Retard Girl

No you just pick up TagiaStar lookin bitches on Pro Wrestling forums... That makes you worse, loser. hey now, out of the one and a half people i've 'pcked up' off this board, he is not one of them.

another thing with finishers... if someone else uses your finisher, he never gets the pin. especially if someone's finisher is something like a DDT.

pretty much visited every state on the Eastern seaboard, down to Gorgia. been to Canada a couple times, once to Niagra/Toronto and once to Montreal. then we vacationed once to Vegas and southern Cali, where we spent half a day in Tijuana. i can't say which was shittest. camping a few years ago in Maine sucked because it poured every fucking day.

and they get pins with moves other than their finisher.

i can whistle, but badly. and i could never figure out how people do that two-fingers-in-the-mouth whistle.

i loved the "USA!" chants that Mohammed Hassan would get XD

also, has ringing the bell over and over ever stopped a post-match beatdown?

when someone on TV turns heel, their music slows down.

i wish i knew edit:

i'm pagan like how most Catholics are... just for the holidays.

that was beautiful, maaaan.

*is pagan*

bottom left corner.

whoever sets up the gimmick (table, chairs, ladders, glass, lightubes, barbed wire whatever, in any combination) ends up being the one getting thrown through it.

holy fuck, the resemblance is astonishing. too bad i can't grow a nifty goatee like that

he was in last year's TPI.

bob_barron

it's over now.

Cassandro.

but in reality, would someone the size of Taiga win against someone the size of Bruner without resorting to cheating, double teaming, etc? unless my character started taking steroids and got leg implants to make her taller edit: i really liked WC's match. good stuff. i don't want to seem bitter.

