom wins the title ANYWAY. He knows as well as you do what you’re trying to do to him, and believe me, he’s not gonna make your life easy. Just remember that.”

 

Allison turns around and stomps out of the office, leaving the door wide open. Zenon sighs and gets up, walking over to the door to close it… but he’s met with a cloud of smoke. He sees Tom Flesher standing in front of him, a cigarette hanging out of his mouth.

 

“Johnny Dangerous?”

 

Flesher’s eyes narrow as he takes a drag off the cigarette, then blows another cloud of smoke.

 

“You’ve got to be kidding me. You’re going to take a promising cruiser and throw him in the ring against me… after you get me mad? You know better than that, Alex.” Flesher shakes his head. “If I didn’t know better, I’d think you wanted to piss me off… but you can go and sit in your office, screwing around. You know this is the only power you’ll ever have. You beat me once when it counted. Once. And it was the damn European title.”

 

Zenon rolls his eyes. “Get a f**king GRIP, Tom. I’ve got more important things to worry about than settling some petty score that’s only ever existed in your head.”

 

Flesher stares at Zenon, the tension building. He seems to want to move, but can’t bring himself to. His face reddens, and the veins in his forehead stand out.

 

“I’m not happy, Alex,” he says, tossing his cigarette at the Comissioner’s feet. “And tonight Johnny Dangerous is going to wish you’d just given me my title shot.”

 

Flesher turns and walks off, visibily shaking from his anger. Zenon simply shakes his head.

 

“Jesus,” he murmurs. “Will his head EVER shrink?”

[the.weej 0]

The live feed comes back to the Rosenblatt Stadium, but before everyone’s favourite superhero can get a syllable out to welcome the television audience back the Smarktron blacks out and jagged white letters flash up the words ‘Prepare To Be Proved Wrong’ as the crunching guitars of Lostprophets’ ‘We Still Kill The Old Way’ rings out.

 

“BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”

 

The Smarktron cuts to a shot of Toxxic taking Mike Van Siclen off a balcony and through a table with the Toxxic Shock Syndrome, the devastating landing timed to coincide with the-

 

‘GO!’

 

*BOOOM!*

 

-explosion of red pyro announcing the arrival of the SWF’s premier straight-edger! The fans in Omaha, Nebraska are vocal in their expressions of disgust for the man who appears through the smoke, but Toxxic ignores them as he and Jet make their way down to the ring.

 

“Ladies and gentlemen, the following contest is scheduled for one fall and is to determine the Joint Number One Contender to the SWF World Heavyweight Title!” Funyon booms. “Introducing first, accompanied to the ring by Jet; from Nottingham, England; weighing 218lbs... TOXX-IIIC!!”

 

Toxxic rolls under the bottom rope into the ring and ascends the turnbuckle, throwing his arms wide, palms flat and glaring out at the crowd through dark-lined eyes. The Nebraska faithful rise in response...

 

“TOXX-IC SUCKS!”

 

“TOXX-IC SUCKS!”

 

“TOXX-IC SUCKS!”

 

“Citizens, welcome back to Smarkdown!” Cyclone Comet declares. “We await the start of the first of two Number One Contender matches, in which the Straight-Edge Sensation will face off against three-time World Champion Danny Williams!”

 

“This is so unfair to Tom Flesher!” Riley whinges. “Sure, if anyone but Flesher was going to challenge for the World Title then I’d prefer it to be the Hot Commodity... but Flesher is the Number One Contender, and I can’t understand what Zenon is playing at!”

 

“I’m sure all will become clear soon, Robert,” Comet assures his broadcast partner as Toxxic strips off his England shirt and throws it over the top rope to Jet. “In the meantime, let everyone rejoice that Danny Williams is getting the chance to become SWF World Heavyweight Champion for an unprecedented fourth time!”

 

“You think that’s a reason for rejoicing...?”

 

Bobby Riley may not, but the fans in Omaha evidently do; they rise to their feet as the gentle melody of ‘Jester’s Dance’ rings out over the PA system and unanimously salute the arrival of the Louisville Elbower!

 

“DAN-E!”

 

“DAN-E!”

 

“DAN-E!”

 

Danny Williams pushes his way through the curtains obscuring the entrance and stops at the top of the ramp, soaking in the cheers from the fans. Despite all his aims and desires, Danny has never managed to make an impact in the World Title scene as he would have liked, never managed to make the title his own in the manner of an Edwin or a Flesher. And as he strides down the ramp the intent is clear in his eyes - this is the beginning of his pathway to doing just that.

 

“And his opponent!” Funyon booms over the chants of the Omaha crowd, “from Louisville, Kentucky, weighing in at 243lbs... ‘DEATHWISH’... DANN-EEE... WIIIIIIIIILL-IIAAAAMS!!”

 

“These two men have only faced each other once before, and that was in a tag match where Danny Williams and Dace Night fell to the trickery of Toxxic and Jimmy Liston,” Comet notes as Danny climbs the ring steps while the crowd noise swirls around him. “Previous to that, Toxxic had mocked Williams on his return to the federation by presenting him with a ‘Welcome Back’ card featuring a picture of Deathwish taking the Va’aiga Stinger, and you can’t help but think that Danny would love to get revenge for both those slights tonight!”

 

“I’ll thank you to remember that only Liston cheated in that match,” Riley snorts huffily. “And I promise you this Comet - there is no way that an over-jacked roidmonkey like Williams will stop Toxxic’s rise to the top!”

 

Williams steps through the ropes, brushing the long bangs back from his eyes and staring across the ring at Toxxic who for his part glares back at the former World Champion. There is no love lost between the competitors here.

 

*DING-DING-DING!*

 

Referee Nick Soapdish calls for the bell and Danny immediately closes in on his lighter (if taller) opponent, looking to grab Toxxic. For his part the Straight-Edge Sensation backs away and dodges, trying to keep away from Williams. Danny manages to back him towards a corner however and the Brit accedes to a lockup, reaching out tentatively to grab Williamss’ hand... then leaping up and hitting a dropkick on his chest, sending the Louisville Elbower staggering backwards!

 

“BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”

 

“What poor sportsmanship from Toxxic!” Comet exclaims. “He isn’t even willing to lockup with Danny!”

 

“I wonder why,” Riley comments sarcastically. “Not wanting to tie-up against a powerful mat wrestler when your own strength is high-flying? Imagine that!”

 

Danny brushes his hair back from his eyes and stares daggers at the straight-edger but Toxxic simply flips a V-sign at him and saunters casually out of the corner, refusing to be intimidated. Williams raises his arms and flexes his chemically-enhanced muscles in response, to a huge reaction from the crowd and Toxxic’s visible disgust.

 

“DAN-E!”

 

“DAN-E!”

 

“DAN-E!”

 

“And the man who has threatened - no, promised - to powerbomb Janus is making it very clear that he has the strength advantage here,” Comet notes.

 

“Please, you don’t think Toxxic knows that already?” Riley scoffs. “That’s why he’s going to keep his distance - he’s smart, Comet!”

 

“I have no doubt that Toxxic is aware of the facts but I think that Danny rubbing his nose in it may irritate the rookie,” Comet replies, “and that could give Citizen Williams an early advantage.”

 

Sure enough, Toxxic is glowering at his opponent and seems to have lost his instinct to keep away, instead putting his hands on his hips and talking trash towards Williams, presumably about his steroid use. Danny just watches the straight-edger casually, judging the distances as Toxxic edges slightly closer whilst becoming more animated... then-

 

*CRACK!*

 

-fires an elbow right into Toxxic’s jaw! The rookie staggers back into the turnbuckle, realising his mistake too late, but Danny follows him right in before Toxxic can recover and drives a knee up into the straight-edger’s gut, blasting the wind out of him. Toxxic staggers forward, bent double, and Danny raises his right arm high into the air before cracking the point down on the back of Toxxic’s skull and sending the rookie crashing to the mat!

 

“DAN-E!”

 

“DAN-E!”

 

“DAN-E!”

 

Toxxic starts to push himself up but Williams is already bouncing off the far ropes, and as the rookie rises to his knees Danny rebounds and NAILS him in the chest with a cowboy kick that would have put any soccer ball straight past the Portuguese goalkeeper of your choice! Almost before Toxxic has landed on his back Danny drops an elbow into his opponent’s chest, then simply sprawls across him for the first cover of the match...

 

ONE!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

TW-

Kickout!

 

“Toxxic not in any danger of being pinned there, but Citizen Williams is sending a message flavoured with JUSTICE~ to this arrogant upstart,” Comet declares.

 

“Yeah, well let’s see him wrestle instead of just hitting people,” Riley sulks.

 

Bobby Riley’s wish is granted (no, not the one about Tom Flesher and a vat of lime Jello) as Danny grabs the rising Toxxic and slaps on a headlock, keen to keep the straight-edger under control. Toxxic tries to wriggle out but Danny holds him tight, and when the Straight-Edge Sensation throws a forearm into Williams’ ribs to try and get him to release the hold Danny simply shifts his footing and twists his hips to take the rookie over and trap him against the mat. Nick Soapdish drops down to do his duty and ask Toxxic if he wants to give up, but the muffled swearing coming from the region of Danny Williams’ bicep informs him of Toxxic’s desire to continue.

 

“DAN-E!”

 

“DAN-E!”

 

“DAN-E!”

 

“Yeah, that’s typical of Williams,” Riley snorts. “Slap on a headlock because he knows Toxxic is a better wrestler!”

 

“Robert, it’s plain for all to see that Citizen Williams is merely using a simple hold to control the high-flying rookie and wear him down,” Comet exclaims in exasperation. “He’s gained the early advantage, now he can keep this pressure on for as long as he wants - he’s in complete command of the match!”

 

“He’s hanging on for dear life!” Riley splutters, speaking of a man who is leaning back against his opponent’s body and smiling slightly as the crowd continues to chant for him.

 

However, better wrestler though Danny may be Toxxic is faster, and the straight-edger snaps his legs up to wrap them around Williams’ neck before the champion can react. Toxxic wrenches downwards, managing to break Danny’s grip and bringing him over backwards before squirming to roll Williams up for a pin!

 

ONE!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

TW-

Kickout!

 

Danny manages to kick out with no trouble, but the agile Toxxic is quicker to his feet and he darts forward before-

 

*WHAM!!*

 

-slamming a basement dropkick into Danny’s face! Williams is knocked back down but pops back up to his feet a moment later, only to be met with a-

 

RIGHT!

 

 

LEFT!

 

 

RIGHT!

 

 

LEFT!

 

 

Windup...

 

 

DISCUS CLOTHESLINE...

 

*CRACK!!*

 

...but Danny nails Toxxic in the face first with the RRRROOOOOOLLLLLLLIIINNNNNGGGGG EEEELLLLLBBBOOOOOOOWWWWW!

 

“DAN-E!”

 

“DAN-E!”

 

“DAN-E!”

 

Williams takes a moment to rub his stinging jaw - and, notably, his right elbow - before dropping down to cover his opponent, making sure this time to hook the far leg and put all his weight on Toxxic’s shoulders...

 

ONE!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

TWO!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

TH-

Kickout!

 

“Toxxic gets his shoulder up, but that brief comeback was stopped in its tracks by the Rolling Elbow!” Comet notes as the Straight-Edge Sensation manages to escape the pin. “Don’t forget that move won Citizen Williams the World Title, although on this occasion the opponent wasn’t softened up enough for it to get the three - however, it demonstrates admirably how Danny Williams can hit a match-winning manoeuvre from virtually anywhere, at any time!”

 

“It demonstrates admirably that if you banned elbows, Danny Williams would be less use than a dictionary is to Dace Night,” Riley snorts.

 

“Robert, I have it on good authority that Dace is quite capable of using a dictionary.”

 

“If there’s a bug he wants to kill, yes.”

 

Danny hauls Toxxic up and wraps both huge arms around his opponent’s waist, then lifts the straight-edger up and sideways and plants him down on the canvas with a belly-to-belly suplex! As Toxxic lies on his back gasping for air the Louisville Elbower pushes himself back up, then simply extends his elbow and drops it back down into the rookie’s chest!

 

“Having stopped Toxxic’s offence with that Rolling Elbow to the head Citizen Williams is going back to attacking the midsection of his opponent with marvellous simplicity and efficiency,” Comet notes. “This is the perfect way for Williams to build to something like the Dangerous German, or that renowned Powerbomb.”

 

“Yeah, but how long will it take before Danny re-aggravates the injury he suffered against Mike Van Siclen?” Riley asks. “You saw him rub it, so hopefully it’ll be soon...”

 

“DAN-E!”

 

“DAN-E!”

 

“DAN-E!”

