Who You Crappin'?

[Guest blame that goot.]

Has someone lied to you? Has someone misled you, told you a half-truth, a complete falsehood, or engaged in an act of blatant verbal hypocrisy? Here is your chance to point out these instances. The rules are simple:

 

1. The target can be anyone, anywhere, from sports, to beyond sports, to the board.

2. Something someone said, not something someone did.

3. It has to be one of the aforementioned transgressions. Typos and minor slip-ups don't qualify.

 

Style points will be given for the quality of the transgression and how well you present it. I can't promise that I'll quantify this well, though. It might end up like Whose Line.

 

This thread may end up being moved to the socket.

 

SAMPLE

As we've been over several times now, Franchester displayed his disgust with Chicago Cubs fans during last week's series with the Cincinnati Reds. After the bleacher bums threw a bevy of baseballs back following an Adam Dunn homer, Marty said the following:

far and away the most obnoxious fans in baseball in this league are those who follow this team right here. Throwing 15 or 18 balls on the field, there's absolutely no excuse for that and that is so typical of Chicago Cub fans.

This is coming from the same guy who, in 1986, not only watched the Reds faithful of Riverfront Stadium throw batteries and other debri directly at an umpire, but incited the fans who brought their radios to the game to act in this fashion, ultimately being censured by Bart Giamatti for his role in forcing an umpire out of a game. So which is it, Marty? Is it unacceptable to throw stuff on the field of play, or is it to be explicitly condoned? Or are you just a doddering old crank with an axe to grind? If you're going to editorialize the ballgame, at least have the good sense to take a consistent stand. Alas, I fear that with this incident putting you in our crosshairs, you'll stay out of this thread as well as Dusty Baker's Reds stay out of the 6-4-3 double play. Marty Brennaman, who you crappin'?

 

SAMPLE DEUX

The Marvin of recent vintage has been a strange Glenn Beck disciple, who, in one instance, smugly recounted an anecdote about how someone fallaciously lauded him for being eco-friendly because of this decal:

This coming from the same person who, in 2000, voted for Ralph Nader OF THE GREEN PARTY. So which is it, Marv? Is the plight of the planet to be mocked and written off as inconsequential, or do we need to elect a president running on an enivronmentalist platform? It's not even as if we're talking about nearly eight years from then to now to rethink matters, because hey, look, check the date,

I need Ralph Nader to run again in 08.

Marvin, stop listening to Glenn Beck, start painting yourself to look like Blanka, and ask yourself, who you crappin'?

 

Don't let me down, board buds. This exercise is tailor-made for message boarding, even moreso than radio, from where I stole it.

[Dandy 0]

yes

[CanadianGuitarist 0]

The first lie (or not-a-truth) that I thought of was Peter Karmanos, who pretty well moved the Hartford Whalers to Raleigh in the middle of the night. This is underscored by my desire to see a Whaler Marvin again.

 

I'm not entirely sure if this is what you were after Czech, but, fuck, sometimes those HoeDowns can be tough to come up with on the spot.

[Guest blame that goot.]

We're looking for something someone said, not something someone did. The key to the exercise is verbally assaulting your target.

[treble 0]

Don't let me down, board buds.

Who you crappin'?

[CanadianGuitarist 0]

We're looking for something someone said, not something someone did. The key to the exercise is verbally assaulting your target.

 

Since I'm not a Sens fan, I can't possibly do the justice that Alexei Yashin should get. I'll leave it up to CC.

[Guest Vitamin X]

Don't let me down, board buds.

Who you crappin'?

^

[Guest blame that goot.]

As an organization, we have to be efficient with every dollar we spend. Whether it's a dollar in Double-A or it's a dollar on a Major League salary, we have to be efficient and we have to utilize our money. As we looked at the right thing for this team, the right thing for this organization and really the right thing for Matt Morris going forward, we came to the realization that the best thing to do was go in a different direction.

