Justice 0 Report post Posted December 1, 2005 ** The following takes place about 1 hour before SWF Lockdown starts ** The last few workers have arrived at the arena when a beat up pick up truck pulls up outside the “athlete’s entrance” in the back. The truck immediately draws the attention of referee Nick Soapdish who has one of the other referees run and fetch Joseph Peters. Nick watches as a big, broad shouldered man gets out of the car and adjusts the Villaño mask he’s wearing before walking up the 5 steps to the door. “Hola” the masked man says in a decidedly southern twang Nick Soapdish doesn’t know exactly how to react and is glad when Joseph Peters shows up to sort matters out “What’s going on” Peters says all confused as he stares at the huge Villaño “I dunno esse” The Villaño says in a poor Mexican accent “I tjust here for a dark man, Orale!” “Dark match?” Peters says, not buying the disguise for a minute “Si Hombre… against Akira no? I got dis ledda about it. It say “Villaño the 13” – dats me Esse” Villaño XIII says as he hands Peters a piece of paper “Villaño 13 huh? What’s the Spanish word for 13?” Peters asks, hoping to put a quick end to this charade “How would I know esse? I’m from Mexico! I no speak El Spanish… erm… amiga” “Villaño 13” says with a confused look in his eyes. “Bruce go away, you’re not allowed in the building” Peters curtly says, he doesn’t have time for this – he’s got less than one hour to Lockdown and a million things to sort out. “Who dis Bruce huh?? I Villaño the 13!! VIVA LA RAZOR!!” Joseph Peters just looks at Bruce in the mask, it’s OBVIOUSLY him, the “Too Violent for Lockdown” t-shirt kinda gives it away, along with his body size, unshaved chin and his *a-hem* “trademark” sent Bruce looks at Peters through the eyeholes of the mask trying to see if he is bluffing, but for once the scrawny federation official takes a stand, he will not have Bruce on the premises during HIS show. Finally Bruce just shrugs and walks off cursing under his breath “Of all the cheap, dumb ass, mother…” is that Joseph Peters can hear as Bruce Blank walks away, pulling off the Villaño mask as he heads towards the car and gets it. “This ain’t the last of it Peters!!” Bruce says before peeling out of the parking lot Joseph Peters turns to the referees and officials gathered around him with a sigh of relief. “Make sure he doesn’t get in, don’t let anyone in who’s not on our official roster” Peters says before heading back to his office, he has sponsors to smooze after all. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Justice 0 Report post Posted December 1, 2005 The Smartmarks Wrestling Federation presents SWF FAMILY FRIENDLY LOCKDOWN! LIVE, WEDNESDAY NOVEMBER 30th FROM THE SOLD OUT AIR CANADA CENTRE IN TORONTO, ONTARIO! Well, Joe P is really pissed off this time. After last week's Lockdown debacle, and the cancellation of several key sponsorship deals, da boss is taking no chances and making no exceptions. The rules of this week's Family Friendly Lockdown are going to be extra family friendly, and EXTRA militantly enforced! In addition to the "softer" match stips, and the usual rules, the following moves have been OUTLAWED by order of the commissioner's office! - Sleeper holds - Headlocks - Low blows - Any drops to the head or back of the neck - Any and all blows to the face - Repeated moves to one area of the body - cheap shots! - Moves from the top rope - Forcible exiting of the ring over the top rope Additionally, referees have discretion to issue warnings and outright disqualifications for any actions they percieve to be slights or otherwise unfair. Failure to shake hands at the beginning of a match is an immediate DQ! -=-=-=-=-=-=- MAIN EVENT SINGLES MATCH "Urban Legend" Todd Cortez vs Wildchild SPECIAL GUEST REFEREE: El Luchadore Magnifico In preperation for his title shot against El Luchadore Magnifico, Todd Cortez faces off against his tag partner at the last PPV, Wildchild, in a fair, sportsmanlike contest! An idea setting for Cortez to test his mettle and Wildchild to cool down in, after getting put through a table on Storm and being read the riot act by Johnny Dangerous. And who better, of course, than the World Champion himself to make sure the match remains fair and balanced? Rules: Standard singles match with Family Friendly rules - and you can be sure that Magnifico will enforce them to the letter. ELM can write if he so wishes to. TAG TEAM MATCH TKO vs Landon "La Cucaracha" Maddix and Jay Hawke It's a new Landon! With new moves, new hair, and a tutor that's intent on keeping an eye on him, Maddix and Hawke relive their match at Ashes to Ashes against the reigning tag champs, hoping for different, and hoping that Landon can put his best foot forward! Even better, in a much more... restrained... enviroment than their PPV contest. Rules: Tag team match with family friendly rules. PILLOW FIGHT MATCH "Hollywood" Spike Jenkins vs Ebony After the beating recieved at the hands of the World Champ, Spike now recieves a "softer" match to rest his wounds. And what softer opponent than the "cute and cuddly" Ebony? Rules: There are pillows scattered outside the ring - whomever hits their opponent with one 10 times wins. Nightgowns are optional. HOSTAGE MATCH Wes Davenport (as Dax Ryder) vs Johnny Dangerous A hostage, you say? On Family Friendly Lockdown!? Pish-posh, merely a bit of wholesome suspense! Returning to a role demanded by absoutely no-one, Wes Davenport should find this match premise familiar as he reprises his role as secret agent Dax Ryder from his direct-to-video hit "The Carnival Ryde". In this epic film, Ryder attempted to rescue his kidnapped partner Quayle (Andrew Shue) from rogue CIA agent Al Donahue (Michael Rooker), while dealing with the emotional drama in the resurfacing of his estranged ex-wife Shelly (Shannon Tweed). In this case, the hostage in question is the soon-to-be James Bond Daniel Craig, a man whose part Wes would kill to have, and his opponent would also, presumably, kill to have. Because who better to portray a rogue agent than our very own Johnny Dangerous? Sadly, there is no-one who can replicate Shannon Tweed's breasts. Still, can Johnny give a convincing preformance in his acting debut, or will Wes Davenport enjoy the only successful sequel he's ever made? Rules: Daniel Craig is tied to a chair somewhere in the arena with a "bomb" strapped to him. Wes must beat Johnny to Daniel to deactivate it, whereas Johnny must detonate it. Don't worry, though! The "bomb" is filled with bio-degradable, enviromentally friendly Gak™. If nobody reaches Daniel before the time limit expires (10:00), the "bomb" will go off and Johnny will be awareded a default victory. SINGLES MATCH Stryke vs Manson It's a match FOR THE AGES! Dating back to the era of the Junior Leagues, and countless times I'm sure in the SWF, Stryke and Manson once more settle down to do big battel! In a nice, friendly, sportsman like singles match atmosphere, of course. Will MANSONOSITY be unleashed on yet another unsuspecting victim on Family Friendly Lockdown!? Tune in to find out! Rules: Singles match with Family Friendly rules. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Justice 0 Report post Posted December 1, 2005 (edited) *KA-BOOOOOOOM!!!* *BANGBANGBANG!!!* *INSERT FIREWORKS SOUND EFFECT HERE!!!* A spectacular pyrotechnics display lights up the Air Canada Centre, thousands of screaming Canadians the opening image of the latest edition of Family-Friendly Lockdown!!! LDP: “Welcome everyone to SWF Lockdown! As always family-friendly rules are in effect tonight, but due to recent events things are going to be EXTRA friendly tonight.” King: “In large part due to the Hide and Seek match between Bruce Blank and Landon Maddix last Lockdown, I blame Maddix personally, CEO Joseph Peters has installed new rules to ensure there are no further ‘infringements’.” LDP: “No moves from or over the top rope, no head-dropping and no blows to the face are just the tip of the iceberg, the referees are on strict orders to disqualify for even the slightest breach so everyone is going to have to be on their best behavior tonight.” King: “Considering the styles and rulebreaking talents of a large portion of the SWF roster it’ll be a big adjustment for most, Stryke and Manson the lucky pair that get to test the waters first.” Right on cue Cypress Hill’s “How I Could Just Kill A Man” hits, a wall of blue & white pyrotechnics enveloping the stage and triggering the cheers of the crowd as Stryke steps through the smoke and sparks onto the stage! Stryke quickly heads down the ramp, slapping hands with as many fans on the way in true ‘family-friendly’ fashion as Funyon commences the introductions for the night. Funyon: “Ladies and gentlemen, the following contest is set for ONE FALL! Entering first, weighing 230 pounds from Sydney, Australia, STRYKE!!!” Stryke hops onto the apron, raising his arms and drawing strong applause from the sold-out crowd in attendance before climbing into the ring and preparing for the match at hand. LDP: “After a successful return match Stryke has been in a mini-slump since, losing to JJ Johnson at Ashes 2 Ashes and having his shoulders pinned to the mat by Wes Davenport in his last outing. Stryke has always been a very streaky wrestler, as capable of winning 5 straight as he is losing 10 in a row, so a win here is very important is he wants to get headed back in the right direction.” King: “Something much easier said than done when standing across the ring from the Raging Bull. Manson is one angry, powerful individual, and if Stryke thinks he’s going to walk out of here without one hell of a fight he’s in for a big shock, Manson will beat him right back to the unemployment line given half a chance.” The dimming of the house lights cues a wave of boos, Mastadon’s “Crusher Destroyer” accompanying Manson to the ring as multi-colored strobes flash and pulse in time with the music. Manson quickly moves down the ramp, never one of care about the insults and taunts of the fans but is especially on his best behaviour tonight, the only man Manson will be taking his frustrations out on is the pesky Australian standing in the center of the ring. Funyon: “Now making his way to the ring, weighing 260 pounds from Denver, Colorado, this is MANSON!!!” King: “The man with MANSONOSITY running through his veins looks JACKED tonight, maybe the best shape he’s ever been in. Stryke is going to have his hands full tonight, that’s for sure.” With both men in the ring referee Matthew Kivell brings them together, the mandatory handshake taking place as both men stare a hole through the other, neither backing down an inch. LDP: “Both these men go along way back, so in spite of that staredown there would be respect in that handshake. Both Stryke and Manson go back to the distant days of the IGNJL, debuting within a week of each other. They’ve teamed together, been stablemates and faced each other quite a few times, both holding wins over the other, so each man knows the other rather well.” King: “Those days were a long time ago though, each man has changed a lot since they’ve faced last so I say you can throw any familiarity out the window. With a 1-2 record since returning it would seem Stryke is still a tad rusty as well, so that is a factor that would push things into Manson’s favor tonight. Not that Manson needs any extra help to dispose of Stryke.” With the formalities out of the way Kivell leans over the ropes and signals for the bell, getting this match and the opening contest of Lockdown underway! DING DING DING! Manson, always the aggressor closes the gap on his opponent, locking up and using his momentum and extra 30 pounds of power to drive Stryke back towards the turnbuckles. Clearly out muscled takes a different approach to reverse, just before hitting the corner planting his back foot and making the most of his leverage advantage to spin Manson around and force him against the turnbuckles instead. The special orders of Joseph Peters to the referees is quickly apparent, Kivell on Stryke in a flash to force a clean break, and not eager to test Kivell’s leniency he just as quickly relents, stepping back and giving Manson the clean release. Stryke has perhaps over thought the stricter rules though and gives Manson a little too much leeway, enabling Manson to burst out of the corner and aim a haymaker directly at Stryke’s temple! The crowd gasps as they remember in particular rule banning ‘any and all blows to the face’, and Manson too remembers it just in time to stop himself, leaving his fist hovering inches short of Stryke’s face. Stryke flinches after nearly getting king-hit, but regains his composure quicker than Manson, stunning him with a swift kick to the midsection. LDP: “It hasn’t taken long for the new rules to play their part in tonight’s festivities, Manson nearly getting himself Disqualified not 30 seconds into the match!” King: “Manson, along with everyone else wrestling tonight, aren’t used to wrestling under such circumstances as these extra-family-friendly rules, so no doubt there will be instances like that where their instinctive behaviour could get them in trouble. Now a superior talent and wrestling mind like myself, I would never make such an error, but then I suppose I can’t hold everyone else to the same impossibly high standards