Keep On Rocking In The Free World (Take 2)

[Guest Catcher8C]

i know a lot of you dont know who in the hell i am and you have never seen me post but i think i want to ask for ur opinion on something. i play in a band called hard country, and our thing is either updating the sound or lyrics to outlaw country/classic rock songs.

 

last night i started looking at the lyrics for this neil young song, and it got me thinking. in the line "she put her kid away, shes gone to get a hit," i started thinking about the kid. where is he now? if he were alive today, what would his life be like? so, basically i attempted to update or i guess rewrite "keep on rockin in the free world" from a teenage guy's perspective, as a sequel almost. this kid has always been ambitious and intellectual, but it hasn't gotten him anywhere. he lives in a world that is still corrupt (surprise) and still full of anger and bad decisions. the only real weird twist i put in is pretty obvious. imagine someone living in south carolina.

 

the original lyrics are in italics:

 

Colors on the street,

Red white and blue,

People shuffling their feet,

People sleeping in their shoes,

 

There's a warning sign on the road ahead,

There's a lot of people saying we'd be better off dead,

Don't feel like satan, But I am to them,

So I try to forget it anyway I can,

 

CHORUS

Keep on Rocking in The Free World

X4

 

I see a girl in the night,

With a baby in her hand,

Under an old street light,

Near a garbage can,

 

Now she puts the kid away and she's gone to get a hit,

She hates her life and what she's done to it,

There's one more kid that will never go to school,

Never get to fall in love never get to be cool,

 

CHORUS

 

We got a thousand points of light,

For the homeless man,

We got a kinder gentler machine gun hand,

 

We got department stores and toilet paper,

Styrophone boxes for the ozone layer,

Got a man of th epeople says keep hope alive,

Got fuel to burn got roads to drive,

 

CHORUS

 

The marching band is playing,

For the football team,

Don't know what they're saying,

Forgot how to dream,

 

We've got broken spirits and steroid users,

One more shooting and we'll have a couple fewer,

But the coach is standing up says keep hope alive,

Focus on state forget about who died,

 

CHORUS

 

The South will rise again,

The rest will be shot down,

Get the hint if you're black you need to leave this town,

 

We have not forgotten the spicks (sp?) and the japs,

Gotta watch them arabs make sure they don't attack,

That's what being a patriot is all about,

Find who you don't like and kick them out,

 

CHORUS/SOLO

 

Because they're stealing our jobs,

While we argue at home,

Divorce rate climbing,

Leave the gays alone,

 

I don't like what I see when I look out the door,

But mom and dad are fighting I can hear it through the floor,

I guess I need to become a football star,

Maybe then they'll like me maybe then I'll go far,

 

CHORUS

 

Mom you ruined my life,

I know you know you did,

You've got a lot to regret,

But all you do is pretend,

 

You know you need to change you know you need a lift,

Be careful what you ask for you just might get,

I am tired of waiting I am rolling up my sleeves,

I can't count on you no more, I've got to count on me,

 

CHORUS

 

Last night my mom took her very last hit,

I'm 16 years old and all she could do was quit,

There's one more family that'll never be saved,

Never get to start over never get a chance to pray,

 

CHORUS

 

*Soft Mournful Part*

 

20 years from now if I open up this cloest,

Will the gun still be there or have I finally lost it,

I guess I need to make up my mind,

The pin has hit the shell so it's better luck next time,

 

*Rock out conclusion*

 

CHORUS

x8

Solo

End

 

I know it's kind of shaky in a lot of places but this is only the third or fourth song we've tried to write together. We had our first performance at a cancer benefit a few months ago and we're just trying to pull it together I guess. Before you bash away tho, It would be cool if you could help me fix some of the word choices and what not.

 

Thanks

 

Chris

[B. Brian Brunzell 0]

Angry. So very angry. The lyrics aren't all that bad though.

[Guest Catcher8C]

Angry. So very angry. The lyrics aren't all that bad though.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

 

 

thanks bud i appreciate it

[Sonic Reducer 0]

I'd say if you want to stick to the point of view of an intellectual kid, you'd probably want to get rid of the anti-black and anti- ... I guess I'll say 'non-american' themes. And the whole 'South will rise again'.

 

That kind of sticks out like a sore thumb. But maybe thats what you're going for.

[Guest Catcher8C]

I'd say if you want to stick to the point of view of an intellectual kid, you'd probably want to get rid of the anti-black and anti- ... I guess I'll say 'non-american' themes. And the whole 'South will rise again'.

 

That kind of sticks out like a sore thumb. But maybe thats what you're going for.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

 

 

well i guess the best explanation is that its misguided sarcasm. i mean if i was going to write the whole song third person that would work fine but i guess in the first person i cant really see the kid saying that.

[Sonic Reducer 0]

I'd say if you want to stick to the point of view of an intellectual kid, you'd probably want to get rid of the anti-black and anti- ... I guess I'll say 'non-american' themes. And the whole 'South will rise again'.

 

That kind of sticks out like a sore thumb. But maybe thats what you're going for.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

 

 

well i guess the best explanation is that its misguided sarcasm. i mean if i was going to write the whole song third person that would work fine but i guess in the first person i cant really see the kid saying that.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

 

I figured it was somewhat sarcastic. But either way.

 

I dunno. I never saw the point in rewriting lyrics for another artists song.

 

Not to bash you or anything.

[The Czech Republic 0]

I figured the kid in the original song died. Also, you momentarily lapsed into what was ostensibly a rewrite of "Southern Man," and then something Toby Keith would do, and also, I can't imagine this song would have a soft, mournful section. But keep on rockin' with your rewrites all the same.

 

 

Oh also, insofar as I can judge by singing your lyrics as I listen to the original, the lyrics don't always flow smoothly. The "mom you ruined my life" verse sticks out to me, because it doesn't follow the AABB rhyme scheme that Neil used and you picked up. Are you doing something different there musically? I can't tell. At any rate, if you're gonna cover this song, I really think you should leave the lyrics as they are. It bothers me when covers mess with the original lyrics. I think Limp Bizkit did this with "Wish You Were Here." Feel free to, as you said, provide a different way of arranging the music, add some instruments, do some other stuff like that. But I think the lyrics are kind of sacrosanct, especially with Neil Young.