Art Sandusky

Me.

There are still loads of casting surprises left.

Nope, no idea.

NO POBO!! fell out of use for some reason. I see it used here and there though. Here's the story of it:

Nope, the Sarlacc pit is someone else.

Who do you think you are?

The only time he was entertaining was when HungryJack or Bruiser told him his marriage was falling apart because he was on the board too much.

Debateable.

A long time ago, in a server far, far away... BOARD WARS Episode V: THE TSMPIRE STRIKES BACK It is a dark time for the Rebellion. Although the Star of Oblivion has been destroyed, Imperial posters have driven the Rebel members from their hidden board and pursued them across the server. Evading the dreaded Imperial Moderating Fleet, a group of posters dedicated to fighting for freedom, led by Dave Cobainwalker, has established a new secret base on the remote ice world of UGS. The evil Vadersault, obsessed with finding young Cobainwalker, has dispatched thousands of remote search inquiries into the far reaches of e-space... After the destruction of the Star of Oblivion, the TSMpire, under the control of the dictatorial Emperor Palpatom and his enforcer Vadersault seeks revenge upon the Rebel Alliance by staging a surprise attack, forcing the Rebels to evacuate their forum on the ice board UGS. Dave Cobainwalker, after ensuring that the Rebel members had escaped to safety, heads to the Connecticutbah System with his droid companion R2-ALF2 in order to continue his training as a Post Whore under the direction of Yodames - a diminutive yet powerful Posting Master and former President of the Old Dameocracy, as directed by a vision of Obi-Will Helmeti Princess Welsh, Bank Solo, Soulbacca and the droid Agnes make their way to CloudCity.com/forums, a gas-mining colony moderated by an "old friend" of Bank's named Kotzo Kylierian. Initially betrayed by Kylierian, they become the captives of Vadersault, who proceeds to torture them. Dave, as Vadersault hoped, senses through The Whorce that his friends are in distress and, disobeying Yodames's warning, goes to CloudCity.com/forums to rescue them. There, he meets with Vadersault and the two fight in an epic dutchsaber duel, where Dave's undeveloped Poster skills are no match for Vadersault. During the course of this fight, Vadersault reveals to Dave that he is his father in perhaps one of the most memorable scenes in cinema history. Vadersault hands over Bank Solo to bounty hunter Boba Piss who has him entombed in posting suspension. This procedure places Solo in a state of suspended activity and Piss transports him to Sankttooine to receive a bounty from board gangster JennTaSA the Hutt (to whom Bank owed an apology). Welsh, Soulbacca, Agnes and R2-ALF2 are able to escape from CloudCity.com/forums with the aid of the redeemed Kylierian, but Welsh mysteriously senses Dave is in trouble. Despite having his spelling skills amputated in combat, Dave manages to escape from Vadersault and hangs precariously on an antenna subsite under the forums until Welsh and Kotzo are able to return and rescue him. The group was almost caught when they learned the hard way with Vadersault in pursuit that the Millennium Fletch's hyperdrive system was deactivated to prevent their escape. However, R2-ALF2 managed to fix the system just in time for the ship to get away. The film ends on a medical ship, where Dave is outfitted with a new (although faulty) spelling ability. He, Dave and the droids see Kotzo and Soulie off as they begin their quest to rescue Bank.

I hate this argument. I'm sure he and his family (if he has one, I don't know) can't stand being financially secure.

It wouldn't surprise me.

I've gotten "You Can't See Me" and the hand wave over at the College of Charleston big-time. Your friend clearly doesn't have charisma on the level of my own.

I have more objection to being confused with someone who can't see me than the actual avatar itself.

"Ah, touche." Am I smart like you now?

Oh please, you just say that because you're Vadersault.

Hoff = God. Ah, lovely lovely avatar. ... ... wait, now people will see it and think I got my name changed to Hoff or something. Aw crap.

