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About this blog

It's a dirty job, but someone's gotta do it.

Entries in this blog

How To Vibrate
 

This Is How We Do It

This is How We Do It
La ra ra ra ra ra...

This is how we do it.
Its friday night, and I feel all right
The party is here on the west side
So I reach for my 40 and I turn it up
Designated driver take the keys to my truck
Hit the shore cause Im faded
Honeys in the street say, monty, yo we made it!
It feels so good in my hood tonight
The summertime skirts and the guys in kani
All the gang bangers forgot about the drive-by
You gotta get your groove on, before you go get paid
So tip up your cup and throw your hands up
And let me hear the party say

1- Im kinda buzzed and its all because
(this is how we do it)
South central does it like nobody does
(this is how we do it)
To all my neighbors you got much flavor
(this is how we do it)
Lets flip the track, bring the old school back
(this is how we do it)

This is how we do it, all hands are in the air
And wave them from here to there
If youre an o.g. mack or a wanna-be player
You see the hoods been good to me
Ever since I was a lower-case g
But now Im a big g. the girls see I got the money
A hundred-dollar bills yall

If you were from where Im from then you would know
That I gotta get mine in a big black truck
You can get yours in a 64

Whatever it is, the partys underway
So tip up your cup and throw your hands up
And let me hear the party say
(repeat 1...)

Im kinda buzzed and its all because
(this is how we do it)
South central does it like nobody does
(this is how we do it)
Ynv, scc, all my homies
(this is how we do it)
Ill never come wack on an old school track

Rap:

Check it out!
Once upon a time in 94
Montell made no money and life sure was slow
All they said was 68 he stood
And people thought the music that he made was good
There lived a d.j. and paul was his name
He came up to monty, this is what he said
You and og are gonna make some cash
Sell a million records and well make in a dash

(repeat 1, ad lib to fade...)
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

10
How To Vibrate
 

A list of Creepy TV shows

In the history of television, there have always been shows that creeped me out for some reason or another. Here's a list of those shows.   -Wondershowzen: Granted, I like this show, but when people call it ther anti-Sesame Street, it's true. It's funny, but good God it's disturbing. The "Beat Kids" segments, while amusing, are just flat out creepy. How the hell do they get these kids to say this stuff anyways?   -MadTV: Not only the worst comedy show on TV. The skits were Michael "Being the Voice of Ghandi on Clone-High is the only good thing that happened in my career and oh God please, kill me before I open my fucking mouth" McDonald plays a man-child are not only lame, but also creepy. And I mean "Prisoners masturbate to this" creepy.   -Lazytown: If you've ever flipped through channels in the afternoon. then there's a good chance that you've seen this nightmare from Nick jr. Featuring unhealthy attention to men's packages and asses, and creepy puppets, this show is as disturbing as children's entertainment hets. The kicker though, is Stephanie, a girl (who's 15) with a pink wig and a disturbingly short skirt, who's become a pin-up fantasy for pedophiles world wide.   -Totally Spies: I've seen this on Cartoon Network, and I refuse to believe that it's a show for little girls. That's because each and every episode seems to have moments that focus on what get's the lonley animators off. Oh, and there's constant attention paid to female ass. While I have no problem looking at chicks asses, the fact that this is a cartoon, and for kids, puts a bad taste in my mouth. See also: Code Lyoko.
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