 

The fans in Omaha are still behind the former champion, who scoops Toxxic off the mat and uses his bulk to press the lighter man back against the ropes before Irish whipping him across the ring. Toxxic manages to reverse the momentum and send Danny towards the far cables instead, but with amazing agility for someone of his size Williams jumps to the second rope and slingshots his body back through the air at the Straight-Edge Sensation with a springboard elbow smash-

 

*SMACK!*

 

-but Toxxic snaps the former World Champion out of the air with a desperation dropkick! Danny lands hard on his back but start to roll back to his feet almost immediately - however Toxxic manages to snare him in a small package and brings him over backwards for the pin!

 

ONE!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

TW-

Kickout!

 

The pin was more an attempt to buy some time to recover than an actual attempt to win the match, but as Williams breaks free Toxxic comes back to his feet and then dives across Danny’s broad shoulders, hooking him and bringing him over in an Oklahoma Roll!

 

ONE!

 

 

 

 

 

 

TW-

Kickout!

 

Williams’ powerful muscles propel him out of the pin again, but before the Louisville Elbower can reset himself Toxxic leaps over him, taking his opponent down with a sunset flip!

 

ONE!

 

 

 

 

 

 

TW-

Kickout!

 

Danny kicks out again, but there is now no question that the former World Champion is growing frustrated with his inability to get to his feet and get some space. He comes up looking to fire off one of those deadly elbow smashes at his cruiserweight opponent, but before he can react Toxxic slams in a European Uppercut!

 

*WHAM!*

 

The shot rattles Danny’s jaw and knocks him back against the ropes, but Toxxic knows better than to try and get into a striking contest with the Louisville Elbower so he grabs Danny’s arm and whips his man across the ring. Williams hits the far cables and rebounds, picking up speed as he does so, and Toxxic leaps into the air to attempt a spinning heel kick...

 

...but Williams ducks under it, and continues across the ring! The former champion rebounds again as Toxxic scrambles back up and Williams draws his right arm back for a running elbow smash-

 

*BAM!!*

 

-but Toxxic slides to the left at the last minute, wraps his hands around Danny’s forehead and sitting out as Williams goes past, bringing the back of Danny’s cranium smashing down to the mat with the Underkill! Toxxic reaches forward to hook the leg as Soapdish dives down to the mat...

 

ONE!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

TWO!!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

TH-

Kickout!

 

Danny kicks out well before the three, but the former leader of the Unholy Trinity is slower to get to his feet this time. As he starts to rise Toxxic slides around in front of his opponent and delivers another jaw-rattling European Uppercut-

 

*WHAM!!*

 

-but once more, before Danny can respond in like kind Toxxic whips him across the ring again. This time however, Williams reverses it and then follows Toxxic into the ropes, arm extended to deliver a devastating lariat - but Toxxic puts on the brakes and pulls the top rope down, and Williams is unable to kill his own momentum in time to prevent himself from tumbling headfirst to the outside! The trademark lopsided grin lights up the right-hand side of Toxxic’s face and the straight-edger raises his arms in mock salute to the fans...

 

“TOXX-IC SUCKS!”

 

“TOXX-IC SUCKS!”

 

“TOXX-IC SUCKS!”

 

“And now Toxxic has managed to get the upper hand,” Comet acknowledges in surprise as the atmosphere inside the Rosenblatt Stadium grows increasingly hostile. “This all stems from that missed flying elbow that Citizen Williams attempted, but-”

 

“No, Comet, it stems from those pin attempts,” Riley replies superciliously. “You see, by not allowing Williams to his feet Toxxic managed to frustrate Danny Kong here and tricked him into trying to get in close quickly - most of Toxxic’s moves are based around manipulating his opponent’s momentum, so the quicker Danny is moving the more Toxxic can hurt him!”

 

“...Robert, sometimes I think you may actually be a half-decent commentator,” Comet admits. “If you ever tried.”

 

“Normally I’m content to turn up and collect the paycheck, but sometimes the quality of your work just drops too low to tolerate...”

 

Danny Williams picks himself up on the outside, rubbing the back of his neck where he landed. The Omaha fans continue to chant for their hero but a sudden rise in volume alerts Danny that something is amiss, and he turns back to the ring-

 

*WHAM!!*

 

-to be flattened by a 218lb human missile, as Toxxic flies over the top rope with a tope con hilo!

 

“TOXX-IC SUCKS!”

 

“TOXX-IC SUCKS!”

 

“TOXX-IC SUCKS!”

 

The Straight-Edge Sensation comes back to his feet, and now Danny Williams is looking considerably worse for wear. As Nick Soapdish begins his count Toxxic grabs Williams by the hair and starts to pull him up, then Irish whips his opponent towards the steel ring post - but Williams reverses!

 

*CLANG!!*

 

“DAN-E!”

 

“DAN-E!”

 

“DAN-E!”

 

Toxxic’s head rebounds off the post and the Straight-Edge Sensation turns woozily around, eyes unfocused. Danny charges in, eager to follow up his advantage by crushing his opponent’s skull against the ringpost with an elbow smash, but Toxxic wakes up to the danger at the last moment and Williams-

 

*CRACK!!*

 

“ARRGGH!!”

 

-only succeeds in slamming his right arm into the steel as hard as he can as Toxxic ducks out of the way!

 

“No!” Comet yelps in despair. “Citizen Williams could have seriously damaged his arm, and on top of the injury he suffered in that submissions match on Lockdown...”

 

White-hot pain sears up Danny’s arm and the former World Champion staggers backwards, clutching at it with his left hand, but Toxxic desperately latches both hands around Williams’ right wrist and then swings the injured limb as hard as he can against the post again!

 

*CRACK!!*

 

“ARRGGH!!”

 

“BOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”

 

“The fans here in Nebraska taking righteous exception to Toxxic’s criminal actions!” Comet declares as the Straight-Edge Sensation rolls slowly under the bottom rope into the ring, still suffering from colliding with the steel post. “But thank goodness that Citizen Williams was able to stun the miscreant just before that unfortunate incident or Toxxic may have taken even more advantage of our former World Champion.”

 

“...Well, I-”

 

”Robert Riley, I do not want to hear what you have to say about taking advantage of former World Champions whilst Tom Flesher is in the building!!”

 

“What?” Riley asks, trying to look innocent and failing miserably.

 

‘SIX!’ Soapdish bellows while Danny nurses his injury on the outside and Toxxic manages to pull himself up in the ring, still holding his head. Williams looks up at the referee, still cradling his right arm; to go back in the ring now with only one serviceable arm would be to put himself at a serious disadvantage against his quicker opponent... but the only other option is to be counted out, and Danny Williams will never take that way out.

 

Especially not when there’s a World Title shot at stake.

 

‘SEV-’ Soapdish is cut off as Danny rolls under the bottom rope in his turn, but the moment the Louisville Elbower passes through the ropes Toxxic leaps to the attack, raining down (slightly shaky) stomps at the injured right arm. Danny does his best to shield the limb but despite his efforts several of the blows find their mark until Soapdish physically pulls Toxxic back to allow Danny time to get to his feet. Williams shakes out his right arm as he does so, trying to ascertain the damage and finding the prognosis bleak - the two shots against the ringpost in addition to the damage wreaked by the guard rail and Mike Van Siclen the previous wednesday have made the limb halfway between numb and useless and being excruciatingly painful. With a few minutes to adjust and let some of the pain wear off Danny could probably use it fairly normally again... but he knows that Toxxic won’t let him have that time.

 

Toxxic circles his slower, heavier opponent like a shark that smells blood. His head still hurts like hell from colliding with the ring post but he knows the fortuitous turn of events that led to Williams’ right arm becoming reinjured have not only effectively halved his opponent’s offence, but also potentially given him a direct path to victory. With this in mind Toxxic starts to move in, still wary of Williams but now with increased confidence.

 

“Citizens, this looks bleak for Danny Williams,” Comet notes as the two men manoeuvre around the ring. “He is being forced to keep his left side to Toxxic to prevent the rookie from getting at his injured right arm, but since he can only use his left arm at the moment that same positioning means that should Toxxic close in Danny will have very little backswing - and therefore very little power - on his famous elbows!”

 

“I’ve been trying to tell you that Williams is nothing without his elbows, but would you listen?” Riley sniffs. “He won’t have the no-DQ rules that he had on Lockdown to turn to!”

 

Toxxic scoots in closer to his opponent, evidently aware that Williams’ options are going to be very limited. For his part Williams reaches out and tries to grab with his left hand, but the slippery rookie dodges backwards and easily evades the Louisville Elbower’s grasp. Before Danny can fully recover his balance Toxxic darts back in and ducks under the (relatively) weak left-armed elbow smash Danny sends his way, coming up on Williams’ right-hand side and making a grab for the injured arm. Danny whips it out of Toxxic’s reach and takes a couple of steps backwards in order to get some breathing space, but Toxxic follows him right in-

 

*SMACK!*

 

-only to run straight into a left-arm elbow! But just as Comet predicted, Danny’s lack of backswing means the blow does no more than stagger Toxxic momentarily. Half-encouraged, half-worried, Danny strikes again-

 

*SMACK!*

 

-and again-

 

*SMACK!*

 

-but he is effectively having to use them like snap jabs, and the full devastating force just isn’t there. Nevertheless Toxxic seems slightly dazed, so Danny draws his left arm back in preparation for a full-power blow... and as he takes a step back with his left foot to get more distance, Toxxic dives in and latches into the right arm at the wrist before twisting it over his head in an arm-wringer!

 

“BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”

 

“TOXX-IC SUCKS!”

 

“TOXX-IC SUCKS!”

 

“TOXX-IC SUCKS!”

 

Danny tries to pull away from the shooting pain that surges through the limb, but Toxxic has both hands tightly gripping the former World Champion’s wrist and he uses his slight height advantage to raise the arm uncomfortably high. Williams attempts to get to the ropes with his left arm, but they are too far away for his relatively short reach and Toxxic simply increases the torque in response. Before Williams can try any other means of escaping the simple but effective hold the Straight-Edge Sensation clasps the arm across his chest and drops backwards, slamming Danny into the mat with a single-arm DDT!

 

“I love it!” Riley exults. “The one and only form of technical wrestling that Toxxic knows is how to work an arm, and he’s breaking Danny Williams’ in at least three places, Comet! Soon we won’t have to worry about Williams for, ooh...” the colourful colour commentator considers for a moment, taking into account the fact that this is the SWF, “...a month or so?”

 

Toxxic may not actually be breaking Danny’s arm but it certainly feels that way to the former World Champion as the damage is being wrought on the elbow, one of the few areas on his body unprotected by his unnatural muscle mass. Williams grits his teeth and forces himself to his knees as Toxxic rises to his feet, but the British rookie hasn’t finished yet and still has a death-grip on his wrist - abruptly Toxxic simply drops and rolls, corkscrewing down to the mat, wrenching Danny’s arm still further and driving his face back into the canvas again!

 

“Citizens, this is very worrying indeed,” Comet says in tones of some concern. “If only Danny Williams hadn’t tried that running elbow smash against Toxxic on the outside...”

 

“But he only did that because Toxxic had frustrated him!” Riley states accurately. “This entire match has gone to the exact plan of the Hot Commodity - he laid everything out beforehand,” he continues, somewhat less accurately and ignoring Toxxic’s adherence to the noble British art of winging it.

 

Toxxic climbs back to his feet again, still with Danny’s wrist in tow, and where Danny’s wrist goes the rest of Danny inevitably follows shortly after. The former World Champion tries to make a break for the ropes again and by using his superior bulk he manages to get a step or two, but then Toxxic simply lashes a boot into the trapped arm and cuts Williams off by refocusing his attention on the agony that is his right arm. With the Louisville Elbower brought up short Toxxic makes a dash for the nearest turnbuckles, half-dragging Danny behind him, then runs up them and leaps off...

 

*CRASH!!*

 

...CRUSHING Danny’s arm against the canvas with a flying legdrop! The impact feels like it has jarred bones loose for the unfortunate former World Champion, but Williams grits his teeth and tries to fight through the pain.

 

“Toxxic’s going higher-risk now,” Riley notes. “We’re going to see something pretty special any minute Comet; I can feel it...”

 

Toxxic still has a hold of Danny’s wrist, but the combined abuse of two brutal matches has left Williams without many options at countering out; he’s more concerned with not letting his arm fall off. So when Toxxic runs for the turnbuckles again Danny isn’t able to tug his opponent off balance or resist - he simply watches as the rookie nimbly springboards back off the top rope and lands neatly astride his shoulders, facing forwards...

 

*BANG!!*

 

...then snaps backwards, spiking Danny’s skull into the mat with a reverse hurricanrana! Williams lands on his front as Toxxic finally releases his arm, then grabs the Louisville Elbower’s shoulders and rolls him onto his back for the pin...

 

ONE!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

TWO!!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

THR-

Kickout!

 

“DAN-E!”

 

“DAN-E!”

 

“DAN-E!”