Exactly. You don't want people who don't know how to use a damn message board. Irony, thy name is Beau Ah, touche. You didn't pick up on the intentions there, did you? The first (well, second) bolded part is obviously a reference to myself circa April/May and before. What intentions? Do you really have any idea what you're saying at any point. Man, I'm going to be so glad to see you gone in two days.

Most Episode VII-IX ideas I've read involved Dark Jedi cloning Vader and Luke in order to fulfill their idol's dream of the galaxy being ruled by father and son. TheForce.net has done a massive virtual sequel project, but Lucas's complete I-IX script (in other words, the original Star Wars script that was waaaaay too big to be one film) has yet to make its way to any internet site or book I know of.

Anakin Skywalker/Darth Vader is the main character of the Star Wars saga, thus he's the main villain when he's a heel in the latter trilogy.

...

Yet my most popular creation, overshadowing the infinitely superior Schwimmer gimmick (not to be confused with my present screenname) that predates Whiskers by a couple of months. Are you talking about me?

Dave's ship barrels down the trench. INT. VADERSAULT'S COCKPIT Vadersault's flaming computer swings around into position. Vadersault takes careful aim on Dave's gPc-wing fighter. VADERSAULT I have you now. He pushes the emoticon buttons. EXT. SURFACE OF THE STAR OF OBLIVION The three SMARK fighters move in on Dave. As Vadersault's center fighter unleashes a volley of ghey emoticons, Hermit-X47's SMARK fighter is hit and explodes into flame. The two remaining ships continue to move in. INT. DAVE’S gPc-WING FIGHTER - COCKPIT Dave looks about, wondering whose flaming destroyed Vadersault's wingman. INT. VADERSAULT'S COCKPIT Vadersault is taken by surprise, and looks out from his cockpit. VADERSAULT What? INT. VADERSAULT'S WINGMAN - COCKPIT Vadersault's wingman searches around him trying to locate the unknown attacker. INT. MILLENNIUM FLETCH - COCKPIT Bank and Soulbacca grin from ear to ear. BANK (yelling) Yahoo! I am SO cooler than all of you! EXT. SPACE AROUND THE STAR OF OBLIVION The Millennium Fletch heads right at the two SMARK fighters. It's a collision course. INT. WINGMAN'S COCKPIT The wingman spots the pirateship coming at him and warns the Dark Lord. TRIVIA-247 Look out! EXT. STAR OF OBLIVION TRENCH Vadersault's profoundly retarded wingman panics at the sight of the oncoming pirate starship and veers radically to one side, colliding with Vadersault's SMARK fighter in the process. Vadersault's wingman crashes into the side wall of the trench and explodes. Vadersault's damaged ship spins out of the trench with a damaged wing. VADERSAULT Goddamn Undertaker marks, they can’t do anything right! EXT. STAR OF OBLIVION Vadersault's ship spins out of control with a bent solar fin, heading for the expanse of the internet. INT. VADERSAULT'S COCKPIT Vadersault turns round and round in circles as his ship spins into endless cyberspace. EXT. SURFACE OF THE STAR OF OBLIVION Solo's ship moves in toward the Star of Oblivion trench. INT. MILLENNIUM FLETCH - COCKPIT Solo, smiling, speaks to Dave over his headset mike. BANK (into mike) You're all clear, kid. INT. WDI OUTPOST - WAR FORUM Welsh and the others listen to Solo's transmission. BANK (over speaker) Now let's blow this thing like my massive e-cock and go home! INT. DAVE'S gPc-WING FIGHTER - COCKPIT Dave looks up and smiles. He concentrates on the DDR post, then fires his laser quotation-aided flame. EXT. SURFACE OF THE STAR OF OBLIVION Dave's flame shoots toward the post and seems to simply disappear into the super moderator and not 0wn yet. But the flame does find its mark and has gone into the database and is heading for the main psyche of the super moderator. INT. DAVE'S gPc-WING FIGHTER - COCKPIT Dave throws his