good idea... Mak Francis has to speak loudly over the cheering of the hot Memphis crowd. "Welcome back to A Side Effect of Global Warming!" "What 'warming'? It's freezing out there, even here in the Deep South!" Suicide King complains. "Well, that's the side effect!!" "That makes no sense Mak! How does global warming make it colder, Einstein?" Mak actually thinks it over for a few moments before remembering there's a wrestling show going on around them. "Enough about that King, what about this upcoming matchup? Our cruiserweight champion, Taiga Star, is taking on her biggest challenge to date in Big Bully Bruner." Mak shuffles through some papers. "We don't have a Tale of the Tape up here, but it's a safe bet that Bruner is twice her size." Suicide King turns to his broadcast partner. "I know he's twice as big heightwise, but I'm not sure about the weight." "King!" "What? I'm only pointing this out. Are they sure she makes weight for the Cruiserweight division?...." Suicide King is cut off by the opening beats of 'Call the Ambulance' and Funyon making the introductions. "Ladies and Gentlemen, the following contest is scheduled for one-fall! The referee for this contest is Brian Warner and the Cruiserweight title is not on the line." Obviously. "Introducing first, he hails from the Bedford-Stuyvesant section of Brooklyn, NEW YORK! Weighing in at four hundred fifty-five pounds, he is accompanied to the ring by Sir Marvelous... He is the Big Bully... TRACEYYY BRUUU-NERR!" Bruner and Sir Marvelous emerge from the curtain, both dressed in impeccable designer suits. Bruner's fedora lays low over his eyes, his sunglasses reflect the flashing lights coldly. He practically struts to the ring, taking his sweet time with it; partly to look like a bad-ass, partly to be a prick, and partly so that Marvelous can keep up. Sir Marvelous is looking, well, marvelous, as always. The lights shine off his freshly waxed head; his charcoal grey pinstripe suit is offset by a classy red shirt with a matching tie. Bruner climbs the ring steps and enters the ring by stepping over the top rope. He removes his hat and jacket and hands them to Sir Marvelous, both being careful with the way they treat the items. Sir M makes his way to the commentary desk, where Mak hands him a headset. "Welcome to commentary, Mister Marvelous!" "That's Sir Marvelous, Mister Francis." He says as he settles in, hanging his intracity carved cane beside him on the table. "Good grief," King mumbles, "I'm doing commentary with a bunch of cripples!" "What was that, King?" Mak asks. "Oh... I said 'I'm doing commentary with a bunch of great people'!" ... "How are you doing this evening, Sir Marvelous?" asks Mak. "I am doing quite well, as always. Mister Bruner is also doing excellently. He is relieved to not have much of a workload this evening, as he is taking on this little girl from the streets... ah, what was her name? Tayna?" "Taiga, Sir. Taiga Star." "And Introducing her opponent!!" Be a Man hits and the crowd cheers. The lights flash crazy until they go dim, then ultraviolet lasers stream from the entrance. "She is the SWF Cruiserweight Champion! Weighing in at one hundred and 'none of your damn business' pounds, and hailing from Helltown, Haverhill, Massachusetts, being accompanied to the ring by El Gordo Gigante... she is the Princess of Hardcore, TAAAIGAAA STAAARRR!!" She steps in front of the lasers and is momentarily hypnotized by them reflecting off her outstretched hands. She continues down the ramp as El Gordo follows. For a brief moment, he manages to block all but one of the laser effects. Taiga seems to be in a good mood and not at all afraid of the daunting task of facing a man twice as big as her. She tosses her title over the top rope and slides in under the bottom rope. The referee keeps Bruner back as Taiga pops up with the title and shows it off high overhead. Which is somewhat comical in the context of the highly-held title only comes up to Bruner's neck. She hands the title to Funyon, who brings it to the timekeeper's table with him. Referee Warner situates the wrestlers in their corners and checks each for foreign objects. He asks Bruner to remove his sunglasses, but doesn't get a reply. He asks again but is ignored. Warner thinks of what the consequences of fighting the Big Bully on the issue and thinks better than to push it. Instead he calls for the bell. *DING!!* Taiga and Bruner come together in the center of the ring. Taiga finds herself standing in front of a very large white dress shirt. She can read the buttons, which are inscribed with a designer suit logo, and she notices the fine stitching and detail work. Too bad the shirt is on the chest of Big Bully Bruner. She looks up... up... up... wow, this is one hell of a height difference we got here! Taiga was thankful for the shirt, because she didn't really want to be on eye level with a giant Black man's nipples. No, it's not that's he's Black, it's that he's huge. She looks up to his face again. Gulp. "Look at her, Mister King. She doesn't know where to begin." says Sir M. "I think she should just forfeit the match now. She's going to get seriously hurt otherwise." King replies. Mak pipes up. "Taiga's not a quitter though. She will never back down from a fight... no matter what the size of the opponent." "What