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Doesn't Barry's ball buy a sports car?

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Swift Terror

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Whatever happened to the word "doesn't"? Nobody says this word anymore. These days, it's all about "dudn't". I hear professional broadcasters on the radio say "dudn't" all the time. Even the freakin president has used it, although in his case it is not that shocking when you hear his other syntaxtical malformations. Is the word "dudn't" a reflection of our need to speed everything up? It seems "dudn't" is a quicker way to say "doesn't". Also, some people avoid "doesn't" because it sounds pretentious, like you're some jackass trying to sound educated.

 

"Hey, do you believe this idiot on TV, look at him"!

 

"Dudn't bother me."

 

 

 

 

Barry Bonds hit home run No. 715, surpassing the legendary Babe Ruth. Don't care, I'm more interested in the fan who caught the now famous ball. He was standing in line for some peanuts and a beer while Bonds came up to bat and the ball pretty much just fell into his hand. I LOVE this. The dude doesn't even stay in his seat to see the at-bat and winds up with I guess a ball that is worth a few hundred grand. I happened to see Hank Aaron hit No. 714 in Cincinnati. My aunt was in the lady's room. And I might just have to start liking Bonds after he made the comment that he hopes the guy sells the ball and makes as much money as he can get.

 

 

 

 

 

And now, a brand new segment on Triple Black. The weekly Top Gear car review!!

 

I mentioned the British TV show Top Gear in a previous post. It's a great show, very well produced. The only thing I don't like about it is the insessant America-bashing. I mean these guys go way out of their way to rip on the USA. Yet I still watch, because when it comes to cars, the hosts and I are on the same page.

 

So without further ado, here is the car review, plus a bonus review in celebration of the first segment ever.

 

 

 

1) 2006 Corvette Z06

 

 

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This is the high performance version of the normal Corvette. Jeremy Clarkson did the review and like with all things American, in a real shocker, he didn't like it. Oh, he admitted it was very fast, but he objected to the cheap interior and the little bugs that went wrong. He also said it would be horrible as a daily driver because it was so uncomfortable. Now, if you can afford the $70,000 price tag, I'm sure you can mix in a Camry to drive to work. But, that's Clarkson for you. And of course the interior doesn't have the high quality of a Ferrari or Aston Martin--it's 10s of thousands of dollars LESS than those 6-figure cars. He did however express astonishment over a car that is the equal (in terms of speed) of a $160,000 Ferrari can be bought for Chevrolet's price. So basically he loved it as a track car but did not recommend it for driving on the road.

 

 

 

2) 2007 Jaguar XK

 

 

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Clarkson tested this completely redesigned model as well, and loved it...as long as one kept the car under 130 mph. He noticed a significant front end lift and lightness in the steering at speeds over 130. Not safe at all. This is due to the poorly designed rear spoiler, which causes too much downforce at the rear of the car, with no compensation at the front. He also criticized the antenna (looks like it came from a 1981 Ford) the lack of a new engine (same engine as the old model) and the lack of any new gadgets in the interior. He did however love the styling, and it is a truly gorgeous car. At one point he said he was torn on whether to drive it or to get an easel and start painting it. And while he bitched about the interior gadgetry, he did like the restyling of it, felt it was modern and crisp, all the old school wood trimming gone. Bottom line, he loved driving it and could put up with the nitpicking.

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No way you're doing this feature on a regular basis.

 

And fuck Barry Bonds. I hope this guy destroys the ball. And admit it, if you were with Lisa at the time and she told you to get her tampons from the nearby store, you would have been standing in the store's snack aisle when Hank hit 714.

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