9
How To Vibrate
 

Songs I never want to hear in bars again

I frequent bars. Who doesn't? That out of the way, here is a list of songs I don't want to hear in a bar ever again, and why.   Bon Jovi-"Livin' On a Prayer" and "Bad Medicine"-There is nothing worse than coming into a bar and hearing a bunch of drunk fratboy's warbling Bon Jovi off key. These songs are the worst offenders, and need to be put to sleep in bars. Metallica-"Enter Sandman"-It's done to death people-we get it, you like to sing along to it after a long day, and then get high fives from your best pals. Also, what is up with tough guys singing along to "Nothing Else Matters" and getting all weepy. That song has the power to turn these guys into pussies in no time. Anything from Kid Rock-Really, just stop playing anything from him. Don't you ever wonder if the DJ, or if you frequent strip clubs (I don't-sorry) the strippers hate having to hear this, or at least get tired of it? Just stop playing this guy for the love of God. Garth Brooks-"Low Places"-It's like the ultimate drunk redneck asshole anthem. It's cancer to the ears. I'm from Southern Ohio, and if there is any modern country anthem that needs to be retired the most, it's this one. Fergie-"Fergilicious"-This has replaced "All I Wanna Do" and the works of Alanis Morrisete as the anthem from obnoxious FUPA and Gunt fat girls going crazy anthem. Anything from Jimmy Buffet-Along with The Eagles and John Mellancamp, nothing fills me with more rage than the works of Jimmy Buffet. Cartman was right about him BTW. Bob Seger-Turn the Page-It gets even worse if it's karaoke night. Actually, never go to a bar-ANY BAR-during karaoke night. AC/DC-"Highway to Hell," "Back in Black," and "Shook me All Night Long"-I like thse songs, but bars have ruined them for me some. Def Leppard-"Pour Some Sugar on Me"-Actually, girls dance really slutty when this plays, so keep playing it. So instead, let's go with... Poison-"Every Rose has it's Thorn"-There, much better. Anything from Sheryl Crow-Fat chicks with Jeff Hardy T-Shirts love singing along to her. It's as awful as you might think. Those are my pics. Feel free to add your own.
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

9
How To Vibrate
 

The Worst Horror Movie Sequals Ever Made

-I forgot to mention in my last entry that I read both "WrestleCrap" and "The Death Of WCW". Still great stuff.   -Anyways, I've changed my mind, and instead decided to list the worst horror movie sequals ever made instead of the worst movie sequals ever made. Here thay are, in no particualr order:   Hellraiser: Bloodline-To me, this is the worst of the seven sequals. Sure, III was the beginning of the downfall, 5 and 6 were dreadful, and 7 and 8 were watchable (I kinda liked 7), but the fourth entry in the series is the worst because IMO, it had so many possibilities (in spite of it's tacked on sci-fi gimmick) to be good. Pinhead gets in some great lines ("Do I look like someone who cares about what God thinks?") and it has some interesting cenobites, as well as a cool backstory. However, it all feels rushed and incomplete. Basically, it feels like a wasted opportunity.   Friday the 13th 8-The worst of the series, this one is really boring, and feels uninspired. Plus, Jason really doesn't do that much in Manhatten.   Zombi 4: After Death-While "Zombi 3" is bad, it's at least entertainingly bad. This one is the worst of the series, as it has no interesting gore, characters, or even interesting Zombies. It's all just really boring, and proof that America isn't the only place were shitty sequals are made. Fun fact: Don "The Dragon" Wilson has a small role in the movie, and from what I read in a book, one of the lead actors is also a gay pornstar.   Return of the Living Dead 4 and 5-These two movies are complete disasters in the world of zombie cinema, and a slap to the face of any ROTLD fan.   Child's Play III-No interesting kills, an underused Chucky, and a horrible ending make this one a complete disaster. At least we got "Bride of Chucky" after this one.   Pet Cemetary II-Dull, nonsensical, and really just pointless, this is one of the worst sequals to a Stephan King Adaptation I can think of.   The Ring 2-To think, Iactually like the remake more than the Japanese original. Here, Samara becomes a cheap Freddy Krueger knock off, and loses everything that made her scary. Way to go Hollywood.   Return Of The Texas Chainsaw Massacre-The only thing good in this movie is Matthew McConaughey as a psychopathic redneck named Vilmer. The rest of this (including Leatherface as a cowardly transvestite) is an insult.   That's all for now. Next time: severely underappreciated Horror movies, part one
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

8
How To Vibrate
 

Obama is President

Yep, he's president. Deal with it. I don't want to hear any dumb "Osama" jokes kkktookmybabyaway, or any others. I do want to know how The Pit is taking it though, so let me know that.   This is pretty big news. If you don't realize this, then you are an idiot. If you don't like it, then tough shit. I'm happy at the moment. I will say though: McCain went out with grace, and Palin (Leena looks up to her BTW-bitch please) looked pissed. Free Republic is having a meltdown. I'm amazed Marvin hasn't killed himself or that Marney isn't plotting assasination (yet.) The Campaign 08 thread is where it belongs. Cynthia McKinney is still a joke, anyone who really thinks Bob Barr had changed is a sucker, Nader-it's like beating a dead horse. Czech, after months of bitching about Obama, voted for Obama. Marney probably muttered "fucking niggers." I almost feel bad for McCain. MikeSC is probably more paranoid than usual. Al Franken didn't win after all (I guess voters remembered "Stuart Saves His Family"), and I'm eally busy at the moment. And happy.   So congrats Obama.
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