 

The Omaha crowd rise to their feet in salute of their hero as Williams kicks out, but Toxxic was closer to getting a three count this time. The Straight-Edge Sensation doesn’t seem annoyed at his lack of success however; instead he pulls Williams up by his long hair before grabbing that right arm again and twisting it up into a vicious hammerlock. Williams’ face shows renewed pain, but over at the commentary table Comet is getting worried and Riley is getting excited.

 

“You do know when Toxxic uses a hammerlock, don’t you? Don’t you?” Riley asks his partner eagerly.

 

“Unfortunately... yes,” Comet reluctantly replies.

 

Sure enough, Toxxic reaches forward with his left arm and hooks a reverse headlock on the shorter Williams... then grabs Danny’s trapped right wrist with his left hand, locking in the Dragon Sleeper and hammerlock combination known as the Repeat To Fade!

 

“Beautiful!” Riley exults. “With Danny’s arm as damaged as it is not even that roid-enhanced freak stands a chance of breaking Toxxic’s grip!”

 

Danny struggles, but Riley’s comments are proving accurate - despite his theoretically superior strength his mangled right arm is unable to break free, and the constriction of the blood to his brain is rapidly causing his head to swim. But Danny Williams is unwilling to let the quest for his record fourth World Title end like this and he pushes backwards with all the strength in his legs. Toxxic is driven back into the nearest corner where the impact of Danny’s shoulder not only drives the air from the lungs of the straight-edger but also further traumatises his ribs, and Toxxic involuntarily releases his hold which allows Williams to scramble away!

 

“He did it!” Comet yells. “No-one has ever broken the Repeat To Fade before, but Citizen Williams managed to find a way out!”

 

Toxxic staggers out of the corner, clutching his ribs and glaring daggers at Danny Williams who has again taken up a position with his left side facing the straight-edger. Williams looks woozy but determined, but Toxxic knows now exactly what the limits of Danny’s left-arm elbows are and he moves in cockily-

 

*CRACK!!*

 

-and Danny steps up and NAILS him with a RIGHT-ARM ELBOW SMASH!

 

“DAN-E!”

 

“DAN-E!”

 

“DAN-E!”

 

“What!?” Riley yelps as Toxxic crumples backwards to the canvas, a thin stream of blood coming from one nostril. “How did Danny do that? His right arm should be useless!”

 

“It more or less is Robert,” Comet answers excitedly as Williams falls to his knees, agony writ large on his features as he clutches his right elbow, “but Citizen Williams took a risk that paid off! Toxxic was no longer expecting an attack from that quarter and his complacency allowed Danny to strike to maximum advantage! The only question is, will our former World Champion be able to capitalise?”

 

Face still screwed up in pain, Danny covers his opponent by simply lying over the Straight-Edge Sensation, right arm held gingerly away from the canvas and using his left to hook the leg...

 

ONE!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

TWO!!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

THREEE-

Kickout!

 

But stunned though Toxxic is the shot was not enough to do the job, and he gets a shoulder up. Danny swears quietly - he is not looking forward to wrestling the rest of this match with only one arm and was hoping that his last-ditch attack would end it, but it was not to be. However, if Danny Williams was a man to give up easily then his career would have ended after his first unsuccessful World Title defence, let alone go through three of them. In spite of everything he is still stronger and tougher than Toxxic, and some part of Williams’ pysche wants to make the rookie know this.

 

Danny pushes himself up and backs away from his opponent, positioning himself so that he will be directly behind Toxxic should the straight-edger get up facing the same way he is now, facedown on the mat from where he kicked out of the pin. Sure enough the Brit shakily starts to rise and manages to get up to one knee... begins to stand...

 

...and Danny Williams EXPLODES out of the ropes and hammers his left arm into the back of Toxxic’s neck with a devastating enzui-lariat!

 

“DAN-E!”

 

“DAN-E!”

 

“DAN-E!”

 

Toxxic’s body slams back into the mat, but Danny doesn’t let him rise on his own this time. Instead he hauls the rookie up forcefully, then Irish whips him towards the far turnbuckles. Even in Toxxic’s semi-stunned state some instincts will still kick in and the straight-edger springs upwards to the top turnbuckle and then flies back with a diving clothesline-

 

*SMACK!!*

 

-but this time it is Danny’s turn to swat his opponent out of the air, countering the Role Reversal with a dropkick! The landing jars his arm again but Toxxic’s landing is worse, and now Danny is on a roll. Once more he hauls Toxxic up and this time positions himself behind the rookie. Danny’s right arm is still killing him, but he’s got enough left for one last big move... and he cinches the rear waistlock on tight.

 

“Dangerous German!” Comet cries in anticipation. “Citizen Williams is about to send Toxxic’s aspirations of getting a World Title shot into a nosedive - or should that be a neckdive?”

 

“No, it should never be that...” Riley growls anxiously.

 

Danny sets his feet wide apart, pops his hips and wrenches upwards and backwards, falling as he executes the move... and Toxxic leaves the mat to go flying into the air. It isn’t clear whether Danny was trying to lock his hands and failed due to his weak arm or whether he was simply going for the Dangerous version outright. Either way, Toxxic does what Toxxic almost always does when someone tries to German suplex him.

 

He flips through the move and lands, still woozy in the head but otherwise unaffected by it, on his feet.

 

*THWAP*

 

Williams is no fool, and his years of ring experience mean he knows the difference between the sound of someone landing on their feet and the crash on someone landing on their shoulders. So he struggles up from his back and turns, seeking to keep the advantage and already scrambling towards where he knows Toxxic is.

 

And as Danny turns, off-balance, moving too fast and therefore playing right into the straight-edger’s hands, Toxxic slides in with a soccer tackle to slice his shins from under him-

 

*CRACK*

 

-and send the former World Champion tumbling head-over-heels to land on the mat.

 

*WHAM!!*

 

Again, Williams knows what he has to do. He struggles to get to his feet, to get to a position where he can fight back, but he’s at a disadvantage. He’s bulkier and slower, he’s just had the wind knocked out of him and his legs hurt like hell. He staggers up to his feet... but by the time he does so, Toxxic is waiting for him. The Straight-Edge Sensation’s ribs are burning, and a lifting move like the Caffeine Bomb or the Toxxic Shock Syndrome is out of the question. So he grabs Williams’ wrist and twists it up in a hammerlock again, cinches in the Dragon Sleeper a moment later and locks the two together...

 

...then before Danny can make another move, Toxxic simply wraps his legs around his opponent’s waist and falls backwards. The impact crushes the straight-edger’s ribs, but this time he’s expecting it and grimly holds on. His head and ribs hurt too bad to let Danny escape - this needs to end now.

 

“Repeat To Fade!” Riley yells in delight as the Rosenblatt Stadium starts chanting in support of Danny Williams. “There’s no escape this time!”

 

Danny strives to get his right arm free but to no avail, and his left arm is uselessly trapped at his side in Toxxic’s bodyscissors. He desperately tries pushing with his legs but their combined weight is too heavy, and too irregular a shape to be propelled across the canvas. The pain in his right arm is swiftly growing to be excruciating, his vision is starting to blur as his brain is rapidly deprived of blood. But Danny Williams is a fighter to the last, and he does not tap out.

 

“DAN-E!”

 

...and he does not tap out.

 

“DAN-E!”

 

...and he does not tap out.

 

“DAN-E!”

 

 

 

 

 

 

...and he goes limp.

 

*DING-DING-DING!*

 

“BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”

 

The guitars of Lostprophets’ ring out over the Rosenblatt Stadium but it takes several seconds for Nick Soapdish to persuade Toxxic to relax his grip. By the time he does so, Jet is already in the ring and congratulating him whilst Funyon has raised his mic to his lips...

 

“Ladies and gentlemen, here is your winner and Joint Number One Contender to the SWF World Heavyweight Title... TOXX-IIIC!!”

 

“A new era is here!” Riley yells in delight. “Williams is defeated, Toxxic is king! And we still have Flesher smacking Johnny Dangerous around to come! Can this evening get any better, Comet?”

 

“Considerably,” the superhero mutters dejectedly. “Citizens, stay tuned - we’ll be back after this commercial break.”

 

The last thing the cameras focus on before the adverts start is Toxxic’s face, and the lopsided grin that occupies the right-hand side of it.

 

FADE OUT

[the.weej 0]

Toxxic’s locker room is filled with steam from the shower that recently ended, and the topless Straight-Edge Sensation himself is rummaging through his bag trying to find his t-shirt when his mobile goes off. He picks it up, noting that the caller display reads ‘Jet’.

 

“Eh up,” Toxxic says, having located his shirt. “Yeah, just finished - you got the car? OK cool, see you in a minute love. Bye.”

 

As he has been talking the Brit has managed to pull his shirt on over his hair (still spiked but having drooped somewhat in the heat and humidity of the shower). He picks the black holdall up off the bench, slips it over one shoulder and pulls open the door-

 

-and comes face to face with ‘Hollywood’ Spike Jenkins.

 

“What the bloody hell do you want?” Toxxic demands, dropping his bag to free his right arm up.

 

“Whoah, whoah - chill, man,” Spike protests, holding up his hands. “I got no beef with you, I just wanna talk. In there?” he adds hopefully, pointing past the straight-edger into the locker room. Toxxic tilts his head to one side and studies his opponent from Lockdown... then slowly nods.

 

“OK. But make it quick.”

 

*********************************************************************

 

“Y’know, after our match on Lockdown I was thinking,” Spike begins.

 

“First time for everything,” Toxxic mutters, causing Spike to give him a pained look.

 

“Dude, just listen OK?” Spike takes a deep breath and starts again. “I’ve been around here for way longer than you, and you’ve already done way more than me. And up til now that didn’t really bother me, y’know? Cos the fans have been behind me for ages, and I was giving and getting respect-”

 

“Spare me,” the straight-edger groans, passing a hand over his eyes.

 

“See?” Spike demands, “that’s what I’m talking about, man! You’ve got no respect for anyone, the fans all hate you, the guys backstage hate you, you hate everyone and you STILL keep winning! I wrestle for the fans, it’s like you wrestle in spite of the fans, dude! And it’s not like you cheat either, you beat me fair and square.”

 

“What your point?” Toxxic asks, apparently uncertain whether to be flattered or annoyed by the odd praise coming from Jenkins. Spike sighs.

 

“Dude... I’ve had enough. I’ve been smiling at the fans, getting them behind me, everyone in the building wants me to win... and then I come up against you and your ‘hate everyone’ vibe, I wrestle my ass off and I still lose. And it’s not just you - I came real close to winning against Johnny, and I beat Maddix non-title but then couldn’t win the title match.” Spike pauses and seems to consider what he wants to say next.

 

“Dude, it’s like this. I’m not getting anywhere doing it my way. People like me and all, but if the choice is being popular and crap or disliked and champ... bring on the title match, y’know? I wanna know how to do it your way, so I can do what I love doing and win at the same time.”

 

Toxxic looks at the dejected California native standing in front of him, and considers. Then slowly, a familiar lopsided grin spreads up the right hand side of his face.

 

“You’re on.”

Edited June 29, 2004 by realitycheck

[the.weej 0]

Back from a commercial break, SWF Smarkdown returns into the Rosenblatt Stadium in Omaha where the fans are going crazy as usual. However, what isn't usual are the four T.V monitors which during the break have been wheeled into ringside, and placed around the ring, one on each side. Meanwhile referee Anthony Michael Hall is standing in the ring, holding Landon Maddix's newly acquired ICTV Championship belt...sign enough, that the Boiler Room Brawl is upcoming.

 

"Welcome back to Smarkdown." an unusually somber sounding Cyclone Comet greets. "As I'm sure you're aware, in just a few moments we're going to cut backstage...for the Boiler Room Brawl Bobbo."

 

"Ridiculous."

 

"....as you're also aware, Bobby Riley is none too happy about his 'golden boy' getting stuck in a confined space with the unpredictable Jamie Drazon. Not to mention the fact there will be no entourage to help him tonight."

 

"Equally ridiculous!" Riley wails. "It's totally unfair! Would you expect J-Lo to do a concert without her entourage!?!"

 

"Are you comparing that primadonna, divaish woman...to J-Lo?"

 

"Oh, tee hee Cyclone. No surprise you're so happy about this."

 

"I'm not HAPPY about it. Boiler Room Brawls have proven over the years to be brutal, career shortening matches. I'm more...well, let's say I believe in karma..."

 

While the token Comet/Riley arguement goes on, the camera has been panning around the crowd, trying to make as many people happy as possible...

 

 

...but not for long, as the camera cuts away from ringside and to the backstage area. More specifically, it cuts to a green door with an unneccessarily large 'BOILER ROOM' sign on it.

 

"Well...there is the Boiler Room..."

 

"Are you sure Comet? How can you tell!?!"