I uphold everyday so I’ll go easy on them. For a while at least.” The Longdogger can only roll his eyes at his broadcast collegue as Manson is doubled over, and is soon down to one knee as Stryke pounds on his back with a hard forearm blow. Stryke takes Manson by the arm and whips him across the ring, Manson rebounding back and getting floored by a dropkick right to the chest, a cheer going up as Stryke attempts the first cover of the match! ONE… TWO… TH… NO, Manson comfortably rolls his shoulders off the mat. Stryke looks to keep the pressure on his opponent as he sits up, looking to keep Manson grounded with a side headlock as he would in any other match, but just before he locks it on he realises what he’s doing, the crowd breathing a sigh of relief as Stryke flings his arms back to avoid any contact that might even resemble a headlock of any variety. King: “I thought Stryke might have come prepared after that dropkick was smartly aimed away from the face, but after nearly sleepwalking his way into a loss by using a headlock it’s clear it’s just another night of the same old woefully inconsistent Stryke. Everybody backstage should be watching this match closely to ensure they don’t make the same mistakes as these men do.” With Stryke temporarily paused Manson grabs the window of opportunity, sweeping Stryke’s legs out from under him and dropping him on his back. With both men now down it’s a race to reach their feet first, and while the quicker Stryke is up a moment sooner it is Manson that is the more prepared, sending the Australian right back onto the canvas as Manson catches him in a deceptively fast and damaging STO, Manson keeping his arm draped across Stryke’s chest for the cover! ONE… TWO… THREE… NOO! With Manson’s less-than-textbook cover Stryke is able to thrust an arm skyward and get his shoulders up. Manson hops to his feet, waiting for Stryke to slowly sit up after having the wind knocked out of him, and as he does Manson springs off the ropes, charging in for a Running Knee! Again Manson is forced to halt mid-move though, no blows to the face putting his Running Knee out of the question. Stopping short Manson’s aggravating tendancies rise to the surface, motioning to slap the taste right out of Stryke’s mouth but as he rears back he has to stop a third time, Kivell right there to issue warnings any time it even looks like he MIGHT be going for something against the rules. The crowd instantly gets on Manson’s back as they see his frustration starting to boil, and it only gets worse as Manson’s delays allows Stryke to reach up and pull Manson down into a surprise Small Package!! ONE… TWO… THREEEE… NNOOOO!!! Despite being taken off-guard Manson still has the composure to kickout and break the pinfall in time. Both men climb up as quickly as possible following the kickout, Stryke looking to utilise his speed advantage to defeat the more powerful Manson as hits the ropes and uses his momentum off the ropes for a Clothesline, only to run straight into the clutches as Manson as he snaps on a Full Nelson! Jeers echo around the Air Canada Centre as the fans expect a signature Manson Dragon Suplex, but with no moves dropping the opponent on their head or neck allowed Manson is AGAIN out of luck! The problems on capitulate from there for the Raging Bull, while he still has Stryke in a Full Nelson it doesn’t last long as Stryke stomps down on Manson’s foot, Manson halfway letting out a swear as he yells “SHI-” before JUST catching himself in time, saving himself a no doubt severe fine but not saving the hold, Stryke slipping out of Manson’s grasp! Stryke keeps his fast paced approach going as he once more springs off the ropes, Manson moving to stop him in his tracks with a knee lift but Stryke sees this one coming, diving over it and pulling Manson down with another flash pinfall attempt! ONE… TWO… THREEEE… NNOOOOO!! Again Manson is able to kick out with time to spare, but has to expend precious energy to do so as Stryke’s pinfall attempts start piling up. Manson is far from a friendly individual at the best of times, but the way the match is going so far has REALLY started to get his anger level rising, if he was a cartoon smoke would be blowing out his ears. Stryke is up again and using the ropes once more as the crowd is now very behind the Australian, but the fans enthusiasm is set to be dampened very quickly as Stryke pushes his present strategy a little too far, Manson ready for Stryke’s charge this time as he catches him off the ropes and FLINGS him overhead with a Belly to Belly Suplex!! Manson gets plenty of snap on the move to ensure Stryke landed squarely on his back and not his head, Stryke crumpling up in a heap by the ropes on the opposite side of the ring as the boos flow freely at the matches sudden shift in momentum. King: “Playing hit-and-run is a nice strategy for a while, but sooner or later you’re going to get caught and Stryke just experienced the consequences of that right now. Manson’s most dangerous suplexes may have been eliminated but he still has more than enough tricks left up his sleeve to beat Stryke down with.” A look of pain is etched across Stryke’s face as he slowly pulls himself up with the assistance of the ring ropes, the imposing and intimidating figure of Manson stalking towards him not far behind. Stryke leans back on the ropes for support, but is quickly forced into action as Manson lets out a roar before aiming a Knife-Edge Chop at Stryke’s chest with all the force he can muster, Stryke dropping down and pulling himself under the ropes to the floor before the MANSONOSITY-fueled strike can connect! LDP: “We all remember what happened the Lockdown before Ashes 2 Ashes, obviously we can’t show you the footage on a family-friendly show like this, but a knife-edge chop from Manson caused Spike Jenkins to, well, die, and he may have just tried to do it again! King: “Good. Manson is fed up with all these rules banning 90% of his offence, but what I don’t see in these rules is any ban on chops, nor any accidents stemming from the unstoppable power of MANSONOSITY.” LDP: “Well, if sleepers and headlocks are banned then there’s surely at an implied ban on exploding your opponent into a heap of blood and meaty chunks of flesh…” King: “Implied nothing. MANSONOSITY doesn’t play by your little rules, Spike Jenkins might have recovered from his gory death, lets see if Stryke can do the same.” Kivell forces Manson to back up, allowing space for a cautious Stryke to re-enter the ring. As soon as he’s in Manson is on the attack with another chop, but Stryke is not keen on seeing his insides sprayed across the ring and ducks underneath taking Manson by the arm as he turns back and sending him into the ropes, setting himself as Manson rebounds back and lifting him up and over with a quickfire Hiptoss! Manson staggers to his feet, still looking to chop Stryke into tiny pieces, but is again taken over, this time by an Armdrag! A second Armdrag puts Manson on the canvas as he rises again, and this time Stryek stands over him, hooking his arms as he starts to rise in position for a Double Underhook Suplex! Stryke strains as he goes to lift Manson up, but the heavier Manson refuses to budge, before lifting his head and dumping Stryke with a backdrop! Stryke crawls back up in the corner, but has unwittingly got himself cornered in the turnbuckles, suddenly no where to run as Manson winds up, the awesome power of MANSONOSITY manifesting within his arm as he swings at Stryke, but the Australian in a last-ditch attempt to not be blown into chunks has pulled himself onto the second turnbuckle and VAULTS over Manson, hooking him into a desperation Sunset Flip! ONE… TWO… THREEEEEEEEE… YES!!! DING DING DING! Funyon: “The winner of this match via pinfall, STRYKE!!!” Stryke escapes the ring as quickly as possible, arms raised as much in victory as for having escaped the wrath of MANSONOSITY~! King: “What the hell? I wanted to see Stryke go SPLAT, he can’t do that!” LDP: “He can, and he did! A MANSONOSITY-themed death will have to wait for another time, King, because Stryke has escaped with the victory here in the opening contest of Lockdown! Stay tuned everyone, because we’ve got a lot more FAMILY-FRIENDLY action coming your way tonight!” Edited December 1, 2005 by Justice Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Justice 0 Report post Posted December 1, 2005 “Welcome back folks to super terrific happy family friendly Lockdown! We’re having a whale of a time this evening, and the exciting family friendly action on this family friendly edition of Lockdown is set to continue in a family friendly fashion!” Despite Longdogger Pete’s enthusiasm, and shameless shilling, the crowd seems restless as the camera pans through the Air Canada Centre. Wild, delirious cheering and celebration is instead replaced by a vast majority of the audience sitting on their hands and yawning. Even their signs convey their feelings, with “Yawn” and “Sigh” written in big black letters. The family (religious right) portion of the crowd is happy though! “As you can plainly see, the crowd is on absolute tenterhooks this evening, barely able to contain their excitement over the family friendly action they’ve witnessed so far on this family friendly night!” is the cry from the Dogger, who’s just happy to be employed. “Yes, this edition of super Family Friendly Lockdown sure has been a hoot and a half,” answers a stone faced, robot-like Suicide King, as Joseph Peters orders him via headset to “Look friendlier!” “Indeed it has good buddy! But now, we have a special treat in store for our SWF fans as we present to you,” Pete pauses for effect, “…the first ever SWF HOSTAGE MATCH!” Disclaimer: This match does not involve a real hostage, nor does the SWF condone hostage taking in any form. King grits his teeth as Peters tell him to be friendly with Longdogger, but the veteran cracks under pressure. “This is simply ludicrous! Whose bright idea was it for a damn Hostage Match!? This is a complete waste of time and a mockery of our sport!” “…But great family friendly entertainment!” Pete is quick to reply, giving two thumbs up to the camera. “Tonight, our own resident thespian, star of stage and screen himself Wes Davenport will reprise his role as Dax Ryder from the fantastic HIT-“ “HAH!” “… Huh?” “HAH!” “…HIT action suspense comedy drama thriller “The Carnival Ryde!” Wes will once again become the handsome, skilled and debonair secret agent Dax Ryder, in an attempt to rescue his partner Quayle, played by none other than the new James Bond, Daniel Craig!” “… Who?” “Daniel Craig!” “… Who the hell is Daniel Craig?” King blurts out, completely clueless as to the British actors identity, along with a majority of the audience. Pete continues to ignore his partner though, by company order, “But of course, the heroic Dax will have to match wits and cunning with his vile enemy, Rogue CIA agent Al Donahue, played by the SWF’s own vile rogue agent, Johnny Dangerous!” “This is a farce.” “Both men will start at opposite sides of the arena, and the first to find Daniel and activate, or deactivate the bomb before the ten minute timer goes will be declared the winner! If neither man finds Daniel in time, then the bomb will “detonate”, and poor Craig will be covered in Gak! Eww! Icky!” Disclaimer: Gak is completely bio-degradable and will not harm the environment. If ingested, please consult a doctor immediately. “…An absolute farce,” King says with a loud sigh, shaking his head disappointingly at his partner, who just shrugs off camera. “BUT, it does sound like it could possibly somehow be entertaining, especially if Dangerous succeeds where Michael Rooker did not. The only thing that could let this sequel down is a lack of the luscious Shannon Tweed. Why couldn’t she reprise HER role as Ryder’s estranged wife?” “Shannon Tweed was not deemed to be ‘family friendly’.” Pete informs his partner with a heavy heart as the two day dream of Tweed’s family unfriendly bits. “But nevertheless, we must soldier on! As we now cross to somewhere in the arena where Wes Davenport waits to begin this epic undertaking!” “That’s Dax Ryder, Damnit!” Davenport’s whiny Hollywood voice is heard yelling at Pete through his super secret agent headset, breaking character for a moment. He suddenly sees the red light on, and turns to the camera, frozen in place for a moment, before his manager’s hand appears from off-screen to prod him. Davenport suddenly remembers where he is, and darts away, trying to embody Dax Ryder once again. Luckily, this only entails wearing a tuxedo, talking with a low, guttural tone, and doing unnecessary but nonetheless impressive stunts. The out-of-work actor is determined to show his acting skill and impress some casting agents, and to do that, he needs to take this as seriously as possible. And he needs… a sidekick. “Are you real- ready, Dax?” asks Sexton Hardcastle, looking down at a makeshift script in his hands which Davenport had given him only two minutes before. And it shows. “This is a… suicide mission. Dax, I beg you… not to… go, there. It’s dangerous-s-s-s!” Sexton stutters, not exactly looking the part with his referee kit on. Davenport throws down his gun and grabs two fistfuls of Sexton’s collar, “DAMNIT, Jimmy! Tom needs me right now! He’s saved my life many times before, and