8
How To Vibrate
 

Food Network Funky Shit

Well, what did i do other than read, waste time on the internet, and see "Casino Royale" over the weekend? I watched something I never really do watch: The Food Network. As I was watching it, here's the personalities that stuck out the most.   Emeril: I swear, this man is on drugs, because I haven't seen an adult man this excited on television in a long time. The sheer hyperactivity is alarming, because you are waiting for him to have a heart attack down the road. Really, I'm suprised to see that the man is still alive.   Rachael Ray: She's not that ugly. Sure, she sounds like a guy, but she has a decent body. She's pretty damn annoying though, and from what I hear, she has a daytime talkshow now. It's amazing to see a woman so oppsessed with making quick meals.   Alton Brown: AKA Mr. Know it all. This guy really seems to think that he is God's gift to food related television programs. The "humor" applied to his "Good Eats" show is piss poor at best. Also, he looks like a child molester. Come on, look at the motherfucker, he practically screams "Hey kid, I've got candy in my car. Wanna hop in?"   Paula Dean: I have officially found a new induction into my "creepy television" list. This woman honestly scares the shit out of me with her cheerful demenor, love of all things fat and buttery, ungrateful brats, creepy smile, and well, the list goes on. There is no way this lady will ever have a heart attack, since her entire bloodstream is obviously made up of mayo, butter, fat, and high levels of sodium and cholesterol. She's always smiling, which leads me to think she's got some serious psychological issues. Come on, no one smiles that damn much. She's almost always cheerful, causing me to wonder if she's got corpses of sexually abused children in her home like Gacy did. Oh, then there's her two adult sons. Holy shit, is there a bigger pair of fucking ungrateful brats on television today? I think not. Honestly, if I were Paula Dean, I would have killed myself years ago.   So those are the 4 people on The Food Network that scare me the most.
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

7
How To Vibrate
 

The "death" of Vince McMahon

Vince, you old bastard, you did it: You got me to post in the WWE folders again.   In case you haven't seen it, Vince got in his lime last night at the end of Raw, and   Yep, they killed the Mr. McMahon character. Or at least for a while.   This is awesome. Yeah, it's dumb, but that's why it's great. TNA may have some of the better workers, but they can't come up with something like this. They come up with bullshit like VKM tormenting the WWE or Ron Killings doing horrible raps dissing the WWE. This is one of the reasons why compared to Vince, no matter how bad the product is (it's actually been decent lately), is still more interesting and better than TNA. I only watch TNA every now and again. I watch WWE more. Hell, it's got me posting in the WWE folders again, which I haven't done in ages.   I am talking about wrestling again, which I haven't done in ages. I haven't been this interested in a long time. This folks, is good television.   Of course, Vince will return. But for now, let's enjoy it.
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

7
How To Vibrate
 

Return of The Mack

-First things first: That "mutant baby" picture (it's Czech's new Avatar Picture) scares the fucking shit out of me. That may be one of the scariest things I've seen on the internet, and I've seen some terrifying shit on the internet.   -I can seem to quit listening to the new Ghostface Killah album. It's that damn good. Anyone who enjoys hip hop should give this one a listen. Plus, it doesn't cost very much, and it's got some awesome producers (the late J.Dilla, Pete Rock, MF Doom, Just Blaze). Also, I'm looking forward to the new Current 93 CD (should be out by May or June), the new Aphex Twin CD (out on the 18th. It has the best tracks from last years Analord vinyl series), the new Mono album (a great post-rock band from Japan. It's being produced by Steve Albini), and a re-issue of shoegazer band Chapterhouse's album Whirlpool (complete with bonus tracks from ep's). Also, I might get the new Goldfrapp CD, and the new one from The Sounds (they are a new guilty pleasure for me).   -All of my classes were cancled yesterday. I still got a ton of homework to do.   -A guy in a dorm a few rooms from me keeps playing the three songs over and over again, and it's driving me crazy: Lovers And Friends by Usher w/ Lil' Jon and Ludacris, The Crossroads by Bone Thugs N Harmony, and Love by Keisha Cole. I have to hear these songs for 50 minutes every fucking morning.
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

