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Tony149

HD: CAE vs. LDCMG

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Patty Rule in effect.

 

BUFFER
Ladies and gentlemen, the following return match is scheduled for one fall and is for the ONE & ONLY WORLD TAG TEAM CHAMPIONSHIP!

“Like the Angel” by Rise Against cues and two pyro rockets shoot into the air as identical twin sensations MARV and MEL high-five onstage. 

BUFFER
Introducing first, the challengers… from Edmonton, Alberta Canada… total combined weight 370 pounds... the team of MARV and MEL... THE CHRIST AIR EEEEXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXPPRRRRRREEEEEESSSSSSSSS!!!!

"YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!"

MARV and MEL swing into the air and pump their fists.  

COLE
In many people’s minds we are looking at the uncrowned tag team champions, Coach. 

COACH
But was the ruling not correct? 

COLE
Indeed it was. The footage aired on OAOAST Syndicated proved that. 

COACH
Then everybody ought to quit whining. 

“The World is Mine” by David Guetta is piped through the speakers and down the green and gold lit stage the World tag team champions and Theodore Moneymaker walk. 

BUFFER
And their opponents, accompanied by the Chief Executive Officer of THE ENTERPRISE, THEODORE MONEYMAKER! Total combine weight 420 pounds, THE ONE & ONLY WORLD TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS… COLIN MAGUIRE, JR., SPENCER REIGER… THE LDC MMMOOOONNEYGANG!!

"BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!"

As Moneymaker readies his men for action, the referee converses with ring announcer Michael Buffer.

BUFFER
Ladies and gentlemen, I’ve just been informed Theodore Moneymaker has until the count of 10 to leave ringside or not only will the LDC Moneygang lose the match…but also the One & Only World tag team championship! 

"YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!"

MONEYMAKER
:huh:

Moneymaker throws a fit, as do the LDCMG. 

COLE
The match hasn’t even begun and we already have fireworks. Theodore Moneymaker’s been ejected! 

COACH
I’ve heard of make-up calls in sports, but this is way out of line, Cole. Teddy didn’t do anything wrong. 

COLE
Obviously the OAOAST is trying to level the playing field. 

COACH
By covering up for their referees? Why that’s the smartest thing you’ve said in a long time. They’re stacking the deck against the LDC Moneygang due to public opinion. 

ONE!
TWO!
THREE!
FOUR!

After a final word with the LDCMG, Moneymaker leaves to a familiar tune.

“NA NA NA NA, NA NA NA NA, HEY HEY…GOODBYE!”

MONEYMAKER
:angry:

Spencer calls for the microphone.

REIGER
Wait a minute. Before we get it on let’s first try to get along. And what brings people together? Money! So I’ve gotten the okay to offer you guys $100,000...

CMJ
50,000 a piece!

REIGER
…to walk away and forget this whole thing ever happened.

CMJ
Yeah. Sorry for the inconvenience. 

The CAE think the offer over and nod their heads. 

REIGER
(laughs)
I think we have a deal. 

Both team shake hands, and then the CAE deck the LDCMG!

"YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!"

* DINGDINGDING *

The CAE stay on the offensive, whipping the champs in for BAAAAAACK body drops. DOUBLE KICKFLIPS knock the LDCMG to the floor, then MEL uses MARV as a springboard to perform a SHOOTING STAR SUICIDA! 

COLE & COACH
:o

MEL dumps Reiger back in and the CAE send him to THE PEARLY GATES!

The cover.

ONE!

TWO!

KICKOUT!

MARV removes the tag belt around Reiger’s waist and holds it high to the crowd’s delight. Nick Patrick yanks it from MARV and goes to hand it to Buffer as Reiger reverses a whip and CMJ smacks MARV across the back with the other tag belt! 

"BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!"

COLE
Don’t tell me it’s gonna end like this. 

COACH
It is! 

The cover.

ONE!

TWO!

NO!

"YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!"

COLE
He kicked out! The kid kicked out!

Reiger rams MARV into the buckle and tags CMJ, who immediately unloads a series of Irish uppercuts. MARV ducks a back elbow and delivers a RUNNING DDT on the rebound!

The cover.

ONE!

TWO!

SAVE BY REIGER!

The LDCMG work MARV over and send him in for the ride, but MARV puts on the brakes and takes both Enterprise members down with THE JAWJACKER!

COLE
MARV must collect coupons because he just got 2 for the price of 1. 

COACH
With that kind of material you’re a shoo-in to host next years Oscars. 

The CAE tag and MEL enters a house afire slamming and dropkicking both LDCMG members. DOUBLE COCONUT sends them their separate ways. MEL whips CMJ in for a FLYING CORNER CLOTHESLINE, then slams him down and climbs up top. 

COLE
Are we gonna see a second Shooting Star?