a stupid, stubborn girl!" Marvelous scoffs. King smiles. "I've been trying to say that since she's started here in the SWF!!" Taiga smiles sweetly and offers up a knucklelock, of all things. "What does that little ghetto rat think she is doing?" Sir Marvelous asks aloud. Bruner wonders the same thing as he looks at her hand, which comes up to his shoulder. Kind of. He reaches out his hand, and just as she clasps on, he raises it into the air. Taiga is left on her tip-toes, reaching for the sky but not getting nearly as close to it as the Big Bully is. So she does what she always does... stomps on her opponents foot! Bruner no-sells. Taiga stomps his foot again, harder. Bruner winces a bit but laughs. Taiga stomps yet again... and is pushed! A mighty push which sends her back to the ropes! Sir Marvelous is heard laughing haughtily. "I don't know if Taiga has ever been in the ring with an opponent as large as the Big Bully," Mak says, "but I have serious doubts she can walk away with this match." "I don't know if she'll be able to walk away." says Marvelous. She disentangles herself from the ropes, straightens herself out, and walks back to face Bruner. Her smile is more cautious than sweet this time as she holds her hand up again. Bruner laughs and actually obliges, allowing her to get the knucklelock. Sort of. But no matter, as Taiga takes the arm with both hands and twists it into a rear hammerlock! Which has absolutely no effect on the Bully. Taiga is standing there wrenching away behind him, and he is sighing and rolling his eyes. When he's had enough of her, he knocks her away with a BUTT bump! She goes flying into the ropes again!! Bruner slowly turns around to see Taiga once again fighting out of the ropes. She stomps her foot and puts on her ~srs~ face. She storms right up to him with perpose... and... she holds out her hand for a handshake. Bruner looks at her, looks at her hand, looks at her... extends his hand... and slaps her across the face! Taiga goes flying aside, hitting the mat and rolling to the outside. She grabs her face and paces back and forth with a snarl on her face. El Gordo comes to check on her. "His hand is practically the size of her head!" Mak says. The referee tells her to get back into the ring, and Taiga tells him to keep Bruner back. Bruner does as he is told and waits patiently for her to enter the ring. She paces a few more times before rolling into the ring. As soon as she does, Bruner is there, attempting to stomp her... but she keeps rolling out of the way! He tells at her to stay still but she is not agreeing about that. She pops to her feet and ducks a big boot. She runs off the ropes and ducks the clothesline... okay, she doesn't have to duck. On the rebound she goes for the shoulder tackle... ...and she bounces right off!! "Like trying to tackle a brick wall, eh Mak?" asks King. Marvelous answers instead. "Mister Bruner is the biggest athlete in the SWF. Not only is he big, he is quite fast on his feet." Taiga scrambles to her feet and glares at her opponent. Bruner dares her to do it again. Taiga gets up a head of steam and this time uses a spear!! Which has the same effect as the shoulder tackle, she goes flying and Bruner remains unphased. He dares her to go again. Taiga loves a dare. She gets herself ready and flies off the ropes... runs right past Bruner... rebounds off the ropes behind him... and shoulder tackles his knee! The Big Bully wobbles but doesn't go down! She tries it again, this time with his other leg! Again he wobbles but does not go down!! So she re-tackles the first leg... Bruner to a knee!! Taiga runs off the rope in front of him... and is caught!! "There's that strength that Mister Bruner is known for," says Sir M, "And the reason why I hired him as my bodyguard." Bruner holds the struggling Star in his arms as he gets to his feet... then he just tosses her aside like a ragdoll!! Taiga rolls around a bit before coming to a stop. "That was a short-lived fury of offense by the Princess of Hardcore." says Mak. "And Bruner still has his shades on!" quips King. He stands over her body for a moment before picking her up by the hair. The ref admonishes this and actually starts a count. Bruner looks down at him and scowls. He lets go of her hair because he has her set up for his next move... a running spinebuster into the corner!! The crowd collectively winces at the awkward angle Taiga's neck bends into. She crumples down the corner and lands bonelessly. Bruner raises his arms proudly as the crowd boos loudly. He casually pulls her into the middle of the ring by her foot. A lateral press is a lazy cover... ONE! TW... Taiga kicks out. "This match is only beginning, and Taiga Star has proven several times that she is hard to keep down." Mak says. Big Bully chokes Taiga on the mat. The ref counts and Bruner releases before the five. He goes back to choking her. He stands as he is choking and the referee is yelling at him to release the hold. Referee Warner is again ignored as Bruner lifts her from the mat, single-handed, by her neck. He raises her way overhead and allows her to just dangle there. She starts to kick around a little and that's when Bruner throws her down with a chokeslam!! "He practically threw her through the ring!!" Mak exclaims. Bruner goes for another