6
How To Vibrate
 

on conspiracy theories

Well, there's a thread in the Current Events folder that deals with a new "documentary" movie called "loose Change", which says Bush caused 9/11.   You know, I've never believed in conspriracy theories (except for JFK), and for many reasons. Here's a few reasons why:   1.) They lack logic. Sure, people will tell you that they think the Bush administration bombed the WTC on 9/11. Thing is, there are three things that prove this to be bullshit, Actually, there are others, but here are the three reasons that come to my head right now.   -The fact that we saw fucking planes hit the WTC. Come on, the impact itself would make any building, no matter how large it is, collapse. Look up the facts. Scientists themselves have proven all of these theoris wrong. -The fact that the Government wouldn't attack something that is helpful to the economy, or it's own Country. Come on, I may hate Bush, but he's not that stupid, and he's not that evil. Oh, and another thing conspiracy theorists: Prove that there was missle that attacked the Pentagon. You can't, and that's because there was FUCKING PLANE WRECKAGE THERE, YOU PARANOID SHIT EATING FUCKING ASSHOLES. DO YOU FUCKERS EVEN CARE ABOUT THE FACT THAT THOUSANDS OF PEOPLE LOST THEIR LIVES ON THAT DAY? DO YOU REALIZE THAT YOU LOONEY CONSPIRACIES UNDERMINE THE DEATHS OF ALL THOSE PEOPLE? -The fact that Al-Qaeda pretty much said that they were the ones responsible.   2.) Many of them are Anti-Semetic. That's right, one of the most popular 9/11 conspiracy theories right now is that the Jews caused it. If history has proven has taught me anything, it's that no matter what horrible event happens in history, then their are people who will blame the Jews. They'll blame them on Pearl Harbor, Katrina, The crash of the Hindenburg, the assassinations of JFK and Lincoln-pretty much just about anything bad you can think of, there are people who will blame it on the jews.   3.) The fact that you can't cover something up for a long time. Let's face it, most people can't keep a secret or a lie for a long time, and nobody can keep a secret of a conspiracy level magnitude for very long. It's just the truth.   In the end, I have this to say: Conspiracy Theories are bullshit. The government didn't cause 9/11. The Holocaust did happen, no matter what it's deniers tell you. We did land on the moon. Extraterrestrials are not abducting rednecks in cornfields. Conspiracy Theories are bullshit, and every one who thinks that they are the stone cold truth is a nutcase who should be locked up in a looney bin.   Oh, and one more thing to the 9/11 conspiracy theorists: Even Oliver Stone thinks that your theories are bullshit. Let that sink in for a while.
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

6
How To Vibrate
 

Happy 4th of...Oh wait, never mind

-Well, it seems like Ken Lay kicked the bucket. Disappointed that he died, because I was hoping he would be embarressed and scorned by the public for a while longer. It's times like this that I almost miss MikeSC, because of how he would try to spin this and somehow blame liberals on the worlds ills. Oh well   -North Korea launched some missles, that landed in the oceans of Japan, Fortunately, Godzilla (or any other monster) hasn't been awakened..yet.   -My summer job working on computers is doing ok. It's not exciting, but it's not soul crushing levels of boring.   -RVD and Sabu got busted with pot. This just sounds like a stoner comedy.   -The new ECW sucks, though you probably already read that in the WWE folder.   -"Superman Returns" is pretty good. I'd rate it behind "Batman Begins" though. Also, I've been shouting out WRONG ever since I saw it.   -I'm starting to think that Leena isn't really a Randy Orton fan, but instead just acting like she is just to annoy people.   that's all for now. Next time: whatever
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

6
How To Vibrate
 

lovecraft231 is dead

-Yep, I got a name change. Why? Because let's face it, lovecraft231 is a shitty name. Besides, gary floyd is much better. It's what makes pussy so great. It's the reason Arnold did "Commando". It's what everyone needs, and you can never have too much of it. Actually, it's the name of a Butthole Surfers song, and it never did any of those things.   -It's been a year since Katrina. What have I learned? Well, I learned that Kanye West hates Bush. I also learned more about the sheer incompetence of the current administration. Oh, and all hail Chocolate City, and it's Vanilla Suburbs.   -I'm tired of hearing about John Mark Karr. I was actually glad to hear about Tom Cruise, that's how tired I am of seeing Karr.   -wildpegasus is continuing to tard up NHB, and for some reason, I love it. I mean, it's incredibly annoying, but it's also incredibly hilarious. I think it's just the sheer pathetic aura of the man, as well as the reactions he's getting from others. Oh, and according to him, their was no hip movement.   -Check out Weird Al's Myspace to hear "Don't Download This Song". It's hilarious.   -Oblivious Heel was banned. Thank God   -Finally, thank you to KingPK, for having my name changed.
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

