Kinetic

Were Georgia to run the table this year, they'd almost be assured the top spot in the BCS at the end of the regular season. I don't think they will, but whatever. When you have a schedule that includes Arizona State, Alabama, Tennessee, LSU, Florida, and Auburn, I think you should be allowed a little tune-up against Georgia Southern. Why am I defending Georgia?

I'm sure this will be the source of much brow-furrowing and consternation amongst the assorted dudes and bros here in Athens, but it's pretty irrelevant. Georgia will have plenty of opportunities to play themselves back into the top spot later in the season.

"A superhunky bad-boy ice hockey player from cold country." Ahahaha, oh brother.

Yes.

TheLukester David Schwimmer

Decades of heartache broken up only by occasional periods of the team not existing. There's an impending quarterback controversy, with one of the guys being a scrub coming off of a flukey good year and the other being a latent homosexual from the nation's most abhorrent major college football program. The defense should be better but won't be. The head coach is one Shoney's breakfast buffet away from a major coronary situation. The team plays in a city playfully (but accurately) referred to as "The Mistake by the Lake." 8-8.

Yes.

Another violent crime in Murder City. How has our friend Incandenza managed to survive down there for so long?

Charlie Marvin Jimm Ross

Yeah, it's a shame that the entire "Boardum" thread isn't preserved somewhere for the benefit of future generations. Society's loss, I guess.

I'm pretty sure he meant Bernard Berrian.

Yeah, I heard Cindy McCain mention that on This Week with George Snuffleupagus. I'm struggling with that one a little bit. What have Alasko-Russian relations been like under Palin? The Cindy McCain interview served to really piss me off, actually. Why do people who have inherited a lot of money get so upset when it's pointed out that they've inherited a lot of money?

WSH@NYG DET@ATL SEA@BUF NYJ@MIA KC@NE TB@NO STL@PHI HOU@PIT JAC@TEN CIN@BAL DAL@CLE CAR@SD ARZ@SF CHI@IND MIN@GB DEN@OAK

Is every team message board that bad? The Bucs one is really similar in that there's constant "the sky is falling" overreaction to every piddling little detail of everything the team has done this offseason. There were even a couple of "pack it in, the season's over" threads because Chris Simms was released. The fuck, people? And the grammar! This place is like a message board for librarians compared to that place. Plus, there's no cursing and every sarcastic statement has to be posted in blue. I don't know why I lurk there. Better to stick to this here Patriots board.

It's the 4th quarter in a packed Louisiana Superdome and the Saints lead by 3. Outside the waterlogged and battered city struggles with the aftermath of another devastating hurricane, but inside the beloved Saints are but one 3rd-and-1 conversion away from sealing a victory against division rival Tampa Bay. Offensive genius Sean Payton calls a daring quadruple reverse, the ball eventually ending up in the hands of Reggie Bush five yards behind the line of scrimmage. He jukes and eludes one tackler, visions of a "Reggie Bush Saves New Orleans" headline in Monday's Times-Picayune dancing through his head. He has one man to beat. Bush spins, is hit, and he fumbles the ball. It's recovered by Cato June and returned 73 yards for a touchdown. The Saints lose, New Orleans reels, and the team is eventually moved to L.A. 24-20, Bucs.

TSM has released Swarley, Anakin Flair, Brocklock, The Flamboyance, Silence, MARTYEWR, foleyfanforever88, kirkovic, UndertakerHart, invader3K, megaadvice, and alro. Corey Lazarus, The Poster Formerly Known as EHME, and bob barron have been designated for assignment to TSM Europa. Brooklyn Zoo, Cran Da Maniac, and boon have been signed to the practice squad.

That wouldn't surprise me at all. Their big issue last year was injuries. If they can stay healthy this year and not fall too far behind NO and/or Tampa while Steve Smith is suspended, then who knows? They have a fair amount of talent and a coach who needs to have a good year to save his job. I'd say they're in the 8-10 win range and right in the mix for the NFC South at the end of the year.

A very special birthday message to Dandy from Chris Berman: name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><embed src=" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object>&"> name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><embed src=" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object>&" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" wmode="transparent" width="425" height="350" />

A very special birthday message to two very special posters (and Enigma):

Shawne Merriman is an idiot. The short-term gain is so dwarfed by the potential long-term ramifications that I can't even believe that he's considering playing this year. It's not even just his football career; one awkward hit on that knee could severely impact the quality of his life after football, which could begin as soon as 2009. I'm starting to get the feeling that the Chargers are going to be somewhat less than advertised this season. Have you seen the way Rivers has been hobbling around in the preseason? Then again, there's no one in their division that could really challenge even a banged-up version of that team. Denver? Please. 10-6.

Pffft, yeah, in TNA. Whatever that is.

Sweet. Tonght's forecast for all Dallas/Fort Worth area titty bars: a 90% chance of rain. Especially this one.

Could be useful in celebrating any upcoming board milestones.

The Titans are possibly the dullest team in the league to watch. For as great as he was in college, Vince Young is kind of just a guy at this level. He doesn't seem to be progressing at all, either. The Titans have a good defense and solid running game, though. I'd say 8-8 for them.

Good call, Something Wonderful. I do get a little bit of a naked Marlboro Man vibe from Matt every now and then.