 

"Sarcasm aside, and ignored, Jamie Drazon is apparantely in the boiler room already. We're just waiting on the champion now. Once both men are in the room, the match will start. The first man to collect the ICTV Title belt from Citizen Micheal Hall will be the champion..."

 

 

---------------------------------------------------------

 

Speaking of which, the current champion has finally arrived, turning the final corner towards the ominious Boiler Room. Behind him, perhaps unsurprisingly are Chris Card, Megan Skye and Natasha...all trying to provide Landon with advice and encouragement. Getting to the door, Maddix stops and takes a deep breath as Card stops beside him and pats him on the back.

 

"Remember the deal..."

 

And with those mysterious words, Maddix enters the boiler room ever-so cautiously and slowly closes the door behind him, trying not to make a sound.

 

Comet: "Remember the deal? What does that mean?"

 

Once inside, Maddix begins to look around the relatively spacious boiler-room for any signs of movement. Seeing none, Landon takes another deep breath...knowing that although he'd prefer to leave now, it'd be more productive to leave Drazon laying now...and begins to creep forward down the ramp. On his way, he's smart enough to pick up a 2x4 for protection which seems to fill him with a little more confidence.

 

Until Jay Dawg steps out from behind a stack of pipes, smiling widely.

 

Suddenly the 2x4 doesn't seem so powerful to Landon. But it's the best he's got, so continues to wield it as threateningly as his shaking body will allow him, while Drazon simply walks forward towards the champion.

 

"St...st...stay back! I'm not afraid to use this!"

 

JD just laughs, as he reaches into the back pocket of his jeans and pulls out a nightstick!

 

"Right back at'cha kid."

 

Maddix mumbles an expletive and looks down at his 2x4...before tossing it to the side and making a beeline for the door! Drazon is one step ahead of him though, charging towards the door and is just able to tackle Landon to the floor before he can make an escape. A desperate Maddix begs off, as JD drags him away from the door and further into the boiler room, a wide smile on his face as he does so. Once JD releases him, Maddix tries to scramble away again...

 

 

*OOOOF!*

 

...but gets clubbed in the ribs with the nightstick! Drazon grins again, as the tosses the nightstick aside sending an echoing clunk around the room. Holding his gut, Maddix moans and groans in pain as meanwhile Drazon takes his time in stepping around him, creating a block between Landon and the door. Maddix uses that 'block'...i.e Drazon...to drag himself back up, before firing a weak right hand to the gut. JD simply shrugs it off and grabs Landon by the hair before throwing him into the rail on the ramp...

 

 

*CLANK!*

 

...which promptly collapses, sending Landon flying onto a heap of wooden palettes!!!

 

Comet: "Oh my!"

 

Maddix wails out in pain, falling off the palettes and to the floor as Drazon follows after him. Already Landon looks to be out of his depth, taking a kick to the head from JD...who turns moments later to grab a wooden palette and drop it to the floor. Again Landon tries to crawl away, but gets caught by JD and pulled to his feet. A right hand has little effect on the challenger...neither does a knee. So Maddix goes to the last resort...a thumb to the eye, and a boot to the balls!

 

"Ooohhhhh!"

 

Drazon groans and collapses into the palette pile. Landon is quick to grab him by the hair and send him head-first into them, before starting a hunt for a decent weapon which ends quickly as he finds a metal pipe. Turning around, Maddix wields that pipe and swings...

 

 

...but Drazon ducks! Maddix ends up swinging right around, straight into a Shotei-style palm strike! The pipe goes flying, Maddix goes flying...as meanwhile, JD grabs one of the palettes and breaks a length of wood off. However, before he can use it, Maddix has disappeared out of sight.

 

"Where'd he go?" Drazon asks the cameraman, who just shrugs. "Where'd you go Landon!?!"

 

Obviously Landon doesn't answer...wherever he is. So Drazon is left to search around, still clutching the piece of wood...

 

 

*CRACK!*

 

...but suddenly gets a piece of wood broken over his back by Maddix, who suddenly re-appears as if by magic. JD collapses forward, but takes the pain like a MAN~ and lets out a wry chuckle. Shocked, Maddix grabs him by the arm and looks for an irish whip. It's quickly reversed however, with Drazon pulling Landon forward into a short-arm clothesline! Maddix bounces off the cold, concrete floor like a ball, getting right back up which isn't best advised, as JD nails him with a second clothesline! This time Landon doesn't get up, preferring instead to crawl forwards towards one half of the wooden 'plank' he broke moments ago. But JD stops him, dragging him to his feet and administering an irish whip of his own...

 

*CRACK!*

 

...sending La Cucaracha straight into the pile of palettes! Maddix staggers away, into Drazon's clutches again for another irsh whip...

 

*CRAAASH!!!*

 

...denting a handily placed filing cabinet!

 

"Howd'ya like that pretty boy!?!"

 

Maddix doesn't like it...infact, he's on the verge of tears as he collapses to a kneeling position. Again Jamie smiles, and backs up to take a charge at Maddix for the Shining Black. Landon is able to duck however, leaving Drazon's finishing move to connect with the cabinet...and even that doesn't no sell, denting severely! Jay Dawg quickly shakes off the pain in his foot, as Maddix has had enough and decides to play some cat-and-mouse by running off.

 

Comet: "That may be Landon's best possible tactic. Run like hell."

 

Riley: "Tactics!?! In THIS type of match!?! Against THIS nutjob!?!"

 

Clearly tiring of all this attempted stalling, Drazon glares into the empty space in front of him. Whever Landon has gone, he's made sure to hide himself. Angrily JD walks forward, keeping relative caution as he does so.

 

"Come on Landon..."

 

Drazon reaches what seems to be some sort of holder for a heap of pipes, smiles at his luck and picks up one thin, metal pipe from the stack...

 

 

 

...which Landon Maddix is hiding under!

 

 

Comet: "Look at that cowardly La..."

 

Riley: "SSSHHH! He's trying to hide..."

 

Comet: "Drazon can't hear us."

 

Riley: "I know that! I'm just trying to build some atmosphere. Jerk."

 

"Come on Landon...there's no point in hiding. Sooner or later, you're going to..."

 

*CLANK!*

 

 

 

*KEEEE - RRRRAAAASSSSSSSSHHHH!!*

 

Suddenly, Drazon weilds around with the pipe which collapses the structure holding the pipes, and causes them all to come crashing down on top of Landon. You'd expect JD to be shocked. Or surprised. But instead, he just laughs, showing Maddix that he knew where he was the whole time.

 

"...get hurt."

 

Maddix groans in pain, as Drazon lifts up the pipe...

 

*CLANK!*

 

...before smashing it over those that cover Maddix! Landon quickly scrambles out from under the pipes, dragging himself to his knees. JD meanwhile exchanges his pipe for a smaller one, which is easier to swing. But he doesn't get a chance to use it, as Maddix lunges forward and hits a punch to the ribs. Drazon doubles over, as Maddix claws around and grabs a pipe, bringing it between JD's legs.

 

Comet: "Oh no...not that..."

 

 

*clank!*

 

"OOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!"

 

The crowd in the arena groan, as does JD in the Boiler Room. Landon meanwhile pulls himself up, clearly still groggy from the pipe shower he experienced. He has enough presence of mind to grab Jay Dawg by the head and jeans, wheel him around and slam him into the wall however. JD smacks off the wall, stumbling back into Maddix's grasp and quickly getting sent right back into the wall. Not wanting a third visit, Drazon stumbles away from Maddix as best possible, and around the corner of the wall.

 

Riley: "See...this is why this match stinks. Jay Dawg is a hardcore freak. He can take this punishment. Landon..."

 

Comet: "Can't?"

 

Riley: "No, he can. He just doesn't have to! Like Toxxic..."

 

Suddenly, confidence fills Maddix's over-inflated head as he decides to follow after Jay Dawg...

 

 

*PHHHHFFFFTT!!*

 

...which proves a mistake, as JD lets off a fire extinguisher towards Maddix's path. The champ is unable to get his arms up in time, taking the dehabilitating smoke to the face. Drazon meanwhile releases the nozzle of the extinguisher...and rips it off the wall, before charging forwards...

 

*CLUNK!*

 

...and nailing Maddix over the head with it! Landon hits the floor like a sack of spuds, with the fire extinguisher doing the same just a foot to the side of him. JD is still up though...and taking his belt off. Seeing it, and thinking god knows what, Maddix freaks and tries his best to scramble away in his dis-orientated state. He doesn't get far before JD has the belt off and loops it around Landon's throat, using it to choke the ICTV Champ!

 

Riley: "You see! He's a sick freak!"

 

Comet: "Well, it didn't help that Landon got him riled up earlier..."

 

Riley: "That's no excuse for this kind of sadism!"

 

Frantically Maddix struggles to break free from Jay Dawg's grip. But the belt around his throat halts any progress he looks to make...not to mention choking the life out of him. Still Maddix tries to crawl away, as Jay Dawg releases the belt and instead starts to choke Maddix with his forearm. Knowing he's in trouble, Landon swings wildly back with a series of elbows which Jay Dawg avoids each time. Landon keeps swinging though...

 

...until Drazon catches one elbow, and locks the arm up!

 

Comet: "Katahajimé!"

 

Riley: "Drazon's trying to choke Maddix unconscious!"

 

Comet: "That's a smart tactic Bobbo. If Maddix is unconscious, he's not going to stop JD from escaping!"

 

 

"UUGGGGGGHHHHHUGHHH"

 

Maddix coughs and sputters as Jay Dawg steps over Maddix's back and attempts to add a scissorlock to the hold. Fighting the hold, Landon squirms to his feet and starts to move himself and Jay Dawg towards the door where he can try and escape. But that's easier said than done, as JD clings on with all he has. As the seconds pass, Landon visibly begins to weaken, slumping back down to one knee as JD wrenches away.

 

 

 

"OOOOOOOHHHHHHHH!!!"

 

Suddenly Jay Dawg groans in pain and releases the hold, as a right leg belonging to Landon finds it's way up and between JD's legs. The Hardcore Maniac doubles over, as Maddix finds himself just metres away from the exit door...but mere inches away lays JD's nightstick, and you can guess which Maddix goes for.

 

Riley: "Yeah...WAFFLE HIM!"

 

Grabbing the nightstick, Maddix lines Jay Dawg up and swings with the weapon. JD sees it coming though, ducking underneath the shot and nailing a punch to the gut. Now Landon doubles over as JD grabs hold of the nightstick and yanks it out of Maddix's hands, quickly clocking him in the forehead with it!

 

Riley: "NO! That's not fair!"

 

Comet: "You were all for Maddix using it!"

 

Riley: "That was different!"

 

Down goes Maddix, and seemingly JD has done enough to appease himself...and decides to go for the door. But somehow, Maddix has enough left to grab desperate hold of JD's jeans. More irritated than prohibited, JD turns around and stomps Landon in the head...not once but twice, before pulling his leg away. Now Maddix is in trouble, as he's annoyed JD. Walking off to where the wooden palettes lay, Drazon picks up a couple of them and drops them to the small ramp leading to the door. Landon meanwhile has got to all fours and has crawled over. Jay Dawg nails him with another kick and pulls him up, looking down at the palettes and smiling.

 

"Do I deserve the belt yet, kid?"

 

Maddix tries to answer but can't...partly because Drazon is hooking him up and taking him instantly over with a snap suplex...

 

 

 

*CRAAAACCK!*

 

...ONTO THE WOODEN PALETTES!!!

 

The crowd in the arena cheer wildly at what they see, as Maddix groans in pain amongst the now broken palettes. Jay Dawg meanwhile shrugs Landon off and decides to go for the door.

 

Comet: "Here he comes Riley! Jay Dawg's coming for the belt!"

 

Getting to the door, Jay Dawg stops for a moment to look back at Maddix...who is still laid up on the palettes, unable to stop the escape from JD. With a wry smile, JD wrenches open the boiler room door and steps out into the corridor...

 

 

*SMACK!*

 

...but suddenly collapses to the floor!

 

Comet: "Woah...wha...what happened!?!"

 

Riley: "He slipped."

 

As JD lays in the doorway holding his chest, the shot cuts to the camera on the outside of the Boiler Room...

 

 

 

...where Chris Card is standing over Jay Dawg!!

 

 

"BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!"

 

Comet: "That's what happened! Chris Card happened!"

 

Riley: "You don't know that for sure."

 

Comet: "He's standing over Citizen Drazon smiling. You do the math..."

 

Riley: "He's smiling because that clumsy Drazon slipped."

 

Boos continue to fill the arena, as Card looks up from Drazon...and realises Maddix is still laid out on the palettes. Cursing, Card scampers into the boiler room and tries to help Maddix up, who is nearly in tears from the searing pain in his back.

 

 

Drazon meanwhile is back on his hands and knees, and slowly crawls off down the corridor. Card doesn't see it, too busy trying to get Maddix up from the palettes.

