Nighthawk

Yeah, that doesn't top the Cyclone at Coney Island.

Not to mention breathing fire and strecting your arms across the room.

Smoking.

I think the fumes are kicking in cause I'm busting a fucking gut at the name Zoofus the dinosaur.

How's that pay? Palaeontology.

Fuck New Me, you should just get fucking pissed tonight, gradually post more and more insane shit, I'd love you forever. I did that last night and you told me to lay off the mescaline. Maybe I'll sniff some rubber cement... despite what you may have heard, it will fuck you up.

*collapses at party and has semen pumped from stomach*

Metal Ed is dead.

I'd probably have to go with preventing the football injury as well, a knee, that still hurts. 96 that was. Having my current knowledge would probably help with other things too... like, I don't know, rip off some Eminem songs that hadn't come out yet and become a famous rapper.

See, now this kind of freestyling sarcasm isn't much better than the effeminite jokes. Stupid whore is good though.

I don't just want to come out and say it guys Hydrogen is the best element

Texas Instruments is the best calculator

24 is the highest number

Best song ever is Rockin the Casbah

A real heterosexual would be confident enough to kiss with tongue. I was joking, dude. Taking the piss, as it were. So was I. What I said was so gay, I'm not gay enough to say it. Only gays say that.

A real heterosexual would be confident enough to kiss with tongue.

Impossible. This can only mean you don't think I'm very gay at all.

I'm less gay than you probably think.

Robin Williams should be ashamed of Patch Adams before anything else. And on the subject of pandering, saccharin bullshit, Kevin Spacey oughta be ashamed of Pay It Forward.

McDonald's used to have fairly complex musical numbers in their commercials, full 60 second productions about the weight of the world getting you down and so forth, which, being the unusual music fan I am, I found great. Once they switched to the jingle, and eventually just a slogan, it's gotten progressively worse. I didn't care for "Have You Had Your Break Today", although it was better than "Did Somebody Say McDonalds?", and now it's at it's worst yet.

Well, the thundercats villain becomes Cunt-ra. You can say things like Curse of the Cunny's Tomb. And because it sounds like countrify, you can say it in front of your parents.

Cuntrify is better than those. It's a derivation of something to do with a mummify. Cuntrification.

Cuntrify (verb). I just made it up, but I like it.

Piracy is so fucking played. I used to like pirates.

After some deliberation, I would like my name changed to: Professor Murder Thanks in advance.