cover... ONE! TWO!! ...Taiga kicks out. Bruner picks her from the mat and gets her standing, just long enough to lock her in a full nelson! She tries to shout but her chest is too stretched to get a good breath. He shakes her in his grasp, and she is jostled about. He drops down with this, slamming her tailbone-first into the mat! She is stunned as Bruner rolls aside and to his feet. He centres himself behind her and picks her up with a reverse bearhug! He squeezes her ribs like a boa constrictor. She screams out and thrashes her legs. Bruner squeezes harder and shakes her about. She is flailing violently and with loose joints. He jumps with her and her head jostles on her shoulders. She is shaken again and her boobs flop around. She would have been embarrassed but she seems to not be registering anything at this point. Bruner yells at the ref that she is out. The referee asks her but gets no reply. He raises her hand... just to have it flop back down lifelessly.... ...He raises her hand again... and again, it flops back down.... ...For the third time, her hand is raised. It flops... gravity is taking it down... ...down... ...BUT NOT QUITE!! Taiga makes a fist and lets out a mighty roar. Bruner shakes her some more but she screams again!! She attempts punching him in the head but she knows damn well it's useless. Thank goodness Bruner was bored of the move, because she would have never gotten out of the move unless she was thrown aside! Taiga tumbles and rolls and drops out of the ring! The referee starts to count. ONE! El Gordo waddles from around the other side of the ring to see how she is. Bruner is leaning against the ropes, catching his breath. TWO!! "That's it Bruner, take your time with her." Marvelous says. THREE! Taiga mumbles something to Gordo. He doesn't hear it, so he bends closer to her. Bruner is stretching against the ropes. FOUR! El Gordo apparently hears what Taiga told him, which sends him under the ring looking for something. FIVE! Taiga crawls to the barricade and uses it to help stand herself up. Gordo is still under the ring. Bruner is pacing. SIX! El Gordo backs out from under the ring, sliding a table out with him!! Taiga is on her feet, bending her back into its proper shape. SEVEN! Bruner comes sliding out of the ring... Taiga catches this and rolls inside just as quickly (or un-quickly, as the case may be). Bruner glares at El Gordo through his sunglasses, and El Gordo backs away. Taiga stands back against the far ropes so that Bruner can slide back into the ring. She is quick to get on him however, stomping away at him, kicking his glasses off his face and stomping them. "That gutter-slut can stomp those sunglasses all day, and they won't break. They are made from the finest space-grade titanium flex and have been tested for years by the finest European athletes" Sir Marvelous explains, making note of the expense and prestige of the brand. Taiga jumps up and down, using Bruner's stomach as a trampling board. Then she grabs his legs to attempt some leg submissions. She lifts one massive leg and kicks the back of the knee several times before dropping it to the mat with a Knee-D-T. She pulls his leg again, attempting to turn him over. She steps over and pulls, but Bruner is not turning. She steps back in order to turn him in the other direction. Again, she is not very successful. She throws the limb down in disgust. Taiga steps away and Bruner gets to his knees. Taiga runs from the ropes and attempts to de-head him with a Yakuza kick! Bruner rubs his face and tells her to do it again. So, she does. She got much better aim this time and got an extremely stiff kick on him. It echoed through the building sickly. Bruner had a hard time no-selling it. Everyone could see the stars in his eyes. Taiga smiles wide and goes for one more kick... But Bruner blocks her foot and clocks her good in the jaw!! Taiga goes flying once again! (and it won't be the last time in this match either!) Bruner gets to his feet. He's so tall, it's like he stands up in layers. Well-dressed layers. He rubs the side of his face and clicks his jaw back into place. He spies Taiga laying across the ring. He scoops Taiga's lifeless body from the mat and hoists her overhead with a military press! "Look at that display of strength!" Mak says. To add insult to injury, Bruner starts doing reps! "Amazing that he can lift that much weight over and over like that!" King quips. "His strength should not surprise anyone, Mister King!" Marvelous says. Bruner finishes this display of strength by simply dropping her. Taiga bounces off the mat more than once before stopping. See, females do bounce! And Big Bully Bruner stands tall. Obviously. Bruner looks at the corner and smiles. He points, signaling for his Guillotine legdrop! He backs into the corner and climbs up to the middle rope. He sizes up his target and makes his move... ...Taiga rolls out of the ring, in front of the commentary desk!! Bruner lands on his ass in the middle of the ring!! "Listen here, street rat, the wrestling ring is that-a-way." Sir Marvelous says aloud, pointing to Taiga with a dismissive gesture. She turns around to glare at him. "Watch out behind you, sweetheart." Marvelous says snootily. Taiga turns around and sees Bruner up and getting ready to hit her with... something, but