 

Comet: "Well...Drazon is crawling away, but can he make it out here before Maddix can get to him?"

 

Drazon makes it about halfway down the corridor, as finally Maddix staggers out from through the Boiler Room door...splinters in his back, a grimace on his face but determination not to let his title go. Maddix is quicker, staggering over to where Jay Dawg crawls...and eventually dives on top of Jay Dawg, offloading with right hands. Jay Dawg is able to spin out though, landing on top of Maddix and firing away with his own right hands!

 

Comet: "They're brawling in the corridor!"

 

Riley: "This looks like clearance day at Bloomingdale's!"

 

The punches continue flying, as meanwhile another commotion has filled the corridor. Suddenly Toxxic, Ace Lezaire, The Hollywood Boulevard and various other heels have vacated their locker room and begin to cheer Maddix on. Back up come both men and Jay Dawg hits a right hand, sending Maddix staggering down the hall and past his supporters. Another right takes Landon further down the hall, where by now Alan Clark, Edward James, Johnny Dangerous and the face crew are out to cheer Jay Dawg!

 

Riley: "Now it really does look like Bloomingdale's...look at the ugly on display right now!"

 

Jay Dawg feeds off of the support and swings with another punch. Maddix is able to block with a boot though, before sending JD face first into the wall! Rebounding, JD instinctively swings with a clothesline, which Maddix ducks before sending Drazon into the opposite wall! Finally JD goes down, giving Landon chance to scurry off down the hall towards the ring.

 

 

"JAY DAWG! JAY DAWG! JAY DAWG!"

 

Hearing the crowd nearby, Maddix finds another spurt of speed. But little does he know Drazon has too, almost sprinting down the hall. Maddix turns a corner, leading towards the 'go' position...but suddenly feels a hand on his shoulder, which then spins him around. That hand belongs of course to Jay Dawg, who clamps on the Iron Claw!!!

 

 

"YEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!"

 

Riley: "No...not his FACE~!"

 

Maddix feels the paralysing pain instantly, but before his body can give out he manages to hit a knee to the gut. A second knee sets him free, and quickly he wheels Drazon around and slams him into a nearby catering table! Food, drink and packaging collectively go flying as Jay Dawg recoils...

 

...and expertly elbows Maddix in the face!

 

Now, both Maddix and JD look dazed. It's Jay Dawg who reacts first, sending Landon face first into the table and sending more food flying! Landon staggers away from the table, but unfortunately for him he also staggers away from the direction of ringside. Instead he goes flying across the main backstage area, and towards a single door amongst an otherwise barren wall. Taking a step back, JD wonders whever to go for the belt...but instead decides that kicking Maddix's ass would be much more pleasing, and walks right back over to him.

 

Comet: "This may be a mistake Bobbo. Jay Dawg could have got the belt..."

 

Riley: "Could, whoulda, shoulda...all that matters is in the end, the RIGHT champion wins. And we all know who that is."

 

Comet: "I'm sure WE do."

 

Maddix holds his hands up in an attempt to beg off and get a timeout. No surprise that that doesn't work, as JD moves back in and hauls Landon off the floor. A palm strike sends Landon stumbling back a step and leaves him wide-open for an irish whip, that sends Landon into...

 

 

*DOOOF!*

 

...and through the door. Landon carries on going, tumbling over a heavy oak table and nearly falling into the lap of...

 

 

...Alexander Zenon!

 

Comet: "And now this fight has spread into the Commisioner's office!"

 

Riley: "INTERIM Commisioner."

 

 

"Look...er, I'm sorry man...I'll call you back."

 

Caught in the middle of a call, Zenon quickly gets off his phone and leaps out of his chair, as Jay Dawg enters the office too. Taking a fan off of Zenon's desk (hey, it IS June), Maddix turns and jabs at JD with it. Drazon sidesteps easily though and spears Landon, up and OVER the desk!

 

"Do you MIND!?!" wails Zenon.

 

Apparantly Drazon doesn't, as he lays in some heavy right hands to the grounded La Cucaracha. Even though his office is being destroyed, Zenon almost manages a wry smile at the carnage he has created as he steps out of the office to safety. Meanwhile, JD gets up off the floor and yanks a framed picture of Zenon off the wall.

 

"Have you met this guy? He packs quite a 'punch'..."

 

JD prepares to smash the picture over Landon's head as he pulls himself up onto his feet...

 

 

*SMAASSSSSHHHH!!!*

 

...but Maddix moves, and the picture ends up smashing over the desk! Apparantly cut, JD growls and checks on his hand...which indeed has been slashed by the flying glass. Slowly JD turns around to take his frustrations out on Maddix. But Landon is prepared, pushing Zenon's swivel chair into the ribs and legs of Drazon!

 

Comet: "This is crazy! So much for the Boiler Room Brawl...this has turned into an Office Brawl!"

 

Riley: "Didn't Landon win that last month?"

 

Comet: "Yeah. Ok then...a Commisioner's Office Brawl?"

 

Riley: ".....can't remember any of those before. Quick, call the copyright agency!"

 

Comet: "It was MY idea."

 

Riley: ".....we'll split the profits."

 

Comet: "Deal!"

 

Collapsing back into the desk, Drazon swings with a punch which misses the target by a mile. Maddix lands another knee to the gut before taking the fan again...

 

*CRACK!*

 

 

...smashing Drazon over the head with it! This time Drazon topples back, all the way over the table and down to the floor. Landon vaults the table and grabs the challenger, sending him quickly out the door with a shove before grabbing the door itself. Slowly JD pulls himself up and tries to stagger back towards Landon...

 

*CRACK!*

 

...BUT LANDON SLAMS THE DOOR IN HIS FACE!!!

 

 

"OOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!"

 

Comet: "OH MY WORD~!"

 

Riley: "Nice catchphrase Comet..."

 

Drazon collapses almost comically to the floor of the backstage area, as the door re-opens and out steps Landon Maddix, grinning from ear to ear. Quickly he lands a stomp to the ribs before walking right past JD, and beginning to walk a little wobbly towards the door...the wrestlers grouping around the nearest safe haven and the heels amongst them cheering him on. But no sooner has Landon reached the catering table again, Drazon begins to stir and get back to his feet. Cursing, Maddix stops by the table and yells at Drazon to bring it on...and despite seeing serious stars, that is exactly what JD does.

 

Comet: "How is Citizen Drazon even standing after that door hit him in the face like a Warner Brothers cartoon?"

 

Riley: "He's a FREAK!"

 

Maddix meets Drazon with a boot quickly, before dragging him nearer the table and attempting a scoop slam. But his weakened condition prevents Maddix from lifting the challenger, and in the end he simply gives up...preferring instead to slam JD's face off the table. This time Drazon doesn't immediately fire back. He does immediately collapse back though, hitting the back of his head nastily on the cold, hard floor. Assuming that's enough, again Landon begins to walk off and sees the steps leading to the stage in sight.

 

Comet: "Here we go...Landon Maddix is coming for the belt."

 

Riley: "Run Landon...RUN~!"

 

Comet: "You've been waiting to do that all night, haven't you?"

 

Reaching the steps, Maddix stumbles a little, not realising just how much the battle has taken out of him so far in terms of energy reserve. But he shakes it off, and begins to climb the set of five steps...

 

 

"HEY!"

 

Landon stops, turning around in a mix of frustration and despair as he sees Drazon getting back to his feet.

 

"You're not gonna wait for me?"

 

"Aw, crap..."

 

Maddix suddenly makes a bolt for the curtain, almost tripping on the steps in his haste as meanwhile Drazon begins chase.

 

Riley: "Come on Landon...you can out-run him!"

 

Comet: "He has to get up the steps first!"

 

Suddenly the camera cuts into the arena, where the crowd sit in a majority of silence...be it from boredom or interest. Seeing the shot on the big screens cut to the arena however, they pop, knowing the action is heading there way. A matter of seconds pass, seeming much longer in actuality, as suddenly the curtains ripple and out steps...

 

 

 

 

...JAY DAWG!

 

"YEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!"

 

The challenger is greeted by the crowd, as he takes a few steps forward and tries to shake ome remaining codwebs out of his system.

 

Riley: "Wha..where did Landon go!?!"

 

Comet: "I guess Jay Dawg caught him. Maddix needs to buy one of those Stepmasters to get some practise it seems."

 

Drazon continues to move forwards, down the aisle, as suddenly the curtains ripple again and Landon Maddix stumbles onto the stage. Quickly the fans start shouting warnings at Drazon, who turns and reacts in time for Landon to dive at him with a flying forearm...

 

 

...only for JD to catch him, and powerslam Maddix to the steel ramp!

 

"JAY DAWG! JAY DAWG! JAY DAWG!"

 

Landon is back down and seemingly not moving any time soon, as Jay Dawg checks on his right hand...now covered in deep, thick red blood from the glass picture he broke over it. But to be honest, JD doesn't care. He's the HARDCORE MANIAC~! And, as such, he begins his walk to the ring with a smile on his face as blood drips to his side.

 

Comet: "Drazon is just a few feet away!"

 

Riley: "Yeah, if a few constitutes twenty to thirty."

 

Nearly at the bottom of the ramp, Drazon can see the end in sight. But by now, Maddix has gotten back to his feet and with all the energy he has left, he is literally sprinting down the aisle. JD doesn't see him and promptly gets wiped out with a running clothesline, sending him sprawling and rolling forward towards the ring. Landon meanwhile sees a chance, and looks to enter the ring...

 

 

...but Jay Dawg grabs Maddix by the ankle and pulls Maddix back to the floor! With a big palm strike, JD sends the champion reeling back up the ramp, before turning and attempting to enter the ring...

 

 

 

...but Landon scrambles forward, and stops Jamie from entering the ring fully!

 

Comet: "Pure desperation is taking over these two men. They're both so close to the belt!"

 

Riley: "One guy has to hit a big move, and then the belt is there's for the taking!"

 

Angrily Drazon allows himself to be pulling from the apron, waiting until he hits the floor before lamping Maddix with a right hand. Landon retaliates in kind however, waiting for Drazon to do the same before wisely ducking. JD stops and turns on his heel quickly...

 

 

...as Maddix swings, and misses, with Sweet Disciple Music! Now Maddix doesn't know where he is, allowing Drazon to swing with the Thai Roundhouse...

 

 

...but MADDIX ducks, and quickly slides into the ring! JD reacts however and hops to the apron, grabbing Maddix by the hair before he can walk towards referee Anthony Michael Hall, who stands across the ring from this tussle.

 

Riley: "Oh NO! If only he was bald!"

 

Drazon nails a right...and a second, and then a third to rock Landon. Driving a shoulder into the gut to counter though, Maddix tries to turn again. However JD takes another handful of Maddix's golden locks and tugs him back, setting up the champion for a suplex! With a grunt, the challenger lifts the champion, but can't quite get Maddix all the way over. Gratefully he lands on his feet and tries to counter with a suplex of his own, but this time Drazon blocks. And as soon as he lands back on the apron, Drazon takes Maddix up into the air and over the ropes...

 

 

 

 

 

...SUPLEXING HIM TO THE FLOOR, BUT FALLING TO THE CONCRETE WITH HIM!!!!!!

 

 

 

Riley: "Oh my god!"

 

Comet: "Now both men are down. Incredible!"

 

"HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT!"

 

The crowd react rather more raucously than the announcers, breaking into shocked chants as both men lay flat out on the concrete floor. Anthony Michael Hall can't quite believe what he saw...so it's lucky for him that a series of replays roll to fill the time that both men remain motionless.

 

Comet: "This is a gutcheck now. Landon and Jay Dawg both have the championship gold, the belt, the money, the glory...waiting just a few feet away."

 

Riley: "There's one problem though...THEY JUST NEARLY KILLED EACH OTHER~!"

 

 

 

About a minute has passed already, and neither man has shown signs of movement. Some "Jay Dawg" chants are beginning to surface as suddenly the challenger's arm begins to move. A grimace comes to his face, but he guts it out and suddenly starts to sit up, to a roar from the fans!

 

Comet: "Jay Dawg is getting up!"

 

Albeit very slowly. But, JD IS getting up. Hearing the crowd routing for him, JD fights the pain and continues to drag himself up, as meanwhile Landon is beginning to stir too. A sudden haste begins to fill JD's mind and with all the energy he has, JD tries to speed up his crawl up. Landon meanwhile is conscious, just, and moving gingerly.

 

Riley: "The race is on...and, I can't think of any puns for that right now, so...yeah."

 

Comet: "Yeah?"

 

Riley: "Yes."

 

Comet: "Indeed."

 

Reaching out, JD places a hand on the apron and uses that to aid his climb back up...managing to prop himself on that apron and use that to get his legs to carry his body weight. Maddix meanwhile has rolled onto his front and is clawing towards the apron too somehow. But it's all in vain, as JD is now rolling into the ring, with Anthony Michael Hall in his sights. Quickly Drazon is in the ring, using the ropes to pull himself back up again as Maddix is just getting to the apron.

