PROMO: Underdog?!

[Mad Scientist 0]

Ben Hardy turns back to his cameraman as they hurry down a well-lit hallway and huffs in exasperation. "Hurry up, you buffoon! If we miss this appointment..." The two men enter a room on the right of the hall. Inside they find a series of scale models and anatomical posters of human muscle groups, skeletons, and nerve structures. In the midst of this panorama stands a musing Michael Alexander, examining a fully modeled human nerve structure on a mannequin. He's carrying his title belt over his shoulder. "Sorry we're running late, sir," begins the embarrassed interviewer.

 

Alexander cuts him off. "Your inadequate grasp of time is not my concern." The Evil Genius turns toward Hardy and the camera. "My concern right now is one Andrew Rickmen, who calls himself the 'Insane Luchador.'"

 

"I'm sure, sir," Hardy replies with practiced poise. "After winning the match at Downward Spiral, the Ill One has named his stipulation, a 2 out 3 falls hardcore match! What are your thoughts about that? And about him sending you a message by using the Event Horizon to beat MANSON?"

 

Michael snorts derisively. "Using the Event Horizon? My thoughts on that? Rickmen, what do you think that tells me? It tells me that you couldn't get the job done with your own maneuvers...but they say imitation is the sincerest form of flattery, so I suppose I'm flattered." He smiles at this last.

 

"With regards to the stipulation, it does seem that Mr. Rickmen has put you in a situation that you have yet to confront during your time in the SWF...and a situation that certainly favors the challenger, in both chances for victory and tactics." Hardy adds pointedly.

 

"Yes, I'm sure Rickmen thinks that," Alexander laughs. "And I admit, hardcore matches are Rickmen's element. They usually are the element of those who can't compete with true skill and athleticism. He has made his nom de guerre synonymous with hardcore matches. Rickmen has also made his name synonymous with taking punishment. Well, that works well for me, because I have made my name synonymous dealing out punishment and inflicting pain. And a hardcore environment includes so many new and interesting opportunities for that."

 

"You don't think you are an underdog in this situation?" Hardy inquires.

 

"Underdog?" Alexander looks genuinely surprised.

 

"Well, you are still a rookie, confronting a veteran in a match that he is famous for," Hardy points out.

 

Alexander's face contorts in fury for a moment before his wicked grin begins to spread. "Hardy, I may be a rookie, but in my short time in the SWF I have achieved more than the 'Insane Luchador' has in over seven years. I AM the SWF World Heavyweight Champion. I've beaten the best in the SWF to get here. I've pinned Toxxic and MANSON. I've submitted Spike Jenkins, Jimmy the Doom, and Danny Dagda, among others. I have made it through my own singular talent for inflicting pain. Yes, Rickmen will be in his element. So much the better. That way, once I've beaten him, once he's tapped out, he'll have nothing to blame but his own inadequacies." Alexander takes the microphone from Hardy and sweeps his arm around the room. "Take a look at these items, Rickmen. Every one has stories to tell. Every part of the human body is a tool, a fulcrum, a switch that I can turn on or off to inflict pain. And that's with merely my own wrestling skills. Just think of the havoc I can wreak with the aid of additional implements. You've said before that you enjoy pain, Rickmen. If that's true, then you are in for quite a treat at Hell Freezes Over, because there aren't names for many of the agonies you are going to suffer. I'm going to break and twist things inside of you, and when I'm done you'll be just another subject to be resigned to the refuse heap. Enjoy your brief time in the spotlight, Rickmen. It's the last time you'll have it as anything other than an object lesson. And how apropos that that match should occur at a Pay-per-View whose title indicates your chances...because you'll only take this belt when Hell freezes over." Michael Alexander pats the belt on his shoulder, and the camera focuses in on the title belt and the interview cuts to black.

[HollywoodSpikeJenkins 0]

And that is why Michael Alexander is the SWF World Champion.

[Toxxic 0]

Yes, I think I'm definitely looking forward to this one. And Michael Alexander is starting to sound like Nicodemus from the Dresden Files.

[The Ill One 0]

I'm so glad that you're willing to build this up, man. Honestly.

 

Good promo but if you want to name drop, well, it's time for me to write a promo for you to one-up.

[Mad Scientist 0]

Yes, I think I'm definitely looking forward to this one. And Michael Alexander is starting to sound like Nicodemus from the Dresden Files.

 

Now that is certainly a compliment...now where'd I put that coin?

 

I'm so glad that you're willing to build this up, man. Honestly.

 

Good promo but if you want to name drop, well, it's time for me to write a promo for you to one-up.

 

How could I not build up a hardcore match against a guy famous for using a set of strapped-together florescent light bulbs named after a mythical weapon wielded by a semi-mythical archetypal monarch?

 

I have a horrible feeling I'm going to lose this name-dropping battle I've started though...