Review: Random Thoughts from 2/9/08, featuring a Boston Garden house show from the 80's, an original ECW show, and Smackdown.
I usually don't do the house shows unless something really catches my eye, and in this case, something did. You'll see what it was, later. So yeah, 9-6-86 show from the Boston Garden.
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So, our first match from Boston is a fantastic singles competition between Sivi Afi and Pete Doherty.
- Jobberific! Gorilla says something about how Afi wanted to be called "Toma" now...I believe this indicates that Afi was going to be the second Islander, as Haku's partner. If anything, it's a rough draft, so to speak.
- Afi's matches are usually paced well, but not this one, because Doherty has quite a few years on his body, to say the least. Afi gives him a crossbody off the top at 7:02, and that gives him the victory via pinfall. *1/4. The rating is self explanatory.
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This is one of the reasons I watched the show, but not THE reason. Yes, it's the Hart Foundation vs. the US Express.
- I suppose I'll never understand why Rotunda's name always changed to Rotundo, and vice versa. I don't think I could ever get used to the Hart Foundation not wearing pink and black. Black and turquoise here...
- Bret botched a leapfrog over Spivey in the middle of the match, because Spivey is so tall. I laughed. The Express sorta play heel, but because they represent the US, the crowd never boos them, you see. At around 10 minutes, I was pretty sure that this was going to be a 20 minute draw. It was a 20 minute draw after the bell rang at 18:32, but my favorite part of the match was the extremely long chase around the ring sequence. Spivey chased both members of the Hart Foundation in succession for about 30 seconds each. **1/2. The crowd didn't really care all that much.
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Although I know that George Steele is the guy facing Macho Man Randy Savage w/Elizabeth for the Intercontinental Title, this is the reason I watched the show. I never can get enough of watching Savage.
- Steele attacks Savage at the start with...a BODYSLAM! Wow, Steele did an actual wrestling move. Savage hits Steele multiple times with a foreign object that he had hidden in his tights, and I loved it. Talk about a blind ref, he didn't even notice.
- They be brawlin', until Savage gets hit with a chair by Steele at...no time. I don't even think the bell sounded to start the match. Obviously, Steele gets disqualified. Savage runs backstage, and while Steele celebrates, Savage attacks him. Steele comes back, and Savage runs backstage, only to come back again and be thwarted in his attack by Steele. *1/2, which is saying a lot in regards to a Steele match. Steele brings a few kids in the ring, and they eat turnbuckles with him. How nice.
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Rene Goulet vs. Pedro Morales is....
Whoops, I believe I accidentally hit the fast forward button on my remote control.
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Our next match is King Kong Bundy and Big John Studd w/Bobby Heenan vs. The Machines. Big and Super are the two Machines taking part in this match.
- Big Machine is played by Blackjack Mulligan, and Super Machine is played by Bill Eadie, who most would know as Demolition Ax. There you have it.
- Hosstastic! There's a lot of beef in the ring. Heenan comes on commentary...lots of trash is being thrown at Bundy and Studd, throughout the match. It gets worse when Studd and Bundy argue, and even worse than that when Heenan breaks up a pin attempt on Studd, getting his team DQ'd at 9:06. Brain grabs a microphone, and wants the Machines to get a partner for next month. Oh yeah, son! *3/4.
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Seeing as Heenan got all upset, he won't be accompaning KING Harley Race for his match against Corporal Kirchner.
- This show is pretty star-studded. The guy in the front row has two fingers for Kirchner. Guess which ones.
- This is a strange matchup, to put it nicely. The match is a showcase of all Harley's signature moves and bumps, so I enjoyed it. It's a little too long, though, as evidenced by the bored crowd. Kirchner comes off the rope with a crossbody, but Race reverses it, getting the win at 13:46. **. Such an overused finish in the 80's, but I rarely see it now. Not sure if that's good or bad, but everything now is hit your finisher (or multiple finisher sequence), pin. Throw in some variation, please.
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Cowboy Bob Orton is facing a hillbilly, thankfully, it's the one that can wrestle a little, Cousin Luke.
- Orton is Adrian Adonis' bodyguard at this time, which explains his pink hat that he wore to the ring. There's a gigantic boring chant, so this ended quickly. Figured. Luke charged into an Orton knee, and got pinned at 4:12. 1/2*. With Luke's buddies, this could've been terrible.