6
How To Vibrate
 

Resident Evil:Extinction (Day 2)

02.) Resident Evil: Extinction (2007)

Plot: The third entry in the "Resident Evil" movie franchise sees Alice (Milla Jovovich) and a band of survivors from the previous (horrible) movie (including Oded Fehr and Mike "Where's Ice Cube?" Epps) and some new faces (Ali Larter as Claire Redfield and Ashanti-yes, that Ashanti) in a world reduced to a desert by the T-Virus. There's still plenty of undead, and the Umbrella Corperation want Alice-as she's the original. See, there's these clones-oh come on, you aren't watching this for plot.

Review: Not a good movie by any stretch of the imagination, the third entry in the series is actually the best of the series so far. Sure, it's far from original-cribbing elements from Day of the Dead (1985) (domesticating the dead) and The Mad Max movies (post apocalyptic desert landscape), but it at least has some decent points to go with the mindless action.

For starters, there is thankfully more undead action this time around, with sun baked zombies at nearly every corner. Also absent this time is dreadful Nu-Metal, and that's always a plus. The acting is at least competant, and the movie itself is the most competantly directed entry in the series, managing to make sure you don't get bored for the large part. Also, if you don't like Ashanti, you'll be glad to know her role is small (as is her time in the movie).

That out of the way, the fact that Alice has powers and superhuman abilities (from the last movie, which I like to pretend didn't happen) is really dumb. That reminds me, you really don't care about anybody in this movie, as there is no character development whatsoever throughout. People appaear and disappear, and those who die are people you really didn't see much of anyways. The ending also leaves room for yet another sequal, and really, do we need another one. Ok, it made about $150 Million worldwide, so it's inevetible. That out of the way,t he series needs to end, as we can't keep getting sequal after sequal. It's tiresome.

Still, it's a decent Saturday afternoon flick, and if you don't think too hard while watching it, you might sorta enjoy it.

Final Verdict: 6/10. Dumb popcorn entertainment not at it's best, but hardly at it's worst, and is at least the best "Resident evil" movie so far. Check it out if nothing else is on.

Next time: Zombie Bloodbath

Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

6
How To Vibrate
 

Another Day, Another Entry

-Bought the new Ghostface Killah album today. So far, I'm really loving it. Plus, it has J.Dilla (RIP), Pete Rock, Just Blaze, and MF Doom on production, and the entire Wu Tang Clan on the track 9 Milli Bros. I also got Thunder, Lightning, Strike by The Go! Team.   -It seems like tomorrows episode of "South Park" takes a shot on "Family Guy". To be honest, I haven't watched FG in a while. Maybe it's just me, but refrencing 80's pulp culture constantly gets kind of old. Granted, it's not a bad show, I'm just tired of the show, since it's basically a less obnoxious "I Love The 80's"   -Mickie James is the new Women's Champ, and continues to bring on the awesome. Really, how could anyone hate her dressing up just like Trish on Raw last night? Also, great to see Carlito turn face. The guy's really improved lately. On the downside, do we really need Jamal back as the Samoan version of Kamala, only not any fun? Plus, the Shawn vs. Vince feud is still going on. I swear, Vince really hates the fans. What other explanation could there be for this bullshit?   -Finally, I saw the stupidest t-shirt yesterday: it basically said "Keep Arnold From Becoming President in '08". I wanted to tell the guy wearing it that he was an idiot, but I didn't, because I remembered that you can't reason with hippies.
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