The answer is yes, but CMJ moves and MEL lands on his feet. CMJ hooks the arm and executes a RELEASE OVERHEAD CHICKEN-WING SUPLEX THAT DROPS MEL STOMACH-FIRST ON THE TOP TURNBUCKLE!!

COACH
DAYUM~!

Reiger yanks MEL down from the apron as CMJ delivers his ultra rare ONE MAN SPANISH FLY!!!

COLE
Boondock Saint!

COACH
Where’s the damn referee?!?

We learn trying to pull apart Reiger and MEL. CMJ taps Nick Patrick on the shoulder to grab his attention. Meanwhile, the CAE pull off another SECRET SWITCH~! 

COACH
Oh no, not this again. 

Suddenly MEL kips up and fires away on CMJ. MEL wrings the arm and gives CMJ a NOSEPLANT!  

The cover.

ONE!

TWO!

SAVE BY REIGER!

MEL and Reiger trade blows until Reiger rakes the eyes, but MEL reverses and telegraphs a backdrop, allowing the LDCMG to hit THE SPIKE REIGER COUNTER!!

COLE
Spike Reiger Counter out of nowhere!

The cover.

ONE!

TWO!

THREE!!!

* DINGDINGDING *

BUFFER
The winners of the match and STILL your One & Only World tag team champions… COLIN MAGUIRE, JR., SPENCER REIGER… THE LDC MMMOOOONNEYGANG!!

"BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!"

Nick Patrick awards the tag titles to the LDCMG, who proceed to mock the CAE with a leaping high-five of their own.

COLE
Heck of an effort by the Christ Air Express, but one mistake cost them dearly. 

COACH
Justice was served if you ask me. The CAE again tried to get away with an illegal switch and got punished for it. 

The celebration is on backstage as Theodore Moneymaker, Christian Wright and Lorelei DeCenzo shower the LDCMG with champagne. In the background a CHILI STAND AND BAKE SALE set up by 

http://www.childstarlets.com/lobby/bios/portraits/emma_watson12.jpg
[b]MAYA DUNCAN-BLANCHARD[/b] to help the earthquake victims in Chile and raise a little money for her school the Beverly Vista School (smart girl, OAOAST superstars are handsomely paid).  Eating quite a bit of Maya's goods is the hungriest man in the OAOAST, Jumbo.

MAYA
Uh, I appreciate you spending enough to field a small army, but haven't you had enough?

JUMBO
I'll tell you when I've had enough! I am not a food addict!  Food does not eat me, I eat food! My stomach does not control me, I can stop eating anytime! Anytime I want! Can I have five more bags of jelly beans please?

MAYA
:huh: 

CMJ (pushing Jumbo aside)
Shove off fatso.

WRIGHT
Yes, begone bestial fiend! Your girth offends us.

REGIER (singing)
We are the champions my friends, dun dun dun!

MONEYMAKER (singing)
And we'll keep on fighting to the end!

REIGER AND MONEYMAKER
We are the champions, we are the champions, no time for losers because we are the champions...of the world!

MAYA
Oh hi! Would you like to commemorate your victory with some delicious chili? Or maybe a yummy sugar cookie? I promised Aunt Alix hasn't loaded any of them with her um...special herbs, at least not since the DEA came sniffing around last week.

CMJ
Aren’t you gonna congratulate the champs on their big win, little girl? 

MAYA
No, but I appreciate you guys keeping the belts warm for my mom and Alix at AngleMania. 

MONEYMAKER
:lol: 

LORELEI
Smart mouthed and rude, just like your mother.

REIGER
Ah, to be young and naïve again. Let me to bring you back to reality, kid. We are the One & Only World tag team champions. It’s your hope for a title change at AngleMania. But as the real world’s shown, hope and change isn’t always what it’s cracked up to be. A lesson we’ll remind your mom and Alix and all their Hollywood friends at AngleMania. 

CMJ
What’s with the stand? 

MAYA
Uh, hello? 
(points to sign above stand)
“Chili for Chile.” and a bakesale for my school, the Beverly Vista School

Moneymaker dips his finger in a bowl of Chili. 

MAYA
Hey! 

MONEYMAKER
(tastes chili, spits it out)
This stuff tastes like shit. People could get sick eating from it. 

CMJ
Eh, you're just too picky, Ted, lemme try one of those cookies....shit I chipped a fhakin tooth! What are these made out of? Concrete and ass?

JUMBO
Mighty fine ass at that!

CMJ (grimacing from the pain(
Shaddup, tons of fun.

MONEYMAKER
Boys, do as any good food critic would do.

While CMJ tries to cope with the outstanding pain in his mouth, Spencer Reiger tips the entire table over sending Maya's precious food scattering everywhere.

MAYA
:(

REIGER
Oops, my fault.

MONEYMAKER
:lol:

REIGER (shouting over his shoulder)
Tell your mother to get me Julia Roberts autograph when she goes to the Oscars. My mom loves her.

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