Taiga doesn't want to know. All she knows is to avoid flying four hundred pound wrestlers. She dashes around the corner and Bruner stops in his tracks. Taiga quickly rolls back in the ring and Bruner is right there, throwing her back-first into a corner. Taiga lands hard but sees what Bruner is about to do next... the big man is running for her! She drops and rolls out of the ring before becoming victim to a BUTT BUTT in the corner! Bruner lands hard on his ass!! From the outside, Taiga takes the lanyard from his sunglasses and chokes him with it! She uses her body weight to really pull down on the ends. The referee leans out of the ring and yells at her. El Gordo slaps the mat and gets the ref's attention my pointing and shouting in Spanish. Taiga continues to choke out the Big Bully. She tosses the sunglasses aside and clamors back into the ring. She nudges the ref out of the way so she can run from the far corner, washing Bruner's face with the sole of her boot! She runs to the opposite corner and does the same, about kicking his face off! She flies out from between the ropes, barely avoiding getting her arm tangled. "This is as much trouble as we've seen Bruner in this match." Mak says. "Mister Bruner does not get in trouble during a match, especially one like this." Marvelous says. Taiga walks around the ring and sets up the table Gordo found a few minutes ago, getting him to assist. She pulls the masked Mexican aside to have a few words with him. Meanwhile, in the ring, Bruner is slowly getting to his feet. Gordo and Taiga continue to adjust the table, assuring a perfect angle. Bruner quietly crosses the ring and climbs over the top rope to stand on the apron. He jumps off with an axe-handle that Taiga dodges by rolling onto the table. She squats on its surface and waits for her opponent to turn around. She leaps up and grabs the back of Bruner's head, putting her head to his with a headbutt drop!! Which doesn't have the effect she was looking for!! Taiga goes flying! However, she did cause a small effect to Big Bully Bruner, who stumbles around in place. He shakes it off quickly and makes his way to Taiga, who is laying on the floor, cradling her head. Bruner picks her up and slams her gut-first over the barricade! The crowd moves out of the way, a couple reach over in search of touching two of their favourite SWF Superstars. Bruner then picks her up and PILEDRIVES her into the floor!! The crowd gasps and stares in horror! Mak is practically jumping in his chair. "There's nothing but a half inch of foam between her head and the concrete arena floor!!" "I thought she had a hard head, Mak?" asks King. Sir Marvelous laughs. "The little dog doesn't have much of a bite, does she?" Bruner throws his hands in the air and lets out a mighty roar, making a throat-slashing gesture signaling that IT'S OVAH~!! He picks her up and lays her out on the table. Then he climbs back onto the apron. He appears to be calculating the proper angle of move, planning to kill Taiga with a legdrop through the table! Bruner leaps from the apron... and time seems to slow down. Taiga's eyes open and she sees Bruner's leap. She slides off the table and rolls out of the way. El Gordo, who was standing next to the table, sees Bruner's leap as well. He steps between the table and the Big Bully. El Gordo catches Bruner mid-air, managing to DRIVE HIM THROUGH THE TABLE WITH A FLAPJACK!! The crowd goes crazy! "HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT!" Referee Warner begins the ten count. ONE! "Damn illegal Mexican help!" Sir Marvelous shouts. TWO! Taiga is up on weak legs. Bruner is out, face-down in the table's splinters. THREE! Taiga calls El Gordo over. She motions to him top help her get Bruner back into the ring so she can pin him. FOUR! "In the ring, Gordo!!" Taiga yells. FIVE! Taiga picks up Bruner's arm and puts it over her shoulders and tries her damnest, but the big man won't budge. SIX! Gordo finally figures it out, and does as Taiga is, and the two of them try to get the massive Bully off the floor... SEVEN!! ...But Gordo gets out of breath and needs a second... EIGHT! A second that Taiga doesn't have! She drops Bruner... NINE!! ...and slides in under the bottom rope! ...TEN!! Referee Warner calls for the bell. *DING!!* "That gutterslut and her dirty Mexican!" Marvelous shouts as he slams the headset onto the desk, grabs his cane, and hustles off to the ring as fast as he can limp. Be a Man reprises and Funyon makes the announcement. "Ladies and gentlemen, the winner of the match via countout, TAIGA STAR!!" Taiga books it out of the ring before Bruner comes to. Sir M is already hovering over the big man, encouraging him to get up. The referee grabs the Cruiserweight title and runs it to her, then raises her hands high. "That was disgusting, Mak, the way Taiga just stole the match like that." "She did what she had to in order to beat the big man!" "Referee Warner must be on the take. Why didn't he throw out the match?" Mak sighs. "You know as well as I do the accomplishments that Mister Warner as a referee." "Even a great man can be bought off, for the right price." Mak thinks for a moment. "Wait, King... if Taiga is such a ghetto girl, how would she be able to buy off a referee?" "Well," King replies, "She can afford to buy off a Mexican."