I’ll be DAMNED if I’m going to stand by and do nothing!” “Tom? I thought it was Daniel.” Wes grits his teeth, remaining in the moment while motioning down towards the script. “Oh! Uh, but what… about the chief? He said-“ “The chief be DAMNED Jimmy! I’ll be DAMNED if I let his red tape stop me this time, because Tom’s in trouble, and I’ll make DAMNED sure I don’t stand idly by! Now let’s go!” Davenport releases Sexton, who wipes the spit from his face. Wes looks around intently, scanning the underground parking lot and finding the VIP close by. He holsters his gun and strides forward as the doors fly open in his wake. Sexton remains in the lot, shifting uneasily as the camera stays on him. Davenport’s arm suddenly appears in shot, pointing to his line. “What? Oh, uhm…N-No, Dax! Wait for… me, your loyal yet not… so handsome or daring sidekick!” The clock is now ticking. “What the hell is this?” Johnny Dangerous watches a nearby monitor on his side of the arena, just inside the main entrance. He shakes his head in disbelief as he watches Davenport somersault around every corner for absolutely no reason. “This is fuckin’ ridiculous! I should be gunning for my shot at the World Title, but instead, I’m playing a game of god damned hide and seek!” “Remember your language,” Joseph Peters whispers, but a camera is yet to find Johnny, allowing the REAL secret agent to vent his frustrations. “Oh calm down, there’s no one around. I can’t believe I’ve been put in this position! You saw what happened on Storm, Joseph, I advanced in the tournament, and I should be wrestling in the… freakin’ finals instead of wasting my time with this.” “I did see what happened on Storm,” Peters answers, the events still fresh in his mind, which were none too pleasing for the CEO. “’Wildchild versus Johnny Dangerous’. It was going to be a money match that everyone wanted to see. Do you know how many viewers we lost because of your little stunt?” “But I don’t-“ “-But NOTHING!” Joseph shouts back at Dangerous as Johnny bites his tongue. “Not only did you lay Wildchild out, ending the match prematurely, but you enlisted the help of BRUCE FUCKING BLANK!” “Oh, so you can swear and I-“ “SHUT UP!” The CEO stops and takes his handkerchief, wiping his brow, trying to calm himself down; the subject of Blank is still a tender one it seems. “Look, I have to appease our shareholders and our sponsors, and they want some light hearted entertainment, and this is the perfect remedy. So I suggest, for your sake, that you play along.” Joseph Peters storms away in a huff, leaving Dangerous, still shaking his head as he watches Davenport throw a smoke grenade into an empty hallway. Suddenly, a cameraman comes running up to Johnny, and the secret agent decides to bite the bullet, staring into the lens, doing his best to sound sincere as Peters looks back at him. “… You’ll never find him in time, Dax, mark my words. I will stop you.” Simply uttering those words causes Johnny to wince, sickened with himself as he trudges up the stairs. Wes hears this message from a monitor nearby and clenches his fist, only more determined to find his partner. “Well, those are some startling developments folks!” Shouts Pete,. “Both Dax and Donahue have set off in search for Tom Quayle, but where is the kidnapped hostage!? With only 9 minutes left on the clock, Dax better hurry to save his partner!” “Oh my god, not you too,” mutters King, finding this whole situation unbearable. “I expected this of Davenport, since he has a few screws loose, but I expected Dangerous to rise above this! Now it seems we’re going to be treated with a formulaic B-grade action movie with cheesy dialogue and bad acting with a lame pay off.” “Just pipe down you negative Nancy, this will be some good, wholesome fun, which we don’t get to see much these days.” “… Negative Nancy?” “This way, DAMNIT…” “Stop saying that,” Sexton mutters, breaking character. Wes creeps around a corner, finding a long, lavish corridor. He motions for Sexton to follow, and the two hug the wall, passing doors leading to corporate boxes. Suddenly, Davenport stops, calling for Sexton and the camera man to halt. He looks up at the door in front of him, which reads ‘Dan Quayle.’ “This has to be it,” Davenport utters quietly, trying to listen to whatever’s going on inside the room. “You’ve got to be joking,” Hardcastle responds, not buying it. “They’d never make it this easy.” “DAMNIT Jimmy,” Davenport says, grabbing him by the collar again, “this is a sign, my friend is behind these doors, I just know it. Ask yourself, why would our 44th Vice President be here now, watching the SWF? “…” “That’s RIGHT, he wouldn’t be! It’s a clue, no doubt. All right, on the count of 3…” Davenport takes a few steps back, arm out, and ready to burst in. Unbeknownst to him, Johnny Dangerous is already inside, waiting behind the door, watching Davenport on a nearby TV. “Remember Mr. Quayle, just act natural…” Davenport readies himself, counting down, but Sexton still isn’t convinced. “This just-“ “ONE!” “-Makes-“ TWO!” “-No-“ “THREE!” “-Sense!” *BAM!* The doors to the box fly open, but Davenport is shocked to find Mr. and Mrs. Quayle standing in the middle of the room, surprised by the sudden intrusion. Davenport is disappointed, but salutes the former Vice President. “I’m sorry, Sir, didn’t mean to intrude.” “That’s all right, Son.” Suddenly, Dangerous springs into action and with a wine bottle in his hand… “… LOOK OUT!” Quayle shouts, but it’s too late! *CRASH!* The wine bottle smashes across Davenport’s skull, sending the actor flying back into the wall! “My god, you’re such a predictable idiot, Wes” Dangerous quips, pleased with his work. “What a turn of events!” Pete announces. “That dastardly Donahue lays a trap for Ryder and instead of finding Quayle himself, is going to stop Dax from doing the same!” “I can’t believe I’m going to say this, but Sexton is right, this just makes no sense.” The blow to the head suddenly knocks some sense into Davenport, as he finds Dangerous charge towards him, spearing him against the wall! “This isn’t one of your movies, Wes,” Johnny tells him, grabbing him by the hair; “this isn’t a real sequel.” *BAM!* Johnny throws Davenport against the opposite wall, following the actor as he stumbles away down the hall. “Your acting career is over. You thought you could impress someone? Give me a break!” Wes holds his head as he stumbles up to the bar, trying to gain a sense of his surroundings. Sexton, now free of his sidekick role, watches on as Johnny grabs a beer from the bar, chugging down half of it- Disclaimer: Drink in moderation. -and then breaking the rest of it across Davenport’s back! “Ok, this is starting to get out of hand,” Pete admits, finally becoming himself again. “Before it was just some harmless fun, but now Johnny has gone over the line! Wes was just playing along, trying to entertain the fans, but now Johnny has put a stop to all that!” “A match is a match,” King replies with a snicker. “Johnny wants to win, as simple as that, and to do that, he has to prevent Davenport from finding Daniel Craig. And he’s doing that. By beating the tar out of him. ” “There may be some truth to that King, but Johnny might only anger Joseph Peters further. Whatever the case may be, there’s only six minutes left on the clock before James Bond is covered in goo!” “There’s only one Secret Agent around here.” Johnny continues rambling on as Davenport retreats, suddenly realizing the severity of the situation. His opponent is in no mood for games, and with those bottles to the head, he’s not pretending. Wes stumbles through a set of double doors that swing open on contact, and he finds himself in the restaurant of the Air Canada Centre. Wes runs into a table as many employees’ scatter, watching one fake Secret Agent, and one Real Secret Agent duke it out. “Well, this has been a barrel of laughs, but I’m afraid I must be off.” Johnny becomes ever more like Al Donahue by the minute as he hits Davenport with his one-liners. He hopes to hit him with something even harder as he shuffles forward, aiming a Johnny Kick right towards Wes’ jaw! *CRASH!* -but Wes ducks out of the way, picks up a porcelain plate and smashes it across Johnny’s head! The sight of blood on both men’s heads infuriates Peters as he watches on from backstage, but neither are going down for the count yet as Davenport kicks Dangerous in the gut, grabbing his head and arm and lifting him up and over, suplexing him onto the round wooden table! *SMASH!* A vase of flowers shatters underneath Johnny on impact, as the employee’s give Wes a polite round of applause despite the small restaurant looking a little worse for wear. Wes hazily walks out into a big open area, with pylons dotted all around and concessions stands against the wall. Wes stumbles across to the nearest booth, asking the attendant through his huffing and puffing, “Have you seen… Daniel… Craig?” “…Who?” “Never mind…” *BAM!* Suddenly, Wes is hit from behind and thrown over the counter by Johnny Dangerous, recovering as fast as they do in the movies! A cameraman finally appears on scene as Dangerous dusts himself off and straightens up his suit while the attendant kneels down to check on Wes, handing him replica International title belt at the same time! As Dangerous leans over, grabbing a fistful of Wes’ hair- *BAM!* -the actor reaches up and nails him with the title belt! Johnny’s cut only opens up further as he stumbles backward towards the stairs leading to the inner arena. Davenport, his insecurity vanishing for the moment, chases him with the replica international title in hand. But as he reaches Johnny, ready to paste him with the belt once again, he looks past him, past the seats, past the crowd and looks down into the centre of the ring... … Seeing an English man strapped into a chair, a makeshift bomb tied to the seat! “Wes has found Daniel Craig, and he’s right in front of us, in the centre of the ring!” Pete cries, trying to sound surprised. “Yes, its funny how we didn’t see him until now,” King replies, totally deadpan. “He better hurry though, only three minutes remain!” Wes suddenly remembers filming Carnival Ryde and almost the exact same scene being played out (minus the thousands of fans and replace an arena with a carnival fun house). Davenport eagerly runs towards the stairs that lead down into the crowd, but Johnny has other ideas as he reaches down and trips the actor off his feet! Davenport turns over and kicks Johnny away into a pylon, then climbs to his feet, charges towards the Secret Agent with a clothesline! But Johnny ducks! Wes stops just a hairs breadth away from the stone pylon, but as he turns back around- *SMACK!* -his face meets Johnny’s boot as he clobbers him with the Johnny Kick! “Don’t put your foot in your mouth, Dax.” Johnny snickers to himself, realizes that doesn’t actually make sense, then runs down the steps, making his way through the sea of fans who don’t take kindly to his villainous ways, but he just shrugs them off. “And Johnny gets a head start on Davenport for the race to the bomb,” Pate cries, “and if he detonates that bomb, it’s all over!” “With only a minute remaining, it’s a foregone conclusion.” King reports, happily. “Davenport may have out acted, Johnny but Johnny out fought Davenport!” The Secret Agent finally reaches ringside as he jumps over the guard rail, casually strolling to the ring much to the crowd’s chagrin. Suddenly, they all look up to Johnny’s point of entry, finding Davenport standing triumphantly! They begin to cheer, but as the clock appears on the screen, counting down from the thirty second mark, they begin to worry. Wes reaches into his pocket and takes out takes out a strange device, which confuses everyone. Johnny looks up to the rafters, but just grins as he enters through the ropes. Wes suddenly throws his arm into the air, pointing the device towards the structural supports high on the roof and- *BANG!* -a hook shoots out, impaling itself in the steel! With a firm grip, Davenport takes hold of the super strong cable and presses a button on the device, propelling himself forward, high into the air, and swinging down towards the ring! Dangerous shakes his head in disbelief as he turns back around, finding the actor flying towards him! *BAM!