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Our main event is Nikolai Volkoff and The Iron Sheik w/Slick vs. The British Bulldogs, for the WWF Tag Team Titles.
- Volkoff's rendition of the Russian national anthem always gets big heel heat. There's only been two dead wrestlers on the show. I was taken aback by that, because most of the time when watching these old shows, I think about how so many wrestlers that I used to watch have died.
- Gorilla Monsoon talked with Slick during a part of the match, and said that Slick had big lips. Ok, Gorilla didn't really say that. He said he'd give him bigger lips than the ones he already has if he didn't shut it.
- The scroll in the scoreboard area at Boston Garden says that it'll be PIPER MACHINE teaming up with the Machines against Heenan, Bundy and Studd next month. I figured they'd give it away to sell tickets. Bulldog rolls Sheik up at the end of an underwhelming match, the cradle gets reversed twice by Dynamite and once by Volkoff, but it still gives the British Bulldogs the win at 10:57. **. Sheik and Davey were on the canvas for about a 30 count. For real. That's the end of the show, obviously.
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Show was, eh, good. For a house show, your standards have to be lowered. You just have to be glad to see a good collection of talent in competitive matches. We had that here, so its good. I try to take the perspective of a fan that paid good money for a ticket with house shows. Best match was the Hart Foundation vs. the US Express, and the worst was probably Rene Goulet vs. Pedro Morales. The worst I watched was Bob Orton vs. Cousin Luke.
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ECW from 2/18/96 was next...this show was a jumbled mess, albeit fun, so my typing is going to look like a jumbled mess too.
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Missy Hyatt and Sandman talked about masturbation with Sandman's singapore cane at the beginning of the show, which somehow segued into a 6 man tag, as the Bad Crew took on Dino Sendoff, the Dirtbike Kid and Don E. Allen.
The crowd SHIT all over it. The Bad Crew squashed these guys, and Sandman came in after the match, to cane all of them. The audience liked that.
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Intro to the show and all that, as Joey Styles is in the ring. The lights go off...and it's BRIAN FUCKING PILLMAN, who appears in the middle of the ring ! Sign Guy has a sign that says, "don't work me!" That was great. Obviously, this is the scene of his insane promo. I'll just post it.
My favorite part was when Shane said, "he's shooting!" See, those words, for me anyway, have become synonymous with WCW, so to hear them here reminded me of Shane Douglas in WCW 2000.
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Joey Styles hypes Taz as being a real loose cannon, so Bill Alfonso has to start talkin', on this little video. I love him. He rambled the whole time..."I'm eating steak!"
The Gangstas were supposed to face The Headhunters on this show, but New Jack found himself in jail. Excuse me for a second. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. Anyway, the Headhunters beat on Mustafa Saed.
Now we get to the Headhunters match, and they're taking on the surprise team of...the BRUISE BROTHERS. Oh no. Tommy Dreamer had brought them in for the night, Joey says. More on that later.
- Yeah, they were facing a surprise team. I guess when they meant surprise, they meant it in the worst way. The Bruise Brothers are the Harris Brothers, in case you didn't know.
- It's a brawl, but you couldn't see anything for a good sized portion of what was shown. Is that a good thing? I think so. One of the Harris Brothers pinned a Headhunter, and a Headhunter pinned a Harris, at the same time. But the Harris Brothers won, as their pin was the one that was counted.
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We get the marcea hatt omves lal runoda with Lance Wright, and then, clips from Stevie Richards and the Eliminators vs. The Pitbulls and Francine in a Dog Collar Match. There's really nothing of importance, except for a few Super Bombs. We moved forward, and as the Eliminators were choking out the Pitbulls with their chains, Francine pinned Stevie for a 3 count. For that, everyone was Totally Eliminated after the match. That's the price you pay.
The Eliminators cut a promo, and show us a video of many of their TOTAL ELIMINATIONS.
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Buh Buh Ray Dudley faces Mr. Hughes right now...I never got the whole Mr. Hughes thing. Big Dick Dudley wouldn't allow Hughes to beat on Buh Buh, so he kicks Hughes' ass, and Buh Buh gives Hughes a big splash off the top for the 3 count after about 30 seconds. DUD.