5
How To Vibrate
 

Bad Chuck-E-Cheese Memories

When I was a kid of 4-5 years of age, I remember my mom taking me to Chuck-E-Cheese. To say it was a good experience would be a big lie.   I can't believe I still remember this, but here it goes.   I remember that all of the kids were real fucking brats. I mand real brats. The kind of brats who treat all the other kids like shit, scream for God knows what reason, and basically were little worthless bastards. Also, the Animatronic Animals creeped me out as a kid. The things sang with no melody or rhythm, and even looked creepy. I don't care who you are, but if you see a robotic rat singing to you with it's friends, then you are going to be creeped out. Oh, and the games were shit. And don't get me started with the pizza. The worst pizza on Earthy is sold at Chuck-E-Cheese.   Anyways, after that experience, I thought I would never go there again. Think again.   On one of my brother's birthdays in the mid 90's, he wanted to go to Chuck-E-Cheese. I sucked it in and decided to go, thinking "hey, how could it be?" Well, pretty bad.   The pizza was still bad. The games still sucked. The kids were still brats. The worst thing though, was the 17-30 year old guys whyo would go there. These guys didn't come with their families. Oh no, they came with their friends, or usually, by themselves.   I remember playing "Primal Rage" (hell yes), and when I was done, a little kid (about at least 7 years of age) competed with a guy who was in his 20's. The guy in his 20's won, and to make matters worse for the kid, rubbed it in the little guys face.   That's right, these guys went to Chuck-E-Cheese to beat kids at video games so they could feel better about themselves.   How pathetic do you have to be to go to a place for kids 5-10 years of age, just so you can beat those at video games and gloat about it? Answer: Really pathetic. I mean spanking it to furry porn in your mother's basement in your 20's pathetic. The kind of pathetic reserved for would be child molestors with three inch dicks.   The moral of this story? If I ever get married and have kids, I will never go to Chuck-E-Cheese. Never again.   I hate that place.
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

5
How To Vibrate
 

Adventures in the Mall

Well, I went to the Mall, as well as Best Buy yesterday. Best Buy was alright, though I got the new Peeping Tom Album, as well as the Beavis and BUTT-head Experience, and "Paid in Full" by Erik B. and Rakim.   Anyways, on to the mall.   I never really was a big fan of the mall. Too many goths and punk rock kids hang out there. I do like the memories of "Dawn of the Dead" that they invoke though.   I saw a group of Juggalos, aka Insane Clown Posse fans. Suprisingly, none of them were fat. They were being harrassed by mall security, most likely because the immense odor of their unbathed bodies was most likely causing mass illness, as well as making babies cry. I can't believe that there are still Juggalos. It's like the KISS Army, only more retarded. It's the lowest rung on the music fan ladder.   I went to the Suncoast store, and got a 6 DVD box set of zombie movies for $34.99 (that's a deal). I ended up watching one of them instead of Raw last night. While I was there, I saw a disturbing amount of Anime merchandise. I will admit, there are anime titles I like, but most of it's fans really embarrass me. It's sad that I can't wear my Cowboy Bebop shirt these days without getting funny looks, or having anime geeks flock around me. I did chat with a hot girl who liked anime though. She ended up leaving when I said I'm a huge horror geek. Oh well. Also, I got a kick ass Hong Kong Fooey t-shirt.   I went to Hot Topic, but only for a cool Adult Swim shirt. It's probably the worst place in the mall, playing shitty EBM and metal. Christ, I hate Cradle of Filth. Also, it was full of obnoxious goths (sadly, no hot goth chicks). Worst of all, there were no cool Adult Swim shirts, though there were plenty of Pirates of the Carrbiean shirts, and tons of Corpse Bride appearal, and other lame movie shirts. no horror movie shirts though. Oh, and the Juggalos that I mentioned earlier were there. There were loud and yes, they smelled horrible. Even the goths looked at them like "What a bunch of fags."   I left that shithole, and headed to FYE. I was only there for about 5 minutes though, because it was way too expensive (as usual). I'm not going to pay $19.99 for a CD.   And that was my adventure at the mall.
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

5
How To Vibrate
 

The Madcap Laughs

This entry is dedicated to late Pink Floyd founder Syd Barrett, who died last week. RIP Syd, you will always be missed.   Syd Barrett 1946-2006 RIP   And now, onto other things   -I got Edward Lee's "The Bighead" last Saturday, and so far, it's great, and really disgusting. So far, it has consumption of shit, piss, rape, inbred rednecks, a profane priest, a nymphomaniac, cannibalism, hardcore sex, a disgusting bit with a colostomy bag, murder, a newborn baby having it's head bashed in, a pair of evil perverted nuns from hell, and more. And I'm not even half way done. I'll get to a review of it when I'm done, though at this point, it looks like a review of Joe Lansdales zombie western "Dead in the West" won't be for a long while.   -I got Thom Yorke's "The Eraser" Yesterday, and it's great. A lot of glitchy techno, with gutiar and bass only appearing (seperatly) on two tracks. Felonies said it reminded him of recent Radiohead b-sides, and I agree-and think that it's a good thing. I dig glitchy, weirds techno.   -There's problems right now between Isreal and Hizbollah. Well, what's new? I'm sorry, but there's always been problems in the Middle East. There have been problems in the Middle East for God knows how long. So, what do I think? Well, we can't settle it with war, because we can't get in another war. At the same time though, we can't solve this diplomatically, because as the past has proven, there is no real diplomatic solution right now, or possibly even in the future.   -"Little Man" is the number 2 movie in America right now, and proves once again that the majority of movie goers today are idiots.   -"The Venture Brothers" and "Tom Goes To The Mayor" continue to kick ass on Adult Swim. That is all.   That's all for now. Next time: Your guess is as good as mine.
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