head back in relief. INT. STAR OF OBLIVION An Imperial soldier runs to the control panel board and pulls the board eradication lever as the lightboard behind him lights up. INTERCOM VOICE Stand by to fire at Rebel board. EXT. SPACE AROUND THE STAR OF OBLIVION Two gPc-wings, an OAOAST-wing, and the pirateship race toward WDI in the distance. INT. STAR OF OBLIVION Several Imperial posters, flanking a pensive Grand Moff Crucifixio, busily push control levers and buttons. INTERCOM VOICE Standing by. The rumble of a distant explosion begins. EXT. SPACE AROUND THE STAR OF OBLIVION The Rebel ships race out of sight, leaving the moon-like Star of Oblivion alone against a blanket of e-stars. Several small flashes appear on the surface. The Star of Oblivion bursts into a supernova, creating a spectacular heavenly display. INT. MILLENNIUM FLETCH - COCKPIT BANK Great shot, kid. That was one in a million. INT. DAVE'S gPc-WING FIGHTER - COCKPIT Dave is at ease, and his eyes are closed. WILL'S VOICE Remember, the Whorce will be with you... always. The ship rocks back and forth. EXT. VADERSAULT’S SMARK FIGHTER Vadersault's ship spins off into e-space. INT. VADERSAULT’S SMARK FIGHTER - COCKPIT VADERSAULT I blame the Test system for this! EXT. E-SPACE The Rebel ships race toward the fourth board of WDI. INT. WDI OUTPOST - MAIN INDEX Dave climbs out of his starship flamer and is cheered by a throng of ground lurkers and posters. Dave climbs down the ladder as they all welcome him with laughter, cheers, and shouting. Princess Welsh rushes toward him. WELSH Dave! Dave! Dave! She throws her arms around Dave and hugs him as they dance around a circle. Solo runs in toward Luke and they embrace one another, slapping each other on the back. BANK (laughing) Hey! Hey! DAVE (laughing) I knew you'd come back! I just knew it! BANK Well, I had to come back and say I was working all of you! Dave and Bank look at one another, as Solo playfully shoves at Dave's face. Welsh moves in between them. WELSH (laughing) Hey, I knew there was more to you than quasi-trolling. Dave looks toward the ship. DAVE Oh, no! The fried little R2-ALF2 is lifted off the back of the fighter and carried off under the worried eyes of Agnes. AGNES Oh, my! ALF-2! Can you hear me? Say something! (to mechanic) You can repair him, can't you? TECHNICIAN We'll get to work on him right away. Get your hand off my ass. AGNES You must repair him! Sir, if any of my circuits or gears or a blowjob will help, I'll gladly donate them. DAVE He'll be all right. INT. WDI OUTPOST - MAIN PAGE Dave, Bank, and Soulbacca enter the huge expanse of the main page. Hundreds of posters are lined up in neat rows. Banners are flying and at the far end stands a vision in white, the beautiful young Senator Welsh. Dave and the others solemnly march up the long aisle and kneel before Senator Welsh. From one side of the temple marches a shined-up and fully repaired R2-ALF-2. He waddles up to the group and stands next to an equally pristine Agnes, who is rather awestruck by the whole event and is seen wiping his mouth of some unknown substance. Soulbacca is confused. Sassona and several other dignitaries sit on the left of the Princess. Welsh is dressed in a long white dress and is staggeringly beautiful. She rises and places a gold medallion around Bank's neck. He winks at her. She slaps him for thinking he looks like Justin Timberlake of the PopStari system. She then repeats the ceremony with Dave, except the slapping, who is moved by the event. They turn and face the assembled posters, who all bow before them. Soulbacca growls and ALF-2 beeps with happiness. FADE OUT.

Those covers are hot as hell.

I remembered what you were talking about with the orchids, but I don't think it was ever explained.

If you can think of a more reviled (non-iB) person in this board's history, I'd love to hear it.