Livin' The Blues
The Path I Chose, I had to Follow
If there is no road, there is no tommorow
Hold On, Hold On for as you long as you can see
It doesn't matter, nothing matters for it's only make-believe now...
I can't even begin to explain how much I regret the decisions I made throughout my life and that's expected. You can't show me one person who did everything right from the start. I do, however feel like I am way behind where I should be. I'm 20 years old and I lost almost 1 and 1/2 years on my life by waiting until I went to college and once I got here, I haven't really gotten anywhere. I still feel stuck as the same 18 year old I was, the day I grabbed that diploma from Dr. Carter (my HS principal, who I hear is dying of cancer...which is a shame. He was one of the very few good ones).
I see my friends, already changing things. Some for the best and some for the worse, but change nontheless. I can't change, beyond my haircut. Fuck, I even have the same fucking wardrobe as I did 2 years ago.
Every time, I think I got the urge to get the fuck up...something always comes to me and brings it back down and I can't remember how things got to be this way.
It used to seem that there was always something to make you happy and get you through the days...I had a really, really good month in January. It's always been a running theme in my life...I start the years off in a incredible fashion and it derails sometime around labor day into a complete mess.
Then, somehow it fixes itself up and disappears and I get another brief glimpse at the concept of happiness...
Oh, the girl from the other day? She's giving us another creature into this world.
Lesson: Don't have drunk sex.
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