* -and kicking him square in the chest! Johnny is knocked back over the ropes as Davenport lets go, landing safely in front of Daniel Craig! “Bloody fine job there,” the only working actor in the ring says with relief, “now get me out of this!” Davenport whips out a pair of wire cutters, snipping the wires and disarming the bomb with 2 seconds to spare! The crowd begins to roar as the bell is rung! “DING! DING! DING!” “Get Over It” begins to play as Daniel Craig gets up from his chair, raising the out of work actor’s hand in the air in victory! “The winner of the first ever Hostage Match… WES DAVENPORT!” “King,” Pete says without a tinge of emotion, “that may be one of the weirdest matches with the weirdest ending to I have ever seen.” “I think it’s best we don’t mention this for a while. If ever.” Davenport relishes the spotlight once again as he and Craig circle the ring. “Thanks mate,” Craig whispers. “It would have been quite embarrassing for me if James Bond were covered in goo like that!” “You’re… the new bond? YOU!? I WANTED THAT PART!” Suddenly Davenport lifts Craig into the air and drives him into the canvas with a Spinebuster! Then, Keifer Sutherland enters the ring and throws a walkie talkie at Craig. Then Daniel Craig blows up. (But not Thoth) Then Keifer and Davenport celebrate drinking Gin. FADE OUT Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Justice 0 Report post Posted December 1, 2005 The camera FADES IN to see The Divine Wind and Mr. Kobe on the SmarkTron. ‘Oh, what does this guy have to say, after he disgraced the Villano name—“ King starts, but he is interrupted by Akira, clearing his throat. Akira beings to speak in Japanese, but after a few seconds, a Mr. Kobe voice over plays, and Akira’s voice is hard to make out. “I’ve never been one with words,” the voice over plays. “But I’ll try and get my point out as quick as possible, Bruce,” it continues. “Two weeks ago, you introduced your pathetic cruiserweight challenge. But it was never about Cruiserweights, or any other weight limit.” Kobe’s robotic American translation says. “It was about you going the easy way out of making a name for yourself. I couldn’t believe you were bringing in my idol! I was ecstatic. I went all over the place looking for Jyushin!” Both voices pause. “And then you make him part of your stupid game” Akira continues, followed by Kobe “ On Storm, The Villano XIII gimmick was hardly about me getting back at you for disgracing a great puroresu. No, not at all. I just wanted to get your attention. And I’m pretty sure I have it now” Akira stops, and clears his throat again. “I’m not on the card this week, so I’m here for one reason. A challenge.” Kobe’s translation still has no emotion, but you can hear it in Akira. “At the Christmas Pay Per View, I want a shot at your Ultra Violent title. You can even have your choice of match.” Akira finishes abruptly, and the camera fades to the next segment. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Justice 0 Report post Posted December 1, 2005 SWF Lockdown returns from commercial break as the Toronto crowd cheer on the return of their favorite wrestling company. “We are live with SWF Lockdown!” says the welcoming voice of Longdogger Pete, “Coming up next…is the Pillow Fight match!” “Just the match we were all waiting for!” “After being attacked by SWF World Champion, El Luchadore Magnifico, SWF management has decided to give Spike Jenkins…well…a cozy little match. So tonight, a Pillow Fight between Jenkins and EBONY!” “Yippee,” yawns the sarcastic Suicide King. The lights flicker and several of them turn green, and the others drop out, leaving the ring and the ramp way bathed in a mixture of darkness and green light. As images of a knife and a glowering pair of green eyes flicker across the Smarktron, the sound of Alice Cooper's "Poison" begins to sound from the speakers, echoing over the arena as the fans await. "Your cruel device Your blood, like ice One look could kill My pain, your thrill!" Black and green pyrotechnics explode across the ramp like machinegun fire, and the crowd roars in appreciation. The sound dies down to a mixture of cheers and boos as the black cat suited figure of Ebony strides through the smoke. With a smirk on her face, she looks left and right at the fans, either bowing mockingly or flipping the occasional hooting male off. She spares a wink for the occasional lady, as well. Standing in the middle of the ring, Funyon raises the microphone in his hand. “The following contest is a PILLOW FIGHT MATCH! First, making her way to the ring, weighing in at Two Hundred Pounds! She hails from Parts Unknown…she is EBONY!!!” Ebony leaps up onto the apron, climbs over the top rope, and mounts the turnbuckles and lifts her arms, leaning in the direction of a female fan to give them a good look. She then hops off the ropes and waits in the ring for her opponent, or for the match to start. “AND HER OPPONENT!” Every light in the arena goes to full power as the Smarktron whites out. For a moment the only sound is that of a needle scratching over vinyl... And then *BAM* The crashing guitars of Lamb of God’s “Black Label” send a bolt through the crowd. The drumming sends a jolt throughout the arena, as the pace of the intro begins to pick up. Finally… “AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH” The high-pitched scream of Randy Blythe breaks through the speakers as the bright white lights begin flashing at the entranceway. As the scream hits the crowd, Spike walks out wearing a black hoodie on, the hood covering most of his face. Spike drops down to one knee, leaving one arm to hang to the ground, while the other is firmly placed on his knee. After a few moments, Spike raises both arms into an “X”, symbolizing his Straight Edge life style. Spike rises to his feet and begins to make his way down the isle towards the ring. “Coming to the ring, weighing in at a total of Two Hundred and Twenty Pounds! He hails from Hollywood, California…he is “HOLLYWOOD” SPIIIIIIIIIIIIIKE JEEEEEEENKINNNNNNSSSSSS!” Spike makes his way completely around the ring and rolls underneath the bottom rope. He continues rolling until he hits dead center in the middle of the ring. Spike rises to one knee and resumes the position he was in at the top of the entranceway. One arm hanging to the ground, the other placed on his knee. Finally, Spike rises to his feet. He quickly peels off the hood, releasing his blonde, dyed hair free. He puts his arms together, forming an “X” across his chest, again promoting his Straight Edge life style. “Spike looks rather annoyed with the match he has been placed in tonight.” “Yeah, well maybe next time he’ll rethink trying to attack El Luchadore Magnifico from behind and getting beaten down!” “That’s not how it happened, King…” Spike and Ebony enter the center of the ring and shake hands, following the rules of Family Friendly Lockdown. With that, the bell rings and the Pillow Fight is underway! “And here we go!” Ebony immediately shoots herself towards the ropes and exits the ring. She grabs a pillow from the floor and rolls back into the ring, onto her feet. Jenkins stares at her, not having moved from his spot, as the ferret charges at him. Pillow outstretched over her head, she dives at the former SWF Cruiserweight and Tag Team Champion…only for him to simply step out of the way. Spike holds his foot out and as Ebony completely misses Jenkins, trips over his foot and falls face first to the mat! “Either Spike Jenkins is really smart, or Ebony is slightly clueless.” “Well, we both know Jenkins isn’t really smart,” laughs King. As Ebony crashes to the mat, the pillow flies out of her hands. Jenkins, just wanting to get out of here, picks the pillow off the mat and simply begins poking away at Ebony. ONE! TWO! THREE! FOUR! FIVE! SIX! SEVEN! EIGHT! NINE! TEN! *Ding Ding Ding* “And this match is over!” “Match of the year candidate…this is not.” “Well, it WAS a Pillow Fight, King.” “Here is your winner…“Hollywood” Spiiiiiiiiiike Jeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeenkinnnssssssss!!!!” booms Funyon over the house microphone. “Black Label” starts up as Jenkins slips out of the ring and makes his way to the back. “Spike Jenkins will be facing The Masked Crusader in the First Round of the Cold Front Classic! He will fight his way to get a rematch against El Luchadore Magnifico, the man that attacked him on Storm for the SWF World Heavyweight Title!” “Which he won’t win,” remarks The Suicide King. “But after tonight’s run in with Cucaracha International, how will it affect him and his friends, Zyon and Akira? Only in time will we find out!” “Speaking of which, Cucaracha International will be going up against TKO in Tag Team Action! Landon Maddix and Jay Hawke are going to get revenge against the men who stole THEIR tag team titles and won that dreaded ladder match at Ashes 2 Ashes!” “Plus, the main event. Todd Cortez, the man challenging El Luchadore Magnifico for the SWF World Heavyweight Title will go one-on-one with Wildchild! All this and more on Family Friendly Lockdown!” Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Justice 0 Report post Posted December 1, 2005 “-I’m telling you,” King says insistently, “it’s a travesty that JJ Johnson is unbooked in the Air Canada Arena! Air Canada! That’s the name of one of his finishers!” “Come on,” Pete snorts, “how many times has he used it since he joined the SWF? Two? Three? And do you mean to tell me that the two spins on it actually make it any more devastating than a normal moon-” “Hello fans, and welcome back to Lockdown!” Suicide King cuts in desperately, nudging LDP in the ribs and nodding towards the camera in what he hopes is an unobtrusive way, “we’re back here in the Air Canada Arena, and what a night of entertainment we still have to come!” “Oh please,” Pete replies, “how can you use the word ‘entertainment’ when Landon Maddix is up… next…?” There is a brief pause. (“King - why are you saying my lines?”) (“Well, you weren’t saying them!”) (“Well now we’ve both broken kayfabe. Well done!”) (“Maybe if the goons in the production truck can take a damn hint we can send it to Funyon and get the match started!”) (“King, you just said damn on Super Family Friendly Lockdown!”) (“…so did you.”) (“Oh yeah. Damn.”) Finally someone in the truck takes pity on the pathetic duo, kills their mics for the moment so they can receive “re-education” by Joseph Peters over their headsets, and cuts the camera to the ring where Funyon stands. Being something more of a consummate professional than Suicide King and Longdogger Pete, the veteran ring announcer knows exactly where he should speak and he raises his mic accordingly: “Ladies and gentlemen, the following non-title tag team contest is scheduled for one fall and will be contested under Family Friendly Rules,” he booms. “Introducing first…” ‘PREPARE… FOR… LANDON!” *waaaaaaaaaaaah* *DUM-DUM* The Canadian crowd sets up a massive booing as the opening of ‘Megalomaniac’ by Incubus kicks up over the PA system and the Smarktron begins to flash up images of Landon Maddix flipping his hair, hitting the Crash Landon and applying the Land of Nod to various unfortunate opponents. The man himself makes his way onto the stage with his sleeveless leather trenchcoat on, an item of clothing that he plucks at mournfully as if it could be the last time he’ll see it… and the reason why is following him, as Incubus seamlessly segues into ‘Learning To Fly’ by Pink Floyd, and Jay Hawke makes his way out! “…weighing in tonight at a combined weight of 433lbs,” Funyon booms, “the team of the SWF International Champion, ‘The Dean of Professional Wrestling’ Jay Hawke, and Landon ‘La Cucaracha’ Maddix… CUCA-RA-CHAAAAAA… INNNNNNN-TERNAAAAAAAA-CIONAAAAAAALLLLLLLL!!” “BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” Hawke and Maddix make their way down the ramp, jawing with the fans as they go. Landon for one certainly seems to be in an uncertain mood and appears to be going over things in his head as he silently repeats things to himself. Hawke appears much more confident, as befits the longest-reigning champion in SWF history. “You know Dogger,” King says, “I’ve heard rumours that Jay Hawke and JJ Johnson have been doing their best to teach Landon how to actually wrestle. I must say, I admire their courage.” “Like him or not, and like it or not, Landon’s style has already brought him the longest ICTV title reign ever, and a World Title,” Pete replies. “The kid has great potential and a solid wrestling background can only help that; it’s just a shame that he’s a real… poopyhead.” “Did you just say-” “Yes, I did. Now be quiet.” Maddix and Hawke climb into the ring where they divest themselves of their robe, coat and title belt and Jay goes to hand the International strap to the referee… then comes up short, because there is no referee! Confused, the two CI members look around before shrugging. No doubt there’s an explanation. Meanwhile, something else grabs their attention as the lights inside the Air Canada Arena drop. The pulsing electronic beats of ‘Tribe’ by Mad Capsule Markets start up and strobes begin to bathe the crowd in flickering light while the Smarktron begins to flash up three repeating letters: T K O “YEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!” The cheer is quite healthy, and it only increases in volume as two familiar figures appear at the top of the entrance ramp silhouetted by the flashing screens behind them. With images of the Tiger Explosion, the TKO Spike and assorted cheating going on behind them the two men wait until the guitar riff starts, the begin making their way down the ramp. Hushed Japanese chanting starts up, and then as the chorus kicks in pyro goes off and the lights come up with a bang! *BOOOM!!* ‘TRIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIBE! Why don’t you strike, justify your mind?’ “And their opponents, accompanied to the ring by Chris Card Enterprises; from Saitama Prefecture, Japan,” Funyon bellows, “at a combined weight of 483lbs, they are the reigning SWF Tag Team Champions; TORU Takahara and KOJI Kitano… TEE! KAY!! OOHHH!!!” TORU and KOJI are wearing their vinyl trenchcoats hanging open so Maddix and Hawke can see the Tag Titles that adorn their waists, a fact that isn’t lost on Cucaracha Internacional. TKO just grin and flip their opponents the double bird. “Do we really need to go over the history here?” Pete asks as TKO shrug off their coats and hand them to Natasha. “We all know that TKO first stole the tag titles from Cucaracha Internacional, then there was that whole business with David Blazenwing being used as a decoy to get them back, and then the bruising ladder match at Ashes 2 Ashes which resulted in the belts changing hands officially, and most recently TORU stopped Jay Hawke from advancing in the Cold Front Classic when he pinned him following a Frog Splash!” “That’s all well and good Dogger,” King says, “but I’m getting a message in my ear that Joseph Peters doesn’t trust these two teams to stick to the Family Friendly rules, which is why he’s organised a special referee for tonight’s match!” “A special referee…?” TKO have entered the ring and the two teams are staring each other down; violence seems likely to erupt at any second, but then Funyon raises his microphone: “And introducing your special guest referee…” ‘CUT MY LIFE INTO PIECES! THIS IS MY LAST RESORT!’ “The hell!?” King says as Papa Roach’s ‘Last Resort’ kicks up over the speakers. “I hate to say it, but I recognise that music!” ‘SUFFOCATION, NO BREATHING! DON’T GIVE A -beep- IF I’M COMING HOME BLEEDING!’ A figure which is familiar for a different reason has now appeared at the top of the entrance ramp, attired in the traditional black-and-white referees shirt, and is now making his way down to the ring. And looks rather pissed. “...DAVID BLAZENWING!!” Funyon finishes, before getting the hell out of Dodge. Blazenwing rolls under the ropes with both teams staring at him, gets to his feet and doesn’t even call for the mandatory handshake, instead motioning immediately for the bell! *DING-DING-DING!* “We’re underway here, but what a shock this is!” Longdogger Pete calls as TKO and Cucaracha Internacional charge at each other and begin laying in with lefts and rights,” David Blazenwing, the man that Landon fooled into helping his team steal back the title belts, the man who TKO beat up, and the man who then delayed JJ Johnson at Ashes 2 Ashes to prevent him from interfering, has been named as referee by Joseph Peters! I can only assume that Peters knows that Blazenwing isn’t going to let either of these teams get away with anything, and as a former SWF… wrestler… he can handle himself in there!” “Are you watching the same match I am Pete?” King says in disbelief, pointing at the ring, “he’s not doing anything! TKO and Cucaracha Internacional are tearing each other apart! They should both have been DQ’d by now, and Blazenwing’s letting them go at it!” Sure enough, rather than enforce law and order with a heavy hand David Blazenwing is standing back and letting things take their course. The camera focuses on Jay Hawke picking out TORU’s head with a stiff right, followed by a left jab, only for Takahara to block a third punch and bull forward with a flurry of slaps to the face that send the International Champion into retreat. Meanwhile Landon ducks a KOJI roundhouse kick and starts firing elbows into the TKO cruiserweight’s face, before realising that getting caught in a striking contest with a blackbelt probably isn’t a plan, so he goes to the eyes instead! KOJI turns away, blinded, and Landon jumps up before grabbing Kitano by the head and pulling him down backwards to drive his knees into KOJI’s back with the Mount Crushmore. KOJI rolls out of the ring underneath the bottom rope and Landon gets back to his feet to find TORU has driven a couple of devastating knees into Hawke’s gut and has underhooked him in preparation for the Tiger Driver - Landon darts across the ring and lashes out with his boot to catch the Japanese Hammer in the back of the head with a Maddix Kick! ‘What was that?’ Chris Card calls to the referee, but Blazenwing ignores him and signals for the match to continue. Maddix is only too eager to comply with the referee’s instructions and he signals something to Jay Hawke, something involving some lifting… “It looks like Maddix could be dusting off a move from his days in the House of Todd,” Pete says, “because he could be about to Convert The Sinner!” “Bah, it’ll always be the Gavel Bang to me,” King replies haughtily. Sure enough Maddix fires TORU into the ropes and takes up a position halfway between the ropes and the waiting Jay Hawke; unfortunately Maddix has overestimated the grogginess that TORU feels after the Maddix Kick, as the big man rebounds off the cables faster than expected and instead of receiving a flapjack he flattens the Next Generation with a shoulderblock, barely breaking stride before going on to deliver a thunderous running knee smash into the gut of the surprised and flat-footed Jay Hawke, sending the Dean of Professional Wrestling tumbling through the ropes and to the floor! “YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!” “T!K!O!” “T!K!O!” TORU raises one arm in salute (middle-fingered, of course) to the TKO Section at ringside before turning back around to deal with Landon- *CHING!* “Low blow!” Pete hollers as Landon slams his forearm up between the legs of the Japanese Hammer. “Had Landon lost his mind? He’s certainly lost the match!” “Uhh… actually, he hasn’t,” King replies. Sure enough, despite the fact that TORU Takahara has collapsed and is clutching at his happy-happy-joy-joy area, Blazenwing slaps his inner thigh to indicate where he considers the blow to have landed! Landon, who seemingly lashed out through survival instinct rather than ring sense, throws a surprised but grateful look at the referee before scrambling on top for the pin. Blazenwing drops to count…. ONE! … …and TORU kicks out! “Did that count seem slow to you, King?” Pete asks uncertainly. “No, that’s about as fast as a pin should be counted when it’s Maddix doing it,” Suicide King responds. Maddix quirks an eyebrow at the speed of Blazenwing’s count but decides that he’s probably lucky to have got away with the low blow, and instead moves onto placing one hand on TORU’s throat and squeezing! Blazenwing looks bored for a second before seemingly realising that he’s meant to count again… ‘ONE!’ ‘TWO!’ ‘THREE!’ ‘…erm…’ KOJI is back on the apron and screaming at Blazenwing, but the former SJL star seems to have forgotten what comes after ‘three’ and Landon continues to choke! With a Japanese curse on his lips, Kitano steps through the ropes and proceeds to paste Landon in the back of the head with a well-placed boot before stepping back out again. La Cucaracha takes this moment to decide that discretion is the better part of valour and rolls to where Jay Hawke has taken up station, then tags his partner in. The Dean evidently has payback on his mind and rushes over to where TORU is starting to rise, then starts to hammer sharp elbows onto the back of his opponent’s neck. TORU winces but continues to try and force his way up, so Hawke instinctively slaps on a headlock to get him under control… and Blazening leans through the ropes, beckoning Funyon over! “Ladies and gentlemen,” Funyon booms as Blazenwing hurries over to pry Hawke off TORU, “I have been informed by the referee that in accordance with Family Friendly rules, Jay Hawke has been issued with a warning for the use of a headlock! Any further application of headlocks by Jay Hawke will lead to a disqualification!” “What!?” Pete yelps in shock, “I thought Blazenwing was ignoring the rules! It certainly seemed like it!” “I think he’s ignoring some rules, Pete,” King replies. “Basically, I don’t think our friend Blazenwing is going to follow Joseph Peter’s instructions and keep order - he wants these two teams to kill each other, and he wants them to do it quickly. So; no headlocks!” With his headlock apparently outlawed, Jay Hawke switches to... a front facelock. Blazenwing seems about to call for the bell but before he can Hawke drops backwards with a DDT, spiking TORU's head into the mat! The Dean then gets to his feet and casually rakes the heel of his boot across TORU's face, temporarily blinding the Japanese Hammer. "JAY HAWKE SUCKS!" "JAY HAWKE SUCKS!" Hawke doesn't seem that interested in what the fans think and grabs TORU's hair to haul him back to his feet, then grabs his opponent's wrist and Irish whips Takahara towards the cables. As the big man rebounds towards him Hawke jumps into the air, looking for a leg lariat, but TORU's vision seems to have recovered enough to warn him of imminent danger and the Tag Champion ducks under Hawke's leg, then heads on to the far ropes. Jay lands on his feet and turns around to try and draw a bead on his elusive opponent, but TORU is moving faster than he thought and the big man explodes back at him before vaulting up off Hawke's left leg to catch the International Champion in the back of the head with a Shining Enzuigiri! *CRACK!* "YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" That's enough to bring the fans back to life and the crowd explodes as Hawke slumps forward onto his face; meanwhile TORU shakes his head to clear it and wipes at his eyes, then focuses on the corner where KOJI is waiting for him. The smaller man has his hand out waiting for a tag and TORU isn't going to disappoint: *smak* With KOJI the legal man TORU picks Jay Hawke up, then Irish whips the International Champion into the ropes, at right angles from the ones he just exploded off. On Hawke's return TORU scoops him up under one arm as if for a sidewalk slam, but before he drops he turns around to allow KOJI to grab an reverse headlock, then they drop with a sidewalk slam/inverted DDT combo! Takahara then proceeds to roll out under the ropes while KOJI steps on Hawke's throat and gives him the double bird as he chokes him! David Blazenwing leaps into action as before… ‘ONE!’ ‘TWO!’ ‘…’ Landon has seen enough and runs into the ring but KOJI rounds on him and the Cockroach holds up his hands and backs off, not eager to run straight into a roundhouse! Kitano seems to ignore him after that and turns back to Hawke, allowing Landon a clear shot at his back which Maddix leaps to take- *CRACK!* -and only succeeds in running into a standing sidekick, which KOJI didn’t even have to look around in order to connect with! Maddix ends up on his back with a strong stinging sensation in his jaw, and KOJI picks Hawke up and then snapmares him onto Maddix, before kicking him hard in the back! “Does everyone use that combo these days?” Pete is heard to sigh as Hawke gasps in pain and clutches at his spine. Hawke isn’t in much of a position to complain about unoriginality though, as he rolls off his tag partner. Blazenwing orders Landon to the outside and when the Cockroach doesn’t seem too receptive to his demands the referee grabs Landon’s arm and physically tows him to his corner, then shoves him under the bottom rope to the apron where Maddix narrowly avoids falling to the floor! Meanwhile KOJI has towed Hawke back towards the TKO corner where he tags TORU back in before applying a standing surfboard to the unfortunate International Champion. TORU then climbs to the top rope and leaps off, driving his knee into the back of Hawke’s head with the TORU Hammer before both members of TKO stand side-by-side and catch their sunglasses that are thrown to them by Chris Card, then strike a pose with their arms folded! “YEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!” “T!K!O!” “T!K!O!” Blazenwing isn’t impressed by posing and orders KOJI to leave the ring - the smaller member of the Tag Champions gives him the middle finger but obeys, leaving TORU in the ring with Hawke. The big man picks his opponent up and gutwrenches him onto his shoulder, then slams Hawke down again over one big knee with a gutbuster that drives all the wind from the International Champion! Jay ends up on his back and TORU starts climbing the ring post of his own corner; once he reaches the top the big man faces out to the crowd, gives them all the double bird and then moonsaults backwards, a HUGE leap that brings him down squarely on top of Jay Hawke… *CRUNCH!* …or more accurately, his knees! TORU rolls away clutching at his midsection as Hawke brings his last line of defence into play. The big man doesn’t intend to go down without a fight, but Hawke has no intention of letting him regain his breath as he follows up by scrambling over to where TORU is trying to recuperate on his hands and knees and poking him in the eyes! Landon still looks a little groggy so Hawke has to take matters into his own hands, and the battered Dean heads for the turnbuckles. “This is rather out of character for Jay Hawke,” LDP observes as the International Champion climbs to the second buckle, “he rarely strays from the mat unless he’s looking for the Hawke Swoop!” “This is what makes Hawke such a great wrestler,” King argues, “although he has a definite strength he is well-able to modify his game as needed!” Hawke has his sights set on TORU as the bigger man gets to his feet, and as he circles around looking for his opponent the Dean of Professional Wrestling leaps off the second buckle, flipping forward to snare Takahara around the head and take him over with a Blockbuster neckbreaker! *BANG!