 

Bad as Matt Morris may have been to start the year, paying him eleven million, thirty-seven thousand, two hundred and eighty-three dollars NOT to play for the Pittsburgh Pirates is pretty much the opposite of being efficient with every dollar you spend. Though the team may be marginally better with John Van Benschoten in the rotation, are you aware of how many hot dogs and beers it'll take to recoup $11MM+ at the Bucs games practically nobody attends? You represent a new era of Pirates baseball: have some brutal candor and say that the greying old has-been was out of gas. For your sake, I hope you're guilty of a falsehood bordering on verbal hypocrisy, and thus eligible for this thread, because if this is your concept of fiscal responsibility, Pittsburgh is really in for a rough ride. Neal Huntington, who you crappin'?

[The Man in Blak 0]

Bad as Matt Morris may have been to start the year, paying him eleven million, thirty-seven thousand, two hundred and eighty-three dollars NOT to play for the Pittsburgh Pirates is pretty much the opposite of being efficient with every dollar you spend.

 

Actually, it can be the most efficient solution to a bad situation, provided you operate under the premise that Matt Morris is completely done as a major league pitcher, which certainly seems like a well-founded position, considering his recent history in Pittsburgh and the fact that opponents have already dropped 30+ runs on him in his five starts this season.

 

Sunk cost is the operative term here, and if you think that you're not going to get any positive return for the whole season from Morris, then it makes perfect sense to cut your losses and try to see what you can get from your young arms in the minors, like JVB or Sean Burnett; even if Morris's younger replacement isn't better, you gain value by adding more data to your assessment of JVM/Burnett, as well as aiding their development with additional experience in the majors.

 

The Morris contract itself was a terrible idea, don't get me wrong, but taking the club to task for not continuing to take on water for that mistake is a little unfair, isn't it?

 

You represent a new era of Pirates baseball: have some brutal candor and say that the greying old has-been was out of gas.

 

Comments like these are easy to dish out as snark, but have much greater consequences in the actual working world. Considering the various and sundry grievances that players had against Dave Littlefield and the previous administration, Huntington already has an uphill battle to re-establish positive working relationships with players and potential free agents - dancin' like Soulja Boy after turfing a classy guy like Morris doesn't really help the situation.

[Guest blame that goot.]

Snark is why we're here

 

I thought about sunk costs, but the scenario you outlined isn't "very efficient," it's just making the best of a bad situation. The sheer size of the sunk cost makes it hard to reconcile it with anything resembling fiscal responsibility. They could've tried to trade him or hope for the best down the line (Ted Lilly is having a shit start to the season too). Bottom line, they never should've even gotten Matt Morris in the first place. That was just one straight-up dumb trade, I'm sorry.

[The Man in Blak 0]

I thought about sunk costs, but the scenario you outlined isn't "very efficient," it's just making the best of a bad situation.

 

Yeah, I edited that into my post right before you dropped in, apparently. Obviously, the trade was abysmal, but you might also keep in mind that Huntington didn't make the trade in the first place.

[Xavier Cromartie 0]

The issue is Tim Tebow's performing circumcisions in the Philippines.

 

Considering the rate of HIV infections in the 3rd world, Tim Tebow is being a lot more productive than being a shitty QB in North America.

That's cause places like north america have less problems than Africa and Philippines which means less cases of STDs or AIDs here than there.

Rate of HIV infection in the Philippines: .01% (9,400 of 84 million).^[1]

Rate of HIV infection in North America: .39% (1.3 million of 335 million).^[2]

 

RepoMan and Kawalimus, who you crappin'?

[CanadianGuitarist 0]

I'm kind of indifferent to this subject (speficially, an athlete I've never heard of, who presumably threw a dart at a map) - but Ortonsault: That's an oh snap reply! I mean shit, I had no idea what HIV stats were in the Phillipines, but if I were going to do HIV work in any way, I could name a dozen countries I'd likely go first.

 

Check out my recent comment in CTDWAT here before replying (if there's an answer), but it's always been kind of rumoured that when a young Ben Hogan was carjacked, it was Byron Nelson who picked him up. Ben said in an interview that he didn't remember who it was. But there was always a kind of unspoken rivalry between him, Nelson, and Sam Snead (who were all born within six months of one another, all enjoyed golf success during the pre-PGA Tour days, shortly after WW2).

 

Again, a reply to my CTDWAT post may supercede, but Ben Hogan, who you crappin'?