 

Comet: "Jay Dawg is UP! He's CLOSE! He's..."

 

...dazed, falling momentarily back into the ropes. Shaking out the pain, JD stumbles forward a step before gritting his teeth and beginning his short walk forward. But Landon is up...and seeing his title belt slipping from his grasp, he summons all the energy he can to enter the ring and dive forward for JD. JD is too far forward to tackle, but Maddix succeeds in pushing him forward...

 

 

 

 

...WIPING OUT MICHAEL HALL AND SENDING THE BELT FLYING!!!

 

"OOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!"

 

Comet: "Oh no! Hall is down...and what happens now?"

 

Riley: "Maddix grabs the belt!"

 

Indeed, the belt falls right by Maddix fingertips and gratefully he claims it. But with no referee to call for the bell, it doesn't matter. Wearily JD gets back up, cursing as he sees the referee laying at his feet and turning around...

 

 

...to take a title belt shot to the gut...

 

 

*SMACK!*

 

 

...and a VILE one to the head!

 

"BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!"

 

Riley: "YES! This match should be over. Maddix has the belt!"

 

Comet: "But there's no referee. Until Citizen Michael Hall makes the official call, this match is on-going."

 

Riley: "...they're just asking for a screw-job."

 

Comet: "Are you implying referee Michael Hall would turn on one of the competitors?"

 

Riley: "Hey, it's like they say, 'Everybody's Got a Price'."

 

Comet: "Are you implying referee Michael Hall would take a bribe?"

 

Riley: "...yes. Yes I am."

 

As Jay Dawg is back down, Maddix looks around wondering why the hell the pomp and circumstance hasn't begun to confirm his win. And then he remembers the referee. Hurriedly Landon bends down and starts to slap Michael Hall about to try and wake him up, and it seems it's working. Maddix keeps on slapping, more for enjoyment than anything, as Michael Hall finally turns around...

 

 

 

...just as Jay Dawg gets back to his feet!

 

Comet: "How in the..."

 

Riley: "Jamie Drazon is not HUMAN~!"

 

Comet: "Well, quite obviously he is."

 

Riley: "Then why doesn't he ACT like one!?!"

 

Suddenly JD spins Maddix around...

 

 

*SMACK!*

 

...and nailing the Thai Roundhouse! Spit goes flying, Maddix goes flying and the belt goes flying...the latter of which Jay Dawg retrieves and clutches to his chest...

 

 

 

 

...as Hall calls for the bell!!!

 

 

*DING DING DING!*

 

 

"YEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!"

 

Comet: "YES! NEW CHAMPION!"

 

Funyon scuttles over to Hall to check on the decision, as JD begins to celebrate with his new title, much to the delight of the crowd.

 

Funyon: "Here is your winner of the Boiler Room Brawl, and....

 

 

 

STILL!!!"

 

Comet: "WHAT!?!

 

Funyon: "...SWF ICTV CHAMPION... LAAAAAAANDDDOOOONN "LA CUCARACHA"... MAAAAADDIIIIXX!!!"

 

"BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!"

 

Riley: "YES! THERE'S NOT A NEW CHAMPION!"

 

Jay Dawg is in shock...much like everyone else in the Rosenblatt Stadium, most of which is now filled with some very heated boos. But referee Anthony Michael Hall is adamant over his decision, pulling himself up and taking the belt from Jay Dawg, before laying it over the champion Landon Maddix.

 

Riley: "This is magnificent! Justice has been done!"

 

Comet: "...Anthony Hall must have seen Maddix with the belt when Landon was trying to revive him..."

 

Riley: "Come on Comet. JUSTICE HAS BEEN DONE! You should be creaming yourself!"

 

Comet: "Tasteless and obnoxious in on sentence. Kudos."

 

Angrily Jay Dawg lets out a roar of frustration, and swipes at Hall who hits the deck once more! Not worried about any suspensions or fines, JD kicks Hall sharply in the ribs causing him to fall out of the ring...

 

 

...before turning to Maddix!

 

"YEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!"

 

Riley: "NO! Someone get security out here! This freak has SNAPPED!"

 

A muted cheer rings through the air now, as Maddix has reached his knees. Now though, JD grabs him by the hair and helps him the rest of the way up before setting him in position for Demolition Dreams! Another roar rings through the crowd as JD nods, picking Maddix up and DRIVING him to the canvas with Demolition Dreams, gaining a small measure of revenge in the process!

 

"YEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!"

 

 

Comet: "Demolition Dreams! And Bobby...I guess you could say that JUSTICE HAS BEEN SERVED!"

 

Riley: "Bastard."

 

Comet: "Landon Maddix is still the ICTV Champion though. But maybe we can cheer you up in just a few moments, after the break, as Johnny Dangerous has the chance to gain a victory over 'The Superior One' Tom Flesher. It's the main event...up next...so stay tuned!"

 

Riley: "...bastard..."

Edited June 29, 2004 by realitycheck

[the.weej 0]

“Good evening once again, fans,” says Bobby Riley. “We’re back in this urine-soaked hell-hole, and thank god we only have one match left tonight… your main event, Tom Flesher up against Johnny Dangerous!”

 

“Urine-soaked hell-hole? Robert, isn’t that a little harsh?” asks Cyclone Comet, saluting the fans. “This is one of the best baseball stadiums I’ve ever had the pleasure to be in. It even has a boiler room!”

 

“Be that as it may,” Riley says, “I still can’t shake the feeling it’s going to rain. God, I hope the weather holds off so Flesher can administer the slaughtering Johnny Dangerous deserves.”

 

“And with that in mind,” Comet says, “let’s go to Funyon!”

 

“Ladies and gentlemen,” says Funyon, “the following match is scheduled for one fall, and it is your main event!” The fans pop, and the flood lamps in the arena go out. “The first competitor…”

 

An explosion of blue pyro and smoke lights up the arena, and Led Zeppelin’s “Kashmir” begins to blare over the speakers! The smoke clears, and Tom Flesher walks out in his blue warm-up suit. Next to him is Allison Onita, dressed for spring in a blue button-down shirt and a matching knee-length skirt. She escorts him through the smoke and they walk forward together, fireworks going off in the background. As Allison escorts Flesher, the fans boo them both loudly. Flesher simply shoos them off with a flick of the wrist, and they enter the ring together. The pair strikes a pose, Flesher holding his chin and smirking, Onita curling up against hiom so close that it’s hard to tell where one stops and the other begins. Dace Night, meanwhile, looks on with disgust. The music fades, and Funyon begins his announcement.

 

“Accompanied by Allison Onita… from Buffalo, New York, and weighing in at 231 pounds, he is ‘the Superior One…’ the number-one contender to the SWF World Championship, TOM FLESHER!!!!!!!!!!!!”

 

Flesher starts a golf clap for himself, but the crowd responds by an even mix of booing and chanting of “JOHNNY! JOHNNY!” Looking annoyed, Flesher turns to Allison. She helps him out of his warmup suit and slides out of the ring. Flesher stretches out as the flood lamps go out once again.

 

“Johnny Dangerous!”

 

A sultry female voice breathes the name of the SWF’s resident super-spy. “After The Flesh” by My Life With The Thrill Kill Cult begins to thump over the speakers, and the crowd begins to cheer. Smoke fills the stage as tons of strobes cut through it and Johnny Dangerous walks out through the velvet curtain onto center stage.

 

“There,” says Cyclone Comet, “you see true dedication to a teammate and to a better time in his career.”

 

The camera pans Johnny Dangerous from the tips of his toes to the top of his head. His black wrestling boots and black kneepads are not unusual, but rather than his standard Matrix-esque outfit, he wears his singlet, from the Wild and Dangerous era. Some fans burst into an impromptu chant of “DUB CEE! DUB CEE!” as Johnny makes his way to the ring. Ordinarily, Johnny would play to the fans as he walked toward the ring, but not tonight. Tonight is different. Tonight, he takes out The Man.

 

“Look at the determination on Agent Dangerous’s face,” says Comet. “He’s focused on one thing an one thing only – cementing himself as a true number-one!”

 

Johnny slides into the ring, but before he can get in, Flesher lunges at him and slams into his head with a dropkick! Johnny collapses to the mat, and Flesher gets up, grabbing him by the head! “After The Flesh” abruptly fades out, and Sexton Hardcastle calls for the bell.

 

 

DING DING DING!!!!

 

 

“This one’s underway,” says Riley, “but not because of anything Johnny Dangerous did! Flesher gets the jump on him to start the match off.”

 

Tom leads Johnny by the head into the corner, slamming him face-first into the turnbuckle. He shoves Johnny backwards and unloads a chop across his chest!

 

*SMACK!!!!* (WHOO!)

 

Johnny’s body shakes as Flesher nails him with the chop, then follows up with another!

 

*SMACK!!!!* (WHOO!)

 

Flesher prepares for another chop, but Johnny weakly holds up an arm to block it. Sneering, Tom stuns Johnny with a quick backhand, shoving him back into the corner, then chops him again!

 

*SMACK!!!!* (WHOO!)

 

*SMACK!!!!* (WHOO!)

 

*SMACK!!!!* (WHOO!)

 

“And there you have it,” chuckles Riley. “Johnny Dangerous attempts to defend against Tom Flesher… for some reason, I’m not quite clear on why, he thought he could stop the onslaught, but Flesher puts him right back in his place.”

 

Tom grabs Dangerous’ wrist and pivots, whipping him across the ring into the diagonal corner. Flesher follows behind him, and as Johnny hits the buckles, Tom leaps off his feet and slams into him with an avalanche! Flesher bounces back, and Johnny collapses to the mat. Tom grabs him and rolls him to his back, then kneels on him as Hardcastle counts

 

ONE!

 

No more, though, as Johnny thrusts a shoulder off the mat and sits up. Flesher shakes his head disgustedly and slaps on a chinlock.

 

“Citizen Flesher is, frankly, being a big baby about this,” says Comet. “I understand that he’s upset about not getting a one-on-one match with Janus, but trying to take it out on Johnny Dangerous is just childish. I simply cannot understand why he feels the need to pout about this.”

 

“Come on,” says Riley, as Flesher cranks the chinlock. He sits up, planting a knee into Johnny’s back, and cinches the hold tight. “Flesher’s got every right in the world to be angry. He’s being denied his fair shot at the World Title against that big buffoon, and look at who he’s got to face now! I mean, either one of them would have been bad, but…”

 

Flesher scowls at Dangerous, who slowly begins to scoot to the side. Johnny gets to one knee and thrusts an elbow into Flesher’s stomach! Flesher tries to keep the chinlock on, but Dangerous slams another elbow into Tom’s gut! Finally, Flesher shifts positions, and as Johnny gets to his feet, Flesher slaps on a side headlock. Immediately, the fans begin to boo.

 

“And here we are,” says Comet, sounding quite disgusted. “Flesher doesn’t get what he wants, and so instead of fighting Johnny, he’s just going to lean on him and bore the crowd to death.”

 

“That’s just not true!” protests Riley. “Flesher’s perfectly happy to fight Johnny Dangerous, as long as Johnny’s able to, you know, stand up for himself. Otherwise why expend the energy? It’s not like there’s any reason to take Mr. Secret Agent Man seriously anyway. Everything good he’s ever done was mostly Wildchild’s doing. Hell, he’s getting up for the big match and what does he do? Wear that damn singlet. He’s got no identity of his own.”

 

A few beats later, though, Flesher snaps to the side and pulls Johnny across his hip with a side headlock takeover! He holds Johnny on his back, and Hardcastle counts

 

ONE!

 

Once again, though, Johnny quickly gets a shoulder up and quickly rolls back to his stomach. Flesher keeps the headlock and spins back, ending up on top. Scowling, Flesher throws an elbow into the back of Johnny’s head, stunning the Secret Agent. The Superior One grabs Johnny under the hips, then stands up, listing his opponent off the mat like a rag doll! Then, with an arch of his back, he slams Dangerous back-first to the mat with a German suplex! Johnny hits on his shoulders and Flesher releases his grip, letting him roll backwards onto his stomach in a heap.

 

“Look at that!” marvels Bobby Riley. “Even as angry as he is, Tom Flesher is able to make those smooth transitions that keep him in control, and then slam the crap out of his opponent. I’ve always wondered what it would be like to wrestle him… you lock up, and then before you know it, BAM! It’s over.”

 

“I’m sure that’s more or less how it would be for you, yes,” agrees Comet.

 

Johnny starts to sit up, but as he does, Flesher unloads a stiff kick to his face! The Dangerous One flops backwards, and Flesher plants a boot on his neck. As Dangerous convulses on the mat, Flesher reaches over and grabs the top rope, leaning even harder into the boot choke! Hardcastle sprints over and yells at Flesher to break the hold, but Tom ignores him entirely. He just forces more weight onto the choking Dangerous’s windpipe, and Hardcastle begins his count!