* “JAY HAWKE SUCKS!” “JAY HAWKE SUCKS!” Hawke climbs on top of TORU for the pin and hooks the leg, causing Blazenwing to drop to the mat… ONE! TWO!! …but TORU kicks out without the referee even having to engage in questionable counting! Hawke heaves a sigh and places TORU in a front facelock (with an apologetic look at Blazenwing) before towing the Japanese Hammer over to the Cucaracha Internacional corner where Landon now tags himself in. The Next Generation then climbs to the top rope before jumping off, landing a mushroom stomp into TORU’s back before landing on his feet and holding his arms out to the sides as he taunts KOJI! “BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” Landon reaches up to flip his hair… and his hair isn’t there anymore. La Cucaracha spends a moment of shock in trying to find it before he remembers that no, he’s actually cut most of it off… and on the apron KOJI is getting his revenge by giving Landon the finger and stroking his own luxuriant black locks! Maddix takes umbrage at that and turns around to boot TORU Takahara in the ribs before taking him off the hands of Jay Hawke. Landon turns his opponent around and takes him in a ¾ headlock, leading to Hawke starting to clap in anticipation of the snapmare that must surely follow and Landon’s steady progress towards crisp, proper wrestling moves… but Maddix simply kicks his feet out and hits TORU with the Snapmare Driver, causing Hawke to sigh and roll his eyes at his partner’s overly flashy offence. “MADD-IX SUCKS!” “MADD-IX SUCKS!” Landon rolls TORU onto his back and goes for the pin… but Blazenwing just looks at him and refuses to make the count, seemingly signalling that he wants Maddix to rough his opponent up some more! “King, I can’t believe what I’m seeing out here!” Longdogger Pete exclaims as Maddix gets back to his feet and begins demanding that Blazenwing ‘do his damn job’, “David Blazenwing is abusing all the trust that Joseph Peters put in him-” “Well, what does Peters expect from this tool?” King replies, looking up at the entrance ramp. “Besides, I think David’s replacement is on his way!” Sure enough, jogging down the ramp is the figure of SWF referee Brian Warner, who rolls under the ropes and heads over to Blazenwing. The newcomer’s visage is stern and he seems to be reprimanding Blazenwing for bringing shame to his shirt, or badge, or something. Meanwhile Maddix is taking his chance to choke TORU out using his bandana… and as he does so, Warner finally seems to persuade Blazenwing that it’s out of his hands now. The dejected former SJL star turns and heads for the ropes and Warner turns around to see La Cucaracha choking away, and begins his count! ‘ONE!’ ‘TWO!’ ‘THREE!’ ‘FOUR!’ ‘FI-’ -but Warner is interrupted by a hand on the shoulder that spins him around, and then by a boot to the chin! *CRACK!* “FULL EFFECT!” Pete roars as Blazenwing floors Warner with a super kick, “David Blazenwing just took out another SWF official! He’s lost his mind!” The crowd are cheering on general principle, but as Blazenwing rolls the body of the groggy referee under the bottom rope he glances up at the entrance ramp and signals at Maddix to hurry things up a little. With the realisation that tonight’s fluid rules could be about to be clamped down on Landon brings TORU up to his feet as quickly as he can, then wraps one arm across his opponent’s chest and falls backwards, driving his head into the mat with the Complete Shot! Maddix then turns TORU over… ONE! TWO!! THHHH- -and Blazenwing counts the first proper-speed count of the match, but TORU just manages to get his shoulder off the mat! Landon boots him in the head, but then gets up and moves over to tag Jay Hawke in. Hawke also seems to feel the urgency and starts to scale the ring post from the apron, getting to the top rope before leaping off with his head aimed directly at TORU’s shoulder! *BANG!* It connects, and the Japanese Hammer winces in pain as the Dean strikes home; TORU rolls onto his front, but Hawke figures he might as well give it a try and applies a hammerlock to the injured arm before rolling TORU onto his back for another pin attempt! ONE! TWO!! THHHHHHHHHHHHHHHRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR-NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! TORU squirms his shoulder off the mat and tries to rise, but Hawke hangs onto him and follows him up, now looking for the Crossface Chickenwing known as the Wing Span! It is at this moment that Joseph Peters apparently sends in backup, as Ced Ordonez appears out of the locker room and hurtles down towards the ring! The Bemani Cross Wizard slides in under the bottom rope and pops upright- *CRACK!* -only to be sent back over the top rope by another Full Effect from Blazenwing! As he is distracted TORU acts… *CHING!* …and mule kicks Hawke in the balls, just like he did in their singles match, to break the Wing Span! Hawke doubles over in pain and TORU turns around, then double underhooks him before hoisting him up off the canvas… …flipping him over in midair… …and bringing him down with the TIGER DRIVER~! *BANG!* The cover is instantaneous and Blazenwing is paying attention now… ONE! TWO!! THHHHHHHHHHHHRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR- -BROKEN UP BY A MADDIX SHINING WIZARD! *CRACK!* “BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” Maddix leans down to yell at Hawke and tell the Dean of Professional Wrestling to get up and get moving, but he is suddenly distracted as KOJI leaps off the top buckle and takes La Cucaracha down with a diving swinging neckbreaker! Landon rolls away clutching his neck in pain and now it is KOJI who bends down and slaps TORU in the face a couple of times to wake him up. The big man responds groggily and KOJI picks Hawke up, then places his opponent in a front facelock before hoisting him up and dropping him on his skull with a BRAINBUSTA~, then rolling TORU on top for the pin! ONE! TWO!! THHHHHHHHHHHHRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR-NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! “THAT WAS THREE!” “THAT WAS THREE!” “He kicked out!” LDP shouts above the roar of the crowd, “Jay Hawke isn’t done yet, no matter what the wishes of the fans here tonight may be!” TKO have other ideas though; KOJI almost drags TORU to his feet, then the two men bring Hawke up as well. As TORU bends down to place his head between the woozy Hawke’s legs KOJI hits a basement dropkick on Landon, sending La Cucaracha under the bottom rope and out to the arena floor. Kitano then hurries back to his corner and steps through the ropes, reaching out to tag TORU who has hoisted Jay Hawke up into an electric chair position and is ponderously wobbling around the ring. KOJI quickly ascends to the top buckle and leaps off… “Card’s mugging Landon on the outside!” King yells, before adding “go on you limey bastard, get him!” …and KOJI Kitano lands astride Jay Hawke, then spins around and flips backwards, TAKING HAWKE OFF TORU’S SHOULDERS AND SPIKING HIM ON HIS HEAD WITH A REVERSE HURRICANRANA!! “TKO SPIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIKEUH!” Pete roars, caught up in the drama of the moment. “That’s the move that pinned Wildchild and ended Wild & Dangerous!” KOJI hurriedly rolls Jay Hawke over as TORU collapses to his knees, still feeling the effects of the Shining Wizard, and Card tries not to be too obvious as he chokes Landon on the outside… ONE! TWO!! THHHHHHHHHHRRRRRRRRRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!! *DING-DING-DING!* “YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!” “Ladies and gentlemen, here are your winners,” Funyon booms as the locker room discharges more referees and Blazenwing makes a run for it, “TEE! KAY! OHH!” TORU and KOJI roll out of the ring, where they are joined by Natasha and a rather rumpled Card, then handed their tag belts. The duo raise them in triumph as they head back up the ramp and we FADE OUT Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Justice 0 Report post Posted December 1, 2005 We cut to the backstage area, where Max King and Kelly Connelly are standing. "You sure about this Max? I mean, it's a big opportunity for you, and there's a chance..." Max puts a hand on his manager's shoulder. "I'm sure babe. This is for the best and you know it." Kelly nods, and turns to the camera. "All right then, for those of you watching this, we have an announcement to make. As you all should know, recently Max King and Bruce Blank won a match to become the number one contenders for the Tag Team Championship. However, not only did King not really care about the match in the first place, he was given a partner with blatant disregard for rules and morals." "You see..." King continues. "I know I myself don't have a shining past, but I never tried to take someone out of a match without even fighting them. And I also paid attention to my teammates. Blank, you don't wanna play by the rules? Fine, then you're going to pay." Kelly takes a deep breath, as if she doesn't really feel good about making the announcement that she's about to make. "So, we went to the SWF board of directors, and we tried to forfeit our shot at the tag team titles, on behalf of our team. That didn't work, but they gave us the next best thing." King nods, looking into the camera. "Blank, you don't want to play by the rules? Fine, then the rules have changed thusly: at the next show, if you still want a shot at the tag team titles, you're going to have to face me. And the WINNER of the match will get a shot at the Tag Team titles, AND get a partner of his choice to face. The loser...will get nothing. Now since this is Lockdown, and is a family show, I won't say what I REALLY think about you and what I want to say, but suffice it to say, at Smarkdown...things are going to get ugly." The camera fades out as Kelly goes close to Max. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Justice 0 Report post Posted December 1, 2005 (edited) FADE IN “Welcome back to Lockdown, ladies and gentlemen,” says Longdogger Pete, fumbling with his tie, “where we keep it family friendly!” “I can’t believe that they made you put that thing on,” laughs the Suicide King, referring to Lockdown’s new family-friendly dress code for the announce team. “I’ve got two questions for you, Drain-Clogger: how many trainees did it take to squeeze you into that thing, since you haven’t exactly hit the gym much since you retired? And, did they donate that god-awful print shirt you wore in tonight to the Salvation Army?” “Anyway,” says Pete, deliberately ignoring him, “it’s just about time for our main event of the evening! And King, earlier this month, at Ashes 2 Ashes, Todd Cortez and the Wildchild teamed up to take on the team of Marcus Ward and Johnny Dangerous. But, these two have been bitter rivals for a long time, and now they’ll actually get to face each other in a one-on-one matchup!” “You could tell a few weeks ago on Pay Per View that those two were not happy about having to team with each other,” adds King, “so I don’t doubt for a second that they’re going to be at each other’s throats here tonight!” “Which can only mean that our fans here in Toronto will be the big winners tonight!” exclaims Pete. “Let’s face it, King, you’re looking at two of the top superstars in the SWF: they’ve got seven Tag Team Title reigns between them, and both have also had impressive runs with the Hardcore Title!” “Well, they’re definitely evenly matched,” agrees King. “But the newer, more stringent ‘family-friendly’ rules will put a different spin on this match!” “Obviously the new rules put an emphasis on mat wrestling,” adds Pete, “but which wrestler do you think that favors the most?” King shakes his head and sighs heavily before he responds. “You know, I never thought these words would ever come out of my mouth, especially not in this exact order… but I actually think that Wildchild is going to have a slight advantage in mat wrestling in this match.” Pete, who had been taking a sip of water, abruptly spits it all over the announce table. “What? I’m sorry, I meant… what?” “Look,” starts King, “it was hard enough to say the first time; don’t make me have to repeat myself!” “Well, as improbable as it is to hear coming from your lips,” chuckles LDP, “you do have a point, King. After all, Todd Cortez is more of a street fighter, and in the Hardcore environment of Storm, or in the more traditional, catch-as-catch-can environment of Smarkdown, Todd’s strength and street fighting experience might give him the advantage. But, in a match like this, with so many restrictions to the wrestlers’ respective fighting styles, I have to believe that Wildchild’s slightly-more extensive mat wrestling background give him the advantage.” “And, let’s not forget about the special guest referee,” adds King. “Todd Cortez is going to face El Luchadore Magnifico at our next Pay Per View for the World Heavyweight Championship, and this will be Mags’ first chance to see his competition up close!” “And I’d be wary of any kind of shenanigans on the part of the Champion,” says LDP. “He’s definitely not above interjecting himself in the match.” “Well, who’s going to tell him that he can’t?” challenges King. “He’s the Champion!” “And, on that note,” continues Pete, “it’s time to send it up to Funyon for the ring introductions!” DING! DING! DING! The camera shifts to Funyon in the center of the ring, who raises the microphone to his lips. “Ladies and gentlemen, it is now time… for the Main Event!” RAAAAAAAAAAH! The fans in the Air Canada Center begin