5
How To Vibrate
 

A trip to Wal-Mart

Note: if you are expecting a "Walmart is the scorn of America because it's an evil corperation and it ruins smaller ones" rant, then this is not the entry for you. Otherwise, enjoy   I went to Walmart last Tuesday. Normally, I only go there to get food, but other than that, I usually don't go there. Not because they"are trying to destroy the world" as some would want you to believe, but because other than the low prices, they just don't interest me. Oh, and because of the customers and workers.   Anywho, I decided that I need a new pair of headphones, so I asked where they are located. The girl I asked in the electronics looked at me for about fifteen seconds like I was an idiot. Now maybe I should have known where they were, but that's beyond the point. As I already said, I normally don't go to Walmart, so how the hell should I know where the headphones are in the electronics section? She eventually helped me, but still looked at me like I was retarded.   The people at the cash register aren't any better. They were either a.) old people who should be retired already or b.) lazy teenagers who have no clue how their jo works. I ended up getting the teen. It was some fat chick, who always seemed pissed off and was also rude, though not as bad as the girl that I mentioned earlier. Oh, and she was also fat. What is it about Walmart that seems to attract fat people?   Oh, and there is a reason that this place is called "white trash capital of the world": because it is dangerously filled with white trash. You know, unwashed, tattooed guys with horrendous mullets, and mothers who hit their children in public. Oh, and ladies, leave that shit at home. Hell, leave your kids at home. I don't need to hear you yelling at them and smacking them around in public. That's just disturbing.   So, what did I learn from all of this? I learned that next time I need headphones, I'll go to Radio Shack.
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

5
How To Vibrate
 

A Magic Carpet Ride To Hell

-Well, it's been a while, but I'm back. I've been busy with classes (Literary studies, Short Story Writing II, Poetry, II, and Wight Lifting-No, I've met nobody like wildpegasus). They've been fine, I guess. Met a cool guy who's a fellow horror fan, and writes on occasion, so that's pretty cool.   -Anyways, Hotbutter was banned again, this time using the allias "Dirty Killingsocks." He's like wildpegasus, only amusing and not pathetic.   -I recently saw the "Cast Your Dream Porno" thread, and all I can say is...wow. I don't mind seing a girl get fucked in the ass, but Double Anal is not for me. Neither is watersports, bestiality scat, rape play, or anything that's well...sick, though I've read my fare share of horror stories with that kind of shit. Also, I like porn as much as the next guy, and I can see someone buying or renting one, but why would anyone become a connoiseur of it? Besides, there porn everywhere on the net, so what's the point of owing one. Ok, I casn see someone owning something like "Debbie Does Dallas" for historical purposes, but still, what's the deal. It's not the 80's anymore, we don't need to rent porn, because it's right there, and sometimes it's free. But that's just my opinion.   In a nutshell, I like porn as much as the next guy, but I'm not exactly an enthusiast.   -I might watch Raw tonight, since I'm (mostly) done with homework, and I've got nothing else to do. There's really nothing else on.
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

5
How To Vibrate
 

Lenna's reign has ended.

May 29th, 2007: Leena's reign of terror ends.   I'm suprised this happened, to be honest. Sure, she's been banned before (and will probably return) but I'm suprised she lasted this long. She was a pain in the ass, and nobody but Matt Young liked her. She was a female version of MikeSC, only occasionaly funny, and also prone to start arguments. She also was incredibly insecure, with no known "friends" outside of myspace and this forum (some poeple actually liked her...God knows why.) She posted pictures of shit in WP threads, which was still less upsetting than WP. She pissed off Carlito Brigante, which was always funny.   And now she's gone.   I personally won't miss her. I stopped caring about her a long time ago. I did defend her once, but that was just to get to Oblivious Heel (who was that anyways?) So anything about her stopped interesting me.   So yeah, good riddence, or good bye, I guess.
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

