Review: Random Thoughts from 1-23-08, featuring RAW and ECW.
This is just a RAW and ECW column. So, you've been warned. RAW is from Hampton, VA.
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The new video wall is Fantastic. I purposefully capitalized that.
And our first match is Shawn Michaels vs. Mr. Kennedy.
- Kennedy hasn't been doing his entrance with the microphone recently. I wonder why? I watched the whole show much later than when it occured, so times are going to be there, and sometimes not there.
- When Kennedy couldn't bridge out of the pinning move into a backslide, I thought that was great, as was HBK's somersault pescado. I loved the finish, which constituted HBK going for that reverse figure-four, and getting kicked off. Then HBK kipped up, and hit Kennedy with SWEET CHIN MUSIC at 11:57 (shown) for the victory. ***. This was probably as good as a match between these two could get.
Randy Orton's with Vince McMahon, who's giving him reasons to shake hands with Jeff Hardy tonight, cause they're supposed to shake hands and all.
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The next match was Mickie James vs. Beth Phoenix for the Women's Title.
- Beth finishes with a fisherman's buster at 3:42. I didn't really care, *1/2.
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Todd Grisham is with HHH, who talks about Vince in HD. Mostly about how old he's gonna look, and then, he talks about the Rumble.
After, Brian Kendrick is with Cody Rhodes. Kendrick has to qualify for the Rumble tonight, and Hardcore Holly comes bustin' in, talking about how he'll get rid of anyone, including Rhodes, to win the Royal Rumble.
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So, the next match is the Highlanders vs. Finlay and Hornswoggle.
- What are the Highlanders, super jobbers? Anyway, Hornswoggle gets the pin after a frog splash. *.
And now Chris Jericho comes out, with great pyro, to talk about JBL. He says he'll fight him, to little fanfare. His return has been a disaster.
Vince is now with Jeff Hardy, telling him to never risk someone's life like he did last week.
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Brian Kendrick's Royal Rumble Qualifying Match is against.....UMAGA. Harharhar.
- Yes, I really laughed when I heard William Regal announce that Kendrick was facing UMAGA. This was a super squash, ending with the SAMOAN SPIKE at 2:20. **.
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Mickie James is backstage with Maria, and sad that she can't beat Phoenix. She leaves, and Ashley comes into the picture, talking about a party at the Playboy Mansion. And then, Santino Marella came in and said something so funny that I didn't even write it down.
And why is Big Pussy on Celebrity Apprentice?
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Hardcore Holly w/Cody Rhodes is facing Carlito w/Maria and Santino in a singles match, now.
- Why did Carlito stick around, again? He's been buried so far down on the card that he'll be a Heat regular by WrestleMania. I don't have HD, but even I can see how old Holly's looking. Santino distracts Holly during an Alabama Slam attempt, so Carlito gives him a BACKSTABBER for the win at 3:11. That's one of my favorite finishing moves, but the match was a mess. 1/2*.
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Now, we have HHH's match vs. a mystery opponent. His new entrance setup is the best of all of them. No time, given that I'm watching this via...nefarious means. It's a over-the-top gauntlet match, and his first opponent is Snitsky. Once this was announced as a gauntlet, I knew he'd be in it. What a terrible payoff to a terrible angle. Why'd I expect more? Moving on, HHH throws Snitsky out. And HHH's second opponent is Mark Henry. Uh, brand extension? Henry charges at HHH after a while, but HHH pulls down the top rope, eliminating him. Last is...an IRATE William Regal, who gets destroyed by HHH and tossed out. I guess this whole angle was just for the sole purpose of HHH putting himself over three guys. 1/2*.
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The last segment on this show was the scheduled handshake between Jeff Hardy and Randy Orton. Orton says that he respects Hardy, but Hardy says the exact opposite. He says that there's a lot of people whose hands he'll shake before Orton's. First, Jim Ross, second, Jerry Lawler, and third, Lillian Garcia. Then Hardy goes into the crowd, and shakes a bunch of people's hands. When Hardy gets back in the ring, he gives Orton a TWIST OF FATE. Well, Orton's definitely going over, because Hardy's had the better of him the last two weeks. If Hardy won, Orton would look awful.
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Show was...decent, the best segment was HBK/Kennedy, and the worst was that HHH gauntlet trash.
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Last night, I watched ECW, from, well, 1/21/08. This show took place at the University of Virginia in Charlottesville. I like that all the shows use the same set, it makes things look, uh, more important.
The first contest was an Over the Top Rope Challenge, between Kane, The Miz, John Morrison, Tommy Dreamer, and Shelton Benjamin.
- Well, I know who's winning this. Dreamer's looking fat, which bothers me. I don't like seeing guys I grew up watching age.
Order of Elimination: Dreamer by Kane at 1:00, Miz and Morrison by Kane and Shelton at 2:58, and Kane by Shelton at 3:01. Shelton skinned the cat and headscissored Kane out, to win. Cool. I was wrong. And THERE AIN'T NO STOPPIN' ME NUUUHHH. Kinda hard to rate that, but I'll go a bit less than **, with a *3/4.
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We get that Best Body Contest I was awaiting so much...at least they did it when I had to use the restroom. I missed most of it, but I saw Coach dancing to the music as I went out. And Kelly Kelly won. Wow. There are nowhere near as many kids in the crowd this week, it feels like RAW.
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Next was Kofi Kingston's debut, against a jobber named David Owen. Kofi's tracksuit is cool.
- That jobber did everything in his power to make Kingston look like shit. He succeeded. Kofi hits him with a really bad looking kick (because his opponent was standing so close to him) at 3:15 for the pinfall. DUD. That was not good.
Edge is with Chavo Guerrero in the back, because Chavo gets his title shot tonight. Soon Vickie Guerrero comes into the picture, cause it's Chavo's night. After, we get a GREAT Royal Rumble video, with facts and figures about the match. That may have been the best part of the show, thus far.
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The white kid is with Tazz again. He's facing the GREAT KHALI this week. About time. Khali gives him the HEAD CRUSH, for the win at 0:37. It's not getting so old, I suppose, but there aren't many other guys to feed him to. Umaga and Snitsky...that's about it, I think. *.
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And now, we have Chavo Guerrero vs. CM Punk in a...NO DISQUALIFICATION MATCH for the ECW Championship. Well, that stipulation was a surprise, but not really.
- Edge is on commentary. I know where this is going. And I don't like it at all. Punk tries to get rough first, by pulling the turnbuckle pad off, although nothing comes of it...yet.
- The crowd is a little mild, but this time, Chavo gets heat. Punk drops Chavo on the exposed turnbuckle, and gives Chavo the GTS. Edge runs into the ring (fuck, not this shit) and gives Punk a SPEAR, which after a LONG period of Chavo lying around, gets Chavo the 3 count and ECW Title at 7:05. Oh, fuck that. *1/2. Well, there's no reason to watch this show anymore, but I will anyway. The Edgeheads bring Vickie down, and they all celebrate. Could they have made Chavo look worse? I'm glad Chavo got a push, but this is more like a bump. He hasn't done anything noteable at all. Awful. Awful. Awful. This match was MUCH worse than their others, as well, *1/2. Hopefully they bump this show up to being taped before Smackdown, because I can't see the people staying in the building to watch Chavo freakin' Guerrero. Just my .02. Nothing good can come of this for Punk, because he's not going to be put over Edge in the LEAST.
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Show was BAD, best segment was...Shelton winning the Over the Top Rope Challenge, and the worst was obviously that AWFUL title change. Horrid booking.
I'll have a CYBER SUNDAY review up on Friday. Or not until Saturday or Sunday. Haven't made up my mind.
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