to cheer wildly at the announcement, only to quickly begin booing again as “Tu Final” by Atake FDD begins to play. Mags is wearing a sarcastic grin on his face as he steps out from behind the curtain, brandishing his Championship belt over his striped referee’s shirt. “Please welcome, at this time, the special guest referee for this match,” continues Funyon, “the SWF World Heavyweight Champion… EL LUUUUUCHADORE MAAAAAGNIFICO!” “Mags not getting a very positive reaction from the fans here in Toronto,” notes LDP. “Mags doesn’t need to a have positive fan reaction,” says King dismissively. “He’s already the World Heavyweight Champion; what could the fans possibly do for him?” ELM proudly displays his belt before reluctantly handing it to a ring attendant out on the arena floor. Suddenly, “Tu Final” is replaced by the smooth g-funk beat of Mos Def’s “Oh No.” The Air Canada Center comes alive once again as the Urban Legend steps through the bursts of pyro out onto the stage, hand-in-hand with the lovely Megan Skye. “Making his way to the ring at this time,” booms Funyon, “being accompanied by Megan Skye… from Hollywood Boulevard and weighing in at two hundred twenty-six pounds, here is the Urban Legend… TODD CORTEZ!” “And there’s a man who IS feeling the love of the crowd, King!” shouts Pete, as Cortez climbs into the ring. “Well, he might as well,” replies King, as Todd continues with his pre-match routine. “It’s not like he has anything else going for him!” Todd removes his chain and hands it through the ropes down Megan. Todd then heads over to the corner and finishes stretching as his music fades out, only to be replaced by Mystikal’s “Bouncin’ Back.” The fans continue to cheer as Wildchild steps out onto the stage. “His opponent,” continues Funyon, “is being accompanied to the ring by Melissa Fasaki! From the Bahamas and weighing in at two hundred fourteen pounds… the WIIIIILDCHIIIIILD!” “This should be a tremendous match between two fan favorites!” exclaims Pete, as Wildchild and Melissa continue down the ramp. WC somersaults into the ring and pops to his feet, running towards the edge of the ring and leaping onto the middle rope as the fans cheer for him: DUB-CEE! DUB-CEE! DUB-CEE! DUB-CEE! “It’ll be interesting to see if Mags shows any kind of bias in this match, King,” Pete wonders aloud. “He’s obviously been at odds with both men recently.” “Well, he’s already beaten Wildchild, so I doubt that he feels any kind of threat from him,” replies King. “Come to think of it, I don’t think that Mags feels threatened by Cortez, either, but he may feel more inclined to want to, shall we say, get his attention?” Wildchild removes his shin guards and hands them through the ropes to the ring attendant before turning back towards the center of the ring to face his opponent. “We should be just about ready for the start of this match,” says Pete, as Wildchild’s music fades out, “but neither man seems to be willing to want to shake hands to get things going!” Both WC and Todd continue to stare at each other coldly, their long rivalry making them reluctant to want to show each other sportsmanship. “Well, they’d better get the lead out, before Mags decides to take action!” After several seconds of waiting, ELM orders both men to shake hands and, when neither man moves, he begins to deliver a five-count: ONE! “And I don’t think that it’d hurt Mags’ feelings one bit to disqualify both of them!” quips King. TWO! THREE! “Is this really happening?” asks Pete incredulously. “Would they really risk depriving the fans of a Main Event match to spite each other?” FOUR! FI— And finally, just before ELM can finish saying “five,” Wildchild and Todd give each other a half-hearted handshake, only to withdraw their hands as quickly as they’d made contact. With a smirk on his face, Mags turns to the timekeeper and signals him to ring the bell, signifying the start of the match: DING! DING! DING! “Finally!” sighs LDP. “It’s time to get down to bid’ness!” Wildchild and Cortez meet in the center of the ring for a collar-and-elbow tie-up, and quickly push each other away. They lock up a second time, and WC immediately snaps Todd over with a lightning-fast armdrag! Cortez scrambles back to his feet, only to be taken over with another armdrag! After a third such armdrag takeover, Todd remains on the canvas for a few seconds, slow to return to his feet. “Well, this match has gotten off to a pretty fast start,” notes Pete, “and so far, it looks like Wildchild does indeed have the advantage, just like you said, King!” “Definitely,” adds King. “Cortez needs to try and get Wildchild down on the mat, if he can, and use that little bit of weight advantage that he has to keep him down there, and neutralize his speed advantage.” Todd and WC lock up yet again, and the Urban Legend takes advantage with an armbar, which Wildchild somersaults out of to escape, and then counters with an arm wringer of his own, turning his body in towards Todd and taking him over with yet another armdrag before he can react! “Cortez is definitely going to have to take Wildchild down, because it doesn’t look like he can top wrestle him,” says LDP. WC beats Todd to his feet and stuns him with a boot to the midsection. He then grabs him by the wrist and whips him across the ring, but the Urban Legend reverses easily and sends Wildchild into the ropes, tripping him as he rebounds with a drop toehold. “That’s a good move to get him down on the mat,” notes King. Cortez applies a rear waistlock and pulls WC into referee’s position, but the Bahama Bomber quickly sits out. He grabs Todd’s left forearm with both hands and wrenches it sharply to escape the waistlock, and then counters into a hammerlock! “This has been some good, basic wrestling by both men to start this match,” says Pete, as Wildchild rises up to deliver some kneedrops into Todd’s shoulder blade. “But you have to wonder how long it’s going to be before these two take it to their more traditional technique?” “Well, neither man has the technical background to actually wrestle a whole match,” replies King. “Obviously, I believe that Wildchild is the sounder wrestler of the two, but he’s still not going to be able to keep this up for more than a few minutes!” Wildchild maintains control of the hammerlock as Cortez returns to a sitting position, and continues to hold onto it as the Urban Legend slowly negotiates his way to his feet. LET’S GO, WILD-CHILD! (LET’S GO, CORTEZ!) LET’S GO, WILD-CHILD! (LET’S GO, CORTEZ!) LET’S GO, WILD-CHILD! (LET’S GO, CORTEZ!) LET’S GO, WILD-CHILD! (LET’S GO, CORTEZ!) “The crowd seems to be pretty much split down the middle,” notes Pete, acknowledging the dueling chants. Todd reaches back to grab WC by the back of the head and uses it to pull himself back to his feet, earning a warning from ELM. “Todd Cortez has managed to get back to his feet,” says King, “but he was dangerously close to getting disqualified there!” “What are you talking about, King?” LDP asks incredulously. “The rules state that headlocks are outlawed, but that was hardly a headlock!” “Maybe not,” counters King, “but you have to keep in mind who’s officiating tonight!” “… I stand corrected.” Once back to his feet, Todd tries to take WC over with a snapmare, but can’t get the leverage. He then tries to reach between his legs and trip Wildchild up that way, but the Caribbean Cruiser keeps reversing on him, shifting his legs around to keep Todd from grabbing hold. Finally, Todd tries to twist his way out of the hammerlock, forcing WC to overcompensate in order to keep up with him. Cortez then tricks him by suddenly stepping into his body to escape the hammerlock, and reverses it into a top wristlock! “Excellent counter by Todd Cortez to escape the hammerlock!” praises LDP. “He may not be as unfamiliar with wrestling holds as you originally thought, King!” “Eh,” says King with a shrug, “he probably learned that on the streets.” “Sure,” replies Pete jokingly. “I’m sure a technical wrestling exhibition breaks out at every street fight!” “…” Back inside the ring, Todd stuns WC with two consecutive knees to the midsection, and then tries to muscle Wildchild backwards to the canvas, but the Tropical Tumbler resists with everything he has, bending backwards into a bridge in order to avoid a possible pinning predicament. “Excellent bridge by Wildchild,” says Pete. “I tell you what, King, this match has already shown more technical wrestling knowledge by both men than I would have given them credit for!” “Well, if these new family-friendly rules are going to lead to more actual wrestling, then I’m definitely in favor of it,” replies King. “Anything that results in less garbage wrestling by guys like Wildchild and Todd Cortez is a good thing!” Todd delivers a couple of headbutts to the midsection that knocks WC flat against the canvas, and causes ELM to deliver his first three-count of the match: ONE! TW— Wildchild quickly bridges back up at two. Mags begins to taunt Cortez over not being able to put away his opponent, and Wildchild takes advantage of his distracted state to begin to power his way back to his feet. LET’S GO, WILD-CHILD! (LET’S GO, CORTEZ!) LET’S GO, WILD-CHILD! (LET’S GO, CORTEZ!) LET’S GO, WILD-CHILD! (LET’S GO, CORTEZ!) LET’S GO, WILD-CHILD! (LET’S GO, CORTEZ!) “Surprising show of strength by the Wildchild here,” says King. “And I can’t say enough how surprised I am by how well he’s been wrestling!” Wildchild manages to fight his way back to a vertical base but Cortez, his focus restored, begins to muscle him back down again. The Human Hurricane has other plans, however, as he quickly swings his legs up off the canvas and wraps them around Todd’s neck, taking Cortez over before he can react with a sensational headscissors! Todd scrambles back to his feet and charges WC, only to be taken through the air with a hiptoss! Wildchild then leaps into the air and blasts Cortez in the chest with a dropkick that sends him falling through the ropes and out to the floor! “Looks like I spoke too soon,” grumbles King, as Wildchild scrambles to his feet. ELM admonishes him for knocking Cortez out of the ring, but the Bahama Bomber brushes him aside. “That’s a violation!” exclaims King. “Wildchild should be disqualified!” “Perhaps,” replies Pete, “but it looks like Mags is going to allow it; maybe he wants Wildchild to soften up Cortez for him!” “Well, if that’s the case… carry on.” Wildchild charges across the ring as Todd picks himself up off the floor, and jams both feet into his chest, knocking him back against the ring barricade with a baseball slide! WC looks out of the ring to see that Cortez has turned to lean his chest against the barricade, and knows immediately what he wants to do next. “Uh-oh!” shouts Pete. “I’ve seen that look in his eyes before!” “Unfortunately, so have I,” groans King. “And the match was coming along so nicely until now!” Wildchild runs to the ropes, picking up speed as he rebounds, and leaps over the top rope, flipping as he sails out of the ring, and crashes into Todd’s back with a flying somersault senton, crushing his chest against the hard rubber barricade! DUB-CEE! DUB-CEE! DUB-CEE! DUB-CEE! “Well, King, it didn’t take long for Wildchild to find away around the top rope rule,” notes LDP. “I mean, you can’t be disqualified for going to the top rope if you don’t even touch the top rope, can you?” “It’s just a shame that he feels like he has to do all of that garbage,” laments King. “That’s why he was the weak link of Wild and Dangerous; he always has to go for some kind of flash, and it always got his team into trouble!” Wildchild pulls Cortez away from the barricade, only to trap him in a front waistlock and ram him into the edge of the ring apron, driving his shoulder into Todd’s ribcage. “Wildchild certainly seems to be focusing a large part of his attack on Todd’s ribcage,” observes Pete. “Now, that should be disqualifiable under the family-friendly rules; I wonder why Mags isn’t calling him on it?” “Why do you think he’s not calling him on it?” replies King. “He wants Wildchild to handle his light work for him… look at the smile on his face while Cortez is getting pummeled? He’s not even attempting to deliver a countout!” Wildchild rolls Todd back into the ring and then climbs onto the ring apron. He grabs onto the top rope and slings himself into the ring, crashing into Todd’s chest with a slingshot senton splash, and rolling over to apply a cover as ELM drops down to count: ONE! TWO! THR— Cortez kicks out at two! WC pulls him to his feet and traps him in a front facelock, before lifting him up and spinning him around, dropping him back down with a corkscrew vertical suplex! He then stands with his back to Cortez, flipping backwards to crash into his chest with a backflip splash! Before Mags can start making the count, WC hops back to his feet and races to the nearby corner, hopping onto the bottom ropes and immediately springing back off, crashing into Todd with a bottom-rope moonsault! The Human Hurricane gets right back up and runs back to the corner, leaping onto the middle ropes and then flipping back to hit Cortez with a second-rope moonsault! ONE! TWO! THRE— Cortez kicks out at two again! “Boy, was that close!” sighs LDP. “Wildchild appears to be cruising right now, but give credit to Todd Cortez for withstanding his attack!” WC pulls