7 p.m.

• So this week I finally said goodbye to an old friend from my college days. And good fucking riddance. For those that experienced the ol’ university system, or for those that are currently going through this ordeal, you undoubtedly had a buddy or two that would freeload off of you and your other pals.

Well I finally said “No, Mooch” to my very own version. Every month or so this bastard would pop up and ask for some money. Sure giving him some cash every now and then didn’t break my budget, but Jesus Christ – get a job!

Who was this friend?

My school loan.

After paying off the better half’s credit card debt we spent the next year or so building up a decent rainy day fund. The next step was to put away enough money to pay off the car and my school loan. At the time there were about six payments left on the car, and by the time the final payment would be made there would also be enough cash saved up to pay off the school loan. Of course, the car was ONE PAYMENT away from being paid off when all hell broke loose (another entry for another time), so a car payment is back on the slate. However, I was hell-bent on getting rid of this goddamn school loan by the end of this year. I guess it makes matters worse considering I loathe my alma mater. I went to a community college for two years post-high school while I figured out what I wanted to do with my life. After two years I took my credits and transferred to a local school that I thought would provide a good education.

Boy was I wrong.

After about a year I realized what a terrible decision I made. Now was time to make a choice: Stick it out for another year-and-a-half or transfer to some other cesspool and spend even more money getting a piece of paper that’s tucked away somewhere in my house, either in a storage closet or the fruit cellar. (Yeah, I keep a bunch of queers in my basement.)

Once I graduated it was time to make those monthly payments. I never paid them any mind; I simply made the monthly payment. After I while when my degree was proving worthless in my search for gainful employment I began to get pissed at having to pay $109.47 each month to a place that I loathed to attend.

Not any more. Thanks to a one-time $5,100 payment.

Now I won’t have to see that monthly bill any more, reminding me of those two-and-a-half years of shit I went through. Boo-hoo. (Those nights leaving the Quickie-Mart at 2 a.m. only to get on a bus five hours later to attend an 8 a.m. class were especially fun.) But now the only reminders I have of that shit hole of an institution are when they send me alumni updates asking me for more money. I’m still waiting for the day when some poor student calls me during an alumni donation drive.