Murmuring Beast 0 Report post Posted June 12, 2006 I can't believe this was 3 years ago. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
k thx 0 Report post Posted June 12, 2006 CHAPTER 10 :::Choken and The Gang Drive along the empty highway of Canada::: Choken: Those fuckers are getting pretty damn irritating CWM: Well if SOME ONE WASN'T stupid enough to leave them a fucking letter we wouldnt have to worry about them. Chosun(naked): Look I am sorry...can I at LEAST have a fucking sock to wear... Zack: Sorry we don't wear any Baby Socks here pal :::C.C in the trunck Giggles::: Choken: HEY! Where did the guy go? Billy or whatever... CWM: You mean, Bob Barron? Choken: Yeah CWM: We left him back at the first hotel... :::Meanwhile...AngleSault FINALLY comes too::: Anglesault: What the hell happened? Choken? CWM? Chosun? You won't believe this dream I had...Wait...This isn't my bed and this isn't my Aerosmith Wallpaper...WHERE AM I? :::Looks outside and reads "CANADA-BRET HART'S HOME TOWN::: AngleSault: How the hell did I wind Up here? and whose house is this... :::A.S looks around::: A.S: Ah Look a Computer...Oh My God! THEY KIDNAPPED C.C AND BARRON AND ANGLESAULT! Wait..I'm still here and they aren't...does that mean? THEY FUCKING LEFT ME! :::reads more::: AS: What? U mean Caboose and Chave and Fook and AM didn't even wake me up? Sweet Jesus! That's I'm leaving... :::Stomps up the stairs but door swings wide open and knocks him back down the stairs:: Dames: Here we go...Excuse me AS. :::Steps Over AngleSault's Bleeding body::: Dames: Damn it...We missed them... ------------- ::Mario Logan arrives at the hotel:: Mario: Canadian Chick. *sniff* I can still smell her. The scent is getting stronger. I am getting closer to her. :: Mario enters the hotelto look for signs of where they went, only to find Fooks prone, headless and (more pertinently) dead body at the foot of the stairs:: Mario: Fook, my one true friend. What happened? Who did this to you? I will return you to life. ::Mario whips out the freshly decapitated tramps head he had found on the side of the road and, foruitously, brought with him:: ::Several hours later, Mario surveys his work. Fook stands before him, with new tramps head dangerously perched atop his shoulders, stuck on with masking tape:: Mario: So Fook, who did this to you? Fook: Urrrrrrrrr. chave. Mario: The B Team! Those bastards! So, our quest is clear. To get revenge on the B Team, and get sweet, sweet Canadian Chick. Fook: Urrrrrrrrr. sweet. Mario: Lets go, we can follow their tyre tracks. Fook: Urrrrrrrrr. tracks. ::Mario rushes off, leaving Fook, who doesn't follow, but keeps on looking into the distance with a blank look on his face. Finally, Mario returns and drags him off:: --------------------- :::Choken One Puts on River Runs Red Album::: CWM: Fuck That! ::::CWM puts in NeverMind Album::: Chosun: Fuck that! :::Chosun puts in Bob Seger:: Zack::Fuck That! :::Zack puts in Mandy Moore::: CWM+CHOKEN+CHOSUN: FUCK THAT! :::Choken turns on Radio Radio Dude: The temperture is a mild Negative 4 today in Canada, Bret Hart's Hometown. Today Headlines are, A Canadian Chick that does by the name of...Canadian Chick has been kidnapped by 4 Message Board Posters of the TheSmartmarks.com. A delerious Bob Barron gave testimony just recently Barron: THEY TIED ME UP TO A GIRL! OH THE HUMANITY! Radio: More on this as it develops... :::CWM turns radio off::: Choken: Ah Damn. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Art Sandusky 0 Report post Posted June 12, 2006 I think I feel bad for Chav. Now I know I do. C'MON WE'RE JUST TRYIN TO HAVE SOME FUN GUYS RELAX Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Annabelle 0 Report post Posted June 12, 2006 chave is a lame-o. his previous feeble attempts to be hip have easily been over shadowed by this. that, and his ignorant viewpoint on pornography. guy/girl porno is a gateway to kiddie porn. everyone write that one down? down with chave. doooown. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Art Sandusky 0 Report post Posted June 13, 2006 MAYBE HE CAN POST A PICTURE OF HIMSELF WITH LONG HAIR Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