5
How To Vibrate
 

The Internet is driving me crazy

In case you didn't know, the internet is where political debate and a personal opinion go to die. Now everywhere I go online, I hear bullshit like "OBAMA A SECRET MUSLIM" or "PALIN AN EVIL WOMAN!"   This is what politics has transformed into: a shouting match. Taunting each other. Puffing one's chest. Saying retarded things like "Barack Obama HUSSEIN!!!!" This is not political discussion or observation. This is childish bullshit. This has become The Justice League vs. The Legion of Doom for some people. How else would you explain the popularity of political blogs that say the same right wing and left wing talking points?   This is retarded. I do not want McCaine to be the next president.* I also wish people on both sides were better than this, and that dumb personal attacks, "our way or the high way" and "America: love it or leave it" bullshit didn't exist. But it does. Maybe it's because the internet has given retarded mouth breathers a voice that no one with a properly functioning brain would want to hear. People should be better than this, but they aren't. In a perfect world, we wouldn't have the likes of Michael Moore and Sean Hannity. It's not a eprfect world though.   In short, until you have something to say that's 1.) Not a talking point, 2.) Actually intelligent, 3.) Not a stupid personal attack on character that has nothing to with the issues, or 4.) Mature, then I don't want to hear it. Blow it out of your ass. People like this are what's ruining political discourse in this country. It has gotten to a point where disagreement leads to insults and shouting. Come on, you can be better than that.     *I do however, want to fuck Palin's brains out.
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

5
How To Vibrate
 

ROLLING STONE GAVE CHINESE DEMOCRACY 4 OUT OF 5 STARS!!!!

IT WILL OBVIOUSLY BE GREAT!!!!!!   Yeah, well they also gave St Anger 4 stars, as well as 50 Cent's The Massacre, Emiem's Encore, and several other shitty albums. 4 stars from Rolling Stone don't mean shit. Oh, and they gave Mick Jagger's Goddess on the Doorway 5 stars-no solo Mick Jagger solo album is good ,you out of touch cocksuckers.   Also, quit fooling yourselves: this is not Guns N' Roses. Yeah, it's called Guns N' Roses, but it's not, ok people. It's just Axl Rose (and his enormous ego's) solo project. Nothing more, nothing less. Oh, and it's pretty unlikely it will live up to all the hype.   Don't agree? Tough shit. Quit sucking the guy's cock and face the facts. Unless you forgot The Spagghetti Incident.
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

5
How To Vibrate
 

A message to Chazz

Look, just wanted to let you know that you aren't threatening or imposing in any way, shape, or form, that you are terrible at comebacks (seriously, "Your Mom" jokes?) and insults (LOL OBAMA SOUNDS LIKE OSAMA, SO I'LL CALL HIM OSAMA!!! AREN'T I CLEVER), and that you are annoying if anything. So yeah, you should shut the fuck up.
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

5
How To Vibrate
 

The End of EHME

Febuary 10th, 2009. The day EHME was put to rest (banned)   Granted, this banning was a long time coming. The man had been skirting the edges since 2006. People were calling for his banning then, and they were recently. His entire tough guy act was terrible-he couldn't even do that right. Everything about the man was annoying.   His constant homophobia, drunken (and sometimes coked up) antics that were more tiresome than interesting (he couldn't even do drunk posting right), terrible attempts at starting fights with others, threats of violence towards other posters, cliched tough guy dialogue (fuck you, bitch, fag, faggot, etc), impregnating a woman (and gloating about it-seriously, who the fuck does that? It's amazing protective services haven't taken the kid away yet), horrible attempts at humor (saying your only kidding when threatening posters is no excuse for sucking you dumb fuck), and general attitude served as nothing but a detriment to the board. At times, he was so horrible, he actually made me long for the days of the likes of CronoT.   Now he's gone. Or at least until Mike unbans him and pisses everyone off for being a dolt.   Will he be missed? Fat chance. Every message board has it's EHME. Hell, we have a terrible poster or two or more banned every year. It's just that this one was two or three years too late. In the end, nobody will miss him or his antics. He had enough chances already, and today was the last one. He finally blew it. Sure, there are other terrible posters here, but there was only one EHME on this board. And one was enough. He wasn't the worst poster we've had (that prize goes to either MikeSC or wildpegasus), but he was undoubtably one of the worst.   So good riddence.
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

5
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