Butterfly Pandemic Could Kill WWE!

[Guest accountingwarrior]

“Butterfly Pandemic Could Kill WWE!”

 

Dear Wrestling Fans,

 

Smackdown and ECW’s Biggest Party of the Summer has featured something that has not been picked up by the major wrestling news outlets like the Wrestling Observer and Wrestling Torch. Some of you may think the story is why is “Mark Henry so afraid of Matt Hardy it takes him 5 minutes of stalling to get in the ring with him even though he has a weight advantage of over a 150 pounds?”. The other half of you might think the story is why can’t “David Taylor kick out of a backslide by Ray Gordy even though Taylor had 30 more years of experience than Gordy?” However this is not the news breaking wrestling story I am referring to.

 

The big story is the Diva Limbo Challenge featuring Kelly Kelly, Brooke, and Layla El. Two lucky male fans get to hold the limbo stick when the Divas go under the stick. If you pay attention closely you can see the WWE ladies give the male fans a butterfly. The definition of a Butterfly is a slap to the private area. Now an argument can be made the Diva’s are just trying to achieve balance by stretching their arms and the slap to the family jewels is just accidentally but I don’t believe that is the case. The disturbing part of the situation is many of these fans volunteering are under the age of 18, which can be viewed has a form of sexual assault in most legal districts. Many theories are being tossed around has to why the ladies of ECW are acting in an inappropriate manor to the general male WWE audience. Wrestling critics are saying the perverted behavior is the result of the Divas being exposed to extremely sexual songs like Man Eater and Pour Some Sugar on Me during their weekly ECW dance routine. Some dirt sheet writers may say the Divas are going butterfly crazy because they had one too many Flaming Doctor Peppers and Snake Bites backstage. The real truth is the ECW Divas are told by Vince McMahon to do the butterfly slap. Vince wants a highly sexual legal lawsuit to break out between a minor and an ECW diva to give the promotion some national publicity. WWE had hoped the car explosion that killed Vince would give the promotion this type of negative publicity but so far it hasn’t worked out that way. Mr. McMahon feels sex sells in the American pop culture and this is the perfect scam to get free negative publicity. As the past has shown Vince feels strongly that even bad publicity is good publicity because it’s practically free advertising.

 

I missed the story that C.M Punk is forced to hold up a tropical tree plant prop during his post match celebration because he’s still being punished for dating Maria. I will save that story for another day. For now, I think all current WWE stockholder should send their letters and emails to World Wrestling Entertainment that the butterfling of WWE fans should be stopped immediately. I feel the higher powers of the WWE might be underestimating the strain a major sexual harassment, which could be the straw that breaks the WWE empire for entirety. Peace out and have a nice day

 

Sincerely,

 

Chickie Singer

 

[Nate 0]

what in the heck...

[bob_barron 0]

That's a blast from the past