k thx 0 Report post Posted June 13, 2006 CHAPTER 13 ::Chosun Murders the A-Team and controls the world::: :::Chosun wakes up from his dream with a glazed look on his face::: Choken: Good Nap Kid? Chosun: Yes. Choken: Good...We got word that The B Team is no more then 10 minutes behind us... Chosun: Yes. Choken: Does Chosun Sucks Barron's Pee wee? Chosun: Yes. CWM: Mmmm...Something is fishy... :::Zack emerges from the second bedroom::: :::C.C walks out with a distant look on her face::: :::Choken and CWM make a glance at each other::: ------------------------ ::The A Team get back into their car after their little piss break and drive aimlessly through the outskirts of Canada CIty:: Chosun: So, let me get this straight. We've kidnapped Canadian Chick, embarked on a trek through Canada, we're being chased by the B Team of Caboose, chave and AM, who are in turn being chased by Mario Logan and the recently dead corpse of Fook who he brought back to life by taping a tramps head to his body. And now the police are chasing us after Bob Barron tipped them off. Oh, and I'm still naked after losing to CWM at strip poker. Choken: Yeah. What's your point? Chosun: Oh, none really, I just wanted to do a quick recap. You know, for fun and stuff... ::They pass a sign saying "ON-TOPIC: NEXT LEFT":: CWM: Quick! That way! ::Meanwhile, a short way down the road:: chave: Finally, we are near the A-Team. We can see their smoke after hours of chasing them. Increase the B Team-mobile to maximum speed! AM: Er, you're driving dude. chave: Not in my head. Cabose: Ah fuck this ::Caboose heaves chave out of the driving seat and speeds after the A Team's car:: CWM: Shit, it's the dastardly B Team. Quick Choken, turn down that side alley. ::What follows is a high speed car chase through the narrow back streets of Canada. chave fires a pistol at the A Team car, and it nearly hits the wheels, but instead just breaks one of those little light things at the back of the car. The brake lights or something, I dunno. They continue the chase through a market place, overturn a maarket stall selling watermelons, and they drive through a pane of glass, which scares the hell out of CHOSUN and he cries like a little bitch until CWM slaps him. God, do you know how hard it is to write a car chase? Seriously, I mean, come on. It's an action scene, and you expect me to write it out in words or something? You know what happens anyway. Same as every James Bond film ever. It ends when the B Team spin out on a banana skin that CWM has left there, just like in Mario Kart. Shit, I bet no-ones even still reading this. I better put it in the dialogue to make sure. Oh yeah, and I rock. He he he:: Caboose: My God, we've spun out on a bannana skin, just like in the Mario Kart games. One can only presume that CWM, with his previously unknown but still dangerous addiction to bananas, is to blame. chave: 'kay ::Meanwhile in the A Team car:: Chosun: Dude, that banana was my only means of covering my modesty. I was gonna grow it till it was big enough to make it into a suit. CWM: Why didn't you just put on the spare set of clothes in the glove compartment? Chosun: There's a spare set of clothes in the glove compartment? Zach: Sure, we told you that before. We just thought you liked being naked. Canadian Chick: *giggles* Chosun: No-one told me! CWM: Sure they didn't... Chosun: NO-ONE T.. Choken: Quiet, you fool. We're approaching a hotel for the night. We can stay there and hide from the B Team. CWM: You mean like we did a few pages back? Choken: Yeah, only this time: BETTER. BWAHAHAHAH~! Chosun: Weirdo Choken: Screw you nude boy ::They enter the hotel:: Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