 

ONE!

 

TWO!

 

THREE!

 

FOUR!

 

Finally, Flesher steps off, leaving Johnny to turn from blue back to a more normal shade as Hardcastle admonishes him. Flesher rolls his eyes, then shoves past the referee to grab Dangerous again. He lifts Johnny to his feet and hooks him around the waist, then runs full-speed into the corner! As his shoulder slams into Johnny’s gut, the Secret Agent cries out in pain. Flesher backs away, allowing Johnny to relax for a second… but then hammers him with a high-powered double leg! He drives into Johnny’s stomach, then backs out. Johnny slumps forward, and Flesher casually rolls him to his stomach. Scowling, he looks to Hardcastle for the count.

 

ONE!!

 

 

TWO!!!

 

 

 

NO! Dangerous kicks out! Flesher, pissed off at Dangerous kicking out, grabs him by the wrist. He stands up and pulls Johnny into an Irish whip, then yanks him into a knee to the gut! Johnny doubles over in pain as Flesher pulls him back up to a vertical base, then whacks him in the jaw with a palm strike! Johnny staggers backwards, and Flesher assists him back to the mat with a stiff kick to the stomach. Johnny falls to the mat, where he’s an easy target for Flesher to drop a knee onto his left shoulder. He stays on the shoulder and plants the bone of his forearm across the bridge of the Dangerous One’s nose, then grinds it to the side as he makes yet another cover.

 

ONE!!

 

 

TWO!!!!

 

 

 

NO!!!!!!

 

 

“Try as he might,” says Cyclone Comet, “Tom Flesher simply cannot keep Johnny Dangerous down!”

 

“Sure, you can say that all you want,” says Riley, “but it’s only a few minutes into the match! Really, aside from some of the rookies, who gets taken apart in two minutes? If you’re just a brawler, maybe, but Tom Flesher likes to use a bit more finesse. He’s going to deconstruct Johnny Dangerous, bit by bit, until he feels good and ready to lock him up and make him tap.”

 

With Johnny on the mat, Flesher smirkingly hooks his leg and steps over, applying a half crab and stepping back to increase the angle. Johnny grimaces in pain as Flesher holds his left leg, forcing it back far beyond the natural range of motion. Flesher leans back, looking quite satisfied as Johnny grunts in pain. He lifts the leg up, taking the crab hold to a higher angle and then stepping back. He plants one foot on Dangerous’s head, pulling him into a nearly perfect arc! The fans boo loudly as Flesher stretches Dangerous, but Allison simply cheers him on.

 

“Hoo boy,” says Riley. “Flesher’s just pulling out all the stops tonight! The boot choke, the half crab, even standing on Johnny’s head! I wonder how long it’s going to be before Johnny does the honorable thing and taps.”

 

Flesher continues straining Johnny’s body, stretching him out as he keeps his Doc Marten boot planted on the back of the Secret Agent’s head. Johnny struggles, trying to get free or at least get to the ropes, but Flesher keeps the hold on. With a half-sadistic smile on his face, Tom cranks the crab back again.

 

“And man, is Tom enjoying himself,” says Riley. “He’s blowing off steam like nobody’s business. I’m telling you, there’s no one better that Alex Zenon could have fed to Tom Flesher than Johnny Dangerous. He’s just good enough as a tuneup, just resilient enough for Flesher to take out his aggression on, and just stupid enough to come back for more.”

 

Flesher finally decides he’s had enough time to rest and releases the leg. He takes a step back, allowing Johnny to breathe for a few seconds and crawl toward the ropes. As soon as he gets there, though, Flesher charges at him and hammers him with a dropkick to the knee! Dangerous collapses to the mat, and Flesher grabs his head. He yanks his opponent into a front facelock and backs toward the center of the ring. Johnny tries to resist, but Flesher urges him along with a stiff elbow to the back of the head. Johnny slumps forward, giving Flesher just enough time to duck down and lift him off the mat for a vertical suplex! He holds his opponent upside down for a few seconds, stalling…

 

As the blood rushes to Johnny Dangerous’s head…

 

“Look at the look on Tom Flesher’s face,” says Cyclone Comet. “He’s not just enjoying himself tonight. He’s happy to be taking his vengeance on Johnny Dangerous. It’s not right, Robert – all he’s trying to do is hurt him!”

 

“Oh, come on! This sport isn’t for the pantywaists, Comet!”

 

“Touché,” concedes the Caped Crusader. “Your career was unusually short.”

 

Finally, with Johnny Dangerous completely disoriented from being held upside down for so long, Flesher falls to the mat! In the blink of an eye, he takes Johnny Dangerous skydiving from five feet, ten inches in the air to a crash landing on the mat headfirst! The noise echoes through the arena, and Dangerous actually bounces off the mat and toward the sidelines before landing with another crash! As Johnny collapses in a mound on the canvas, Flesher rolls over nonchalantly. He leans across Dangerous’s body, savoring the moment of just having compressed the Secret Agent’s spine. Sexton Hardcastle drops down to make the three-count.

 

“Well, this is academic,” says Riley.

 

ONE!!!

 

 

TWO!!!!!!!

 

 

 

THR- NO!!!!!!!!! Hardcastle points to the ropes, where Johnny Dangerous’s leg is draped! The crowd bursts into cheers as Flesher sits up, screaming for Hardcastle to ring the bell! The referee, unskilled as he might be, refuses to change the call, and Flesher is irate! He kicks Johnny’s leg off the ropes and rolls him to his stomach, then grabs him by the singlet straps. With a quick heave, Flesher tosses Dangerous over the top rope, sending him crumbling to the concrete.

 

“Tom Flesher is having some anger management issues,” says Comet, as Flesher backs away from the ropes. Hardcastle begins reprimanding Flesher, and Comet continues, “This is a man who’s simply unable to control himself when faced with normal difficulties in the course of the profession. I don’t understand why Alex Zenon is letting him anywhere near the World Title.”

 

Flesher holds his hands up, professing his own innocence. Allison Onita, meanwhile, sneaks around the ring, behind Hardcastle’s back.

 

“Well, would you be happy?” asks Riley. “Things aren’t going Tom Flesher’s way, but it’s not because of ‘normal difficulties’ or ‘standard operating procedures.’ Alex Zenon’s out to screw him, and Sexton Hardcastle’s bias is becoming more and more evident with every passing moment.”

 

As Flesher continues claiming innocence, Allison waits for Johnny to get up. As he does, she steps toward him and levels him with a Drop Kiss! Johnny collapses back to the concrete, but Allison helpfully rolls him back into the ring. The fans chide her with a “YOU SUCK COCK!” chant, but she just flips them off and struts away happily.

 

“Oh, come on!” shouts Comet, as the arena echoes with boos. “With all the unfair advantages he has, I’m surprised everything’s going so badly!”

 

“Unfair advantages? Comet, what are you talking about?”

 

“Are you telling me you didn’t see that?! Allison Onita just leveled Johnny Dangerous!”

 

“Sorry, Comet,” says Riley with a shrug. “My monitor went out, so I missed it. I’m absolutely sure, though, that a sweet girl like Allie wouldn’t do something like that.”

 

“WE’RE WATCHING THE SAME MONITOR!”

 

Flesher shrugs and shoves past Hardcastle, no longer needing to distract the easily-befuddled ref. He looks at Johnny and grins, deciding not to put Johnny away quite yet. Instead, he grabs Johnny and pulls him to his feet, grapevining a leg from behind. He twists Johnny to the side and hooks his right arm over Johnny’s left, leaning back with a technically perfect abdominal stretch. The fans almost instantaneously kick into a chant of “BOOOOOORING! BOOOOORING!” Flesher sits back with a smile, then decides to turn the match into a demonstration of technique. He releases his grapevine and shuffles to the side, then executes a smooth shuck of his arm to bend Johnny over. He swings his arm over, moving from his sterling abdominal stretch into a shining example of a side headlock!

 

“BOOOOORING! BOOOOORING!”

 

“And here’s Flesher,” yawns Comet, “as always, going back to those lazy moves so he can get a break while simultaneously infuriating the fans. You’d think at some point he’d be a little more considerate of the crowd.”

 

“Why would he? It’s not like they’ve ever done anything for him.”

 

“You mean besides paying for his hotel rooms and that BMW he drives across the country?”

 

“Surely he’s paid them all back by putting on technical clinics for the fans like he’s done all night.”

 

Flesher holds the headlock, wrenching Johnny’s neck and wearing a self-satisfied smirk. Johnny grimaces, struggling to escape. He wraps one arm around Flesher’s waist, then reaches up with the other and grabs Tom’s wrist. Flesher plants his feet, feeling Johnny trying to work his way out of the hold, and solidifies his grip. Johnny, though, jerks forward, shoving Flesher a step off-balance. As the Superior One tries to compensate and regain his footing, Dangerous sweeps the arm down and swings it behind Tom’s back! He stands up, slapping Flesher into a hammerlock! Tom Flesher’s eyes widen as he stands, caught completely off-guard by Johnny’s smooth counter to the headlock!

 

“Johnny Dangerous executes a picture-perfect hammerlock counter to the side headlock!” beams Comet, as Johnny quickly steps back. He yanks on the arm and pulls Flesher into an Irish whip, sending him to the ropes. As the still-surprised Flesher rebounds, Johnny pivots and nails him with a spinning heel kick that sends the Superior One to the mat! Shocked, Flesher rolls out under the bottom rope, hitting the concrete floor to try and collect his thoughts, and the fans burst into cheers! Johnny sprints from the center toward Flesher and begins to vault over the top rope, but instead catches the top cable and stops himself. He holds up one finger and waggles it at Flesher, as if to say, “You’re not going to catch me like that.” That prompts a cheer from the fans, and Flesher simply walks over to his corner to talk to Allison. Sexton Hardcastle begins his count.

 

ONE!

 

“Citizen Flesher performs his usual disappearing act at the slightest hint of danger,” says Comet disapprovingly. “Although he tried to goad Johnny Dangerous into attempting a high-risk maneuver, Dangerous is showing that he’s more grounded than he has been in the past. Not only did he manage to wrestle his way out of Tom Flesher’s side headlock, but he caught himself before he gave Flesher a chance to suplex him on the outside.”

 

TWO!

 

Flesher walks over to Allison, who pulls a small hand towel out of her handbag and begins blotting Tom’s forehead. She whispers advice to him as he tries to recover from the surprise of Johnny taking the lead.

 

THREE!

 

“Tom’s just taking a break,” says Bobby. “He was getting some rest and collecting his thoughts in that headlock, and that damn Johnny violated the gentleman’s agreement among competitors not to interfere with those sorts of moves. Frankly, I’m disappointed in Johnny, and I’m surprised Hardcastle hasn’t DQ’d him for that.”

 

FOUR!

 

Flesher shakes his head, seeming to be ready to fight again. He moves to the apron, but waves Johnny away from where he’s going to slide in.

 

“This is ludicrous!” says Comet.

 

“Why?” Riley says incredulously. “All he’s trying to do is avoid a shameless attack before he’s ready to defend himself! What’s wrong with that?”

 

“Well, for one, he’s holding Agent Dangerous to a higher standard than he’s willing to hold himself.”

 

“Oh, now you’re just making things up.”

 

FIVE!

 

Hardcastle shoos Johnny away, giving Flesher a wide safe zone to slide into the ring. Flesher does so cautiously, eyeing Dangerous with a look of distrust. He gets to his knees and leers at Johnny, holding up his hands in order to maintain his veneer of innocence and vulnerability. He stands up slowly, and Sexton Hardcastle backs away. As soon as he does, Flesher steps forward, throwing a palm strike… but he gets stopped in his tracks! Johnny sends Flesher staggering back with an expertly-placed dropkick to Flesher’s chest! Tom backs into the ropes, and Johnny quickly rolls to his feet. He springs toward Flesher, grabbing his wrist and whipping him across the ring and into the ropes. Flesher bounces off the ropes, and Johnny steps into him. He snags Flesher by the arm and rotates him over, sending him to the mat with a hiptoss! Flesher bounces off the mat and rolls to the corner, trying to collect his thoughts. As he sits against the buckles, Johnny charges into the corner and dropkicks Flesher in the face! He slumps back in the corner, and Johnny backs up to the center. The crowd begins to cheer, and Dangerous sprints forward, then somersaults and nails Flesher with a koppo kick! The crowd explodes!

 

“KOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOPPO KICK by Johnny Dangerous!” shouts Comet. “And here comes the cover!”

 

Sure enough, Johnny Dangerous rolls Flesher to his back and covers him for

 

ONE!!!

 

 

TWO!!!!!

