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2/13: Hunting And Glass Ceiling Victims

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kkktookmybabyaway

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• Well, I didn't win the Powerball jackpot, but I did learn something today. This one psycho bitch I work with is playing the lottery, but she is doing it herself and not taking part in the office pool. Now I want to win this thing more than ever.

 

• Say, did you all know that not only has Dick Cheney worked at Halliburton but also he shot some guy while hunting quail? Gee, I knew Dan wasn’t one of the best vice presidents out there, but did he really deserve to get shot for misspelling potato? Lolz. I guess the place where Cheney was hunting at ran out of young black males or something. Lolz2. I guess now he finally knows what it’s like to shoot another person, seeing how he skipped out on doing it in Vietnam. Lolz3. Quail? They should have been hunting "duck." Lolz4. The guy he shot was a lawyer, so it's not all that bad. Lolz5 Well, that covers what the late-night talk shows are going to talk about tonight. You heard ‘em here first, folks.

 

Maybe Hitlery will go with Cheney on his next hunting trip. No, that wasn't a joke. I really hope she does accompany him.

 

Anyway, I was listening to Hannity’s show on the way home, and for the first time in a while it was actually somewhat interesting. Well, at least the part where he played the audio of what reporters were asking the White House press guy. While there were some funny ones like “Will he resign over this?” and one reporter comparing the delayed announcement to the Katrina relief efforts, my personal favorite was “Would it have been more serious if the person he shot died?”

 

• Oh, and it appears that vice presidents aren’t the only ones who have hunting accidents.

 

• Well we now know the terrorists are Republican. Maybe their next stop will be ACLU headquarters.

 

• I finally got around to watching the “Wedding Crashers” yesterday. Eh. Comedies are tough for me to judge because I consider many of them to be unfunny. Comedy is a hard art to master, and it is so subjective. There were a few moments that got a chuckle out of me (Vince Vaughn's "quail hunting" bit now seems a little erie, given what just happened to Cheney), but did it have to be more than TWO HOURS long? Christ almighty, couldn’t they have wrapped up the story while at that post-wedding weekend retreat? I’m almost afraid to see the “UNCORKED” version, which will be painfully longer. I was also kind of disappointed the theatrical version didn’t include some “wedding crashers” at the end wedding.

 

• So Bonnie Bernstein has left the CBS’ NFL coverage because she has hit the glass ceiling in regards to her football reporting/announcing career. Good. I despise female sideline reporters, and Bonnie was no exception. Now give the job to some ex-player who can’t properly pronounce half the words he’s saying. Oh, and if there are any ideas to have Terry Bradshaw host Fox's NFL Pre-Game show in place of the departing James Brown, please scrap them now for the love of God.

 

• You know, I think I might like ESPN's Monday Night Football crew, what with Tirico being a perv and Kornheiser not being a total yes-man. All we need now is Joe Namath to replace Joe Theismann and bring Suzy Kolber up to the booth, and I'd watch this foursome even if the game they're announcing is the Cardinals at the 49ers.

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Because I know you "don't read any of that stuff," here is what I was talking about:

 

Did you know: Tirico and Kornheiser each have been suspended at one time during their careers with ESPN. Tirico was suspended for three months in 1993 after several women accused him of making unwanted sexual advances. Kornheiser was suspended for one week in 2002 for making critical comments about ESPN off-air during his radio show.

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damn, no more Bonnie to look at on Sundays.

 

I didn't know James Brown was leaving Fox NFL Sunday...how bout that...

 

I haven't seen Wedding Crashers yet, not in any real hurry...I DID see 40 Year Old Virgin and I just didn't get the hype surrounding it...I thought it was OKAY, nothing great. I'm not really huge on comedies anyway. Comedies these days have nothing on the old classics from our younger 80s days...movies like Breakfast Club, Spaceballs, Airplane, Planes, Trains and Automobiles and Three Amigos get more run on my DVD player than shit these days. Today's comedies all tend to follow that "Something About Mary" Farrelly Brother formula of over-the-top silliness rather than a cleverly written script.

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The 40-Year Old Virgin wasn't as bad as I thought it would be, but that was another one that went way too long. For some reason, when I was watching "Virgin" I was thinking it was like the "Office Space" of date movies, only not as funny.

 

"Why should I have to change my name (to Michael Bolton)? He's the one who sucks."

 

And as a kid I didn't like a lot of those movies you listed, Lushus, but now that I watch them I laugh. Another one I'd add to that list for me was "Uncle Buck."

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