Cortez to his feet and whips him towards a neutral corner, but the Urban Legend reverses, racing to the ropes as Wildchild bounces off the turnbuckles… WHAM! … And nailing him with the Hollow Point! Wildchild falls flat on his back, while Todd crumples to his knees to recover! “Whoa!” shouts Pete. “Hollow Point out of nowhere! That ought to buy Cortez some time!” Todd crawls over to Wildchild and makes a half-hearted pin attempt: ONE! TWO! THR— Wildchild kicks out at two! Cortez wearily gets back to his feet and attempts to pull WC up, only for the Bahama Bomber to slap his hands away and blast him with a vicious knife-edge chop to the chest, followed by a second and a third! Wildchild grabs Cortez by the wrist and attempts to whip him across the ring, only for the Urban Legend to reverse it. Todd thrusts his foot forward to nail WC with a Superkick as he bounces off the ropes, but hesitates as he remembers at the last second about blows to the face being outlawed, allowing the Bahama Bomber enough reaction time to catch his foot… CRACK! … But Todd improvises beautifully, springing off the canvas with his other leg and knocking Wildchild senseless with an Enzugiri! “Big time counter by Todd Cortez!” shouts Pete. “That should definitely turn the tide!” Todd crawls over to WC and hooks the leg as ELM begins his count: ONE! TWO! TH— Wildchild kicks out at two! Cortez pulls WC to his feet and blasts him repeatedly in the midsection with a series of stiff front kicks, before spinning around and knocking him to the mat with a jumping back kick! The Urban Legend then heads over to the nearby corner and lifts himself up to the middle ropes, measuring Wildchild as he leaps off and crashes down across his opponent’s throat with a second-rope legdrop. “Cortez measured Wildchild for that legdrop,” recalls Pete, “and now he’s got him dead to rights… but, why isn’t Mags counting the pinfall?” “He’s admonishing Todd Cortez,” replies King. “Apparently, he thought that legdrop was a little closer to the face than it should have been!” “Oh come on, King!” complains LDP, as Cortez scrambles to his feet to argue with ELM. “Mags has been wrestling for years; do you really expect me to believe that he can’t tell when a legdrop is hitting the neck or the face? I think that he’s doing it on purpose just to mess with Todd Cortez!” “Well, I suppose that’s possible,” replies King, “but what is Cortez going to do about it? What, is he going to put his hands on Mags and risk disqualification?” Todd turns his attention back to WC and lifts him up off the canvas to deliver a Scoop Slam, but the Caribbean Cruiser hooks his arms and legs around Cortez and pulls him down into an inside cradle! ONE! TWO! TH— Wildchild gets two, but can’t hold Cortez down for a three count! He beats the Urban Legend to his feet and continues to keep him off balance with a battery of double chops to the trapezius, before grabbing him by the wrist and whipping him into the ropes. WC leaps into the air as Todd rebounds, but Cortez catches him in mid air and jams him down onto his outstretched thigh with an inverted atomic drop! “Crotch-Droppah to Wildchild!” shouts Pete. “And a modified STO takes him down to the canvas!” Todd floats over to attempt a pinfall: ONE! TWO! THR— Wildchild kicks out at two! Cortez immediately applies another lateral press: ONE! TWO! THRE— … But Wildchild kicks out once more, just short of the three-count! “Give credit to Wildchild for being able to continue to kick out of those pin attempts,” says Pete. “At the same time, that’s also good strategy on the part of Cortez to keep going after those pinfall attempts,” adds King. “The more that Wildchild has to keep kicking out, the more energy he’s going to expend, so he’s wearing his opponent out while also buying himself a little more recovery time!” Wildchild tries to get back to his feet, but Todd is there to greet him, and nails him with a ferocious European uppercut that knocks WC flat on his BUTT! While his opponent attempts to clear the cobwebs, Todd runs to the nearby corner, pulling himself up to the middle ropes and then immediately jumping back into the ring, blasting WC in the chest with a front dropkick! “Missile Dropkick from the second rope!” shrieks LDP, as Cortez scrambles over to apply the cover. “That’s going to do it!” ONE! TWO! THREE! “No!” shouts Pete. “Wildchild got his foot on the ropes!” “Lucky for him,” snorts King derisively. “I don’t think there was any way he was going to kick out of that missile dropkick!” Cortez rolls WC onto his stomach and begins to pull him back up to his feet, but the Bahama Bomber stuns him with a surprising headbutt to the midsection! He follows up with rights and lefts to the tender area, and attempts to move up to Todd’s bruised ribs, but the Urban Legend stops him cold with a double-axe handle blow to the back of the head. “Wildchild trying to mount a comeback here,” observes King, “but he may not have enough left!” Cortez pulls WC to his feet and whips him towards the edge of the ring, but the Human Hurricane leaps onto the middle ropes and immediately springs off, flipping backwards over Todd’s head and trapping the Urban Legend in an inverted front facelock as he lands behind him, and then falls backwards towards the canvas before Cortez can react… WHAM! … Spiking the back of Todd’s head into the canvas with a reverse DDT! “What a tremendous counter by Wildchild!” cries Pete. “A springboard into the reverse DDT! Could the momentum be turning back to Wildchild’s favor?” “I don’t know,” replies King, “but I wouldn’t bet on it! Todd Cortez was able to get a good amount of punishment in, and Wildchild isn’t exactly known for being the most durable person in the world!” ELM looks at both men lying motionless in the ring, and begins to deliver a ten-count: “ONE!” “TWO!” “THREE!” “FOUR!” “FIVE!” “SIX!” “SEVEN!” “EIGH… Ah, screw it!” With that, ELM suddenly, and unexpectedly, exits the ring, heading over to the timekeeper’s table and shoving the timekeeper out of his chair, folding it up and taking it into the ring with him. “What in the world?” Pete wonders aloud. “Where does Mags think he’s going with that chair?” “Wherever he wants, MacDougal,” replies King. “The big question is who’s going to stop him?” ELM climbs back into the ring, chair in hand, and walks over to Todd Cortez. He then sneers at the crowd before raising the chair high above his head. “Oh no!” screams LDP. “He’s going to hit Todd Cortez with the chair! He’s going to try and debilitate his next challenger before the match even happens!” “You have to give credit to Mags for this strategy!” says King. “Let two of your biggest rivals beat each other’s brains out, and then, when the time is right, put your next challenger out of commission!” Before ELM can swing the chair, however, WC rises up off the ground to stop him, grabbing the chair and snatching it out of his hands! The World Champion gets in Wildchild’s face and warns him to stay out of his business, but the Bahama Bomber shoves Mags in response! RAAAAAAAAAAH! “He put his hands on the referee!” roars King. “That’s a disqualification! He should be fined and suspended as well!” “That may be the case, King,” replies LDP, “but I don’t think that Mags actually wants to award the match to Todd Cortez, either!” CHING! Rather than issue a ruling, ELM drives a foot into WC’s nether regions, doubling him over in pain! He picks the chair back up and raises it overhead to nail Wildchild, but this time, the Urban Legend pulls the chair away from him! RAAAAAAAAAAH! “I don’t know what these two are thinking,” says King, “but they’re tempting fate by stopping Mags from doing what he’s doing; if they keep it up, he’s going to end up disqualifying one of them!” “What do you expect them to do?” asks LDP in response. “Mags is trying to hit them with a chair; are they supposed to just stand there and let him do it?” “Let me see,” replies King. “The referee is trying to hit your opponent with a chair... You know you’re not going to get disqualified for it, because it’s the referee… Don’t be an idiot, MacDougal; OF COURSE you stand there and let him do it, and then you take the easy win!” “Well, fortunately for the fans, Wildchild and Todd Cortez have a little more integrity than you!” replies Pete. By now, ELM is furious, berating both men for having the temerity to stop him from going wild with a chair. WC and Todd look at each other briefly, and then turn towards Mags… CRACK! … AND DRILL HIM IN THE FACE WITH A DOUBLE SUPERKICK THAT SENDS HIM FLYING OUT OF THE RING! YEEEEEEEEEEAH! “Holy cow!” shrieks Pete. “Todd Cortez and Wildchild just nailed Mags with a double Superkick!” “And they just sealed their fates!” adds King, as ELM stumbles around the arena floor, back over to the timekeepers table. He snatches the microphone away from Funyon, and then returns to the ring. “Real cute, vatos!” growls Mags as he massages his chin. “You gringos think you’re so smart, eh? Well, we’ll see how smart you think you are when I rule that you’re BOTH disqualified! Ring the bell, esse!” DING! DING! DING! “Well, that’s it,” says Pete nonchalantly. “El Luchadore Magnifico has disqualified both Wildchild and Todd Cortez!” “And that’s the least that they should have coming to them!” snipes King. “They should both be looking at some heavy fines, and possibly suspension!” “I tell you what, though, King,” adds LDP. “For someone who just got disqualified, Todd Cortez doesn’t look all that upset!” Indeed, the Urban Legend is wearing a sarcastic grin on his face as he walks across the ring, and the crowd cheers as he snatches the microphone from ELM’s hand. “Double disqualification, huh?” he asks. “That’s cool, Mags… Well, since the match is over, then… I’m sure you won’t mind if I do… this!” DINK! ELM falls to the canvas as Todd waffles him in the head with the microphone! Wildchild helps Cortez pull Mags to his feet and they both whip him across the ring, only to nail him with a double dropkick that sends him out of the ring as he bounces off the ropes! RAAAAAAAAAAH! “This is assault!” roars King. “This is a two-on-one assault! Wildchild and Cortez should both be taken downtown and put in a cell!” Wildchild takes a step back and leaves ELM at the mercy of Todd Cortez, who grabs onto the top rope and flings himself out of the ring as the World Heavyweight Champion is just beginning to pull himself to his feet, crashing into him with a plancha! WC watches with glee as Todd fights ELM all the way back to the dressing room. “What a surprising turn of events here tonight,” says Pete. “We just might be looking at a preview of our next Pay Per View, when Mags will put the Heavyweight Championship on the line against Todd Cortez, and… WAIT A MINUTE!” Wildchild is so engrossed in the brawling heading up the ramp that he fails to notice that Johnny Dangerous has snuck into the ring behind him! “Wildchild!” pleads LDP. “Turn around!” But, it’s too late, as Johnny spins WC around and quickly shoots into a fireman’s carry, lifting WC up overhead… WHAM! … And driving him back down into the canvas with an MI Slam! “Oh my goodness!” cries Pete. “Johnny Dangerous comes in out of nowhere, and knocks Wildchild out with that vicious MI Slam!” Johnny pops back to his feet and makes a beckoning gesture towards someone in the crowd. As he exits the ring to the arena floor, the camera pans the crowd to see a large man in a mask lumbering through the fans. “It’s Villano 13!” exclaims King. “What’s he doing coming down to the ring?” “Will you be serious?” asks Pete. “You know perfectly well that that’s not Villano 13; that’s Bruce Blank in a mask! Everybody can see that!” “Are you sure?” asks King. “He looks an awful lot like a Galavision reject!” Johnny slides a table into the ring and sets it up as “Villano 13” is climbing over the barricade. Once he enters the ring, Johnny orders the “Villano” to soften him up some more, and “Villano” complies, stomping on WC’s right shoulder, then in a swift motion jumps forward a little and stomps on his right arm, then the right side of the chest, then the right thigh… “Is that enough proof for you?” demands Pete. “He’s doing the Trailer Park Tornado!” “That doesn’t prove anything,” replies King sarcastically. “For all we know, that could be Ronnie Garvin under that mask!” “Oh, please!” “Villano 13” completes the Trailer Park Tornado and then lifts WC up and places him on the table, as Johnny climbs up to the top turnbuckle… CRASH! … And flips backwards off the top, driving both feet into WC’s chest, as he sends him through the table with a moonsault double stomp! “Death From Above!” cries Pete. “Death From Above through a damned table; this is too much!” Johnny rises to his feet and looks out into the crowd, smiling with pride over what he’s just done. JOHN-NY SUCKS! JOHN-NY SUCKS! JOHN-NY SUCKS! JOHN-NY SUCKS! JOHN-NY SUCKS! “What a reprehensible action by someone who used to call Wildchild a friend!” cries LDP. “Someone’s got to put a stop to Johnny’s carnage!” “Villano 13” holds Johnny’s hand aloft in a mock victory pose, and Johnny stands in triumph over the broken body of his former partner… As we: FADE OUT ===== SWF Lockdown © 2005 – Rule of Law Productions The SWF: “Raising Workrate by Typing Faster” Edited December 1, 2005 by Justice Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