 

 

 

NO!!!!! Flesher kicks out! Dangerous looks up and sees the crowd cheering for him, and smiles slightly. Flesher, still stunned, stays on the mat, and Johnny quickly runs over to the turnbuckle. Quickly, he scales the ropes as Flesher gets to his feet. Flesher turns away, and Johnny launches himself off the top turnbuckle! He hammers Flesher with a missile dropkick to the back of the head, and the Superior One collapses! Johnny dives onto him for

 

ONE!!!

 

 

TWO!!!!!

 

 

 

THR- NO! SHOULDER UP! Flesher rolls away, but Dangerous is fired up! With Flesher on the run, he sprints toward the former World Champion and grabs him in a front facelock. Flesher, in an uncharacteristic role reversal, tries desperately to back out of the facelock, but Johnny silences him by falling forward and nailing him in the back of the head with a fistdrop! Flesher nearly flattens out, but Johnny hooks the facelock even tighter. He ducks his head down and arches backwards, hitting Flesher with a vertical suplex! He crowd cheers, but Johnny doesn’t float over for the pin. Instead, he keeps his front facelock and rolls to the side, then stands up. Once again, he lifts Flesher up and falls back, nailing a second suplex! With the crowd cheering, Johnny rolls through once again, lifting Flesher one final time. Instead of falling back this time, though, Johnny holds Flesher upside down! The stalling draws a huge round of applause from the fans, and even though Johnny can’t stall quite as long as Flesher, the fans applaud nonetheless when he drops to the mat and slams Flesher to his back. The fans continue cheering as Johnny covers him for

 

ONE!!!

 

 

TWO!!!!!!

 

 

 

THRE- NO!!!!!!!!

 

 

The crowd groans disappointedly as Flesher shoots his shoulder off the mat, despite obviously being shaken.

 

“Johnny Dangerous turns the tables on Tom Flesher,” says Cyclone Comet as Johnny gets to his feet. The Secret Agent looks disappointed, but is ready to continue fighting for the win. “He seemed to be almost taunting Flesher in response to that stalling brainbuster from the early parts of the match, but like Flesher, he was unable to secure the fall.”

 

“Oh, get over it,” scoffs Riley. “Johnny’s got some decent offense in, but he’s lucky any of it connected. Why, back in my day we didn’t act like a match was won after the first significant offensive spree, but it’s not like you know a thing about offense.”

 

“Believe me, Robert, sitting next to you has taught me more about offense than I’d ever care to know.”

 

Flesher stands up, with Johnny standing only inches behind. Flesher stabilizes himself on the ropes, but Johnny quickly drives in and grabs him by one arm! As the crowd begins to scream its approval, Dangerous lifts Flesher up, setting up the MI Slam! The crowd cheers… only to be disappointed when Flesher slides his hips back and wriggles down Johnny’s back to land on his feet. Their disappointed moans turn to booing as Flesher drops to his knees and shoots an arm upward, nailing Johnny Dangerous in the crotch before rolling away.

 

“That is grounds for an immediate disqualification!” fumes Comet. “I can’t believe that Sexton Hardcastle is allowing this to go on!”

 

“Don’t start,” groans Riley. “No one’s been disqualified for a perfectly legal Greco-Roman depression of the vas deferens since Caesar was in charge. Let it go. You’ll be much happier once you stop shamelessly favoring one man in this match.”

 

As Johnny starts to get up, Flesher dives at him, hammering him in the left shoulder with a dropkick! As the fans boo, Flesher grabs Dangerous from behind and lifts him up, shoving him sternum-first into the corner! Then, with a sneer, Flesher grabs Johnny’s left arm and twists it up against his back, applying the same hammerlock that the Secret Agent used to escape Flesher’s clutches earlier! Sardonically, Flesher shows off the hammerlock to the fans as he drives his shoulder into Johnny’s back The Dangerous One tries to escape but Flesher simply drives him into the corner once again. Tom adjusts his position, and then wraps an arm around Johnny’s waist. With a quick arch of his back and a pop of his hips, Flesher takes Johnny to the mat with a hammerlock backdrop suplex! Johnny lands on his cocked arm and cries out, showing the pain that Flesher is administering. The Superior One holds the waistlock and rolls through, staying on top of Dangerous.

 

“Tom Flesher seems obsessed with getting Johnny Dangerous back,” says Cyclone. “After Johnny managed to outsmart him and then taunt him with those rolling suplexes with a stall tacked on at the end, Flesher’s been even angrier than he was when he started the match!”

 

“Wouldn’t you be? Johnny not only makes a mockery of this sport, he’s calling into question Flesher’s absolute right to a shot at the World Title! Why should Tom have to deal with his kind of crap? It’s unfair, I tell you!”

 

Flesher backs away, letting Johnny fight his way up to his feet. Flesher then spins out, extending Johnny’s arm to the side. Johnny fights in, trying to get in position to fight for a quick martial arts throw. Flesher, though, smirks that he’s taken the bait and bends the arm back into a chicken wing. From the chest to chest lock, Flesher hooks Dangerous by the thigh and scoops him off the mat. He holds him a few feet off the mat, then slams the Secret Agent shoulder-first to the mat! Dangerous’s face shows the agony he’s in as he lands with all his weight on the point of his shoulder, but Flesher cruelly walks across him before dropping onto him for a cover.

 

ONE!!!

 

 

TWO!!!!!!

 

 

 

THRE- NO!!!!!! Johnny shoots his uninjured right shoulder off the mat, and the fans bust into cheers! Flesher’s brow knots up into a glare, and he lifts Dangerous to his feet with a jerk of the left arm. He whips Johnny to the corner, then leaves him there as he measures up for a running double leg in the corner! He sprints toward Johnny, driving his shoulder toward him… but Dangerous somersaults over him! Comet screams, “Shades of the Wildchild!” as Johnny rolls to his feet behind Flesher! Tom slams into the corner full-force and lands in a pile in the corner. Johnny grabs him and pulls him back to the center, nailing him with a stiff kick to the ribs. With Flesher stunned, the Dangerous One hooks his leg and looks for a half crab!

 

“Here it comes,” shills Comet. “Not only is Dangerous once again getting the upper hand in Flesher’s game of anything you can do, I can do better, but he’s going to take him to school with the Barracuda!”

 

Sure enough, Johnny begins to turn Flesher over for the stretch muffler variant! Flesher fights, scooting to the sidelines as fast as he can. Johnny tries to keep him in the center of the ring, and manages to turn him over into a half crab hold a few feet from the ropes. As he drops to one knee and tries to thread the beefy Flesher’s muscular leg over his shoulder, though, the Superior One crawls a few more inches toward the ropes! The fans chant “JOHNNY! JOHNNY!,” trying to encourage him, but finally, Flesher grabs the bottom rope! Johnny sits down anyway, though, and hooks the Barracuda in anyway! Sexton Hardcastle steps in to make his count, but the fans drown him out with their cheers and chants for Dangerous!

 

ONE!

 

TWO!

 

THREE!

 

FOUR!

 

Finally, just before the disqualifying five-count, Dangerous breaks the hold! He pumps his fists, the adrenaline flowing through his body as Flesher tries frantically to collect himself.

 

“Johnny Dangerous is in control!” shouts Cyclone Comet. “It’s only a matter of time!”

 

Flesher slowly begins to get to his feet, but Johnny steps toward him. He shoves Flesher backwards, then nails him in the chest with a stiff chop!

 

*SMACK!!!!* (WHOO!)

 

Flesher staggers backwards into the turnbuckles, and Johnny continues the assault!

 

*SMACK!!!!* (WHOO!)

 

*SMACK!!!!* (WHOO!)

 

*SMACK!!!!* (WHOO!)

 

*SMACK!!!!* (WHOO!)

 

*SMACK!!!!* (WHOO!)

 

Finally, Johnny backs away and springs at Flesher, nailing him with a quick and dirty avalanche! The fans cheer as Johnny emulates Flesher’s early-match offense, sending Flesher stumbling out of the corner! The Superior One steps forward, then staggers forward again, finally flopping impotently to the mat face-first! The fans burst into cheers… but as Johnny stands up and begins golf-clapping, they go absolutely apeshit! Dangerous grabs Flesher by the hands and drags him to the center of the mat, then points to the corner!

 

“And here it comes!” shouts Cyclone Comet as Johnny Dangerous scales the turnbuckles once again. “He couldn’t hit the MI Slam! His Barracuda crab hold came too late! But now, after he nails Flesher with Death From Above, Johnny Dangerous is going to register possibly the most important win of his career!”

 

Dangerous stands on the top rope, with Flesher motionless in the center. As Johnny prepares for the moonsault double stomp, he looks to the sky. He pounds his chest twice, prompting another round of “DUB CEE!” chants and a huge cheer. Finally, he leaps off the top rope! He arches back, and dives feet-first toward the mat… only to hit the canvas! The crowd boos as Flesher rolls out of the way at the last second, and Johnny crashes to the mat! He hits feet first, but without Flesher to absorb the shock, Johnny staggers and can’t keep his balance. Flesher, breathing hard, stands up and grabs Johnny from behind before he can regain his footing. The Superior One lifts Johnny Dangerous off the mat and hoists him into the air. Instead of bridging straight back, though, Flesher cocks himself slightly to the left. He arches back and breaks his grip at the zenith of the throw, dumping Dangerous with a released German suplex! Johnny crashes to the mat, with all his weight coming down on the left shoulder blade! Flesher hears Johnny cry out as he hits the mat, and as he rolls to his stomach, the same sadistic smirk he wore early in the match crosses his face once again.

 

“Dance with the girl you brought,” says Bobby Riley, as Flesher swaggers to the ropes. With Johnny laying in a heap on the mat, Riley says, “Flesher’s elaborate cat-and-mouse game came all the way back around, and now he’s taking Johnny out with the simple tactics he’s been using since he debuted in the SJL. It may not be pretty, but it’s what’s taken him from jerking the curtain in the JL to being a two-time World Champion.”

 

Flesher struts across the ring, picking up speed. As he approaches Johnny, he jumps into the air, then comes crashing down onto his chest with a double stomp! The crowd boos, Allison cheers, and Flesher drops to one knee on top of Dangerous. With the wind knocked out of him, Dangerous is limp as Flesher lifts him off the mat. He gutwrenches Johnny off the mat, then turns him upside down and quickly spikes him onto the back of his neck! The crowd screams its boos, chanting “FLESHER SUCKS! FLESHER SUCKS!”

 

“EGO BUSTER!” beams Riley. “He hit the German. He hit the double stomp that Johnny Dangerous was too concerned with impressing the fans to be able to hit… and now, with the Ego Buster, it’s all academic! Anything Dangerous can do, Tom can do better… but tonight, it was about winning, and winning convincingly. Flesher did that. Flesher is, bar none, The Man.”

 

“We’ll see whether that’s true or not when he faces off in that three-way match with the Champion and his co-number-one contender,” scowls Comet. “In the mean time, don’t give Flesher any credit where none is due.

 

The Superior One, though, isn’t concerned with Riley’s gushing praise or Comet’s reasoned put-downs. All he wants is the pin. He cradles Johnny’s leg, and Hardcastle counts…

 

ONE!!!

 

 

TWO!!!!!!

 

 

 

THREE!!!!!!!!!

 

 

DING DING DING!!!!

 

 

“Your winner,” says Funyon, “the SUPERIOR ONE, TOM FLESHER!”

 

Flesher stands up, and Sexton Hardcastle raises his arm. Allison Onita springs into the ring next to him and raises his free hand as “Kashmir” begins to blare.

 

“Ladies and gentlemen, there’s the next SWF World Champion,” says Riley. “No matter who’s going to stand in his way, Tom Flesher can cut them down and win his third World Championship. Tonight, he played with Johnny Dangerous like a toy, and then put him out of his misery at will. How can ANYONE – Danny, Dace, Toxxic, or Janus – compete with that?”

 

Flesher looks down at Johnny with disdain. “Kashmir” echoes through the arena, and Flesher revels in his victory. Allison, meanwhile, frames her hands over Flesher’s stomach, tracing the shape of the big gold belt.

 

“Tom Flesher is back in town,” Riley shills, “and I think Johnny will be happy to tell you that tomorrow while he’s in traction.”

 

As Flesher celebrates his win, Johnny Dangerous lays on the mat. One man is triumphant.

 

The other is merely a victim.

 

===

SWF Smarkdown, June 28, 2004.

© Noble Gas Productions. All rights reserved.

“The Smarks Wrestling Federation: Raising workrate by typing faster.”

[the.weej 0]

Fucking board at my closing post. RAR!

 

Anyway, IMHO, a much better show than the last one on both the surface and in the 'backstage.' The DNS is a blemish, but not a particularly big one. Make sure to check everything out, as there's a few interesting results lying around.

 

Card will be up when I get it up. I tried to work on it this afternoon, and I was dead on ideas...

 

-Z