k thx 0 Report post Posted June 15, 2006 CHAPTER 14 *Ripper walks in* Ripper: Hey guys!! Its me, RIPPER!!! I am ready for some wacky adventure...where can I join in. *Everyone stares blankly at Ripper.* Ripper: It...its me...Ripper...remember...I run...I point at bears and stuff...I have like 4 or 5 running jokes that no one gets... RIPPER!! CWM: Ripper.... God damn it... *everyone continues to stare blankly* Ripper: What? I can offer stuff...remember the "runs" joke...that was classic right...r..right...Chave...you laughed...I think. Chave: Okay.... Ripper... Ripper: What? Chave: Alright...okay. Ripper: You know what...FINE. I'll start my own story with wacky adventures and none of you are invited. SO THERE!! CWM: Yeah thats great Ripper, look we got to get up kind of early soooooo... Chosen: We'll holla at you later..kay? Canadian Chick: Who the fuck are you? *Ripper leaves vowing revenge for this shunning* Ripper: I'll be back, damn you....I'll be back. ------------------------- :::It's Dark...With swirling snow breezing around the Calgary ground in Canada::: :::4 Men and a Young Lady are inside the confines of an Dodge avenger::: :::A few Miles beyond, 4 men are also in a Car...Driving a 95 buick century::: :::The avenger pulls into a diner::: :::The 4 men and the Lady enter the diner and take a seat in the far corner:: Chosun: God, I'm so hungry CWM: I know man...It's been like 2 days since we ate Choken: What looks good here? Zack: You look good... *Directed to C.C* C.C: *giggles* :::Choke and CWM catch a second take::: CHoken: So anyways...the Fried Chicken with Gravy looks good... Cwm: Nah...I'm getting the Mashed Potatoes and Steak. Chosun: I'll get the Turkey Club...with a chocolate milkshake Zack: So...You wanna Share? C.C: *giggles* Zack: All right me and her will split a Plate of Fries and a Strawberry Shake. ::::The team takes their orders::: :::As they eat their meal...The door chimes as four men walk into the diner and take a seat nearby the A-Team::: Caboose: I'm hungry. Chave: Me too... AM: In my day we used to eat at **** resturants like IHOP Mario: Ummm...Dudes...Look to your right... ::::The A-Team are enjoying dinner and having plesant convostation as Zack and C.C rub eachothers...Privite area" Caboose: What? AM: All right...Sure she's cute but Look at that Hunk... Mario: You dammed fools...That's the A-Team! Chave: I dunno...Hey...THEY ARE! Caboose: So what do we do? Mario: Eventully, The girl will have to go to the bathroom...So when she does...AM get up and grab her and we'll take her home and we'll be heros. :::CWM and Choken finish up their plates and excuse themselves to the restroom::: Mario: Just wait. :::Chosun reads the Local Paper in confusement::: Caboose: Why don't we just grab her? Mario: Not yet :::Zack gets up and softly kisses C.C's forehead and heads to the restroom::: Caboose: I say we go for it right now Chave: Yeah...The dude is distracted anyways :::Chosun continues reading::: Mario: Yeah...NOW! ::::AM and Caboose pop up and try to steal C.C::: C.C: *Giggles* Stop tickling me Zack...I'm tickleish Caboose: Yeah...I ani't Zack bitch... C.C: What? AM: C' Mon...we breaking you out! C.C: I don't wanna go! Caboose: Why not? C.C: I've fallen in love with Zack... Mario: Oh enough! ::Yanks C.C out of chair and runs with her::: :::B Team leave the diner::: Chosun: Can you hand me the salt? :::A moment of silence::: Chosun: Fine...I'll get it myself :::The other A-Teamers walk back to the table::: Choken: Hey...Where's CC? Chosun: Isn't she across the table? CWM: Uh No...Did she go to bathroom ZACK: WHERE IS SHE DAMN IT! Choken: DAMN IT! LOOK! The B team stole her! :::A-Team runs to car::: ---------------------------- :::as A-team runs to their car a figure sitting alone at the back of the diner lowers a menu that was covering his shadowy yet damn sexy face::: Ripper: Soon boys...soon... ::with a smirk he orders some chicken and gravy cause who doesn't love the gravey?:: Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Felonies! Report post Posted June 15, 2006 Chave is the Milton of TSM, and I am his Bill Lumbergh. We need to move him into the basement next. Maybe he'll get the idea. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Art Sandusky 0 Report post Posted June 15, 2006 That's what makes us so different. I would never quote Office Space Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Felonies! Report post Posted June 15, 2006 By "different," surely you mean "that's what makes me," referring to you, "inferior to you," referring to me. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Hotbutter Spoontoaster Report post Posted June 15, 2006 "I" don't think "so". Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Felonies! Report post Posted June 15, 2006 You "think?" Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Ripper 0 Report post Posted June 15, 2006 I still say I brought the kickass to that thing. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