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Joey Styles is with Tommy Dreamer....but here comes Raven. Raven talks about what happens to liars in other countries, and since Tommy got Beulah pregnant, he insinuates that he'll cut Tommy's dick off. The Harris Brothers and Shane Douglas come to the ring at the sound of that, and Tommy asks Shane to get Beulah out of here. When Shane's gone, the Harris Brothers attack Tommy and ram him dick-first into the ringpost, over and over. Remember, the Harris Brothers were supposed to be Tommy's friends. That's the end of the show.
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Next time, I'll just write a paragraph or two about the ECW show. It was all over the place. I can't even rate it.
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Last, I watched Smackdown, from Corpus Christi.
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The first segment is a repeat of Monday. You know, how all 6 participants in the Elimination Chamber came to the ring and cut promos, but this one ended as Taker appeared in the ring after the lights were turned out. Also, we get a 6 man tag tonight, just like on RAW. USE DIFFERENT IDEAS.
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The first match on the show was a rematch from ECW last week, Shelton Benjamin vs. Kane.
- Before the match, THERE AIN'T NO STOPPIN' ME NUUUH
- Kane gets a LOT of offense. After knocking Shelton back into the ring from the outside, Kane gets counted out, at 6:02. *1/2. Kane getting all that offense wasn't necessarily a good thing.
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Chuck Palumbo faced Jamie Noble w/Michelle McCool next....
- Too much punch, kick. Noble flew off the top to the outside and landed on Chuck's bike, so Chuck tossed Noble into the ring and finished him off at 3:56. *.
After the match, Chuck whipped Noble's ass. The only bad thing about this angle is that I don't necessarily buy Chuck as a guy who has the "whoop ass mentality." Chuck was going to run Noble over with his motorcycle, but he didn't. He should've.
WWE did some positive stuff in China, because they have an office there. This was one of those, "we're a company who cares about the people" pieces.
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The next match was a tag team match, featuring Jesse and Festus who were taking on Deuce & Domino w/Cherry.
- Is Festus supposed to be a retard? Anyway, the ringbell rang and he went nuts. The match finished with after a flapjack variation by Festus at 4:00. 3/4*, that gimmick is AWFUL.
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Edge has his interview segment up next, that being the CUTTING EDGE, and his guest is Vickie Guerrero. Edge says he has a surprise for her on Valentine's Day, but what he really wants is for Rey Mysterio to come out and apologize to her for accidentally giving her a 619 at the Rumble. Rey comes out, and tries to explain himself, but gets slapped twice by Vickie. Edge attacks Rey, and grabs two chairs from outside of the ring. Rey kicks one into his face, and gives him a 619. Edge goes out of the ring, but Rey jumps onto him, ending their little spat. Rey tells Vickie he's sorry, and leaves.
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This new interviewer is with Edge, and asks him if he's going to propose to Vickie Guerrero next week. He says that it isn't any of her business.
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Shannon Moore and Jimmy Wang Yang are set to take on the Edgeheads...
- Just kill me now. I hate Yang's stupid dance.
- At one moment, I thought Yang had hurt his wrist, but really, he just sold it very well. Curt Hawkins pinned Shannon Moore after a curtain call at 3:31. *1/4. Glad to see Moore and Yang lose.
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Time for the main event, that being The Great Khali, MVP and Big Daddy V vs. Batista, the Undertaker, and Finlay.
- There's a commercial break after the entrances, and when we come back,the match is on. I really want to know who thought it was a good idea to repeat booking on both brands. I also want to know if anyone thinks the Elimination Chamber with these six will be any good.
- There's really no other way to put it, except that this is awful. You have two guys who only do good work with each other, and they're on the same team. You have two that cannot wrestle, one whose age is seemingly beginning to affect his in-ring work, and the last one is too small for his heat segment work with Taker to be believable. After 14:26 of DOGSHIT, Finlay hits Khali with the shillelagh, getting himself disqualified. The babyfaces tease dissension, and that ends the show. DUD.
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First hour was good, second was probably the worst TV I've seen from WWE in the last month and a half. Show was TERRIBLE. Now that I've finally called a show terrible, I can explain how I rate shows like that. For PPV's, it takes two negative star matches, and nothing over ****. For TV shows, it takes nothing over *1/2, and at least one DUD, plus uninteresting angles, like the Edge/Vickie and Jesse/Festus stuff. Best segment was...Chuck Palumbo's beatdown of Jamie Noble, and the worst was easily the awful six man tag which ended the show.
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The Savage and Liz Coliseum Video review will be up sometime tomorrow. I almost forgot. Entry #100. Yay.
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