k thx 0 Report post Posted June 16, 2006 CHAPTER 15 ::The B Team bomb through the rainy streets of Canada, North America, with CC in the back seat between AM and Mario. Caboose is driving. chave is playing with the glove compartment:: Mario: Heh heh heh, we rock. chave: hey, Mario. How come you're with us now. Last I heard, you were chasing us trying to avenge fook's death. Mario: Dramatic plot twist. chave: 'kay. Caboose: So, Canadian Chick, you glad we rescued you from the evil A Team? CC: No! Caboose. Yeah, you love me. Wait! You said no! But why? CC: I was having fun. AM: But they kidnapped you, and tied you to Bob Barron. CC: But it was fun. Apart from the Barron bits. Mario: But don't you want to go back home? CC: No, I want to stay back there with Zack. I love him. chave: But why? He sucks. And I rock like a banana on speed. Love me! CC: No. It's so strange. When I look into his eyes it's like fireworks. When I touch him, I get goosepimples. When he says my name, it's like... ::AM throws up:: Caboose: Yeah, what he said. Shut up woman. Mario. So wait. If they didn't kidnap you and hold you against your will, but we did, that means we're the bad guys. chave: OMGWTF~!!! CC: Yeah, and you don't want to be the bad guys, so just turn this car around and take me back to my darling Zack. Caboose: No, it's too late. We started this war with the A-Team, and I'm damn sure we're gonna finish it. CC: NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! -------------------- :::The chase is on, as the A team comes speeding up behind the B-teams van::: :::The most kick ass of kick ass car chases follow...you know...like the one in Ronin with a little Matrix and Bad Boys II kicked in. Just a bunch of shit blowing up for no other reason than it looking cool. Yet hour heros(and our heros-turned villians) remain perfectly unharmed...they just have really tore Canada up.::: ------------------------ ::After a lovely car chase, the B-Team arrive at a safe house. However due to Cabooses ineptitude, the A-Team swiftly find them and pull up outside the house. Wondering why the lack of a coherent story for this? The thread deleted the post that explained this shocking turn of events. Yeah, bollocks, I know. Why not make your own explaination about what happened? It's fun to create!:: ----------------------- ::Inside the house:: Caboose: Damn it, I knew we should have hidden the car somewhere. AM: So, what do we do now boss? Caboose: Mario. Get that box I told you to bring from the car. ::Mario brings a large wooden crate to Caboose, wh opens it up:: Caboose: In here we've got all the weapons we could possibly need to defeat the A-Team. Guns. Grenades. Bulletproof vests. Samuri swords. chave: Sweet. Caboose. Lets get upstairs and barricade ourselves in a bedroom. Mario: But what about the old couple who live here. ::Scan acroos to a shot of an old husband and wife who Caboose tied and gagged earlier:: Caboose: They'll keep. Mario, bring Canadian Chick. ::Mario grabs Canadian Chick and tries to force her up to the bedroom, but she sees Ripper pull out his weapon and start shooting it at Zach outside, and breaks away from his grip:: Caboose: Come back here bitch or I'll shoot. CC: NOOOOOOOOO! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
k thx 0 Report post Posted June 17, 2006 CHAPTER 16 ::The A-Team looks above into the room holding the B Team: Zack: THOSE BASTARDS! Choken: Calm Down... ---------------- ::Suddenly, a rumble causes everyone to fall to the ground. Just as they attempt to stand again, another earthquake throws them back to their butts:: ::Caboose looks up, and suddenly begins laughing hysterically:: ::CWM looks up as a shadow falls across them all, and is infuriated:: CWM: No . . . no, that bastard henchman wouldn'y POSSIBLE betray ME! ::Above them . . . . THE BARD-ZORD STANDS!:: ::Spider-Bard leaps down to the ground, dressed in a black trenchcoat himself. The visor of his Ranger helmet shifts back to reveal dark eyes that fix themselves on CWM:: SB: Hi boss . . . ::SB hauls two pistols out and takes aim at CWM! BETRAYAL~!:: To Be Continued . . . Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
